setp 17 2016

reddit. i mean sometimes its ok but there are degenerates who think noods are fine, and being a slut is fine, and abortions are fine, very nihilistic and muh dick.

some of the advice is common sense and good, namely the stuff given by well adjusted, moral men, but like i say, theres this current of degeneracy that is just terrible. that says the being a promiscuous slut having casual secs is ok. that its ok to look at porn. that jealousy is always bad. that nobody has any responsibilities to anyone else. that kind of shitty consent morality type stuff. secular humanist garbage that really isnt that humanist at all!

or not judging someone who starts dating/fooking someone new 2 weeks after a breakup and just say “everybodys different.”

i mean they have no problem judging guys who are creepy or rapey or weird or controlling or abusive or manipulative or immature or whatever hahaha


oh deargod. white guy is thinking about leaving his white friends because they dont believe in institutional racism, and are narrow minded racists who think blacks have the same opportunities whites do. they dont believe in white privilege. therefore they are disgusting savages who must be dumped. this isnt even them going 1488 gtkrwn, moonman lynchin ingras, its “sorry, i just dont believe in white privilege bro.”

well no redpilled 1488ers here, but at least they said give these people a chance, dont dump them right away.

but yeah. so sad. white people dumping their white friends because the white friends do not kiss nonwhite ass and hate whites enough.

this all because much clearer to me once i understood the JQ. these powerful white men on top? theyre not white man. hahahaha. see the israel lobby and cultural marxism hehehehehe.

and also realize that many whites are simply pawns of the joos, like these whites spouting antiwhite antiracist crap. hand rubbing intensifies!!!!!!!! yes good goy hate your white privilege! give reparations to all those whites have disadvantaged!

ok. when i fell in luv with her, i wasnt really LOOKING. i wasnt really seriously thinking about going on okcupid and looking for damn sluts. i wasnt really thinking about meeting new women. and then one day i woke up and realize i had feelings for a woman i already knew.

well…not quite. it was a transition that took about a month. i forced myself to meditate and think about it. not avoid it. at first it felt wrong and weird. then day by day it felt less wrong and weird and day by day it felt more natural and right and good.

and now over the long term, the final analysis is that it was NOT wrong and weird, and it TOTALLY makes sense.

anyway. what else. i determined each job interview was like making a big 26000 dollar SALE. that is a pretty big deal eh? yes it damn well is. and not all of us are cut out to make big 26k sales. but we HAVE To be. because thats what getting a job is. youre selling yourself and the company is investing at least 26k in YOU.

yeah i just dont like when people think i had ulterior motives, when i didnt, but they wont let me defend myself. if youre gonna accuse me, at least let me defend myself. i expected the chance to defend myself from her.

yeah i am starting to get over it hahahah but i also dont want to really go on okcupid BUT i really SHOULD meet new women BUT i almost dont want to meet any women BUT dirty sluts because i am in a woman hating phase so i couldnt POSSIBLY appreciate even a GOOD woman!

yeah i made some mistakes but i think they were medium mistakes as opposed to huge mistakes. i guess the main thing to remember, if i ever make another female friend:

  1. tell her right away if i find her attractive or not, even if i am not super duper attracted to her, be like, yeah, TECHNICALLY, OBJECTIVELY, you are a 7/10, but i’m so fooked up i’m not attracted to anyone right now
  2.  but i could VERY POSSIBLY become attracted to you and fall in luv with you after TWO YEARS of solid friendship.
  3.  therefore, we need to revisit this topic every few months. feel free to ask me about it whenever, and i will make a point to check in every 2 or 3 months just to let you know.
  4.  also, here sign this jooish contract stating you will not get mad if i get feelings for you, and you will dump me Softly.

so yeah, i was a….coward bitchboi, but i still didnt deserve this. but also shes not an evil person and i can understand why she responded this way. the end. it just hurt me a LOT. and my feelings are valid hahahahahaha.

yeah it makes a lot more sense now. at least now if i ever become friends with a woman again, i can tell her,

“LISTEN. LOOK. HERES THE THING. I dont have any feelings for you RIGHT NOW, but that could DEFINITELY CHANGE. Because you are not a fat ugly old hambeast but a solid 7/10 hahahaha. just realize that if i start acting like i like you,a nd amd askig your to hang out with me all the time but you think im being weird and you blow me off, then yeah that’s your sign that I have started getting feelings for you.”

“I dont have any feelings for you right now, but you are young and not ugly, so, its not out of the question that I might be attracted to you if you were not in an LTR. If you break up with your Boifran then I have a 50% chance of trying to Date you. but im not gonna push you one way or the other because i dont encourage people to CHEAT, and if you wanted to Cheat with him on me, I would hatefook you and spit in your face and abandon you like the filthy cheater you are!”


well….what i would do is call their cuck BF, tell them the GF was a cheating bitch and you should dump this bitch right now, and THEN I would fook her, get vidya of it, and use the woman as a hatefook dumpster for about 10 fooks until i started feeling too degenerate about it.

no ideally i would say god damn you to hell you traitorous evil bitch and spit on her and walk away and NOT fook her.

guy is stonewalling a gurl. reddit says stonewalling is bad

so sad, he is 30 and has never kissed a gurl yet, so of course women get weirded out when he hasnt fooked them within a month and he is making a big deal out of this whole first kiss thing….



yeah its weird but he seems to be doing allright. no major issues, stable adult, not a ton of despair or shit.

sept 19

found this guy on linkedin i used to work with at the horrible job. he was a “newer” guy but he was really sharp and smart and picked it up really fast. charming, smart white man. he did degen things like go to electronic music festivals and take ecstasy and acid there and probably bang sluts. i immediately thought he would be charming enough to bang That Woman. i dont think he did, and of course that was just my insecurity. bottom line is, he was a smart and very capable guy worthy of a more than 15 an hour job.

i randomly see his linkedin and see that he worked as a temp contract for this one company that ive been meaning to apply for the job, and he describes it as basic data entry (awesome) where he was a top performer and instructed by management to help train people to do their job better. there was a possibility to make it a temp to perm, BUT he got passed up because he had only been there 3 months. and i believe it was the perm job I saw on indeed and wanted to apply for.

why didnt he apply for the perm job? Im sure he did, and thats when they told him, sorry, you havent been here long enough, even though youre the top performer.

ok. so that means they never planned to hire externally. which is good. why not promote someone. or in this case, temp to perm.  and i am a fan of promoting from within. and yes seniority does mean something to me.

but i wish they wuld have found a way to keep him on because he is very capable and deserves a bigboy job. his big career objective is just to become a damn tier 2 already because he is sick of being tier 1 support. answering stupid calls in a call center. 1 year at our place, 4 years at goddamn COMCAST, he should be made a SAINT for that. GOD DAMN. all he wants to do is get off tier 1 phones. and he is more than deserving.  but noooooooo.  thats too much for a smart white boy to ask. also he has very good people skills.

now i didnt trust him because i saw him as direct competition for That Woman, and also I think he is a Recovering Autist who probably made a conscious effort to become so Charming, and i am jealous of people who have actually succeeded in that struggle, where i have failed hahaha.

i have been looking for some fresh funeral doom metal and esoteric might be good. i have heard about them for 20 years (well, maybe 15 hahahaha) but never actually listened to them.

anyway. that guy deserves a decent job off the phones but i hate how women can Spread So Easy for someone with just a little bit of charm. well, he was kinda handsome too. there should be a law hahahaha. dont spread for a man until you have known him a YEAR. they say the Mask Slips after a year hehehehe.

heh my mask didnt slip. i didnt have ulterior motives. i just got a new mask hahahaha. no i was never wearing a mask with her. my FACE changed. damn. and she can go spread her coont for charming handsome men from tinder. i bet this guy is on tinder hahahaha.

but damn 4 years answering phones at comcast, he’s entitled to anything he wants after that living hell.

but yeah should give this one a fair chance too, of course im familiar with the name for the past 10 years or more hahaha.

yeah i just hate not knowing what to do, and the people who do know are too busy to really help you, and push you to figure it out, which all wouldnt be so bad if you had some actual time and didnt have the person waiting on hold for you to explain the shit to them!

contacted to do a written test for part time city job which pays 15 an hour and i would LOVE to get.

so stupid though. there is only one chance to take the test. they get like 20-30 people in a room to take the test all at once. people have lives and families. you can schedule an interview, why cant you schedule the test. it REALLY smacks of making people jump through obviously pointless hoops. i hope they are not promising somebody else this job and REALLY making us al jump through hoops even more than i am thinking!

thing is, i already went through TWO testing sessions with city HR for another very very very similar job. a 4 hour written test session with 2 tests that were very similar. another 2 hour session on word and excel. 2 or 3 interviews, i cant even remember. and still nothing.

why cant they use my “scores” from those previous tests and just call me in for a fookin INTERVIEW?

when in the end, even if i get an interview, theyll be like, oh yeah dont pick him, he’s got a long gap.

but i am damn sure counting this as .5 of an interview to add to my count there!

the only thing that could make this stupider is if they are interviewing for an ELIGIBILITY LIST for Possible Jobs in the Future. I recall there was an actual goddamn posting.

but what did the posting say…….

oh fuggggg. it does say that. it is for a goddamn eligibility list. that lasts for 2 years. well at least its 2 years and not 6 months hahahahaha.

maybe GOD is calling me to be permanently unemployed just as he is calling me to never have a white waifu and white children.

maybe GOD is calling me to have a nonwhite waifu and nonwhite children!!!!!

because we know GOD WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS!!!!!!!!

that would be SO BAD though. Why cant GOD respect the white race? there are other God Worshippers who are able to be pro-white! AYO HOL UP! R U TELLIN ME GOD isn’t actually pro-white?

that would suck!


heheheh his family and friends still like his ex gf AND the other man and dont care that she cheated on him with the other man. i hope reddit doesnt tell him to “just get over it you controlling jealous abuser” because this literally is stupid and offensive hahaha.

thankfully reddit agreed, yes this bitch is evil, give your family an ultimatum and tell them to stop being friends with her.

you never know with reddit.

this funeral doom sounds bretty good

just got into the mood for some slow funeral doom, no excuses no apologies. but i want it to be kinda pure. like no black metal in there. not ruling out the desire for funeral doom with a touch of black metal. see: abyssmal sorrow? something like that. warning: might have drum machine, i HATE drum machines in metal. also this band lycus. def no drum machine there.

i mean it might be time to break out the EVOKEN hahahaha.

i remember when i was in high school first finding out about black metal and doom metal, EVOKEN were a new and exciting band, and i was on board with them before “quietus” came out, IE 15 years + ago hahahaha. then i lost track of them.

music schmusic who cares really. i wonder what these guys do for work hahahaha. probably make 70k a year in skilled trades hahahaha and have 3 kids apiece, nice white wives. WELL GOOD FOR THEM.

then they shouldnt abandon their families to be in a metal band, EVEN IF they are in one of the Best Current Funeral Doom Metal Bands.  not even Good Music is worth abandoning families over.

but they only do 1 album every 4 years. maybe they dont abandon their families.

well, i hope not.

heh. once i wrote a review of either “quietus” or “embrace the emptiness”, one of my tryhard 10,000 word reviews, and the band liked it and put it on their website. that was pretty neat. this was no later than 2001 hahaha.

so evoken if you are reading this, NEVER ABANDON YOUR FAMILIES. TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR CHILDREN. BE GREAT FATHERS TO THEM. retire from the band if it ever becomes an either or thing.  your childrens well being is worth more than any DOOM METAL.

says a guy who likes doom metal and has been an evoken fan for 17 years hahahahahahaha. i get it. if anyone gets it, i do, hahahaha. i love black metal and some doom metal hehehehe.

but you know what i luv more than black metal and doom metal?


So yeah I really dont WANT God to call me to be single & childless OR have a nonwhite waifu OR nonwhite children.

i took a 50% dose of nyquil hhehehehe

got 3 job applications in today and 6.8 miles of powerwalking. netcalories of 1044 with goal of 1200. so ok i guess it was good day right. welp would have liked to do more job apps or gotten more calories off. but when you want to do BOTH, i guess its not too bad. really the more important thing is job. i should stop trying to lose weight. but would easing up on that REALLY improve my job search THAT much? i dunno.




for sat april 15

now: sept 6 2016

sept 7 2016


yeah i have been physically not too great, mentally/emo not too great either since coming back from muh “vacation.” hehehehe. when I got back I promptly went to bed for 16 hours. the next day I was still tired and had aches and pains all over the body. i had done some lifting and carrying of stuff but it really didnt seem bad enough to produce such soreness!

also had annoying borderline water faucet colon which i usually only get in the morning after drinking a lot of coffee too fast, but here it lasted all day and that was very annoying. couldnt even enjoy a nice powerwalk without thinking im gonna shart muh pants.

have been getting sharper “carpal tunnel” pains lately. this has been going on for at least a year but the last couple days its been more noticeable. it is honestly probably enough to get me a medical MJ recommendation for “chronic pain”!!!!! not even joking.

was taking pepto bismol which usually helps with the watery #2’s, but didnt seem to help much yesterday. at the end of the day was very tired. not just low energy, but darn exhausted, even though i hadn’t done anything. slept pretty well again but could have slept longer if i hadnt forced self.

yassss got new shoes from zappos, they seem to fit well. i mean my current shoes are just terrible. they are SO worn down, but really all on one side, so the shoes are very lopsided and diagonal and that cant be good for the foot.  i mean i should have upgraded these shoes months ago. i hope i havent done permanent damage hahahaha. basically i am an overpronator and the outside of the shoe gets worn down much much much more.

but yeah i just felt like i was 80 years old hahahaha.

THANK GOD for the new shoes though. this is my typical thing though. wait way too long to replace stuff that should be replaced. or get haircut. or clothes.

honestly cant stop pooping. this is ridiculous.

new shoes feel gr8! that is awesome. very good. THANK GOD. because this is a privilege most people dont have. buying new shoes when they need them.

yeah so i wore the shoes and took a 3.2 mile walk and the shoes were great.

