PRON IS WORSE THAN BEING A SL00T

jan 26

http://mpcdot.com/forums/topic/8227-why-pornography-is-bad-for-you/#entry190803

i might have linked this already, worth reading again hehe

found it in comments to this vid

wish weev had some cooler people with him and not those dumb women, but women luv weev for reasons i shouldnt’ need to mansplain. they would fly halfway across the world to have weevs babies. and i definitely want weev to have many hwyte babies.

heh i am much more attached and hero worshipping of weev than i am of for example mike enoch. if weev did something disappointing, i would be a lot more disappointed.

i mean im kinda disappointed he’s hanging out with this white slut losers hahahahaha.

had 7 minute conversation with adjacent department colleague. he is way too smart to be in his current job, which is a job i would like to have. but he is a big ideas man who would be very well suited for grad skool IMHO and he is thinking about it and sort of on the fence…..but he is light years ahead of me as far as having a good plan and talking a great game and doing his research, and READING BOOKS, working on a business plan, looking at schools, looking at programs, plus he is more charismatic than me and has a GF who is planning on going to med skool.

full version, without the silly music, of anti-pornography interview by ted bundy MERE HOURS before he was executed, linked early in that MPC thread

nofap is kinda ridiculous, i think the much more important thing is NOPORN. porn is INHERENTLY destructive and horrible, a LOT more than jerking off is. of course when you pair the two, a lot of people get it confused. no you can still jerk off, just dont look at porn. ever. again.

http://mpcdot.com/forums/topic/8227-why-pornography-is-bad-for-you/page__st__100#entry191105

been reading this whole thread. pman has a great effortpoast here.

anyway yeah i talked to this guy who is nice and charming and very smart, he is somewhat like me in that he is currently “underachieving”, but he’s underachieving way less than me because at least he’s above bare minimum, he is well positioned to go to grad school, he has a gf, and seems well adjusted. i should try to hang out with him socially hahahahaha. and while i agree with him on several important points such as a radical reimagining of Education, the destruction of the modern university as we know it, meaningless Credentialism etc, i am SURE he is much more leftist than me, and seeks to make everyone equal, etc. also uhhh i don’t think this guy is technically hwyte hahahahahahahaha. but he is nice and smart and i feel favorably to him.

so is me not disclosing my views, is that disingenuous, or is that Good Tactical Taqqiya? especially since i cant really argue my views well with smart people.

this guy really is a really good drummer, really fun to listen to him rawkkkkkk the fook out on those drums. PLENTY of superfast blasts as well as the more med paced ones. great drum SOUND as well. well done lad.

not sure how much i love the overall production, but the drums sound great and the mellow parts, maybe the heavy guitar is a little fuzzy. a minor quibble.

just exploding with high energy, impossible to believe this is just one guy. but yeah his energetic drumming is the foundation of all that. the rocking bass playing probably helps too. not that bass has any place in black metal hahahahaha. this might be my moment where i finally Get Into Panopticon. shit i even like the phaggy nonmetal parts. none of it sounds insincere. hey maybe all the people saying panopticon was good were on to something.

yasssss ive KNOWN about them/him for a long time, 5 years at least hahahaha.

he does really like those fast blast beats. good for him. i think i would play in a similar style as him if i could actually play drums. i am aiming for the same target as him. the same drumming muse motivates us hahaha.

jan 27

see i like that he does the fast beats over (under?) very melodic, catchy riffs that could just as well work with somewhat slower beats, so you can still totally understand the riff, rather than for example nile who have fast blasts and fast, meaningless, incomprehensible riffs that sound like total wankery. fun, passionate, happy wankery but still wankery.

anyway. day off here. was very tired last night and fell asleep easily. the big surprise was the greatness of the sleep that followed. long, solid sleep, but also filled with interesting dreams which i will try to remember.

one sort of confidence shaking one involved me meeting with muh boss’s boss, who is pretty much an official higher-up, and kind of an intimidating, no nonsense, masculine man who wants to get things done. not very surprising given his professional role. but obv i want him to like me. so he was having a brutally honest talk with me about My Fit with the Organization, how I can see everyone around me has masters degrees and are consummate professionals, so what do I really think about that, heavy implication that i obv dont have a masters degree and am underachieving as fook, i am now an older man, WHY ARE YOU HERE, why arent you doing MORE, and WHAT ARE YOUR CAREER GOALS. that was a direct question. tell me right here and now what you are trying to do with your life, what are your career goals, prove to me that you are a good fit with this team, impress me with your specific career goals. and i was caught off guard and started rambling nonsense, a bad answer, and he saw it immediately because he is very perceptive, and quickly shut it down. ok ok ok i see where you stand, let’s end this meeting now and let you go back to your underachievement. with the heavy implication that i was now marked as the underachieving loser slacker who would never be considered for promotion.

now the reality is, i will never be “promoted” per se, the best that could happen, and I guess that IS muh immediate career goal, is to do such a good job here and now, that IF a better position opened up, I would be the top choice for it. that is, i won’t ever be promoted in this position, i would have to apply and interview for a totally new job. in the sense of req codes and job classifications and unions. all our jobs are kinda strictly defined which certainly is related to The Union.

anyway if he ever had that discussion in real life, and he wouldn’t, if anything it would be my direct manager, who is personality is more….gentle but he still gets a lot of stuff done. I would tell him, I love muh job but obviously want something more substantial, i would love to have more responsibility (hours, money) in this department, i want to be the top candidate here. i’ve been on the fence about masters degree for ever and i think i have legit reasons for that. but your opinion is important and if you push me in that direction, that would help get me off the fence. i just dont want to pay 50 grand for a useless masters degree. would basically be what i would say.

what else. i was a young man living in a house much like how i did at that time, with a ton of other young students. common theme in muh dreams. i was sitting and talking with an “older” woman who was the mother of this gurl I fancied who lived in the house too. this was a real gurl I did once fancy. there was also a young man there who was the gurls brother. i never RL met the mother or the brother. they were talking disparagingly of the woman, that she was a very shallow, judgmental, bitchy young woman, that she only liked you if she could use you, she only liked cool, good-looking people, and treated you like garbage if you weren’t, and this is a bad way to be, and she better change her attitude.

in the dream i was kinda friends with the woman and was thinking wow that’s a little harsh, dont talk about muh waifu like that hahaha. i hope she’s not really like that. but this is her FAMILY saying this about her!

funny enough, i never saw that woman in the dream. in real life, she was a very young, very qt gurl who i was sorta friends with for a while. but she WAS kinda bitchy like that, and also a bipolar, crazy, mudshark slut doing flighty things and prob very good at Ghosting people or throwing them away. she didnt really throw me away, we just kinda drifted apart and really werent that close to begin with.

later in the dream i met with other young women in the house, who were trying to suss out how i felt about that woman. who i liked every though everyone else didnt. i was talking to a Good Looking, Light Skinned Black Gurl who was kinda friendly to me and was possibly open to me banging her. I would much prefer to Bang the other woman and I wasn’t in luv with Race Mixing….but this Black gurl was miraculously good-looking enough to tempt me. believe me that never happens with blacks hahahaha.

i basically tried to very softly state to her that I thought she was good looking, but also that I thought the other (hwyte) gurl was good looking too. I made some great bullshit statement about being 1% attracted to somebody. wish i could remember it. i am a fan of the female form and appreciate all kinds and flavors of female beauty. a good looking gurl is a good looking gurl. certainly you, as a good looking gurl, can appreciate that, hahahahaha.

thats about it. no real lessons in that one, other than yeah i should have listened to other people and not pedestalized that woman, because she was clearly not a great person. and she wasnt! i would have totally dated her though.

she could have been a better person if she had seriously seen a shrink and just kept her legs closed and just made a damn effort to be a better person.  but she had big daddy issues of course. SAD.

i mean i dont think she was that bad of a person. she was just heavily compromised and broken and even if i did date her, i know she would have dumped me quickly and it would have been yugely disappointing. she was very disappointing. because she could have been much much better. fairly smart, great looking hwyte gurl. i blame the father for abandoning her. and the mother, im sure, was at least a little crazy herself. mother married a pretty stable man early in the gurls life but it appeared the damage had already been done. to the mothers credit, she did pretty well with that guy and built a seemingly stable family.

http://mpcdot.com/forums/topic/8227-why-pornography-is-bad-for-you/page__st__180#entry213001

great comment here by millennial former p0rn freak who realized the error of his ways. this yuge thread just gets better and better. prob should permalink it. ok done.

QUOTE

The young man becomes insatiable by 21. Now there isn’t even a hint of affection in the scenes he watches. Love, healthy emotion, and even pleasure itself are passe. ……On it spirals, the curious young id, into French curls of perversion and decadence. Whips. Chains. Anger. Raw frustration. Rage. Hate. Sex is now hate to him. Sex is just ugly, contemptible, shameful: a grim continent of disgusting Freudian urges. Why fight it? Keep going. Keep looking. Keep clicking. There’s salvation, there’s absolution out there somewhere.

Until one day the young man, alone in his onanistic filth and fluid, learns the master lesson of human sexuality. If he is wise, his heart and intuition will lead him there. That lesson is as follows: the sexual impulse is perverted if it is aimed at pleasure alone. There is no greater cause of human heartache than chasing pleasure for pleasure’s sake. All the sexual impulses must be directed toward some higher purpose: strengthening a marital bond or forming a family. Any other avenue of sexuality hijacks the awesome power of your libido and makes a slave out of you.

I quit porn. I quit any kind of sexual titillation not involving a real, living woman I love and with whom I wish to raise a family.

I only wish I’d been given this prime directive more forcefully as a child.

END QUOTE

big march for life today in DC, almost forgot about this. they should have this at LEAST twice a year, ideally every week or day. i think its a good opportunity for pro-hwytes to be visible and active. get richard spencer at this thing hahaha. they are incorporating Gays For Life, which is not the best way to go imho. well….i dunno. on the fence about that. if it can help overturn roe v wade, then it would be good. and then we could focus on turning down the gay degeneracy. IMHO i think abortion is the bigger problem. that commonplace, feminist-related, straight-WOMAN-related degeneracy is a more pressing issue than gay degeneracy.

so  i dont read enough books hahahaha. i did an impulse buy of this book. i was looking at bowling alone, which is somewhat of a classic. then remembered when i talked to my intelligent colleague yesterday, he mentioned bowling alone as well, and said putnam did another book on education. i THINK he was talking about “our kids.” that would prob be more up my alley right now. almost bought that one, then read some critical reviews saying “coming apart” was better, on a sim topic, and less PC. plus i had heard about “coming apart” ever since it came out and I have respected murray ever since the bell curve which i bought like 5 years ago hahahaha. also its PAYDAY so this is muh gift to myself. plus it talks about HWYTES directly in the title. ok i’ll bite.

also i look for books where you can get a used hardcover book for a decent price. got a 60/40 shot here, not in your favor.

ok big task for the day is go to store. aiming to do that at 6pm.

just wanted to say for all i talk about pr0n, im not really tempted to watch it, and im greatful for that. but it ULTIMATELY wouldnt matter if i were tempted every single day, as long as 1. i realized it was bad, 2. AND i resisted the temptation.  so i would stand in moral solidarity with the men that are really STRUGGLING there, fighting the good fight. i am no better than them. if anything this shows you the temptation is only temporary. this too shall pass.

tbh im MUCHHHHHHH more tempted with MJ. i think about it ALL THE TIME, several times a day. if i HAD any, i WOULD be indulging in it every day.

in a way, being a habitual porn user is WORSE than a woman being a dirty slut. because she STILL doesnt watch PORN.

think about it. the pathetic foreveralone atomized virgin with 31 tabs of weird porn. cant talk to gurls. sees secs as jooish narcissistic pleasure only. with no idea how to relate to other people. at least the slut has better social skills! the slut isnt shutting herself away from people and hasnt stunted her ability to deal socially with the opposite secs!

in fact, in dealing with REAL HUMAN SECS rather than the fake illusion of porn, the woman has MUCH more occasion to view sex as a human act. because it isnt such a SOLITARY pursuit for her. the human, two-person nature of secs is MUCH harder for the slut to deny, than for the pathetic neet constantly jerking off to videos, by himself, never experiencing that with another living person.

so its probably HARDER to become a slut than to become a porno addict neet hehehe. because to become hard to Actual Human Interaction like that and STILL DO IT indicates a VERY poor moral character. i think its easier to fall into porn than to fall into sluttery in other words. porn is a MORE slippery slope.  cuz its JUST YOU. only you and the weird, twisted world you’re creating, no one else there to help pull you back from that abyss.

its easier to associate secs with Human Bonding when you are having actual secs with an actual person, in other words. so yeah the women that CAN do that I think are even WORSE off than the most hardened pathetic porno neets.

and if you “gave” these porno neets a real woman, that might be like a harsh wake up call to the Human Element of secs, which might get them to quit porn. but porn obviously DRAINS your Social Capital and Charisma and makes it much less likely you could get a real woman to consent to secs with you. so i guess the best solution is to spend decent money to get an attractive hooker. because hookers are still humans hehehehe. unlike porn. not saying those gurls arent humans either, because they are. they are probably the most pathetic of all. but no way the hardened porn jerker is gonna udnerstand that.

its just such a bad shitty thing and i cant believe more normie men dont realize it. they might not become daily, 31 tab porn addicts, but they still beat off to it once a week and think its harmless, fun, hot, sexy. thats bad enough!!!!!! even if they still havent been harmed enough so that they can’t pull human women.

like guys who have a GF they have regular secs with but STILL watch porn. i GUARANTEE the porn will EVENTUALLY cause a problem. and with good reason, because it IS a real problem.

anyway im just thankful i am not tempted by it and i have not watched it in well over a year. like 15 months maybe.

wish i could just as easily not want to smoke MJ. i dont know how im gonna do that. with porn i simply stopped watching it. MJ i havent even smoked in like 4 months but still think about it every day.

heh why havent i looked for an MPC thread on MJ. theres gotta be one.

oh right. because they either dont have a SEARCH function, or, more likely, i am too low-rep to use it or even see it. doesnt make much sense tho. i mean the forum is largely open to read to the public, why not make it searchable. can google do it?

https://mpcdot.com/forums/topic/7920-marijuana-not-even-once/

ok you CAN use site:mpcdot.com to search the site at google.

https://mpcdot.com/forums/topic/287-critiques-of-legalization/

first one is prob more relevant.

anyway. i think i ALWAYS had an IDEA that porn was somehow wrong. gross and ugly and not realistic. but i used it ANYWAY. but i dont think my heart ever became completely closed. i was aware it might be hurting my behavior with real women, but i did it anyway.

i didnt think it was a huge problem, because i didnt spend hours looking at it at a time. i didnt have 31 tabs open. but maybe i had 10 tabs open! and i used it most days! even if it was just 10 minutes, go to a trusted source, and rub one out. that was bad enough. thank god i never got to the point where i had huge hours-long porn marathons, just looking and looking and looking.

but damn if i didnt still graduate to weirder and weirder stuff anyway!

and i think it did make me hate women, because i thought that those real-life sluts had reduced their real-life sex to something crude and disgusting just like this porno!

and now that i’m fully aware of exactly how disgusting and wrong porn is, i STILL think real life sluts treat their real-life sex like this, which makes me have extreme contempt for them…….but they probably DONT, so i SHOULDNT hate them so much. they probably STILL feel some human connection.

when i was looking at porn, i KNEW it was lacking the human connection, and that the human connection was something I really WANTED. but i did it anyway because i was horny. just wanted to see some naked young girls fooking and doing increasing weird stuff. but i still wanted a gf and a rel and cuddles and luv. i knew that the porn was at the very least WEIRD and not realistic, but i guess i accepted it as an imperfect Substitute. its actually a hell of a lot less harmless than that. i certainly didnt realize how harmful it was.

even NOW i believe it still affects the way i view women! thats probably the worst long term harm its done to me. i wish i could undo it. i am cautiously optimistic More Years without porn will help here. but point is, even a year plus cannot completely undo it. its LONG TERM shit.

like you see a woman inadvertantly show cleavage while leaning over, and you think Automatic Negative Thoughts like that dirty slut. sex means nothing to her. she fooks guys and throws them away, the sociopath. and that is almost certainly not true. you are looking at reality COMPLETELY WRONG. heh. that is humbling and hard to accept.

