oct 31 thurs, 8.21pm
well i have an afternoon shift, lemme just tell ya it has been DEAD since about 6:30 pm, jeezum crow. This is about 90000000000000000000000000000000000 more chill than when I usually underwork in the morning: 90000000 more customers, noise, AND micromgt. here, I am king of the castle, but feel I should be getting paid less. heh. or get paid MORE for the morning. SUCH a difference. ORDERS OF MAGNITUDE. just wanted to officially state that.
also wanted to officially state that as of OCt 2013 I think I am up 2000 chips on pokerstars. Because: they start you out with 2000 chips. I lost that pretty fast, like in 1 day, not used to their tables, prob went to a higher stakes table and was fast and loose just to see what would happen when you run out of chips. Would you have to pay cash to buy play chips? No, as soon as you lose it all, they just give you 2000 more, for free, like they SHOULD.
So now I just combine the two and say they started me out with 4000 chips, this just makes sense. and I turned that 4000 into 6000, playing only at the bottom of the barrel tables: 1&2 blinds, and 200 buy in MAXIMUM. You cannot bring more than 200 chips to the table!!!
So, 2000 “dollar” “profit” in something like 3 weeks. 21 days. Kinda close to muh $100 a day rule. NOT BAD, UH???? playing against real people, and not getting any “bonus chips” from the house, not that the moron real players need any push to Start Betting.
* Protip: Go on the internet and see if you can find any local meetups for people who play The Nerdiest Games in the World, like Dungeons and Dragons or The Settlers Of Catan. Then meet up with them, bring a case of semifancy beer or booze, and boom, instant social life for you. The women, if there are any, and 90% chance there won’t be, will be so ugly you couldn’t even do them doggystyle, but we gotta Move The Goalposts for this one, Manage Expectations, and let me tell you the objective with THIS protip was NEVER to meet women, but to just go from Friendless Neet to Nonneet with a Social Life and Male (Dork) Friends. You want to meet women, then just start lifting and acting like an Alpha. Be Masculine.
* Get a Hotel Room by yourself for the night and DO MUSHROOMS. That might give you a different perspective on life, Reset Your Brain. Warning: if you are taking SSRI’s, this might flood your brain with Too Much Serotinin and You will DIE. So don’t do that. Do Cold Turkey off SSRIs beforehand, get those out of your system, and maybe do some Hillbilly Heroin with the Mushrooms just so you’re more chilled out going into it. Warning: Don’t Do Drugs. This is just for hypothetical, fictional purposes only.
* Or just get a hotel room for the night and tell some 26yo nonhooker that you’ll pay her to make a pr0n with you, then do it, comfortable with the fact that she’s not an official hooker and might look better than such, unless you have a decent hooker selection in your area. And then do her doggystyle, reverse cowgirl, and seated reverse cowgirl, but do NOT let her SOYF unless she passes the HNNNGGGGG test.
* Get a Rain Slicker or Poncho that you can wear while Walking In the Rain, it prob won’t get destroyed as easily as an umbrella on a windy day.
nov 3 sun
compelled to write today because of dream had last night starring Girl 4. First Fell in True Marriage Babbies Family Lifelong Monogamous Luv with Girl 4 in 2005, 8 years ago, I was young then, not old. The dream was basically just me Cuddling with her, I don’t even think there was Making OUt. Just straight cuddling, and her smiling and being happy to cuddle with me. This was notable because she was a total Cold Fish, suspected virgin, asexual, possible dyke if anything, qualities that surfaced again in Girl 7. But I prob liked Girl 4 a teensy bit better, in some ways, maybe she was my favourite girl ever. Anyway point is, she didn’t go around cuddling with dudes, with anyone, so for her to do this dream cuddling with me was a real big deal.
I felt like the worlds happiest alpha, this was the #1 thing I wanted out of life, and now that I had it/her, I could start living, dominating and succeeding in career, life, etc, with her by muh side.
Then for part 2 of the dream, I had a real busy long day, but it was ok, because I knew I was going to see her at the end of it all and we would cuddle again. No sitting on muh face, no reverse cowgirl, no doggystyle, just straight virgin cuddling.
This is how you know you’re in true luv with a grill – cuddling with her is more fun than banging some rando.
I think near the end The Seed Of Doubt started to creep in, like: when’s this gonna end? when’s the sh1t gonna hit the fan? when’s she gonna dump me? when’s the day gonna come that I DON’T have her to come home to and cuddle with at the end of a long day? I think it might be coming sooner than I’d like, I worry I like her more than she likes me, etc.
I don’t recall that I did get to cuddle with her a second time in the dream, I just woke up.
So when you have a dream like that, it brings the grill back to life after 8 years. (Although to be fair, I was prob still semi in love w her throughout 2006 as well, and only 2007 that the luv started to fade.
So that was kinda weird, esp when Girl 7 was the most recent Girl, and I haven’t felt that “Lovin Feelin” since Girl 7 “dumped” me (hehehehe) in Oct 2012, over a year ago. Now I just want to bang grills. 18yos, 21 yos, and now 26 yos. bang bang bang, no respect or liking or luv or cuddling.. just being a decadent filthy animal. this bothers me a little and not a lot, but you’re damn right I would much prefer to have a grill like girl 4 or girl 7, and damned if you can’t get reminded of that every once in a while through a Poignant Dream. Thankfully does not happen more than once every couple months tho, thank GOD.
anyway I screwed it up with Girl 4 because I was a loser who drank too much and didn’t have a Career Plan; I screwed it up with Girl 7 because I was an OLD loser with no career plan even though I had quit drinking by then. And I was not MASCULINE or Alpha enough with either of them. Lessons Learned!
- Would you Pay a Stranger to Cuddle You? (ksfm.cbslocal.com)
- Stefan Molyneux, Twitter (upfrommorallylazyloserness.wordpress.com)
- Gamble at the Unholy Casino or Gamble at the Regular Casino? (upfrommorallylazyloserness.wordpress.com)