388 days since i sent her the last contact. i figure 400 days is a nice round number. nicer than 365. but a YEAR is a nice round period of time. why arent years 400 days hahahaha.

422 days since i last talked to her, abotu 419 days since i last SAW her.

theres a thought that I should address Muh Egregious Red Flag Employment Gap in muh cover letter. I am open to doing this.





ok. gave this one a try because i liked the cover art hahahaha. wanted to see how the production and songwriting compares to “ashes against the grain.” there seems to be more blasting in a blatant black metal style on Marrow of the spirit, so, I like that. now the SOUND on MOTS is really interesting. I think I like it, it’s definitely provocative so yeah that’s good. the drums sound a little weird and the guitars sound very “warm” and fuzzy. the whole thing sounds rawer and more underproduced than I was expecting, not in a bad way of course.

it sounds like they intentionally tried to make their sound more “raw” or “live” or “organic”, and in theory, I am always in support of this.

heh. finally applied for job. 30k county job. i prefer to apply for the 26k county jobs, but i have gotten interviewed for a 42k county job!

i want to work for you because you have a MF day shift, weekends off, no overtime, 37.5 hour work week, and bennies. so its a good fit for me because i dont handle stress or pressure well hahahahahaha. or customers. thats why i have to be high on xanax all day at work hahahahahaha.

no obviously i don’t actually often USE benzos. i brought 3 valiums with me to our little vacation, and i completely FORGOT about them. sheeeeit. they may have come in handy when i was freaking out because of the MJ! which is the entire reason I brought the valium!!!!!

i am very close to the cusp of focusing hardcore on temp/staffing agencies. recruiters for temp jobs.

because the only people that will “take a chance” on such a RISKY person as me, are the absolutely bottom of the barrel shittiest jobs that will hire ANYONE……or MAYBE jobs where the job contract is limited. temporary. finite. temp. if the person sucks, they will be gone soon.

also if i go a week without an interview, the confidence def goes down. as you get 2 or 3 rejection emails a day hahahaha.

heh. if i got rejected by WOMEN like this, I would have even less confidence hahahaha.

or maybe i just wouldnt care and would bullshit the things i am supposed to bullshit to get women to spread for muh dick hahahahahaha. maybe it would actually be EASIER.

yeah that sounds woman hating, but You Women really DO give it up to easily and don’t have the appropriate RESPECT for SECS, like your biological role in secs. I dont NEED to have as much respect for secs, because men just dump sperm. the costs and risks and responsibilities are much higher for women. RESPECT that.

ok forced my way thru 2 applications. again i am getting discouraged here so i am not applying to “reach” stuff with muh dream orgs unless they are fairly low paying…..and of course these jobs skew towards high paying.

unbelievable. company sending a pdf for me to complete…..but its not an editable pdf. they literally want me to print it out, fill it out by hand, then scan it, then send THAT pdf back. this is a fairly big company where that shit is blatantly embarrassing.

so instead I am converting the pdf to a jpg and trying to edit it in paint. not working so well. with the text boxes and shit.

this is truly a very good album!

it took me basically the whole album just to fill out that shit. using pixlr to add text boxes, rasterize, and draw little circles. unbelievable. they are looking for skills in VISIO and PROJECT which i technically have hahaha yet their goddam Talent Acquisition Team can’t make a pdf editable. absolutely disgraceful. See, I would volunteer my personal time after work to make the pdf editable so they wouldnt have to pay me for that work.

plus i get to show extreme ingenuity and cleverness and problem solving with this pdf to jpg, pixlr, jpg to pdf nonsense, hahahaha. sending them back a pdf that was 8 times larger in size than the one they sent me hahahaha.

because they couldnt do any of this with plain text, saying, answer all of these questions in your reply email. nooooooo that would be too easy.

or god forbid have something in the taleo applicant tracking system THEY ALREADY HAVE AND USE.

but yeah. then they wanted me to explain in the REPLY EMAIL any Gaps in the past 7 years, and also all Reasons For Separation in the past 7 years. I guess I should be glad they didnt ask for 20 years!

but this implies they are gonna read the email……so why demand the shitty, shitty pdf as well?

just to make shit more difficult and weed out the weak.

so I will be PISSED if this doesnt result in an interview.

i added an extra 20 minutes to the spreadsheet for the amount of time it took to apply for this job.

thinking SEARS might be a better place than jcpenneys for me hahahaha.

just looking for t-shirts that have like STRIPES or patterns or some shit, that is not a damn “graphic tee.”

something that is more interesting than just a solid color t shirt, which is what i usually wear, but that is kinda boring!

interesting. what gets me most worked about That Woman is not really thoughts of her spending time and being nice to other men, and loving them and cuddling with them, but really the more x rated stuff, like her sucking dick, fooking her, her sitting on their face and them licking her asshole, hahahahahahahaha. banging her from behind, banging her from the front, tongue in the mouth, her sighing and breathing heavy and getting juice all over. that real porno stuff, which isnt even all porno stuff, but actual real life secs stuff. that is what gets me angery.

that is the sort of stuff that gets me all hot and bothered!

anyway of course i should not be thinking about it at all.

but yeah i have no interest in other women. occasionally i will see a young qt i want to bang but not super often. and i would STILL want to bang HER moar!!!!!!

stupid shit really.

basically i cant ever imagine WANTING another woman as much as her, and also that i will never STOP wanting her!

i mean yeah it has gotten better. and yeah i DID eventually stop wanting those other women. it just took like 2 years hahahaha. and it hasnt been 2 years with this woman yet.

just no interest in women other than to maybe opportunistically bang unmarriageable sluts. great. and never fully exorcise the memory of HER. because I always got along with HER best, we had the most special best connection.

yeah well if it was so good, how come she couldnt even send me a damn text message and just say awwwww im sorry ok now im blocking you sorry.

or have her family or our mutual friend send that message to me for her.

but yeah that connection! even if it was just for me. how am I ever gonna feel that way about someone else ever again? and that is what I WANT to feel for muh wife, the mother of muh children!

yeah it def was the worst heartbreak.

the OBVIOUS ANSWER to how do i forget about HER is……….MEET NEW WOMEN!!!!!!!!!! THE TIME HAS COME where I NEED to MEET NEW WOMEN!!!!!!!!

of coursh I have never ever really liked meeting new people. it is not fun. men or women.

some people, normies and chads, actually LIKE meeting new people and think its FUN.

i have no interest in meeting people unless its a young woman and they are qt and seem NICE.

how hard is it to be nice? not very, but many people seem to think so.

hearing about this guys GF who is like 19 years old and NOBODY likes her. she has “no personality”.

i thought, so what if she has “no personality,” That Woman didn’t have much of a personality, usually if a woman has a strong personality, that means she’s bitchy and obnoxious. no thank you. just have a not-strong personality and be nice. be pleasant. i’m thinking this young girl is both no personality AND not really nice or pleasant either. jeeeez. how unpleasant do you have to be as a 19 year old gurl to have nobody like you??!?!?!?! also I have heard she is not terribly good looking either.

meanwhile i found, once upon a time, a nice, qt, woman that everybody liked because she was NICE and had a GOOD personality.

with men its harder. you have to have an ACTUAL personality, and NOT Just Be Nice. i guess I cant be mad about that, thats just nature.

dramatic breakup story, he cant get over ex, who blocked him, but they had their problems, also she talked to him a lot more and prob would have been willing to give him some closure

spet 9

well i have learned from /r/relships/ that women indeed have some agency and are not to be regarded as total BABIES.

(every single attractive young woman on linkedin is a GOD DAMN RECRUITER.)

anyway, not to get off on a tangent, basically, the leftist scum of reddit insists that women are not powerless infants and indeed they DO have some responsibilities. well of COURSE they would think that tho! they like powerful independent wimmin!

but yeah you hear stories where women actually do stuff, put in an effort, or in some cases, stalk the guy, or get needy or clingy, texting the guy, getting jealous, getting heartbroken. i guess its nice to know that women are CAPABLE of this!

or just basically that they are willing to talk to you when they are dumping you and to say sorry and to be conscious that them dumping you is gonna hurt you and they are making some token effort to mitigate some of that hurt!

also the idea that the solution is pretty obvious (dump that b and run away!!!!) and the Bad Guy is pretty obvious.

i just hate being the Bad Guy because I couldnt understand Space.

but i dont think it was that simple either. i think any mature person would say SPACE ISNT AN EXCUSE TO AVOID DEALING WITH THE SITUATION. SPACE ISNT AN EXCUSE TO NEVER COMMUNICATE.

i think i already made that a post title. or something very close to it hahahaha.

so basically when a woman has secs quickly, she is saying “MY VALUES ARE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT THAN YOURS.”  so maybe its a stage. but why should the stage be like 10 years long or 15 years or whatever? thats a pretty long stage. too long for me.

ok applied for us army job. they have a big facility which employs a lot of people in the area with damn good 35k jobs like this one.

an open relationship will NEVER work if BOTH people dont agree about wanting it. period. it HAS to be completely mutual and UNANIMOUS.

of course at least 80% of Breakups are not unanimous, but they dont need to be. it would be nice if they were!


welp at 399 jobs now, should prob make the big 400th a good one. i think we decided not too long ago to make 500 the new goal.

i mean i have a hard time with jobs. bullshitting my way and figuring out what to do in tough confusing situations. figuring out how to do and handle my job. figuring out how to fix problems and what to say to frustrated customers who are counting on me to fix their problem…….and i really dont know what im doing. i feel incompetent because I AM incompetent and its inherently stressful to try to serve people when you ARE incompetent. because you ABSOLUTELY do not feel free to make mistakes or fail, because someone is basically gonna insult your intelligence.

in school it was ok to make mistakes, because only your grade suffered, and only a little bit, and you could always ask questions without being bitched at and treated like someone who should be fired.

how did that woman do it? oh yeah she just went with the flow. great advice, you horrible person hahahahahaha.

fookin captain obvious. fookin captain obviously easier said than done. jeeeeeez.

also reading /r/rels you see how FLAKY women are. they will just give up on you for the stupidest shittiest reasons and there is nothing you can do about it. because you have to respect their wishes that they dont care about you any more and dont want to do anything to work on things.

where do you go for nondegenerate dating advice? actually /r/rels is pretty good…..BUT they are degen on things like open rels, or being a SLUT. i guess I am just happy that they view Cheating as a Bad Thing. but yeah they dont view having a Super Promiscuous Slut Past as being a bad thing. when it totally is.

and i dont want to go to a christian thing, again. because I want YOU to understand why being a slut is wrong, not just because of muh good book or muh jeebus. which are all great things mind you, but it honestly seems………MORALLY LAZY!!!!!! to have muh jeebus be your answer to all moral questions.

but i dont like atheists. but do i like a devout blind faith type person better than an atheist? probably.

ideal would be a person like me: someone who wants to have faith but is just filled with tons of doubt.

and a woman who just thinks casual sex is GROSS or SLUTTY, and SLUTTY is BAD. I dont wanna be an icky gross SLUT. SLUTS ARE GROSS, she says. I would never want to be gross like that.

and she said that! she had an appropriate sense of DISGUST and DISDAIN 4 SLUTS!!!!

if i even have to mansplain it…….that stuffing a guys dick in your mouf and babymaker, who you dont even know this guy, you just met him a few days ago…if i have to mansplain why that is disgusting, then you are too far gone.

and 90% of women are too far gone hahahahahaha.

might have a little nyquil today, go for walk after, go to bed early.

called this auto service place for recall notice and actually got scheduled to get that fixed. so that was an accomplishment hahaha.

heh. you know how some people “break up” but theyre not really “borken up” because they are still hanging out, fooking, texting hahahaha. sometimes even the gurl initiates, decides she doesnt want to be totally done with the guy, and presents herself to be fooked. can’t say that happened to me hahahaha.

basically, if she had ANY desire to talk to me……..SHE WOULD HAVE.


but its easy to think they aren’t, when you have a case where the woman does ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. you think, are ALL women like that? I HOPE not all women are like that!!!!!!!! but i dont know enough women to tell. so then its GOOD to read these stories and anecdotes.

AYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I have just gone from a floundering seal to a baby seal on SwC poker hahahahaha. this is a YUGE deal, its taken me like 2 years to get to this point.





feb 1

wow. i really gotta get out this rut. this is no way to live. this is not healthy! i would not recommend this. time to get a new shitty job, go crazy, and quit in a Huff, mving myself even further down the career ladder. i dont move up the ladder with time, i move down it hahahaha.

i grew up having a very negative opinion of women. in short, they were mostly bitchy, dumb, slutty, disgusting, stupid, mean, obnoxious, annoying, awful, scheming, hypocritical, immoral, sneaky, lying, cheating, evil. you couldnt possibly like or respect these pigs. they literally had no redeeming qualities except for the secs they sluttily gave away to every man except YOU hahaha.

probably because most of my friends had bad experiences with women and werent big fans of them either! and that rubbed off on me.

also women seemed intimidating because i didnt know how to talk to them, how to deal with them, and i didnt like how they all had secs with guys so QUICKLY. that seemed like a big deal to me, and i thought shit if youre the one who can get pregnant here, you prob wouldnt have a problem with waiting amirite?

i had muh first crush on a girl in 7th and 8th grade when i was 13/14. that was a bad choice because she was a mudshark slut. yes you could be a mudshark slut at age 14. how disgraceful! but she was a Bad Gurl who liked very Bad Bois. the badder the better. i have no idea why i liked her. prob because she was real purty. i felt that it was disappointing that she was such a bad gurl. i kinda wanted to save her and turn her into a nice gurl hahaha.

then i went into my women hating phase until like age 20/21, when is the second time i develop actual feelings for a woman. and they were very very very strong, and disrupted muh whole life. i didnt know how to deal with them!

in the interim i made out with 1 gurl when i was about 15 and i had VERY mixed feelings about it. i kinda felt pressured into it, that she wanted to do it more than i did, but i just went along to Gain The Experience, but i wasnt particularly HAPPY about it. i was kinda ANGRY about it for a couple years! also she lived like 50 miles away. maybe if she lived nearby i could get to know her as a person.

by age 20/21 i was completely off the track and should have took a hiatus from college at age 20, started intensive shit with a shrink and meds, gone teetotal from alcohol and MJ, stayed at home, got a shitty job, and finished up college at close to home U, pref in STEM hahahahahaha.  but nooooooooooooo i soldiered thru my useless degree and continued all my bad horrible habits.

i became sort of friendly with some women at age 20, but it was not until age 21 that i made my first decent actual official female friend. that was a positive move. also at that age i first pseudodated a gurl. and we rushed through all the beginning stages of a “rel” in a very short time, leaving me confused and sad and angry and disappointed and crazy hahahaha.

i made some more female friends at age 22.

anyway not sure what my point was. probably that its pointless and a bad idea to hate women unless you actually have some female friends.

even as women were dumping me and disappointing me and i should have really Hated All Women, i didnt really, having female friends was really useful in keeping me from hating all women.

you see, i didnt really LIKE hating all women! i didnt WANT to hate all women! it was GOOD for me to have female friends.

now, there was a little bit of drama…..but that was because i had fallen in LUV with a friend of my female friend. so i completely lost muh mind. the regular DRINKING did not help at this point. i should have just stopped drinking and been like ayyyyy baby wan sum hang out lmao and gotten rejected that way, instead of drunkenly pining for her.

MY POINT is, its not fun or good or healthy to Hate Women, and its a lot easier to not hate women when you actually have some Woman Friends. in fact, this will go farther in curing your womanhate, than actually dating or getting feelings for a gurl . cuz that shit always ends badly. with my female friends, well the ones i didnt fall in luv with, it never ended BADLY. we just drifted away as friends often do. but no hard feelings.

and it sucks to think of somebody you were in luv with, you wanted to be with forever, now they are giving dat secs up really easily and quickly to other guys, and that makes you sad, angry, and disgusted. because its none of your business. but i say you are still entitled to your opinion that she should not be a disgusting whore!!!!! and entitled to be hurt when she is. even if shes done with you. becuase you are not quite done with her. you are still in luv with her, still want her. who knows when that is gonna be over.

2% milk has 120 calories per cup, whole milk 150.

yeah i have reading reddit relships all day to convince myself that i did nothing wrong and that she is out of line.

well i admit i was cowardly and weak. but that it wasnt THAT bad. i mean its hard to have a hard discussion. give me a damn break. i wasnt trying to AVOID it. i was trying to confront it, in my weak way. i was hinting an signally heavily, and trying to hang out. she was tyring to avoid everything.

i dunno i dont like to be treated so disrespectfully. its very disrespectful to be Thrown Away Like Garbage!!!! can you understand that?!?!?!?!?!

its not so bad if its a random stranger. then you can just say fookin asshole and never see them again. but when they were once your friend, a good friend, and they do this……its LIKE a betrayal hahahahahah.

plus her throwing me away like garbage is WAY more disrespectful than me getting feelings for her.

i didnt think she had such little respect for me! so that was shocking! shit she used to have a lot of respect for me.

i have never lost this much respect for a person! i dont even know how to relate to that! well except when women dump me and go be huge sluts hahaha.

hmm i almost wrote a response to this guy but he deleted his story and i cant find a cache/archive of it hahahaha.

nothing TOO exciting, i just sorta related to him. young man and his gf dumped him. not in the worst way, but not in the best way either. i wanted to use it as an example of, yeah this isnt the worst dumping, but women should aim to dump a lot better than this.

how are they so stupid and UnEmpathic that they dont know or dont care that they will be causing a person Great Pain?

how are relships such ugly, disappointing, tragic, heartbreaking, insane, Wrong, Clusterfooks??!?!?!?!?!?! cant people get along better than this? just use a LITTLE common sense. i would treat a person way better than this.

therefore, it is WOMEN who are at fault for all the Sorrow and Badness in Bad Relships hahahahaha.

FOUND IT! he crossposted it in relship advice as well. and i archived it for all eternity hahahaha

what i would say to him: yeah she COULD HAVE shown you even LESS respect by cheating on you….but she SHOULD have shown you a HELL of a lot MORE respect tho, by taking into account your feelings about being dumped, and being nice but decisive in dumping you.

IMHO, when you agree to a rel with them, you OWE IT TO THEM, its part of your RESPONSIBILITIES to them, to dump them gently and kindly and compassionate, if it reaches the point where you want to dump them and they want to stay/work on the rel….and you want to get out.  its like an early termination fee. the “fee” is simply BE NICE. BE KIND. BE GENTLE.

i would NEVER treat somebody like this unless i HATED them. i would never HATE them unless they made a concerted effort to push my buttons. i wouldnt hate somebody for getting feelings for me. i know you just cant turn feelings on an off at will, for any random person.

i hated one guy because he trolled me on our views of the world and became the most annoying faggot you wanted to punch in the face repeatedly.

i think thats how i made her feel hahahaha.

to her i became a really annoying faggot she wanted to punch in the face repeatedly.


punchable faces hahahaha.

that might be the best word for how she felt about me. the reaction i got out of her.

but i really feel if she took 5 minutes to think about it like an adult, she would see how ridiculous that is. why couldnt she give me that courtesy after the years together? are all women this childish and stupid and obtuse and unkind?

its totally immature, like something a 14 year old would do.

and in some ways i am very very emotionally mature, like a 14 year old: i get feelings too fast and too strong, i get feelings if i have secs or make out with or even cuddle with a gurl, and get way too attached to them too fast.

but i think this is a more positive way to be emotionally immature, than in the bad way, were you are paranoid and throwing tantrums and hate people for shitty reasons, and cant even attempt empathy, and are all hot and cold with no in between.

i mean she has empathy too, ive seen her use empathy, shes empathzed with ME before! just in this SITUATION to have her get so bipolar, was weird as hell, and caught me COMPLETELY off guard.

some woman on TRS forum said to be attractive to women, you have to TAKE REJECTION WELL. I thought this was stupid because a. nobody takes rejection super well b. if a woman rejects you and sees that you arent really upset….then what? is she gonna revoke her rejection? probably not. and if she did, that would be stupid and shameful and not the type of woman you want to be with.

so in other words, when That Woman rejected me, she probably hated and disrespected me EVEN MORE when she saw how upset and devastated and hurt I was.

i dunno this makes women seem like SADISTS, just shoveling hate and misery and suffering on men.

it did not seem worth it to autistically argue this one point with the forum woman hahahaha

well i took THE PREVIOUS REJECTION PRETTY WELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


why WOULD you reject someone in the meanest way possible?  because you HATE them?

why wouldnt you TRY to be nice or sympathetic when you are rejecting someone?

why would she not even take 5 minutes to THINK ABOUT THIS and how what i did was not some evil horrible thing???????

what the hell did her friends and family say when she talked about it with her? surely they cant all be as fooked up as her! unless she lied to them and said “UGH hes been creeping and stalking on me for months. he KNOWS im not interested but he still doesnt TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER!” and then they say “well dump that creeper to the curb gurlfran, you dont owe him an apology lmao”

cuz she seemed pretty reasonable and thoughtful, and her family did too, such that if she were making a horrendous Lapse In Judgment, they would steer her the right way. and i believe this was a Horrendous Lapse In Judgment on her part.

yeah yeah yeah a tale as old as time, but im not used to it happening to me, from a person i really didnt expect it from.  it shattered my confidence and made me think, hmmm maybe i really DID do something awful to warrant this. i dont realize it but i still stabbed her right in the back and she is just showing righteous anger now. i am reaping what i sowed, even though i didnt realize i sowed it.

so yeah its a long process trying to convince myself that i am not reaping what i sowed, that this was a YUGE lapse in judgment on her part.

but what DID she say to her family and friends? that i was just being a CREEPER WEIRDO and not taking NO for an answer? how much would they have pushed back on that? I”LL NEVER KNOW. Like they could ask her, well did you TALK to him about this? did you tell him you dont want to hang out, or do you keep telling him later, later, later? do you think maybe he likes you? dont HATE him for THAT. hes not a bad guy!! try not to break his heart when you dump him, he’s not trying to hurt you. hey maybe even give him a try, he would treat you really well, you could do a lot worse, you already know each other and get along. you knew this guy for almost 3 years and used to be good friends. dont just throw him away like a piece of garbage, he’ll be devastated, and thats just bad karma, not a cool thing to do to anybody. think about it. if he had any choice in this, why would he pick a time when its bad timing? did he write you any emails? oh a couple long super long emails? did you read them or just delete them? this isnt some random weirdo. remember not too long ago you were telling me what a good person he was. so treat him like that.

ok fatclub. hopefully TRUMPENFUHRER wins iowa caucus. is there one winner for each party?

whos worse, bernie or hillary? probably hillary hahahahahahahaha. bernie admits he is a j00ish socialist hahahaha.

AND if she told me WHY she couldnt just talk to me….oh because i BETRAYED her. i would STILL want to talk about THAT.

well i dont agree i betrayed you.

well i think you did.

and you think I will be able to convince her i didnt betray her? I, as the accused betrayer?  I would need a damn independent tribunal. 3rd parties. which i why i wanted her to talk to her friends and family. shit i should have Reached Out to her friends and family at the time. i thought about contacting her mother. i met the mother a few times and she seemed to like me, and i guess the woman used to tell her mother all sorts of good things about me. if i were personally closer with the mother, i probably would have contacted her!!!!

but i just wonder what The Woman told her mother, and what the mother said. I will NEVER KNOW.

its really hard to say!

maybe there was no talk at all. or it was like, yeah, were not getting along so well right now, we are drifting apart, not as close anymore, oh well that happens, thats life.

i just hate thinking this will happen again: that i will accidentally do something HORRIBLY WRONG an drive the woman of muh dreams away from me;

and also worried i will never feel that way about a woman again. i am getting OLD, and i dont like older women, and i dont like casual sex women on the websites.

heh. i thought I WONDER IF SHE IS ON TINDER then i saw you couldnt browse tinder without a smart phone.

i actually went to tinder with the intent of looking for HER. confirming that she is putting herself out there for casual sex.

anyway i hate making mistakes, HUGE mistakes, without even being aware that i am.

and if this is the LAST woman….damn.

i wish she hadnt made me feel like i royally screwed up.

but no one can make you feel someway without your permission.

but…..when they treat you like you did something horribly wrong….they are kinda making you feel you did something horribly wrong. and in at least 50%, they would probably be RIGHT!

essentially i am being falsely accused hahahaha. i dont know how this feels. it is so confusing and disorienting.

cuz sometimes….its RIGHT for you to feel bad, its not a matter of you “giving permission to let someone else make you feel bad.” its because you really did something bad to them, they are upset at you, they should be, and you feel bad.

and you SHOULD listen to the people who you care about and who you thought cared abotu you. because their perceptions of you matter.

so when someone who mattered to me a lot thought i was a awful piece of shit…….i was hurt, and i felt horrible for hurting them.

heh. they should have KNOWN that i would take this hard. they should have thought hmmm he will prob be hurt by this, probably should tread lightly. not be EXTRA HARSH.

well really extra harsh would be her TELLING ME all sorts of shitty things like “i hate you, you did this to yourself, you made me do this, youre horrible person,etc” while dumping me. really she was just too afraid of confrontation.

she might ahve WANTED to be nicer to me, she was just too SCARED to.


and because i was obsessed about handling the rejection like a man….i did not contact her 90000000000000000 times afterwards. i contacted her like 4 times. i begged a little bit but not too much. i didnt bombard her with so much shit, to FORCE her to say “stop harrassing me, i am blocking you, if you stalk me im getting a restraining order” etc. she just blocked me on FB and she may have blocked me on phone and email, no way to confirm that.

just watching iowa caucus instead of going to fatclub. i came in under muh calorie goal anyway so thats good. on muh BEEF DIET hahahaha. best shit ever.

but yeah so disappointing. she could have just sent a message and said this will be the last message, im blocking you after this, but SORRY SORRY SORRY, i didnt mean to hurt you. and that would have saved a decent amount of pain.

ITS REALLY NOT THAT HARD. it seems like it would be HARDER to do what shes actually doing. i mean the guilt would eat me alive.

but she is good at avoiding confrontation. yeah i keep forgetting she does have a red flag that she is able to just throw away her responsibilities and run away in shameful ways. its sad cuz she can do better. but stupid when you are on the receiving end of that.

i say she has nothign but yellow flags but this one might be a red. not going to go into detail here hahaha.


gotta when you get up in the morning say: i definitely did not deserve this. i did not do something horribly wrong. they have made an EGREGIOUS error in judgment. they got me wrong, and they did me wrong. it was a horrible misunderstanding that will NEVER be resolved.

just dont like poeple being WRONG about me.

also i dont know if she felt betrayed by me, or she just wanted to GET RID of me. maybe she does feel bad. she is not a horrible person, but when she is forced to make a difficult choice, she has a tendency to break down and NOT do the right thing. a good person who makes horrible, regrettable choices. it really is kinda tragic but i cant save her from herself. unless she lets me. which she wont. hahahaha. ok have fun either having mud bastards, or becoming a crazy old catlady. and if you have a kid you will prob not be good mother hahahaha.

she has the potential to be a good mother, but also the potential to be a bad mother. its hard to tell. she might decide its too HARD to be a good mother and then just neglect her children and emotionally abandon them. is that the kind of woman i want to be married to, having my children? FOOK NO!!!!!

its similar to a woman having an ABORTION. its a convenient, expedient, super effective, but very morally ambiguous (and i would say, very immoral!!) “Solution” to a “problem”.  and probably the woman doesnt feel HAPPY about it, might even feel long term guilt or conflict about it, and they arent angry or hateful or feel BETRAYED by the baby theyre killing.

but yeah if you can just GET RID OF a PERSON, its kinda like KILLING them! except here, you’re still alive!

its weird being metaphorically KILLED by somebody important to you! it sends the message that your LIFE isnt very important to them. at least not more important than their feelings of discomfort.

she has the capacity to do the right thing and be a good person…..but when it comes time to make some real important decisions…..she CHOKES and does NOT rise to the occasion.

i mean i am the same way. i know how to be a good person but its so HARD, and i have made bad decisions just because i was too WEAK to do the right thing.

i dunno you could still send a messenger to say to me, she doesnt mean to metaphorically KILL you. she feels real bad about this and wants the best for you. even THAT would be a step up.