A person’s success in life can usually be measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations he or she is willing to have.

signature of “marketing guru” on MPC who has a pciture of tim ferriss for his pic hahaha. looks like tim ferriss is the originator of the quote too hahahaha. well he’s kinda a BELLEND but i kinda like some of the things ferris says, and this is one of them

i read part of 4 hour work week in 2012 and kinda wish i hadnt gotten rid of the book, i think i purged it as “jooish degeneracy” but he’s not really jooish. he is a very successful hwyte man who despite being kinda sleazy has said some powerful things hehehe. has lessons to teach.

QUOTE from pman: But what really sets them apart is that they struggle to relate to other people, which comes across clearly online and must be glaringly apparent in real life. What’s also apparent is that porn consumers operate with a strikingly high level of baseline depression, which they use porn (among other things, probably) to combat.

end quote hehehe. like i say, great thread, good reason ive permalinked it in the sidebar. i hope the MJ thread can help quell my urge to do MJ hehehe. which as ive said is a MUCH bigger threat atm than porn. ive pretty much solved muh pron problem thank god (although still feel the long term residual effects!!!!) but at least I dont WANT it the same way i’ve CONSTANTLY WANTED MJ.

https://mpcdot.com/forums/topic/7920-marijuana-not-even-once/

lets link this one again hehehe. dis gon B gud.gif. this might even graduate to the sidebar.

well it is pretty gud. i should read this every time i want to smoke MJ. ie, erra day hahaha. just wish it was 28 pages like the porn thread instead of only 4 pages.

http://takimag.com/article/has_pot_become_a_hard_drug_gavin_mcinnes

gavin mccuck writes for takis which is a halfway decent “gateway to the alt right” site. hes actually a decent writer even if he is a weak cuck married to an asian joo with little mixed kids. terrible. sad. but this article sees him smokin modern MJ and getting a panic attack. and basically he is becoming more anti-MJ now that he sees how STRONG the stuff is.

whats worrisome is i would get panic attacks and paranoia and STILLLLL want to smoke it!!!!!

yeah pretty good thread, needs to be longer tho. and uhhh i still wanna smoke MJ. god damn it hehehehe.

i actually took a pretty much full dose of nyquil at 7pm after coming back from the store, did my Goal for the day thank god. then had nyquil. then drank some coffee because i wanted to play cards for a little. actually did ok today. left with more than i came in with. 4 to 6. that does not happen most of the time hahaha.

about to go to bed now. this is why i took the nyquil, so i could sleep long time when i did go to bed. guess i could have just taken it now hahaha. 1030pm.

saor aura album. pretty sure i like saor better than panopticon but its nice to hear panopticon drumming for saor on this album because he’s such a good drummer and he brings his great style and sound to this album.

 

 

 

 

 

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WE’RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER OVEN

dec 6 2017

i met and talked to a solid, 100%, no doubt about it J today. No doubt about it. He walked in and immediately I saw the Kippah on his head and had to do a double take. almost got a double boner. are you fooking KIDDING me? i havent seen a J in YEARS, except for this guy who sailed past me riding a bike on the walk/bike trail last winter, who had a beard and little jewish strings dangling from his clothes.

but here was an actual living breathing J with a Kippa coming in as a customer! wow thats exciting. Also he had a very J name. he went by a “nickname” that sounded kinda goyish, and i was thinking, hmm that name doesnt sound very J’ish, then i looked him up in the system when he left and saw that his actual first name was pretty J’ish and unamerican hahahahaha.

but he was nice and friendly and great Verbal Intelligence. Polite and Nice and Friendly and not an asshole or a degenerate. And then I thought, do I want to put this NICE OLD MAN INTO AN OVEN?????

of course not, I don’t want to put this nice old man into a damn OVEN.

BUT i dont know him personally. maybe he beats his wife and molests children at the JCC. but he was meeting with two GOYIM, myself and my Senior SME hahaha, and he was clearly not treating him like CATTLE, or me for that matter. like he clearly trusted the opinion and smarts and judgment of my colleague, who is indeed very smart and capable and professional, and you SHOULD trust him.

we were basically helping the J’ish man with his laptop which seemed to be a cheap old thing, and he was not very computer savvy, although he has at least a masters degree in MATH. only smart people do MATH. also he wasnt super autistic or awkward. he had good social skills in other words. better than me hahahahaha.

so there is a photo of little J kids on the computer, he mentions he has 10+ grandchildren, and my first thought was not, oh shit, he’s MULTIPLIYING and WE’RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER OVEN, but oh, isnt that nice, he has a nice large family. be fruitful and multply.

the most jooish thing about his personality was that i could see him potentially being Pushy and Demanding and Difficult. But he was nice to us.

but yeah he LOOKED pretty J’ish, with beady little eyes and a Kippa and a beard. I honestly didn’t study his nose too closely. i guess it wasnt a huge jooish hooknose.  nose was about average i guess.

so if he’s wearing a Yarmulke, that means he’s an orthodox joo? so he’s RELIGIOUS. i mean better than being super Crypto. just come right out be like I am totally a Joo, and a religious joo at that. i think i prefer that to the alternative!

but because he was nice to me, i didnt want him to look at me and somehow detect that I am a YUGE anti-J hahahahaha and wanted to put him in an oven, that his people is my LEAST favorite race by far.

but i had no hatred or even dislike for him as an individual. in fact he seemed downright LIKABLE.

see this is what they call the Good J. of COURSE J’s here and there can be GOOD. Good People. but as a WHOLE, they’ve done more harm than good. if they were all like THIS guy, that would be great.

so i had to mention that, because i can’t remember the last time i Experienced an actual live J. I might have talked to a J on the phone in my previous job. maybe. I took like 2000 phone calls there, i’m sure i did.

so yeah. what do his children do? certainly all doctors and lawyers and engineers and successful rich J’s. they probably make more money than him because he chose to go into teaching. so that takes a pretty selfless kind decent person right? well except for the administrators and school board people hahahahaha.  and old school full time tenured union teachers hahaha.

i basically meet very interesting people every day. i really am quite blessed. but yeah i dont know how to MAKE THE MOST out of this.  and I’m nowhere near as interesting as these people.

another guy, white guy for sure hahahaha, came in today. he was full of 6000000000000000 stories and jokes and anecdotes and he was actually pretty funny and colorful, but yeah he was a talker. he had a damn Ed.S. degree too and possibly even a PhD. he talked about College Rivalries. I of course did not mention that my college frowned upon his college, because what the hell did i do with my life? he went on to build an interesting career, get a million degrees, have 3 kids, and now his daughter was going to the same pretty good uni he did, doing a Smart STEM degree and getting a scholarship to study abroad in a good STEM country, at 19/20 years of age. doing everything right in other words.

he himself, not sure what his undergrad degree was, but POSSIBLY computer science. not bad. he talked about how he had a decent internship that kept him busy. this was in the early 80s. i didnt realize internships were a thing. sheeeeit he probably actually got PAID for it. then after he graduated he immediately stayed on an extra year and got a masters. not sure if that was the EdS or something else.

so he was highly educated but he did not work at some big company. he started his own company doing ummmm financialish services, nothing super high status though, and also doing a lot of teaching on the side.

point is, he kept busy working like 60 hours a week for the past 30 years hahahaha and still does.

he was definitely a colorful personality, not an autist, not awkward, certainly had plenty of self confidence. was able to get married, have 3 children, at least one of whom is gonna be super successful. so he did well with his legacy.

so i looked him up and found a damn self published BOOK he wrote and i am reading that in another tab right now. its actually pretty good and paints a more sympathetic picture of him as a more humble, thankful, and god-fearing man, while in person he was potentially abrasive and obnoxious and arrogant and overbearing. not to me though. i could not keep up with his bantz tho, it was fast and furious. hot and heavy. these 55 year olds have more energy than me.

but yeah i like reading about peoples lives because i am too awkward to ask them these things. but this is the type of guy who will tell you story after story of his life unsolicited.

and of course i am insecure about the fact that i personally dont have any stories to tell.

no interesting good stories i mean. i can tell you pathetic, cloying, desperate, sad, boring stories hahahahahaha. but nothing funny or interesting or neat. just boring and sad.

he comes across as much sweeter in the book, its actually quite touching. candidly discussing his own struggles with his weight and his marriage and him praying to GOD for help and strength when interviewing for jobs. like sheeeeeeit this guy has the same fears and insecurities i do. but he has persevered and accomplished shit, whereas i have not.

he did not seem too Godly in person but this comes across a LOT more in his book.

and its just kind of neat to meet a person who breezes in and out in a whirlwind of sometimes inappropriate stories and jokes, then find their BOOK on google and read about their deepest fears and hopes hahahahaha. i wish i could do it with more people!

ive sort of done it with myself…..except its ANONYMOUS whereas he puts his real name on it. thats how i FOUND it.

and this guy came from a working class background, very prob the first in his family to go to college, and he made a pretty good go of it. his book immediately gets into the value of Work and being a Productive Useful person and asking GOD for help and strength. its really quite good and will give me something to talk about with him if I see him again, which I may. i guess he could think its creepy that I read his BOOK. but he probably wont. he will probably cherish the chance to talk about himself more hahahahahahahaha.

i can totally appreciate meeting new people and hearing their STORIES. everyones got stories. even i’ve got stories. it’s not a great one but its a story!

basically my whole story is one of a long, painful, lazy, low-energy struggle to become a damn ADULT and stop being a lazy negro bitch child aka a spoiled neet loser omega virgin hahahaha.

well i read the whole preview. I could probably ask the guy to just send me a PDF of the whole book. he also has another book on teaching and another book which is the biography of it must be this coach he knows and is written pretty reverently. the guy is not a bad writer.

hehehe maybe i should go to the J guy and be like oh i am so humbled by what your people went through at the hands of my people, i am SO SORRY for The Sins Of The Past hahahahahahha, you have taught us SO MUCH about Tolerance and Forgiveness and The Human Condition.

and he would say, oh thank you for recognizing the struggles and tragedy of my people, you didnt do anything wrong, but we must be ever vigilant against racism and bigotry so something like ANUDDA SHOAH never happens again.

ORRRRRRR I could approach him and be like, hey schlomo, we’re having a sale on WAGNER hahahahahaha. WAGNER.  wink wink nudge nudge.

