HAIL OUR PEOPLE!

may 12

http://goaskalice.columbia.edu/answered-questions/why-did-she-break-me-0

i get a get ask alice email every friday and im sure this one came up before haha

https://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/little-white-girl-shot-in-head-by-negro-thugs-over-snapchat/105929

never forget, weev is a great writer too

ok did some errands, beautiful day, should go for powerwalk.

11 hours of sleep hehehe. it brings muh average up only a few minutes, to about 8 hours and 27 minutes hehe.

i dont see how omar sharif could be less than at least half whyte. he looks very hwyte for having a shitty arab name like that. or turk.  i think he was a turk. but he was pretty handsome and very whyte looking. heh. dr zhivago on classic movie channel atm hahaha.

laid down for 2 hours, tried to take a powernap. prob got no more than 30 minutes actual sleep. still worth it!

watched part of the movie hacksaw ridge. i guess it was ok but it seemed TOO VIOLENT. I got tired of all the grim, gruesome, harrowing War Violence. people getting their legs blown off etc.

i KNOW its trying to say “WAR IS HELL” and that director MEL GIBSON is a GREAT man…..but i still think you could make a decent war movie without such Graphic Violence and still get across the point War Is Hell.

also, plenty of Boomers had fathers who were in ww2 fighting the natzees. these people can prob never be convinced that the natsees were really the good guys and that you should hail the hakenkreuz hahahahaha. they just wont buy it. they were raised thinking natzees were the enemy and that AH was the most evil person who ever lived and that being an NS is treasonous and UNAMERICAN.

well i say listen to GLR then. he actually fought in WW2 and still became a natsee. wearing an armband and everything.

sheeeeeit they had SMORES ice cream at the store. this is a weakness of mine hahaha. some stores normally have smores ice cream. i dont go to that store normally. i normally go to a store that does NOT normally have smores ice cream hehehehe.

kind of like drawing a “swazi” on your chest while pounding a B, you could also have a giant picture of AH near your bed or on the ceiling, that she could look at while you were pounding her.

are you fooking kidding me? my BMR is like 1490 (1433 heheheheh) calories. meaning if i eat 1500 calories a day, i will GAIN WEIGHT.

1452. if i eat 1453 calories a day, i will GAIN WEIGHT. well, up to the point that i will then need more than 1453 calories to sustain my new larger weight hahahaha.

ayyyy check this out. its an actual human reader with a decent voice. i hate the text to speech computer readers.  cant believe yt hasnt taken it down yet. im sure they will.

heh 50 pages in and its kinda boring. slow moving hahaha. he either needs to talk about women, jooz, or his feelz moar hahaha. well right now he’s talking about how the social democrats are using trade unions as a political tool. but that wanting better working conditions is not an inherently jooish thing. actually he has not really mentioned joos yet. i imagine when he does the book will be a lot less boring hahaha. hes only very briefly mentioned the Twin Evils of Marxism and Joory. and hasn’t really tied them into the Social Democrats or Trade Unions yet.

but i want him to talk more about surviving day to day. sheeeit by the time he was 21 he was no longer working contstruction jobs 80 hours a week and was working as a painter/artist and had time to read after work and was not constantly stressed out even though he wasnt rich. so he was a winner normie chad then hahahah.

his father died when he was 13 and his mother died when he was 15 of Breast Cancer. He had a brother named Edmund Hister who died when he was 2 or 3 hehehehe.

i would have liked to hear more stories about him interviewing for jobs and not getting them. not making enough money to rent a room or eat his bread and milk. getting fired from jobs for being incompetent. getting fired from jobs for not wanting to joo, scam, cheat and lie to his company’s clients.

and no talk of women! did he go to hookers? they had to have had gypsy hookers in 1910 vienna hahahahaha. i mean yeah hookers are degenerate but he had to have urges! did he have GFs he just didnt write about? why didnt he get married to them and have children? i mean we know he eventually got with eva braun and they prob banged a few times hahahahaahaha. i thought he “dated” her for a longass time, at least 10 years. too bad they didnt have any children. but think of the shame that would have been brought on any such children!

listened to some of taake noregs vaapen since he will def play some songs from here. guitar sound is great, drums sound a little like a machine though! also it doesnt seem as hot-blooded as the earlier stuff. (ie, more boring, more mid-paced, less adventurous, more going through the motions, less inspired hahahahaha, good lord, if this is his Good later album and “stridens hus” is “going through the motions”, i hate to hear how boring that one is hahahahahahahahhahahaha) also the banjo is not super ridiculous as you would think. all people talk about is the banjo. banjo banjo banjo. i would use a theremin in my black metal hahahaha.

but yeah i am sure it will be a great show. never been to the venue but i dont think its too large and more importantly its not in the god damn black ghetto.

at least in 1910 vienna the hookers werent covered in tattoos and were probably good looking and not fat and dressed less slutty than NORMIE women today hehehehe. and didnt fook blacks because there were no blacks, and probably didnt even fook too many turks. maybe they fooked dirty gypsies. just trying to think what kind of nonwhites would have been in 1910 vienna. there were probably a tiny number of turks. i imagine there would be more joos and gypsies! and they hadnt yet created a “popular culture” to turn normie hwyte gurls into whores! women were still getting married and having babies young. men could afford to have children at age 21.

i wish women had some loyalty. but this is holding women to mens standards and will always result in disappointment.

but heres the thing: race mixing is objectively bad. hehehe. IMHO.

yeah well for WOMEN its NOT inherently bad. if it means getting the STRONGER mate.

basically, race mixing is bad for men and women. therefore its BAD when women do it. even though they dont THINK its bad. and we cant EXPECT them to think that its bad. because in Woman World, race mixing is NOT bad.

but it IS bad! because it weakens our race!

but WOMEN dont think its bad, because STRENGTH, not RACE, is the only thing that matters!

also, even a young immature man can see that the black thuggish displays of “STRENGTH” are not real strength at all. but just thuggish apefrican bigman ooga booga jungle bullshit. we can see right away this man might appear strong but that he would be a horrible long term mate, terrible husband, terrible father, its all surface, it’s SO OBVIOUSLY all surface, and we woman haters rightfully resent women for not being able to see that OBVIOUS truth! cant you see THIS IS NOT REAL STRENGTH???????!?!?!?!?!?!

at least MEN are smart enough to know that a qt young gurl is not automatically a good wife and mother!

welll……not me. i ended up falling in luv with sluts, same way stupid women fall in luv with shitty deadbeat thugs. you are blinded by how HAWT they are that you think they HAVE to be perfect.

i just think its DISGUSTING how they can think these APE MEN are HAWT. at least the young sluts i fell in luv with were objectively qt. and didnt LOOK LIKE TRASH.

weev says that selling tshirts does not make much money, that its mainly good for “branding” rather than making money.

https://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/ideas-for-getting-stormer-funded/106012/

http://mashable.com/2017/05/11/delete-facebook/#uC96LsNwXSqd

hes a jooish leftist writing for a jooish phagazine but he’s not entirely incorrect hahaha. you should delete your f4gbook. zucc is one sneaky sneaky joo.

may 13

new nokturnal mortum album, first in like 8 years since the ridiculously vaunted “voice of steel.” so, a band coming back after a HUGE hiatus, AND following up the HUGEST album of their career. LOT of hype here.

i especially like that they were “NS” for a while and hopefully are still JQ wise. hope they are not degenerate alcoholics.

also, 74 minute albums are not my thing, i prefer 40 minute albums. but i respect varggoth’s musical aesthetic and hopeful racialism hahahaha. would totally see them live but they will prob never do a us tour. but if they did it will be pretty soon!

https://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/dont-reproduce-goyim/105727

slate article: you will hate your husbando after your kids are born, so dont have kids goyim hahaha

had weird nightmare last night where there was this weird grotesque sexual hell where people were doing these violent torturous torture porn shit in huge bloody orgies of death, sex was associated with violent torturous death, rooms full of people fooking each other with razor dild0z, women doing azz to azz with razor dild0z and tearing each other apart, all while being stung by swarms of bees and hornets, people being torn apart by fook machines. it was horrifying.

if something were not a degenerate orgy of blood right now, it would turn that way. but i was horny and there were all these qt young women. i was running to escape the rooms that had horrifying orgies of blood and death, and then found a room with qt nice soft nonviolence. and i was like, welp, i want to touch this qt gurl. buttttttt…….this is clearly some kind of hell, and this is gonna get really horrible, right?

i found myself with a beautiful yougn girl and then stuffed muh face into her young Flower hahaha and then it felt all cold, like cold raw meat, and i realized that the gurl was dead or dying and there i was eating her cold dead coont.

of course that was nothing compared to the people getting TORN APART in other rooms.

there was the implication that this was part of a book trilogy like “divine comedy” and this was the hell/inferno part, and the longest book of the three, and that the books may have been written by the mysterious black metal band deathspell omega or their evil sadistic degen singer, that crazy finnish guy hahahaha.

but i know he’s not really that crazy, and that none of them are THIS edgy as the stuff in this nightmare.  MA might even be a nationalist! but yeah his old power electronics stuff was pretty dark and evil and depraved. maybe the dream was a reference to all that. probably. i totally understand his interest in nationalism, i totally do not understand his interest in that Nihilistic, Evil, Degen, Pornographic stuff. he should focus on the former, and abandon the latter.

now certainly i dont like how joos have turned secs into a jooish, degenerate, pornographic, horrible hell on earth, but certainly its not as bad as seen in this dream, i mean thats why they call it a nightmare hahaha. but i am also butthurt about never being able to enjoy secs with a woman, really to never be able to enjoy being with women period, including cuddling and dating and hanging out.

it might not be like a living hell torture porn, but it still is a disgusting degenerate jooish farce of lies, disappointment, heartbreak, and butthurt ahahhahahahaha.

ok so i might have three diff versions of MK going right now hahaha. 1. manheim translation book. 2. audiobook above. 3. stalag edition online. in the first 2, they have AH using the word “K1KE” near the end of chapter 2 where he talks about the j being as a maggot in an abscess. in stalag, word “K1KE” does not appear. so….wat do hahahaha.

i dont care if he DOES use the word!!! i just dont want people putting words in his mouth!

anyway. point is, in the second part of chap 2, he finally begins talking about the J and hopefully does not stop.

heh. tfw when you are reading AH’s thoughts on the J and you realize you feel the exact same way hahahahahahahaha.

but yeah what a fooked up dream. im surprised it didnt affect me MORE. hey i think i would actually take this dream, over a dream with That Woman.

isnt that great. i would rather have dreams of women being torn apart by double ended ass to ass dild0s, in a sadistic jooish torture porn hell, than have any kind of dream with THAT WOMAN hahahaha. very telling.

you know that sense of sleaze and this is dirty and wrong that you get when you see porno? that is the essence of pure jooishness. and they want you to enjoy it. embrace this jooish sickness. become as sick and degen as they are.

Image result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerateImage result for absolutely degenerate

DEGENERACY NEVER!

VICTORY FOREVER!

HAIL VICTORY!

HAIL OUR PEOPLE!

HAIL OUR RACE!

i might be alienating people who are willing to Stop Watching Porn but are unwilling to question the Jooish aspects of porn. that does kinda suck. well to you i say: FINE. just IGNORE my Vitriolic, Virtulent, Hister-tier Anti-Semitic Ranting, and Stop Watching Porn ANYWAY. it is such a SIMPLE task that will have such concrete, immediate results. PROVE ME WRONG. Prove the Joo-hater wrong. just stop watching the porn for your health. that is made by rich evil hwyte kleptocrats. white globalists hahahahaha.

its not globalism thats bad, its all the white males at the top who are exploiting workers globally thats bad!!!!!

anyway. who cares if porn is jooish or not. (it is.) just stop watching it and you will reap solid benefits very quickly. i cannot help but feel CONTEMPT and PITY for people who still watch porn. PATHETIC. i cant believe millions of white men watch it regularly. and their wives and gfs just think its normal.

maybe evil rich white males want you to THINK its normal. so you can watch it every day and be a pathetic, contemptible jerkoff who delights in depraved, sleazy sin.

they used to tell you you’d go blind, you’d grow hair on your palms, you’d never get a gf. well at least one of those things is true hahaha.

AH is implying that men should not vote until age 30. this is a very good idea. well, he says “should not involve themselves in politics until 30, so as to develop the weltanschauung” etc etc.

not sure if he means voting. but if voting were restricted to MEN ONLY, ABOVE 30, that would be a YUGE improvement over current.

heres a cartoon emily youcis did i guess somewhat recently. not bad. pretty good!

i mean she has seen both those worlds. hope she doesnt go back to the degen one.

yeah shes prob crazy. yeah shes prob fooked more than 20 guys hahahaha. yeah political / racial women are inherently CRAZY. yeah her previous art was so degenerate, it was like the stuff i saw in my awful nightmare last night. but i still generally like her and think she’ll stay on a good path. really a woman like her would be TOO GOOD for me hahaha.

That Woman was TOO GOOD for me. it was MY FAULT i lost her becuase i was TOO WEAK to HOLD ONTO a good woman like her. the perfect person at the WORST time. DAMN. how can i ever forgive myself for being At Fault in losing the Best Woman I ever met? How will I ever get over this?

ehehehe. MY MIND IS THINKING more of those that woman thoughts and its all my fault and ill never get over it thoughts. lets just play cards and read MK by AH.

i would get a masters degree in Hwyte Studies HAHAAHAHAHA. there will never ever ever ever BE a masters degree in Hwyte studies! there are many masters degrees in ANTI hwyte studies!!!!!!!!!!

Higher Education is DEEPLY Antihwyte! that is one of my big problems with it hehehe.

i cant say inherently because it wasnt ALWAYS inherently antiwhyte hehe

some 18 year olds are obsessed with becoming a nurse or doctor or engineer and getting all A’s in their college classes so they can get into MEDICAL SCHOOL and become a DOCTOR. why couldnt i have been like that. though medical schools are full of nonwhytes, i dont think actual medical education is itself very antihwyte in content the way all arts and humanities are. and “social sciences” dear god that word. how about social studies. thats what we used to call history in grade school. i think its a more honest term than social sciences!

Ernst Zundel sez that ANTIS3M1TISM IS A NATURAL REACTION TO S3M1TISM hehehehe. Started listening to that 2 hour interview he did wit the israeli journalist. it takes about 20 minutes to start getting good. but i think its gonna get real good, with him saying gems like that. DIS GON B GUD.gif

somebody on daily stormer suggested reaching out to “pro white celebrities like phil anselmo” for big time shekels.  i know he had semi apologized for his drunken “white power” remarks, when i hoped he would be like, yeah im a racist, so what. but hes just sorta cucked with shucks im sorry, i was drunk, i grew up in nola with tons of black people, all humanity is equally shitty, some of my heroes are black men, bla bla bla. CUCKING.

and now he’s saying he was MOLESTED as a child. well that sucks but him saying that NOW seems kinda bad timing. he shoulda just said that years ago because now it sounds like hes cucking again. oh im a damaged person because i was molested. its terrible to be molested, its NOT terrible to be a racist, and its like hes really groveling for the joos now. oh you cant hate me, i was MOLESTED.

http://www.rollingstone.com/music/features/phil-anselmo-opens-up-about-racism-panteras-legacy-w456501

so in other words, i REALLY dont think he’d support daily stormer. at all.

anyway just read that and you’ll see he’s not really pro hwyte hahahaha. he apparently doesnt think french is hwyte. he’s french and sicilian and well we know sicilians arent hwyte but certainly french are!

talks about his single mother fooking black guys. HORREE SHEET. im surprised THEY didnt molest him! or at least beat him! so thats why he became an angry nihilistic incoherent druggie.

and the people who think hes a racist STILL think hes a racist!

i dont even hate the guy. he used to be my role model for angry tuff guy manly man shit. he was tuff and masculine, but there was no real weltanschauung there. just a man who was angry at everything and rambled incoherently hehehehe. except he fried his brain even MORE on drugs and alcohol and is even MORE incoherent when talking to people and now he apologizes for pseudo racist stuff when he’s too tuff to ever apologize for anythign else.

heh. but i wouldnt mind hanging out with him and telling him to quit MJ, to maybe have a child with a decent woman, that might straighten him up. not sure he would be able to discern a decent woman though. he was married to some jooish slut 15 years ago or so!!! if that didnt make him race aware, nothing will! damn!

i dont think hes a bad guy. but he should just have some damn kids and stop fooking around with metal for 45 year old losers.

although i like that he bitched about scott ian saying ian is never gonna say thank you for your dnation to the SPLC phil hahahahaha.

though i would have liked it better if anselmo had just said fook you joo, im not donating shit to those joos! dont try to shame me!

cuz ian had made a really JOOISH statement (yes hes a joo) saying you not donating is COMPLICITY!

his public apology wasnt good enough for these joos!

anyway, im sorry he was molested as a child. no child deserves that. that’s PROBABLY why he became such a misguided fookup and made fooktons of bad decisions and kinda wasted his potential and became sad and pathetic hahaha.

if he didnt hang out with a bunch of other druggies and losers maybe he could have had a healthy hwyte male role model in his life to teach him how to be a proud hwyte male. yet another product of single mothers! mudshark single mothers! and he doesnt think that is ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING that his own MOTHER was a MUDSHARK!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

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THE FINAL SOLUTION TO THE WQ

apr 29 2017 sheeeit

yeah you dont need to BEAT your waifu. probably dont even need to slap them. spanking them and occasionally being good and ruff during secs should be enough. basically just pounding them hard and somewhat pulling their hair.

i guess some/most/all women like to be slapped and choked during secs. i would say you could maybe put your hands around her neck like you were pretending to choke her but actually choking her just seems a little too weird. i guess i could envision some light slaps on the face perhaps, that would be less weird than choking. i dont see why simply spanking and ungently manhandling their body wouldnt be good enough. and pulling the hair is key.

the goal is to leave them absolutely QUIVERING when you are done.

then i wonder if you should mysteriously get up and leave shortly after. just disappear for like 10 or 15 minutes. make her feel alone and abandoned hahahaha. then when you mysteriously come back she develops attachment to you. assuming you want her to be attached to you hahahahaha. then you pull the dread game of pointing at the door and say, you never know, one day i might walk out that door and NEVER come back. so you better be on your best behavior, baby. dont make a fool out of me.

women should wear DRESSES that go PAST the knee and which go up to the damn neck. so many of womens clothes show off their tits or just a lot of chesty area near the tits, as if to say HEY LOOK AT MUH TITS. and then they complain about men staring at their tits. but really just wear a dress that doesnt have some “low cut neckline.” honestly. there is NO NEED for it. we dont NEED to see that much of your neck and chest. its INDECENT.

Image result for polish traditional dress

something like this would be fine. not even that fancy, that is probably a special occasions dress, but something simpler for every day stuff.im just talking in terms of covering your body without looking like a damn shitskin burka.

just look up polish traditional dress or russian traditional dress or german traditional dress or really any euro traditional dress! we already HAD the ideal solution 200 years ago!

i normally have a negative opinion of all women but she changed all that, she was special, she wasnt like other women, wawawawawawa. hahahaha. i felt positive about her. but she was really just another stupid woman, but i just dropped my guard because she was NICE to me!!!!!!!

well to be sure, i wasnt USED to women being NICE to me or wanting to spend TIME with me or having any interest in me!

i was always too indecisive with women. i would give them a choice of 2 or 3 places. you want to go here, here, or here. can’t make up your mind? fine, then we’ll go here.

does that count as Weak enough to drive a woman away? I mean I ultimately made the decision!

its just very confidence destroying when a woman leaves you exactly because she knows you want a real rel with her, and you’re not STRONG POWERFUL MAN enough for her to want a real rel with you.

ALL women want real rels, not just casual sex, but only with STRONG POWERFUL men. otherwise you get casual sexs a few times, fall in love with them, they think ew this weak man got feelings, stay away.

and they’re not wrong for wanting strong, powerful men!

i just regret not being strong and powerful enough to keep a woman around. they ALWAYS left me for being WEAK. should learn a lesson from that, eh?

heh. maybe because i hadnt bought and read MEIN K4MPF yet. it cant come soon enough! hopefully today.

but most 20 year old bois who pull women have not read mein k4mpf either. their masculinity just comes naturally. being An Athlete prob doesnt hurt! sportsball is jooish but lifting in the weight room certain is not! and there were plenty of lads in my high school weight room who liked to lift. i should have been in there with them.

maybe i should go to stormfront because they dont hate women as much as DS hahahaha.

heres a good quote I read on the purity spiral.com

QUOTE

I’ll come right out and say it here, anybody unilaterally condemning marriage may as well be getting a check from Shlomo T Shekelsburg for the work they’re doing. Advising caution is one thing. I would never suggest marrying a woman with a questionable past, problematic behaviors, or bad instincts.