  1.  I have the right to be not thrown away like a piece of garbage when you decide to get out of this rel.
  2. You have the responsibility to not throw me like a piece of garbage when you decide to get out of this rel.

hahahahahahahah ayyyyyyy lmao.

i mean just show a little Respect for the Dignity of Human Life.

Dont Throw PEOPLE away like GARBAGE.

dont date / have secs with more than one person at a time.

this is all very r-selected behavior. we HAVE to be better than that. I want to be better than that, and my topkek m8 also wants to be better than that. choose k-selection. dont be like CRAB PEOPLE. crabs in a bucket. rat race. no. each of those squirming rats are special and have dignity. treat them as such.

also if youve known someone for 3 years, then its even WORSE if you throw them away like garbage.

this is very different than a mutual drift away, where BOTH people dont want to put too much effort into the rel.

but appreciate that this person you knew for 3 years has feelings and their feelings will be DEVASTATED if you do this to them. and then make an effort not to do that to them.

so next time some catlady dyke bitch gives you shit about ENTITLEMENT, show her the Relationships Bill Of Rights And Responsibilities, and say, and say something like, is it ENTITLEMENT to have a REASONABLE EXPECTATION that the person will not treat you like a piece of garbage?

is it ENTITLEMENT to think you deserve not to be Abused?

is it ENTITLEMENT to think you deserve to be Communicated With?

really the feminist antimale cat lady is just the Jury Of Women in my Head. the internal self critic. saying you dont deserve this and youre not entitled to this, but you DO deserve to be thrown away like garbage, because you were a horrible person to her.

went to shrink today, shrink agrees that i am not a horrible person, but shoeld have discussed that a bit more hahahaha.

how is it SO HARD for me to CONVINCE myself that i did not deserve this?

well because that woman and her opinion of me was important to me!

but yeah. she REALLY could have done a LOT better. how disappointing.

so….what do CHEATERS deserve? what do ABUSERS deserve?

this is the kind of shit i obsess over. even though i never cheated and i damn sure never abused.

well abuse is probably worse than cheating.

and abandonment/ghosting/throwing you away like a piece of garbage is…..better than cheating? worse than cheating? its probably better than ABUSE. idunno. its seems really neck and neck with cheating! at least cheaters usually pretend to show remorse and beg im sorrrrrrrry baby ill never do it again! and then they do it again.

what about abortion? where does that go on the bad things scale. worse than abuse? worse than cheating?

well i would THINK its worse than abuse, its damn killing a baby!!!!!! hahahahaah

now the jury of women says: but thats oversimplifying, and as a man, i have no place to talk. its just a nonsentient clump of cells at this point AND its a very humane compassionate choice, to spare the future child a life of hardship.

if you talk about “AGENCY” that is a DOGWHISTLE that you a shitlord racist hahahaha. because that means you are Punching Down on Oppressed Groups by Blaming the Victim, and by IMplying that Oppressed Groups had Agency in preventing or doing something about their Oppression.

Because Agency is defined according to the people in power (cis white men hahahaha) , Cis White Men Oppress Oppressed groups by taking AWAY their agency! so to say they still HAVE agency is denying that white men are oppressing them!


gr8 thread. beta autist 19 yo young man on my racistforum has a date with a Chubby Guatemalan and the talk gets REALLY real.




yeah buddy.

today i learned to never put bananas in the freezer to make them last longer. and then take a banana out and put it in the fridge overnight to “defrost” it, and it should be Good 2 Go the next day. NO IT WILL NOT. it will have brown skin and the banana inside will be TOTAL MUSH.

you can keep bananas in the fridge but never put them in the freezer ever.

when you have secs or even just cuddle with someone, you start to feel a CLOSENESS with them. IMHO this is Nature TELLING you something, and it is BAD to ignore it. say, oh, thats just an ARCHAIC ARTIFACT our brains have not evolved out of YET, but we SHOULD, because we dont live in caves any more, and casual sex is fun! so when you get feelings from casual sex, just be logical, say well i dont even KNOW this person, and realize you have to reprogram your brain so that it gets used to casual sex. our brains didnt evolve for casual sex….YET, but we can push them that way!

yeah i dont think we CAN or SHOULD.

i mean casual sex is like the root cause of sluts. because sluts think they can have secs with whomever, whenever, and its all just fun. if thats not CASUAL secs i dont know what is!

so yeah i am  an (anti) CASUAL SECS CRUSADER!!!!!!!!!!

well i had my own bad habits too. so maybe  deserve no better than a reformed slut. yeah i guess i could lower muh standards and live with that hahaha. so long as she was TRULY reformed!!!! and said yes i am honestly ashamed of what i did, heres why its wrong, and i will never go back to that way of life again!

because i feel the same way about my degeneracy. yeah it was a phase, but it was a BAD phase and im ashamed of it and never want to go back to it! and i dont think it was NECESSARY! i wish i had NEVER gone through it! i regret it! i didnt learn anythign or become a better person because of it. i wish i had avoided it altogether.

and so i think a truly reformed and rehabilitated slut will feel the same way about her slut period. wishes she had NEVER BEEN a slut, just like i wish i had NEVER BEEN a degen.

i forgot that voat is a thing, it looks and works like reddit but is less degen and antimale and antiwhite and sjw-y. better smarter people in other words. i THINK.  it doesnt have nearly as many users but i am CAUTIOUSLY optimistic it will survive. basically a reddit alternative to smart elite 115 IQ people like us who cringe in disgust at reddit hahahaha.

edit: since it is such a small community, there are not a lot of comments, and this damn degen polyamorist woman keeps showing up more than i would like with her degenerate point of view. and is not getting downvoted into oblivion like she should be hahahaha. so this particular subverse may be too tolerant of degeneracy.

guy in a rel with a depressed gf who refuses to get help

oh well why doesnt he just dump her because its never worth working on anything with someone.

that or its his fault she is derpressed and he needs to step his game up and work harder.


no they advise that she needs to get into counseling, he will probably need to make the appointment for her to get her started, and that if she refuses to cooperate, thats a legit dealbreaker.

heh. i am so CUCKED that if a gurl shows interest in other guys, i will say, ok, go hang out with him, go fook him, just make sure you make him wear a condo, and PLZ DONT DUMP ME. im not thrilled with you being with other guys but i know i dont OWN you and if this is what you need to do to make you happy and not dump me…..

and then get dumped anyway for NOT BEING THRILLED about their Polyamory hahahahahaha. i have to let them fook other people AND i have to be HAPPY about it. SORRY I cant see myself EVER being THAT cucked. thank GOD!!!!!!!!!!!

but yeah. i honestly thought she cared for me more. than i MEANT more to her, that i was more IMPORTANT in her life, that she could NEVER do something this bad to somebody that IMPORTANT to her.

and i KNOW i USED to be IMPORTANT to her because we were friends for a damn long time, and she told me i was important to her, and i believed it, and felt it!!!!! and we BOTH knew we were going through a rough patch here and probably needed to end……… but that still doesnt explain how a person just LOSES VALUE to you. you might not love or like them any more but at least recognize their VALUE as a person. their WORTH. you might feel differently about them but they’re not WORTH any less. and she treated me like i was WORTHLESS. and i was mind blown by, how can i be worth a LOT to her one year, then WORTHLESS to her no more than 1 year later???!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

i just wish she hadn’t treated me like i was SO WORTHLESS when she dumped me. she could have dumped me without treating me as WORTHLESS.

when someone is WORTH a LOT to you, and you are worth NOTHING to them. and you thought you were worth a lot more to them. because you knew them for YEARS and were friends for a long time. damn.


Do I SEEK people that are BAD for me? people that are immature and crazy and that will hurt me?

i dont think so, because the previous woman, woman2012, woman….5 i think? was mature and well adjusted and dumped me in a good way. she was a good choice for me.

also this other gurl that i liked and would have dated and had a crush on her in like 2006-7. but i had no chance because she moved to a diff state soon after i met her. we just hung out a couple times and got along real well and she was real nice to me and she was cute and nonslutty and my type of girl. plus i think she would have been mature enough to dump me in a respectful way hahahahaha.

i took her out of the numbered women lineup simply because we were never THAT close. we could have been though. there was GREAT potential.

i also took out the woman i “liked” directly after her, who was a crazy disgusting mudshark whore who was an great example of me being attracted to the Wrong people sometimes.

but woman2015, i didnt think she was the WRONG person. i thought she was a RIGHT person. she didnt seem to be CRAZY and FOOKED UP. Sure she had some daddy issues but they didnt turn her into a crazy slut. i thought she was pretty uncrazy. but what she did here drove ME fooking crazy. i honestly did not see this coming. i did not expect this out of her. she wasnt a bipolar borderline slut. she seemed STABLE.  damn.

well i had never had this done to me before. i had no idea it would hurt so bad. and i had no idea SHE would do it to me.

well thing is i think i still do mean something to her, shes just TOO SCARED to do the right thing. she is the type to get scared and run away all the time. unless the shit is unavoidable.  like she is totally in luv with someone, or lives with someone, etc.

like if i lived with her, it would be physically impossible for her to do this to me.

well, i worked with her every day, youd think that would be bad enough. youd THINK.

she didnt think this through. but when do women ever think things through? and how can the world exist when all women just dont think? BECAUSE MEN DO THEIR THINKING FOR THEM. Women face no consequences for their own bad choices, men shoulder those responsibilities too hahahah . well except if a woman has a bastard baby with a deadbeat. in some of those cases, women do actually face consewuences for bad decisions.

well except when it comes to like voting, in that case, our antiwhite enemies, do their thinking for them. yes shiksas vote for abortion and more gibs 4 single mothers hahahaha. you are a stronk independent woman dont need no man.

i am just pissed that she faces NO CONSEQUENCES FOR THIS. she doesnt feel bad, she doesnt know she did anything wrong, she still thinks I am a piece of shit and i deserved it, and she did something AWFUL, and has NO CLUE, and will probably do something like this AGAIN to some other poor sap and STILL not face consequences for it.

well life isnt fair. sometimes people DONT face consequences for doing horrible things.

heh. i should stop smoking cigarets altogether but i really dont smoke that many, less than half a pack a week atm. so today i go out to my fav tobacco store and it is closed due to fire damage. havent been there in months. funny thing is there is an Abortionist in the same plaza about 3 doors down and they were still open. but the place right next door to it was not. hehehehe. well thank magic black science man the babykiller is still open hahahahahahahahaha. i then went to another tobacco shop and the arab employees were talkign really loud in arabic hahahaha.

also i am CERTAIN the southeast asian community ie vietnamese, thai, laos, cambodians etc have been steadily increasing in our area, probably in all areas. are they better or worse than chinese? probably worse hahahaha.

heheheh woman writes in complaining about infidelity or wandering eye from man. response: dump the pig!

man writes in about woman wanting to not be exclusive. response: shame on you! you dont own her! she can do what she wants with her hot body! dont try to control her you abusive pig!

oh wow reddit actually gives good advice. young man’s gf cheat on him, lies to him, leaves him for other man, now she contacts him and wants to be Just Friends. should he accept! and reddit tells him NO. FOOK THAT BITCH. when i was expecting reddit to say of courshe! whats wrong with wanting to be friends? arent you MATURE enough to be friends? she could be a wonderful friend! and when did she ever agree to an exclusive rel? it wasnt actually cheating in the first place! and other such DEGENERATE “advice.” but reddit actually said something reasonable here hahahaha.

has a great response in there:


YourWebcamIsOn 5 points 22 hours ago
look, dude. she’s cheated before and now she wants to use her looks to get attention from men. oh yes, she just wants their money, riiiiiiight. This slippery slope couldn’t get any slicker if you turned it vertical and coated it in Teflon doused with Astroglide.
Next thing you’ll hear from her is “well, you didn’t give me enough attention and you made me feel bad about trying to get free drinks, so I went to the bar and when this cute guy offered me a drink, then another and another I just couldn’t say no and then we had sex in the bathroom and it all just happened so fast and I didn’t mean to, but this is your fault…”


hahahahaha. well memed. anyway.

so just think about it. if i posted my shit on a forum what would they say? theyd say exactly what id expect them to say. thought exercise. that it was kinda shitty for her to shut me down in that way. but shitty things happen, life isnt fair, people hurt other people, and just try to learn from this, know that all women arent like that, dont let it make you hate all women, and move on, dont waste your time with somebody who has such little respect for you.  the end.

they might disagree on whether i NEEDED to have a talk with them. well, you were giving her hints, she was picking them up, and avoiding you like the plague. that means she wasnt into you and didnt want to talk about it. yeah communication is good but that was her form of communication. which kinda sucks but theres nothing you can do about it. should have just started distancing yourself from her. you didnt really NEED to blurt it out, she was already telling you the answer, and even if you ARE autistic, it looks like you read her signals correctly.

noooo this one says i have an iq of 101 holy shit and this covers more than pattern recognition

this is terrible. i put a lot of importance on intelligence and iq and figured it was one of the only skills i had. and to find out i am COMPLETELY AVERAGE is pretty disappointing. and i KNOW i USED to be smarter when i was young! but i lost at LEAST 10% of my intelligence through my degen lifestyle of MJ and alcohol and emotional bullshit!!!!!!