ORRRRRR i could be like, see this huge swastika on muh chest. you know what that means hymie. YOUR KIND IS NOT WELCOME HERE. NOT WELCOME.

or i could be like, listen schlomo, im on to you. im a bad goyim. the man that you fear. i know about boas. i know about…..kaganovich. and the holodomor. i know about the uss liberty. and jonathan pollard. 911 was an inside job. culture of critique is muh bible. i have a signed photograph kmac. and Uncle Adolf. I know the words to the horst wessel lied. I watch triumph of the will and chill every day. i am your worst nightmare bubbie. i know what you did to my lord and savior. i know what you write about him in your talmud. and the blessed virgin mary. youve been kicked out of 109 countries in the past 2000 years and you keep saying the problem isnt you. well i got news for you schlomo. its not us, its you. so you got a couple of good J’s like muh teacher buddy. well if more of you were like him, you wouldnt have to fook off back to your homeland. he will be on muh short list of J’s who are allowed to visit. not live. visit. so why am i so hateful? because you turned my men into phaggot negros and sissies, and muh women into negro whores, and muh country into a shitty sewer only the trvmpenfuhrer can save, thank GOD for him. and you killed christ, ya god damn christkillers. and you flooded murderous muslim savages into muh homeland. and you ruined education. you poison everything you put your hands on. its not even funny. everything is a disgusting perversion with you people. and you caused world war 1 and 2 and god knows what else with your goddamn rothschilds. and the federal reserve. and the media. good god. i cant even. i am literally shaking right now. hahahahahahaha.

education. so i guess vouchers and charter schools are bad, and public skools are good. that is what i am supposed to believe, as a Professional Educator. well really i believe that the current state of things for new teachers is horrible, and they should pay them more and hire more teachers rather than paying a 30 year old permanent sub 14 bucks an hour to babysit a room full of 40 screaming negros and then paying a RentACop 9 bucks an hour to physically restrain the physical ones, while paying 55 year old retirees a pension of 100k a year hahahaaha. hire some more young teachers. hire some moar rentacops. put half the students in Military 4 Kids. that would be a better use of Taxpayer Money. send juvenile delinquents to the military. give them gunz and tell them to protect the border. give them some cheating military slutz and a booze ration. sterilize the coloreds and give them 10 grand worth of purple drank in return.

heh. i could go for some purpa drank. assuming its just straight codeine hahahaha.

friday night. sleep in tomorrow. ideal day for some you know what. MJ. not even purpa drank. MJ would be just fine.

took me 2 minutes to find the home address of the J guy hahaha. not even TRYING folks. but he lives in a super J area of town where old skool J’s live or used to live before they moved further out to SuperBourge Upper Middle Class and lost their religion hahahaha. area with a lot of old school jooish senior housing, torah skools, yeshivas, yahudas, whatever. his daughter marrying a ultra orthodox joo from israel hehehehe.

all these names R’ Moishe Shekelstein. So I guess R’ means rabbi or rav? whats a “rav”? is this guy not only a succcessful education professional, but a RABBI as well? was i just face to face with a damn orthodox jooish RABBI today? I think i was hahahahahaha. can you believe it.

https://guardyoureyes.com/index.php

heh i am spending too much time on the jooish internet again. this site has resources to keep religious jooish men from looking at naughty sites and pictures. you can even get a “kosher phone.”

http://forward.com/news/358939/neo-nazis-set-date-for-armed-march-against-jews-in-montana/

heh. i was looking up this j00ish school, brought me to the infamous j00ish mag the forward, where the top article was on andrew anglins upcoming march in whitefish. AWESOME. THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN. I will give him ANOTHER 6.16 just for this hahahaha. WELL DONE LAD.

heh my new j00ish rabbi friend probably reads j00ish news like this and is probably only of the only people i could conceivably meet in real life who has therefore heard of richard spencer hahahahahaha. i should ask him if i see him again. hey ever heard of this goy spencer?

http://therightstuff.biz/2017/01/01/how-to-waifu/

oh dear god why dont i ever read the TRS regular site hehehehe

http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/can-a-prostitute-ever-become-a-faithful-wife/74782

hehehehe

best 2 sites on the internet

jeezum crow. millennial woes possibly doxed. seventh son possibly doxed. this is INSANE. bulbasaur was definitely doxed. i thought i knew MW’s normie first name but i never told anyone of course. i saw seventh son’s sunglass wearing face once in a video that was quickly removed from youtube. but my god. give these good men your money.

https://www.salon.com/2015/12/22/white_men_must_be_stopped_the_very_future_of_the_planet_depends_on_it_partner/

most antiwhite article ever hehehe yes ive seen it before, its not new

well…….nothing official about MW so far. no names, no dox. wewlad. but rumor that he was approached by the lugenpress recently and may need to get out of UK. god damn. send him some money.

and PROBABLY seventh son will be all right.

but i have seen the official bulbasaur dox where they blatantly mention names and faces and towns. yeah but it doesnt PROVE its HIM.

but yeah major people getting doxed is a big deal. its tragic but it might Strengthen the movement. like if it fires people up to donate 14880000000000 dollars to MW and get 1488000000000 white men marching with him and throwing nonwhites out of the UK. it’s still not WORTH doing though. youre essentially MVRDERING a human being out of hostile aggression.

HONEYMOON PERIOD IS NOT AN UNREASONABLE EXPECTATION

jan 2 new current year 2017

not sure how alt right this is….ok fairly alt right.

https://web.archive.org/web/20161023161647/http://derekthewolf.com/how-to-make-women-happy-again-by-embracing-nationalism/

only using archive because i dont want to leave a trackback, but i do support the theme of the author, seems like a good goy.

article found on emily youcis retweet

//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

just trying to embed a darn tweet hahaha

he has good thoughts, just doesnt name the J as the driving force behind cultural marxism

GEEEE I WONDER WHO COULD BE BEHIND THIS.

 

//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js

hmmm not embedding the way i thought it would. anyway she was getting like 2500 shekels a month, like honest bigboy money, and then

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C1GWJOuXEAAjH6H.jpg:large

no room on jootreon for hate speech, youve violated community guidelines, your page has been removed. nothing about the 2500 dollars. at least one goy was already charged for his 200 dollar a month donation hahahahaha must be nice what does HE do for a living. anyway they better give her the final donations, unban her, or refund the money to the donators. how jooish would it be if patreon KEPT the 2500 dollars?

who made this decision? I WANT TO SPEAK TO A SUPERVISOR hahahaha. and being denied 2500 dollars (and more in the future!) is VERY good reason to speak to a Decision Maker, with a Name!!!!!!

Millennial Woes, YOURE NEXT!!!!!!

dont get me wrong, none of this is surprising in the least, i just thought it was ridic cuz it happened so quickly. i didnt even know who EY was until november. in december i decided hey what the heck, donate tiny amount to her monthly on patreon. january 2017 comes around, eager to see her get my first one feckin dolla dnation, and she is SHUT DOWN on jan 1.

was watching dr phil my fav show, and they had a 38 yo hwyte man who DIDNT WANT TO WORK. he lived with his 91 year old grandfather and made a little money selling car parts and fixing up engines. his sister was furious for his mooching and took him onto dr phil. unfort he did not seem very sympathetic. i missed the first half. i dont know how he helps his elderly grandfather or contributes or tries to offset the mooching.

basically my litmus test for My Alt Right is, how are you on the JQ. That is it. The Final Red Pill. The JQ really is Crossing the Rubicon. and there is no turning back. separates the men from the boys. just as you get a JDar, you get a JQDar to pick up on JPilled people are on the JQ. they either get it or dont get it yet. pretty sure I am one of the privileged few who do get it. of course some people are more “extreme” than me. or at least can argue better and give you more better faster Truthbombs, and would want representing your side in a debate. I am so not that guy hahahahaha. you do NOT want me representing anything in debate unfortunately. wish i were better at that shit but i just freeze up and feel stupid. let the J’s and the marxists walk all over me. does not feel good, man.

so now emily youcis knows my real normie name hahahaha. hope she understands I do NOT want to be doxed in the same way she has been.

i mean people, esp women, don’t understand that its rude to do Spoilers. Maybe they wont understand its more than rude to do Doxing….the ultimate Spoiler hahahahaha. whoops sorry for doxing you, i wasnt thinking.

hehehehe. no im not really worried tho.

greg johnson had a good article recently on the severe violation of doxing

http://www.counter-currents.com/2016/12/dealing-with-doxers/

how can people NOT understand this. how naive can you be. why be a shit stirrer. how can you be a so called WN and NOT understand that using a fake name is NOT cowardly or jooish…..ITS BECAUSE YOU DONT WANT YOUR LIFE PERMANENTLY RUINED, AND THATS A REASONABLE THING FOR ANYBODY.

This is exactly the type of thing a crazy person like sinead would not udnerstand. not that she is doxing WN people. kinda surprised she hasnt!!!!! no, she just shit talks them.

maybe even she instinctively understands that doxing someone is a BRIDGE TOO FAR.

but the comments in the greg article mention a certain CY woman who had a WN radio show back in the pre-alt-right days and she was a “shit stirrer” who called people cowards for not using their real names. i do remember her a little , she had some good content, but yeah i remember her being salty and mean and nasty and shit stirring and nasty to other pro-hwyte people! kinda like sinead. i can’t speak to specific evidence of her attempting to dox people.

women dont even KNOW HOW NOT TO dress like sluts anymore. so if you see a woman dressed like slut, that doesn’t mean she’s a slut. it just means the culture is so degenerate, she doesnt know how NOT to dress like a slut hahahahaha. in regards to super tight pants in public places.

this is just THE NEW NORMAL.

of course, she may well BE a slut hahahaha.

no more than 7 dicks by age 25. assume start taking dicks at age 18, then one per year.

i mean i would PREFER one dick for every TWO years, but you gotta COMPROMISE goy, you cant be so RIGID and JUDGMENTAL. COMPROMISE is the basis of all relationshits.

hey im willing to compromise baby. but lets just agree to agree that

HONEYMOON PERIOD IS NOT AN UNREASONABLE EXPECTATION

to restate the big point from last poast hahaha.

bitcoin still rising. 1027 nao. this is just ridiculous.

sweating guy meme.jpg

gonna take some nyquil or benedryl EARLY today, like no later than 2pm, so i can get in bed by 8pm, have great sleep to get up tomorrow at 515 am and go back to New Job!

my challenge is talking to normies and seeming normie when i have no normie interests. i dont watch tv or movies anymore. those are great ways to talk to normies. its all alt right, JQ, WN, 14 words, neet cure for me. nothing i do is normie. maybe i should go back to the gym cuz that is pretty normie. i can lie and say i’ve been going to the gym. i was going to the gym very regularly so its not a yuge bigly lie.

uhhh cant talk about MJ on the job, but with some normies, yes.

can talk about general current events. ok good. thats another big normie thing. see im not so hopeless and tismal and neet.

pretend i still like movies. talk about muh fav movies.

can talk about drinking pleb tier coffee like folgers and maxwell house, columbian hahahahaha.

using mint to track your personal finances.

playing poker is a pretty normie thing I do actually. i mean bitcoin gambling poker is very weird, but they dont need to know that part!

i do like some tv shows like king of the hill and sometimes bobs burgers and sometimes this cucky neoconnish tim allen show…last man standing.

kinda suprised bjork sold out her song to candy crush saga. she always struck me as a TRVE ARTIST. i mean i dont really CARE. shes a talented hwyte hwoman who deserves to make money for her children. but she’s a degen. her husbando matthew barney is an even bigger degenerate, despite being a handsome montana born big goy. bjork fooked at least one black guy in the 90s. she might fook more black guys now that she is divorced from barney. she prob made more money than him, i mean he was even artsier than her. so why does she need to sell her music nao? well even joo leonard cohen was outjooed by his jooish manager who basically stole all of cohen’s well-deserved money. so cohen had to go “back to work” and i’m glad he did because it gave me the chance to see him live which was a great life moment.

never saw bjork live. id maybe pay 30 dollars to see her in a med sized theatre, good seats. not gonna happen. she could play a nice med theatre, but tickets would prob be expensive AF. really i just wanted her to go in the “gling-glo” direction which wasnt even a technical bjork album, but it was an awesome album.

YOURE WELCOME.

yeah bjork is a degen antiwhite feminist who might as well be a J hahahahahahaha. but she’s NOT. she will never be able to STOP being a hwyte woman.

her mother was a marxist activist and her father was a “union leader”. aka a marxist activist. yep. not much of a chance for the poor young girl not to become a commie weirdo hahahaha.

so sad when hwhytes become marxist communist activists.

so gab is the freeze peach (aka hate speech, bigoted, racism) alternative to twitter. there is a WN Facebook which is not taking off. there is LiberaPay which is supposedly a free speech version of patreon or paypal. but problem is, i’m sure all of these would have a problem with WN and JQ and pro hywte advocates. liberapay shut down andrew anglin, as has twitter and paypal. does it pass the anglin test hahahaha. even TRS (enoch) still has a twitter.

took nyquil, 90% dose, at about 1:30 pm. went for 2.6 mile powerwalk. came in, warmed up, and now at peak of nyquil hahahaha. you want to get the PEAK out of the way well BEFORE you go to bed, so the next day you arent super groggy. so thats my goal.

also in the entirety of 2016 i Bought No MJ. 2015 I sure did hehehehe.

i havent bought or been able to procure MJ in……..over 17 months. yet i am still obsessed with it. well, i did partake in some 4 months ago.

obviously i should look for a FREEZE PEACH version of wordpress because they could EASILY shut me down. terrible.

WHICH REMINDS ME, better back up this blog…..ok done.  export xml file of whole blog.

what about hwyte people who have lived in diverse, violent ghettos…..and are STILL antiracist, say shit like yeah I’ve lived in violent white ghettos and anyone who says you should be “racially redpilled” if you live around violent nonwhites, is full of shit. i lived around violent nonwhites all my life and I KNOW they weren’t violent becuase they were nonwhite, they were violent because there was no opportunity in life except for crime!

these people do exist.i have met them haha hahahaha. well not a shitload of them. i would guess MOST white antiwhites have never lived in the black or brown ghetto. BUT SOME HAVE. dont underestimate them. dont overestimate them either. i guess these would be the worst, because they are THAT willing to cling to delusions, even over their own physical safety, or their family’s. sacrifice your white children to prove that black violence is caused by white racism. the ultimate in virtue signalling.

not similar to my situation except for  was probably “making” her miserable hahahaha because i wanted her and she though this was disgusting.

hahahahah reddit is so non judgmental that they never suggest that a 17 yo gurl being POLY is ridiculous bullshit. i mean any woman being “POLY” is ridiculous , but it seems like clear bullshit when a 17 year old Self Identifies as Poly. Usually they need several solid years of being a cheating whore and College to even learn about Poly and rationalize it as a legitimate thing.

look at him making a damn sandwich out of it. I reap the benefits of her disgusting whore past in SPADES because that means she is really good at secs! but……i still feel creeped out by it. becuase im a horrible person to think you shouldnt fook 60 guys. even by age 35. oh sorry 31.

this guy could be trolling….but for what purpose? to what end? i dont think the gf is wrong at all. porn is gross and bad and you shouldnt like it. well she needs to take MORE of a moral stand against it and also recognize its JQ origins hahahahaha.

what hopefully emily y and women in the alt right realize is, there is a shitload of young men out there who want to get married and have real relships, and we are sick of being crapped on by women, women who want to have their cake and eat it too, who break mens hearts because the women just want to have casual rels, not serious ones. well, there are TONS of men in their twenties – YOUNG men, who want SERIOUS wife type relships. while women in their twenties only want casual relships. then when these women turn 30 and want a husband, they cant get one. because all the good men want to get married when they are in their 20s. and good women realize that. and they get married in their 20s as well. GOOD PEOPLE MARRY YOUNG.

but yeah dont be surprised when men dont want to marry single women in their 30s. 20s, yes. 30s, not so much. women USED to be ready for marriage at a younger age.

it may be getting to the point where the culture DOES change. where 25 year old women do want to get married and not be sluts. good thing i’ll be too old to benefit from that shift hahahaha. the joos literally stole muh YOUTH from me hehehehe.

