heh heh THANK GOD my actual life is not in ruins, I am very thankful for that. But I thought that would be a hilarious response to the Small Talk Introduction Question of “How You Doin” or “How Are Ya”, instead of saying “Good” or “Just Fine, And You” like is expected, you throw a little curve ball with “My Life Is In Ruins”.  Of COURSE this is meant as a joke, you’re not supposed to get all negative nancy and debbie downer and try to get sympathy. it’s a JOKE. learn to have a sense of HUMOR.  Unless your life really IS in ruins. Then I will try to save you.

nov 30, sat, 11:02am

really hope to get muh traffic up hurr with one a day posts hahaha. lord I gotta stop writing like a 16 year old gurl. anyway still on vacation, still blowing off my Independent Study Homework, although to be fair I HAVE been busy about 60% of that blowoff time with New Job related stuff.

Let me clarify that maybe I’m not against The Career Cult wholesale. Like if you really like college and you really like your career and you’re doing ok and not a ridiculous workaholic neglecting your family, and generally moderately happy, then good for you, keep succeeding at your career. If career is really working for you and helping you win and make money and mate and have a good family, by all means, keep doing Career.

But Careers don’t work like that for all of us who attempt them. sometimes they blow up or fizzle out right in our f00king face, and then it seems we can’t do ANYTHING right, and have become huge losers At Life, and just want to give up and not try any more.

Heh. What do you call it when you don’t want to K yourself, don’t want to End The Pain, there’s not really PAIN per se, but you just want to give up and never try any more??

Morally Lazy Loserness. Heh. wish they had a pill to cure that. or at least heal it a bit, hehehe.

Yeah, it’s called 18yo gurls bending over 4 U. And if you can’t pull that, then maybe 26 yo wimmin.

heh. bad luck in cards. got dealt AA TWICE within 10 minutes (#1 best hand ever, you can wait HOURS to get it ONCE). I THINK it’s not a BAD idea to go All In when you get AA, or even KK or QQ. I ramp it up gradually to suck the people in rather than scare them away. finally get all in, have a nice 3000 chip pot, and then lose it all, TWICE, to some guy getting 3 of a kind or a full house or flush. lost 2000 chips that way, and now just lost 1000 more to the same guy because I was (understandably) frustrated.

heh. times like that i am glad I am not playing with real money!

even though I’ve STILL made more “money” in the past 2 months than I have made in 2 years at Muh Underjob!

I guess the Lesson Learned there, is leave the table, don’t buy back in, take a break, and go back to a lower stakes table if you really want to play more that day (I was at the second lowest stakes, not Bottom Barrel Lowest Stakes.)

But yeah. to lose a lot of money on the best possible hand is very frustrating, makes you reconsider Gambling As A Career Choice, makes even College and Internships start to look better! Because the Lesson Learned is, “Best Possible Hand” is a misnomer, because it depends on the f00king FLOP and community cards, which could make AA a sh1tty hand for you, and 2-7 unsuited a Winning hand for your opponent. because say they get 3 4 5 6 suited, heh heh heh. Bad Beats R Us.

And then of course, you can get BAD BEATS in Real Life too, even when you appear to have a great hand, and are wise to make a Big Bet. And then you get a Bad Beat: you get cancer or lose your job or your wife takes your kids and puts you in jail and your LIFE IS IN RUINS.

What makes a man LEbowski, what makes a success. Getting a job? Getting a mate? Getting a good job? getting a good mate? or just banging as many women as you can and having as many mates as possible and spreading your DNA as widely as possible? Don’t worry about SUPPORTING your children, leave that to the Taxpayers and Beta Males. The main goal is to have as many bastard kids as possible. Do kids REALLY need two loving parents? Heck No! We’re just animals! Some kids grow up just fine without two loving parents! While some kids a SCREWUPS even WITH two loving parents! It’s all a crapshoot! just get as many broads pregnant and LEAVE em! so your kids hate you, but at least you have 90000000 kids and they may hate you, but they can’t take your DNA out of them! So start knocking up women as soon as you hit puberty! they try to nail you with child support, you skip town and become a Deadbeat and try to knock up as many broads as possible before you inevitably go to Jail for your Antisocial, Sociopathic Behavior!

Is Morality Itself Inherently Beta? ABSOLUTELY!