AT LEAST 10%!!!!!!!!!!

i had to be at LEAST 120 or 125 when i was young!

I coulda been a phd! i coulda been an stemgineer hahahaha now i cant be anything cuz i r 2 dumm.

how the fook can i be 101! i was disappointed with 115 and wanted to take another bullshit free online iq test to get a higher score! not a LOWER one! not one that is PERFECTLY AVERAGE!

muh intelligent brain was THE ONLY THING I HAD TO OUTCOMPETE OTHERS! and the idea that i am AVERAGE INTELLIGENCE is just very heartbreaking and discouraging hahahaha.

like fooook. this was ALL I HAD. im below average everywhere else: work ethic, charisma, outgoingness. but AT LEAST i am SUPER smart. and to think i may not be super smart at ALL.

well at least i am not BELOW AVERAGE for whites hahahahahaha.

also im sure a lot of it i did to myself with MJ and alcohol before age 25. shit.

shit. i mean i know i did a stupid major in college but i didnt think you could get INTO the college i did with a lousy 101 iq!!!!! although that college thought iq b racis n sheeeeit. and back then i probably had an iq well over 101 hhahaha.

so stupid.

common courtesy. if someone begs you for mercy, try to show them a little more mercy. unless they raepd and killed your family. NOT if they gradually came to get feelings for you after being friends for a while jeez.

what do white men with 101 IQ do with their lives? well they probably shouldnt go to college and they certainly couldnt be doctors, lawyers, engineers, scientists, professors. but they could sure go to trade school and with hard work, rise to the top there! become a master electrician or plumber and own their own business ultimately and make well over 150k  a year! provided they dont get sidetracked with drugs or alcohol or gambling or alimony or other shit.

could they go to college and get a business degree? probably! could they use it to actually make 40k a year? MAYBE. it would help alot if they had good social skills, charisma, game.

i thought that it was the TRADEOFF for me having bad social skills and bad game, that i then had EXTRAORDIARY intelligence. not ORDINARY intelligence!!!!!

you cant be socially awkward AND Just Plain Average intelligence!!!!!! that is a recipe for total failure if i ever heard of one! maybe thats why i am indeed a total failure hahahaha.

i mean you dont need higher than a 101 IQ to do perfectly fine in life: get a decent job, get a decent wife, 3 or more kids.

fook. you just think that if you’re DUMBER, then you are also more mentally/emotionally stable/well adjusted. its a sign of intelligence to be CRAZY in other words.

but maybe its NOT hahahahah. to be dumb AND crazy hahaha. what a shit sandwich.

heh. an ounce of cereal has more calories than an ounce of nonlean (80/20) ground beef.

i am on a Beef Diet right now. just eat straight up beef. with minimal bread or grains. basically stuff as much beef as humanly possible into a tortilla.

im just sick of bitches dumping ME, and me getting my heart broke, and getting SET BACK with despair and failure and shit, and they just keep getting ahead in life, and feel no remorse hahahaha.

well the other bitches felt some remorse so good for them. but they still became successful and respected hahaha.

this one was the WORST. and see i thought she was the BEST. she was BETTER than any woman i had ever met, otherwise we wouldnt get along so well and become such good friends.

and then she went and did the WORST thing to me any woman has ever done, become essentially the WORST woman i ever met. and i never saw it coming. there were no real red flags. there were yellow flags that i investigated and gave the all clear. there was nothing indicating she would just throw a person away like this, i had never known her to do it before. foooooooook.

well at least then i cant really blame myself for “I SHOULDA SEEN IT COMING A MILE AWAY.” Nope. no way I COULD have.

so if anything that reflects even MORE poorly on her. like way to really spring this on this guy. not like i was SPRINGING my feelings on her. i told her in december “you are really important to me, and I hope we can hang out more and become even closer friends in 2015 if you are willing.” hehehehe pretty dead giveaway amirite? that is like the clearest signal there ever was.

OBVIOUSLY i am hung up on this. it takes time to get over hardcore shit.

BUT WHAT DO I KNOW, I ONLY HAVE A 101 IQ. I am not as smart as i thought i was, and that was the ONLY thing i had any confidence in hahhahahaha.

i am SO fooking neurotic and crazy that youd think i would HAVE to be J00ish. its unfortunate.  thing is, even if i were 1/8 J’ish, i’m still as neurotic as a FULL BLOWN J. besides, I’m more than likely no more than 1/16 J’ish, and even thats a high estimate, i am probably 99.9999999% white. i am more likely to have……i dunno. a black? a turk/saracen? somewhere in there. i mean i come from really good stock. thats why its extra super disappointing i turned out the way i did hahahahaha.

ok time to go to the fatclub and look at promiscuous 20 year old girls with skintight pants and dead souls hahahahahaha. and half of them are not white enough for me hahahahaha. arabs and turks. semites and saracens hahahaha.


heh i keep forgetting that im just an average idiot. well i WAS smart when i was 18 i can say!

ok when you do incline on the treadmill you have to NOT hold on to the rail or else it negates it somehow. i have a bad habit of holding onto the rail .

shit. maybe i was so confused at my job simply because i WASNT THAT SMART and i couldnt figure out the god damn problems because i didnt have the BRAINPOWER.

but i did top 10% in high school, i got admitted to a pretty selective college, people thought i was pretty smart, I thought i was pretty smart, basically my smart brain was the ONLY advantage i had in this world! how could I be just average 101 iq! average normies usually arent all crazy and awkward and creepy and autistic and spergy and weird. their social skills and people skills and emotional stability make up for their lack of brilliant intelligence.

well the reasonable thing to say is DONT TRUST FREE ONLINE IQ TESTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so i have seen my iq estimated at 101, 115, and around 130. wtf. 130 estimate comes from my actual ACT score. but should i trust that conversion process which estimates your IQ from you ACT score???!?!?!?!

also i got an A or an A+ in calculus 2. and i also got A’s in computer programming 2. i think that should count for something! this was AFTER i destroyed my mind with drinking and MJ!

shit. she was just being a BASIC BITCH to me, showing me none of the goodwill i thought our relationship entitled both of us to. she was just a basic bitch treating me like a basic beta orbiter. completely disregarding that we were real people who knew each other for YEARS.

that feel when someone who USED to like hanging out with you, now doesnt want to hang out with you at ALL, avoids you like the PLAGUE. it is not a confidence builder hahahaha. now they invite other cooler people to things they would have invited you to in the past, that they dont even tell you about now.  it just hurts to be pushed out of somebodys life, to be DOWNGRADED, and ultimately disposed of. how is that SO HARD for the jury of women in muh head to UNDERSTAND hahahaha.

maybe super promiscuous women would be better at dumping men in a good way, because they have been with SO MANY men. so they know the right way to dump them hahahaha. so maybe i should aim for promiscuous women hahahaha an avoid nonpromiscuous women hahahahaa.

ive never had a woman get so UPSET with me prior to the end of the rel. usually the woman has enough sense to realize that ending the rel will hurt me and upset ME, so they do it gently. here, she was mad and cold and distant for months leading up to the end. so she thinks she doesnt owe it to be nice to me when dumping me, because i was a horrible piece of shit who MADE her do this.

and i hate people getting upset at me when i am not trying to upset them.

” After a long talk she tells me that she assumed I knew that we had broken up months ago and were just living together as roommates. ”

SHE BLAMES HIM FOR NOT KNOWING THEY WERE “BROKEN UP” EVEN THOUGH SHE NEVER TOLD HIM THEY WERE BROKEN UP, SHE JUST EXPECTED HIM TO KNOW THAT THEY WERE DONE. YET STILL LIVING TOGETHER. hehehehehe. she expected him to know that they were finished. even though she NEVER TOLD HIM i wannt break up with you. wtffffffffffffffffffffff.

guy wants closure, is despairing after about a year, just cant get over it, she is now quickly engaged to some new guy.

hahahaha now this guy writes a BOOK how CREEPY guys that are this CREEPY deserve to be alone their entire lives and deserve to be dumped!

gf of 16 years just wants to walk out with no explanation, no effort, reddit says that sucks but just let the bitch walk, you deserve better, good advice reddit hahahaha

oh its his fault because he wasnt EXCITING or FUN enough because he was being the Support. but he wasnt being fun, exciting, or ambitious on himself. of COURSE she got bored and wants to leave him. who wants to be SUPPORTED hahahaha.

idiot nerd slut is confused because super awkward beta nerd doesnt know how to make secscual moves on the FIRST DATE and she asks if shes friendzoned.  these young women think its WEIRD to not get physical on the FIRST DATE. never even THINK the guy might a. be awkward b. not like SLUTS who PUT OUT on the first date hahahaha

Don’t make a priority of someone who makes you an option.

well thats a good lesson hahahahaha. and for her I WASNT EVEN AN OPTION ANY MORE.

i didnt realize that though. i didnt realize how close she was to being 100% done with the whole thing. i thought she still had SOME care for me as a person. because WHO WOULDNT? ive NEVER wanted to just be DONE with somebody without considering their feelings!

he views it as silent treatment from her, she views it as cooling off period.

it only lasts for a few hours. its a cooling off period. silent treatment is when they AVOID or IGNORE you and talking to you for DAYS and might continue to do so FOREVER.

guy is starting to get jealous because his longterm gf is texting with a male friend which borders on “an emotional affair”. some decent noncuck advice from reddit. ie, this isnt right, you shouldnt have to put up with this….not SHE CAN DO WHATEVER SHE WANTS! MONOGAMY IS MISOGYNY!!!! HOW COULD YOU EXPECT SOMEONE TO HAVE SECS WITH ONLY YOU THE REST OF THEIR LIFE?! HUMAN BEINGS ARE NOT A MONOGAMOUS SPECIES!

basically ive found that ((((REDDIT)))) is not as degen and antimale as i thought they were, in terms of defending good men in the face of evil unfaithful women hahahaha.

young collegeboi meets a Gr8 Gurl, everything is going great, he starts getting feelings….and she says NOPE just not ready for a rel right now see ya. this happens all the time. well at least they didnt have SECS because most gurls would have had SECS in this time becuase its just FUN.

like this guy gives the silent treatment for days and sounds like a real asshole hahahaha.

well i GUESS im glad i am not alone in shit getting COMPLICATED. this guy feel in love with his female friend, who just had a bad breakup with her shitty boyfraind, they broke up 10 times before, and during a recent breakup, the OP and his female friend “FOOLED AROUND” whether that means secs or just making out. anyway now hes in luv with her, shes probably for real done with the dbag bf, the OP is honest with her about his feelings, like yeah i like you, but it doesnt look hopeful. well i am sure she is confused right now too. but i would not like her to immeidately start fooking some other guy, without giving her friend OP a CHANCE.  cuz they already get along, he gets along with her mom, and he would treat her right.

heh. i created a reddit account just to upvote and save this one.

apparently a good move is to ask the girl to hang out…….but this time as an official date. heh. i dont know how you do that, when previously you have hung out As Friends. then as you start liking her, you get more NErvous abotu hanging out. Then what do you say….wanna hang out…..but this time as a Date?

heh. i was trying to do this anyway and she just avoided the shit out of it. i said heavily suggestive shit like “i wanna take you out to a fancy restaurant, im buying 🙂 ” and shit like that. rather than well lets hang out and go to dinner at normie platonic restaurant hahahaha. she had to have gotten the hint, and her putting it off was her way of saying NO. i didnt read it that way at the time though. i thought….well shes not saying NO! so in a little bit of TIME she WILL be ready and willing!

” People are endlessly fickle. The test of whether somebody really is interested in you is if they want to spend actual real time with you, texting is dangerous in my opinion for tending to create false intimacy. Be straight with her, tell her you want to meet up and spend time together on a date at a specific time. If she does not go for it I think you need to back off on the heavy texting because it is creating false hope. ”

good advice there. i think i was vulnerable to that cuz we were texting a lot but not hanging out at all, and the TEXTING gave me false hope.

its amazing how people can do things like text you every day, have SECS with you, yet they feel nothing for you. basically doing very intimate THINGS but with no intimacy invested from them. well, not that texting is inherently intimate, but i think secs IS or SHOULD BE. and i think the fact that we were texting almost every day helped me build up false hope and feel closer than we were. i wish she had either stopped responding to me or she had just agreed to HANG OUT WITH ME tho. like the guy above says, texting can go both ways. best thing is if they actually want to hang out with you.

search feelings for friend in the /rel subreddit

see, women get feelings for their MALE friends ALL THE TIME!!!!

here a woman got feelings for a male friend and HE got MAD at HER hehehehe

but yeah its kinda nice knowing that over 100 iq average normiefags can still fall in LUV and it drives them a little crazy. and they write loooooonnnnnnnggggggg posts on reddit. i thought i was the only one that wrote LONG shit. nope. if the person has feelings and is really invested, they will hae a LOT to say, not necessarily coherent, but just a LOT on their mind!!!!