when i was young all the women wanted to be degens. by the time the culture changes and women want to be nondegen, i will be old as shit. how can a 45 year old man Woo a 25 year old woman?

well, its not entirely UNHEARD OF. plus, if the young women become more nondegen, they might well become open to Creepily Older Men. Benefitting me, hahahahahaha.

somebody needs to go to r9k or /incel HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA actually its not that funny hehehehe.

yep nyquil at 1:30 pm, was nyquil tired a bit after that, planning to go lay down for bed at 8pm, is 742 nao, getting closer

 

WOMEN HAVE NO MORAL COMPASS AND ARE WIRED TO HATE OMEGA MEN

wed aug 9

so people used to drink like 1% alcohol beer because it was cleaner than water, the alcohol killed all the germs and viruses and bacteria and shit in the water, so it was actually safer to drink beer than water. and you stayed hydrated by drinking weak beer instead of water.

could you dump dirty water into beer and then the smallest amount of alcohol would kill all germs? i dont think it worked that way. like, you couldnt ADD shit. you could MAKE really watery beer and then THAT water would be ok.

whenever i read shit on /relships, im like, why are you even asking? just dump them. just dump them.

then i realize its because they actually CARE, they dont WANT to dump them, they want to save this relship, they are WILLING to MAKE AN EFFORT, they dont WANT to LOSE this person.

and it is painful when a person just wants to be DONE with you. they want to be done with you SO MUCH that they are ok with never talking to you or seeing you ever again. you might as well have DIED.

at least send your mom, or your BFF, or your new BF, or a Social Work Student, to be a messenger of the bad news and to say SORRY, I KNOW THIS SUCKS FOR YOU. or you can just send an email or text yourself which says that. sorry, i know this sucks for you, i dont mean to cause you this pain, but i cant do this anymore, i have to back out, sorry, the end.

how hard is it to send a TEXT saying THAT? it takes LESS THAN ONE MINUTE. to throw away a person without even taking LESS THAN ONE MINUTE to say something to them is just ridiculous hahaha. i would NEVER do it to anyone.

now i am on the outs with people but its completely different situation. like for an incorrigible addict who has been given countless chances by everyone in their life. that’s not what was happening with me and that woman. i felt i wasnt even being given ONE chance to Air The Grievances. Festivus hahahaahahaha.

i AGREE that at some point you can talk about it TOO MUCH and talking about it any more wont do you any good, you just need to END it.

i’m not sure when that point is. probably when one person is sick of TALKING about it and the other person is obviously not listening AT ALL. I think this is probably more than three times. use the old three strikes rule of thumb.

so yeah i dont feel i got three strikes. never even TALKED about it ONCE. SO THERE.

eyebrows. never understood the manicuring of eyebrows on women. i have about average eyebrows and i would be perfectly happy with a woman who had the exact same eyebrows as me. well i have one eyebrow hair that grows extremely long. not sure how that happened but i just trim that one single hair like every 3 months and that is good enough. basically i prefer a natural look to an artificial look, and everything women do to make themselves up looks so artificial to me! women of a certain age are NATURALLY beautiful! why do they want to fook it up by making it look ARTIFICIAL?

for a similar reason I don’t like makeup, lipstick, eye shadow, eyelash mascara, any of that shit. no thank you. YOU LOOK LIKE A HOOKER.

maybe the TINIEST bit of makeup to show that she is making an effort for you, her man, not to seduce a room full of rich men. of course she doesnt need to make an effort in the looks department, but showing the WILLINGNESS to DO SOMETHING for you shows loyalty and luv and good faith. the more you know. rather than someone who ignores you, avoids you, and takes you for granted. doesnt really luv you. wants to be done with you but is too craven to tell you in ANY way.

hire a damn Process Server hahahahahaha.  YOU GOT SERVED.

no i didnt hahahahaha. i would have preferred getting SERVED.

aaaaannnnnd bitcoin continues to go up. OH WELL. I DONT HAVE ANY MORE TO SELL.

I resent women because (and this is certainly not the ONLY reason) is because I would be SUCH a GOOD woman. I could be a better woman than most women. Men know what Men want. Men know how to be a better woman. Women have no idea what women want, or how to be a better man, so their opinions are stupid and worthless. men’s opinions are wise, meaningful, correct, and important. Men speak the truth, women speak bullshit.

but this is the way its ALWAYS been! dont hate a cat for being a cat! dont hate a dog for being a dog!

yeah but dogs and cats arent supposed to mate together!

but im just saying its always been CONCEALED and COVERT with women, they NEVER knew what REALLY goes on inside their body or minds, so why expect them to be “honest” about it? they can’t possibly BE honest!

i guess I just value HONESTY that much. and men DO.

i guess i’m just mad that men value honesty so much and women are naturally dishonest, incapable of honesty. if i didnt care about honesty so much, i wouldnt care about women being deceptive.

heh. well, what do women hate about men? they hate weak, needy, clingy men. and there are plenty of weak, clingy, needy men out there. i’ve been one myself.

i dunno. i just feel being weak, clingy, and needy is not as morally wrong as being DISHONEST. a cheater, scammer, liar, abandoner.

because im using mens morality not womens morality hahahahaha. for a MAN, YES it is pretty bad to be weak. or dishonest. for a WOMAN, for a MAN to be weak is the worst thing ever, and for a woman to be dishonest doesnt really matter. women get to get away with being CHILDREN.

i guess i also resent that too: men have to be RESPONSIBLE, women DONT. COME ON.

if i have to be responsible, i want muh women to be responsible too.

i struggle bigly with being responsible, but i know being responsible is the right thing to do.

whitesville west virgina, think i will move there hahahahahaha.

there were yellow flags and red flags with that woman, for example some silly stuff she believed…..but EVERY woman believes some silly stuff and has some yellow flags in that way. just be grateful she hasnt been with 60000 guys red flag. besides you can probably mold her towards less silly beliefs and make her a white warrioress bearing you many little white warriors. what could be better. and then when that woman leaves you like a ghost, you are devastated for at LEAST 2 years. it all makes sense.

hey. i KNOW i was important to her for a WHILE. like she genuinely liked me as a person, liked seeing me, liked spending time with me, i could TELL she wasnt FAKING it. so i guess i just wanted her to SHOW ANY of that at the end. like i’m sorry, i know this HURTS, sorry, i dont mean to throw you away like a piece of garbage because thats NOW how I think of you. you really DID mean something important to me, i just couldnt Do Those Feelings.

that’s all i was looking for hahaha. dont be SO goddamn destructive. try to apply a little soothing balm as you rain down fire and napalm and nukes. make any effort to at least do that.

dont let a woman name your children, they end up picking a STUPIDASS name like brooklyn or something. no. brooklyn is the name of a city, not a person. be a man and name your child something traditional and good like michael or mary or anne or elizabeth or john or james or richard or donald or adolf hahahahahaha. it’s not complicated. it’s not difficult.

how can you give birth to children but not know how to name them hahahaha. how can you give birth to children but also murder them and be horrible at raising them? why can’t men just get pregnant. they would probably do it better than women. we dont need women at all. women are a net loss hahahaha. just use women as brood mares, locked away from productive male society.  they grow children, give birth, and absolultely nothing else.

so what do you do with girls. you cant ABORT them because ABORTION IS MURDER.

yeah but women just arent WORTH as much as men hahahaha. they are LITERALLY inferior. their lives don’t MATTER as much hahahahahahaha.

no i am jk of course. but you see the slippery slope.

but really i mean come on. these women. they gotta start adding value. not just coasting on this being the bearers of children bullshit hahahahaha. actually be a worthwhile PERSON hahahaha.

JEALOUSY IS NATURAL AND NORMAL. Women will never understand this. they think jealousy is always bad and means they should dump you and that youre abusive and a horrible person and you should work to get rid of all jealous.

NO. JEALOUSY is a GOOD thing, because it WARNS you of BAD things: that the mother of your children is CHEATING on you.

Now, some people might be Overly Paranoid, and that’s not good, but if your GF is spending lots of time with her Male Friends, then YES you SHOULD get jealous! instead the women bitch about their jealous bf and then end up dumping him and getting with their male friends. because their ex bf had no good reason to be jealous then hahahahahaha.

i want terribly to sm0ke mj, but i dont want to be around st0ners, hang out with these degen idiots. i just want a big bag of mj all to myself, so that i can get blazed alone, in peace. no people around. that woman would have been the exception. i liked being around her, she didnt like being around me at the end. i was desperate to hang out with her and sm0ke mj with her, had a FANTASY of hanging out with her, smoking mj, cuddling, making out, her being nice and sweet to me, etc.

but i am also happy just sm0king weed by myself, other people make me nervous. just be by myself and listen to music or maybe exercise or something.

meh i dont care if emily youcis is a huge race traitor wh0re, she has done enough and put herself far enough out there that it pretty much cancels any past degeneracy. she has made real sacrifices and done real penance. she wouldnt do what she’s doing now if she wanted to go back to fooking blacks. she has woken up and changed. god for her.

i have no proof that she was fooking LOTS of blacks, but i assume that as an artsy, punk, drinking, MJ smoking, urban young gurl, singing in a punk band dressed like a hooker, foul mouth, yeah i mean i’m not NAIVE hahahahahaha.  she CLEARLY has a PAST.

but thru Becoming Who You Are, you can be Redeemed from any sin! its really kinda like accepting Christ as your personal saviour! but probably even better! with a lower Recidivism rate is what I’m saying. meaning lots of sluts will turn to Jeebus but still be gold digging, treacherous sluts at heart. maybe eventually destroy their beta cuck husband. but when a woman goes 1488 like this…..it would be really hard for her to turn back after that. i mean i guess sinead could, but she has no credibility anyway. a newcomer like emily youcis has more credibility that sinead, who has done nothing but attack good people. its very disappointing. she could have done a lot of good.

richard spencer is trying to hire one person for 12.5k a year hahahahaha. that’s about as much as Im making right now. and he wants this guy andrew joyce who probably is a good writer and has a graduate degree hahahahaha.

my point is, i simply couldnt just waltz in and get a 20k Alt Right Job, because there ARE no Alt Right Jobs! The one alt right job there is pays 12k a year and wants qualifications i dont have!

again, you would LITERALLY be a LOT better off taking calls in a tech support call center.  good god.

anyway i think it would be better if someone like emily said yeah i fooked negroes in the past, i am disgusted with this and would never do it again, rather than sinead avoiding talking about it, when she gets accused of being a mudshark all the time, and she probably was, but just wont address the issue. just say you did it, say you’re ashamed, say you understand your mistake, learned from it, and became a better person! we will forgive you! were not monsters!

not that theres been any mudslinging on emily. the alt right has been very gentlemanly to her and she hasnt done any sketchy shit either.

well she was just on the david duke show today, which is a good show, i just dont listen to it super often hahahaha. but he just had richard spencer on a few days ago, and he has andrew anglin on regularly. i have been down with david duke for YEARS. i dont like the plastic surgeries and the rumors of degeneracy, but the stuff he says is so solid, and I was glad he ran for senate, and is talking to the right people. keeps in touch with the young kids in the alt right. WN 2.0 hahahahaha.

i have listened to at least 20 episodes of his radio show hahaha and listened to at least 60% of the audiobook of “my awakening”, can heartily recommend. great book. great info on the JQ which I got in 2012 or 2013. Duke has been around for DECADES, before there WAS an alt right, and the best thing out there was mgtow. yikes. dark days. then you found stormfront and said, hmmm i think these guys are onto something, but theres gotta be a better way of doing this. this guy david duke is pretty solid, why arent there more people developing this line of thought? and now there ARE.

heh. i am an oldfag, back when i was getting into shit, MGTOW and MRA was the EDGIEST shit the internet had to offer. besides stormfront hahahaha. and i read a little bit of stormfront too.

but yeah boy am i glad the alt right happened, MGTOW was a damn dead end.

dec 29

so yeah. while I USED to identify as a MGTOW, i did have serious problems with it as I accepted my pretty natural desire to have a Wife and Children, to have a traditional monogamous white relship. pretty quickly i realized how jooish and unnatural it was for men and women to be at war with each other, to be enemies. this wasnt all womens fault. there was a more insidious force at work.

the family life was shitloads better than the mgtow single life. i couldnt believe how so many mgtows could not figure this out and were still either talking about how to bang sluts, or how to build robot women.

tarek and christina split. i bet it was her that is At Fault. To Blame. I never liked her hahahaha. i liked him a lot better even though he is half arab. plus he doesnt look or act semitic at all.  and their chidren were adorable. i bet she dumped him and he begged her to stay and make an effort to work it out baybeeeeee and now she is fooking new guys, probably WAYYYYY more nonwhite looking and acting than tarek.

right after he had that Cancer Scare! What a Horrible Bitch! but he seems too nice and she probably needs a man who can absolutely DOMINATE, if not abuse her. she would be more down for a more dominant arab man. tarek RESPECTS women too much. many women dont want to be RESPECTED hehehehe. then they go on reddit and tell women everything is abuse, loveisrespect.org. nope. you respect a woman, she will leave you for pedestalizing her. OR do something so horrible and disgusting to teach you a lesson about Pedestalizing. Take me off the pedestal! I’m gonna fook 10000000 negros right now!

going to buy new glasses. it is the biggest jooish ripoff since going to the dentist. going to the doctor hahahaha. go into these glasses places and they are full of Shark Women doing sleazy salesmen shit. absolutely disgusting. women shouldn’t be doing this. shit men shouldnt be doing this. no business should be run like an obvious jooish scam. capitalism doesn’t have to be so jooish and disgusting ahahahaha. purge the bergs and steins hahahaha.

americas best is the WORST. if it says 2 pairs of glasses for 70 bucks……..sheeeeeit. don’t tell me that 2 pairs of glasses for me is going to be 210 bucks. that is THREE TIMES MOAR. if someone comes in asking about the 2 for 70, do you really think they have a huge budget to buy the top shelf glasses and lenses? and us rubes don’t know that frames and lenses are two different things. 2 frames for 70 is bullshit when its like 140 for two sets of LENSES.

i would ask them, what are you looking to spend, 100 dollars, ok, well for that you can get this, for a teensy bit more you can get this, then you prob wont want to go much hgiher than that!

no frills, no add ons, no extras, no upselling, just bottom shelf, bargain basement, basic bitch everything.

