ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO RESPECT SOMEBODYS DECISION TO TREAT YOU WITH DISRESPECT

 

oct 13

apparently got up way too early today for 9am test. strangely not pooping even though drinking coffee and have some food that should be ready to go hmmm.

i just hate angry customers demanding explanations that i dont have, demanding to speak to somebody else when i cant transfer them, and i dont have time to Figure Out their problem, and just have to tell them It Is What It Is, Live With It. There’s no tactful way to say this problem isnt serious enough to our company to waste time figuring it out.

when you are sitting there in the trenches desperately trying to bullshit people and survive to the end of another day in hell, the one thing that gives you hope and solace is the idea that the first thing you do when you get home is youre gonna prepare a yuuuuuuuuge spliff and smoke it and get hella blazed. that is your one saving grace. it really does help. without that, things really start to look hopeless.

did not get a ton of sleep last night hehehe .

aha well feel the BM coming now finally hahahaha. usually i dont have to wait!!!!

then i get mad at other people, like HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH THIS? HOW DO YOU HANDLE THIS? and they get mad at me cuz i am mad at them cuz they can so easily tell customers “i dunno, not my problem, deal with it, live with it, cant help you, it is what it is, goodbye.”

well, it is true that what i saw what PERHAPS the evidence of a company on the downfall. well, the company was having a Bad Year, Big Losses, and laid a ton of people off, including in our department. but was the shitty service we gave indicative of that, or was it always like that, even when times were Good and Growing? i mean you always want to save money and do more with less, and that means sweeping Small Problems under the rug.

its just hard being the person who has to tell the person youre sweeping THEIR problem under the rug.

very hard. what do you say?

idk just go with the flow lol  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

yeah well YOU stop listening to your degen music and TELL this person that. give them a damn good EXPLANATION WHY you are sweeping their problem under the rug.

and go suck negro dick some more. spread your legs for negros and make fookin shitsprogs with them.

i might not be in luv with negros, but i can at least admit they are humans hahahaha. they are living human beings and their innocent babies lives have some innate value and shouldnt be created WILLY NILLY. same with any nonwhite babies. I am a sucker for babies. all races babies are INNOCENT HUMAN LIVES that should not be treated like GARBAGE.

im not an idiot i SWEAR. Here, call my high school teacher from 20 years ago when I was a top 5% student and got all A’s.

ok took the test, it was EASY AS SHIT. basically copy an extremely simple table from this paper into excel, using sum formulas and multiplication formulas hahahaha. no index match or offsets or vlookups hehehehe.

and then use an adding machine with paper tape roll to add up a list of 20 numbers. i did not even understand. who uses adding machines.

i was nice to the lady and she was nice to me and i also saw a printout of the 30 people who took the written test a few weeks ago where i did horribly on the accounting questions, i told the lady yeah i didnt do so well on the accounting part, but i took accounting courses in College and got A’s I SWEAR, I could TOTALLY do that stuff again with the debits and credits and journal entries if I just did a little refresher, its not rocket science, its just you get rusty if you havent used it in a few years!!!!!! and she seemed understanding.

jeez. just when i thought trump was past this grab em by the pvssy shit, some more bad shit happens, namely, some b’s coming out saying he groped them. i guess i sort of thought this might happen, and now it is. i like how he is condemning the lugenpresse, because he knows this cant be proven, although youre a woman hater if you think a Victim Might Be Lying, especially if they put their name and face on video and say I, Ms Lyin Slutberg, say that trumps hands were like an octopus on me in 1980, and women dont make this shit up for political reasons hahahaha.

but yeah that is the prevailing idea, that women never lie. and trumps got to get women to believe women do lie, in order to get womens vote. of course women know women lie, but they will deny it to the point of voting against that bad bad man.

but yeah it is def hurting his poll numbers signif. i mean it does not look good folks.

but if he can handle this as well as he handled the pvssy tape, he has a chance.

heh i almost had a heart attack seeing this one cuz i actually thought it was That Woman doing an actual reddit post about ME hahahahahahaha. but its not. i am older than 29 anyway hahahahaha. also it sounds like she rejected him a little nicer because they were still talking afterwards. well…..not really. well, it sounds like she actually told him “im not interested,” and THEN he started asking Creepy Details about her Secs Life. well at least i did not do that! so i am less of a creep and better at respecting boundaries than this guy!

i mean i am fine being a woman hater but i DONT want to be a creep, i DO want to respect boundaries.

I was VERY, VERY, VERY distraught and upset, like this guy, but I think I did an OK job of respecting boundaries…..well just the idea of me getting feelings for her and asking her to hang out regularly was Trampling Her Boundaries!

yeah well she could have stopped saying YES WE WILL HANG OUT!!!!!!!!!! that KINDA got my hopes up!

but yeah i admit i was weak and cowardly and should have blurted everything out in november 2014. that is the lesson i learned, and if i ever get into this situation again, that is what i will do.

i didnt really manipulate our mutual friend to talk to her, but yeah maybe i did secretly hope that mutual friend would talk to that woman and be like hes really upset and you were kinda shitty to him hehehehehehehehe.

but yeah it gets to a point where you really dont have anything to TALK about. i learned pretty quickly that i didnt want to just TALK to her, i wanted a CHANCE with her. the time for TALKING was earlier. like yeah i wish you had dumped me with talking but if you come talk to me now, uhh yeah im still in luv with you, ill still be in luv with you 15 months later. i can accept you not wanting the rel, just tell me no. tell me no and tell me im not a piece of garbage hahahaha. just say aw im sorry youre a real sweet guy like all the other women who “FRIENDZONE” their male friends hahahahahaha and then lets take a little break because you cant be friends when theres one sided feelings, didnt you learn than by age 25 hahahaha.

i will pay for a dumping expert for you to dump me.

or have your mom dump me for you.

but yeah at the end of the day she was a nice person, a beautiful person, and i will never get over her or stop being in luv with her or find a better woman ahahahahahahaha.

this feels as bad as muh First Heartbreak! they say the first is by far the worst, but this one is by far the worst! the 5th or 6th heartbreak hehehehe. well because it was the most significant actual relship.

anyway yeah i guess i understand, if i were in her position i wold have a hard time dealing with me too.

i mean you really do need a professional for these types of things. well ok. i would have her go to my shrink, talk to my shrink for 30 minutes, then i would talk to the shrink for 30 minutes. do a couple of those sessions. and the shrink could relay everything in a mature manner. thats their JOB hahahaha.

yeah well many people are just horrible at their jobs and have no idea what they are doing hehehe.

i mean isnt this what QUALITY ASSURANCE does? makes sure stuff is objectively correct?

i mean i never experienced this before. i pretty much accepted the ITS OVER talk. well, i would try to win them back. didnt work. they would make out with you (and im sure str8 up Pity Fook you, because its just secs). but i was too pathetic to even PUSH for secs because im nervous about secs and am perfectly happy with making out.

anyway winning them back didnt work and i shouldnt have tried it.

well these were crazy middle class jooish college gurls! and That Woman was a nice white down to earth normal woman who was not a Huge Career Woman.

i was a little creepy, but was I SO creepy that I should be totally ashamed of myself? sometimes i am, sometimes im not, and im still not sure how ashamed i SHOULD be, in other words, not sure exactly How Creepy I was.

i mean i dont WANT to be creepy. because “creepers” dont get women ever. its synonymous with undesirable. i dont want to be undesirable. have such deep issues i could never be with a wimmin. i mean they have deep issues too, but it doesnt matter bc women are the supply, therefore i HAVE to not be creepy. it is my responsibility. my mission. i dont want to fail my mission.

heheh got up at 6 am, not a lot of sleep, in mood for nap now at 12 pm hahahaha.

anyway. muh life is in ruins and all i can think about is WOMEN. and this is not a new thing. i always cared more about women and the related drama, than making something of myself. this is one of muh hugest flaws.

cuz i was always way more interested in women than i was in Employment, Education, or Training hahahahahaha. all that stuff was boring at best and excruciating at worst.

yeah i shoud not be writing here, very tired hahahaha. i mean i SHOULD be furiously jobsearching but i dont do that so furiously. hey i did something job related today! and i am on the baby steps plan hahaha.

but i have been on the baby steps plan for YEARS. i need to start doing MORE than baby steps, a LOT more.

GROWN ASS MEN DONT GET ANYWHERE WITH BABY STEPS.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

teen doesnt want to go to college, caretaker says she needs college beause shes not the type to do well without college.

such an easy answer. let the damn kid take a damn gap year, maybe two. also its easy to get a job when you are a 18 year old gurl hahahahaha. take some business classes at the CC because the kid is vaguely interested in “Starting a business” with no plan. so take accounting classes at least, maybe econ, i dunno. def accounting cuz its an actual skill you can get paid for. i mean it hasnt really helped my career hahahaha.

everyones like o just have her get a FT job and pay you rent, which in theory is a great idea…..but what if she cant get an FT job? spends the entire gap year just applying to jobs, going to interviews, and not getting jobs? hehehehe.

which i highly doubt tho, cuz as an 18 year old gurl she could prob get hired at a 12 dollar an hour county job like i just got two rejections today for two such jobs! they either dont like muh gap andor they think i am overqualified andor they dont want to hire white males. they hire a lot of white females though hahahahaha.

anyway if the kid is not DRIVEN in real life, they wont be DRIVEN in college, and being a lazy slob in college is not gonna help them. then you become a huge failure like me hahahaha.

anyway i always knew i was too fooked up to have a rel with a woman, so i wasnt actively looking for one. i knew i had to fix myself first, and that would take YEARSSSSSSSSSSSS until i am 40 or so.

point is, i didnt go LOOKING for a woman when i “found” That Woman. Us becoming friends was the easiest, most natural, most spontaneous thing i had felt in a very long time. we just got along instantly. it just happened naturally af. i didnt LUV her at first. after 2 years of being solid friends, i fell in luv with her. and yet i still was too broken and damaged to be in a rel.