Heh heh. All in moderation. Gotta have a balance of Alpha AND Beta traits. And I personally am a BIG fan of Morality, much moreso than I’m a fan of Betaness. I would aim to be a Moral Alpha if you can. Just don’t let people Walk All Over You.



sorry if i stole that title from anyone, it was just a great search term that brought someone here. we should become Blogroll Buddies cuz we talk about the Same Stuff!

nov 14

well stayed up late till 11.30pm doing Muh “INDEPENDENT STUDY” “RESUME BUILDER” “RESUME SILVER” “HOMEWORK”, kinda humbling nuts and bolts computer stuff, I wonder how Univeristies actually teach Web Dev in a Full Time Accredited Curriculum. The good news is that this is up to date tech that is actually used right now, rather than them teaching you how to write Hello World to a Console in some Oldass Language that is never actually used.

although it is good to understand hello world and console progs and the basics of classes and all that…..just try to do it in a language that is actually used By Employed People, like uhhhh def Java. PHP.

149 pm

woooooohooooo parrrtaaaaaayyy. this might be my favourite hour of the week: got day off tomorrow, can sleep in, can stay up “late” and watch a movie tonight, could go do something fun tonight if i wanted, just finished my stressful progress report where I try to deflect from the fact that I’m not trying as hard as I should be on muh homework.

kinda nervous because I am actually more likely than Not Likely to get called in for An Interview for a Full Time Job, I mean things look really hopeful there. Like they could veyr possibly call TODAY, like RIGHT NOW. And I am famously bad at interviews, which is why I stopped trying.

Actually I wasn’t that HORRIBLE at interviews, I was about average, but because the competition was so tuff, I never got the job….But why would they want to hire a 45 year old with 20 more years of experience, and a masters degree, if companies hate old people, and old people cost more in health insurance????? what’s my excuse now? that I wasn’t YOUNG enough for such entry level jobs?

but it’s like joyce meyer sez. you do your part and let GOD do GOD. Let HIM do HIS part.

Of course I would incorporate the things I talk about here. but yeah fact is I have not done an Actual Interview during the entire time This Helping Losers blog has existed. Just been working at muh underjob as a fairly discouraged underemployed.

anyway just want to capture muh Gr8 mood at a very powerful time of week. got 5 hours of sleep when I like to get Einsteins 10. Meaning I could get 15 hours tonight if I wanted hahahaha. Go to bed at 5pm and wake up at 10am friday, hehehehe. totes skip muh cherished movie, or say i had a hot date, or wanted to go buy a suit or some silver, or go to the casino, or go volunteer at the soup kitchen, or go pound the pavement in muh suit and try to sell muhself for a job like a responsible nonloser with dignity.

fri nov 15

lemme look at muh search engine stats:

“to be a late twenties loser” – yes sir, i can assure you it is not fun, and it’s hard to teach an old dog new tricks. but if I didn’t believe it could be done, I wouldn’t be here.

“are you a loser if your working class” – no, your a loser if you write YOUR, hahahahaha. I got news for ya baby, working class is the new MIDDLE class, bubbelah. Consider yourself LUCKY if Your Working Class with a sweet Fulltime Working Class Job and you can afford to responsibly reproduce and afford to live in a neighborhood where your family won’t be terrorized by the REAL underclass.

Working Class Dog
Working Class Dog (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

this is what I mean when I say UPPER Working Class: you’re working full time, you’re a step above Working Poor, you can afford to Live, you might have a Bachelors Degree Job, you might now, but as the Bachelors Degree continues to be devalue, it’s really irrelevant anyway: The Bachelors Degree JOb IS the same as an Upper Working Class Job, at best.  You could be a Underemployed College Graduate Working 20 Hours A Week for $9 an hour!

So go do a 900000 page dissertation on Marx and postmodern intersectional power and try to figure that one out, college boy f4gg0t b1tch!

ok friday day off. yesterday watched a movie, had to drink a lot of coffee to stay up for that, but it was good, went to bed at like 10:30 pm, slept till about 10:30 am, very nice.  now just being lazy, listening to music/spotify, when a person with human dignity would be out pounding the pavement trying to carry his own weight.

They always ask where do you see yourself in 5 years. so you just give a bs answer, related to that company and their field: oh I want to get my MASTERS DEGREE in management with a concentration in (insert field) and follow a natural professional trajectory to a project manager or team leader position with this company.

NO, you don’t say you want to be living on a BEACH Gambling and buying Gold and sipping W33d Smoothies with a harem of 18 year old girl servants with the 222$ you make per day gambling!

All right I should at least do some CHORES and so should you, try to show some Gratitude for not being homeless and dying of cancer or morbid obesity. And I also hope you get to do a grill doggystyle soon that really makes you go HNNNNGGGGG.



nov 11?