That said, I’ve been married for about half a year to my wife. She’s religious, like me. Before we ever got engaged, I slowly introduced my views. We were talking over dinner last weekend when she asked how I came to my views. I explained my progression and she said she just wanted to know because she couldn’t put her finger on the precise moment she stopped being a “conservative catholic” and started being a radical traditionalist who is opposed to j00ry and minorities. Marriage, like all things in life, has ups and downs. It will not fix your life if it’s broken (and you will only attract bad women if that’s the case). It is not a cure-all. It requires work. That said, if you choose rightly, it’s the beginning of the fulfillment of what you were born to do: make a strong family.

Perhaps we need to roll out a “how to get happily married and start a family” guide.

There are a lot of j00ish lies that are blackpills regarding the lack of decent and chaste women out there. I’m convinced the librarian genre of porn exists for the purpose of convincing men that even modest and plain-dressed women are secret whores.

As for all this talk about all women being evil and there being no hope, finding a good woman takes work, dedication, and will demand more from you than you ever would have thought (part of the reason marriage is beneficial is because it will force you to improve, to the extent that the correct Christian view of marriage is that each spouse is participative in the ongoing purification and salvation of the other). As an old Irish proverb says, “unwillingness easily finds an excuse.” Building a family is hard, like most things in life worth your time and effort. Don’t believe anybody who tells you it’s impossible or wrong to try.

I read Anglin because he’s entertaining, insightful, and the alt-right media mogul with the most spine and integrity (between DS, TRS, and AR, not that they’re much competition). That said the white sharia shit is a meme. The thots will be shipped to monasteries in our glorious new nation.

END

thank you sir. i could prob get banned from posting stuff from there, but I mean it as good white pilling shit. that accepts women for what they are, no white nighting, yet no god damn woman hating, woman beating white sharia.  it was because i was getting tired of the anti-woman stuff at DS that I was like, welp, maybe I should check TPS (hehehehe) and see how they feel about the WQ. I think DS people, at least the BBS, go too far. we need something healthier than that.

another good quote i found re MGTOWS and the WQ: QUOTE

Arguably the MGTOWs just understand that they aren’t good enough to get a high quality woman and keep her in line.

And if their self assessment is correct, then it is more a matter of risk avoidance than hedonism. ENDQ

again i am not trying to infiltrate and subvert TPS. just trying to share anonymous pearls of wisdom I’ve found there. I am looking for winners and normies and well-balanced normie chads with wives and children, not a bunch of angry antisocial psychopath woman haters who are really lapping up AA’s WQ stuff. at least AA is very intelligent and convincing abotu it.

although i will prob be banned from purity spiral because i am too forgiving of mike enoch and trs. they are very very anti trs and enoch and anyone who is tolerant of trs.

welp maybe DS is what my level is then hahahaha. a bunch of woman hating losers who can only pull dirty negro fookin sluts because we ourselves are untermensch manlet loser mgtows.

hey wouldnt be the first time i was banned from somethign good because i wasnt good enough hahahaha. and then sent back to the bad company, saying welp this is your level.

NOPE! you always have the choice to be alone. better to be alone than in bad company. and i have gotten very used to being alone all the time that almost all company seems like bad company. but when i find something that is definitely good company, they def dont want anything to do with me hahahahaha.

i would get banned because i still listen to the fatherland. if you get your podcast promoted thru TRS then you get banned from TPS.  TPS also does not like “endless lurking.” welp not looking too good for me then hahaha.

oh well ill just keep being alone then. that kinda leads to a very mgtow anti-woman view though.

so why do i NOT want to be anti-woman so bad?

because its obviously BAD to be anti-woman!!!!!!!!!

i guess when i get banned from all pro hwyte forums i will start my own hahahaha.

so i am to pro-woman for DS, too pro-enoch for TPS, too anti-enoch for TRS, too anti-woman and young for stormfront hahaha, prob too young and pro-christian for vnn. i mean i really like the newer, 2.0 type orgs that actually have meetups, that actually influence stuff, that actually get readers, that are growing not shrinking.

no im not gonna get banned from DS hahahaha.  TPS yeah i prob would be. TRS i might be already. shit. TPS might ban me for NOT being banned from TRS!

hehehe when did this happen and why did i not hear about it until now

i guess the OPTICS of the pikeville thing today were not good, meaning they looked like a bunch of fat redneck slobs shouting white power.

redneck is fine, but people need to be NOT FAT, not dressed like SLOBS, and look halfway healthy. healthy families, neatly dressed husbands, wives, and children.

i dunno i havent seen any real pictures, just reading the DS thread after i guess the event in pikeville ended.

i mean i am skeptical about groups like NSM having Great Optics.

And I believe that Good Optics are important.

you have to LOOK like a group that everyone wants to join, including strong, successful, normal men and women.

but yeah anglin mentions white sharia and these guys jsut run with it. all white women are negro fooking whores, put them in burkas and make them our slaves.

even me, the bigass woman hater, doesnt believe we have to go this extreme.

yes we need an extreme solution to the extreme problem and that extreme solution is Traditional Family Values!!!!!

has actually been a hard year for The Movement. 6 months ago everyone was happy about trump and things were pretty positive. now its just black pill after black pill.

now some guy is making reasonable points on an anti-woman there but he will prob be shouted down because he joined only 2 days ago. which is USUALLY a bad sign but he IS making good points. namely, women are doing the same thing theyve always done. follow the crowd. if we throw out the j00 and change the culture, then the women will fall in line.

GLR had a healthy, good, nonhateful view of women in WP, and AH hopefully has one in MK.

MW had a good point as always. dont act like fooking THUGS. i guess peopel were saying hateful things when he had his talk with the libertardian nonwhites. i guess people were calling them negros and such in the comments and MW was disgusted. i am all for MW having Civil Discourse with whoever he wants. as he says, his goal is to appeal to the bystanders, the spectators, teh thousands of fans of these other people.

hey man im just trying to be social and talk to people online hahahaha. because every i know IRL is an alcoholic or a mudshark or a white hating shitlib or a race mixer or a degen hahaha. or they are too much of a winner to hang out with a loser like me. so i am pretty much doomed to be alone. and i can SORT OF take that. but god damn, that woman broke through that. made me realize what i was missing. and i still miss her! foooooooook. sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit. almost 2 years later.  she meant so much to me and means so little to the men who bang her and throw her away.

i think about cuddling with her, banging her, just being with her and being haaaaappy.

got to stop thinking these things.

but its normal to miss somebody you miss!

its all part of the PROCESS. TRUST THE PROCESS hahahaha. it takes a LONGGGGGG time.

maybe i should go back to despair forums. they are good people hehehe. there are just leftists and women and nonwhites and antiwhites on there hahahaha. i dont really care. its still a decent forum.

hell of a lot better than REDDIT. PURE cancer.

well spencer will soon have a forum up at altright.com hahahaha have to check that one out.

maybe i will get banned from TPS because I support MW hahahaha.

fooking stupid internet and alt right and pro hwyte movement hahahaha.

joo at slate says on pro tranny article: QUOTE

I think it’s harmful to tell a three year old that boys can’t have vaginas if that child is trans, and if they’re not it will lead them to have unnecessary trouble accepting trans people.

Boys can, in fact, have vaginas. There is no need to obscure this truth for children. ENDQ

this is the enemy. this is what they believe. this is how they talk.

shit. alcohol. i envy those who can do it without eventually developing a Drinking Problem. i sometimes wish i could start drinking again but the reality is, i might be more willign to do HERON than to drink ALCOHOL ever again. i am jsut DONE with alcohol, for better and worse!

apr 30

https://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/can-i-ask-you-guys-a-serious-personal-question/103010/

hooker story. guy wants to Help The Poor White Hooker he banged last night who was GORGEOUS hehehehe.

was thinking about That Woman last night and how it was normal to grieve for someone you had lost. you have a HOLE IN YOUR HEART. but for HOW LONG?

And YES while its always been a problem for me to create a Fantasy Version of somebody, and then grieve for that, when I really didn’t know the real person as well as i thought I did…..I knew That Woman more than I knew other women. Although I still DID have a fantasy version too. but I knew her True Self pretty substantially, I think.

And I thought if I came back, strong and decisive and powerful, I would have a decent chance at winning her back. these women dont know what the fook they want, all they know is strength and power. but a. i prob couldnt muster that strength, and b. it STILL wouldnt be a GOOD idea because i should really aim higher than a fatherless white trash mudshark, no matter how qt or nice or low-number she is. WAS.

remember how shocked i was when she told me a big secret back in the day. it shattered my image of her. like i cant believe this is the same person. yeah well think about that times 600000000000000 gorillion. plus even worse now that my image of her is frozen in time, yet she’s out there getting older, sleazier, trashier, uglier in her soul hahahaha. more cox, more negro cox, more bad bad bad shit. that i should want no part of. BEGONE, FOUL TEMPTRESS!!!!!!! not that shes even tempting me hahahaha.

but yeah. you lose an important person, its like death, you grieve for a long time. you never really stop hahahaha.

ARRANGED MARRIAGES. this is the way to go. marry the women young. still not sure if the guy should be same age, or about 23. i think either or would work. how about 20 year old guys married to 16 year old gurls. i think 16 or 17 at the OLDEST would be idea for the women.

i am NOT joking.

because 15 and 16 year old gurls are HORNY to FOOK, and they will sneak out and fook negros and arabs if their a. weak fathers let them or b. their strong fathers physically restrain them, the women will rebel spitefully.

the best solution is to have the strong father arrange a marriage at age 16 with a Decent Young White Man and then the daughter can fook him 10 times a day. that would PROBABLY make the young man happy too, hahahahahahahahaha.

i think AH advised a similar thing in MK as well. not sure how specific he was, but he did advised arranged marriages when the woman was young.

no burkas, just traditional european dress covering the chest, tits, ass, and legs. in the past they had a thing called MODESTY. DECENCY.

and thats it folks. do that and you have no more dirty sluts and “thots” and you will have broken the joo stranglehold on the cultcha. hehehe. this is what i HOPE people really mean by “white sharia”, or at least what MY functional definition of what I’d like white sharia to be. stop doubling down on this god damn sharia word hahahaha. just say ARRANGED MARRIAGES.

i would rather have the ability to occasionally bang degenerate hwite sluts, than to be an Incel Virgin MGTOW who cant even pull sluts. i would promise not to bang a slut more than…..once every 3 months hahahaha. and i would try to use these skills towards finding a young, low-number woman, and then LOCKING HER DOWN in a traditional, monog, child bearing marriage. i would also train her in the ways of loving tradition and hating the modern jooish world.

you probably SHOULD try to Isolate them from their friends because their friends are shitty degenerates who encourage them to be negro fooking sluts, cheaters, and horrible people!

of course “social isolation” is now considered “emotional/psychological ABUSE”.

kinda wish i could go back to the women from 10 years ago and use them as “fook buddies”. just bang them in degen ways and cuddle with them and if i said i didnt want a rel, then they probably would want a rel. but a rational man would not want a rel with these sluts.

still having a fook buddy is prob better than going to HOOKERS…….right?

i would think the avg hooker is even more MENTAL than these women were.

maybe i should contact That Woman and see if she wants to be fook buddy. and nothing more. nope i dont have feelings for you any more. just want to use you like tinder trash baby, isnt that what you want? fook no i wont fook you raw dog because i know you fook negros, ya dirty whore! how stupid do you think I am? how stupid are YOU, ya stupid whore? ok im leaving now! i might never come back!

heh. i would be better off finding a brand new woman to treat like a dirty whore like that. and there are plenty of them in a local area on tinder and okcupid.

your father must be so proud that you are tinder trash, fooking guys on the 3rd date, fooking negros, hundreds of guys have seen your n00dz. YOUR FATHER MUST BE SO PROUD.

or he is a fat white trash slob on pain pills and jerking off to porn and doesnt care that his daughter has become a slut. oh well. not my problem. i tried. ive got my own problems. shes a big gurl now, she can make her own mistakes. so the gurls a damn negro fooking slut, welp i tried my best, lets just accept reality now. while i become a terrible drunk or pill popper or disgusting fat slob or wife beater or some other form of horrible white trash. i guarantee it. sad!

hehehehehehehe

can taking lithium if you are not actually bipolar be hurtful? possibly helpful? like you take it because you MIGHT be bipolar but not sure?

hey ill be the FIRST to admit i am NOT RATIONAL at ALL. I am EMOTIONAL as FOOK. ALL THE TIME. like a damn WOMAN. it SUCKS. and therefore every damn decision I make is COMPROMISED by Emotion.

https://www.youtubeDOTcom/watch?v=Gqd6hBISb9w

oh dear god

the video is jooish cancer, the comments are jooish cancer, i shouldnt even HAVE it here.  to see all these incel mgtows commenting “I CANT WAIT TO DIVORCE MY HORRIBLE FEMINAZI FAT WIFE AND GET ONE OF THESE CREEPY ROBOTZ!!!! MGTOW 4 LYFE! WITH DOLLS LIKE THIS AND ARTIFICIAL WOMBS, TECHNOLOGY HAS MADE MODERN WOMEN OBSOLETE!!!!”

thing is, these mgtow incels arent joking. they would LUV one of these jooish dolls.

i mean that is real woman hate i think. to me this is more “extreme” than hwyte power. or hwyte sharia.  and 6 gorillion times more ridiculous!

like they literally sound like paid jooish shills. i cant wait to divorce my fat nag wife and get one of these? youre lucky your fat nag wife hasnt divorced YOU and shook you down!

the sad thing is 20 year old autistic hwyte virgin men who see this and thing this is a good idea because theyve given up on women at such a young age!

the dolls had decent bodies though. i guess i would bang one just to say i did. but its just SO WEIRD. i hope i never get to the point where this does not seem weird. but yeah i can’t pull a real woman as hot as these rubber DOLLS. good god.

AND LOOK AT THE FOOKING DEGENERATES WHO MAKE THESE DOLLS AND RUN THE COMPANY. the workers are total degen white atheists libertardian pansexuals, the owner is a Mincing little Joo.

I WONDER WHO COULD BE BEHIND THIS?????

its sad and infuriating to think a lot of young whyte men think this is SUCH a great idea. for a while I was mgtow and i was probably more open to Dolls then, same way I was more open to Porn, in that, oh, you get all the good aspects of women and none of the bad! live life on your own terms! dont be a slave to the pvssy! go your own way goy!

but it is kinda funny watching the “roasties” freak out about it. but i kinda freak out about it too. but would it force women to behave better, if a DOLL gave actual realistic COMPETITION!

well, i think alphas would continue to bang women as they always have; and the only people who would use these dolls are huge creeps like the ones who are interested in them now. i mean the avg person cant afford 15k for a doll. i am sure they will have financing though hahahaha.

also i think most betas would still prefer a real person to a damn piece of rubber. even if the rubber is “hotter.”  how can you not ALWAYS be aware of it being FAKE? how is that not a dealbreaker? have you NEVER TOUCHED a REAL woman?

IMHO it just shows how jooish MGTOW is. and these mgtows dont care about race or joos. a lot of mgtows are black and nonwhite.

a black guy that cant pull black sluts. that is really pathetic hahahaha. i could probably pull fooking BLACK sluts hahahaha.

i guarantee sleazy strip clubs would buy a couple of these and rent them out to guys so you could just pay 20 bucks and fook the doll and they would supposedly wash it afterwards. yeah right.

how much would they charge to fook the communal doll? i imagine there would be laws and shit. its just unsanitary.

also its degenerate and jooish. these guys are such fedora, libertarian, amoral, atheist, neckbeard, gaming phaggots.

i would rather be an incel virgin the rest of my life than bang one of degen jooish dolls.

well thats not true, i already said i’d bang one hahahahaha.

i dont want to meet new women! its terrible because they are ANNOYING, stupid, and slutty! everything they say and do is annoying as fook!

but you have to show your annoyance in the right way in order to get these sluts to fook hahaha.

i dont luv contributing to hwyte women beign sluts, but if theyre ALREADY SLUTS from having fooked 20 guys, then i could probably IMPROVE them by banging them with a huge hakenkreuz drawn on muh chest and then implanting pro-hwyte slogans into her as i banged her like a real man.

maybe i can make her a better woman for the beta male she settles down with hahahaha. but i dont want to settle down with a woman whos already been with 20 guys.

well maybe if she is young and qt tho hahaha. and has no prior kids. then i could train her into being a good woman and not womaning me over hahaha.

i mean if the woman is loyal to you and is young and qt and has no previosu kids, what does it matter if shes taken 5, 10, or 20 cox.

heh well it does matter hahahaha. but i would probably give her a pass just because im no huge winner either. and if she were truly young, qt, no kids, and loyal, really thats more than i can ask for. only way i could pull that is if shed been with 100 guys!

i should watch this. pro white boers in SA with a symbol that looks liek a you know what hahaha and they “had the chance” to save themselves but now the hwytes in SA are getting GENOCIDED. ALL these hwytes should get legit refugee status in the US.

i guess he was too friendly with the blacks and then some blacks hacked him to death with machetes.

 

LOW NUMBER, GOOD FATHER

apr 22

well met with the old friend and thank GOD he was on good behavior yesterday and did not drink at all. not at all. not before i arrived, i didnt have to blow into his breathalyzer, he didnt drink at dinner, didn’t drink afterwards, so, i got everything i had hoped for. when he doesnt drink and is a normal person like this, then i dont MIND hanging out with him! maybe he went and pounded vodka right after i left. but hopefully not. and i would almost be able to tolerate that, as long as i didnt see it. not that that would be good.

as a kind of bonus i tried to Red Pill him on Porn because he watches too much of that. I gently explained how it can warp your mind in ways you dont even realize. who is making this? WHY are they makign this? is it NORMAL for women to stuff huge things up their ass? do normal women do that? do normal men want to see that? did you always want to see that when you were like 13 years old? i stopped watching porn and it is the best decision I ever made. how about lets just do a fun experiment here and you try to stop for 30 days and see what happens.

oh hell no, not 30 days, i dont want to do that.

well why not? why would that be so bad? 30 days without porn, is it really that hard? why do you want to watch it so bad? isnt that interesting? is that normal? is that the way humans should be? who benefits from turning us into weird perverts?

ok, how about a week then. can you try one week for me.

i tried to sell him on one week. dont think it will work but if i can get him to think of the joo rubbing his hands saying GOOD GOYIM, then thats a victory for me. I explained that image and told him to think of that next time he wants to look at porn, which is like every fooking day.

do you really need to look at porn every day? every WEEK?

really once you stop for a month, you dont WANT to look at it any more. youre like this is gross and wrong, this is turning me into a jooish pervert. this is bad. TURN THAT SHIT OFF.

and you WILL SEE some porn eventually, inevitably, on the internet, or from these fooking GOYS who are watching porn every day. he talks about all the 40 year men at his job who are always watching porn and talking about secs.

im like wow, these are 40 year old white men. do you really think thats normal? dont they have CHILDREN? would you want your DAUGHTER doing porn, or being a hooker, or a stripper, or working at hooters, or even just being a basic slut??? would you really not care?

yeah but i dont have a daughter and I dont want to have kids.

well imagine you DID have a daughter. and then we can Explore why you dont want to have kids.

because its no benefit to me, plus the world sucks. which is basically shorthand for saying i don’t believe I can raise winner kids in such a sucky world. which is fair enough. I dont think I could either. not least of all because I cant even take care of MYSELF, how could I take care of a wife and children.

maybe spending more time withe white babies would help him.

not that i needed to spend time with white babies to come to the conclusion that having hwyte babies is a great thing.

anyway i was just thrilled he was not drinking. I heavily suggested that it also doesnt do him or anyone else any good to be raging falling down drunk.

so, all in all, better than expected! thank GOD!

he is also somewhat redpillable because he doesnt like blacks and race mixing hahahaha. so i jumped on those topics. but really tried to make the porn connection.

when you are watching porn almost every day, you think its NORMAL. you cant see how FOOKED UP it is! just another thing which makes it SOOOOOOOOO terrible!

oh im just a prude. well kind of yes. but what the fook is a PRUDE anyway. anyone short of being a total pornified jooish pervert? then we SHOULD ALL BE PRUDES.

ok its one thing when omega virgins watch porn and cant talk to gurls. WHAT ABOUT MARRIED GUYS or guys in a monog rel? like muh porn watching friend. he is married, his wife totally knows he watches porn, im sure shes not thrilled with it, but she just accepts it as normal and doesnt think its a huge deal because hes not watching 10 hours of porn a day.

sad! and i think a lot of women think the same way. oh, ALL GUYS JUST WATCH PORN. ACCEPT IT. its not worth getting mad about.

heh. that is not the proper attitude. although i wish they took that laiisez faire, im not going to overreact attitude with other things that they tend to overreact on, like everyhting hahahaha.

so youre a 40 year old man and still have SOME secs drive. but your wife is a fat slob that you dread having to bang once a month like al bundy. (but his wife was attractive!!!! (but i think also a jooess.))

probably some of these wives are like, yeah i know im fat and gross, and i just cant compete with these hot 20 year old gurls in porn, so, whatever, just look the other way.

im talking full blown working class whyte people here. the ones that work for a living and arent pill popping single parent household trash, but people who struggle every day to make barely enough money, have wives who get fat, and kids that turn white trash just because their father is working 60 hours a week and doesnt have TIME to lead his home.

well then i say he should drop down to 40 hours a week and spend 20 more hours a week leading his home, and just save money elsewhere. no cable, no expensive pickup trucks and suv’s, no eating at restaurants, move into a hwyte pride single wide in a rural area.

but what if you have medical problems and thats why you have to work 60 hours a week and be an Absent Father?