2 pairs of glasses, out the door, with lenses, for 70 bucks. that is what i want. i don’t care about polycarbonate, or scratch protection (well, sorta i do), or antiglare coating, or transition lenses hehehehe. maybe if i had vision insurance, which only the top 1% do hahahahaha. or people like muh baby boomer family hehehe.

i thought getting a glasses shop job would be pretty chill, but after going to a few of these places, i can see that it would not be. on dec 29 the places were packed with people. maybe thats just normal for the holidays.

bitcoin falling finally.

GENTLY signalled interest in the MJ with the one person i can conceivably talk to about this. i thought he might have not registered the idea that next time he wants to go in, i’d like him to tell me so i can go in with him. he is generally good at reading signals but i still wasnt sure, besides, i am terrible at communicating stuff like this. and he is abstaining for the medium term for very legit reasons. but yeah yesterday i made it clear that when you decide to stop abstaining, please let me know ASAP. he clearly understood what I was saying. so that is good. Now I know not to be PUSHY.

in other words, ive done all i could there.

but yeah i was like damn how could i ever do what these women do. lie to people to sell them glasses. they deliberately make shit confusing and complicated to Upsell and Add On Shit, and have horribly misleading advertising. i hate this jooish shit and i hate that white women are stuck working in these jobs. i’d be like listen, you want the lowest price, i get it, well then you have to get this. i SHOULD HAVE studied the website for americas best before walking in there, just so i could tell them the things i DIDNT want.

well i ended up finding a pair for 70 dollars, including both frames AND lenses. that seemed reasonable to me. so just said ok ill take it. wanted to get out of there anyway. fookin glasses. the place was huge, had a ton of employees, and a ton of customers, and i thought, really, glasses? such big business? doesnt everybody have lasik or contacts?

i dont like honestly not terribly smart white women acting like jooish snake oil salesman. youre obviously tyring to confuse me with glasses jargon. dont do that. i should have taken 5 minutes to study glasses jargon before i left. but i shouldnt HAVE to in a nice huhwhyte country is what im saying. i guess i didnt realize the glasses industry was so thoroghly jood. i shouldnt be surprised though. health care, hospitals, doctors, dentists, medical, insurance, its all fooked and jooed. which is sad.

and when MJ is legal that will be jood too hahahaha.

tensions with israel at the moment. UN snubbing israel and obama/kerry saying yeah we snub israel too. trvmp saying just you wait bibi, just 3 more weeks and then me, your best buddy, me, will be in office, and you wont get this terrible treatment from the US. this was always gonna be the black pill about trvmp, was his super friendliness to israel, i guess we were just gonna not think about it until it was time to think about it. which is now nigh.

i mean i guess i support a state for joos as long as they get the damn joos out of the US. out of our media and culture and govt and business and education and everything. absolutely never gonna happen.

square pegs. mid 80s teen sitcom with teenage sarah jessica parker. she was a QT when she was young, fook this horse face nonsense! but it just never suits a woman to be a 40+ year old slut, so she brought that shame on herself!

i think she is jooish. doesnt stop 20 year old jooish gurls from being qt.

yeah i believe in REDEMPTION. and if i believe in redemption for myself, which i would LIKE to, then i have to believe in redemption for other people. namely, women, sluts, degenerates. if i can do it, they can do it. if they can do it, i can do it. and i like reading stories of actual redemption.

i dont think sinead is stupid. in fact i think she is attractive and its tech good she has a baby. she sometimes comes VERY CLOSE to making good points, and then totally crashes and burns, or attacks somebody great like millennial woes. so she is very frustrating and disappointing, because she has great potential. and of course she could be redeemed too. but my god she HATES the alt right. she views it as a totally gay compromised thing. calls it the alt k1k3.  i guess i should be happy that in 2016 there are qt white women who are ok on the JQ and not afraid to use the K word hahahaha. didnt have this even 4 years ago.

but yeah if kyle is her lover she should identify as his wife, and be like, im taken by my one man kyle, and he is the father of my baby. i luv him and will be loyal to him. and not have any ambivalence there.

so in short i dont trust her at all. i trust emily Y more than her.

wow what an insensitive cvnt. and she wants sympathy from reddit. i hope they crucify her hahaha. if she worked halg the day that her husbando worked, she’d be EXHAUSTED too. but now she wants to dump him because his job is exhausting him and she is annoyed by him being exhausted all the time. what a fooking bitch. he needs a woman who can have s ome damn sympathy for him.

basically with /relships, i upvote men and downvote women. and men who talk like women. women have nothing smart or good to say about relships. they have no idea how to have relships with men.

i think if i went into americas best and said listen. i see your sign for 2 for 69.95. that’s basically the type of value i want. I want the SHITTIES lenses AND the shittiest, cheapest frames, for less than 100 bucks TOTAL, out the DOOR. frames AND lenses, under 100 TOTAL. no deals, no add ons, no extras, no 2 pairs. no scratch protection, no anything protection, i am looking for the equivalent of no-fault shitty auto insurance. i would like to buy nicer glasses but i cant afford them.

reddit is gonna say there is nothing wrong with the sister being in JOOISH PORN and the man needs to GROW UP and GET OVER IT.

now i dont think you should be quick to pull the DEFOO trigger, and always be open to forgive and allow your family the chance to repent and redeem themselves…..but the sister is not moving in that direction at ALL, in fact, she is doubling down on the PORN. so the brother is RIGHT to be DEVASTATED and depressed about this. shit what if his WIFE decided this was an ok thing to do?

i was watching andy griffith and gomer pyle USMC and i was like, these quaint shows of a better time. that gomer pyle is a likable idiot. seeing that this stuff is STILL made by joos when you watch the crrrrrredits.

or this show “Square pegs”, which i had never heard of, but seemed pretty entertaining and well-written and funny. yep moar joos. which is not surprsing as this was the 80s. but joos in the 80s and esp the 60s didnt seem so god damn JOOISH as they do now. well except for that sneaky sneaky joo norman lear. i mean i used to watch all in the family regularly, and like the character archie bunker. i still kinda do!!!!

but yeah being JQ aware really helps you with shit like that. and reading between the lines to see this is more than just a good show. its more of a subversive and offensive show than you realize. you’re not SUPPOSED to……well i cant even say that youre not supposed to like archie. he’s the main damn character. i think you ARE supposed to like him, and realize YOU are just as horrible of a racist goy as he is, and then learn Lessons Of Tolerance just as Archie does. but archie truly says some hilarious shit. him and his wife edith are both great. and shitlib son in law meathead. total shitlib sjw leftist commie.

i WISH the show were written by alt right SHITLORDS rather than SJW Joos! honestly the alt right could bring the show back in this way, that’s a great idea. would be even kooler than a blatantly alt right king of the hill.

on the fatherland, muh boy no1 suggests that million dollar extreme/sam hyde is basically Entertainment/Comedy for Goys By Goys, comedy stripped of any horrible jooish influence. i mean i hope it is! we need our own CULTURE, stuff like music, movies, tv, stories. not just implicitly cool stuff like christopher nolan or something, but something that comes right out and says, this is who we are. we are not J’s. this work is 100% free from jooish influence. i would love that. cuz you can’t GET that in mainstream ANYTHING.

this is another benefit of black metal hahaha. it is very free of jooish influence. maybe thats why i like it so much hahahaha. was such a big boortzum fan for so long hahaha. really liking this saor/fuath hahahaha.

well because its impossible to make a tv show or movie without a bunch of Js getting involved. I like more solitary pursuits, more of a Auteur approach hahahaha. one man’s singular, unadulterated, unjood vision. much more practical to accomplish with music or books. and i dont like books hahahaha. well auteur movies are a good attempt too.

and certainly self made youtube vids. or 1488 podcasts hahaha.

havent really watched lots of MDE. dont know anythign about the other guys in MDE other than sam hyde. i guess there is an mde book now. i mean i respect and trust no1 so his recommendation is as good as any.

george feels responded to me and said thank you. so that was nice. have no idea if he is gonna fix the thing that i said he might want to fix hehehehe. well i did my part. i might give him another dnation next xmas hahahahaha.

when i get to the position he’s in….wait a minute i am actually OLDER than him hahahaha. AND he has a better job than me.  so when HE gets to the point I am in now, THEN he should start going to hookers and smokin MJ which is freely available in his damn town. just walk into the store just as easily as buying a bottle of booze. and he Gets To Do That too. I’m not even allowed to drink booze any more hahahahaha.

this is kinda sad. of course i would say take the “dream job.”

He has very low self-esteem and has mentioned several times that he may be depressed. Until recently, he would rant to me over text (hundreds of texts) about his insecurities, that he feels like trash, and that there’s a lot of expectations and societal pressures on him because he’s a man. Multiple times he’s told me he wanted to end his life. When I tried comforting him and dissuading him from it, it backfired and he lashed out against me, saying that there is no way I can empathize with people like him in the slightest. In subsequent meltdowns, I held back on comforting him out of not knowing what to say, and he said I lacked a moral compass and that women like me are biologically wired to hate men like him.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. well i know how this guy feelz, but the fact that she HASNT left him yet, CARES enough to ask reddit. but yeah. ive felt that exact feel. women HATE loser men more than men hate sluts. and they will throw you away like garbage. thing is, she hasn’t thrown HIM away like garbage, and i think if she DID dump him, she would make an effort to do it in a decent way.

yep you will be a virgin for the next 10 years, just be thankful you can even GET a job. also try not to get arrested for drugs or alcohol hahahaha

oh thats fine, nothing wrong with fooking 12 guys by the age of 18 hahahahaha.  sex is a conditional, relative, gray area thing. sometimes its serious, and sometimes its just casual fun!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!

BE ASHAMED OF YOUR SLUT PAST. tell your bf yes im ashamed of what i did and who i was, and that shame is gonna keep me from doing that shit again. yes it is digusting i agree. instead when you tell him im not ashamed at all, whats wrong with that? uhhh yeah youre saying i have no shame about being a shameful slut hahahahaha.

because who knows when they are gonna get bored with sex with YOU and go easily find it with any of their 6000000000000000 male friends.

they SHOULD be ashamed of their slut past. that is the BEST way to make your new bf OK with your slut past. NOT say, no, i’m not ashamed of that gross degen disgusting shit I did!

you SHOULD be ashamed of disgusting things you did! not continue to unrepentantly insist these things ARENT disgusting! damn!

what ELSE is she not ashamed by but SHOULD be? cheating?

best to be with somebody who shares your sexual MORALITY – that sex is not some Fun Game to be played with any Sexy Boi. of course its hard finding a woman with that sexual morality! and if you do, they will not like you back and will reject you VERY HARSHLY hahahaha.

sheeeeeit you know what, she was EMOTIONALLY CHEATING on her original boifran. she wanted to fix things with him, but she was EMOTIONALLY CHEATING on him anyway. by becoming friends with ME. yeah i didnt realize this at the time, and not until recently, and its safe to say she NEVER realized it! because she was emotionally retarded!!!

 

THE NEET CURE

dec 26 2016

welp the wholesome part of the holidays is over, now everyone is just gonna get drunk and fook like negros until they have to go back to Work on January 2 hahahahahahah.  and those are the lucky privileged people. More people will just continue to work as they do every other day. maybe struggle with drug and alcohol problems so they can keep their shitty jobs which make them work during the busiest time of the holidays, serving shitty customers. its enough to make a person want to abuse drugs and alcohol!

i think california getting legal MJ is a big deal, i mean its kinda surprising they didnt have it until now. maybe they needed smaller states like CO, WA, and OR to act as a pilot program before CA really threw open the gates.

i mean its possibly a bad thing, leading to an even more degenerate society. but one day it will make it 600000000000000000000 times easier for ME to obtain it. me me me me me. fook the greater good.

i think it should be legal, but SHAMED. i said earlier this might be impossible, but is it really? look at cigarettes and tobacco for example. those have been shamed pretty well. or have they? has that really worked in getting people to choose to buy/smoke less cigarettes? probably a little bit, and thats all that matters.

should you tax the shit out of MJ then? well, in that it might be an incentive for govt to legalize it, yes, but I have no faith that the tax money would be used for ANYTHING good. it would ALL be wasted on bullshit. i understand that. im just looking at the tax as purely an incentive for The Gummint to Legalize It.

and against i dont see this as some big crusade for justice, because it is a mixed bag. i’m not sure it…..well it probably SHOULD be legalized, but shamed as fook. shamed even more than cigarettes. which are currently more shamed than alcohol or porn.

but you can still get tobacco EVERYWHERE, and you have plenty of tobacco shops which themselves are not sleazy. well not all of them hahahaha.

i guess i would also take, instead of full legalization, then the state expanding its Qualifying Conditions for MMJ to Despair or Anxiety, hehehehe.

there already IS a NEET CURE, it’s called the MILITARY, thats ALWAYS been the NEET CURE. but I think this aspect has been played down in the past 20 years, and the military is pretending like they are moar selective, and they dont necessarily WANT neet losers. but they will prob take neet losers. provided you’re not too fat and provided you never took psych meds like prozac or paxil or citalopram hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

george michael, dead of “heart failure.” well thanks that explains a lot hahahahahaha. i could have told you that. i guess thats better than cancer tho! but was it heart failure from, for EXAMPLE, mixing coke and pills and booze and painkillers and heroin and meth? that will cause heart failure for sure hahahaha. probably some MJ in there too hahahaha.

just waiting for another 20 bucks of bitcoin to transfer into coinbase so i could hopefully sell it at 901. because i have to move everything back and forth from coinbase, because they are jooish and watch exactly where you send your money, meaning no gambling and i would assume no Darknet Markets hahahahahahahahahaha. they scolded me for sending it to gambling. i have NO IDEA how they found out. considering I thought the gambling site used separate wallets for each gambler!

over 1 hour and 0 confirmations. didn’t even modify the fee.  this is why bitcoin will never take off. good idea though. just need something with FAST confirmations and ideally some way to send messages with the money. like hey guy this money is from UFMLL. remember me because i’d like you to know i donate money to you every 3 months. i am a true blue cobber m8. you can count on me. im not some kind of hypergamous mercenary who’s gonna leave you in the lurch. i am a MAN OF HONOR(tm) (great phrase from Chapin book MGHOW). wihtout having you have to make notes and search weird addresses jsut to try to identify somebody, and what if it changes your address every time? or you having to send a email before you send every transaction is probably the easiest way to identify yourself. still not very practical IMHO.