point is, i wasnt putting myself out there, i wasnt trying to FIND a GF in other words. she literally fell into muh life and we got along rather MIRACULOUSLY.

like i think about going on okcupid or something and practicing banging sluts, but i know im not even ready for that cuz muh life is a mess, cant take care of myself, cant be a adult, i gotta get that stuff fixed before i even THINK about women.

hehehehe. yep. get me to stop thinking about women hehehehe.

well thats a lot easier when you are working FT at a terrible job. THEN you just think about surviving one day at a time. you have no Libido, you cant even jerk off UNLESS You look at porno. and it becomes a joyless experience solely to attempt to relieve stress. destress. and it doesnt work nearly as well as smokin MJ.

or quickly crank one out thinking of the Office Young Slut that all the other lonely old guys want to bang too.

if you are lucky enough to GET a job. AND work with even ONE attractive young woman.

but attractive young women can be INCREDIBLY distracting.

well, you will probably be thinking of them ANYWAY even if you dont know or see any. kinda in that position right now. im always thinking of women, but i really dont interact that much with women, and my point is, i dont know ANY attractive young women! but i still think about the idea of them! all the time!

shit maybe send that 17 year old kid to a shrink (i am thinking of them more as a boy than a girl, because gurls shouldnt Go Away To College period.) just to get a damn “tune up” and make sure they dont have Depression or Anxiety or Bipolar. just get a check up, and if they have anything, they can start treating it when theyre young and before they get their whole life off track. maybe the kid is Depressed because they dont seem to have any drive or motivation hehehehe. also make sure they are NOT doing drugs or alcohol regularly. find a male mentor who is 5 years older. 9 at the very most.

if the mentors are too old, they wont know how the world works and their advice wont apply hahahahaha. theyll say go to college, thats your sure ticket to the middle class, hahahaha.

dont get a female mentor.

FEMALES CANT MENTOR.

well, maybe they can mentor children and women, IF they have children of their own.

well what about this guys wife who is a successful business owner.

ok fine, if they own a successful business, ill give them a pass.

and actual entrepreneurs WOULD be GREAT mentors for Teens. but good luck getting access to these privileged, valuable, expensive, very important people. their time is worth 100 bucks an hour just to talk to them on the phone. just go shadow a doctor or something. go shadow bill gates hahahaha.

but yeah going to college right after high school was a HORRIBLE idea for me, so yeah i was VERY interested in that topic.

wewlad finally gonna come in under muh daily calorie goal of 1200, instead of way way over.

ITS SO HARD TO DO EVEN 1 BABY STEP hahahahaha.

but yeah i get SO nervous at the idea of Facing Customers. it is TERRIFYING. like the kids at mcdonalds making 9 dollars an hour. i couldnt do what they do!

but the FACT is, at ONE time, i USED to do pretty high level, in depth, srs business customer service. having deep intense serious conversations.

so yeah i just want to answer all my haters who say i got involved with a woman before i was READY.  it just HAPPENED ok. i wasnt LOOKING for anything. you cant CHOOSE who you LUV.

on reddit some college educated career woman was doing a /sarcasm about sex being “the holy process by which babies are made” /s . i wanted to reach through the screen and punch her in the face for being such a fooking godless disgusting degenerate. THAT SHOULDNT BE SARCASM! THATS EXACTLY WHAT SECS IS!!!!!!!!!!

and i am honestly disappointed that ONLY religious people share my beliefs. I argue endlessly you dont HAVE to be religious, christian, etc to have my beliefs on Sexual Morality, that sex is a darn near holy, sacred, sublime process by which Human Life is created, so have some damn REVERENCE for it.

apparently only religious nuts think this, and everybody else doesn’t.

i am SORTA religious but I stubbornly insist you dont NEED to be to feel this way about secs. even a damn tree worshiping pagan would agree with me!

i was pleasantly surprised to see that there were soem gun owners on reddit. one rel question involved guns and plenty of gun owners responded. i expected everyone on reddit to be violently antigun, anyone who doesnt express only negative opinions about guns is an evil white cis racist hateful nazi kkk trump raeper. so i was glad to be proven wrong there.

everything is NOT OKAY with these women. 25 year old women making 50 grand a year write work emails about things being NOT OK. good god.  and we all have to bow down to the women and fix shit when they think something is NOT OK. no man would EVER use those words to describe anything, unless he is a total cuckold phaggot.

women are very conformist in the way they talk so colloquial idioms like “not ok” and “its a thing” and “its been a minute” and “creeper” and “netflix and chill” and LITERALLY and  just the littlest ways of speaking, the words, the stupid slang, they get really into that and it changes the way they TALK. and men just dont TALK like that, not nearly as much.

 

heh the anxiety reddit is sometimes pretty good, though not nearly as much comments as relshits.

 

yep

 

in this WOMANS defense, I would get anxious about 12-15 hour shifts too!

 

there is a despair reddit too but damn these people are pathetic. but there are some good questions like the above. not alot of answers though.

anyway i think my despair comes FROM muh anxiety which holds me back from taking risks and doing things and accomplishing Life Goals like getting a real job, maintaining the job, getting a rel, maintaining the rel, being an adult, etc.

also anxiety prevents a LOT of people from working. they have panic attacks and crying every day about their job. panicking every morning. panicking at lunch. being exhausted and destroyed at the end of every day.

some suggested that high CBD cannabis can help with anxiety but high THC can Aggravate anxiety? i dont doubt that. but I always think of it in terms of indica vs sativa, and this is NOT the same thing.

well then give me a high CBD indica hahahaha.

 

1 comment basically saying i dunno, nothing helps, try meds and maybe it will help you seem like a normie.

hehehehe. i know that feel.

but yeah. valid, good questions, with barely any responses. bretty disappointing reddit.

well i can at least be gratefu that muh anxiety and despair arent as bad as some of these people. like i can actually go on interviews, 23 of them hahahahaha. (but VERY doubtful about actually doing a job and surviving at it!!!!!!). also i dont get holy shit i must K myself sort of thoughts. more like wow i am a huge failure who has wasted my life and i will never be able to turn it around, but i dont really want to K myself! but i just feel hopeless about being able to become a real adult with an average job, and to get a halfway decent gf, ideally wife. ok FINE i will accept not having children. but i wont accept getting into a rel with a shitty woman out of pure desperation and loneliness. i would rather continue being alone. and just smoke MJ and maybe bang sluts like a degen. its not ideal but i wonder if some secs would make a man more confident which he can then use to do actually good, nondegen things. the ends jsutify the means. by any means necessary.

oct 14

https://www.eremedia.com/ere/why-you-cant-get-a-job-recruiting-explained-by-the-numbers/

yeah the page does exist, ive got it open right now. very discouraging article  written by evil hr person hahaha.

http://insights.dice.com/2014/09/16/recruitings-dirty-little-secrets/

ok ive had enough hahaha

basically i was looking for an Experts Opinion on low-level (data entry, general clerk, entry level admin asst, clerical asst, office clerk) get posted AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN and over and over and over every 3 or 4 weeks, basically the same position in the same location, and you apply 3 or 4 or 5 times until youre ike WTF is going on here, ive applied to this same job 4 times and still havent gotten called for a First Interview or even a Phone Screening, WTF is going on here. has their HR department blackballed me, or is this just not a real job? are they building a pool? there must be 10000 people in the pool by now!! are they trying to build a BETTER pool? its a 12 dollar an hour job! youre not gonna GET mark zuckerberg!!!!!! WHAT IS GOING ON here? looking for an article that explains this phenomenon, but cannot find.

i mean yeah im sure i could get flagged as “DESPERATE, WILL TAKE ANYTHING” in the ATS, which is only half true. I will only take anything that is less than 50% phones hahahahaha, i will take anything that wouldnt obviously drive me completely insane and do a panicquit hahahahaha.

im sure ive got that flag at the hospital where ive applied to 50 jobs. but i’m not applying to shit all over the hospital! i am applying to stuff in my ballpark of qualification!!!!!!!!!!

if there are men looking for the “GF experience”, are there women looking for the BF experience?

well, and im not SURE about this, but my THEORY is that women who get LONELY like this will just end up trying to convert their BFE (probably a Fook buddy or FWB) into an actual BF.

just basically slapping your fantasy image of the perfect GF/BF onto whatever attractive person lets you fook them. then you fook them and cuddle with them and be nice to them and start to want them as your GF even though you have no idea who they REALLY are. pretty much what happened with the first gurl i fooked.

its safe to say if you want the GFE, you want a GF, period.

(yeah this is kind of a NO SHIT SHERLOCK thing when you think about it for 1 second.) so you are at risk. you bang some slut and try to make it a GFE, and then probably end up getting stupid feelings too fast because what you REALLY want is a GF.

i mean its not really STUPID, its completely understandable.

when you search what appears to be specific requisition numbers on a big companys job site and you cant find the job. because i got an email alert saying apply for this job, but no LINK in the email, so i search the req number given in the email to make sure i find the exact job, and nothing. total incompetence by the HR of a YUGE successful company. shit why even post jobs, they can get top talent from top skools, why even open this shit to slobs like me.

less than 1 month to go and the pres campagins are now all about Secs Scandals. this is honestly kinda disappointing. not that secs scandals do not matter cuz they ARE an indicator of Morality, which is more important than anything hehehehe.

well i mean i will accept a president who has groped a few women, but is sincere about making america great again hahahahaha. i will not accept a pres who has groped and raeped a LOT of women and who wants to genocide my race hahahahahahaha.

so what if trump doesnt respect women? I dont respect women! well, the MAJORITY of women hahahahaha. SOME women are respectable. but not a lot.

although on a person to person level, social interactions, i treat everybody respectfully, even if the person may not really be respectable. i mean im not gonna FIX them by being an asshole to them. i dont like being an asshole to people anyway. its too much WORK, its too much STRESS, too much anxiety.

i wish there was a lot more discussion on the anxiety reddit. there is 10% of the talk as there is on the relships. but anxiety CAUSES SO much trouble with relships, with life in general. well, for men at least. women can still have anxiety and get Rels and Jobs because they are the supply. they are very much in demand. men will bend over backwards to Help Women. thats just the way it is. accept it. dont get MAD about it and complain that its UNFAIR. its really NOT, because women get pregnant. now it might be unfair that women arent AWARE of this, and its definitely infuriating. and it IS fair for you to get angry about that, hahahahahahahaha.