I say when your work INTERFERES with you being a good father….then change your work. you have to work 40 hours because thats the rule. But I would say not a SECOND more if it interferes with the time you spend with your FAMILY.

dont slave away working 80 hours a week saying your doing it for your family. i know you believe it too! its a jooish LIE! youve been DUPED! you would be worth more to your family in the long run to spend that time with them, and not at work. just make less money and make your kids wear used clothes. this will keep your daughters from become strippers, sluts and mudsharks, and your sons from being neet white  trash pill popping phaggot loser deadbeats! white trash, in short!

ok LIFE is inherently competitive, there are winners and losers. this is why WE need to be competitive, despite what they tell you in joo school. schjool hahahaha. tell all the kids to not be competitive so they can all be losers in the real world.

so what about decent, fair, hwyte Productive Enterprise? in contrast to scamming, lying, cheating, exploiting Jooish Capitalism? Yes, Hwyte Productive Enterprise is ALSO competitive. There are also winners and losers.

its not inherently nonwhite or jooish to be competitive or to have winners and losers in other words. even in an all hwyte country there would be winners and losers and that would be natural and normal and nothing wrong with that.

spencer in his auburn speech said “THE STRENGTH OF THE WOLF IS IN THE PACK; THE STRENGTH OF THE PACK IS IN THE WOLF” which i’m not sure who said that first.

it was a good speech, do recommend. would have liekd more out of mike enoch.

now azzmador is getting very black pilled. he says theres no demand for his work because nobodys donating to his show. 40000 downloads and only 6 bucks in donations in the past month. and i was 5 bucks of that hahahahahahahahaha.

i think he might be bipolar but he is still a great man. i hope he cools off and comes back.

i think most people would gladly pay like 25 cents to download, but thats just really hard to arrange.

this huge “woman hater” on DS says you can turn even “nice gurls” into huge sluts by just asking them to touch your D. then say how bout giving the tip a nice little kiss. then next thing you know shes gobbling the knob, which are “womens little white lies” in that they dont count for anything, they dont MEAN anything, oh theyve only FOOKED 37 guys, but theyve SUCKED HUNDREDS.

well if its so easy to get them to suck, and so easy to convert the BJ to full blown fooking, how come they havent FOOKED hundreds of guys too? if its so EASY to convert a BJ to fooking? something doesnt make sense there. but i do really like the guys baby steps approach. i just wish women werent such big sluts. he says just make women suck you for doing small favors like driving them somewhere, teaching them english, buying them lunch, etc.

show them that you know that they suck guys as a form of CURRENCY. youre WISE TO THEIR SCHEME, and now YOU WANT IN! saying the whole thing with an Alpha SMIRK, like you cant fool me, ya little slut. now blow me. come on. just the tip.

he says average white guys bang around 20 gurls by their late 20s. betas bang 1 or 2 or 0. alphas bang 70 or more.

great thread. tried to download whole thing, cant figur eout how. here are some choice quotes:

INSANELY LONG STRING OF IMPORTANT QUOTES

guy1:
I remember when I was 27, just got my first IT job.

I walked around in my dockers and button down shirt and had a “real job” for the first time in my life. I was finally ready to meet a wife and settle down now that I had a stable job. lol

It was like f00king kryptonite, no 19 year old woman or any woman for that matter wanted to date me.

Took me a while to realize, yeah women like men with jobs but you have to make WAAAAAY more than her for it to matter.

Before that I was a musician who bilked institutions out of shitloads of money to buy practice time. I got WAY more female attention, even from “good” girls.. lol

Now I’m older and especially today my lifestyle is impressive to them simply because it is out of reach for someone their age.

 

guy2:
The White men have no chance with that little whore generally because they’re beta cucks who don’t know what they’re doing.

But if we have white Sharia, none of that will matter.
Core message there is not giving a shit if you impress some jumped up piece of ass.

The less you care the smoother the sailing.

guy1:
Well also women have different standards than men.

You’d have to either be top of the pile or bottom of the pile. lol

Either a ken doll with comparable genetics and a massive income/bad boy status or a f00king refugee from Africa. lol
Yes, I find that to be true.

When you get older you naturally care less so it’s kind of like “wait, he’s not trying to f00k me”. lol

Or she starts acting like a bitch and you make fun of her voice and shit and she ends up laughing. Before i might have got mad and stormed off or got embarrassed.

A lot of young guys don’t have that kind of game yet, they don’t know how to handle an annoying bitch in a positive way.

I think it’s just harder to not care in your twenties unless you’re killing it already.

Definitely personality is a huge part of attraction and you just get all that experience dealing with difficult people over the course of your lifetime.

guy2:
Well when your aspirations and ego is caught up in a woman’s attention, you’re f00ked.
That said you will still need to chase a female at least in the very beginning by talking to the dumb whore and f00king her etc.

Then you can coast.

This is why musicians get pvssy, they’re in high visibility situations where the sluts approach them.

And women love music because it panders to their meaningless abstract emotional pea brains.
So they already feel an emotional connection to the musician.

guy1:
The thing with women, especially the better looking ones…

If there’s anything even slightly “off” about your personality and you’re not super good looking…adios. It’s really brutal. lol

And a lot of people of the newer generations..some of them are great to talk to but some of them just get really awkward.

Like there will be a pause and I’ve had some of them just kind of run away because they got anxious. They play so many video games they’re sort of autistic.

Bad social skills will tank you with women. I even have a list of mannerisms to avoid like putting your hands in your pockets and shaking your leg…I used to get rejected all the time until I fixed them one by one.

Every woman I’ve ever dated got pissed at me if I put my hands in my pants pockets. lol

guy2:
If you can’t eye f00k them and hold the tension with controlled paced speech and allow pregnant pauses…. Then you’re f00ked.

Thing is, all these Casanova arts are irrelevant if we have white Sharia law.

guy1:
Yeah just brutal directness and knowing when and how.

At this point in life I’m confident to say to any woman I know reasonably well that I would like to f0ck them or have them watch me masturbate. I’ll detail everything I want to do to them with a smile while they look absolutely shocked. lol

Actually I’ve never had a woman turn that down. If they turned down sex I’d say “well I’d like you to watch me, I think that’s fair” and she’d say “ok”. While she’s watching me I’d make sure she at least touches it, squeeze her boobs and anything else I can get away with. lol

A couple weeks later after watching me she’d call and we’d meet up and it would happen. I’ve done that a lot, it’s pretty easy.

She thinks it’s ok to watch but she doesn’t realize she’s getting slow boiled, females are very susceptible to this. Get your foot in the door and it opens easily.

Once she’s seen me naked and she’s touched it and had my hands all over her there’s little point in resisting and we are no longer just friends.

If I got resistance I say things like…

Well I think you should watch, that’s really the least you can do…

No, I think that’s more than fair…I must say I really do.

That’s fine if you don’t, I’m just saying I want to…(more graphic descriptions of ravishing)

It’s so funny that this shit works…anyway that’s why everything is so f00ked up.
Basically in a nutshell kids, sexual harrassment absolutely f00king works.

That’s why it’s illegal for white men only.

Ever noticed that? lol
There was this blonde bitch I worked with.

When she worked at my company I never made a move even though I knew she liked me.

As soon as she got canned I showed her my coch and banged her and it started with making her watch me whack off exactly as I described it.

She wanted me to do something for her so I said, “well I have something I want you to do for me”.
Also if there is a girl by the side of the road or stranded at a gas station…this happened a lot in Florida.

Girls would ask me for gas money, help moving or all sorts of dumb shit they can’t do themselves.

I’d say, sure but I want a quick BJ. Same deal. lol

And if you want to marry her you can just give her your phone number, there’s no such thing as dating anymore. lol

But who wants to marry these sluts, that’s the thing.
I’m not getting likes on this because most men don’t want to believe it but it’s true.

When you talk the way I described, they stop putting on the act because they know you know the real deal. You’re not some sucker they an screw around with, they know that I know they’ve done this shit before.

These are not freakish women either, they’re ordinary kinds of women a normal man will date.

But I will never date them unless they can do something for me like clean my house or make me dinner, give me money, etc.

And I certainly would not sacrifice my freedom to get children from their diseased wombs and kiss their herpes ridden mouths. lol
The realization that most women will pay for basic services with sex is the ultimate red pill.

In Brazil, guys who teach english will tell you the girls over there will offer to f00k you for English lessons rather than pay. It’s not so much that they don’t have the money, they like sex and if they think you’re cute at all (esp if you are white American) they will gladly f00k you.

Women in Brazil or anywhere in SA are actually incredibly f00king easy for Americans…also in their culture it’s normal to just f0ck all the time. lol

Sometimes if I really wanted someone and they wouldn’t budge, I’d just offer them money. I’d say look I know you’re not that into me but I’ll give you $1000 and I’ll never tell anyone I promise.

Yup.

guy2:
Never do a female “friend” favours without at least getting a blowjob in the exchange.
Very true.

Blowjobs to women are like little White lies, usually in their mind they rationalise it as not counting as sex.

Always get women to give you blowjobs, this is not a sex preference thing, this is a understanding women thing!

 

another

The funniest sex story I have that illustrates your point is this girl I’d been on a couple of dates with.

Very immature, very shy, very scared at the idea of f0cking etc etc, kept using her Female friend as an excuse not to be alone with me.

Finally got her alone in my car, had given her and a friend a lift somewhere.

Kept my little whore in the car to say goodnight etc, the friend has left, drive the car around the corner into an alley. Middle of The night.

Kissing leads to heavy petting, I go for a blowjob, she’s very self conscious, won’t do it.

So I pull it out, hard, start jerking it off in front of her face.

Then my favourite line of all time gets used….

“Baby, just kiss the tip, just once and I’ll stop….”

Anyway, she kissed the tip, did a lot more and swallowed a load.

Moral of the story, women work with a gradual breakdown of resistance, small victories lead to winning the war.

later:

The average normal white guy has f0cked around 10 to 20 girls by the time he’s in his late twenties.

Extreme betas are virgins or limping on one or two sexual experiences in their twenties

Then you have sexual alphas who will have f0cked anywhere between 70 to 300 girls.

Then you have sodomites who will generally have f0cked anywhere between 500 to 3000 men by middle age.

Negros are known to have high std rates as they f0ck quickly and frequently with strangers.

Sorry I don’t​have the J00ish sources for the academia f4gs out there. I have a brain and life experience instead.

OK THE END

I have tried to protect their anonymity by changing their forum names haha.

that was some of the best red pilling on the WQ ive seen in a long time. now those might be the two most “woman hating” guys on the bbs, even moreso than anglin himself. i read their shit and i say, DEAR GAWD, i really really really really really hope not all women are like that!

then we could assume the average 27 year old woman has been with 25 guys!!!!!!!!

i wonder if these tactics would scare the TRULY good women away. that the second you pull your D out, they say fook you you negro pervert and LEAVE. not be all COY and shit.  THAT would be the only way for the woman to pass this test.

but yeah i copied and pasted so much because there was THAT much worth copying and pasting between these two gentlemen today hahaha. so i thank them for their great talk. i am not trying to shame them. i am trying to THANK them!

adolf clapping.gif

besides there is word of many threads disappearing from the forum. im sure mods are deleting some but ive also heard the hardware just cant HANDLE all the traffic and action and shit just gets corrupted and not backed up, its unbackupable or something, even weev cant figure it out because he’s not good with rails and docker and god knows what other bullshit tech. this is why i hate technology as ted kaczynski did. weev made the analogy of its like asking a russian literature phd, you’re an expert in language and lingustics, can you translate this spanish thing.

that even a super smart guy like WEEV would be as about as useful as ME just because he doesnt know RAILS. well, thats where I am on EVERY language.

and then the computer fooks up and its impossible to fix it, and even MORE impossible to determine WHY it fooked up. computers and tech are SO COMPLEX you literally need a phd to make even a LITTLE sense out of one type of computer. ITS NOT WORF IT.

this is partially what led me to Give Up on “IT” and Programming Courses and Computer Science. the shit will drive you literally insane. in a way computers are just as jooish, evil, and crazy as women hahahahaha.

lesson: i guess become a diff type of engineer. i’d lean towards mechanical. but if you live near a lot of oil, try chemical. also mechanical would be good there.

actually, just do mechanical because robots are just gonna be more and more important. automation goy! MACHINES.

but yeah. i would not want to marry a woman who pretends to be all innocent, and then she falls for the Pushing Thru Resistance, Just The Tip bullshit. and has done that with 20 guys. do you want to marry a woman who has fooked or even just sucked 20 guys?

makes me sad abotu That Woman, because she used to be truly innocent. but now i could totally see her pulling that coy bullshit as she quickly increases her number from 2 to 20 over just a few short years. DISGUSTING!

oh well its her life to fook up, she didnt have a good father, SHE DIDNT HAVE A CHANCE. SAD!

but i had nothing BUT chances: good family, ok education, decent friends. so I MUST have been a bad seed! well, i wasnt TOUGH. and i got too into alcohol and MJ from a young age.

bla bla bla weve heard this all before.

chicken wings might be a miracle food. not terribly hi cal, and very high in protein. less calories than beef. although beef is still pretty miraculous!

but yeah. married and LTR men who look at porn regularly and both man and his woman think this is perfectly normal, because all men look at porn regularly. this is a fooking serious problem that is maybe 14th on the list of other very serious problems hahaha but its one that is in my bailiwick hahaha.

yeah but its not STOPPING these men from having hwyte children, so…..its NOT really serious then?

(many of these men have hwyte children.)

uhhh well i would say it is def harming their rel with their wife, and possibly harming their skills as father. do you think the ideal father is beating off to 18 year old gurls 3 times a week?

i mean im sorta glad these men still have any secs drive.

but i think some of them dont really have a secs drive, they just “like looking” at porn and they ARENT EVEN BEATING OFF TO IT. just ogling and gazing and staring at it. this might be even WORSE than jerking off to it!

i mean what do NORMAL PEOPLE do?  i dont even know! i dont know many normal people! Normies! my porn watching friend is def not normal. I am not normal. he talks about his tuff guy male work mates who are all watching porn.

are they really ALL watching porn, or do the porn watchers just talk about porn with each other?

i really hate to think its NORMAL for All Normal Men to watch porn.

the two men i work with are very normie and very respectable. you think THEY watch porn? I would think they DONT!

and if they do, i imagine they would feel ASHAMED about it, as they SHOULD, and they prob wouldnt do that more than like once every couple months at most.

but these are men in their 40s and 50s. i am more concerned with the porn viewing of men in their 20s and 30s.

well i mean if 40 year old men are using porn regularly, thats obviously not good. its prob worse, becuase at that age, they should KNOW BETTER.

ever try explaining to an enthusiastic porn user why they shouldnt use porn? for you, its OBVIOUS. for THEM, its equally obvious – why WOULDNT you want to see hot young gurls doing really hot shit??!?! and wouldnt you like to be the LUCKY GUY fooking that crazy hawt tattooed suicide gurl in the ass hahaha.

porn makes you think stuff is HOT that you SHOULDNT THINK IS HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! stuff that you say, damn, thats PERVERTED, no thank you.

but now obviously, all fetishes are perfectly OK as long as everybody CONSENTS.

absolutely porn is all a part of that. NORMALIZING PERVERSION.

dont call it a FETISH, call it PERVERSION. ABOMINATION. be ashamed, be very ashamed.

i mean ill probably always have my own perversion of wanting ot bang gurls in the ass. if i had a gf i would probably try to bang her in the ass. i def wanted to bang That Woman in the ass. i dont think this is gonna go away. but really im just happy as long as im not watching perverted porn on the topic. i mean i havent intentionally watched porn in well over a year. sought it out for the purposes of looking at it for at least 10 solid minutes and jerking off.

so its hard to put myself back in the mindset of someone who does just that several times a week! i dont want to be in that mindset! but its good that understand the people Im trying to help hahaha.

 

IF HAVING SECS IS EASIER THAN COMMUNICATING, THEN WHAT ELSE IS EASIER THAN COMMUNICATING?

sat sept 2

sheeeeeit MIGHT go to the fitness place today. saturday afternoon. its gonna be busy. theres gonna be arabs right next to me on the treadmill chanting, singing, praying, talking loudly in arabic. having loud annoying obnoxious phone conversations with other arabs. hehehehehe. arabs are fooking OBNOXIOUS. if they acted more like whites I wouldnt dislike them as much. white are generally not this obnoxious. in general. on average. they can still be plenty obnoxious. but i give them a little break because they are my people. there’s a race war on right now. every time a white becomes white trash, schlomo rubs his hands. and 95% of people dont know the JQ, so they just dont KNOW any better, and ignorance kind of IS a valid excuse.

anyway i would just go for 1 hour, use the treadmill, try to slowjog for 1 mile tops, listen to music and podcasts.

saturday afternoon. bet that woman is waking up next to her new boifran, all happy after being fooked hard and smoking tons of MJ hehehehe. good riddance. i still want her hahaha.

but i accept that will never ever ever ever happen. 100%. yearning for MJ is a much more realistic, doable thing. so i yearn for that equally hehe. this is really because i am socially inept. i literally don’t know anyone who can get me MJ, and i dont have the balls to seek people out. I asked the one person i could possibly ask, and that was a no unfortuantely.

i bet i could ask a bunch of people at planet fatness. all the arabs and albanians, a bunch of them def sell drvgs hehehehe. but i wouldnt trust them to give me a fair deal or to get what i really want (medium quality 1nd1c4 at a medium level price. medium, not high. medium is good enough for me, that i dont need to pay a premium for HIGH quality. medium is MORE than good enough, or at least it used to be, and i THINK it still would be.)

so yeah might do that at 1 o clock. but it will prob be busay at that time.

anyway. a few months ago the thought of her fooking and luving her new bf would have made me a lot more upset. and i would have wanted HER a lot more than i wanted MJ. but now they’re about equal hahahaha. i might even want MJ more hehehe.

granted, i dont want to RUMINATE or LINGER on the thoughts of her loving getting fooked and doing all sorts of degen with her new BFs. or just a string of casual guys.

and im just as more likely to get butthurt at HOW CAN SUCH A DEGEN MAKE SO MUCH MORE MONEY THAN ME AND BE SO MUCH MORE SUCCESSFUL AT ADULTING THAN ME.

yet she has no idea of The Arc Of History. No idea how Relationships Work. Is like a Baby with a Gun. Doesn’t understand her Reproductive Role and the Responsibilities that go with it. Doesn’t know how to communicate.

WRONG. she just didnt WANT to do any of that with ME. but with a SECSY masculine man, she was MORE than WILLING to do all of those things.

willing to hang out, willing to communicate, willing to sacrifice, willing to put herself out on the line, willing to go all in or even just half in, hahaha. willing to talk, willing to listen, willing to put yourself in the other persons shoes, willing to work, willing to make an effort, willing to change, willing to compromise. willing to go to a relship shrink hahaha. willing to end the rel in a sympathetic way.

willingness is SO important.

anyway im done with her waaaaaaaaaa i accept that,  and i have finally found somewhat of a job after Much Struggle, so…..i just want to buy a bag of MJ at a fair price plus maybe 15% tip/premium/finders fee hahahaha. maybe 20%. fine 20%. buy a 100$ dollar thing for 120$. buy a 150$ thing for 180$. COME ON. how can you turn that down.

later.

well i did go to fatclub. used treadmill for 65 minutes. burned 426 calkories. it was surprisingly not too busy. didnt have to wait. there was a qt white girl near me wearing extremely tight pants that were painted on her ass. after a few minutes another qt white gurl got in front of me with extremely tight pants. this is just fooking NORMAL and they dont KNOW how SLUTTY it looks! they LOOK like theyve fooked 20+ guys, when they’ve really only fooked 10! it’s not fair to them hahahahahahahaha

yes there were some swarthy arabs and turks in there, pretty high percentage unfort, BUT on the whol the place was NOT packed, and that was my main concern. have not been there in like 7 months.

but yeah if a woman fooks 20 guys and doesnt even know their names, then yeah you are entitled to feel a little butthurt when she doesnt fook you. ok so you might not have the best of intentions but i GUARANTEE you have better intentions, on average, than some of the Tough Guys she fooks! they dont give a damn who they hurt! you at least would abide by the campsite rule! leave em as good as you found em! (tech its “leave em better than you found em.” little generous. my version is, leave em as good as you found em.

youre just lookin for some secs, you’re not trying to screw anyone over or lie to anyone. no lying or cheating or douchebaggery. just slam bam thank ya mam. i mean shit. if youre not an experienced chad normie thundercock, you’ll prob end up getting feelings for any qt gurl who fooks you even if you set out to NOT get feelings and just have casual secs like she does.

but yeah. did a slow jog at 5 mph for 1 mile. so that took 12 minutes. pathetic hahahaha. then “rested” for 5 minutes or so, then started focusing on incline, keeping it at 3.0 mph. the incline did not seem super hard until after like 8 degrees. it goes up to 15 max which is darn steep. i think i always had it on 1.0 because that is a good simulation of real life.

these women. secs. yeah. its FUN to them, but MEANINGLESS fun. like JERKING OFF is for you. when you watched porn, you didnt think of those porno whores as PEOPLE. that might make it more uncomfortable. well, normie staceys dont think of the chads they fook as people either. just pornography, this is their version of porn. and god forbid they ever confuse YOU with one of those fookable chads and you get lucky once.

you will feel wow this is so special, she will think wow this is fun, but i hope he doesnt get feelings, doesnt he understand what casual fun is? this is just chill fun. dont get feelings. its just sex. if he gets clingy, im dumping him. i dont need that.

so yeah i guess i resented women for being able to feel that way about sex. about PEOPLE.

believe me, if i were actually fooking the girls in the pornos, it would be alot easier to view them as PEOPLE. you have a sweaty naked body there staring you in the eyes, being all sweaty and stinky. how can you NOT see them as a person. a fellow human being. DAMN.

i was thinking, well, how many good friends have i had during my life. this is how close you should get to someone before you have SECS with them. get as close to them as you would a Good, Top Tier Platonic friend.