Had to lay down and take a powernap, My new thing is to say I’M JUST GONNA LAY DOWN FOR AN HOUR to meditate and rest because I just got done serving a bunch of customers which makes muh introversion flare up, and muh no energy as well. then that turns into an even longer nap and I feel much better afterwards…..although this makes it VERY hard to get homework/independent study done AND go to bed at 7pm.


Put that Factoid on your WALL and NEVER FORGET.

THEN I discovered THE WORST NEW GAMBLING DRUG EVER, it was like CRACK or METH of Problem Gambling……the “ZOOM” feature of PokerStars. I know they have it at Bolava.lv Real Money Casino as well, prob any Casino worth its while with a focus on THNL/NLH (No LImit Holdem).

To explain it in actually clear terms, which is what GOD put me on this earth to do, to educate people: In NLH you FOLD at least 85% of the time, actually closer to 90% I’ve found. If you are a “newb.” You will get bored and antsy folding NINE out of every TEN hands and say, I just want to play a hand already, often leading you to play a crappy hand, or to overestimate your hand.


ZOOM NLH solves this problem by instantly whisking you away to a new table with new players and a new deal as soon as you fold. It is instantaneous. Fold, get whisked away, get dealt, fold, repeat until you finally get that good hand, then you don’t fold, and play it just like normal.

Playing at least 3 or 4 or 5 times the hands you would just sitting around waiting for the other people to finish the hand.

So there I was, couldn’t tear muhself away for at least 90 minutes. Even better, I started with 1000 chips (maximum) aka “dollars”, and left 90 minutes later with SEVEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. aka “chips”, hahahaha. Which would be like a MONTH of “work” at least. Well, more like two months really! Aka gambling as a good career choice.

see, College Career Cult is a SCAM exactly because it’s Gambling Labeled as NonGambling. Gambling is NOT a Scam because it’s honest about calling itself What It Is: GAMBLING.

And you can make more money in 90 minutes than you can in 90 DAYS with a Masters Degree.

And 100k of Credit Card Debt due to Gambling might be easier to discharge thru Bankruptcy than 100k in Student Loan Debt!

My official position is, as soon as you become a PROBLEM Gambler, quit Gambling. Just like Problem drinking or drugs.

And then I couldn’t sleep thinking giddy thoughts of how a Real Life Casino might implement a version of ZOOM. Like get a little circle of 10 Tables? And then as soon as a person folds, have them move clockwise to the next table, until that table gets like 8 people for a new hand? It would be like musical chairs, always on your feet, but that’s okay. Just keep moving until you find a table that’s in the process of filling up.

The key is, you’d need at least 5 tables and 40 people or so….but that shouldn’t be THAT difficult right?? Not for a Real Casino! You ever BEEN to a Casino? They’re PACKED 24 hours a day! you go there at 3 am on Christmas and it’s packed with The Worst Of The Worst Gambling Degenerates, who have thrown away their FAMILIES for GAMBLING!!!!!

Anyway. It’s ENTIRELY LIKELY that I got Beginners Luck on ZOOM, Indeed, my 6000 Profit came from Two Big Pots where I did pretty risky all-ins, I very easily could have lost it all!

However I DO officially argue that if you’re just looking to make a Daily Quota of 222 Dollars, you could do that a lot quicker and easier than you could at the reg nonzoom tables. unless you play about 4 tables at once.

that’s the one thing that consistently amazes me: you could make a perfectly good living if you were to win ONE POT A DAY on LOW blinds , 1 & 2 dollars, and there a 222$ pot is….maybe a little above average, but certainly doable. Certainly on a 2&4 blind it would be closer to average!!

(Or does the Average Pot Size depend moar on the Maximum Table Buy-in than on the Blind Size?)

Anyway, my point is, there’s NO NEED to move beyond LOW STAKES to MAKE GAMBLING YOUR CAREER. Mid and High Stakes are for the greedy who WILL be cleaned out by their own greed and HUBRIS.


I learned there is also MICRO stakes, below Low Stakes, with a 1&2 CENT blinds.

WARNING: when I won all that money real fast on ZOOM, that was with 5&10 dollar blinds, which is much higher stakes than I like! (1000 dollar max buy in).

NOTE: not sure how they determine the blinds in ZOOM. I think it’s Totes At Random, but I did not get the impression that you were paying blinds any more than you would at a traditional table. Like 1 big blind every 8 hands or so.