WE HAVE NO RECORD OF THAT.

another great it is what it is, not our problem, oh well, youre screwed, deal with it type statement you can give to your customers.

im not saying youre lying, but youre lying. we have no record of that. not because were incompetent.

so youre telling me that my wireless card is just gonna keep disconnecting every single day, and the only way to “FIX” it is to restart my computer 10 times a day, repeatedly run network troubleshooting 10 times a day, and just WAIT when i lose internet for 10 minutes at a time every day and have to tell my paying customers, sorry, you have to wait 10 more minutes before the computer can take your money. nope we cant give you a discount either because budget. gotta cut costs goy. no refunds, no exchanges, no discounts, no service, no guarantees, all sales are final.

some people hate sitting in TRAFFIC. but you know whats even WORSE? actually being at work and having to deal with those callers and customers and tasks! traffic is EASY!!!!! its a NO BRAINER!!!! you just sit there and wait and move verrrrrryyyyyy sloooooooooowly. you already know how to HANDLE it. you dont need to make 1000 flashcards and study every night on how to deal with heavy traffic. its simple, its not complicated, its a 1+1 math problem.

meanwhile every phone call is a fookin Calculus 5 story problem where they bitch at you to explain why on every step, and youre not doing this fast enough, and dont you know what youre doing, why cant i speak to someone who knows what theyre doing, nobody in your department ever knows what theyre doing! isnt this your JOB????

so yeah i hate that. it is very nerve wracking, anxiety provoking.

now, anxiety was not a big problem for me for a good long while, from like 2010 to 2013. i was working an easy job, handling that, i wasnt anxious and nervous. i was grumpy and angry and hateful sure, but not anxious. 2014, 2015 were huge anxiety years, carried over into 2016 as well.

but it was nice to go several full YEARS without as much anxiety. but then it comes back for YEARS again. damn.

We have no record of this. Please reboot your computer and wait 10 minutes before attempting to use your cash register or office computers. Discounts/refunds must be approved by CEO, or create a Cash Drawer Shortage so your manager can fire you for stealing. Hope This Helps!

was this because i was working at a failing company, and everybody knew it was failing? (except for people who just listened to music all day and said idk go with the flow lol idk) the customers, the managers, the nonmanagers, the field, the support, everybody with half a brain?

when your customer says, this is DISGRACEFUL service, and you say, yeah i agree, but there’s nothing i can do here. i am the manager. policies. ill get in trouble. we cant just give discounts away. our company will go out of business. and then it goes out of business anyway through a combination of giving away discounts, bad service, low quality, high prices.

whos supposed to be doing this, because i dont know how to do this. oh im supposed to be doing this? says who? let me speak to their manager. oh theyre not in. you have one manager for 5 locations. ok whos the acting manager. nobody. ok whos the smartest person there. oh he’s not in. WHO IS THE SMARTEST PERSON WHO IS THERE RIGHT NOW. hes in a meeting. ok, then who is the smartest who is in the building, who is not in a meeting, who can talk to me right now? nobody, were all on the phone with customers. i am literally the only person who can help you, and i dont know what im doing.

ok who has the most seniority/experience. oh this whole office/location is new. ive only been here a month and all the managers have only been here 2 weeks. NOBODY knows what theyre doing. so we call people for help, and THEY dont know what theyre doing.

sheeeeit times like this i need to get out of the house. i did apply for one job thank god, a military civ job. only took 16 minutes. well when you ONLY put 16 minutes or 15 minutes into a app, thats a good GUARANTEE that you will never get an interview! hahahahaha. you should be spending at LEAST an hour on every app, really fine tuning it to each job hahahaha.

anyway i have decided to go to the store today and get a white dress shirt that fits me a bit better than the one i usually wear for interviews, which is too big.

later

ok did that. felt the need to get out of house and DO something, not just complain in here, and force myself to apply for Jobs. and not “just” go for a walk, but DO something, anything i needed to do, like get a white dress shirt that fits better, or go buy laundry detergent for the home. going for a walk is fine, i need to lose weight (not really, but i do WANT to!) but i wanted to Baby Step Do Something today.

went to burlington for the shirt. we had a majority white town thank GOD but burlington in the middle of the afternoon is NOT majority white. there were a ton of blacks and especially arabs there. some asians.

the arabs in my town, you wouldnt have to worry about them joing ISIS, but they might be contenders for drug dealing and Raping White Gurls. but i dont think they are too islamic. they just speak arabic and haggle with cashiers at burlington and grope women and probably like to drink which is absolutely haram. smoke hookahs all day and watch soccer.

got some diet coke because i was curious to mix it with my coffee.

rejection emails that reference requisition numbers that DO NOT MATCH WITH the requisition numbers stated on the taleo site! it gives a 7 digit number, and all the req numbers i see are 6 digit! so i cant even match it up with a job on my spreadsheet for certain, because i recorded the 6 digit req number!!!!!! so i dont know which admin assistant job i was rejected for!

or you take 10 minutes to apply for a job (contingent (casual) job no less) and only when youre DONE does it tell you the job has expired. thanks NEWTON ATS.

wewlad. finally got in muh 3 apps for the day. so much shit is coming up expired. or i already applied to it but couldnt figure out if i had or not. felt like it took forever. much longer than the 42 minutes it should have taken hahahaha.  in fact it took 46 minutes hehehehehehe.

kirkland vodka. apparently critics say its better than gray goose and also way cheaper.

that basically all kirkland booze is high quality and reasonably priced.

i just thought that was kinda funny. as a guy who used to drink fooking near-bottom shelf canadian whiskey like canada house and rich and rare and royal canadian and CANADIAN HUNTER hahahaha. i couldnt even drink something good like VO or Crown Royal. once in a while i did canadian club hahahahaha.

Rich and Rare was probably the best quality for a low price, shameful booze, and candian hunter was the most BADASS……but not really the best quality. I cant not recommend the Rich And Rare though. got EPIC drunk off of that shit.

actually R&R was pricier than royal canadian.

i really dont know how i got into drinking steel reserve tho. BAD idea. i mean why not just drink lots of regular beer like miller lite. well, i did that too!

maybe get some kirkland weed hahahahahahahahahahaha. well im sure if they had some, it would be good.

i guess Kirkland Shirts are pretty good. not sure about pants hahaha. get some nice Kirkland Jeans hahahahaa.

10 thousand word post. this is definitely top 5% length folks.  just ridiculous.

get a kirkland wife hahahaha. kirkland mail order bride.

ya know i am not interested in a mail order bride at all. even a white one. maybe when i am 45 – 50 i will be hehehehe.

ok moved some of this long post to the previous post to match the lengths a little bettter.

i mean i just want to get a LOT of MJ right now. like a 4th or half ounce! like 100 dollars of MJ i would buy right now. i mean im thankful to have that kind of money, but thats what happens when you are a neet who didnt have a ton of expenses and saved most of their money when they were working.

are there any neets who ARENT virgins?

well probably. what i mean is there any neets who are getting secs from nonhookers at the time of their neetness? or even has a gf? neets with a gf? dont make me laugh hahahaha.

ate way too much at dinner again. went over limit of 1200 for the day.

now i CAN get all the way up to 1500 and not GAIN weight. ie 1500 is muh BMR. well i got to like 1450 today.

lesson: if your one Big Meal is a huge meal at a restaurant, that will put you well above 1200 unless you do a LOT of ezercise that day. like 500 calories at least. which some people can do in 30 minutes of running. not me. takes a solid hour of dam jogging.

sheeeeeeeeeeeit well i found the company THAT WOMAN works for and it is pretty damn close to muh house. well i saw a posting from the company on indeed and looked at it, then looked up the location of the company. it was about 2 or 3 miles from muh house.  thankfully i never go that way.

well i am now mad that she gets a job that is close to her home, closer than the last one. and that she can handle taking help desk calls.

well maybe she cant! maybe they put her on phones and she flipped the fook out because she’s not used to phones.

and it doesnt matter! it just sucks that i still think about her at all!

because i havent found a good REPLACEMENT for the positive stuff i got from her. namely a good connection with a decent woman, a real rel. its easy to have casual secs (well, not for me) but its HARD to have a real rel. real rels are inherently noncasual. they are long term. it is HARD to replace that shit.

and i am not happy at myself, that i looked up the exact location of the company. but i saw the company randomly on indeed, without searching for it, saw it was located in a city near mine which is a small city with nothing but machine shops (and i should really get a job at one of those, but then i might see her hahahahaha) and i was surprised that this type of company was in that city, THEN i looked up the exactly location, which, because it was in this small city, was OF COURSHE going to be close to me.

THEORETICALLY she could stop at the huge grocery store near here, to or from going to her job, and i could see her at the store, because this is the grocery store nearest to my home, and i go there regularly. was there today.

this is what happens 15 months after someone you never even fooked or dated dumps you hahahahaha.