So how many of those have I had? quite a few, actually.

2 in grade school, maybe 3;

3 from high school;

a bunch during college. 6 or 7 or 8.

(so therefore we should expect that the normal woman has 8 secs partners during college. because I had 8 decent friends during that time.)

a couple after college, including That Woman because we were good friends before the shit happened. maybe 3 or 4.

so, maximum of 3 + 3 + 8 + 4 by age…..30 ehehehe. THEREFORE, its ok for women to have a max of EIGHTEEN sex partners before age 30.

yeah but i didnt have secs with ANY of these people hahahahaha.

ok lets say 17, because one of the grade school friends, i wasnt really friends with him any more by the time i Hit Puberty, ie, when people really want to become Sexually Active. Start noticing goyls and jerking off to pron.

i suppose if a woman knew their secs partners as good as i knew any of those 17 people……then i cant really be butthurt if they fooked them. because i knew those people pretty well, a lot more than what I imagine women know the men they casually fook.

so there. you are allowed a max n of 17 by age 30!

but i dont want age 30 women, i want age 25 women.

ok, so how many of those friends were by age 25 for me? vast majority. maybe 15. i really slowed down on the friendmaking after age 24, 25 or so.

Fifteen Partners by Age 25. I HAVE to allow it. shit that sounds like SO MANY though.

i was in church and there was an adorable, well-behaved, blond-haired Little Gurl near me. I felt a very Paternal, Fatherly Urge towards her. Like I want to PROTECT that Little Gurl and make sure no one hurts her. none of these degenerate BOYS who just want ONE THING.

and there was nothing secsual about it, thank god. i didnt want to molest or Touch or Fondle or Make Out with the Little Gurl. Those things seemed disgusting, as they should. however I felt that perhaps hugging or “cuddling” the girl might be appropriate insofar as the realm of Fatherly Protection and Comfort, like how a little girl would cuddle with her Father. I didn’t see anything inherently degenerate with that.

so then I thought about how Cuddling could be a completely nonsexual act. in that you could do it with people you are not sexually attracted to AT ALL. well you can do it with just about ANYONE, really.

how about this. a dark net market for your local region, so you could essentially buy buy things and then have the person drop them off at a drop spot. stealth. rather than sending Stuff through the Mail. damn.

today i thought, if its impossible for me to luv women, and I REALLY want easy casual secs, i should look at like 45 year old milfs. would prob be easier to bang than 25 year old gurls. who are hard as fookin hell to bang. i need an easier mode. maybe 45 year old women are that mode. but theres a hell of a lot more bangable 25 year old women than 45 year old women! but they might like being a Cougar to a Younger Man hahahaha. not that I would be super young, like a 25 year old Cougar Cub is super young hahahaha.

this is why i d’nate 24 dollars a year to WEEV, so he can Engineer Software to tell white faces from black faces hahahahahahahaha. glad to see george feels in the comments hehehehe. because of this i think george is on the cusp of becoming one of us hehehehe. anyway i agree with weev that we need more pro hwyte, 1433 hackers and programmers and security types. it aint me babe, becuase i FOOKING HATE COMPUTERS. I FOOKING HATE THEM. as far as fixing problems with them, or figuring out how they work, i fooking HATE all that shit. i only like using working computers to use the internets. as far as coding and programming and networks and COMPUTER CAREERS, I HATE that shit. thats why i quit muh education in computers and never continued doing it for fun. BECAUSE IT ISNT FUN AT ALL.

jan 15

good cover of Best Ulver Song here, ol Winterfylleth has been Pinging on muh radar and they do a good version of the iconic song. not much change from original other than changing the lyrics to english. which i dont mind at all.

i think of them in same vein as SAOR, ie semi “pagan” stuff from The British Isles, but seems to be more blasts here. maybe wodensthrone would be better comparison. which is perfectly fine, i appreciate wodensthrone!

heh might get banned for muh inflammatory post on jan 15 hahahaha. i was turning a corner here. from complete despair and sorrow over that woman, to having a little more energy, and anger, little hwyte boi rage hahahaha, and also i was getting back to muh racial roots thank god. that whol debacle took my focus away from where it really matters, ie my people. was so obsessed with HER I couldnt even think of MUH PEOPLE.

heres the next most recent winterfylleth album, sounds pretty good. the main criticism im seeing is that they are “samey” and “boring”, and i could see that happening, but they present a very hwyte, beautiful, awesome   A E S T H E T I C nonetheless.

dnated 5 feckin dollas to the lawyer who defended WEEV and now weev has put out a call to donate to this guy. heh i wont dnate any more but when weev vouches for the guy, that is good enough for me. i look at it as giving a tiny token for keeping weev out of prison for life. i mean he already went to prison. thinking this lawyer was key in helping get him OUT of prison.

the ol legs are a bit sore from the activity i put them thru yesterday. so i will take it easy today.

maybe we SHOULD “PRACTICE” on milf sluts. is it easier to be Confident around a 45 year old milf slut, that around a 25 year old Young Slut?  I think maybe. good chance. good hypothesis. I actually do like this idea. obviously the trick is finding a 45 year old woman who still looks good. probably the ones that do, have a vastly overinflated sense of self worth. just like the 25 year old ones hahahahahaha.

made muh famous Beef N Bacon Chili. it is packed with Protein and Fat hahahahaha. 2.25 lbs of beef, about .75 lbs of bacon (12 oz package), 2.5 cups tomato sauce, 1 cup salsa, 30 oz of beans hahahaha.

trimmed beard to level 2, have been meaning to do that. i was surprised at how much it trimmed off. do this more often so i dont look like a slob. be thankful i have a NEW JOB where i am allowed to have a NEATLY TRIMMED beard. so keep it NEATLY TRIMMED. thankfully it didnt look TOO bad before this.

did i not STRETCH properly yesterday? probably not. i stretched a LITTLE, but it was prob too little, too late.

i know ive linked this before but well worth linking again. very similar to winterfylleth, possibly even better. atmospheric and epic without being huge shoegazing pvssies. plenty of savage blasting. now with moar kvlt factor now that they are RIP. i dont usually like Full Bands but these guys do a good job. good drummer. good guitar playerz.

still think of that woman unfort. how i want to hold her sweaty pasty non potato body hahahaha and gaze into her eyes and have her smile at me and touch her for hours. how do you replace that feel. well women do it very easily. any man will do. i wish she had as fookin HARD of a time replacing ME as I am replacing her. people aren’t that god damn replaceable. they SHOUDNT be.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin_Peaks_(2017_TV_series)

so yeah the “third season” of twin peaks IS happening, it IS directed and written by david lynch, and I SHOULD be legit excited for this.

watched some teasers, not much there, other than to hint DIS GON BE GOOD. pretty much all the main people who arent dead. angelo badalamenti is not dead and is doing music. david lynch is not dead thank GOD. but he does look old AF and i hope he’s quit smoking. he is absolutely ridiculous but he never sold out to the J’s as much as other holywood people hehehe.

maybe david lynch did something big in the past couple years and i missed it because i have not been paying attention to movies.

nope, nothing.

anyway i could see myself getting back into movies again. but its a lot harder to do Unpozzed movies or TV than unpozzed music because of all the damn (((people))) involved. theres ALWAYS a you know who in there.

but yeah. that woman. damn. i dont WANT to start something new with a new woman. i wanted things to work out with HER. we already HAD something. i dont WANT to find somebody new. the special feelies i had, they were for HER. and that we had built something together. and i got to know her nice and slowly over a period of several years, not some whirlwind clusterfook of meeting and fooking and dating and hanging out and breaking up and sorrow and jealousy and bitterness that starts and ends in a period of like 3 months, and you never really KNEW the person.

i dont want to go through that with anyone. i want to get to know someone gradually. like i did with her. there was really nothing SUDDEN there. except for the ending. i didnt except the Bottom To Fall Out as suddenly as it did. even me going from “no feelings” to “feelings” was a gradual process that started with me really Facing The Feelings, and considering the feelings. Giving the feelings a chance.

and the idea of meeting some 45 year old slut on tinder, banging her within 2 dates, i dont like when things begin like that. i dont like people who begin things like that. but i am increasingly open to the idea of casual sex with sluts. provided i dont GET feelings for them. i havent got feelings for a slut in like 9 years…..but funny things can happen when you hang out with or bang a gurl. it triggers feelings. that they dont get because theyve been through this SO MANY TIMES.

i luv these. see, it happens ALL THE TIME. male falls in LUV with their female friend. and I would argue, the closer of friends they are, the more likely he is to fall in luv with her. if they are “best friends”, then it’s pretty much 100% gonna happen. not if, but when.  NEVER FORGET THIS.

thankfully reddit did not tell him what an evil person he is. and many people say give yourself some space because when you have feelings , you are not ready to be just friends yet. NO SHIT. I thought this was common sense. yep he needs lots and lots of space.

hehehe well at least i am slightly better than that, i have had 10+ jobs in muh life hahahaha.  and I keep meticulous records of everything my fam gives me, and how much I give back to them, and I continually try to increase the % of what i give them hehehehe. cuz yeah i suppose fam is a bit enabling, but i feel appropriate guilt and shame imho and make a good faith effort to pull some weight and give back, plus if i were kicked out i would prob die or K self or have to suck dick, and its probably better to be a damn mooching neet than SUCKING DICK ON THE STREETS.

1433 OVENBURGERS AT 616 DEGREES

dec 10

saor/arsaidh roots MIGHT use a drum machine because i can’t find the name of a session drummer, or a direct quote  confirming like “andy marshall played an actual physical live drum kit on this album and not a machine” hahahaha.

whatever the case, it still sounds pretty damn good, i am really enjoying this guys style. not that its too groundbreaking, but in a way it is in how it seems to use SCOTLAND as its major influence. and nothing seems FORCED or SHOEHORNED.

like on how the following albums aura and guardians they clearly say so and so played drums. austin lunn of panopticon played wildman keith moon james read drums on aura (he sounds pretty good here, attacks the drums very passionately, there is NO WAY this is a machine, but with “roots” its a lot more questionable, and i dont particularly love that.)

i will probably buy a damn 25 dollar SAOR shirt hahaha but want to wait until 2017 because i have been spending TOO MUCH DAMN MONEY.

took 1 benedryl yesterday at like 6:30 pm and didnt quite hit like nyquil, but i still slept the sleep of the dead. well i did wake up once and did not fall back asleep immediately…but i did fall back into a deep sleep until almost 10 am and still feel groggy hehehehe. just from 1 tiny nebedryl.

but i was thinking it would be ideal to take it during the “work week” so i dont stay up too late and get 5 hours of sleep hehehehe. more sleep is good but im like gotta study gotta study gotta study so i dont sound like an idiot. i feel like an idiot.

so take a benedryl or nyquil as SOON as i get home, maybe do a little sleep groggy studying, and go to bed early enough to get 8 hours and wake up at 5 am hahahaha. go to SLEEP at 9pm not 11pm.

making BURGERS in the OVEN so i can then FREEZE the burgers and have them during the Big Boy NonNeet Work Week hahahahahahaha. Third Pound Burgers of 5.3 oz each. make 5 burgers at once, freeze them, bring out one per day, as alternative to buying expensive and sodium filled Deli Meats like ham or salami and i just dont like sliced turkey hahahaha. give me a damn beefburger all day. NOT lean either hahahaha. eating fat filled beef is how i lost 35 pounds and now fit into size 32 pants like a boss. and achieved a bmi of…. 21.5.

some women would freak out if their bmi were that “high” hahaha and want it back to 18 hehehe.

hehehe i would totally take a women with bmi 21.5 hehehehehe.

ok had about 1.46 lbs of 80 20 beef. started making third pound 5.3 oz patties. made 4 of those and then a tiny one. took some out of each to make the Little One into 4 ounces. 5 patties now total. made them as flat as i could on the baking sheet. put lawrys and pepper and garlic flakes on. put in oven for about 20 minutes, no flipping. at this point they were done, brown on inside, about medium. puddle of grease in the pan, burgers sitting in fat. used tongs to gently squeeze most fat out of patties. but i LUV FAT, so i dont mind a Glaze Of Fat on the Patties. your BRAIN is MADE OF FAT hahahaha.

had bought lowest cal white buns i could find, 110 cals each. pro tip: maybe try looking for SLIDER buns. started picking bits out of the buns to kinda hollow them out. get about .8 of a bun, 88 calories hahaha. 1488 burgers hahahaha.

put the burgers into little ziploc baggies and put them in freezer. 2 i put buns in there with them. take burgers out the night before to thaw in refrigerator.

ate one of the burgers right there. it tasted fine, tasted good. OVENBURGERS. i guess that DOES make them truly 1488Burgers!

but yeah they tasted perfectly fine, not dry at all, i mean shit they might be BETTER than burgers on the grill.

sheeeeeeeit. so i got delivered to muh inbox, an ideal job at an ideal employer. something that would have given me double boner during the merciless job search, where i dropped everything and applied for it IMMEDIATELY. so those are STILL the types of jobs I should apply for!!!! AND I would have a better chance at getting it now that i have essentially Ended The Dreaded GAP.

THEORETICALLY I could get the 42k a year job (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and then profusely apologize to the nice people at muh new 13k a year job (they are nice good people and i would feel guilty for disappointing them) and take them out to lunch. where i would spend no more than ………………. 75 dollars on the lunch hahahahaha.

actually they might be happy that i found a good paying FT job. I would be happy for a person in that position! its not like i’m DOING much anyway! I can’t believe they have the extra 13k laying around for what i am doing! for as low stress as the job is, i DESERVE to be making MINIMUM wage!!!!!!

trying to finish this damn body fortress whey protein. it has a lot of calories in it hahahaha so i dont take more than a quarter scoop at a time.

its an ok idea, and yeah it is less “costly” protein because you get an even higher calories to protein ratio in meat or cheese…..but those taste much better hahahahaha. also i would think damn POWDER would have LESS calories than it does.

in short, i would be better served by eating beef or chikun for muh protein.

i prefer fatty beef because i like Good Fats too and Huhwhyte Chicken Breast has no flavor. legs and thighs and wings are nice though.

maybe chikun breasts wrapped in bacon hahahaha.

also another good thing about muh New Job is that it will def help me Move On from That Woman. it is almost like the last key in the puzzle. well actually finding a New Woman would be the final, but a new job is also VERY YUGE and its just YUGEly positive and I THANK GOD for that.

did i mention that i think the hospital was going to say YES and OFFER me that job?

maybe the big picture lesson is that That Woman was NEVER a Good Fit for me at all anyway. Maybe I was even playing Captain Save A Ho. Not that she was a HO per se, but she kinda did have a troubled, unfortunate life. if i were being mean i would say Fatherless White Trash. but they had good qualities too: like she wasnt a high number SLUT, and i think most of her family had decent/ok morals, there was nothing really for me to SAVE her from, she was just kinda of a lower social class than me. but if anythign i felt she could SAVE ME by being Muh First Real GF and BOY would i have hit the JACKPOT there with such a nice sweet kind pretty and young low number gurl. she would be a GREAT gf for me. also she picks guys who dont show her enough luv. i would have showed her plenty of luv. but maybe she doesnt WANT a guy whos that NEEDY. and being show luv is a turnoff for her.

and in the LONG RUN, we were from TWO DIFFERENT WORLDS like romeo and juliet hahahaha. still at least romeo and juliet luved EACH OTHER and probably banged and cuddled a little bit hahahahaha.  unrequited luv is moar tragic than requited luv hahahaha. so yeah i would have liked a CHANCE. like just a few months of “dating” would have been nice.  who cares if we were from two different worlds. they arent THAT different. were both WHYTE. her immediate family wasnt too trashy. like neck tattoos, pain pills, alcoholics, all the men are violent or in jail.

but there was always trouble brewing on the distance. sure not her “immediate” family who lived in her house, but this relative is a pill popper and that relative is a drunk and bla bla is a pill popper on disability and etc. do i really want to merge myself with that troubled family?

again her immediate family was ok……but very close to that are some serious probs.

and even if her mother wasnt a degen drug addict………she still couldnt pick a good man! maybe she was a huge bitch who drove good men away, and she only wanted Deadbeat Men who would leave HER in the lurch! just BACK ASSWARDS with her relships! and do you think her daughter isn’t gonna pick up on that? maybe act the same way?

so in other words, i really DODGED A BULLET! I should be THANKING her for getting herself out of my life! NO GOOD could have come from that!

well thats not true. some good would have def come from it hahahaha.

but it WOULD HAVE ended. It wouldnt have lasted.

still, i would have liked to just try it and experience the GF Experience for a year, if i was just gonna get dumped anyway hahahaha.

i mean really her and her family were right on the fence. they could have gone either way. i wasnt looking to save anyone from abject degeneracy….but i kinda wanted to point people in the right direction who were right in the middle like that. COME WITH ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE hahahaha.

i’d be like ok were gonna stop sm0king MJ so much. We’ll find a good winner man for your mother. we’ll do an intervention on your extended family members and if they dont clean up their act we will defoo them. we’ll do a little pygmalion on you and teach you the difference between your and you’re. we’ll (we meaning I hahaha) will implicitly steer you to some honest to god racial consciousness so that you’d never THINK of ever fooking another black cok. you will never WANT to go back!  that was a big problem with her, is that she was WAY too sympathetic to blacks…….but i think I honestly could have turned her, she showed promise for Red Pill thinking. I mean you’re SUPPOSED to MOLD women, and she showed decent potential for being molded. but she didnt want me to mold her i guess.

she wasnt so far gone in other words. like i say, she was right on the damn fence. i could have KEPT her from embarking on the road to ruin. and i guess she didnt want that.

i was also jealous of her because she could do MJ any time she wanted, and i had to depend on her for MJ. and when our rel was FAILING, i was jealous of everything she did because she didnt want to do it with ME.

and now I probably accuse her of being some huge degen MJhead doing 1 oz  every day, when she really wasnt! she might have not even been an every day user! i have NO PROOF!

so i shit talk her and say she is taking 9000 black dicks, or smokin MJ every day, etc, when she really isnt. just because im butthurt she didnt pick me.