” spicewoman 9 points 1 year ago
OP, I’ve had a similar situation with a long-time friend before. We had a platonic friendship for a long time (like you) before I developed feelings, and eventually reached the point where I felt I had to say something. It was the not-knowing that was driving me crazy, once we talked it out and I got him to be very clear that he did not return my feelings, it was actually surprisingly easy for me to get over it and move on.
My feelings have genuinely returned to platonic (I can’t even picture being more than friends with him nowadays, I have zero attraction and it would be weird as hell), and we’re still good friends to this day.
One of the important points to discuss with your best friend, if you didn’t already, is to be very clear that these feelings are recent. One of the issues that friendships have with this sort of thing, is that the target of your affection can feel like the friendship was a lie under false pretenses. It feels uncomfortable because it can make them question everything about your friendship up to that point. If you feel you need some time, absolutely communicate that, that you want to take some time to get over it so you can readjust to being platonic friends.
It’s up to her on her end how she reacts to all this, but if you’re really such good friends and she’s a mature and thoughtful person, she’ll be able to appreciate the honesty and the risk you took, and as long as you don’t try to pressure or guilt trip her over this, she should still be able to value you as a friend in the future once you’ve taken the time you need.   ”

well i tried to make it VERY VERY VERY clear that these feelings were recent and that the friendship was not under false pretenses, cuz i totally understood how that could be a concern. but i dont know if she read that or believed it when i sent her that message.

umm i never actually pressured her or guilt tripped her to have feelings for me, however i did pressure her to hang out with, communicate, and respond to me, because she was just avoiding me altogether and i wish she would just talk to me. but i was very clear in saying “i accept you dont have feelings for me, just please respond to me and lets try to End This Rel In A Better Way, i feel you are Throwing Me Away Like A Piece of Garbage and that hurts a lot, can you please respond to me and try to i dunno tell me you didnt mean to throw me away like a piece of garbage?”

thats all it boils down to. NOBODY likes getting thrown away like a piece of garbage. by a good friend they got feelings for. who is responding to them putting their heart out on the line and going All In, by Throwing Them Away like a piece of garbage.


not get mad at the person and throw them away like garbage.

comment from same thread as above, which i disagreed with:

”  defiantgrit -1 points 1 year ago
It’s because you put the cart so far before the horse the horse didn’t even know the cart existed.
This isn’t how relationships work and I hope you’ve learned your lesson. Life isn’t an episode of How I Met Your Mother or the Big Bang Theory. You don’t confess feelings for someone. You have to date them first. How do you know that you actually love them without being in a relationship with them first? You might be friends with someone for years. You might know them so well. You still don’t know who they are in the context of a relationship until you are in a relationship with them. Then and only then can you really decide that you love that person romantically.
Instead you decided to say you had feelings for her without ever taking her out on one date. That puts a lot of pressure on someone and tells them that your ideas about love and relationships are skewed. This is why when you do this a lot of the time you will end up rejected. You should have felt the waters out by asking her out on a date. A real date. And telling her it was a date. If she said no then you could have easily moved onto someone else.
I hope you learned your lesson here. Real romantic love is fostered on two people sharing feelings for one another. Not one person creating an over-idealized version of someone they know as a friend, pining after them, then confessing their feelings verbal diarrhea style. When you do this you’re skipping very important steps that the majority of people take when they get into healthy relationships. Most relationships start with a physical attraction and a few dates then move into a more serious relationship then move into having strong feelings for one another.
And before I have to hear from all the people who confessed feelings for a friend and are successfully married to this day however many years later, please realize your situation is the exception in this sort of situation.  ”

this redditor mixes lies with the truth hahahaha. I argue that a friendship IS a kind of relationship. you really get to KNOW somebody. and then from this you can get feelings for them and decide you want a different kind of rel with them.  in fact i think its awful that you have to get physical early. and why cant you, in the course of hanging out with your friend, tell them: hey we need to talk. I can feel my feelings changing for you. I think I am starting to get feelings for you. i dunno why its happening now. maybe its the timing. maybe i wasnt fully over bla bla when we first met. just not sure. but what is sure is that i am starting to feel something for you. would you be willing to cuddle or make out or hold hands or have drunken unprotected secs right now hahahaha lemme get some snapchats of that pulverized pvssy hahahaha

when you tell them your feelings, they reject you, but reject you nicely, BUT still want to be Just Friends, and Dont Understand why you need Space from them….. hehehehe i dd not have that problem. just COMMUNICATE with them and tell them would YOU want to see someone regularly who you liked and who rejected you? have YOU ever gotten feelings for a friend before? dont you realize, i still want you right now, i want to go out with you, and you want to be just friends. dont you see how we both want different things from each other? dont you see how this is UNBALANCED?????


99.9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% of all relship problems could be fixed with COMMUNICATION. but these bitches just dont want to or dont know how to communicate!!!!!!!!!!

TELL THEM THAT! TELL THEM the same thing youre telling REDDIT!!!!!!!!!!

there are some redditors who actual type in phrases for the OP to say. “I am feeling betrayed right now when you do this. We need to communicate about this and make sure we understand each other. I would prefer that you not fook other guys. But you have to decide if you care enough about me to honor that wish.”

yeah i admit it i didnt come clean RIGHT AWAY, but i kinda DID start sending signals right away, and gradually turning up the heat because the fire was rising within me. also she could have hung out with me ONCE in 10 months. THEN i probably would have told her a LOT earlier.

its not like “confessing secret feelings” because after a while they already have a good idea something is happening because youre acting weird. like you have feelings for them. and she certainly noticed i was acting weird. and PROBABLY knew what the weirdness meant. though i cant be sure she did.

also. when i first became friends with her i knew she was in a rel with another guy and when she was being all friendly to me i was REAL CAREFUL to watch out for things she might do that might even be close to cheating. i didnt want her to cheat on him in other words. if she threw herself at me, id be like baby, i cant enable you in cheating on anyone! you just showed me youre willing to cheat! thats fookin horrible!

so yeah, her rel with him was primary for me, and my mind couldnt even ENTERTAIN the idea of feelings for her until she was DONE with him. i dont think thats so weird. i was respected their damn rel. i really was!!!!!! goddamn it!!!! im not lying!!!!! thats the truth!!!!! and to her credit she never did anything like cheating. but i know if I had been her BF i would have been suspicious about my GF making a fun new male friend. and in fact i think she might have been TRYING to make him jealous, because he wasnt showing her that he luved her at all.

i dunno.  i just know that in 30+ years ive never been a cheater, i dont want to become a cheater. if i havent become one yet, i hopefully never will, and that gives me some hope. but it also means i dont want to be the one a cheater cheats with. cuz do you really want to be with a CHEATER?

and i really think you can separate cheaters from noncheaters, and i want to be with MY KIND. noncheaters. she was a noncheater so that was great.

have i ever been with a cheater? maybe. probably. like this crazy slut i pseudodated. she was very promiscuous and bisexual and bipolar and probably pro polyamory. and so she very probably cheated on SOMEBODY at some point cuz she fooks anything that moves, shes a slut, who doesnt view secs as some sacred bond between two and only two people. she never cheated on me….well she hung out with me, then would leave me and go fook another guy  who lived in the same house hahahahaha. but that was only a handful of times ahhaahha. and we werent exlcusively dating so it didnt count as cheating. hahahaha. well it was SHADY AS FOOK. she was willing to fook me too. any gurl thats willing to fook 2 guys in ONE DAY….very bad sign. adding that to my wife questionnaire nanahahahaha.

was it possible she was having an “emotional affair” with me? i dunno!!!! maybe!!! i never really thought of it that way but yeah its a definite maybe hahahaha. i dont think either one of us was mature or smart enough to see it that way though. and also i was very clear in supporting her rel with her bf at that time. that was my goal. i didnt even CONSIDER any feelings with her until she was DONE with him.

i tried to explain all this to her but it was a complicated situation and maybe she felt i was trying to split her and the bf up so i could get with her. although i explained it very clearly that was not the case. and we had several in depth discussions of how she could fix the rel with him. but it sounded like he didnt want to fix it, he just wanted to be done with it hahahaha. i know the feel of being on the receiving end of THAT hahaha.

but yeah i hate being essentially accused of being a liar and deceiver and betrayer, but im really NOT, and also not getting the chance to EXPLAIN myself.

i dunno. when she was with the BF, i encouraged her in that rel; and pretty soon after i got feelings for her, i tried to hang otu with her, and began turning up the signals. so i was a little cowardly, but i still think i made a GOOD FAITH EFFORT to not lie or not deceive or not hide. and then i explained all that shit in the emails that were never read.

so yeah i hate being thought of as a LIAR or a BETRAYER or a DECEIVER.

i gave a good faith effort sure……BUT IT WASNT GOOD ENOUGH.

well i mean its ON HER if i tell her something but she DOESNT WANT TO LISTEN.  she didnt HAVE To delete the long emails where i tried to explain all this. she could have read them. she could have listened. she could have RESPONDED!!!!!

i didnt LIE to you! i didnt BETRAY you! i was just scared to say the thing i was heavily hinting at the whole time and i was increasing frusting she was avoiding and avoiding and avoiding and avoiding hanging out with me!!!!!!!

wow what a clusterfook. young man and woman at different colleges, he luvs her, she wants out, dumps him, breaks his heart.

”  Be happy she had enough respect for you to not cheat on you. ” says a redditor. REALLY!!!!!! i think he is trying to be a wiseass and not be taken seriously, but this kid really is not gonna take that the right way.

NO. RESPECT IS MORE THAN SIMPLY NOT CHEATING ON YOU. RESPECT IS DUMPING YOU WITH KINDNESS hahahahahaha. RESPECT is understanding that you are causing that person pain, and it causes YOU some pain to cause them pain.



emotional porn, inspiration porn, prolefeed. real feelgood stuff in MSM to hit proles right in the feels and adult women can gush about about post on FB feeds. overcoming the odds, OR just giving a trophy to everyone, AND becoming more degenerate by the day, ie “feelgood” stories about 10 year old transgendered kids and their mom gives them sex change hormones.

anyway i had a medium epiphany:

if the criteria of whether i betrayed her or not is only if SHE FEELS betrayed, her feelings are valid, they might be wrong or confused or misunderstood, but they are still valid.

well then MY feelings are JUST AS valid, and i am MORE THAN ENTITLED to say I FEEL SUPER HURT by being thrown away like a piece of meat! inhuman and inhumane! nobody likes to be dehumanized, depoersonalized like this.

but as a believer in objective truth and morality, i also want a less subjective standard for measuring/ identifying betrayal than just her confused illogical mind saying i feeeeeeeeeeeel betrayed therefore its betrayal.

i want an INDEPENDENT TRIBUNAL to investigage impartially and provide a verdict and say she was more wrong than i was!!!!! that it wasnt really betrayal!!!!

basically, if shes ENTITLED to think i betrayed her, i’m ENTITLED to think she hurt me! cuz what she did hurt the fook out of me!

you dont get to decide youre DONE with someone, and then avoid the responsibilities of Getting Rid of them. Dump a person, break their heart, AND just essential DELETE them without ACKNOWLEDGING that you are causing a human being huge pain, a person who cares about you greatly, and whom you once cared about.  its just fooked up.

this ammon bundy is handsome as fook! hope that goy has a good looking faithful wife and 8 children.

i mean shit. yeah i can see how a woman would feel betrayed. it taps into bullshit about the friendzone and niceguys….but it also DOESNT. niceguys pretend like they have no interest. they dont say what theyre thinking. BUT a problem i long had with the media narrative about niceguys is……in the micro situation of these women HANGING OUT with these Niceguys Secretly in Luv with them, arent the niceguys GIVING OFF HINTS??? doesnt the woman have ANY CLUE that these Just Friend Guys LIKE them? something never rang true to me about the way “niceguys” were portrayed.

and this applied to me as well: i was feeling great tension and expressing that tension through increasingly heavy handed hints. i wasnt pretending i had no feelings.

AND SHE NOTICED! however i dont know if she interpreted them correctly, ie, maybe she thought “whys he being so weird,” rather than “o noes, he has FEELINGS for me, thats why hes acting so weird.”

so i was communicating something, and she was noticing it. therefore, i was not HIDING it. therefore, it was not betrayal hahaha.

but i dont even KNOW that she CONSIDERS it a betrayal, or shes JUST UGH. ENOUGH ALREADY. UGH. dont feel betrayed, i just idk. ugh idk. just want him gone.


ONLY YOUR FEELINGS MATTER. THE OTHER PERSON AND THEIR FEELINGS DONT MATTER AT ALL. thats why their heart can be broken and they can be thrown away like garbage. they dont exist, they dont matter hehehehe.

you almost NEED to ignore it and shut it out because you can ruminate and overanalyze this forever but you will never get anywhere. there are too many unknown unknowns hahahahaha. or they might be known unknowns. because we know that we dont know them. namely what did she actually think about all this. i shared my feelings with her, but she did not share her feelings with me. other than blocking me and thrown me away. this gives a pretty good indication of the feelings, but theres still unknowns: did she do this because she felt betrayed, or just because she was angry or annoyed? does it even MATTER? NO! I just HATE the idea that I BETRAYED somebody.