you know i am very optimistic about our young kids with 1488 blood pumping thru their veins. they dont even have the DESIRE to take MJ. I feel the desire EVERY DAY. I know it’s wrong but I think I can GET AWAY with it. I think the rules dont apply to me. I think I can just keep it in the closet and be an exception. but really I am envious of those who dont even WANT it. i wish I didn’t WANT it. but shit do I ever.

went for 1.4 mile powerwalk, not bad.

so anyway, i should NOT become an outspoken activist for the legalization of MJ, because its degenerative for huhwhyte society.

ok so whats the best military route for white neets? i honestly cant say. some say we want our white warriors on the frontlines. i would say study something hard and technical where only white men pass the exam, and get yourself into a safe all white male unit doing technical shit.

heh havent been to this horrible site in a while but this guy was dumped, was just devastated. people give him decent advice that WHY never helps, never gives closure. but its also very hard not to ask why. because youre willing to do anything to fix it, to make them change their mind. but they just wont. that never works. just let them go. fook yes its hard as SHIT. will make you want to sm0ke MJ for the next 2 years hahahaha.

hehehehe

why dont any gurls want a second date with me? im not a racist hater, i don’t like that racist trump! i dont have any wrongthink! why arent women interested in me at all?

yet the same gurls who are rejecting him are probably getting fooked by ebil trump voting racists hahahaha.

dec 27

heh. now i remember why i stopped reading /relships. because it is a woman-dominated space, and these women are annoying and stupid af. but they think they are SO smart, about relships, about men and women, but they know nothing. about men, abotu women, OR about relships. that is why they are high number crazy carousel riding catladies who cant keep a man hahahahaha. so how do they make 60k a year at their high powered careers then? AND have time to read and poast on reddit?

but yeah obviously this guy needs to Explicitly Ask for a Second Date on Saturday at 7pm and he would have more success. getting a second date at least hahahahaha.

but i mean yeah a bitch being texting on her phone the whole time during your date implies they are not interested. i mean its rude. but they just dont KNOW any better. at age 25 they dont know this is rude. and you’re THIRSTY and DESPERATE enough that you still WANT a second date with a RUDE woman who texts and sexts during the whole first date and is too stupid to even KNOW that’s rude.

ARrrrrgh this makes no sense! Who can I ask for clarification here? who’s the SME for this Subject Area?………..you mean I’M THE SME? IM THE EXPERT? BBBBBUT I have no idea how this works! I need an SME to help ME! I can assure you, I am absolutely no EXPERT in this! I know MUCH less than the USERS!!!!!!! why can’t we appoint one of them an sme?

welp, you better learn it fast, because it looks like you are the SME.

i can’t believe this is how things actually really work with large, successful businesses.

well, my business was in a Failure Phase tho. and if they dont pull out of it, they will end up selling the company.

you can sell a publicly traded company btw. prob need to cash out all the stock though. or maybe you can get out of that with bankruptcy. leave your stockholders in the lurch hehehehe. who knows. im no JQ bankruptcy attorney. though you can make good money in that career.

but it takes a certain TYPE to be a LAWYER. there are a few good huhwhyte lawyers like toilet law and this other guy. but i bet they are in the minority.

benedryl sleep last night, had dream featuring 2 female friends i had in muh crazy uni days. i was with one female friend reviewing a video of myself and the second female friend, and i was like, wow, its plain as day, look at her body language, she clearly wants the D, but its so weird I didn’t notice that at the moment, and had to see a video playback. hmmm. maybe I SHOULD give her the D. interesting idea.  I mean its really not a HORRIBLE idea. yeah i’m hung up on this other gurl, but some casual fook buddy secs might be good. and if its not, at least we can say we tried. lets give it a try.

and of course this never happened in real life. IRL I WAS too hung up on this “angel” i was in luv with, that I didnt’ even want anyone else, and I was even making female friends at the time who were arguably attractive women (21, 22 year old women! I should think so!!!!!) but I honestly had no interest in them in that way. but maybe i should have pushed myself towards being Casual Fook Buddy with at least one of them hahahahaha. how would that have played out? I will never know.

but this dream got me thinking. maybe that could have worked. me, doing a degen casual secs, fook buddy, FWB thing. whoda thunk it.

but yeah i put these other luv interests on such a pedestal, that i couldnt even THINK of other women.

i guess it was similar when i first met That Woman. I was still heartbroken over women2012 and couldnt even THINK of being with another woman.

And its ok to feel that way hahahahahahah. my feelings were valid. i don’t really REGRET not trying to bang that female friend hahahaha.

its so weird looking back on it. she was not just a leftist, but a leftist activist, and she was kinda a SLUT, she had told me about times she “HOOKED UP” with guys drunk at a party, i think she even said she had fooked a BLACK guy, and I knew she was a “little bit” crazy, (in hindsight I think very likely bipolar), but i also accepted her for who she was, and didn’t really judge her too harshly. we got along well and never really any tension. i kind of felt PITY for her having these meaningless relships. she was “dating” this guy tho and it was a CLUSTERFOOK. she wasnt happy and he wasnt happy and I just couldnt tell WHAT was going on. i still dont know.

anyway she went on to be a successful lawyer (hahahahahaha) and somewhere in there found a decent man, but I dont think that lasted, and she had some legit family tragedy, and I think went crazy and possibly had a breakdown, and did a complete career change and is doing pretty good with that. much better career than me hahahaha.  i mean she was always ambitious and a hard worker. is not gonna get lazy and slothful and despairing and neetish. but its the bipolar which will be a real risk for her. anyway i wish her well, she’s not a bad person.

so interesting. i can know a lot of shady details about a womans shady past and NOT be judgmental, say she’s NOT a bad person. when you would THINK I would judge her SAVAGELY. NOPE. it’s DIFFERENT when I actually know a person in real life. i give them the benefit of the doubt.

but yeah i was never in luv with her. but several people wondered if we had something going on. we did not hahaha. i was not really interested. but in hindsight, she was not unattractive, and it probably would have been good to try to get some Experience with her. while of course Respecting her decision if she didn’t want to hahahahaha. but she used to get REALLY ridiculous when drinking, even moreso than me. I would just fall down drunk. she would actively do crazy shit. including probably fook guys. black guys hahahahahahaha.

i actually met her father! he seemed like a good guy, was very successful, good father daughter relship, but pretty sure he was bipolar too. which became a problem for the whole family.  but yeah i think this is better than the alternative of an abusive or deadbeat father. he was successful and his children were successful even if his marriage failed.

but just making the point that she didnt become a crazy slut because she had a terrible father.  i think her father was pretty GOOD…..he was just legit CRAZY. she was too. but they both managed it pretty well. until they didnt. well, she’s doing allright. but he isn’t. it’s SAD!!!!!!!!!

so yeah. good people can be totally sidelined by Mental Illness. I totally believe it. I get it. I understand.

so yeah i wish her well, hopeyouredoingwell.wav, and that she safeguards herself against the bipolar condition. imho getting out of LAW was a good move. she can find other Careers to make Good Money. everyone I went to Uni with seems to have no problem makign good money! with me being the lone exception of course hahahaha.

selling the last of my bitcoin. huge. rally. to the moon. very bullish. sold at 890 yesterday, sell the last of muh btc at like 930ish today. and if it goes higher, OH WELL, im all tapped out.

ok sold it. done. no more bitcoin left. except 1 dollar in a btcjam account from deadbeats slowing paying me back on microloans. us citizens are now barred from loaning any more. oh well. it wasnt a great system for me anyway hahahaha. good riddance.

hehehhehehe this is starting right now. i would have shit my pants over this a few years ago. its a good move for roosh to move towards more serious men like uncle bern.  but both seem naive for just not reading the writing on the wall already. JQ. Race. WN. move past MGTOW shit. find a traditional woman. roosh go back to persia and stop ruining white women.

hehehe roosh really looks like a mudslim isis terrorist with that huge beard. i guess im glad he got TIRED of banging white sluts and realized there was more to life than MUH DICK.

with my superior white mind, i came to that conclusion and didnt even have to bang ANY white sluts!

and yeah i kinda envy him for having success with my race’s women where I have had NONE. literally. all the women i have had any success with have been nonwhite joos hahahahahahahahaha.  even white trash fatherless sluts reject me in favor of blacks and criminal toughguys.

well good riddance, i will go be a mgtow and get a damn realdoll HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA jk.

heh maybe bernard will become a WN in a few years. everybody moves at their own pace hehehehe. you cant really RUSH people.

ideally roosh would just marry a persian woman, have persian children, and repent for his past degeneracy, and encourage Racial, Noncivic Nationalism. encourage all his white male fans to become WN’s. Roosh is not a dumb guy. and he is gradually moving in the right direction.

but there are so many white omegas out there who can only think about women women women women women women women. i used to be one of them hahahahahaha. i STILL think about women ALL THE DAMN TIME. but now i keep Sex in its proper perspective – subordinate to RACE. whereas these mens movement people would disagree with that totally. and say race doesnt matter nearly as much as sex.

yeah sex does matter a lot. but race matters more.

just dump him and replace him with a better man! that is the answer to all womens relship problems. we men mean NOTHING to women. they are the REAL haters hahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. women hate men WAYYYYYYYYYYYY more than men hate women. women MEAN a lot to men. Men mean NOTHING to women. hahahahahaha. ok thats an example of the type of thoughts i don’t want to have, and ideally would refute them with a convincing rebuttal.

Have you ever had Anal Sex with a man you knew for less than 2 weeks? less than 1 week? how many men?

in the questions to ask your prospective wife hahahahaha. ideally you should not know these men less than a year. buttsecs is a BIG DEAL and should not be given out willy nilly. yet these beautiful white 22 year old gurls are quickly becoming ANAL WHORES!!!!!! BUTT SLUTS!!!!!!!!

would you want your DAUGHTER becoming that?

or do you just not care, all you care about is muh dick and muh drugs and muh alcohol? like a negro!!!!!!

just call them white n199er5.wav hahahahahaha

yet my female friend from 11+ years ago did all sorts of DISGUSTING things, and I dont hate her for it!

i wasnt in luv with her though!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

could I have been? maybe. anythings possible. but i knew all those unsavory things about her already, learned them pretty quickly, whereas That Woman didnt have any of those Disqualifiers.

and i STILL trust that That Woman wasnt HIDING anything. she was a trustworthy person. which made losing her very hard! and she still is trustworthy! she was and is a decent, valuable, good person! its really hard to lose that! it’s a lot easier to lose a total piece of shit!

anyway.  its all over. its finished. RIP.

but yeah. i am thankful for the few female friends i have had, i continue to learn from them 11 years later hahahaha. so yeah i hope that woman is doing well. that she finds a good man. although she would be hard to deal with. i dont think i’d want to. heck its possible she became a lesbian hahaha. but i dont think so.  but yeah she did disgusting things and i dont think any less of her as a person.

but yeah i didnt want to Be With Her and make babies with her and make her my waifu. at all hahahaha. whatsoever. i would have laughed at the thought. there was not that kind of Romantic Luv. I guess it could have developed. but now we are talking hypotheticals.

i mean what if she werent dating that guy? what if she was more “gf-ish” and sweet to me?  i mean she was nice to me but in that just one of the guys sort of way. and since i wasnt looking for any more from her, i didnt mind at all.

but yeah, bottom line, she was a good person and deserves good things and good people, but she was a little bipolar, but that shouldnt count against her. she could still be a good white wife and mother (and i hope she does!), provided she didnt screw it up.

she was weird though. she might not even WANT kids. she strikes me as possibly being one of those Weird Women that just has no desire to have children.

anyway my final word on her is that she is a good person and i hope she is doing well.

looked at hookers on backpage. technically that is not the same as looking at pron. i found at least two white hookers that caught my interest. 90% of the women were disgusting blaq hookers hehehehehe. not that the white ones are not white trash, but my god, i cant even imagine the type of man who would PAY these blaq women in the pictures, i mean they often looked fat and horrible.

funny that the majority of the white hookers BLATANTLY said no black men. so they are race aware and have a preference against black men, where Regular White Nonhooker Women do NOT! they are equal opportunity Cvm Bvckets!

well, as hookers, these women see the absolutely shadiest men right? so they probably saw tons of shady ghetto thug black men, not  talented tenth black men hahahaha. and arent the WHITE men they see shadier than the average white man? what kind of man uses hookers anyway?

Basically every man I know has been to a strip club. no big deal there. I heard of one guy who got drunk once and somehow a stripper offered to Suck His D for a price and he said ok sure i’ll pay 80 bucks for that! i dont think he found that all too horrible but it also wasnt the type of thing he did normally.

when i was in Uni a hedonist, sensualist acquaintance of mine talked about banging a hooker in amsterdam. this guy was a free luv kinda hippie type and very handsome, didn’t really NEED to bang hookers. i think he was just a sex freak and just honestly wanted to bang a hooker because it WASNT a normal nonhooker.

I heard about a middle aged alcoholic who would occasionally bang hookers. this kinda made the most sense. he was like 50 something, didnt want to waste time chatting with women, he had money from a business he miraculously ran, and he spent his money on booze and hookers. fantastic. TERRIFIC hahahaha.

i’ve known men who regularly go to strip clubs and it is PATHETIC. I have no desire to go to a strip club ever again. I would MUCH rather just hire a hooker for 30 minutes. strip clubs are just disgusting jooish places.

and yeah obviously i would rather be In A Rel with That Woman than ever go to a hooker. Still not over her! it will take about 2 years. but i am closer than i’ve ever been to getting over her. really all it will take now is meeting The Next Woman. I need to MEET WOMEN. and if that means going on fookin ok cupid, then thats what i have to do.

yep that FUATH – I album is really good. very listenable. dont even CARE if its a drum machine. album of the month hahahaha. dec 2016.

also looked on craigslist and backpage for “420” or “medical cannabis” or that type of thing. found some stuff, looked shady and or they blatantly said, you gotta have your card. which i’m sure they HAVE To say!!!!!!!

https://twitter.com/belledejour_uk/with_replies?lang=en

oh god heres a terrible woman. “sex worker” who got a phd in biology or some shit and is horribly sex positive and some of the trs goys are bullying her. GOOD! she is a monster. and jooish hahahahaha. OF COURSHE.

these women with phds in casual sex. fooking like negros. that is literally what their phd is in. then they make 600000000000000 tweets a day about how good casual sex is. ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING.