WRONG, im butthurt because she didnt pick me, in the most disrespectful and cowardly way imaginable hahahaha.

well, when it came to Bad Influences, she usually chose wisely in dumping those people from her life, like drunks and druggies, who would then accuse her of being on a high horse, try to make her feel guilty, etc. and i would tell her don’t worry about them, they are just butthurt, besides, its totally legit to dump bad influences from your life.

and i hate that IIIIIII became one of those bad influences! I may be a loser, but im not as big of loser as pill poppers and drug addicts and degenerate womanizers and degenerate sluts and degen white trash!!!!!! and i hate being lumped in with people like that!

but she WASNT lumping me in with them, she was just running away from a tough situation. still, the end result was the same for me.

graveland has just released a rerecording album of old stuff, which is usually a bad idea, except alot of their old stuff had really bad production, and this is produced by the main man of MGLA, who is a really good producer who knows how to get a really good sound. and also graveland has a real drummer here. which was my second big problem with graveland.

i cant possibly diss graveland because they are the oldest most legendary polish BM band, rob darken is pro-white and racially woke, but their music was often boring, poorly produced, and used a damn drum machine. so its nice to see him fixing these issues.

and i guess this was recorded “live in the studio” which imho is the ideal way to record an album, no idea why you would record any other way IF you happen to have a live drummer…..which you should.

i guess he has softened and sold out a bit so he could play giant metal festivals and appreciate his nonwhite fans……but i guess i dont really care. he probably deserves to make a living from his music and i would give him the benefit of the doubt that he is pro-white and would not support muslims pouring into europe, for example. but yeah i also guess i would prefer he is more clear about saying such things, rather than “graveland has never been a political band, its a PAGAN band”

i guess mgla are sellouts because kim kelly and leftists and sjw’s like mgla hahahaha. well LOTS of people like mgla. call them racist for associating with mikko a. will probably call them racist for associating with racist graveland. but graveland is cucking on their “racism” to make jooshekels selling their music.

yeah but playing shows would be kinda FUN and why shouldnt you make money on it. i would just draw the line if darken APOLOGIZES for being white or makes blatant sjw talk. plus i like mgla, i like mgla’s production skills, and i like real drummers.

well….i forgot graveland DID have a real drummer in their early days, and he turned out to be a HUGE racist. (capricornus.) so that is kewl. however his work was not very compelling, and he became a huge alcoholic or drug addict and disappeared entirely. not cool. be a racist AND make good, good sounding music, with real drums hehehe.

yeah the drums sound really good on this recording. sigrunar is the drummer. never heard of him. hope he’s a pole. it would be kewl if it was the drummer from mgla, he is really really good.  but its not like theres only one good drummer in poland. the guy from furia is also really good. poles are capable of amazing greatness like any whites. which is why i hate sloppy, off-time, badly-produced drums! and i am really glad to see poles really Winning in black metal in the last few years. not to crap on the old polish stuff……but i kinda have to, because it is very difficult and unrewarding to listen to.  probably im just not KVLT enough ahahahhahahaa.

so sue me for wanting to be able to understand what i’m listening to. hey i like RAW NECRO KVLT productions. but theres good kvlt and theres bad kvlt. transilvanian hunger is a perfect production. it sounds just right.  something like…..i dunno…trying to think of old polish bm….ok veles “black hateful metal” is really hard to listen to.

now that mgla is getting so BIG, purists are starting to crap on them. actually the production on this graveland album does sound very…..mglaish. which imho is a great thing! even darken’s voice. it sounds great and passionate, whereas 20 years ago, he sounded like a damn croaking frog. (tho not nearly as bad as inquisition, oh my lord.)

not to crap on inquisition either. they have flirted with pro-white stuff too. not sure if they have cucked in response.

all the more reason we need Explicitly Alt Right Music. a black metal band could just be like, yep, i’m alt right, with all the racial stuff that entails.  and i think in the coming years, this is exactly whats gonna happen. and its prob gonna be with younger bands. kinda like how lots of young college kids are getting into the alt right. i think this is AWESOME.

not that older people cant get into the alt right. i sure did. i just wish i had it when I was young like these kids today do! they got LUCKY!

and it really makes you see how the Youth are NECESSARY for the success of any political movement. compare with a bunch of oldfags grumbling on stormfront or vnn or the older WN forums. its not BAD per se, but theres barely any young people, a lot of old people, and a lot of damn LOSERS. we need more WINNERS, and YOUNG people, and YOUNG WINNERS.

I know my place as an Old Loser. So I would fit in very well with stormfront or vnn hahaha. but i dont like being an old loser. i cant change being old, but i can slowly change being a loser. how about getting with a winning pro white team rather than a losing one. go with the strong horse.

if stormfront was really smart, they would get fully on board with TRS, send people over to talk, have don black Reach Out and publicly embrace trs. maybe it could have saved his darn son from becoming a damn sjw. that is sad.

the software used at the new job has a much more….professional dev team than at my old place, where everything was opaque and secret and out of date. here everything is up front, the knowledge base has a lot of pictures, it has a COMMENT SECTION where users can ask questions and request features and report bugs, rather than calling tech support, request a feature, and have it thrown into the memory hole because level 2 is not approving escalation and level 1 is thoroughly confused and flustered and the user can’t talk to people who actually know the program and have power to fix shit. no comments allowed. just a forum where angry users ask confused questions, and the company responds with please call tech support to start a ticket thank you is there anything else i can help you with.

when ideally a level 2 would call them ASAP, escalate a case to development ASAP, and tell the user yes we WILL fix this in 6 months hahahaha.

this new job software, users can talk to Company Level 3’s right on the knowledge base page, AND vote on new features, AND see updates where a feature request is ACTUALLY implemented a few months later! a company giving a real good faith effort to its users rather than trying to pawn them off on confused, underpaid, vastly undertrained level 1’s!!!!!!!! it just looks a lot more professional and ETHICAL.

I still dont understand the software as good as these experienced users making comments tho.

BUT I DONT HAVE TO TAKE CALLS FROM THEM ALL DAY!!!!!!

seeing detailed release notes of here’s what was fixed, here’s the new features, and here’s the original discussion where a user asked for this change. we didnt have anything CLOSE to that before. the users didnt even KNOW about the knowledge base / help articles, and sure couldn’t comment on them. even tech support couldnt comment on them. tech support knew less than the users.

is all tech support like that? i mean everybody is a NEWB at some point. and when youre a newb, you are less experienced than your callers. its what you do.

i dunno. i just never want to take tech support calls ever ever EVER again. maybe 1, 2 hours a day tops.

i dont really have to answer the phone, and i am sitting in the room all day with someone with a masters degree who is an expert in this software. an SME in all areas of this software, who i can simply say hay whats going on here? and they are not chained to their desk or working on 20 cases or trying to help 20 other level 1s. such a 180 degree difference. i wish i had never left for that other job. i learned some good skills and gained some confidence sure…….BUT THEN I LOST IT ALL, and now i am LESS CONFIDENT than EVER before. it was a NET LOSS. I regret ever doing it. the gains were heavily outweighed by the losses. i was in a 3 year rut.

lesson: NEVER take a job in a call center where you have to PULL TEETH to get help…..and you are gonna need help at least 20 times a day. your first line of help is a shitty knowledge base that explains nothing and makes no sense. sigggghhhhh ughhhhhhhhh did you even READ article 82047????? you didnt really read and understand it because you’re still asking me your stupid question, maybe you don’t FIT in this job. no maybe i fooking DONT.

when i was young i didnt understand that Khazar Milkers were a thing. Or that red hair is probably just as common in Joos as it is in Huhwhytes. So when i met a young qt jooish gurl with nice khazar milkers and red hair, i thought i hit the jackpot hahahahaha. found someone really special. WRONG hahahaha.

no im not butthurt about that woman…..any more hahahaha. but at that time 10 years ago i sure was! more like 11, 12 years. i thought i was losing someone of real value. WRONG. hahahaha.

no she wasnt technically a person of no value. but she didnt really WANT to be of value to ME, and she didnt value ME nearly as much as i valued HER. story of muh life with women hahahahaha.

also i’m done with joos hahahaha. NEVER AGAIN.

and its not because of HER…..its because of JOOS as a WHOLE.

you wanna be a good joo? go to 15r43l and STAY there. i cant expect a joo to repudiate being jooish. its just NOT POSSIBLE. itd be like me repudiating being huhwhyte!!!!!!

anyway, today, kids are learning at age 20 what i didn’t learn till age 30. what i wouldnt give to have those 10 years back! those really are the most IMPORTANT years of your life!!!!!

im talking about alt right stuff, especially JQ stuff. it was probably JQ that fully converted me to red pill, WN, alt right. probably the biggest, hardest, most important red pill there is. once you understand the JQ, everything else makes sense. the JQ separates the men from the boys. either you get it or you don’t. the good news is you can learn. i did. and thanks to the alt right, kids are learning now from a good young age!

a comment on an article saying “we had a panicked caller at the service desk today over a related issue, here’s what happened, we are expecting lots more calls on this.” from what sounded like an experienced , level 2 help desk guy. and he has the power to comment on knowledge base (KB) articles, which company software teams actually read and respond to.

THIS IS AMAZING! THIS SEEMS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE! IM JUST WAITING FOR THE OTHER SHOE TO DROP!!!!!!!

rather than level 1 help desk people shouting into the abyss, CAN SOMEONE WHO KNOWS SOMETHING HELP THIS POOR WOMAN! I DONT KNOW WHAT IM DOING AND she deserves a good faith effort!

seems like a real KAIZEN sort of company hahahahaha. where the previous company most certainly was not. runarounds, excuses, buck passing, we dont have any record of that, call the service desk and start a ticket, it can be fixed, it will be fixed in a future update, just saying that to get them off the phone, with NO assurance from higher ups that YES this really IS a known issue and more importantly, we ARE going to fix it, i PROMISE!!!!!!

this shit is very important to me, and, i imagine, to the average end user. it’s VERY frustrating when its not important to level 2’s and above.

holy FOOK there is a section in the KB article called “FIXED BUGS” and clearly lists the bugs, with a paragraph called EXPLANATION. they give an EXPLANATION and CALL IT an explanation explicitly! here’s how you EXPLAIN this to callers who want an EXPLANATION!!!!!!!!!!!

now i dont work for this company, really no one who uses this software works for that company in-house. you buy access to the software, probably at a highass price. but its good to see they are taking their customers damn seriously, or at least appear to be!

maybe at the last company, we were all in house, the developers, the users, so thats why they felt they could get away with such shitty service. your callers werent the companys CUSTOMERS.

but this is FOOKING STUPID because they’re calling BECAUSE they are trying to serve paying customers, and the company’s in house software is preventing them from doing that! and believe me, many customers WALKED because of stupid shit like this!

the company was LEGIT FAILING. that’s why they had tons of layoffs, because they were losing money, because customers were walking, weren’t coming back! partially because of shit like this! shitty service! so they closed the place where i used to work and laid off all those good people who did HEROIC shit every day because they wanted to help these poor callers, but we were fighting against higher ups all the time! nope just give them the runaround, its too expensive to fix the problem. ignore it.

i’m glad to see the company failing because of this…….but i’m not happy to see all those good people lose their jobs. but the job sucked and they deserve better jobs. REALLY they should have laid off all the upper management and executives and given the level 1’s and prob level 2’s a raise and promoted the good ones to manager, and given them power to actually fix shit and take their callers seriously. to kaizen shit, constantly improve your software and systems, which needed SO MUCH IMPROVEMENT its not even funny.

nope just keep kickign the can down the road and slapping bandaids on a TOTAL CLUSTERFOOK.

so shit yeah i was disgruntled from that place hahahaha.

and i was butthurt at that woman because she wasnt. she was like oh well, whatever, its just a job, dont let it get to you, get out of my life entirely, i dont want you in my life any more.

losing a loved person is a big stressful life event. so is losing your job. so is being in a soul crushing stressful job. and i had all of that going on at once. so that i was in some form of extreme pain for  3 full years. the 3 year rut. i cant believe i am finally starting to get out of it. THANK GOD. yeah also being long term unemployed is very bad for your self respect, self esteem, confidence. 3 year fookin rut man. the past 3 years sucked balls. and i cant believe its finally coming to an end. FINALLY. THANK GOD.

FREE AT LAST, FREE AT LAST, THANK GOD ALMIGHTY, IM FREE AT LAST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I DONT WANT A PRESIDENT WHO DOESNT USE VULGAR LANGUAGE TO TALK ABOUT WOMEN

oct 5 2016

sheeeeeeit.

ok. got up and prepared for day like responsible man: shower, shave, breakfast, brush and floss, tied tie, now i am just waiting until i leave in 53 minutes to drive to interview starting at 2pm.

tell them at interview today that if it get the job at the “bank” uhhhh i have to take it. that is the one with int on upcoming tues that i am all excited about hehe. i mean it is a patently better job, better pay, prob better benefits, closer, i’d be an idiot not to. any non-failing business would agree with me hehehe.

leave for interview in 13 minutes. all dressed up atm. ready to go. try not to diaerrhoea.

shirt is def too big. pants are….not too small but they are “slim fit” unfort, so they will ALWAYS feel a little weird. i honestly could not find an ok looking blue suit that was not slim fit. it was the price i had to pay.

yeah just the idea that you need 100% accuracy and no errors, the job is, this NEEDS to be PERFECT, not 99.9%, but 100%, every time, your job is to make sure its PERFECT. ok i get that. but what i dont get is that asking a more experienced person to SIGN OFF on this is considered time wasting and hand holding and youre fired. NO. it should be Best Practices and Standard Operating Procedure to have a “Team Lead” Sign Off on your work.

oh golly gee i dont know what im doing but i hope its right because our paying client needs this airplane door to be 100% or else it will fly off at 140000 feet and 500 passengers will get sucked out the door to their deaths hahahaha.

or this bridge will fall apart and 1000 people will die and its on YOUR hands, lowly level 1 guy, not the Master Engineer who YOU thought “should” “sign off” on such an important project. no hes got better things to do like get drunk at lunch and look at Prep The Bull and Trap Porn on his work computer and make 4 times as much as you.

later

welp did my interview. it was kinda ridiculous but not in a horrible way. mainly the guy double booked his interviews for 2 people at the same time, there was a white man also dressed in a nice suit, but he seemed about 5 years older than me.  but healthy and regenerate looking hahaha. very healthy weight. anyway this other manager decided he would essentially do the interview with me, so i started talking to him, he was an all right guy, but then it was like ok lets see if the original manager is ready to talk to you now. so i ultimately talked to TWO managers one after the other and the whole thing took like 1 hour 40 minutes. thankfully both guys were nice and the company and job actually seemed all right EXCEPT there is a kind of sales/incentive pay structure, but there is a damn 13 week training program and starting at 17 dollars an hour at that time, so…..thats pretty good. the guy said the guys here were very “BLUE COLLAR” and i said thats great, I come from a blue collar family and have a Thick Skin to handle Bantz and F-Bombs hahahahaha.

i said all the right marketing bullshit about the companys culture and values and bla bla bla.

there were some times when i stumbled and sounded like an autist, similarly to how i did yesterday, but just like the person yesterday, they didnt jump on me for it or even seem to care. so i spilled the spaghetti a couple times, NO BIG DEAL. and that is ultimately pretty encouraging.

there was a sales office right there and they are hiring sales people too. i said my background was more geared towards Service Technician than Sales per se, although I DO have very good Communication and People skills and like to Educate people hahhahahahahaha.

but they also emphasized they are an Ethical company and do not try to sell people things they dont need. Which could be BS, but I said, Good, because I’m a very ethical guy and I wouldn’t want to sell people things they really don’t need. which is NOT BS!!!!!!!

well i have been so busy interviewing i missed the deadline for a few jobs to apply hehe. have to keep a PIPELINE going hahahahahahaha.

one thing i did like about the job today was that they had a lot of training. a LOT of training. 13 weeks. they said a lot of guys were confident at 8 weeks and said let me get out there, the the company wanted to err on the side of caution. and make sure people passed tests and got certified for jobs where certification was not Legally Mandatory.

now they could just be bullshitting to sell the job to me…..but its pretty good bullshit! shit yeah tell me more about how you make sure your people are fully trained.

since it does get into incentive based shit after training, i asked if any of the people really struggled with that. the manager said everyone is doing well and reaching goals. and these are salty technicians and not born smooth talking salesmen.

anyway i hate the idea that a woman will dump you as soon as you stop showing strength. that she can need you but GOD FORBID you ever need HER. is this really the way women are and i just have to accept it? I accept that men are stronger emotionally and physically and mentally than women and that men have to do MOST of the work……but I don’t think women cant be capable of doing any work at all. so you have to support her always, and she supports you NEVER? thats fookin gay.

yeah well she never gave up and walked out when her longterm boifran was freezing HER out. but im not sure he was being “WEAK” though. he was being strong but silent hahahaha. well, he might not have been being “STRONG” but he wasnt being WEAK either. he was jsut distant and cold and stubborn. but she made a real effort with him at least.

so yeah she was capable. jsut not with me. because i was weak hahahaha.

i just HATE the idea that you have to be PERFECT or else they LEAVE.

but thats clearly not true! her BF wasnt perfect and she gave him MORE than a fair chance! many women stay with men who are VERY not perfect!

yeah but these men present as strong, and not at all as weak. they dont get nervous or anxious. they might get ANGRY at the women always wanting to TALK and DO STUFF and FIX stuff. but the men are not freaking out like a hysterical WOMAN.

oct 6

 

classic album here, if you dont like this album, gtfo. train your 3dpd fat slob to like this album as you bang her hahahahaha.

as a lifelong fan of srs metal, i have learned the important and mature lesson than women who like metal = crazy = bad (im talking about like serious fans of black or death metal, not they like a few random hit metal songs by metallica or pantera or slayer or motorhead or iron maiden or something, that should be fine).

but yeah a woman that likes the CURE, i would still be pretty impressed by that. even though im old enough to KNOW BETTER about being IMPRESSED by a womans MUSICAL TASTE. its a traaaappp.

i dont even think robert smith is as big a degenerate as most musicians, well, assuming from the fact that he’s been married to the same woman for like 40 years.

never saw the cure live and they are one of the few on muh live concert bucket list. note to self, if i have feelings for a woman, do NOT take that woman to the cure concert, because i wont be able to remember that as a good memory when she dumps me and breaks my heart hahaha. go with a male friend or alone.

yeah hard to go wrong with the cure. it is smooth and chill, and beautiful, and melodic, romantic, catchy, and also sad and emo, and spine chilling, and this album is probably their best moment. the Lush Beauty of “pictures of you” to the super catchy hard rocking of “fascination street” and of course their biggest hit “lovesong” which is a great song. i mean its impossible not to like and RESPECT this album. for any fan of music. if you dislike this album YOUR JUST STUPID.

yeah i guess if youre a total hipster you could say its too mainstream and overplayed. its def mainstream but is it REALLY overplayed? are these REALLY boring songs? these are timeless, classic songs that are played a lot for a REASON.

it IS a little LONG though at 63 minutes, where 40 minutes is the ideal album length.

working class men on Worksites listen to MUSIC all day as they do their hard work. i think this is very significant and worth some thought. if you are listening to music, it is harder to PANIC and be ANXIOUS and NERVOUS, and ALSO it means you are CONSTANTLY TALKING and thinking on your feet to come up with Bullshit Explanations for both your supervisors and your customers. that is EXHAUSTING. its like CAMPAIGNING for president and you have to talk and bullshit all day. i could NEVER do that, i dont know where trump gets his ENERGY, but its safe to say he’s always been that way, and some people just ARE.

heheh i forgot about the 311 cover of lovesong. that is tbh pretty darn good fam hahahaha. pretty secsy for blowing out your bitches asshole hahahahaha. because they LIKE being treated like Jooish Pornographic Filth. Absolutely Disgusting. BELIEVE ME, I would rather treat them as Fragile Flowers, because I HATE Jooish Pornographic Filth. Hate that Disgusting SHit that has RUINED Women And Men. words cannot describe the HATE. i dont hate nonwhites, i might not even hate joos, but by god i HATE the disgusting filth that joos have created! I hate the evil they have done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

funny that the cure has an album called “pornography.” as an old man, this to me is AWESOME because that is an INCREDIBLY dark, despairing, nihilistic album, and I think this terrible feel perfectly captures the actual real essence of pornography. it is not secsy or hot and all. it is empty and despairing and nihilistic and soulless and horrible. i’m not sure if thats what robert (first name basis hahahaha) was getting at, but i like to think he was hahahahaha.

and yeah “pictures of you” is a CLASSIC FOR A REASON!!!!! and perfectly captures Lost Love and Heartbreak and Regret and embodies what i have felt for the past 14 months hahahahahahaha. thankfully i can enjoy the song on its own merits as a way to express a personal emotion that was unshared with her, hahahaha. meaning, im glad i never cuddled or buttfooked her while listening to THE CURE or this album, because then it would actually REMIND me of her, rather than help me Get Over Muh Emotions ABOUT her. in other words, the cure is MY thing and not HER thing, definitely not OUR thing. well she probably likes a few cure songs but we never shared any cure moments, thank god.

NEVER share things with women hahahahaha cuz then you cant enjoy your favorite music and movies when they break your heart and leave you. THEY WILL RUIN YOUR FAVORITE THINGS FOR YOU. i mean thank god i can still listen to neil young, but it took a while! TOO LONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yeah i mean you get over it, but it sucked that i couldnt even listen to one of muh favorite music guys for months!!!!!!!!!!!!

want to get out of house before noon today (oh god that sounds so lazy and negrish!!!!!!) and do some errands

also prep for autist aba job interview tommorow

AND apply for 3 jobs because i think about 3 decent jobs are gonna “expire” by tommorow

AND get good powerwalk

AND get 14 pushups

AND eat less than 1200 calories because i went like EIGHT HUNDRED OVER yesterday, oy vey.

uhhhh 14 pushups is a good baby step, but all together that is a lot of baby steps hahahaha.

ok went to store

ok called the interview place and stalked the woman who will be interviewing me, she was supposed to email me 2 days ago but it never went thru because she typed my hard to spell email wrong.

i called her and aksed for her hard to spell email and successfully sent a message to her hahahaha. thankfully she does not have a masters degree and seems like a nice person from the stalking i did.

ok got the shit printed out, hehhehe if you have to print out 10 pages of shit for every interview, thats 250 pages hahahaha. i have already bought 2 black ink cartridges and am burning thru the 3rd one pretty quickly. so stupid.

not going to get a ton of sleep tonight, might blank out and do a gary johnson aleppo moment tomorrow. that really looks bad. well if he can get to be governor, i can get a 12 dollar an hour autism technician job.

uhhhh applied to 2 jobs today but not 3. prepared my info sheet for tomorrow.

this org clearly has a problem with people not sticking around. prob because they quickly find better paying jobs. and they cant afford to pay them more because they are a nonprofit org. so they are angry about people getting valuable autism training and then leaving before 10 months. but i……

i dunno i just hate being in a job and saying OH GOD HOW AM I GONNA DO THIS I DONT KNOW WHAT IM DOING I CANT HANDLE THIS JOB OH GOD WHAT DO I DO OH GOD THIS IS RIDICULOUS WHY DID THEY GIVE ME THIS JOB OH YEAH BECAUSE THEY CANT FIND PEOPLE WHO WILL PUT UP WITH THIS SHIT FOR MORE THAN A FEW DAYS WITHOUT QUITTING!!!! WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO HERE WHAT SHOULD I SAY TO THESE PEOPLE TELL ME WHAT TO DO PLEEEEASE TELL ME WHAT TO SAY TO THEM I DONT KNOW WHAT IM DOOOOOOOOOOOING HOW CAN YOU PUT ME OUT HERE IN FRONT OF THESE PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i also worry that the “workplace safety” job will do regular drug tests because you drive a company van. oh god i cant drive a large van!!!!!!! what if the van breaks down!!!!!!

i think this autism job would be more fun and i would enjoy it more and also be able to SURVIVE and WITHSTAND it better, because it is part time and because it is sort of in muh wheelhouse. well i am more conflicting about wanting the autism job vs the safety job, however in the autism vs the bank job, i def want the bank job!!!!!

hehehehe this is assuming i get offers from both jobs in these situations. VERY big assumptions!!!!!

does that mean i had a good feeling abotu the saftey job? kind of!

and i have kinda a good feeling about getting the autism job.