I DONT BETRAY PEOPLE. I AM TRUSTWORTHY ALWAYS. This is very important to me.

you can hate me and be angry at me, just dont call me a traitor or betrayer or liar or someone you cannot trust.  that is very triggering and rustling to me.

i mean ive done some shitty things im not proud of……but i do those things much much more to MYSELF than i do to OTHER PEOPLE. whereas it seems that normies are more likely to do shitty things to other people, and not to themselves.


had dream where i was going back to muh job after months. i was in a bus with several of my favorite people from the job, and they were very nice and supportive, and we were all heading out there fr another horrible shift hahaha. there was complaining and grumbling about how horrible things were. how some people just “couldnt take it anymore” and just walked out, disappeared, stopped coming to WORK. there was a person on the bus talking about how she tried to speak with the main manager about something important, and was bitched out about interrupting the manager who had very important valuable work and couldnt waste time. you wanted to talk the manager, you set up an APPOINTMENT!!!!!! and then after being shooed away, they eavesdropped on the manager who was having a very lively and spirited and happy and hilarious conversation with somebody in a “gypsy language”, presumably romani/roma. but obviously not SRS BUSINESS.

and then i thought, oh shit, THAT WOMAN is gonna be there too. and i dont want to see her AT ALL. I am just gonna have to quit again! why did i agree to come back! and felt very nervous and dreadful. how was i gonna survive this life? this horrible job! AND ON TOP OF IT, having to see that woman every day, hating me and ignoring me, and i would probably confront her and she would be a huge bitch and portray me as the bad guy! why was i coming back here? oh god i hope this is just a horrible DREAM!

and IT WAS! so that dream kinda made me feel better about my controversial decision hahahaha.

how can she shit on ME and then still be mad at ME and make other people think IM the bad guy! she should be ASHAMED of what she did, yet she’s DOUBLING DOWN on her bitchiness and anger and hate towards me, when she’s ALREADY broken my heart, then she rationalizes it to herself that i DESERVED it!

what a MINDFOOK!!!!

and the job is already stoopid as fook, AND i have to deal with this woman on top of it? no thank you!

and i wish i could switch to pure hate so easily like she has. but ultimately i will always be in luv with her and always want her, so its like breaking my heart every day.

so the dream was actually good in that it reminded me that i made the right choice in doing what i did haha.

i betrayed her??!?!?!!?! SHE BETRAYED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!! well i know it might not be a technical betrayal, but it was MUCH CLOSER to the realm of betrayal than what i did to her!!!!!

women wait until you get very close to them, fall in luv with them, then they totally CRUSH you. tear your heart out, stab it 900000000000000000000 times, after you have invested in them, gone all in with them…..and then you lose EVERYTHING and emerge as a totally broken ruined soul. they couldnt just dump you when you had invested just a LITTLE in them. they wait until you are madly in true lifelong luv with them, before they pull the rug out from underneath you. do they like ruining mens lives for NO REASON?????


no, if anything, no i have more respect for the other women who dumped me in a more appropriate kind manner. even if it wasnt perfect, they MADE AN EFFORT and recognized that i would be hurt, and they cared enough about that to TRY to do the right thing.

and less respect for HER, because she did NONE of this. made no effort.

make an effort. write 1 damn email.

thats what mindfooks me so much, is ultimately, how could she do this to ME? i knew she didnt LUV me, but i thought she CARED ABOUT ME AS A PERSON more than to do this to me. you just dont treat a person this way ever. unless they did something really really bad to you, and even THEN, its STILL better for you to take the high road than to descend into the muck with the person who did you wrong. DONT STOOP TO THEIR LEVEL. BE THE BETTER PERSON.

i thought there was more GOODWILL built up. even if i was on the OUTS with somebody, i wouldnt throw them away. i would appreciate them as a mostly decent person that i had good times with. i NEVER had big falling outs with people. usually we just Fade Away or Drift Away and are both on somewhat good terms at the end. but never huge falling outs, unless a woman is dumping me. and most times, heck ALL times till NOW, the woman made SOME kind of EFFORT to dump in a good way, to indicate that it wasnt my FAULT, that i did not do something horribly WRONG. basically its not you its me (meaning them, and dont blame yourself.)

SHE did the exact opposite, essentially saying YOU SHOULD BLAME YOURSELF. THIS IS YOUR FAULT. and i could not handle that. especially when im honestly not sure that it IS my fault. but on a bad day i can sure beleive that it was! and need to convince myself that it wasnt!

i always see people doing a damn incline on the treadmill and it looks ridiculous, but the calories they burn are also enviable. the best is a weird 35 year old virgin looking man who does a full hour at like 5.5 mph and at least 10% incline (article recommends no more than 7.) this results in him burning at least 1000 calories in an hour, when i have to work hard to just do 500 an hour!!!!

well hes a weird virgin but hes not fat i tell ya!

so i wanted to look up some info about inclines. does it REALLY burn that MUCH MORE calories? initial evidence suggests yes, it actually works. maybe. hahahahhaa.

anyway. i just couldnt imagine how a person could do that to another. i cant wrap my mind around it.

even if a bitch cheated on me i would forgive her immediately, just please dont leave me. oh you can still see him, just tell me if you fook any other guys too, just dont dump me. i will let you do whatever you want as long as you please dont dump me.

this has always been my MO, because i HATE being dumped!!!! and that was when i was getting dumped NICELY! now i will hate getting dumped even MORE!

and yeah i would not be as surprised if this were someone i didnt know. some random bitch. but i actually KNEW her. i was once her friend. just because my feelings change for you doesnt mean you get to treat me like garbage. if i had a friend whose feelings changed for me, i wouldnt hate them, id still care for them, and id feel bad abotu not being able to reciprocate, and i would make a BIG effort to let them down as GENTLY as possible….not make NO effort and let them down as HARSHLY as possible! see how its such a big shocking mindfook!!!!!

and part of me wants to TELL her this, just for satisfaction, just for standing up for myself. when somebody shits on you hardcore, you stand up for yourself and say NO! NOT OK!!! and make sure they KNOW that what theyre doing is HORRIBLE! righteous indignation!!!!!

and i kinda did this in extremely nice, not angry, not blaming language, like yeah i see where youre coming from but i also think i did not deserve to be treated this way, i really dont think i betrayed you, lets just talk about this please.

rather than: you CANNOT do this, this is HORRIBLE, you SHOULD feel ashamed, you did a HORRIBLE thing and i want you to fully know it! SHAME ON YOU!!!!!

i never wanted to end a rel with such prejudice before. like i say, 99% of my rels that end, do so on a mutual drifting away with no real hard feelings. ive never just wanted to just GET RID of somebody. the women who dumped me, i always wanted to reconcile. my college roomate i had a big feud with, well i wanted to get rid of him. but even there the feeling was MUTUAL!  he wasnt BEGGING ME TO RECONCILE!!!! he hated me, i hated him!

when someone begs you for better closure, try to give them better closure.

KNOWING of course that all closure ultimately comes from within…….but the other person can CERTAINLY ease that along. being that they are in the rel with you, and they are dumping you. they can start you off with some good closure if they are willing. and why wouldnt they be willing?

i assumed from the years of goodwill, that she would be willing to lift a finger to give me at least a LITTLE good closure.

maybe in the future i will end up feeling hate and contempt for her, recognizing what a cowardly shitty thing she did to me. but to get to that point i have to stop wanting to reconcile with her!!!!!!

so THIS is the person i wanted to have a long term rel with? what if i was? what i married her and had chirren with her? how would that turn out! HARRIBLE!!!!

whats better, a woman who has been with 15+ guys, or a woman who has been with 2 guys but had 1 abortion?

whats better, a woman who has been with 10+ white guys, or a woman who has been with 2 guys, but one of them was nonwhite?

these sound like retarded philosophy thought experiments, but these are real world questions you have to ask when evaluating the long term wife potential of women!!!!!! its INSANE!!!!!

well, you figure activities like abortions and mudsharking are CORRELATED with being a slut. in other words, if a woman has been with a LOT of guys, chances are, she’s had SEVERAL abortions, and been with SEVERAL nonwhites.

you dont expect abortions and mudsharking out of a woman with a LOW number, in other words. but sometimes it happens!!!!

i dont like abortions, i dont like mudsharking, and i dont like SLUTS. but you cant have all three.

I’m not even sure if you can have TWO.

so, if you are dead set against a mudshark, then you have to accept that she’s been with a LOT of white guys and has had several abortions.

if you’re dead set against abortions, thats your dealbreaker, then she’s probably a slut, probably been with several black guys, and if she doesnt do abortions, then she probably has some bastard kids! and prob not white ones!

hehehe this is why men give up on women and go mgtow.

oh yeah i dont like when they have kids.

but you figure if they are enough pro abortion, they will just abort those kids.

so whats better, a woman who aborts their kids and thus has no kids, or a woman with bastard kids.

THESE are the questions you must deal with regarding the REAL PEOPLE who you are really interviewing for the role of your actual WIFE!!!!!

you get put in between such a rock and a hard place, and you say, well this is a total shit sandwich, cant i find a woman who fits BOTH criteria? has no abortions and ALSO has no kids? why is that TOO MUCH TO ASK in the current year? have the merchants destroyed ALL our women?

despair. making concessions. settling for less hahahaha. coming to believe your requirements are too much, your standards are too high. LOWER YOUR STANDARDS.

LOWER YOUR STANDARDS for your lifelong wife and the mother of your children.

see how shitty that is?

spend the rest of your life with and have kids with a piece of shit. mix your dna with them, and your kids will be half a piece of shit.

i wanted to communicate with her so i was pushing her to hang out.

if she wanted to commnicate with me, she would have been pushing me to hang out. 

and being that i also wanted to communicate, there would have been no pushing! we would have just communicated in a timely manner.

rather than me pushing to communicate, and her AVOIDING communicating. if she wanted to communicate, i wouldnt have NEEDED TO PUSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

new browser brave from shamed mozilla founder brendan eich, who was forced out of firefox because he was against gay marriage. now he has founded with a bunch of j00s and SJW feminist techies hahahaha. but maybe they actually know their stuff. god knows i dont have the expertise to say if they do or not!!! i hate tech because its too confusing and there seems no pathway to figure it all out!! so when “cute” little 24 azn girls

start talking about code, im like, ya lost me at jquery. i dont even know how to javascript. yet a 24 year old azn girl who dropped out of high school, got a physics degree from MIT, then started a phd in CS at stanford, then dropped out, is now 24 or 25 years old, and gives talks at tech conferences all the time, and has Thirsty Leftist Tech Guys who make 100k+ a year lusting after her, is a senior developer on this browser hahahaha i do get frustrated. i took a bunch of tech classes to try to learn this stuff but it still doesnt make sense. its not that im an idiot, its more like i wasnt OBSESSED and Passionate the way these people are, coding 24 hours a day. after a while i had to say fook this shit i hate it, get it away from me.

so you gotta LUV it to be a damn programmer?

i was ultimately convinced i didnt have “what it takes” to be a CS major and get a CS/programming job. that you have to Love Programming and Tech in every fiber of your being; eat sleep and breathe this shit, and i certainly didnt. i just saw it as a means to an end, just wanted to be qualified for the lowest possible entry level tech job.

which as it turns out, is Tech Support, and you dont need ANY CS experience for that, and you just answer phones all day, and are confused and frustrated and nervous all day because you have no confidence that you know what youre doing, and are trying to bullshit to people all day. and then you quit because you just cant handle it any more and you fell in luv with your female friend at the job who just totally threw you under the bus!!!!!!

anyway, brave focuses on eliminating the Ad Bullshit and on being FAST. and also is concerned with privacy and not harvesting your information like j00gle chrome. seems promising so i downloaded the “developers build” and was able to open it and yes it does go pretty fast. it really does seem to go faster than chrome.

thats really what i care about. is it bloated? is it fast? does it have weird backdoors and shit and spy on me? are my main concerns.

and i jealous of young people that get to turn their AUTISM into a SUCCESSFUL CAREER cuz they can get THAT GOOD at understanding code because theyre damn AUTISTICALLY OBSESSED about coding.

this is why you should introduce kids to coding in FIRST GRADE and HOPE it sticks. then they get obsessed with it and teach themselves to code.

so yeah coding is a valuable skill for people to have, BUT…….not if you can just do stupid hello world shit like me. coding is only valuable if you can code at the level of a good CS graduate. now you dont actually have to have the degree, but you DO need to outperform good CS graduates.  can you do that? it takes a LOT of TISM to be able to do that.

i have some tism but not for that. my tism is basically for talking about Feelings and Women hahahaha.

these arent even philosophical, intellectual, masculine discussions. its totally feminine.  but i still cant talk TO WOMEN about it.

because not only are women Emotionally ILLITERATE, they speak an entirely different emotional LANGUAGE than men. i was very literate and articulate in my emotional language, but i couldnt communicate SHIT to her or actually her to me.

i talk about feelings all the time, too much, WAY too much, yet i couldnt communicate with her. i could just use stupid SIGNALS. and she could just use stupid SIGNALS. her signals were worse than mine! she didnt signal she was just gonna up and walk out and throw me away! i didnt see THAT coming!!!!!!

how do you drop out of high school and get into MIT?

how do you get a degree in PHYSICS but then go for a phd in CS?

i mean physics IS super respectable, its just super different than CS! why not get a BS in CS?

how do you get into a CS Phd at STANFORD, a decent skool? i mean its prob not as good as caltech or mit for CS, but its still good enough to get you a good 200k+ job.

you gotta work hard, make sacrifices, and be a little bit crazy / autistic / obsessed. and never get sidetracked from that goal by emotions or despair or life or setbacks or failures or rejections.

yet so many phd’s are batshit crazy, taking boatloads of psych meds. all of them are on ssri’s, and half of em are bipolar.

yet they still produce good work? well im talking about the tech ones. i mean CODE itself cant be fooking marxist to its core, thats one thing i like about code, compared to writing books and papers and articles that are marxist and antiwhite in their very fiber of being. code is not like that.

but that doesnt stop good coders from being sick marxist antiwhite SJW’s wanting ladybosses and more women in tech and teach girls to code etc.

what does it matter if you teach girls to write hello world code, if you have to be a DAMN GOOD CODER to get a damn tech job??????? it doesnt add up to me. you have to make the children AUTISTIC about coding so they build good coding skills and dont give it up.

i started, but i gave up, because it was super frustrating and i couldnt see it going anywhere!!!!!

i was kinda proud of the super complicated shit i did in C++, but i didnt feel ANY closer to what Real Coders did for Work!!!!! i still didnt understand the shit that 25 year old asian gurl MIT grads wrote about on their hacking/security blogs.

now im sure that gurl does do decent work. good for her. but i wonder if she would have gotten so far at such a young age, if she wasnt a hip qt little asian gurl who dresses like a cyberpunk slut when she gives tech talks, and Thirst Betas drooling over her asian ass hahahahaha. and i am SURE she has been with a LOT of guys, and i am SURE she is HORRIBLE to be in a rel with. because shes an autistic, successful, independent, stronk woman who has lots of wealthy guys showering her with attention all over the world.