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit.

heh i applied to an Entry Level Data Entry job which ive applied to this same job 3 or 4 times. it just keeps appearing and appearing. i apply and apply. it gets hundreds of applicants every time. why keep opening it. very fishy. this time i totally forgot to change the name of the company from my previous cover letter. (i did change it the first time its mentioned, in the first paragraph, but forgot to do the second time, in the third paragraph.) sheeeeeeeeeeeeeit. now i am probably on a blacklist and should never apply to that job again. its disgraceful they even post the job so often. i am sure there si high turnover, lots of blacks. why cant they call me!!!!!!!!

yeah but i want a company that posts jobs rather than never posts jobs, right? even if they already HAVE all the candidates they could possibly need????

that feel when you get to 5 jobs in 1 day for the first time in a while because youve been getting discouraged and slowing down, then find out 1 of those is DEFINITELY disqualified because you made that stupid mistake.

thing is, they probably wouldnt even really care.

i hate that dumb blacks can get these jobs just because they dont have Anxiety HAHAHAHAHAHA no i am just partly kidding. its not because of Anxiety that i dont get these jobs, because i hide the anxiety FAIRLY well on interviews and fake my way as being MOSTLY normie with a normie level of interview anxiety. but it is very true that blacks have less anxiety than whites. its just the way they are wired. so they can aggressively grab women by the pvssy and impregnate as many women as possible in a total r selection strategy. and the women love it.

 

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INCONGRUENCE

913

went to church and sat there bored and looked for attractive young women, begged GOD for a MIRACLE to TRANSFORM me and give me a new brain, give me the desire to work hard and not get distracted.

i am in the angry judgemental phase where i think EVERYBODY is degenerates. everything and everyone is too degenerate for me. bunch of filthy animals fooking and breaking hearts and cheating and lying and hurting and doing harm and not caring about.

might have some nyquil tonight, want to take it early because it lingers forever, like 16 hours, so want to take it around 5 o clock.

i am convinced that because i was always underconfident at my job and there was such mass confusion and no faith that anyone really knew what they were doing, and there was a huge divide against the few that seemed to understand stuff or at least bullshitted REALLY well, vs the many that didnt; that all workplaces are gonna be like that, that people will always be confused and not understand you, and that the people who can really HELP you are hidden behind walls of Confused Gatekeepers. I understand the role of Gatekeepers to give the Decision Makers time and space to Make Decisions, but how do the Gatekeepers know what they’re doing? how can they correctly advise people at the First Level of contact if they dont know what theyre doing?

well, they can either bullshit you, outright lie to you, or tell you theres nothing they can do where they dont know that for sure, basically give you the RUNAROUND, or PASS THE BUCK. and the person they pass the buck to does the same thing and say “well the first person shouldnt have done that, call them back again.”

went to a local bar last night and it was just stupid. this wasnt even a particular bad bad. it was a completely average bar at 10 o clock on a saturday night. just working class average normalfags, not really any alpha male peacocks or “BROS”, and not really a Dive Bar either, meaning they do intend to attract Semi Attractive Females to some extent, rather than have a Total Sausage Fest on Friday Saturday nights. and there were like 2 attractive women in there, so good job bar.

the service was good and the food was good and the people werent even too obnoxious. but i was just annoyed by the loud stupid music and in general it seemed like a sad way to spend a saturday night. groups of men without women, and a decent number of lonely looking 45 year old men sitting at the bar sucking down bud lites and watching sports on tv.

and the more young attractive women that are at a bar, the more obnoxious the crowd gets with young alpha males and bodybuilders and Bros and  Douchebags and such, so im glad there werent a ton of women.

but yeah i wanted to get out of there before an hour. just went and drank a coke, ate some wings,  smoked a cig, said ok lets get out of here. nothing to do here. well they had pool tables to play pool so that’s fine. a bunch of guys where playing pool, something to do, i can understand that, even though i dont get big into playing pool, and everyone playing pool is always a Pool Shark.

and then i thought of my female former friend going to bars like this and having guys try to charm her, buying her dranks, her fooking them, who cares, getting preggers, who cares, you can either have a abortion or have a babby with an absent father, who cares, it doesnt matter.

and i thought about how when i knew her, she said she didnt like bars and didnt think they were fun and people tried to get her to go to bars but she would never go, and i thought that was awesome, and was a reason i liked her, becuase i dont like bars either, as illustrated above, and only go when i am with friends who really want to go, which is not very often!

Men Without Women will always be a bit jelly of the men with (younger) women. basically i men women In Their Twenties, who are not blatantly ugly, who do not have Kids. The Most Desirable Women in other words. Like Muh Female Former Friend hahahaha. yep i would have been very happy with her. no sense of “settling for less” there. and then heart torn out like temple of doom.

the SUDDENNESS and the figurative VIOLENCE of it shocked me. one day i was in luv with her and she was the perfect angel, the next day she had nonverbally announced that it was Permanently Over Forever.

in my defense and in her non-defense, she didnt SEEM like she wanted to be done permanently. the few times we touched on the topic in stupid messages she said sort of sorry for not hanging out, we would hang out someday, she was just isolating herself from her friends, she “missed” me; although she hinted in an ealier message that she was annoyed by me being pushy, then i apologized profusely and said i wouldnt bug her at all this month if she told me we could hang out next month. of course we never hung next month, or the month after that, or the month after that, or the month after that, and by that time i was getting pushy again. but you could sorta see why. i honestly thought we were gonna hang out. whenever she said we would EVENTUALLY hang out she said it in a nice way. plus she was going through legit life stuff.

even if she is secretly in luv with me but has some inner Fear holding her back, i cant remove that fear for her!

this is related to “if someone REALLY WANTS something, they’ll DO it, so if they dont DO it, that proves they dont really WANT it.”

well you have to look at what youre talking about. basically i am talking about things IN YOU POWER. Like Yeah I really WANT her to luv me, but i cant make her, thats out of my power. or i really WANT to have a low stress 15DAH Job, but i have no idea how to get that, well, im not willing to do the years of grueling work to get there.

people are held back from doing the things they really want, by fear, by circumstance, by pretty understandable constraints.

like i wont make a phone call because i am anxious and because i have time to procrastinate, even though i want to get this billing issue settled. i just dont want to make the phone call! so i procrastinate.

so is she procrastinating on Luving Me, because she doesnt want to deal with it right now?

i dont think so, because in this situation, ALL SHE HAD TO DO WAS NOT SHUT ME OUT. and respond to an email. communicate with me. she didnt have to work for it for years. i was right there at her doorstep offering up my heart. she just had to say yes. so yeah i dont think fear was holding her back. this is just how she really feels hahahaha.

i wasnt making it hard for her, i was making it easy, serving it up on a silver platter, at her doorstep, all she had to do was say yes. she already passed the test. she didnt have to get a masters degree or be the top employee for 10 years or jump through hoops. she had already jumped through the hoops of be in your 20s, dont have kids, dont be promiscuous, dont be ugly, have decent morals, be a decent person, be chill, dont be too crazy, get along with well, trust, respect, and……communication. well obv the communication killed it.

but yeah it was too sudden for me. she was giving mixed signals about wanting to communicate. i thought she geniunely wanted to communicate in time. maybe she did. but the avoiding and avoiding and avoiding was getting to me, and pushed me to the breaking point.  i could not wait any more.

anyway. if people want to do something, they will do it, and dont be autistic about that statement. i mean in terms of commuincation. where all the person needs to do is send a text or an email or have a conversation. pretty low barrier right there. dont have to be top of your class in a stem degree.

anyway i see other women being b’s and think OH SHE WASNT LIKE THAT wawawawawa and then think, WELP, SHE ACTUALLY PROBABLY IS, and then BUT IT DOESNT MATTER DOES IT.

i dunno. she used to be warm and nice and gentle to me, i would have really appreciated her extending some of that warmth to the ending of things. just so i dont remember her as an evil fooking kvnt, which i know shes not, but i guess i wanted more CONGRUENCE. Congruity. Less Dissonance. also that would have lessened the SHOCK and the “violence” and suddenness and PAIN.

its like stupid movies where people are driving in a car totally unassuming and then BAM surprise collision with another car coming out of NOWHERE at 100 mph in a split second.

WHATEVER, its just a case of NO CLOSURE, make your own closure, this happens to literally EVERYONE, just like True Love, just like True Heartbreak.

it helps if you have a decent job you can go to to avoid it and kill time tho, and fucc gurlz to bang mindlessly. a harem.

sometimes i feel like an adult man with DOWN SYNDROME who just simply does not have what it takes to make it in the adult world.

i wonder if people with DOWN SYNDROME ever fall in true luv and get married. i think they do sometimes. im not sure if they can have kidz tho.

took nyquil at 5 pm, then ate dinner, then went for 3 mile powerwalk. usually i would take the nyquil when coming back.

well i like this taking it before everything! it is really necessary to avoid next day hangover.

well hopefully.

18YOQTs, SUPPLY OF JOBS, CRIMEA RIVER, HNNGG HNNGG HNNGG

monday 8 26

WOW SUPER grumpy this monday morning. ending it all sounds like a REAL good idea. worst monday monring in recent memory. and no reason for it! other than the usual excuse of “being a loser.” wah wah crimea river.

tues

went to “bed” at 7pm.

still wanted another hour of sleep when woke up. super duper bad mood tuesday morning, but shook that off quicker than on monday. now 12pm and has been super busy past couple of hours. super busy. god almighty. but maybe i’m happier cuz it is my 8 hour day.

i see enough beautiful 18 year olds every day to know for a FACT that an Unlimited Supply and Variety of 18 year old Tail would DEFINITELY come close to Approximating True Love.

I would be very happy with one or the other. would not ask for both. wouldn’t need it. just one or the other. Actually, the neverending supply of Teen Tail might be BETTER. Its only downside is that it flirts with Immoral, Decadent filth; pornography. Flirts with, but does not have to be. Note that these girls don’t WANT commitment anyway. Good, cuz neither do I hahahaha.

wed 751 am

so. my “new” favorite thing is to lay face down on bed and LISTEN to tv because too much energy to prop head up on pillow and WATCH it, better transition to sleeptime. did that at 6:30 pm spongebob, all lights out at 7 pm, got some fairly decent sleep, an erotic dream that was kinda fun. just a random girl. a big4ss white trash slut. nasty but tolerable. better than a known entity.

major lesson: do Lights Out at Seven Pm For Best Results.

still took powerwalk, that was good.