REALLY? I have been REJECTED for ELEVEN dollar an hour part time jobs recently, what reason do i have to be optimistic about a TWELVE DAH PT job? hahahahaha. well because my degree actually relates to this job, sort of, where it doesnt relate to “office administrative assistant” job. which is stupid. i mean the better degree for that would be business. even if i have 30 credits of business classes. doesnt matter i guess hahaha.

shit they might reject me because ive never worked with CHILDREN before. let alone autist children haha.

i wish you could negotiate training wages. meaning i would gladly accept minimum wage for the first month or however long it took for me to be rejected from the other 2 jobs i am in contention for. so if i got one of those jobs, the autism place wouldnt lose too much money training me. cuz its a decent org and i might want to reapply with them in a few years. for one of their FT jobs that dont exist, yeah sure hahahaha.

oct 7 firday

752 AM

up real early today, like a real working man, currently dressed up and ready to go to interview, did not prep so well. as predicted, did not sleep well. well i was up thinking until like 130 am. thankfully i did fall asleep and I was in the middle of an interesting dream that i was scheduled to be part of the death panel on the next daily shoah with k1ke enoch and “sven” and i was like iii dunno guys, what the hell am I gonna be able to add to this, im gonna sound like an idiot, but im honored you asked me, i really like TRS hahahahaha. this is probably muh first TRS related DREAM hahahahaha. much better than having dreams about you know WHO hahaha.

ok. like i say, its a tough call between autism job vs safety job. for a normie, no its not, the safety job BTFOs the autism because it pays more, more hours, FT, established company, health care, bennies etc.

12 pm

welp did the interview, sent thank you note, recorded it as 95 minutes. spent an hour in there, but onyl about 30 minutes talking to them, and like 20 minutes filling out a damn application by hand which was basically a copy of all the shit i already gave them. i will never understand these stupid hiring policies. filling out shit by hand. unbelievable. told them about muh desire for FT. they were very understanding. talked to a Masters Level Psychologist who is about 7 years younger than me, oy vey hahahahaha.

there might be young 3 year old children biting and smacking and pooping their pants and i have to put diapers on them. i think i would rather do this than answer phone calls hahahahaha.

i dont fookin know man i just want a job where i can get help if i need it and i am not constantly needing it and not constantly fighting and struggling to survive every day. good god. the type of exhausting, nervous struggle where you feel like you need to chug Whiskey straight from the bottle at the end of every day.

hehehe normal life is at least 2 to 3 times HARDER for me than for normies. not that normies have it easy! but the basics of Holding Down a Job and Banging A Bitch, those are at LEAST 3 times harder for me. lots of fear and failure hehehehe. lots of time wasted. lots of not getting anywhere.

on the degen show “better things” which im not sure why i am watching, well because i want to see a degen single mother raising degen girls, its really all about degen women, and is kinda like “GIRLS” in that regard. no husbands or fathers, mothers a whore, her oldest daughter is 16 and beautiful and is becoming a whore, the middle daughter is an autistic ocd 13 year old lesbian, so i guess all that is enough to sell me.

recent episode focused on the 16 year old daughter worried about her future, going to college and all that, what am i gonna do with my life, her high school guidance counselor says no ivy league for you, you shoulda started prepping for that a few years ago, might not have the grades for a good state shool, have you thought about community college?

now the red pill is that community college is awesome but it DOES have a reputation as for underachieving losers, so when you’re in high school, you shudder at the thought. then when 10 years later youre still a huge loser, you think, welp, i have been humbled, time to go to CC now that real University did not work out.

anyway the girl is very anxious and despairing and I totally related and found this storyline very compelling. i guess she smokes MJ and does not get 4.0 grades. dont know if she is a huge horrible slut. PROBABLY, knowing this degen show.

because they show the girl sitting with her degen mom and the degen moms friends all sitting around drinking and talking about ABORTIONS, like how many abotions you got, tell the story of that abortion, and i was like, they are trying WAY too hard to make this show edgy, and what EXACTLY are they trying to say? they were clearly trying to be provocative by having such a “FRANK” discussion of abortions while CHILDREN were amongst them, as if to say, this is NORMAL, this is not a big deal, we all have abortions, and you’ll get abortions too, its just a fact of life, rite of passage for a woman, dont be ashamed of this, its good to be pro choice, and if you get knocked up when you are having fun with Secsy Boys, you can and should totes get an abortion too.

so i felt sympathy for this poor girl just about to become a Woman, and that she was so FOOKED because her mother is such a damn baby murdering degenerate. so the beautiful 16 year old gurl is gonna become a slut REAL soon if she isnt already, prob lose V to badboi, then quickly start riding C carousel, throwing a bunch of betabois away, probably start cheating, not take secs seriously, not take human life seriously, the way she THROWS LIVES AWAY, develop 10000 C stare, never be able to have a serious rel with a man, just like her crazy whore mother who cant love a man either.  but is this “beautifully flawed” woman trying to raise 3 young daughters as a Single Working Mom who is very open about Secs and Abortions and Being Tuff and You Do You Grrrrrl.

and its NORMAL to be a slut and cheat and break hearts and throw people away and get abortions, sex is FUN FIRST and if you get preggers, no big deal, get an abortion, WEVE ALL DONE IT. and sometimes you just wanna get fooked, and if the guy is a sensitive virgin type an gets feelings, AW, TOO BAD SO SAD, its ok to Dump and Ghost him because you just wanted to Get Off.

and we are beautiful in our flaws and we are gonna be as flawed as possible.

and i like the show for confronting Real Shit, but i hate it for taking the wrong opinion on this shit. while at the same time having some good and sympathetic characters. i mean i dont even really hate the mom. but i should.

to make her daughter feel better, the mother took her to the store and made her dress in a Ladies Business Suit, and said there you are, you look just like those successful peopel who have their shit together, youre no different than them. it was actually sort of touching even though she should not be so worried about career and shit. she should have a good father who helps her find a good husband.

i mean the show could have pushed more Red Pills about You Dont Have To Go To College. Go To Trade School or Community College or Military.

so they talk to a bank teller and mom says do you have any college, teller says no just a GED and i started this job at age 22 and im 25 now.

this could have opened a real good conversation but they just left it there.

so do you portray the bank teller as a failure because they didnt go to college? no not at all, which i liked.

i would have liked more if they had a 30 year old with a masters degree living with his family because he is still trying to pay back 200k in student loans hahahaha and he’s done, he’s finished, given up on life, i’ll never get anyway, i wish i could have a family but i’ll never afford it, and i havent dated a woman in over 5 years hahahahaha. that would have been some great black pill shit.

basically, college educated 30 year olds who cant afford to move out hahahaha because they are only making 12 dollars an hour and are 80k in debt for useless college hahahaha.

tfw when you see a picture of FENRIZ when he was very young, like 20 or 21 or so, and realize he sort of reminds you of THAT WOMAN.

I was completely in luv and wanted to marry and have babies and spend muh life with and was devastated heartbroken for 15 months over a woman who looks like FENRIZ.

fenriz is currently 44 years old as is nocturno culto. culto has 2 children a son and a daughter. i do not think fenriz has any children. not sure how old cultos children are. i hope he is a good father to them.

but yeah there are like 2 pictures of 20 year old fenriz where he kinda looks like That Woman. so weird. i told you she was kidna weird looking hahahahaha. but like fenriz, she had nice long dark hair.

so darkthrone was offered 200k USD to play a festival for one show and they REFUSED. hell yes that shows some serious “INTEGRITY” but at the same time i have to think, you’d have to be stupid to turn that down!

Should a man with CHILDREN turn down 200k for 1 day of work just because of his artistic integrity?

basically I give them a PASS, and I think its kinda STUPID for a man with a FAMILY to turn that money down. even if you dont have a family, you still need money. maybe fenriz has bastard children he needs to pay child support. (speculation). maybe fenriz wants to take care of his aging parents. TAKE THE FOOKIN MONEY GUIZE.

heh. most people just like the music and dont really care about the people behind it.

I dont really care for the music and i am MORE interested in the PEOPLE behind it hahahaha.

i mean the story of these guys lives is WAY more interesting than listening to “plaguewielder” or “the cult is alive” hehehehehehehehe.

i say this because i am sort of excited about darkthrone again due to their brand new album which I am going to listen to today on powerwalk hehehe.

did 3.2 mile, 1 hour powerwalk, my normal walking pace is 3.2 mph and i am happy with that.

listened to new darkthrone album. it has great sound/production and is perfect length and it is not all ridiculous, but uhhh i was hoping it would be a little…..better hehehehe. i mean its no panzerfaust. i mean you can tell they are both enjoying themselves, theyre not just going through the motions, so i think a large part of the prob is me simply not being able to appreciate “new” music.

its hard to get the interest of women when you MAKE LESS THAN THEM. of course im talking about money. basically the only people that I make MORE than are total white trash and negroes hahahahaha. at least when i was making 30k, i was then good enough to pull white trash waitresses and such hahahahaha. and that was the best money i ever made in my life! when i was making like 12k a year, i was staying sane but what the HELL can you do on 12k a year? cant live, cant have a family, cant do anything. cant have a serious rel with a woman. i guess you could bang sluts because you sure arent gonna KEEP any women making only 12k!

wow she dumped him SUPER BAD, super insult to injury there. why do people do this? why do you HAVE to add insult to injury? i mean if i were this guy i would be devastated, my confidence would be CRUSHED for at least 15 months hahahahaha. this type of thing will DESTROY a guys confidence for a LONG time.

also when someone throws you away, people advise you, they dont know what they had, in 2 months they will miss you and be begging for you back. dont take them back. be better than that. they took you for granted the first time. dont give them that second chance.

and that def never happened here. she left me and NEVER looked back. feels bad man! that might even be worse. i wuld def forgive and take her back once. and if she pulled the same shit twice (like they often do) then i would kick her ass out (probably not hahahahaha). but she didnt even come back.

but i am doing my interviews so thats as good as i can ask. i have done about 36 hours of interviews roughly. i guess it would make sense to do 40 hours of interviews. maybe what the lord is teaching me is how to get good at interviews. thats the lesson for this 15 months of pain. how to do interviews. sheeeeeeeeeeeeit.

but if i dont have an interview for a week, then i feel like i lose all those gains. and i need to have at least 2 or 3 interviews a week to get better. kinda like lifting hehehehe.

heh 330 pm and could totes take a nap. cuz i got up at 615am and did not fall asleep till 1 am.

 

super lengthy autistic post but an in depth picture of someone who actually DOES go to a shrink, and both people are willing to go to shrink, and it doesnt really improve things hehehehe. she still blames him.

but yeah he does seem too damn autistic and that is probably a problem.

also yeah she probably IS “depressed” but she should get that diagnosed well before 28. I sure did! because i was trying to improve myself so i could live a normal life with a job and a GF one day.

and good on this guy for improving himself from a fat virgin to an in shape, masters degree, successful, hardworking, guy with a GF. but he is still anal and autistic in a way that will hurt the rel, just as she hurts the rel with her “depression” and lack of interest and effort.

this album is regarded as DT coming back from a perhaps 3-album slump from 1996 to 2003 hahaha. fenriz said he was very derpressed and i guess was feeling better by the time of this album. and he was thankful to culto for essentially keeping the band alive during that time.

anyway i remember i actually bought the “plaguewielder” cd (used) back when cds were still a thing. i was like uhhhh this is not the greatest. and that was pretty much the end of darkthrone for me hahahaha and i never gave “hate them” a chance. i did give “sardonic wrath” a try and actually kinda liked that one. that came out following hate them.

anyway just trying to say i prefer this kind of vocal from culto. the hateful trve black metal vocal rather than the more i guess celtic frost vocal he’s doing now. which is not bad mind you, but the older vocal is better.

i mean there is no competition hehehe. however “boring” darkthrone may be, culto gives a Master Class in how to do good vocals.

62.9% labor force participation rate? that cant be good, unless labor force counts super old and super young people….which it probably shouldnt! and honestly i dont think it does. labor force is work age people. like 18 to 65 or whatever.

oh you know what i am not even gonna shit on plaguewielder anymore. it has shitty artwork but it sounds pretty similar to hate them with the riffage and sick vocals. also culto thanks tom waits on his short list of inspirations and shoutouts. in 2001 before i even knew who tom waits was unfortuantely. did not discover waits until 2003 or 4 at the latest.

also there are “blast beats” on these albums where i haven’t heard them on the newer albums. come on. you gotta have that.

trump scandal of him using “vulgar language about women.”

I DONT WANT A PRESIDENT WHO DOESNT USE VULGAR LANGUAGE TO TALK ABOUT WOMEN!!!!

crude comments in 2005 interview about tits and pussy and whatever. who cares.

well, i kinda care if he is cheating on his wife, but not sure if he was married to her by then.

cuz its not cool to cheat on your wife but he has dealt with his fair share of gold diggers so.

i mean this is fooking stupid and i hope it doesnt COST HIM the election just because WOMEN will be so butthurt. and women shouldnt even be able to vote hehehehehe. but people have short memories too.

even the circle wagons album does not sound BAD. it is quite rocking as a matter of fact.

lesson: even the “worst” darkthrone albums are pretty good.

i would have preffered that he make super racist comments about mudslims or blacks or especially joos. that would be SWEET. BUT, that definitely would have killed his chances 100%, and that would NOT be good.

i like that he didnt apologize THAT much. hes not begging for forgiveness, and kinda saying this is not a big deal. cuz its really not. but i really dont know how real women will take it. i know that msnbc is up in arms hahahaha.

why not criticize the hollywood host billy bush for being an enthusiastic participant in the conversation.

QUOTE

It’s foolish to take the Blackpill with regards to women. It makes you settle for low quality sluts and degenerates. Do you want them to be the mother of your children?

I was in a bad place in 2011. I was dating a used-up slut whom I had nothing in common with. I was struggling to finish school and leave the comfy world of NEETdom. I had gotten into reading ‘The Red Pill’ and that middle eastern rapist Roosh, and my opinion of women was extremely low. Thus, my expectations from women were low.

This girl was a degenerate waste. She was pretty enough, but was a complete slob, and nearing the end of her 20s. I knew she had dated around, but the extent of the rot was what really got to me. The day I left her was when I attended a ‘party’ with some of her friends, only to discover she had f00cked literally 8 of the men at the party. Her total number was somewhere around 35ish men. One of which included a ni99er. Disgusting. I drove off, deleted her from Facebook and Skype, and washed my hands of her.

I was lucky to get out of that mess with no STIs. I pulled myself out of this depression and blackpill by lifting and travelling, and completely tossed out the ReturnOfKangz/rOOSH shit. Some of the techniques are useful, and yes, 90% of women are somewhere on the whore spectrum, but 10% of girls is still a HUGE amount of people.

On one of my trips, after a year of lifting and healthy eating, I met a complete QT3.14, 10/10. She was introverted, shy, but extremely moral. She was 6 years younger than me, intelligent, had a similar genetic background, and was a fucking virgin.

Married her 2 years into the relationship and it has only gotten better.

Lift, have confidence in your self, resist the blackpill, and you will find extremely high quality women waiting for you to wife them. Let the f4ggot numales clean up the algae of used up whores. WILL TO POWER BRAH

END

i am risking getting banned for posting private forum material here, but uhhhh i wont say what forum i got it from, nor who said it, but i am trying to share an awesome WHITE PILL here: a neetish man was dating a dirty slut, then he turned his life around and married a nice virgin waifu. GOOD FOR HIM. this is EXACTLY the stuff I need to read a LOT more of…..but i’m not finding a lot of it. not enough.

nyquil and coffee combination hehehe. again went way over calorie limit. soooooo easy to eat over 1200 cals.

yeah why shouldnt i link this already.

this and TH are muh fav DT albums. and this one is more “fun.” not sure why the vocals are considered controversial. i think they are great although perhaps mixed a little loudly. the riffs, songwriting, and production are all top of the line, and there is a ton of nostalgia with this album, as it was a big part of muh adolescence at age 18 or so. this is a pretty kewl album to have as your theme music at age 18 hahahahahahahaha.

“quintessence”, come on. probably the darkthrone stairway to heaven right there.

but yeah. a lot of people are interested in things they dont really participate in. politics, professional sports, tv shows, religion. but no one is interested in “relationships” as like a main interest they way I am, apart from WOMEN who are always GOSSIPING. I truly do like to gossip, but I like even more to study and understand the relationships.

its like watching from the sidelines and commenting but never participating. but thats the thing: is that normies DO participate, quite regularly, and dont really comment on it at the same level as I do, just gossip, say whos fooking who, whos dumping who.

and even people who are obsessed with sportsball and watch pro sportsball but are too fat and soft to actually play pro sportsball still often play amateur sportsball or fantasy sportsball.

i dont play Fantasy Relships, although maybe in a way I do: by having these one sided things where I have the relship all in my mind and it does not reflect reality at all.

nyquil makes me unable to think clearly and articulate and be persuasive. still i wish i just had some MJ, i would LUV to smoke a bunch of MJ on a friday night like this and listen to DARKTHRONE.

“the hordes of nebulah”. i used to think this song wasnt as good as the 2 before it, now i see i was wrong hahahahaha. truly a MAGIC album and i wouldnt EXPECT darkthrone to ever capture this kind of lightning in a bottle quite the same way ever again. you cant. again a large part of this was my own age at the time. but this is gonna be one of those albums that i enjoy thru my entire life hahaha. share with muh waifu and children and they will say damn what a badass!

anyway it is just “funny” and mostly sad that i spend all this time and energy and interest thinking about and analyzing Relationships, general and particular, myself and my fantasy rels, others and my perceptions of their real rels, and i think i have the tools and skills and knowledge to be real mature and good in a rel…..but my weakness is the BEGINNING. I cant get it STARTED for various reasons. cant spark the kindling and get the fire going ever.

large part of that is because i am scared to “apply”. at least with jobs i am putting out 450 applications, doing 23 interviews. if i were doing that with WOMEN, i WOULD have been in a real rel by now, or at least had a near normie level of secsual satisfaction. or, hopefully, i would say THIS IS DEGENERATE, I’m not gonna do this unless its in a real rel with a decent woman, fook this banging sluts shit, leave it to the degenerate hedonist nihilist abortionists.

fenriz did recycle the classic “quintessence” riff on his storm “nordavind” album which was recorded in late 1994 while panzerfaust was recorded in early 1994 hehehe.

they got the qt gurl kari rueslatten to sing on the album (from 3rd and the mortal, really need to dig into them more) and supposedly she was very upset and felt betrayed by fenriz because he changed a lyric at the last minute to say something like “death to every man who does not hail the fatherland!” which she felt was ebil racist. and i bet fenriz is not a racist. shit i wish he WAS. he SHOULD be. and poor kari felt horrible guilt after that and betrayed by ebil fenriz. hahahahaha i wonder if he fooked her. the dirty slut hahaha. see this ALL comes from the root cause of my degen pornographic view of women as sluts to be fooked. this is from watching way too much pron, so shame on me. but also shame on women for willingly BEING like that. they dont have to BE sluts, even if the girls in porno are.

and because kari was a beautiful young norwegian gurl with beautiful long hair, i dont WANT her to be a slut.

i want to read more stories of women who are DIVORCING or DUMPING their men because oh god hes a TRUMP SUPPORTER. but r/relships does not allow overtly political topics.

i would think being married and especially with children makes women less leftist catladylike. so they will say oh yeah trump is crude but oh well hes still better than hillary so im still voting for him.

whereas its the C carousel sluts and catladies who will be most offended, and they werent voting for trump ANYWAY.

in other words, its not gonna lose him any votes. its not gonna make anyone who has already chosen trump, say, oh NOW he’s gone too far, and i am changing my vote to HILLARY? i cant imagine him honestly doing any of that. even if he said GTKRWN 1488, which i would luv, people would still say, yeah im still not voting for hillary.

however it will make the hillary people all the more SHRILL and ANNOYING and that might push undecideds towards trump.

undecideds tho? and couldnt this push undecideds to hillary? sure.