just to clarify, yes im sure she does good work and probably deserves a good job in tech. i could never code that well because i dont have the code thirst hahahaha. i only took like 7 tech classes in college hahaha.  i dont know what node.js is. i dont know how to use a sniffer or why you would even use a sniffer or scraper. i know how to type tracert into a command prompt but i dont know what its telling me.

there were at least 3 young men at my shitty confusing tech support job who had full blown BS in CS degrees. not from MIT of courshe!!!!!!!!!!! and probably they were a lot like me: they saw this as a good meal ticket, a useful skill you could get a good job with…..but they were NOT AUTISTIC about it, they were just average coders, followers not leaders, they probably didnt understand node.js either, they just did the work and got their degree but did not have a github page filled with impressive personal projects. therefore they could not outcompete top american coders, and not get an entry level coding job, and therefore had to settle for a damn tech support job, with people without degrees, people with humanities degrees, people without A+ certification, etc. in other words if i got a CS degree i wouldnt get any further ahead than where i was. and getting a CS degree is hard as hell. “even” for these guys. it takes 4 hard years of full time hard CS courses! even being an average or below average CS grad is not a small achievement in my book!

its good to want to be the best……but you also have to make that want a reality, by ACTUALLY OUTPERFORMING everybody else and BEING the best. otherwise you just get stuck in a shitty job that literally drives you crazy and gives you a nervous breakdown and makes you Mentally Disabled 4 Lyfe! and now youre a damn HANDICAPPED person who needs DISABILITY payments because you CANT WORK, and you CANT LYFE. fook that shit.

while some gurl who is nowhere near as smart as you, and doesnt even know how to hello world, just goes with the flow and keeps makin the monay. im kinda jealous of HER!!!!!!

how could she NOT know i was hurting? in my email she never read and maybe doesnt even know i sent, i told her i was hurting. but the biggest signal was that i quit muh job because of her.

i never had someone quit their job because of me!!!!!

i like to think i would reach out to them and say WHOA HEY COME ON, you dont have to go THAT far, come on, DONT DO THAT, lets smooth things over and come up with an arrangment where you dont have to do that, we can still work together!

nope, no effort at that from her. and yes i DID want something like that from her! i wanted some sort of communication! and some sort of KINDNESS. why couldnt she show me even a SHRED of sympathy or kindness???!?!?!?! i didnt stab her in the back or the heart! we were friends for almost 3 years!

if you use a cigaret making machine, try to buy the same brand filter tubes as the brand of your machine. like premier or top. actually the gambler tubes worked allright for me even though i have a premier machine.

I ACTED IN GOOD FAITH with her at all times. even if i was scared to tell her an important thing. i always acted in good faith. i dont see how she could POSSIBLY act in good faith when she……….throws me away like a piece of garbage. there is no way you can do that in good faith.

GOOGLE thrown away like a piece of garbage

hahahahaha    archive of ^^^^ this one

uhhh she did not present those warning signs, did not seem overly selfish or narciss. but heres a good point:


Another generality is deep-seeded selfishness. Now before you rebel at this, let’s look at some of the ways that selfishness gets disguised. People who throw others away will use such justifications as…I didn’t love him/her anymore. or There were just too many problems. It was overwhelming. or The relationship got stale. We just weren’t growing. Underneath all of these justifications is a theme of Me Me Me. I don’t want to be with someone I no longer love. I don’t want to do the hard work that could repair this relationship. I don’t want to be bored. The basic underlying characteristic of a relationship is that it consists of two people…not one. People who are that deeply selfish, need to stay out of relationships. But we know this isn’t going to happen, because they won’t be honest with themselves and attempt to change. They will continue to leave destruction and pain in their paths.


broke up with him for no reason, he feels thrown away like a you know what, searched term on r/relships hahahaha

this ones pretty good too. he had her FB password and would log in and spy on her after the breakup to see that she fooked a new guy within 2 weeks and loved him, and said he was so much better than her xbf (the OP!) who was sitting there secretly reading these chats. thank god i never did that!!!!!!

he went through a horrible breakup, found a better woman, but they had to break up due to “circumstance”, probably somebody moving for a Career hahahaha. he is 24 and some kind of grad with a Career and even though he had 2 breakups that were worse than mine, and was devastated, he managed to start his career at a young age. maybe this was because he was not a drinker hahahahah or maybe he was an autisticcally talented coder from a good skool hahahaha and companies where competing to give him jobs hahaha.

basically the point is the man is always wrong, the woman is always right. if the man asks for advice, women tell him, oh heres all the things you did wrong that you didnt realize, now go beg for forgiveness. actually begging is bad, just g and be more perfect and hope she doesnt dump you, you dont deserve her hahahaha. she can do whatever she wants to you and you have to TAKE IT cuz its ALL ABOUT HER, ME ME ME ME ME, and if you dont like it, you can get out, you cant HANDLE such an AWESOME woman, youre no MAN enough to DESERVE her, if you cant HANDLE her at her worst, you dont DESERVE her at her best, or even when she’s being merely not shitty,

you woman hating needle dicked f4ggot rapey entitled niceguy creeper weirdo weak cowardly bitter hateful immature insecure clingy needy thirsty mamas boy!

like if you tell the gf she is acting like a child because she is throwing a stupid tantrum….YOURE the bad guy for talking to her like shes a CHILD. even though she is totally acting like a retarded bratty CHILD.


anyway. if i ever wanted to GET RID of somebody, i MIGHT avoid them, but if they came at me begging for closure, begging for me to talk to them, and be nicer, i like to think i would be mature enough to say, wow, they are really hurting, i dont want to be responsible for that, im gonna at least try to SHOW THEM that im trying to let them down gently. that im making an effort, that i DONT want to HURT them.

hehhehehe and i am wasting SO MUCH precious time and money mourning over some woman who doesnt deserve it! shes making 15 DAH while i am making 0 DAH! more than 15 times what im making!!!!!!!  when i should not even be thinking about her ever, and making 16DAH while im doing it!!!!!!!!!!

so basically if someone does something, and you think, wow, i NEVER thought they could do something liek THAT to ME!!!!! then whats to say other people also wont hurt you in shocking, surprising, unknown unknown ways??? ways that you can never fathom or predict or understand or even prepare for or defend against?

they will find chinks in your armor you didnt even know were there, and slip the fookin sword in!!!!

bitches can



i couldnt remember what that word meant. i should not have looked it up hahahaha.

it just boggles my mind how much some stupid woman can hurt you, namely because you luv them TOO MUCH; and its mind boggling how DEGENERATE people can be. like her going off and jelqing dix of guys she just met. its just SO degen to be a slut doing promiscuous casual sex, it disgusts me SO much and makes me SO angry that women ruin themselves in such a disgraceful way. how can you make wives and mothers out of these pigs? i mean they would have to go through an INTENSIVE repentance and rehabilitation project.

so shes fooking guys, making videos, they are seeing and doing things i could only DREAM of, i never got to make out with her or cuddling with her, yet here they are fooking her up the ass and they dont even know each other or trust each other. something just seems so wrong about that. to indulge every sexual desire as quickly as possible. before getting to know each other.

how long does it take to really get to KNOW somebody?

at least a YEAR.

so wait at least a YEAR before having secs with a guy. bitches.

oh but he was so charming and secsy. i had no responsibility in the matter.

so youre saying you didnt consent? fook that shit. just make the CHOICE to CLOSE YOUR LEGS, WHORE.

say it with me: CLOSE YOUR LEGS, WHORE.



very very very very very very hard, apparently.


yes. the woman you wanted to commit to and spend your life with and have children with, dumps you without a word, and goes and does PORNO DEGEN shit with random sleazy strangers, shit that makes schlomo rub his hands and say GOOD GOY, yes, discover yourself secsually, its so liberating, and theres nothing wrong with it!

so then women tell you, well you dont own her, she can make her own decisions, and if shes consenting to the promiscuous, pornographic secs, its all good.

well its true its her body and she can do whatever she wants. that doesnt make pornographic secs good or right or moral.

and all the worse when you were prepared to make real sacrifices for this woman, build a future with her. then she throws you away without a word.  now i have no PROOF she is out doing degenerate porno secs, but it wouldnt really surprise me. NOTHING would surprise me after the big surprise she gave me. if shes capable of THAT, shes capable of ANYTHING. abuse. abortion. torture. cheating. mvrder. degeneracy. promiscuous. porno. open rels. slippery slope. where does the degeneracy end??/?????!?!?!?! who knows??!?!?!?!

but i KNOW she USED to be a decent person. she wasnt hiding this secret alter ego from me all along. theres not even a secret alter ego i can blame it on. its just one big bad decision. in fact shes probably NOT having degen secs with randos, rather shes continuing being a Nice Gurl with her family, like she always was.

i just wish she had some REMORSE for this. and hadnt made such a BIG mistake. or at least showed REMORSE for it.

i did this in like 20 out of 40 minutes and got a damn 115 IQ. that does not make me feel good about myself. i always thought i was more like 125 at least hahahahahaha. 115. i am a fooking idiot. i r not smart enough to become a stem master hahahaha.

i am the dumbest person on the trs forums hahaha

i could probably get a little higher if i got a few more questions right. its all pattern recognition but some of those patterns are RIDICULOUS mufooka. i guessed outright at at least 3 out of 40.



june 20 thursday

yeah buddy. see, when you work a “double” in a restaurant you work 16 hours, straight serving idiots with no break. and when it gets slow, then you get CUT, which means they tell you to go F yourself. I can’t even.

My job is low-stress partial customer service, and not like mcdonalds, which I would qualify as high stress mostly customer service, but that I can actually use the computer and type stuff like this (into a gmail draft, I don’t actually go to wordpress!) when I am not Serving Morons or doing Side Work. My kinda job. apparently there are Office Monkeys who look at Reddit and Facebook most of the DAY. Perfect Job. Only I would be looking at 4chan and other intelligent stuff. But 4chan is blocked at my place. Oh Well. I am thankful not to be in a RESTAURANT, or MCDONALDS, serving idiots ALL DAY, doing side work ALL THE TIME, and getting CUT when there’s no idiots or side work. However I gotta step my game up and move to the next rung on the Sweet $10 an hour Upper Working Class Office Job Ladder, because this is really a NECKBEARD NEET job at the moment. (noting that technically, NEETs are by DEFINITION Unemployed.)

I do NOT want to talk about my “JOB” much more, lest my feminist enemies try to get me FIRED from even THAT! I make LESS money than FEMINIST JOURNALISTS! I cannot afford to have a family, a Life Partner, A Sex Life, A Love Life, Health Care, a House, etc, whereas they can, because they were True Believers in the Cult Of College and thus enthusiastically did what they had to do to get a well-paid career. Of course, the Most Famous Journalist does NOT make nearly as much as The Average Middle-Tier Engineer! And good for THEM! (The engineers.)

* If the corners of your mouth get dry/cracked/sore and disgusting/hideous, that is actually a FUNGUS and you should use an Anti FUNGAL Cream. Very embarrassing, not good for the confidence. it is also painful whenever you open your mouth too wide. I got this REAL bad first about a year ago, tried a bunch of stuff: rubbing it with VINEGAR, rubbing it with Antibacterial Soap, rubbing it with Listerine, taking an Iron Supplement, applying vinegar then “sealing” it with vaseline, and nothing worked, it just keep looking worse and feeling worse. So I read something saying “perleche” or “angular cheilitis” was either a fungus or a bacteria or a virus, so start off with Anti Fungus cream. So I did and that actually worked and bretty soon it was gone, and I felt a lot better. And now it’s starting to come back, to my horror, but at least I know how to try to treat it, and I still have plenty of Cream left over. Just wish I knew what CAUSED the fungus. I think it was the same time last year that I first got it, like the beginning of summer. WEIRD.

yeah it’s a real NECKBEARD NEET LOSER thing to get too. But that’s how you get rid of it quickly. Go Buy Walmart Brand Athletes Foot Cream and put it on yo MOUTH hahaha.

* Hmm there’s this Working Life In An Office Reality Show On Fox called “Who’s gotta go” or something like that. Totally my wheelhouse here. Showing the office monkeys and how some of them work real hard and others of them work hardly at all, and stupid Office Drama, and the Call Center Neckbeard Fat Hateful Virgin makes 19k a year and the Outgoing Sales Guy makes 60k a year and so on and so forth.

There’s a reason “HOW MUCH DO YOU MAKE” is such an offensive question. It really cuts to the core. And I think A Sizeable Amount (but how much?) Of Arrogant Baby Boomers are “grandfathered” into Well-paying jobs, that if the Sh1t Hit The Fan and they lost their job today, they’d SEE how much their Actual Skills Are Actually WORTH. $10 an hour if they’re LUCKY. Go f00k yourself. We’re replacing you with a 23 year old MBA who will work for Half The Price and YOU don’t even have a College Degree Let Alone An MBA??? F00k You GO Die On The STREETS, you don’t deserve to have a Wife And Kids.

Ok see that was an example of Excessive ANGER.

Heh. Just saying there’s more competition out there for All Jobs than Ever Before, AND that A College Education gets you Less Than Ever Before. That’s all. So if you didn’t finish your degree, or you’re older, or you were an Average Student…. Welcome To The Underclass. And good luck trying to Survive in the underclass, let alone Find A Waifu and raise a Happy Little Traditional Family!

* Many Times it’s so easy to get DISTRACTED by your WORRIES that you can’t DO anything, can’t FOCUS on anything. Reading a BOOK is the hardest. Or doing Homework, or Critical Thinking, or Creative Thinking, or any kind of Constructive Thinking at all, cause all you can THINK about is what a Huge Loser you are. Yep so this is def a great example of Rumination and or Cognitive Distortions. Tell yourself that you have Ruminated Long Enough (because any Rumination beyond 2 minutes is Prob Too Much!), and then also tell yourself you’re not a TOTAL loser. Because Total Losers aren’t Smart and Virtuous like You Are.