REALLY gotta buy new clothes soon.

saw an 18 year old tiny blond girl wearing the tightest pants possible. she was TINY and YOUNG, very young looking, and usually don’t go for girls so small, but her youngness sealed the deal, it was almost like A Whole New Gender, hehehehe.

Does it REALLY need to be SO competitive to get into the Physical Therapy or Occupational Therapy Program? Yeah, it’s a better field than Sociology, but I don’t think it’s even in Top 10 of Job Openings, or something else to merit rejecting a SOLID 80% of Applicants. THAT’s how Competitive it is. 80% of people who WANT to get in DON’T. Why do they WANT to get in? I don’t see a HUGE GLUT of PT jobs to justify such a ridiculous demand.

Heh. So I’m wondering how a person decides on Physical Therapy for an Education and Career choice. You can’t just WALTZ into the job, AND you can’t just WALTZ into the EDUCATION, and believe me, you can get MASTERS and DOCTORATE in PT. Sh1t to get an entry level job you need a Bachelors degree.

Unless my local Nonprestigious College happens to have a Very Prestigious PT program, I dunno.

But this points to my larger point, that 30 years ago, you didn’t have to TRY to find a Entry Level Full Time Job, you just needed a PULSE. Now you can spend your whole LIFE going to COLLEGE and switching majors and getting useless degrees and NEVER get an Entry Level Full Time Job, because your CV wasn’t remarkable enough, your GPA not high enough, not enough extracurriculars, too many GAPS, too old, you don’t interview well; forget just having a pulse and showing up to work every day on time!

But then there’s people who Say that finding a Full Time job in North Dakota is EASY because ND has the lowest unemployment and the boomingest economy. I certainly think abotu it every day!!!

So i guess you’re “supposed” to spend your teens and early twenties wanting to Bang everything that moves, then in your later twenties, you’re supposed to develop more Lasting, Mature Relships, with an Eye to someone you want to Spend Your Life With. Heh. I had it ass backwards. When I was young, I wanted a Monogamous Loving Waifu. Fell In True Waifu Luv 7 times. Now I am old, and just want to B 18 year olds! NOT Sadistically, NOT hurting or hating anyone, But Sort of Decadently. I want to bang at least 100 18 year old girls in my life. If you get tired of one, move on to the next. Simple, easy, effective, perfect. Fundamental Ontology. Priorities in Life.

thurs 8 29 13 9:39am

did my “long day” yesterday. When I took Hard Class, I would have at least 2 “Long Days” per week. They are good for Feeling Productive, but much moreso if you are actually doing Paid Work, compared to Free Work or Paying For Skool.

Had another semi erotic dream. In this one I was making out with a Very Cute Young girl. You know the girl is very CUTE and young, if you actually enjoy making out with her before plowing her, hahahaha.

these the Attitudes that Normally, naturally Form when you never manage to pull from QTs, and then you say, well I don’t wanna bang non-QTs, so I’m gonna be a kissless virgin wizard all throughout my 20s!!!

Heh, you’d think I’d be more willing to Lower My Standards, especially considering I’m old, fat, bald, loser, underemployed, costanza. When I was actually YOUNG, I was a lot more Physically Attractive and could actually Pull QTs, and I wasted that by not pulling a LOT of QT action, but Far Less Than A Bare Minimum, which is still Far More than Wizards Pull, so, I’m grateful for that, hahahahaha.

But yeah you see some 18 year old student with nice skin and a tight bum and bright eyes and perky bazooms and you think, yep you can sit on my face, you can sit on my face, yep you too, I wouldn’t mind that, lemme clear off a place so you can sit on my face, etc etc, 90000000 times a day. THAT’s pretty overwhelming, and why Men and Prime Of Youth Women should be kept separated, because it’s very distracting and overwhelming!

From ages 18 to 25, Women should be Locked Away in Women-World, and not let out until they’re safely MARRIED.

Heh. Funny how “you” want 18 year old QT Younggirls to Sit on “Your” Face, but not really so much Thirty Year Old Women or Older!!! Then you think, UM NO. EW. GROSS. But 18 year olds? ALL DAY. SIT ON MY FACE ALL DAY. Now THAT’s True Heterosexual Attraction!!!

It’s analogous to the making out. The older the get, the less you want to make out with OR have them sit on your face.

Disclaimer: While it is natural and normal for Most Men to have a Preference for Younger Women in GENERAL, I have taken that to a whole new extreme. Exaggerrated, inflamed, inflammatory disease. Upped the contrast level. To an arguably Pathological, Detrimental level. So how do I train my Animal Brain to Tone it Down, to sand off the sharp edges? Dunno. Would probably be like trying to “cure” the gays with electric shocks. It’s as hard-wired as it gets. Just an extreme variation of natural behaviour.

Can you Curb the Anxiety of Constant Horniness by Beating Off To Porn? Probably a LITTLE bit. Like a 1% Purity of the Drug, when you’d like 100%. And By God, I’ve been lucky enough to experience something like 90%, back in the day. But Not Enough. But with stuff that powerful, can there ever BE enough???

Or can you say, “YEAH, I DID OK. Not Perfect, but OK. I’m not Hung Up over it or anything. I’m No Superman anyway. I’m Happy with what I Can Get.” Which would be the Mature Response.

Or you can be a big immature Adult Baby and say wah wah, I want 18 year old girls, nothing else. I want I want I want, gimme gimme gimme!

Really weird. The blend of Entitlement, but not being Confidence And Powerful enough to back up that entitlement.

So yeah. School’s In For The Year, and I saw more cute 18 year old girls I wanted to sit on my face, in the span of one hour, than I have in the past 3 months, then I think of How LoOoOoOoOng it’s been. MANY years. And even back then, it was just a small taste. Just to Whet the Appetite. The logical, sensible thing to do would be: go to a hooker, go hoggin, TAKE what you can GET, learn GAME and actually USE it to pull better quality.

So yeah anyway. When I come up with my “Rules” of Attraction, like does the girl make you go HNNNGG, or 18 or 22 or you’re done, or would you enjoy making out with her, would you enjoy Cunnilinguus, would you lick the sweat out of their 4ss on a hot day, because they are 18 years old etc, realize this is the product of a Diseased Mind, hahahaha. A Diseased Mind, AND Perpetually Horny, AND on a Many-Year Drought, AND sees 900000000 beautiful 18 yo QTs EVERY DAY. A Perfect Storm of Erotic Stress. This Biases, Prejudices my view, quite understandably!

Of COURSE there are MUCH more important things in life, like FAMILY and WORK and MORALITY and DISCIPLINE and AMBITION. They just don’t “FEEL” (hate the word feel!) as important when you are RARING TO GO!!!

How “Average” is the “Average Frustrated Chump,” or, in today’s parlance, Beta? Lesser Beta? Omega? A Self-Selected bunch of Woman-Haters who read and comment Woman-Hating GAME and Pick Up Artist blogs??? r9k neckbeard virgins who watch tons of p0rn? people who generally use the internet too much and don’t interact with Real People enough????

But the 18 YO QTs overstimulating me are definitely REAL!!

MOVIE REVIEW: yeah this is more of a joke, I will not do Serious Reviews of “Really Obscure” Art Movies any more, as that would Identify me. So I’ve been meaning to see “Insidious” since it first came out at theatre. Always looking for a good hore movie. kept pushing it back in the queue. FINALLY the time was right, by god I wanted to watch it. It wasn’t super good, wasn’t GREAT, but it was pretty good. Dialogue sucked, but the acting was good, some good scares, kept my attention till the final Act, which was going well, until BAM the disc crashed suddenly, no warning, no skips. Bam. Stop. Unable to read disc. This is about 10 minutes from the end of the movie, and I was still liking it. Hadn’t jumped shark. I was angry and frustrated. But I have been on a streak of Not Bad Movies lately. Real uncanny. wonder when the shoe is gonna drop there.

HNNNG. 18 year old shorthaired girl with GREAT 4SS in jeans. HNNGG!!!!!

Hnng is the new schwing, remember that scene in waynes world where garth is at some party or something having an actually normal conversation with people, but stops to say SCHWING every time a “hot babe” walks by, which is every 2 seconds, because waynes world just went hollywood or something. That’s me going HNNGGG every 2 seconds when a 18YOQT walks by who I want to make out with then sit on my face. GOD DAM RIDICULOUS.

ok gotta wrap this up. a great line I heard today, the day the fast food workers were gonna do their Strike for $15 an hour. I saw a bunch of Adult Students Going Back To College because That Is Sure To Get Them All Jobs, College Will Make The Unemployable Employable, College Will Create Jobs Where None Existed Before, College Is Magic, Companies will hire Adult Students from Low-Prestige Colleges over Young Students from High-Prestige Colleges, more excuses, etc, hehehehe, ANYWAY, this one loudmouth (woman) was complaining about The Audacity: “$15 an hour! COME ON! That is for SKILLED PROFESSIONALS! My HUSBAND doesn’t even make $15 an hour!!! And my Macdonalds was cold today!”

So I thought the whole situation was hilarious and sad. My opinion is quite moderate: maybe $12 would be more reasonable; or giving people Full Time Hours; and I acknowledge that Fast Food Work is Harder and Much More Stressful than Average People realize.

But it’s her fault for marrying a loser who couldn’t provide, hahahahaha.  Maybe he needs to go to college for physical therapy and maybe, just maybe, if he gets a 3.99999 GPA and performs better than 80% of his class, then he might get a $15 an hour job.  But still everybody has to take out a 50k loan and gamble at the casino anyway.

but again I have a really distorted view of reality, so don’t listen to me. I used to think I lived in an “anti-intellectual” or anti-collegefag area, where only rich soft boy scout faggots go to COLLEGE, but this was inaccurate; its more like EVERYONE goes to college, because they can’t find jobs otherwise, or they’re laid off and are getting Taxpayer Dollars to go to college, so I really can’t blame them for doing so.