BUT HOW MANY UNDECIDEDS ARE THERE REALLY?????

not very many imho. i play it down because i hang out with people who would be MORTIFIED that they have even ONE trump supporter in their friend circle. so i say stuff, ah well, its a classic lesser of two evils thing, i dont really like either of them, but im really dont like hillary, yes i agree with you trump is not super presidential but im a moderate centrist and hillary is just too left for me, so, i have to vote for trump. that kind of waffling shit. actually i wouldnt even confirm i was voting for trump unless i was with some trump voters. thankfully i know a few.

7000 words? damn.

but yeah its funny. i analyze and think about rels like An Interest Or Hobby but never actually participate, when most NORMIES DO participate and dont analyze them to the same level, its just a normal part of normal life, dont overthink it, its not something interesting like football or tv hahahaha.

well to me it is!!!!!!!!

and women arent much better than men. they gossip a lot more about rels but are even WORSE at analysing, understanding, and workign with them. men could at least have a good chance at reasoning their way through them if they tried.

but you cant REASON with women. its like REASONING with a drunk 50 foot baby with a flamethrower. REASONING with a damn tasmanian devil. you cant reason somebody out of something that they didnt reason themselves into, hahahahaha.

STRUGGLE WITHOUT CUDDLES

aug 3

wewlad. well had a big interview yesterday and today i had a “market research” study for 2 hours of “work” for which i get paid $200. sign me up to do this as muh job. give me a firm 40 hahahaha.

it was really very interesting and fun and positive. there were people from fookin STANFORD there. attractive young stanford business students, who were going to become powerful career women and executives, yet some of them just seemed like perky young college students to me. early 20s girls, some of whom looked vaguely Jooish. the type of gurls you see at Serious Colleges. they are always young and always in good shape and always pretend to be smart, rather than big fat burger white trash proles with their fast food guts and tattoos and filthy mouths.  i am a sucker for these midde class gurls. I dont see a lot of them because i dont spend a lot of time around universities, or in workplaces where professional young women are employed hahahaha. but they are definitely attractive. very bangable.

and everyone was very nice and welcoming. sure its fake but i dont care. i will take somebody being fake nice over somebody being whatever. besides, on the level of our interaction, it wasnt really fake fake. i know that drives the autists crazy which is why they HATE small talk and “fake” niceness etc, everything has to be all deep conversations all the time with these autists, and then they wonder why they are depressed autistic virgin neets hahahaha.

they were just successful normies who had no reason to be mean, and its part of their job to be nice and get The Consumers Talking. And I was happy to oblige.

The whole thing was not what I expected. This was all some HIGH END stuff. People from STANFORD. Stanford BUsiness School working on some sort of collaborative project at World Headquarters of a very large well known company located somewhat near me. about 20 miles travel hehehe. going downtown.  the kind of company real big winners work at. which professional good college student boys and girls try to get summer internships at.

there was art on the walls about the power of disruptive thinking and how to be a real change agent. one mural making fun of traditional business type “orthodoxy” and how this company was gonna turn that on its ear and make itself a real Change Agent getting the best Thinkers and Talent to market their products. There were several copies of this SETH GODIN book sitting on the table for the participants to read. I was probably the only one who knew who he is. Notes: I shold probably read some of his books to learn how to speak the bullshit language of business and marketing. SPeak the language of a Value Adder who is WORTH 28k a year hahahaha. which the young professionals I spoke to today definitely made, hehehe. or they were getting a damn executive mba from a top ten biz school where they would then enter into a 150k a year mid manager position.

I was studying them even more than they were studying me. I thought they were going to ask about uber cars. but they didnt at all. They were asking about feelings and emotions and telling specific stories about times I felt more or less “fearless.” I do not have many specific stories because I have not been living life for the past 2 or 3 years or so hahahaha. it then seemed like these teams of researchers were studying ways of interviewing and communicating during interviews. like how can an interviewer structure and guide an interview in the most productive way.

there were little “breakout” sessions where I talked with groups of people for 10 minutes or so. As I did a few more I got more comfortable, less autistic.  then I talked with two people, and our conversation was watched by like 4 or 5 other Stanford Researchers, and we started off doing a “Bad Interview”, then they sent me off, talked amongst themeslves, but I could hear them talking, then called me back to do a “Good Interview”, which really didn’t seem that much different. Like I guess they were supposed to be assholes in the first situation and then nice and open and friendly the second time. but everyone was pretty nice all around.

Then I talked to a real Ubermensch Hyperborean. He was like 27 years old, like 6 foot 3 at least, wearing good clothes, very handsome, very charming, total UberChad. Normally I am suspicious of these guys because they used to make fun of me in high school and they were always the popular chads who all the women chose over short quiet dorks like me hahaha.

but i have become less autistic over the years and he was very nice to me and i was very nice back to him.

one of the Stanford Researchers seemed more autistic and awkward than me!

well, maybe he worked for the Big Company. The big company is very prestigious too, but you don’t have to go to STANFORD to get a job there. You could be a good student at Cal State and get a job there.

but yeah it was exciting seeing these young college gurls. some were quite attractive and I wanted to bang them. but they were both way too young AND way too successful for me. and way too attractive. but here they are being super nice to me and paying me 100 bucks an hour. literally.

how the hell did i get this? because I signed up for a local Market Research Firm like 8 years ago and every once in a while they contact me for big on-site projects with their Big Client, ie this Big Company.  and this one happened to be at world HQ of this big company, and is the most high-profile, high-paying, classy type project I have done so far. This does NOT happen often folks. like once a year or once every 2 years. and often I get DQ’d because I am too old or I dont have perfect 20 20 vision or I dont have a Smart Phone. I got DQ’d from one because I still use an oldschool nonsmart Flip Phone, like all Trump voters hahahahahaha.

it was all interesting and exciting and fun, but I felt ultimately useless, and it was ridiculous these beautiful smart successful normies could make great money doing this “research”. they probably have relationships with people theyre attracted to too hahahaha. well their GF probably cucks them then. well not if they are making 80, 100k a year, or going to STANFORD! so they get the bitchy career gurl as a GF. I mean of course she will ultimately divorce them, but they will get a few good years of monogamous bangs out of her when she is young and beautiful, and that’s worth a lot!

the participants were dumb white proles hahahahaha. no only semi kidding. but i mean who is available during a Workday to do a Survey? Pill Popping jobless white trash, and thuggish nonwhite trash, who would probably rather sell drugs than do a research survey. or forget to show up. there was a potatoe shaped white woman with a broken arm and ugly tattoos on her arm. There were 45 year old white women with some tattoos on their arms. There was a 40 or 37 year old woman who I wanted to bang. very nice legs and body. I should have charmed her. she walked funny as if she had an injury and she gave off a very crazy vibe. she wasnt super hot, but she was DEF hot enough.

i mean if she were being super nice to me like these researchers were, yeah I would like that hahahaha.

this ties into something i realized recently: it doesnt take much for me to generate interest in a person. if they are NICE to me, that’s generally enough. just be nice to me and be good at talking to me hahahaha. which is these researchers JOB, to get me talking. Now I am good at rambling once you get me talking.

but yeah add a little NICENESS in with that, like smile and be nice and dont be a bitch, and then you will have worked your way into muh heart. show some interest in me and dont bust muh balls or judge me. its not that hard, ladies hahahahahahahahahahahahaha

but yeah that is too much to ask of a woman because as a man, it’s YOUR job to LEAD. in life, in conversations, in everything, and I’ve never been good at taking the LEAD.

now one of the women participants was wearing what looked like a JOOISH star of david. she was in her 40s but in quite good shape. probably would bang. would def not marry hahahahaha. I tried to study her face for signs of jooishness. because all jooish women get nose jobs hahahaha.

pretty sure at least one of the cute young gurl professionals was jooish. had reddish hair and kind of pasty skin. not sure about the KHAZAR MILKERS hahahahahahaha.

yeah i mean not all jooish women are disgusting sea hags, some are very cute, I’m ashamed to say. would race mix with /10.

i should have talked to her about it hahahaha.

pretty sure one of the male researchers I talked to was a J. had a very jooish name on his nametag.

its exciting for me because I met a ton of joos when I was at Jooniversity but not since then. I simply do not live in that kind of upper middle class neighborhood, nor have I worked in Professional 50k+ workplaces where Joos would have their Careers. I have no contact with them. I just read about them and listen to TRS podcasts about how horrible they are hahahahahahahaha.

yeah I will never soften on that, but I wouldn’t mind banging a few of those young jooish qts before THROWING THEM IN THE OVEN hahahahaha.

but seriously folks it wuldnt be that hard for them to get a get out of the oven pass from me. just be NICE to me.

i mean im really not THAT hateful, i really CAN get along with Marketing Research people very well! Who are nice to me and make an effort to pull muh talk string. Well, I mean, they dont even need to pull my talk string, really all they need to do is ask me ONE open ended question to get me started, then I could Ramble On for an hour. not that hard.

like i say, i was quickly warming up to the Big Chad Guy just because he was NICE to me.

and im not used to attractive women being nice to me. i mean i just appreciate niceness. if someone is blatantly nice to me, i really appreciate it. that was a big reason me and that woman became friends. because she was just super nice to me and very easy to talk to. i enjoy being nice to people but because i am an autist neet, i seem cold and aloof. but i really enjoy being nice. i sometimes need people to break the ice though. and she did, and she was super nice to me, and i was super nice to her, and we became friends, and after a while, i trusted her and liked her more, and appreciated her niceness more and more, and then i wanted her to be nice to me in a different way, which she couldnt, and then all the niceness was gone entirely.

i appreciate men being nice too. i like nice men too hahahahahaha.

but yeah it DOES take EFFORT to be nice, so it might not be considered super EASY. although sometimes it is easy.

like the people i meet every week for my social event, we get along fine, but we arent super NICE to each other.

also i was reminded how i dont have any STORIES, because I dont get out and LIVE LIFE. I dont DO THINGS, I dont TAKE ACTION, I dont have deep relationships with people, or even exciting ones where story-worthy things happen. i don’t mind being a BORING WALLFLOWER, but I would like to have a FEW more stories. I mean I have that story about That Person but that’s just a PATHETIC story that makes me look like a total WEIRDO….which I kinda am!

Cuz the market researchers were i think studying real high level meta shit, like How People Tell Stories and How People Communicate and How to Get People To Tell Stories about Times When and How To Lead a Productive Interview. Yes it IS pretty interesting stuff!  I would have liked to stay LONGER and I would be happy to give them more in depth stuff. I would sit in a room and just talk for an HOUR if they wanted. SHIT, its a lot more fun than INTERVIEWING. cuz there you are being judged mercilessly, rejected, not being paid anything, and though interviewers are generally nice, they arent SUPER nice like the marketers. i mean you feel like you are being pampered, and people are INTERESTED in you and your stupid rambling opinions are VALUABLE. And they are really suckin your D. I LIKE THAT! Even if I know my opinions dont matter, and their research is shit. I like having nice qt young gurls sucking muh D saying OH THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

oh even nice handsome Chad Men, where in the Real World I could never hope to have their Sloppy Seconds!

and i dont really see it as fake, because this is part of their job, and for the most part, they enjoy their chosen career. they are a good fit for this sort of work. they are people people who are interested in watching and talking to people.

I enjoy people watching a lot as well, but the people interacting is difficult for me. If I were less Anxious and INtroverted, I would have been a pretty good Marketer and could see myself attracted to that sort of career. fookin normie extraverts, with attractive gfs. attractive men and attractive women. they dress well, are well-liked, live in nice neighborhoods, have careers not jobs, they went to University, total middle class. shiny happy people. beautiful people.

then at 35 their wife divorces them and sets them on their way to a midlife crisis hahaha. but before the women turn 30, it’s all good times. and there were definitely a few “junior level” under 30 women there. probably sucking dick to get to the top hahahahaha. i mean i would have no chance with these 25 year old women. they are dating their damn 40 year old boss. after his wife divorces him hahahaha no problem he just hooks up with a 24 year old gurl with a shiny new MBA.  she also works out and isnt a fat potato who has let herself go.

shit yeah i notice all the fat people vs nonfat people. as a sorta fat person who is becoming a nonfat person. And I definitely want a nonfat waifu. That Woman had a nice big bottom and thighs but she was not fat or overweight at all.

i have never gotten feelings for a fat or even Overweight gurl, so I figure I owe it to them to not be fat myself hahahaha. or not overweight.

anyway the seth godin book was called your turn is now or waiting for your turn and it was actually not bad, i think it was partially successful in its goal to inspire and motivate, that J is good at his chosen profession hahahaah.

this is the kind of place that has no dress code, probably listen to a ted talk every morning, have team huddles, get gym membership and probably very very good benefits, i mean this is a destination career. young achievers with nononline MBAs who wear skinny jeans and i dunno joy division or velvet underground shirts in the office. maybe even have a mohawk. absolutely rides a bike to work and lives in a hipster neighborhood right on the cusp of Gentrification, and also do a lot of pro-nonwhite nonprofit volunteering to assuage their white swpl guily. VERY SWPLy and hipstery for sure.

but also nice and good people skills because they are Extravert Marketers and not total Weirdo Autists. these poeple are def NOT neet virgins. they are DEFINITELY not nevergf or foreveralone. they are socially well adjusted hahaha.

and not so far out they actually make their career in Nonprofits and Activism. That’s a whole other bunch of hipsters.

so i would have no chance with the young stanford jooish cuties, and my 1488 bruders would hang me for admitting to finding any joos attractive, so I simply wouldn’t flaunt it around them. i certainly would not want to marry or have babies with these gurls.

but what if they were really nice to me? over the long term? and loyal and devoted to me?

heh these issues came up in the study. there was stuff like talk about what it means to you for someone to have your back, and alot of the stuff led naturally into talking about relships, the closer and more important the relship, the better. I bet the normies would be led quite easily to telling stories about their GF or BF. a special relationship with someone who is important to you. and I spoke of how those kind of relationships are important to me…….but I dont have any recent stories to tell you.  and there is talk of personalities and fit and im an introvert and dont mingle with new people a lot, but I do enjoy close connections bla bla bla and really talking about some pretty serious issues!

then ding ding time is up, move to the other group! i felt they cut us off just as things were getting interesting.

definitely a very interesting afternoon, the most interesting “market research” thing I’ve done probably ever hahahaha. a lot more fun than mturk or even talking about a damn product. there was hardly any talk of products or services. usually in those cases i just laugh and say whatever i’m really easy to please. just give me a good product at a fair price. hell not even a fair price. and also a company that doesn’t bullshit its customers, or bullshit its employees, and is loyal to its employees, hires from within, doesnt add more and more retarded managers that dont know shit but how to lay off good workers to save a buck.

maybe this is my sign to buy a seth godin book and memorize the bullshit phrases hahaha.

and i am going back there tomorrow! i will try to stay after tomorrow to talk to the people more. see if i can sign up for moar studies. i mean these people are paying me GOOD MONEY essentially have fun and do interesting things where people are super nice to me. SIGN ME UP! I could do this 80 hours a week! for 100 dollars an hour hahaha.

also if i see that crazy 40 year old woman with the nice legs tomorrow i should Chat Her Up hahahaha and try to have short term casual secs with her. she did not have any visible tattoos, which was more than I could say for some of the other women, and she did not look like a potato. that is very important to me hahahaha.

also these bigshots didnt seem THAT much smarter than me. if they can make 100k a year, I can surely make 30k a year. they just had more confidence, and more experience in the normie world of confidence and success and GFs and sheeeit hahaha.

ok found this cute gurl on linkedin who was part of the research today. holy sheet sheet is jooish as HELL with one of the most jooish names you could imagine. need hearing protection for those echoes. she got a BS in 2014 from CORNELL in “design and environmental analysis.” which is probably “organizational studies” which is probably just “HR” for IVY LEAGUE joos such as her.

god damn. she was cute though, I wanted to plow her and maybe even cuddle with her.

but life is a constant struggle with no cuddles.

STRUGGLE WITH NO CUDDLES.

heres another guy in her dept, 2014 bachelors from not an ivy league but a pretty respectable private college in the state, useless degree like me, but lots of good internships and “apprenticeships” preparing him for this role. fellowships and shit. jooish name too. had the same fellowship as the gurl. i am sure they fooked, but do they still fook? probably.

another young woman, possibly latina, BA degree from state college in 2013. no masters degrees here! this state college was my univs main rival and my univ was seen as intellectually and professionally superior to those Boorish Fraternity Business Majors who just want to get drunk and bang sluts and get an easy business degree. total chads.

alot of these people did useless BA’s in psychology, sociology, anthropology. even human resources and hospitality is less useless than those! but the common denominator is, they went to decent, and sometimes outstanding schools, AND, more important, were VERY active in building their resume throughout college with internships and programs that look really good on a resume, which got them into GOOD jobs with this big company, as 2014 undergrads, with no masters degree. it was the internships that did it. they were moving and shaking. that is exactly where I failed.

yeah these kids are like NINE years younger than me, theyre even younger than That Woman. hehehehe. and they are WAY ahead of where I will EVER be, because they made the right moves during college, and I did not. and I can’t make myself young again to make those right moves the first time. these jobs are BUILT for YOUNG high acheivers on the fast track. I ALMOST got on the fast track, and I could have very realistically been there like them. But I missed it. I didn’t even know how to get on it. I had no idea internships were so IMPORTANT.

but its what separates young huge winners like them, from old huge losers like me.

sheeeeit i gotta get muh stuff ready for my interview for the 12k a year job tomorrow hahahaha. and these KIDS are making i dunno 60k a year with potential for a LOT more in the future. and they had useless degrees too! they just did a bunch of really good internships all the way from freshman year.  while i just smoked MJ and got angry that I couldn’t make friends and get a GF hahahahaha. and slacked muh studies and DIDNT EVEN TRY to get internships. I DIDNT EVEN TRY. partially because I HAD NO IDEA. I dont come from that world and no one I know does. NOBODY TOLD ME because nobody I knew KNEW what you had to do. Muh fam is more working class and doesnt know how to succeed in college. We thought that doing ok and graduating is enough. IT ISNT.

but joos from middle class families, their middle class jooish family and JCC makes sure they are on track every year of their lives, because they udnestand the important of getting on the fast track early, and once you miss it, you dont really get a second chance. i mean a 40 year old man who got an online mba is not gonna get these same “entry level” jobs that a 22 year old grad from cornell with a prestigious yearly City Revitalization fellowship is gonna get.

so am i man enough to Game N Bang that 22 year old jooish qt Cornell Grad hahahahaha would that make me feel IN CHARGE, make me feel like a BIG IMPORTANT EXPANSIVE MAN? would that make me feel confident, powerful, and FEARLESS? yeah it would hahahaha tbhfam. it would feel real good.

at one time, like at age 18 or so, i was on that level too. i just fooked up and she didnt. not just her but many people like her. successful, high achieving, fast track ubernormies. they have good social skills and good career skills and were never put off track by their own damn personal issues and insecurities and weaknesses. and they worked hard, their earned what they got, im not begrudging them that. I’m begrudging myself for letting myself get off track when i was young. because i couldnt handle my own not very difficult life. because i should just went to a damn SHRINK but i was too STUBBORN.

i could have gone to a shrink for “free” at muh university. but i was too STUPID, STUBBORN, and IMMATURE.

anyway i will ask the nice smart qt jooish gurl tomorrow if I can sign up with this office for future stuff like this. you dont need to go through that marketing firm, you can contact me directly. and also wanna go to the mikva and talk about mitzvahs and tikkun olam. hahahahahahahahahaha. im sure your jooish BF wont mind if you get a little side GOYMEAT.

sheeeeit getting up at 620 am tomorrow to do damn interview.

i looked at 3 of the people involved with the “ideas lab” on linkedin and one of them looked at my profile in return. not the qt jooish genius gurl. but the not super attractive latina gurl. she is a year older and still 8 or 9 years younger than me and is like a manager or supervisor there hahahaha. ive never supervised anybody or been promoted anywhere hahaha. shes i dunno i didnt get a good look at her at the thing today. she’s under 25 so that automatically makes her HAWT right? I know she wasnt morbidly obese because nobody there is. but how potatoey is she? well everyone there is very image conscious, which means they care about not being fat, which is good hahahaha. i wish all prole women werent fat and trashy hahaha. we have to MAKE PROLES GREAT AGAIN.

its where i come from and what i identify as, but i hate how so many white proles are white trash. it really made me want to Become Middle Class. I liked the Classy Image of it all. the beautiful people, smart and sophisticated, even the WOMEN. the women read books and paid attention to current events and didnt have horrible tattoos and werent fat hahahaha.