 

PLEASE SCAM ME

dec 25 2016

merry xmassssssssssssss

hehehe i like this brand new tradition i just started where i give xmas donations to decent people. paypal or bitcoin. gave donaations today to fatherland podcast, counter-currents aka grindr greggy, NPI aka richard spencer, daily stormer aka andre, smaller dnation to good morning huhwhyte america with adam and mary. i only listened to 1 episode but i know they are great people, adam appeared several times on fatherland, and GMWA is a beautiful family-oriented husbando and waifu pro-white podcast, which is comfy AF and just good stuff. also very pro-christ hahahaha.

also gave small dnation to GEORGE FEELS and hope he reads my message talking about using small amounts of medical MJ to help with his despair, doing a skype talk one day, using myfitnesspal to count calories and lose weight, and to look moar into the alt-right. really should have given him moar than 5 dollars, but hey he works 30 hours a week hahahahahaha. more than i do!!!!!!

have now dnated 190 dollars to alt-right causes in my life hahahaha. 45 dollars was in bitcoin hahahaha.

heres the message i sent to GEORGE FEELS:

Merry Christmas George! Just found your channel this year and I can relate. Don’t listen to the haters in your comments! But I would respectfully recommend 2 things: 1. do an in-depth experimentation with the legal MJ in your state and make a series of videos fully describing your experience. I suspect that MJ, at the right dosage, can alleviate despair somewhat. 2. MyFitnessPal is a GREAT tool for measuring calories in one’s diet and exercise. It helped me lose a ton of weight fairly quickly. The main thing was that I was simply eating WAY more than I really needed! See the actual numbers helped me discipline my raging appetite haha. You should also check out more Alt-Right stuff like The Right Stuff forums, great positive group of people that can help you feel good about your legacy as a Huhwhyte Man. One day I would ideally like to have a Skype talk with you, but maybe in 2018 haha. Maybe think about recording skype talks with other like minded people. (NOT the hecklers in your comments!!!!) Take care and next time you feel like sipping the Fermented Joo, please try a SMALL dose of The Herbal Joo instead, hahaha. Best wishes to you and your family! Also, are there any young fresh off the boat Ukrainian girls arriving in your area? You could potentially show them around, hahahaha. Take care buddy.

hehehehe. arent I SO NICE???!?!?!?!

I wouldnt send him any money if he were not HUHWHYTE.

There’s a chance he could be a JQ because a lot of JQ’s came from Da Ukraine, I’ve met some IRL. But pretty sure he said something about his family being somewhat christian. of COURSHE j’s can convert to christian, and i don’t like that, but…..gonna give him the benefit of the doubt. i guess there’s a chance he might have uzbek or kyrgyz in him. also gonna give him benefit of doubt. he looks more than 50% huhwhyte. despite the brown hair and brown eyes hahahaha. if he reveals he is not huhwhyte, i will not give him anything next year hahahaha.

if he is 25% jooish and 75% huhwhyte, i would also give him the benefit of the doubt. i am remarkably generous towards quadroons who choose to identify with their huhwhyte side.

played some poker on xmas eve and had a remarkably good day. doubled from 4 to 8 basically after 3 or 4 good hands. PRAISE GOD.

hahahaha i had the first and so far only xmas day dnation to andre anglin hehehehe YOURE WELCOME. he cashed it out within 30 minutes. which is smart, considering the VOLATILITY of btc, and that its own a downswing right now. ENJOY your 6.16 USD goy hahahaha. buy fookin 6 shitburgers on christs bday. how cheap and JQ am I?????!?!?!?!?!?!?

and not many people are dnating to good morning white america at all.

that feel when you are watching the travel channel and you see a jooish gurl you used to go to jooniversity with, and now she is a phd scientist commenting as an expert for TV shows hahahahaha. then you look the tv clip and confirm it is actually the person. she is about your age. well it doesnt say PHD after her name, but she is probably a PHD hahahahahahaha.

well i didnt really hate the gurl. she was a little autistic and weird and jooish, and i knew her because she was dating an acquaintance of mine who was super weird and super autistic and rather jooish hahahaha. this was like 11 years ago. yeah she looks older of course, but it still looked so much like this woman, i had to do some internet research. confirmed it is indeed her. well good for her, i never really hated her. well, other than i was suspect that she didnt give my jooish male acquaintance a fair enough chance. he could not have been easy to date though, he was confirmed super autistic. and they dated for pretty much a long time.

see, i used to be friendly and social with Literal Joos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and i would give them both a pass to get out of the oven hahahaha. i wouldnt have a problem with them going to israhell tho hahahahaha.

not gonna donate any money to THEM, they are jooish professionals making like 60 grand a year each hahahaha. at least.

but yeah they werent individually wrecking nations and genociding whites and promoting degeneracy. they were pretty neurotic joos tho!

where do you get off being a BLUE EYED JOO? I just dont get or like that. I mean this gurl was not an ugly ratfaced joo. now i’m wondering, was she even really a joo? I thought she WAS, but yeah, nonugly, blue eyes, you start to wonder. maybe only half JQ?

she wasnt a horrible person though. i would spare her the oven. and him. i liked him better hahahahaha.

just an unexpected thing to see on tv on christmas while watching travel channel with the fam.

i actually sent an EMAIL to george feels because after d’nating to him, I had a concern that concerns him. not going to talk about it here, but we’ll see if he emails me back. used muh new alt right email hahahaha. maybe he will be too intimidated. i tried not to be too intimidating, overwhleming, or pushy, or overbearing.

super JQ tv station vice showed terminator 1 last night, which is a great movie, and my god was linda hamilton not bad looking when she was 24 years old. horry sheet. unfort she shows her bare bosoms like a jooish wh0re. but its a very white knighting sentimental true luv secs scene. i still dont think they should have made her show her milkers though. show true luvsecs without any nudity. other than that the movie is good and not very jooish at all. but yeah my god was she a qt in 1984. in the healthy non-woman-hating man, this will kindle a natural white knight urge. in the mgtow woman-hater, it will kindle nothing, it will make you say, fook you, i’m not gonna white knight for some damn skank, thats how they GET you.  hahahahahahaha. hell no im not gonna fall for this TEMPTRESS’S TRICKS!!!!!!!!

rather you identify with kyle reese and say yes i am going to protect this woman. i mean thats what you SHOULD do.

not resist your NATURAL urge to white knight because bitches be bitches taking advantage of this urge to get gibs! which they DO….but not all women hahahahahahahahahaha.

hmm. i mean if women were damn crafty parasites looking to scam as much gibs as possible…..they would be approaching me and trying to scam ME, thinking, what can i use this poor neet omega virgin for? but that literally NEVER happens!!!!!!!

maybe im just not good enough to even be scammed hahahahahahahahaha.  i mean ….

well i DO have resources that can be scammed!

PLEASE SCAM ME!!!!!!

hhehehehehehehe

i guess im not considered the LOW HANGING FRUIT because i am invisible and im literally NOT advertising that i have a lot of resources to easily scam. like, they’d actually have to WORK to scam me. and yeah, they WOULD. I mean I actually VET people. EXTREME VETTING. I vetted HER too. and she passed the vetting! I still wont retroactively flunk her there! because what she did was simple cowardice, not really a 180 of character, even though it FELT like it at the time, because it was SOOOOO painful.

like they say, never attribute to malice what can be explained by ignorance. or cowardice. or laziness. she was ignorant and lazy and especially cowardly, but i really dont think she was EVIL.

not gonna donate any money to HER though hahahahaha. she doesnt do anything to strengthen our huhwhyte race hehehehehe. refuses to have anything to do with me.

they say you are over someone when you just don’t care if they are with someone else. well i guess im not there yet but i guess i am kinda close. i mean i dont want to know that she is with someone else! i just dont want to hear about her EVER AGAIN.

well yeah in a way i always care. because im like b1tch, you coulda been WITH ME. damn. i just dont want to hear ANYTHING about them EVER again, unless they want to be with me.

hmm hope paypal didnt shut down my account because im not using my real name. using my alt right name, just opened this account a few weeks ago, to start sending donations under a fake name. tried to send one to TRS and it wouldnt let. either me or TRS has the prob. i would think they would have more of a problem with TRS. “h8” group receiving thousands of shekels. rather than me donating like 20 dollars to various people.

2016-12-25-18_25_00-mint-_-transactions

hahahahahahahahaha SO GENEROUS!!!! SO HUMBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this is how i stroke muh ego and muh conscience. i mean i am totally getting something out of it too. a lot. lets not pretend to be SELFLESS about it! the satisfaction is really THAT strong. it’s almost unfair to THEM. i get WAY more Satisfaction out of donating 5 dollars than they get by GETTING 5 dollars!!!!!

but some people wont donate to george because they feel his current videos arent really doing anything. i disagree. and i give him a LITTLE money just as a good faith thing, to put my money where my mouth is, and maybe he will take my advice more seriously. I really WOULD like to see him try some MJ, make videos about it, and i think myfitnesspal really COULD help him lose weight.

as far as getting women, i don’t even know. i’m almost as much a foreveralone virgin as him.

and i also think becoming more racially aware and alt right could help him the same way it helped me.

so i give him this advice and give him a cash tip to show I’m serious hehehe. i mean i dont think he is getting TONS of donations. i bet he gets BARELY ANY. so when somebody donates ANYTHING, he’s likely to LISTEN to them.

i mean shit. he makes more money than I do. probably TWICE as much money as me. ANd I’m donating to HIM?

want to donate ME money? send bitcoin to

13AZJj5mo4QT8UqE9A4v4cERBQ6wFuEF5d

please hahahahhahahahahahahaha.

uhhhh i dont want to give any of my paypals, i’d have to set up a third paypal for this blog, becuase i don’t want to blatantly confirm my alt right WN identity on this blog, though you can probably figure it out, and thats not even a huge deal to me. i just dont want to make it EXPLICIT, exactly because I don’t want to brag about being a neet loser basically. and being a neet loser undermines my credibility as a WN.

it doesn’t go both ways, me saying I Am A WN on this blog doesn’t undermine my credibility as a NEET……because as I neet, I by definition HAVE no credibility!!!!!!!

Neets are more Punished and Shamed than WN’s! Neets are more hated than White Racists!!!!!!!!!

heh. good thing i have both bases covered.

funny how we can see linda hamilton go from being 24 year old beautiful waifu qt, to being like 57 years old in 2016. An Old Menopausal Infertile Withered Old Hag. She’s prob not obese though. could be tho. I heard Shelley Duvall is now obese.

i am not even gonna look up 2016 photos of either of these women. even by T2 in 1996, linda hamilton had certainly lost a lot of her youthful beauty. it’s a direct function of youth!!!!!!! and that was TWENTY fookin current years ago!!!!!

have invested about 130 dollars GAMBLING since i started gambling at the bitcoin poker room in early 2014. almost 3 years. 130 dollars.  43 dollars a year. thats not horrible. i have seen people blow through like 500 dollars in 2 hours at the real casino. HORRIBLE.

dont know what else to say about that!

but i tell you what, i wouldnt mind to have the privilege to go down the street and buy some dank MJ like George Feels can hahahaha. its really weird how he doesnt really mention it. I’m sure he prob mentioned it for 1 minute, or maybe 1 comment, probably something like “i’m not interested in it” or “i tried it once and didnt like it.” but i think he should at least do a full video on it, and he hasn’t done that. he’s mentioned alcohol blatantly in the title of several videos!

and i think MJ would do him better than alcohol.

not saying he should smoke an oz a day, or get so blazed he has a panic attack. which is a very real possibility for many people, including myself, and the THOUSANDS of people who go to EMERGENCY ROOMS in colorado now that mj is legal, and people get SUPER blazed, have a panic attack, think they’re dying or having a heart attack. i’ve BEEN there, DONE that. it HAPPENS, don’t DENY it, you damn degen stoners. anyway, just saying he should take one puff, get a little blazed. better than getting drunk thats for sure.

it just seems WEIRD that a person who lives in a state with LEGAL MJ would not even TRY MJ and make a big obvious statement on it. while others of us daydream about taking a trip to colorado and smokin tons of legal MJ hahahahahahaha. i mean i might just do it. and visit george while i am there. convince him to sm0ke with me hahahahahahahaha. be like try this maaaaannnn, your life isnt getting any better, you arent getting any younger. hahahaha.

wow looks like george michael dead is NOT a hoax. died on xmas. today. kinda ironic because of his huge hit xmas song. last xmas by WHAM! of course. age 53. nothing saying cause of death. i dont think he had GRIDS tbh. maybe drugs then.

one simply does not pass away peacefully at home at age 53. coulda been cancer. that sucks worse than GRIDS. dying of cancer at 53. sheeeeeeeeit.

i mean yeah he was a gay degenerate but so many Famous People died this year. and really, george michael is not as significant as leonard cohen, david bowie, or prince. but you see what i mean. and cohen was the only one that was really OLD and dying at what i would say is a natural age.

yeah well not even degenerates deserve to die on christmas day at age 53. he had a greek name, not sure how white he was. i guess he was a greek cypriot. cypriot greek. i mean its borderline fam. the ancient greeks were absolutely huhwhyte i know. but modern greek cypriots?????? i mean the man was swarthy af. he had the thickest beard I have ever seen. he was pretty handsome tho. but degenerate. he didnt HAVE to be so degenerate.

sheeeeit i wish i had been born in like 1996. kids these days dont WANT to do drugs, they dont WANT negro secs, they WANT to be alt right traditionalists!!!!!! this new generation is interested in the old morality! and NOT in being degenerates, like my older generation was/is!!!! we were all like, yeah lets get FOOKED UP because getting FOOKED UP is FUN and FEELS GOOD and IF IT FEELS GOOD, DO IT!!!!! nothing was sacred, absolutely nothing. all women were dirty sluts. the only pleasure in this world was to get fooked up on alcohol and drugs, cuz everything else sucks.  beat off to porn, go to strip clubs, maybe bang some sluts at best.

young kids these days are rejecting this garbage, AS THEY SHOULD.

so yeah i have a lot of hope and optimism in the young kids of today, in other words. like the kids who are 16 to 20 right now, in 2016. but people who are 26 or older? fook no. they’re finished. beyond redemption.

hey i WANT to be redeemed. I am done with being a degen. HOWEVER I still want to sm0ke MJ. I’m not WILLING to give that up entirely. i want a PASS on that one. i AM willing to keep it a SECRET from the alt right hahahahaha because i totally udnerstand why they don’t like it. i wouldnt want my kids doing it. more than once a year hahahahaha.

i just need it for medicine because i am irreparably broken hahahahahaha.

i know its shameful and i dont have a problem keeping it in the closet!!!!!

but as long as i dont have it i will continue to talk about it hehehehehehe.

also i would only talk about it in the “CLOSET” of muh neet blog, and NEVER in the out of the closet on my alt right blog, which I don’t really have. I guess muh neet blog would be it!

i mean its gonna happen in the next 10 years. each state is falling one by one to the legal MJ train. and you cant just have a country where half the states have it and half dont. each of those states will EVENTUALLY vote in legal MJ. its INEVITABLE. and i am happy about that. just impatient.

well…..SHOULD i be so happy? because i can agree MJ isnt a generally GOOD thing. i just want to be the exception. so why should i want a society that encourages it? i shouldnt!!!!!!

could it be legal AND socially shamed? fook no. come on. look at alcohol and porn. those are tolerated and celebrated!!!!!! if you are an alcoholic yeah thats kinda shameful, but in every town there are bars full of people celebrating alcohol and getting drunk.