The Media says there are Technical Jobs waiting Unfilled because there’s no one to fill them, no one with the proper training and skill set; but I don’t really believe that, because everyone from age 18 to 80 is In College, College is the “New” High School, not like that is anything NEW!!! Except High School you don’t have to take out an Unforgivable Mortgage to go to!

Heh heh yeah I have a Fatally, Pathologically Bad Attitude.

My Homework To Do List For YOU (and me):

http://bls.gov/ooh/occupation-finder.htm?pay=&education=&training=&newjobs=50%2C000+or+more&growth=&submit=GO

So here is a list of 94 Jobs from Outlook Occupational Handbook of BLS. This is really the best way I know to find out this information, there are prob better ways!  I want to know the SUPPLY OF JOBS. NUMBER of JOB OPENINGS. It Stands To Reason that it should be EASIEST to GET a job, where there are the most openings. They won’t turn away losers who didn’t go to harvard, or who have Average College Extracurriculars, in other words!

Teach Your Children to go for one of those 94 jobs. I’m thinking Long Term, a Slow But Steady Growth Rate is better than a 20% growth rate over 2010-2020, right???? cuz what if it takes a nosedive after that. or what if it doesn’t.

http://bls.gov/ooh/occupation-finder.htm?pay=&education=&training=&newjobs=50%2C000+or+more&growth=&submit=GO

Physical Therapists and Software Developers, hahahahaha.

Anyhow. hehehe. I never said Physical Therapy was a BAD field!

Heh. I wish Banging 18YOQTs was a Job, and on there!

Wow. How do you FIX a Fundamentally, Deep-Seated BAD Attitude? Eradicating thoughts like the above from your mind??

Ok, I wish Banging 18YOQTs was not a job, and was not on there. That would be a stupid job. And 30 year olds are hotter than 18 year olds. hehehehe. more age appropriate.

“But that’s such a Stupid Euphemism, Age Appropriate!!”

Heh. It really kind of is.

No It Isn’t.

I will Be Age Appropriate And Go To College For A Physical Therapist or Software Developer Job.

your homework:

go to a Cheapo Department Store and buy some “Nice” clothes that you could ostensibly wear to a $15 an hour job.

Don’t Beat Yourself Up if you have the occasional Racist or Sexist Thought. Sometimes Stereotypes get invented for a reason.

Get NINE hours of sleep a night. Dr Ilardi says Paleo Man got about NINE hours of sleep a night. Dr Ilardi KNOWS!!!

If you have an Extreme Obsession with 18YOQTs, tell yourself, this is a gross exagerration of normal desires, Please God Release Me From This Living Hell.

Either throw out the objective on your resume, or change it drastically. rather than say, i want to work for this kind of company, say I want to apply my demonstrated skills of increasing revenue in Physical Therapy to This Company in the Physical Therapy field. I don’t f00king know, all that sh1t’s gay. Just make your objective SHORT and EXACT as f00k because you gotta beat out 100 other people for this one job, and some of them will be from harvard, hahahaha. f00king sh1tstains.

 

HYUGE 9000 WORD POST

(actually only 2500)

tues 7 16

Heh. I like to check the search terms in the stats that bring people here. great stuff. indicates that I Know My Audience Well. today was “lazy research assistant.” heh. that was haunting. I actually WAS one of those once.

My Professor was a REAL nice guy. I did a good thing by Reaching out to a Nice Professor, and he truly was Real Nice and not an 4sshole……and then shortly after I Sh4t The Bed, shirking my work, becoming a lazy research assistant, because I couldn’t CONTROL MY FEELS ABOUT GRILLS. (GURLS). DON’T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU.

Where I should have been Busting My 4ss for the Prof, and really “leveraging” the niceness of the Prof to get me into a Good Job Somewhere Anywhere, NO, I slacked off and gave up, because I couldn’t handle Romantic Rejection. DON’T DO THIS.

Did I mention I’ve been listening to NOTHING but The Grateful Dead for a week straight? “Touch of Grey” is a great song too, fits RIGHT in with all their old classics. They were playing it since 1982 BTW. FYI.

(1989)

When I was young, the Grateful Dead album EVERYBODY had was the “Skeletons in the closet” Greatest Hits CD. Heck this is a great place to start too! Even though it’s all Studio! It’s not like the dead sounded BAD in the studio!

* you know how hard you work and struggle and fight and thrash limbs and try not to drown and fight and grind and chip away at SKOOL? If you used about 33% of that Energy and Work and Fighting to Fix Your Loserness, then you would become a Winner and find skool, work, and luv easier!

* relates to my theory that we should teach 4 credit hour College Style Classes on how to Fix Your Loserness.

* WHILE keeping in mind that sometimes we need to Stop FIGHTING our “Depression” as Ajahn Brahm says. HOWEVER, I don’t think that means that we NECESSARILY need to STOP eating well, stop sleeping well, stop exercising, stop lifting, stop praying, etc.

* Because I think we can work to Fix our Laziness but it doesn’t HAVE to be Grueling, Draining, Fighting, it can be as “easy” as Reading A Book or Taking a WALK. Admitting that Reading Books can be REALLY HARD, but I find reading book specifically on the topic of Fixing Laziness is easier than reading a book on for example Computer Programming. Because it’s Super f00king Relevant to our lives and our immediate state of mind.

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I don’t usually like doing super long posts because who’s gonna READ a 9000 word post, and considering I would like to Help People. So I promise not to do this every day! I USUALLY try to keep it to 1000. Although 800 would be ideal bc 1000 is a little long!

Anyway there IS some GREAT stuff in today’s 9000 word post. GREAT stuff. WELL worth reading. Heh, Heh. Job tips, Life Stories, Feels. The usu solid gold stuff.

7 16

yeah that’s been my thing: hard to CONCENTRATE. Not like this is a NEW problem whatsoever! But it really sums it up nicely: can’t concentrate on schoolwork, can’t concentrate on long term plans, can’t concentrate on job search, can’t concentrate on reading or studying, because there is so much anger, confusion, and hopelessness about everything, and every little thing is hard as f00k and draining.  you don’t feel normal, don’t feel right.

So you say, what would a mature responsible adult do in this situation? And then go do it.

Today dropped off the application packet. Every god damn little thing. Not used to actually dropping off applications. So I said, WELL, OBVIOUSLY the BEST choice would be to hand deliver it to the person named. It gave a name. Anything to get them to remember you. don’t want to come all that way just to drop it off with “The Gatekeeper” at the front desk. But then I realized I didn’t have a great Spiel. Be lucky to have a 10 second spiel. Always been terrible at Spiels and Elevator Speeches. Struck out Three Times with that at the Job Fair. Be like, I hate everything but I’m smart, just gimme a 10 an hour Full Time Entry Level Job, I have a 120 IQ I Swear, I swear to god, you gotta help me, pleeeeeease, I don’t interview well but I DO do the job well. Maybe. And then I realized all of my clothes are kinda sh1tty. Wearing the same old clothes for years. REALLY gotta get new clothes, REALLY always been bad about shopping for Spiffy New Clothes Always. But I wasn’t gonna put on my Semi-Shoddy SUIT to drop off an application in 90 degree SuperHumid Weather. Though I would if I were actually working the job!

TLDR I asked the Gatekeeper for the person, said it was In Regards To the Job, they went back and checked, said they were not available, so I said thank ya very much and gave THEM my packet.

I put the Packet in a Manila Envelope. It was about 10 pages.

On the front of the envelope I put My Name, what It Was, and the person’s name. In hindsight I probably should have printed these on Avery Labels because that sends the signal that you know how to print labels. But I just printed it on paper, cut out the stuff, and taped it on with clear packing tape. Looked better than it sounds!

Protip: Learn CALLIGRAPHY or just real neat fancy Handwriting. My handwriting is not very professional looking, so I try to type everything. However, I would say, real fancy calligraphy would have also made a Positive Impact. Maybe. Definitely better than Everyday Chickenscratch!

Protip: All the people at your Current Job you would list as references, your new homework assignment is to actually ask them to write you a brief reference LETTER that you can use for All Jobs, and get them to send you the doc file so you can have it forever. Don’t even need to be sneaky about this. Be like I want to use this for various jobs in the future so just know I might be editing it to change the date, the position name, the company, so kinda make it a “Fill In The Blank letter.” And then just talk about what an awesome person I am.

Protip: This would prob only work if it’s An Underjob And Everybody There Knows It. If It’s a Upper Working Class Bigboy $10 an hour Fulltime Entry Level Bachelors Degree Job, your Superior might not like the idea of you Looking For Better Paying Work Elsewhere.

. go take a break buddy

.official virgin age meter

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However it’s still good to have references. Maybe LIE TO YOUR BOSS and tell them you are trying to……get nominated for Steering Committee At Church. That you’re Running For Unpaid Office. Church works. Or Boy Scouts, School Board, Kiwanis, Optimists, Elks, Moose, Masons, Church. MAYBE graduate school. That one could be risky. (Although If you ARE serious about going to Grad Skool, you WILL need Good, Relevant References.)

“HE’S SMART, HE JUST DOESN’T APPLY HIMSELF” is what they always said about you. APPLY YOURSELF. Well, actually, maybe they didn’t say that about you. They usually say that about High School Students. But because you got good grades in high school, they didn’t say you didn’t apply yourself. It wasn’t till College and Beyond that your Really Realized how much you weren’t applying yourself and how godawful that was.

Heh. This blog is especially intended for people who were Good in High School, but then REALLY Sh4t the Bed in COLLEGE. Became A Loser In College/University.

However if you became a loser in High School, well, I’m pretty welcoming, as long as you really “self-identify” with 30 year old kissless virgin wizard neet neckbeard r9k losers.