but really i can speak both languages to an extent. well…..a very small extent hahahaha. i can speak middle class better than average proles can hahahaha. and i can probably speak prole better than average middle class can. i have ALWAYS been straddling these two worlds.

white trashcan hahahahaha

when i talked to the first set of people today i was very awkward and weird. after talking to several groups i had gotten markedly better, or at least felt more confident, whcih is all that really matters. marketing research proves it hahaha. science. and other jooish lies hahahahahahahaha.

that sweet little jooish gurl probably DOESNT EVEN REALIZE how EVIL her people are. in fact maybe her family is one of The Good Ones.

you think im so antisemitic because I “dated” a jooish gurl 10 years ago, she broke my heart, I got buttmad, it wasnt even a real relationship, it was a 1 month casual thing, i was stupid to get feelings, so NOW I H8 JOOS.

not so! what it DID do was make me interested in joos. studying this Interesting, Fascinating Race. It wasnt until after a few years of studying how horrible they were that I came to h8 da joos. and again i would probably be VERY lenient if young qt jooish gurls were being NICE to me. they can go in the oven last hahahahahaha.

i KNEW she looked jooish hahahahaha. glad to see my joodar still works.

no, she did not have a hideous face like khazar milkers.

also i fully admit that I was an idiot with the jooish gurl 10 years ago. i shouldnt have gotten feelings, i should have just accepted it was a casual thing….but i just cant do that. no i wasnt an IDIOT. I just dont like DEGENERATE casual secs! and joos do hahaha. but in her defense she wasnt terrible mean about it. she was nice and sympathetic when she dumped me. which is a lot more than i can say about that white woman of 2015!!!!!!!!!!!!

but thats the thing. even if this 22 year old jooish gurl is not bad……what is she gonna be like when she is 44, 66? probably acting and looking more jooish. maybe start going to temple or whatever they call it. and how often did she go to JCC during high school? do jooish stuff during college? i didnt see any blatantly jooish stuff on her linkedin resume tho. well she had such a good resume she didnt NEED to put any joo stuff on it, she probably did that stuff ANYWAY because she is a high energy high achiever. worked in joocamp during high school. too long ago to put on res.

also what about her GRANDPARENTS. all joos luv their grandparents and no doubt they have some stories of the CAMPZ and the EBUL NAHTZEES and the OVENZ and the CAMPZ and the SOAP and LAMPSHADES, OY VEY, WHAT A SHOAH.

and beloved grandparents telling those stories to little children can make a big impression.

well why would old grannies LIE about OVENS?

because theyre hysterical and they dont even KNOW theyre lying. you know how some people have really BAD memories and they EXAGGERATE and BULLSHIT.

also i dont doubt there were CAMPS of some sort. i just doubt they were the lean mean joo genociding machines that elie wiesel would have us believe.

maybe i should talk about all this with that jooish gurl tomorrow hahahahaha.

so yeah i can have a failrly normie conversation with people…..it just takes a few attempts to get in the groove. like when i was taking my calls, many of my calls i handled REALLY WELL. i wish i had recorded them. just recorded them all. they did have recordings of all calls but damned if i had access to them.

but when i meet someone for the FIRST TIME, or I have a JOB INTERVIEW, yeah its gonna be a little awkward. why cant these normies just accept that?

like if they gave me a chance and worked with me for a few days, well i would probably act more normie.

well, i mean jobs and interviews, you are iherenlty being judged and evaluated at ALL TIMES, so yeah that puts you on edge.

who DOES make GOOD decisions under pressure? pressure compromises your decision making quality! yeah i can make decisions but theyre not gonna be GREAT!

also, re that woman, why couldnt she look for the GOOD in me? she used to. and the good stuff never really LEFT. I never really changed THAT much. i was still the same good person, i just had these new feelings. why did she ONLY see the BAD, that she couldnt see the GOOD any more at ALL? so yeah that sucks.

look for the good, you used to see the good. its still there. i never wanted to become a bad person. but thats how you treated me! just as bad as losing you is the thought that omg, AM I A BAD PERSON? because I just cant live with that. I do not have much confidence but I used to be somewhat confident I was a GOOD PERSON. I can’t lose that sense of certainty, then Ive lost ALL I GOT.  so losing that was almost as bad as losing HER!

http://www.bloomberg.com/view/articles/2016-08-03/why-millennials-are-having-less-sex

aug 4

had 9 am interview, got it done with, it was actually very good, they said i was very articulate and a good communicator, which  i was happy to hear, since a lot time i worry about sounding like a retarded autist. but sometimes i can Communicate well, ie BUllshit well, its really the ONLY skill i have and the only way I will sell myself for 12k a year hahahaha

OOOOOOOOOO LOOK AT ME, I MAKE THIRTY THOUSAND DOLLARS A YEAR, IM SO IMPORTANT!

http://washingtonmonthly.com/magazine/junejulyaug-2015/the-post-ownership-society/

swpl phaggot writing in leftist mag but he makes some good points about Working For A Living for us shitty nonstem grads hahahaha. not he but she. she also had stupid false points about women being financially devastated by divorce hahahaha yeah right.

i dunno. be sure to read the comments of courshe.

i mean yeah she and many other like her made bad choices as youth which led to them being financially not so good as adults. they shouldnt have taken on 100k in debt in useless degrees.

and i can sympathize because i am also a member of the Bad Life Choices club and now i am Asshurt about it. bitching and moaning that the world owes me a 28k a year job hahahahaha.

yeah it sucks, but at least i am not a leftist communist like the author and her fook buddies. but some of the communists had good points about international bankers hahahaha. and i dont like free markets when they hurt a nation or a RACE. The White Race. I am STAUNCHLY pro-white, unlike this author and her bohemian starving artist friends. but i too am an older millennial and will likely still be Not Making It at Age 35. which is not far away hehehe.

its sorta ok when youre 25 (and even then not ideal, and wouldnt happen in my amerka hahaha), but by 35 youre like holy shit ive wasted my life, ive made a huge mistake, i should just K myself now hahahaha.

i went in to do the interview, got a better look at the facility at the millions of dollars of machinery they have. i mean i honestly think what this place is doing is legit awesome and great, no bullshit. it is training long term unemployed people the skills they need as quickly as possible to get 30k+ jobs. to fill real skills gaps in manufacturing jobs. because the only manufacturing that is left is “advanced manuacturing” and requires more training. and companies dont train. you have to pay to train yourself at a skool. and the supply of that training is very limited, hidden almost. i mean you can pay 14 THOUSAND dollars to take 6 months of training at HVAC skool so you can make 15 dollars an hour there…..or you can pay i dunno less than 7 thousand dollars to get trained on fookin expensive robot machines and make 20 dollars an hour.

they showed me around and there were a bunch of white people getting schooled there. these are jobs for a strong white working class that is an endangered species…..and this place is DIRECTLY acting to fix that. I could not find a more pro-white job or place! they might as well have a huge industrial size OVEN in there where they shovel in joos and blaqs and muzzies and mudsharks and traitors!

if i were faced with an enemy and a traitor and I had but one bullet left, I would let the traitor have it hahahahahaha

I tried to emphasize that I really liked that sort of stuff and would possibly like to become a student here.  i’m not sure they understood how serious i was. but they said i was very articulate in general. i even seemed SO articulate that they asked how I got that way hahahaha. so i said thank you, strong communication is very important to me, and ive tried to improve myself in that area, so it’s good to hear it’s working.

i mean if anything this is a SIGN FROM GOD that I should GET TRAINING AT THIS PLACE on one of the fooking million dollar robot machines!!!!! they get millions of dollars from FEDGOV! literally! department of labor grants which sounds like one thing fedgov is actually doing right with taxpayer money! unless its all theater, a scam. like spending millions to help black keeds graduate high school.

well this shit is more important than high school!!!!!!!! and its manufacturing!!!!! actually building stuff!!!! honest actual work!!!!

these jobs exist but they cant find people to fill them because the Shop Rats dont know such high tech machines! and since companies wont train their own people….they get this facility to train them!!!! getting fedgov and i’m sure state and county money as well. and it is basically a part of the local college. but their training is VERY job oriented.

i mean its the ONE THING that doesnt look like a huge scam to me!

they only thing stopping me is that you have to call them for more information. because you cant just sign up for A Class. but i am fookin afraid to call them. even though i have had TWO INTERVIEWS with them.

that seth godin book caught my attention because it had a bit about staying in your comfort zone, because you are AFRAID to look STUPID. so you dont take risks and do new things. i def understand that. and when it is an everyday part of your job to not look stupid in front of customers, but you feel stupid as fook, you feel INCOMPETENT and STUPID, and then they get mad at you becuase shouldnt you know this shit, but to be PROPERLY trained is WAYYYYYYYYY more expensive than mass hiring and mass hiring.

yeah it does suck to always feel STUPID. anyone would try to avoid that. but whats even worse is coworkers and customers thinking youre stupid and judging you for it! treating you like youre stupid!

IM NOT STUPID, this stuff is just insanely complicated! I went to STANFORD!!!!

and it doesnt really matter how SMART you are, but how good you are at dealing with unexpected weird shit under pressure. they should teach classes in that. with plenty of hands on field work.

you could be smart and flunk out because you couldnt handle weird shit under pressure.

being smart HELPS sure, but not as much as being cool under pressure.

i mean why am i NOT getting training at this place? I mean its actually a possibility for me to take a 22 week intensive training course! cuz i got no job and have the PRIVILEGE of living with family!

basically they need places like this INSTEAD OF HIGH SCHOOL. START KIDS on this when they are 14 years old so that they are 18 they are trained to do fookin 35k a year jobs. THEN see if so many damn people want to go to college. and a lot of them who do go are gonna do serious STEM shit because they are naturally interested in these damn machines that they can ALREADY make a good living with. and now they want to research and develop new types of machines. innovation and growth hahahaha.

lincoln tech is like a univ of phoenix of this sort of stuff. and if you are gonna go in debt for training….get the training in something useful. so i respect lincoln tech a lot more than phoenix. because they are actually giving a useful product.  god damn that recent univ phoenix commercial is awful. they all are. the one with the workaholic young woman studying till Closing Time at the library because Sleep is not Required to get an awesome education or social work career.

yeah well smart people would rather sleep, than spend 60 grand AND every waking minute, to get a job that pays 10k a year. which you didnt need the degree for anyway.

and if youre an autist or awkward, forget it, you are doomed to a life of neetness, becuase how are you gonna actually GET a job and not totally shit the bed at an interview?

previous generations, you could have NO social skills and still get a job. as a mail clerk, or as a Machine Operator. well there are still sweet machine operator jobs out there, but to get the ones that pay more than 10 DAH, you have to have Advanced Training. so the problem is, where are you gonna find that training.  at places like this place i had 2 interviews for. where the best thing was a 14 dollar an hour part time temporary job. but the STUDENTS are getting prepared for like 18 dollar an hour full time permanent manufacturing jobs. the next step seems like a no brainer eh?

i mean this is what i would do with black ghettos. i would transform all high schools and get the keeds into hardcore job training as young as possible. there are blacks in these robot training programs. they are smart enough to handle it, believe it or not. you dont need to be a genius! you just need the right training!

some people say training is useless, well i say some “training” is useless, but REAL, useful training is RIDICULOUS VALUABLE!!!!!!

which means you cant cut corners on training and you should have jeez at least 120 hours of training.

FOOOOOOK got rejected from the college police job, the big lifechanger job. well at least they let me know within TWO DAYS.

A MAN CANNOT CREATE LIFE AND A WOMAN CANNOT MAINTAIN LIFE, said this guy on a mgtow video. i thought that was pretty good.

but yeah that honestly SUCKS about that job. that would have been a YUUUGE deal. 49k a year are you KIDDING me? I could actually have a FAMILY! with a stay at home tradwaifu homeschool muh children!!!!!!

lot harder to do that on 12k a year hahahaha. well they might not offer me the job either.

http://dschool.stanford.edu/

ok its not stanford business school thats doing this project, its the “d.school”.  its business related but also in a gay people way, like positive disruption and radical collaboration and things that dont even make sense to normie proles and is really only intended for the type of Privileged Middle Class Idealists that would go to Stanford.

http://dschool.stanford.edu/our-team/

i mean look at all these happy smiling J’s making tons of money being progressive and disruptive and collaborative and innovative thought leaders hahaha.

DEEP CONSUMER ETHNOGRAPHY oh lord hahahaha see you cant get this in your basic bitch mba program hahahaha you have to go somewhere ELITE like stanford “d.school.”

so yeah i went there, did that, saw the qt jooish gurl who went to cornell and is 10 years younger than me and right now has a better job than i will ever have, as she pranced around the Disruptive Marketing Ideas Space with bare feet and chatted with handsome young middle class videographers about his exciting bike trip across nicaragua, el salvador, colombia, argentina, bolivia and his job in washington DC.

its funny i havent been around people like this since University, my university was FULL of people like this. and then they get JOBS at places like this.

its just a weird weird world maaaan, but they seem to like their jobs and not be derpressed and they are happy to use their intelligent minds to come up with Valuable Ideas and get paid good money to do it. Thinking and talking about important valuable thoughts. thought leaders. innovation fellows. being smart and getting paid good money for it, but not like STEM smart. well, maybe some of them can do SPSS and statistics, ie damned jooish lies hahahaha.

i was in a big fancy skyscraper downtown and saw that this big multinational corporation had lots of cute young gurls like this working there. Under 25 year old girls dressed like young professionals and talking about accounts. they all are business or marketing or HR or Organizational Students or similar degrees from at least somewhat decent schools who have all been Successfully Career Oriented since age 18. I wish I had that drive and work ethic. and its sad to see qt young women pouring their energy into these very high powered careers, rather than into selecting a good man and having children. young. they might marry another successful man who also works in the fancy building and have 1 kid at age 30 when they have been promoted twice or made two or three promotion-ish company moves.

I guess at that point the woman COULD probably opt to stay home and raise the kid because her husband will be wealthy. but you need a wealthy husband AND wealthy wife to live in the best neighborhoods hahaha. god forbid you have to live next to white proles who dont know what the fook youre talking about when you talk about positive disruption and ideas spaces and employee ENGAGEMENT. yeah its called, you stop being productive, youre FIRED. hows that for ENGAGEMENT. produce your quota or youre FIRED.

i talked to the department manager about getting on a mailing list and possibly doing more of the studies. this was the jooish cornell gurls BOSS, who was closer to my age or maybe even a few years older. she was also very very nice and very happy to talk to me. think she was white not jooish. I gave her muh phone number and email. I tried to bullshit a bit about how interesting this ideas space was, and about the stanford d.school. i stumbled near the end hahaha.

anyway thats how you make 400 dollars for less than 4 hours of fun, easy work, where people act all nice and interested in you, and ask for your rambling opinions, and cup and blow your balls rather than busting them hahahaha.  qt jooish research fellows from stanford cupping and blowing your balls hahahahahaha. yes moar pl0x.

she mentioned a book to me, creative or cooperative or collaborative something, and now i cant remember it.

really this is probably more EMPLOYEE ENGAGEMENT than MARKETING per se.

idea emergence. ok i think this is all for “executive development” and reshaping the Executive Culture at this big well known company.

intrapreneurs hahaha. google has a similar thing called google garage

http://www.fastcompany.com/3017509/work-smart/look-inside-google-garage-the-collaborative-workspace-that-thrives-on-crazy-creat

to get even more creative ideas out of their slacker loser employees hahahah. because they were holding back on some of their brainpower and creativity, being fookin ivy league grads who work at google. theyre just not smart or creative enough and need a push to get even more VALUE out of them.

i dunno you cant push people to be creative.

but then these same people say drop the mic things like “great ideas are worthless” basically meaning action is more important than thought, and you have to have “space to fail and make mistakes and learn from them” which i sort of agree with, because people shouldnt be afraid of being judged as STUPID or word, FIRED because they made a mistake. god forbid a human being make a mistake.

paradoxically, you need to be a top 1% winner in life to even GET A JOB (“career”) at a place that even gives lip service to these Hip Cool Innovative Creative Disruptive ideas. REAL companies cant AFFORD to have an Ideas Space and ride segways around and listen to Seth Godin Ted Talks every day. they’re too busy on the phone talking to clients. angry clients hahahha.

and alot of this Young Creative Talent is being brought in from ivy league joos to do fellowships in conjunction with hugeass corporations, to also stimulate startups and nonprofits and social justice things to “revitalize” the city. IMHO the ironic thing is, you can bring in the best and brightest joos with all this positive disruption and innovation, but how is that REALLY gonna affect the average prole? they have no chance of getting a job like these people have. they dont speak the language, they’re not so damn jooish hahahaha.

so big companies send their best and brightest. but 99% OF PEOPLE ARENT THE BEST AND THE BRIGHTEST. they just need average 28k entry level jobs. not fookin innovation creative fellowship jobs available only to ivy league fast track young joos.

Organizational Dynamics. well what about the front level customer service people making 13 bucks an hour, taking calls from people who feel screwed by your shitty product. well just chain them to their phone and fire them if they dont close cases by any means necessary quickly enough.

so thats what i want to know. what is this companys lowass level tier 1 phone customer service, what is THEIR office culture like. or do they outsource that to indians for a quarter a day.  beause they can get away with it.

creativity inc? is that the book?

how anyone can get good at charisma hahahahahah sign me up

FOUND IT. this is 100% the book. from stanford d.school founder. this company is all about stanford d.school.

kelley brothers, IDEO, “Creatives”, these people think EVERYONE is creative hahaha its all about how to encourage it, motivate it, practice it, develop it.

i used to be creative but not so much any more.

http://www.fastcodesign.com/3056415/ideo-silicon-valleys-most-influential-design-firm-sells-a-minority-stake

ok its all about “DESIGN”. design firms, design consultancies like IDEO, design school founded by the ideo brothers.

sooooo uhhhhh WTF is “DESIGN”? product design?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Design_thinking

jejejej

i dont give a shit about the executives being creative innovant HUMAN CENTERED etc bullshit UNLESS this trickles down to the very lowest levels. the fat bastards answering the phones. help them do their jobs better, help them help your customers better, and good god give them a break from god damn phones all the god damn time!!!!!

basically only rich young jooish stanford and cornell grads can afford such PRIVILEGE and LUXURY and Mental Masturbation and Bullshit! real working people dont have TIME for this bullshit, they are just trying to keep their jobs, and the only “Creativity” you have is how to bullshit and how to cut corners to make yourself appear more productive.  which is a fookin horrible kind of creativity i want nothing to do with.

of course this is not the kind of creativity which Design Firms talk about. they honestly have good intentions. im just saying Real Average Proles dont have the LUXURY of putting good intentions into practice and making a living from it. you gotta lie, bullshit, and cut corners, and im not surprised many people dont like it!

i still believe most people are born good and HAVE good intentions, but shit like their JOBS totally undermines this. turns them into dishonest bullshitting assholes. so sad. well thats capitalism for ya hahahahahahahaha.

heh the joos should be doing these jobs, they would be naturals at this kind of dishonesty. leave the honest jobs for honest people!

so yeah it was just a real interesting experience. and yeah the people were nice and it was fun giving my bullshit opinions with Elite Researchers and definitely some Stanford PHD’s in there. real fookin intellectuals hahaha. i dont get to do that too often. they had really nice snacks for us too. i mainly drank coffee (mixed with water hahaha) and the coffee tasted pretty good, not cheap folgers shit hahahaha. i kid, i normally drink folgers!

https://www.amazon.com/What-When-Your-Turn-Always/dp/1936719320/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1470361737&sr=8-7&keywords=seth+godin

they had 2 copies of this book sitting out on the table for us idiot participants to read. i thought it was kinda neat.

YES i am WELL aware that seth godin is a big name and a slimy, sleazy, conniving bullshit artist joo. i just never really read his stuff until there was a book sitting in front of me and I was waiting around for the people to call me for my turn. you know like reading a shitty magazine in a doctors office, but this book was actually kinda interesting.

i mean you really could become a better bullshitter, and I am sorta interested in that. as far as bullshitting companies to hire me and bullshitting women to want to hang out with me. NOT with bullshitting customers as to how It Is What It Is, We Cant Help You, We’re Done Here. i don’t like bullshitting to represent a bullshitting, dishonest company. bullshitting to try to sell myself is different. a lot more potentially rewarding cuz you might get a good job or a good tradwife hahaha.

so just to be clear, i dont hate seth godin, in fact right now i kinda like him and might eventually read sme of his books, and only after that might i truly hate him hahahaha.

i mean i do really need somebody to break me out of my rut and motivate me. a nice qt gf would be ideal, but thats just NOT gonna happen because gfs HATE guys who are stuck in ruts. they are NOT gonna help you out of rut. you need to do that yourself, with the help of other non-gf people like your family, friends, or jooish smooth talkers like godin hahahaha. and only then will the gf come. yes it sucks. yes i wish women were different, were designed differently, were inherently different. but they’re NOT. i wish they could see your potential and help you out of a run. but they DONT, they NEVER WILL, because theyre not BUILT that way. GOD didnt MAKE them that way. unfortunately.