 

HUHWHYTE HUHWHORKERS

wed aug 2

looked up the amount of money i spent during muh unemployment and was horrified and disgusted. i am not a big spender! but somehow i spent a lot of money! essentially blew through a Larger Than Average Emergency Fund!!!!!!!!

heh. the hugest expenses were, by far, car related (aka useless shit tier insurance) and going to see the SHRINK. everything else was DWARFED in comparison to that. even going out to restaurants to play my weekly game was NOTHING in comparison to those two things. also the local grocery store / supermarket was a big thing, but thats not surpirsing.

i made 152 dollars on mturk hehehehe.

yep. car insurance, shrink, and grocery store were biggest expenses because i dont have to pay rent like NORMIES because i am a neet. now, the grocery store should involve a lot of stuff that i am buying for the fam, and or gifts for them. spent more on gifts for them .

cant break down the many categories of stuff i bought at the grocery store, which also includes gas, clothes, food, nonfood.

also its funny that shitty, useless, absolutely cheapest car insurance was the #1 biggest expense. and Budget Shrink once a month was a little below that. my biggest entertainment expense, my weekly, sometimes twice weekly game, didnt even come close. or me buying clothes like a madman. spend 488 dollars on clothing. and that was all this year. well from july to dec 2015 i was pretty much completely dead.

i mean i try to “give money to muh fam” whenever i possibly can by buying them stuff, because they refuse to Charge Me Rent like a Normie fam would, like they SHOULD, because not to is to enable muh neetism, so i fight against that by essentially slipping money into their wallet when they arent looking hahahahaha.

https://mint.lc.intuit.com/questions/1136258-trying-to-change-a-category-not-working

this is exactly the kind of tech support my old company would give, the type of “advice” that woman was great at giving. somebody says the feature is not working. tech support assumes the user is doing it wrong, and gives the the “right” steps. this is exactly what the user IS doing….and it is not working. there CLEARLY is a technical issue that needs to be looked at and acted on by the company. but they sit their silent and just imply that you’re doing it wrong.

spent 369 on muh weekly hobby during muh 17 months of shitty neetness. honestly less than i expected. but oh yeah one place doesnt take credit cards. all this data is coming from muh credit card. i do not use cash anymore for this very reason. analytics. data. reports. trends.

took benedryl because i got the hankering to sm0ke MJ…..but of course i dont have any. might have some in jan 2019 god willing. 2 more years. legal MJ hehehehe. hope to get it on the ballot in 2018, where it would PROBABLY pass, but it possibly could not pass. maybe 60 40 odds hehehehe. of passing.

shit i would even be willing to take a TINY dose of mushrooms. but it has to be TINY. i would rather not feel anything than feel anything. because a bad trip is just not worth it. at all. it will put you into a world of panic, dread, emptiness, despair, fear, hopelessness, death hahahahaha. but good trips can give you the opposite of all that. and that is what i am looking for.

always take less of whatever drug it is. you know who tells you to take MORE? druggie degenerates. OVEN YOURSELF.

i am happy i have totally resisted the urge to type that womans name into google and try to stalk her that way. prob find her linkedin and instagram where she is posting images of her fooking negros hahahahahaha. making spelling errors and poor writing on her linkedin for her Tough Stressful Job where she makes a lot more money than me.

her name getting in the News for being so good at her Career she became an Expert. or maybe doing Activism for one of her Causes. or she went back to school, got highest honors, and is getting a Grad or Law degree.

i mean she doesnt have a unique name so when i searched her before all this shit happened, like in oct 14 to june 15 when i was in luv with her, she wouldnt even be on the first 2 or 3 pages of google. just other people with her same name.

now if you search my name on google, you immediately get my linkedin, my twitter, on the very top of the first page, and i am happy with that. but i really SHOULD have many company and skool awards and blurbs about honors and awards ive won, me and my unique name just got promoted, just spearheaded a 50 million dollar project, etc. got married to a beautiful 22 year old gurl, had a 3rd child, bought a house in a 100% huhwhyte neighborhood, etc, getting respect from respected people, etc.

but yeah. if someone wanted to get in touch with me, they could find my email address REAL easy. SHE could find my email address if she just googled muh name. moron probably couldnt spell it right hahahahahahahahahahahahaha. i am so desperate for her to google me, find the email, and contact me. because she blocked my email and deleted it so she doesn’t know what it is anymore hehehehehe. and she desperately wants to apologize to me and luv me, but she doesnt’ know how to contact me. what bullshit. then she could contact at least 2 people we mutually know. or have someone do that for her. or type my name into google. she OBVIOUSLY doesnt WANT to.

WANT. WILL. WILLINGNESS. are you WILLING to do this. this WILLINGNESS is the most important thing. I dont care if anyone ever UNDERSTANDS me. that’s way too much to ask. i would never expect that. i dont even udnerstand myself. i just want them to luv me hahahaha. thats way better than Understanding. I guess LISTENING is important though. but understanding really isnt. i will never complain about being MISUNDERSTOOD. well, except that she misunderstood my motives. yeah that i care a lot about. not being seen as a niceguy who betrayed her by wiating in the wings, waiting to pounce, ulterior motives etc.

benedryl. makes a man tired hehehehe.

dec 24

heh. xmas eve. benedryl last night. was tired. crashed into bed, slept pretty Well, but past 830 am i could not get back to sleep. even though i still felt tired and groggy and sleepy. still do now at 953 am. sleepy but you cant sleep. so i just am thankful i slept a few hours later than muh New Normal wake up time of 515 am.

i was always anti authority. when i was young i disliked and had no respect for my teachers. well the majority of them. some of them i liked. but i never thought, wow, i LUV this teacher, I want to be a teacher when I Grow Up. I said, this is a sucky profession, it attracts mean nasty people, those who cant do teach hahahaha, and those who cant teach teach at my school hahaha. (and the corrolary of this really pretty offensive maxim is, those who DO, cant teach!)

so why bother trying to teach or learn anything. just sm0ke weed all day and jerk off, try to bang sluts.

in high school i had a better understanding and more respect for teachers or teaching. but i knew the teachers in my private skool made way less money than the rich, lazy, spoiled, entitled public skool teachers, who also didnt give any homework and made skool fun and easy for their students, and 16 yo old gurls were throwing themselves at you in these public schools.

but my teachers were men of principle! who would then be a bit autistic, weird, or mean. maybe they were just butthurt they couldnt get a sweet public skool job.

and of course now i understand that public skool teachers dont really do that well, and you either do SUB jobs till you’re 30 years old, or get a job in the absolute worst, blackest, ghettoest district, and those Plum Teacher Jobs are simply going extinct because, big surprise, they cost the schools too much money. fookin boomers hahahahaha. way to kill the golden goose. fookin joos hahahaha. like the scorpion and the frog.

anyway now i appreciate what teachers do. will stand up for teachers against the teacher-haters, which i used to be. while being even more certain that i would never want this thankless, super stressful job.

old school boomer working class HATE teachers because they only work 6 months out of the year, only work 6 hours a day hahahaha, and see it as the easiest job ever.

but basically when i was IN high school and especially grade school, i wish i had more respect for the teachers heheheheh.

still i dont think thats what screwed me up though. maybe it was just my general disrespect for authority. i didnt’ think anyone knew what they were talking about. i know just as well as they do. well no i sure as fook didnt! well what do THEY know, they’re just underpaid losers at this private skool who couldnt get a sweet public school job! their wife left them and their kids hate them!

also i was butthurt that i “had to” go to a private skool with no gurls. cuz i was absolutely OBSESSED with secs and gurls, even more than i am now. truth is, if i had gone to one of those fantasy public school paradises, i probably would have been bullied by the boys AND rejected by the girls, for being an omega male hehehehe.

then i went to college and the “teachers” here were wildly successful. they were professors at a famous university. of course they were respected, their wives didnt leave them. there were shitloads of beautiful 18-21 year old gurls. and i didnt know how to deal with them. i was frozen in fear and couldnt bring myself to talk to them.

yep 33 inch pants would be just perfect. this means i must continue to lose weight until 32 inch pants would be just perfect.

i guess Dr Phil would be a celebrity, well know, famous version of the type of profession i could see myself doing. helping people with their emotional, relship, family, behavior problems.

who are other famous shrinks? dr keith ablow I hear is pretty good. i hear Dr Laura is pretty good although a J.

i guess tel aviv is the party city of israhell. beaches and clubs and all that. 20 year old israeli gurls in tiny bathing suits. who have absolutely no respect for secs as the life creating act. just want to have fun fun fun. and i absolutely would never want to have babies with them hahahaha. shit yeah i would race mix with them. basically any light skinned 20 year old gurl i would race mix with.  would never make babies with.

maybe i want to be like roosh, traveling the world and banging 20 year old sluts. it really doesnt sound bad. i mean i wish more of these white sluts turned him down. all of them. i dont want white women to be sluts and ESPECIALLY not race mixing sluts going for swarthy persians.

i apologize to intuit tech support because i wrote a kinda nasty comment to them on their shitty tech support article where it appeared there was a bug in the program, then right after i read the shitty article and left the nasty comment that prob wont get read anyway, the program started working again. but i swear i was doing it right! what the hell was i doing wrong? it wasnt a complicated process, it was jsut trying to change the category of a transaction. from what it is defaulted to, to something of my choosing. important necessary feature sure.

well i never attack level 1, i basically attack level 2 and above. for letting shitty service continue. for treating customers like idiots. passing the buck and giving me the runaround. i want a level 2 person to tell me WHEN this is going to be fixed. if its a month or 6 months, FINE. just let me know that poeple who CAN fix it are AWARE of it and PLAN on fixing it. dont just give me a patronizing poorly written response telling me what ive ALREADY DONE. do you really think I’m THAT STUPID. again, I know this isnt the level1 person’s fault. really they should just do away with level 1 and make level2 the new level1. essentially meaning, give the level1s about 100 times more training so they dont always seem so damn inexperienced. but yeah thats a thankless job. even worse than teaching hahahaha. its like teaching something you dont even KNOW. forget knowing how to DO. its teaching shit youve never HEARD OF before.

there were people in uni who took about the same ballpark of MJ as i did, and they turned out fine, ie, 6 gorillion times more successful than me, wife, kids, etc. probably the alcohol did more damage than the MJ. but the MJ did do damage too. because i would rather sm0ke MJ than attack my schoolwork aggressively. i wasnt so much shirking muh skoolwork to DRINK. but i did binge drink a lot on occasion. i honestly do think i did more stupid destructive shit because of MJ though. yeah. actually the MJ i think did more damage than the alcohol. at THAT time. but AFTER uni, the alcohol def did more damage than the MJ. now i dont drink any more and I Romanticize MJ and put it on a pedastal like it was a perfect waifu.

even though its obviously NOT! it makes me paranoid and anxious and panicky and nervous and awkward and lazy and neurotic and jooish and weak!

ive never had a royal straight flush or a nonroyal straight flush but i have had quads quite a few times. is that normal?

got ghoul surf the kali yuga shirt in mail on dec 24. i did not “need” it by xmas and I would rather the poor USPS slaves not slave on xmas eve, xmas day, or saturdays, or sunday amazon deliveries. or midnight shifts at the PO. or split shifts. or PSEs or casuals. i would pay more in shipping for those things.

i should join heimbachs traditionalist workers party because by god am i SERIOUS about Workers Rights, but also by god am I SERIOUSLY against all the leftist marxist jooish revolutionary commie SHIT The Labor Movement supports. I mean they are the leftest of the left and that’s very disappointing. it should not be that way. and maybe A True Populist Movement can give a better way than that.  right wing, traditionalist, JQ Aware, Huhwhyte Huhwhorkers.

all time, i have given 155 dollars to alt right causes. this includes tshirts which should PROBABLY be split because the entire cost of the tshirt does not go to the alt right guy, not even half, it goes to the jooish tshirt company. well, at least the company that does TRS’s tshirts is not jooish at all, and I wrote them a note with my order complimenting them for this.

anyway the size L ghoul shirt fits fine. i was worried about moving down from an XL tshirt to an L. DONT BE. just dont gain the god damn weight back.

hmm bitcoin peaking at like 890 dollars. quickly gonna sell 20 usd worth. buy low, sell high. and it is high. peaked and starting to come down. ok sold 25 USD. makin monay hahahaha.

going into mint and categorizing and recategorizing a bunch of shit.

http://www.tradworker.org/platform/

pretty good outlining of a political and MORAL platform hehehehe. dont know if heimbach is still involved here. welp there is nothing on the site for dnating.