The type of person where people say, oh he started out so well, WHAT HAPPENED?

Well, a lotta things: bad habits, not applying yourself, not Engaging In School, not doing this, not doing that, more bad habits, laziness, procrastination, not caring, not adapting well to College, not adapting well to Life or Adult Life or even Late Adolescent Life really, a lotta things happened, lotta little things, maybe a few big things. And now you hate everything and can barely bring yourself to go out and buy clothes or talk to a College Counselor, and you try to trace it back. LET’S JUST ESTIMATE 18. Because even if you were angry and hateful and weird and nonnormal in high school, things didn’t get REALLLLY Bad until AFTER high school, when you went to college, as was expected for kids who did well in high school. THEN you ROYALLY F00ked up, and have been on that f00ked up road ever since.

Got off track, feel like you can’t get back on track. Or say you’ve been off track for 12 years – is it gonna take 12 years to get back on track? Heh so by age 42 you will be at the level of a Normalfag EIGHTEEN year old, hahahahahahahaha.

If you know these feels, this blog is for you!

I would say keep exercising, keep praying, keep Reaching Out To As Many PEOPLE PEOPLE PEOPLE as possible for HELP and then following up with them, and also try martial arts classes, practice small talk, find the cheapest shrink you can and go at LEAST once every two weeks, although once a week would be ideal, and also try DBSA “Depression” Support Group meetings. Heh. I would like to try one of those if I weren’t so Lazy, Stubborn, and Afraid. And stop making EXCUSES, hahahahahaha.

Sh1t. MAYBE continue taking brain-destroying SSRI meds until you’re no longer a LOSER. I have been on like 5 mg of Paxil a day for months, trying to rid my brain of this Poison, but at this point, I’d almost rather have a Broken, Poisoned Brain and Be A Winner, than have a Drug-Free Brain and be a total f00king LOSER. Cost Benefit Analysis!

So I might go up to the Minimum Effective Therapeutic Dose, cuz I can guarantee you, 5 mg is prob well below it.

Like if the “cost” of your permanently fried brain is, it’s chemically no longer plagued with hateful angry thoughts and it’s easier for you to concentrate, and the Undrugged brain is full of Hate, Anger, and Unconcentration, well, I’ll take the Drugged Brain any day! Because the price of Being A Loser is the deciding factor.

You can try quitting meds once you’re a Winner In Life. Like people with Good Jobs and Good Mates.

But if you can’t even get a Sh1tty job, can’t get even a sh1tty mate, well, maybe it’s time to start taking those brain-frying drugs. Like your brain isn’t ALREADY fried most of the day, unable to concentrate, hateful angry scared neurotic thoughts all day.

ok you can skip this because it’s Off Topic:

Movie Review: “Session 9”

You don’t have to read the movie reviews if you don’t want to! It’s just one of those rare times when I am not filled with negative feels and can write about something else! Can actually use my brain for something that’s not feels! But boy howdy don’t think this means I would or could do all the work it takes to become a Career Film Critic! Talk about tons of graduate school, schmoozing, unpaid internships, reading marxist books on theory and what have you. No Thanks!

Well this was one of the better Average Movies I’ve seen in a while. I stayed up late, til like 240 am, because I really wanted to watch a Scary Movie, it’s been a while. This movie was solidly entertaining. i enjoy solid entertainment in addition to Horror and Ridiculous 8 hour long Foreign Art Films. But solid entertainment is hard to find. usually will go to TV shows for this: arrested development, game of thrones, breaking bad. starting to get a little bored with star trek tng. taking break from arrested d.

plus when you have so many anger feel and can’t concentrate, you can’t even concentrate on a TV show or movie!

Session 9 was surprisingly well written and well acted. Even David Caruso was good. 2001. Hazmat company must clean asbestos out of an abandoned insane asylum in one week. While abandoned asylums are all the rage on your TV ghost adventures and stuff, back in the day, s9 asylum would have been considered real fresh. one of the more exciting things I did during my Wasted Youth was to sort of explore an abandoned asylum one night. indeed a scary setting.

heh. but what I liked even more was the Real Life Working Men concept of these Blue Collar Guys just Working for a Living. Contractors making Bids to Do A Job. Stuff Working Class Men used to do before they had to go to college to make a working class living. stuff elite college kids have no idea exists. REALLY liked the character whose Father was a Big Lawyer, and the son himself went to Law School on “THE ONE YEAR PLAN” then dropped out and became a failure and a disappointment and now he works here. Or this other guy that talks about everybody needs an “EXIT PLAN” because they don’t want to be working this crap job the rest of their lives. That one guy doesn’t read book JUST FOR FUN, going back to law school and become a Successful Lawyer is HIS Exit Plan. but why did he leave law school? how’s he gonna get back INTO law school?
(and there is a whole community of disgruntled Law Students out there, who probably have the Worst Student Debt of Any Student, like 500k to everyone elses 50k, and they can’t get a job as a paralegal. Do NOT go to LAW SCHOOL unless you go to a GOOD one and REALLY know how to Network. Although many lawyers are extraverted normalfags)

But these questions are not too important to the movie, rather, I liked that the movie included Multidimensional Characters like that. Not expecting.

Just the idea of the man owning his own cleaning company, he’s getting stressed out cuz now he has a new baby to take care of, and so he begins lowballing bids where he hadn’t before, just because he needs jobs. and here they do a lowball bid and have to work themselves ragged to finish the job in one week for a Sweeeeet $10 grand bonus (presumably split 5 ways?), when before it was estimated it would take 2 or 3 weeks.

So you figure they need to work 16 hour days at LEAST, heheheh. Which they did not seem to do. But yeah it is as much a Working Job Movie as an Abandoned Asylum Movie.

Not bad, not bad. Just didn’t really bring the horror. One scary scene, maybe two. ANNNDDD the ending was a little weird. It threatened to jump the shark but didn’t REALLY jump the shark. Which is ALL GOOD, since most movies you can pinpoint the moment the shark is officially jumped, and it’s usually before halfway through.

So, not bad. Not ragingly awesome though. It could have been, had it been scarier and maybe a different 5th act. Worth Watching Once(tm)!

INTRO pt 5: LAZINESS, DRUGS/ALCOHOL

heh may 18 2023

So after I drove away all women and nonwhites and white men who find Muh Racism APPALLING, heh, ok, now I can speak to the Real Hateful Neckbeards that Hate Everyone and Everything.

Continuing my Intro Posts. I break these up into about 1000 words because nobody wants to read more than 1000 words. moderateness.

I don’t like the WORD “depression” because it’s weak and gay and incomplete and confusing and misleading and ununderstandable, but it would be a reasonable search term to bring somebody here. Can’t suggest a better word though: morally lazy loser is one I like to use; soul cancer; soul death; soul crushing; despair is a great one. was reading about the sin of sloth ie LAZINESS and how it can lead to despair.

I am VERY interested in the idea of Laziness, and sometimes how it gets mixed up with what People (not me!) call “depression.” and virgins arguing “No I’m not lazy I’m DEPRESSED! No, he’s not depressed, he’s just LAZY!”

It’s hard to tell. Real hard to tell. I think rather than draw a line between them, we should acknowledge that yeah maybe there IS some laziness in there. But it’s so politically incorrect to talk about laziness.

The one book I found, “The Myth of Laziness” by Mel Levine, started out breddy good until I learned Levine was horrendously disgraced by allegations of molesting boys over like 30 years and then he killed himself. Innocent or not, I already convicted him in my mind.

So I have taken up the burden of writing about laziness. And I agree with Levine: NOBODY WANTS to be LAZY. Being Lazy does not Feeeeeel good.  The Problem of laziness is more complex & nuanced than Normalfags think. And I agree that we should not Morally Judge The Morally Lazy, hahaha.

So How To Fix Laziness would be another main goal of this blog.

Basically you sit around not wanting to DO anything, because nothing is worth it. It’s not worth it to do anything because everything you’ve tried before has failed. You feel you don’t have enough WORK left in you to work as goddam hard as it’s gonna take to succeed. Because you tried before and failed because you just didn’t work hard enough, and now you’re BURNT OUT and don’t want to, feel like you CAN’T try again. You’re done. FINISHED.

I know that feel, bro! all too well!

So Winners, even well-meaning winners, might say, oh well, going day to day, one day at a time, is no way to live life. you have to have LONG TERM GOALS.

I agree that Long Term Goals are GREAT, but I don’t poo poo One Day At A Time. What’s the alternative? Heh. Getting Drunk or f00ked up Every Day.

It is absolutely no surprise that Lazy Losers turn to Drugs and Alcohol. I myself used to drink like a bastard. Mostly binge drinking. But the binging went on too regularly and too long. Maybe from the ages of 16 to 26. Then I got a DUI and quit drinking Cold Turkey and still remain a Cold Turkey. Stone Cold Sober for X years.

Compared to how I was drinking prior to that, that is a pretty big accomplishment, and something I’m Rightfully sorta proud of, but it’s just Not Enough. I still have the Feels of Anger and Inadequacy and Laziness and Giving Up that tempted me to drink in the first place. Thankfully though, I’m not at all tempted to drink. Not drinking is EASY. I can go out the BAR and not want to drink. I am fully prepared to not drink at ALL for the rest of my LIFE, and this is not too terrifying.

Sometimes I do have DREAMS where I have drunk and THAT is terrifying, because I think “Oh Sh1t, X YEARS down the drain, I don’t even remember drinking, how did this happen, now my life is REALLY over” and then when I realize it’s just a dream I breathe a HUGE sigh of relief.

I was not an Everyday Drinker like Lots of Drinkers (well, I guess I DID have several Everyday periods), I would get terrible hangovers that lasted for days and made me more despairing, then wait a couple days, then on “The Weekend” or something I would get insanely drunk, sometimes Weekend-Long Benders. I am VERY thankful and happy to be out of all that. I just can’t go back to that, don’t want to. That is all the incentive to not drink that I need. No Thank You. That’s what drinking got me, so I can easily choose never to drink again.

The only way I would ever drink again, I told myself, was that if i Got My Life Together with a Good Job and a Good “Wife.” Then I might drink In Moderation. But since those two things seem impossible….

In contrast to Alcohol, I DO have a temptation to smoke Marijuana. I had a period during my drinking days where I smoked a lot of Marijuana. Chronically. EVERY DAY. Several times a day. Morning Noon And Night for like 2 years. Maybe as many as 3! When I did that it was enough to get me to cut back drastically on the drinking.

When I cut back on my MJ, THEN I upped the Drinking again, and Drinking became a bigger problem.

Mixing the two would almost always end in vomiting, or getting completely blacked out and raging and crazy.

MJ would make me VERY anxious, it’s amazing I kept doing it. I only really LIKED it when alone, or when with a small number of VERY good friends.

Anyway I’m tempted to use it again as an “aid” for physical exercise and music/movie enjoyment. But I know it’s prob a slippery slope. If someone offered to sell me some I would probably buy it. Hahahaha but I would not have a place to enjoy it because I cannot afford to move out of Home because my job doesn’t pay well because I got the wrong degree and because I am horrible at job searching and I have a horrible resume and terrible internships and graduated too long ago so thus I cannot get a Good Job and Move Out and Smoke Weed all day like a Weed Addict, like THAT is a good goal!

I am also open to the idea of using Psychedelics Timothy Leary style  for Medicinal Purposes, to help people with their lazy loserhood.

So I fully appreciate that you may be On Drugs or Alcohol. I might try to help you Quit it. But I can only speak for myself. I quit Drugs and Alcohol (other than the lingering DESIRE to smoke MJ, but I don’t act on it; have NO desire to ever drink again unless I have a Good Job and a Good Waifu) but, Awesome and Important and Essential and Necessary as Quitting Alcohol was, it’s STILL not enough. Necessary but not sufficient. I have to quit alcohol AND totally change my life.

So join me as I do that and help you totally change your life too.

And lemme make it perfectly clear: You SHOULD Quit alcohol at the very least, pref all drugs. because even if it doesn’t solve everything, you have NO HOPE of Fixing Yourself until you DO quit Drugs. And Alcohol is a Drug. I guess if you wanted to smoke weed like once a…every couple months that would be ok, but with Weed it’s SO easy to start doing it EVERY DAY, and THAT would be VERY BAD. Even once a week might be too much. Try once a month if you absolutely MUST. But the state you’re in, ANY drugs would be bad. Drugs are best enjoyed by Healthy Winner Normalfags, hahahaha, funny how that works.

INTRO pt 4: FEDORAS, RELIGION, LANGUAGE, IDENTITY, RACE, DISCLAIMERS

[

update may 2014: yep this is still the most popular page. pretty sure it’s that PICTURE why. or perhaps wizardchan or r9k has a permalink to this particular page. but this page for all intents and purposes is the Front Door to this blog.

i guess all the stuff here is pretty accurate, i’m still a little racist. i don’t mind other races when they behave peacefully and civilizedly. and how do we fix problems of racial disparity? make better schools for blacks? what is the best way to make such better schools?

i have no idea, these problems will NOT be fixed in our lifetimes, the best we can try to do is improve our own loser selves over our lifetimes. that would be good enough for me! Got to fix the self before you can fix society. make yourself gainfully employed, and in good health, and have good Relationships, before you can impose yourself upon others and tell them how to live, hahahaha.

But when you are an Unemployed Virgin Beta Omega Loser, larger social problems are a moot point, you have enough problems of your OWN to contend with. like wtf kind of force is it in yer brain, that makes you lazy, makes you give up, tells you not to try or work hard?

heh. at this time I would say start with the newer entries and work your way back. also I am not writing so much about gambling any more, as I have cut my own gambling WAY back. Gambling is probably not THE magic bullet. Banging 18 yo QTs is a MUUUUUUUUUUUUCH better magic bullet, but good luck pulling those QTs! However you know a good first step: BE MASCULINE!

]

Hello Friends, Welcome Back.

may 18 2013 heh i could do 5 in one day i am sure. i am on a roll here.

yeah i will talk more about all these topics, math, etc, but just trying to get a good introductory set of posts going here.

scheduling your time so you’re not doing nothing, thinking about negative stuff, would be good. like going for a walk for 20 minutes might be better for you than 20 minutes of JOB SEARCHING, O GOD. Might be, heck, I GUARANTEE it’s better, no matter how bad you NEED that job.

Religion may or may not be useful to you. I hate Fedora Atheists because they’re so liberal and smug and gay, but perhaps you’re soured on the Christian Church, which I guess might be fair. I will have to talk more about Religion later because there is a lot to say. I would just say for now, don’t be a smug Fedora Wearing Atheist Faggot and think you’re above it. besides, if you’re REALLY Desperate for some relief from being a Lazy Loser, you will not be above getting down on your hands and knees and BEGGING to some sort of god! more later.

fedoraatheisttrain

I am writing mainly for MEN, specifically kissless virgin omega male types. IMHO Women can become lazy losers too, but IMHO they are more likely to become Borderline or Cluster B or Bipolar than just simply “depressed.” Plus it’s a lot easier for women not to be kissless virgins because guys are always throwing themselves at women. You know this is true.

Being a Man who has been unable to get his Heterosexual Wants filled gave me a lot of Angst, it probably gives YOU a lot of Angst, in a way that even Well-Meaning Women cannot relate to or understand. Just be yourself, just be honest, etc.

It led me to reading a lot of Game stuff, Pick Up Artist Stuff, how to seduce wimmin. Which led me to MRA stuff, led me to MGTOW stuff, and now I’m into some different stuff too hehehe.

But I can boil down all the YEARS of study I’ve done on How To “Get” Women, all the trillions of pages I’ve read on Heterosexual Relations, How Not To Be A Hugless Virgin, and it basically ALL boils down to: BE MASCULINE. BE MASCULINE. That’s ALL it is. Women like a MASCULINE MAN. Not a Feminized Wishy Washy Indecisive Sensitive NiceGuy Faggot.

I also use the word faggot and fag a lot. I would suggest you too not be afraid of using these words. It is sometimes GOOD to be angry and hateful. You KNOW sometimes you just want to call some 4sshole a FAGGOT but then you hold back because you think, well, My Waifu Gurl would disapprove of me using Hateful Homophobic Rhetoric like that! and then you hold back and think you’re more educated and enlightened. Might as well break out the fedora right now, FAGGOT!

Obviously I’m not using the term as Homophobic Hate. More like anti-Normalfag hate. the way everyone on 4chan calls everyone fags ALL THE TIME.

As far as ACTUAL Gays. I used to be in LUV with gays, I identified with their Oppression and Misunderstoodness and supported them whole heartedly, and I still appreciate how Gay People can become Cripplingly Clinically Depressed because their Religious Families would disown them.

But I will be writing this from a Heterosexual Perspective. Besides, lots of Gays end up going to College or Cities and “Exploring Their Sexuality.” And I am writing mainly for Heterosexuals who are so socially awkward and unmasculine that they cannot fulfill their Heterosexual Urges.

I am also Pretty Conservative, but I will TRY not to talk about that TOO much.

I am also a White Man, and I have strong beliefs about RACE, but I will try not to talk about those right now. I think that  becoming more Racially Aware might be a Good Thing for Lazy Losers. Sometimes. I know it helped me.  Plus I think Whites have more of a tendency to become depressed because they turn their anger inward, while nonwhites turn their anger outwards. on AVERAGE.

So While my Intended Audience is White Men, I also think that Women and Nonwhites can benefit from My “Advice.” The advice is pretty general, sometimes. except when I’m telling men to try to be more MASCULINE, or for whites to really get into Being White. Then OBVIOUSLY that will not apply to women or nonwhites.

But yeah. I do think we are living in a Poisonous Culture where White Men are especially vulnerable to the type of NEET Lazy Loser Depression which I am trying to help you with. Of course, You might agree we live in a Poisonous Trashy Culture but it doesn’t cause THAT. Heh. Rest assured I don’t think that’s the ONLY thing it causes, so I probably AGREE with you 90%!

But yeah, for any Moral or Freethinking or “Red-Pilled” person, white or nonwhite, man or woman, or Culture CAN be pretty soul-crushing and negative.

Just saying that I am a White Man, I’m mainly writing FOR White Men, and it’s PROBABLY White Men who would identify with and benefit most from this. Say 10 years from now scientists do a study and find that I’ve helped Black Women more than I’ve helped White Men. I wouldn’t be all butthurt as long as I helped SOMEBODY.

Basically I will TRY to leave my MOST controversial Racial and Conservative and Gender stuff on my OTHER blog, which I will not divulge here!

What about Liberals? I didn’t tell LIBERALS to stay away like I did with Women and Nonwhites, haha! What about Liberal White Men? Yep I think I could help them too.  I could probably help a Liberal White Man more than a Conservative Asian Woman. Come on. Let’s not be retarded. I was just giving a FULL DISCLOSURE.

Basically just to say that Racism is held up as The Worst Thing A Person Can Possibly Be in this day and age, but that I think that A Little Racism is healthy, and you should not be ASHAMED of your own “Racist” thoughts. Embrace Your Inner Racist!

That and I think Whites are especially likely NOT to embrace their Inner Little Racist. So go ahead, do it, I don’t mind, heck, I’m ENCOURAGING it. I’m PRETTY sure you’re not going to go out and burn crosses and lynch blacks and suicide bomb jews or muslims.

TL,DR: Whites are My Team and Male is my Gender,and White Males will prob benefit most from this, but if women or nonwhites find it helpful, I’m not gonna stop them. But I am biased towards my own Home Team.