sat dec 2

apr 20

the fuhrers bday hahaha. maybe this blog will be shut down by dec 2 because of all the racist stuff ive been doing hehe.

anglin case on anglins local news in ohio. roosh v writing article on anglin case and pretty much naming the J and taking anglins side. i get a popup on return of kings that says “DEUS VULT!!!” i guess roosh is now pro-hwyte alt right hahahaha.

ok kalki was the 12th avatar of vishnu or some shit or was it krishna? and so savitri devi said AH was like kalki. the DESTROYER OF FILTH. I can really identify with that. i see DESTROYING FILTH as my mission too.

420 day. happy bday fuhrer hahaha. but i just thought. its kinda weird jooish marxist countries like UK and germany and sweden havent legalized MJ yet. i mean its more legal in the US than it is in the UK.

the only job openings are for jobs SO SHITTY, like being a PATSY SCAPEGOAT FALL GUY BAGHOLDER to sit there and take abuse from angry customers your company has screwed, jobs that are like oh god theres no way i can survive even one day of this. then you stick it out in a job like that for 2 or 3 years and maybe you can move on to something better if you are a top 20% performer and not some average asshole.

its called PAYING YOUR DUES hahahaha.

and its harder than the military and jail combined. i honestly dont know why more people dont k themselves to get out of it. or join the military or intentionally go crime to get sent to jail.

i dont want to go to jail because its for scumbag negros and i dont want to get raeped in the ass.

but to sit there and take abuse all day and pathetically try to do something you dont know how to do, thats kinda like being raeped in the ass hahahaha. no not quite but it does put you on EDGE ALL DAY LONG. then when you go home youre on edge too, becasuse youre WORRIED about being on edge all day TOMORROW.

oh youre just figuring this out at age 30 hahahaha

no i was always sort of aware and afraid of it hahaha but didnt actually live it until somewhat recently. now im even MORE afraid of it!

how do peopel survive?

they become raging alcoholics and pill poppers!

then how do they keep their jobs? those bad habits will give you a hangover and affect your work performance so that youre not even AVERAGE anymore, but BELOW average!

some guy was on return of kings commenting he didnt agree with daily stormers anti  race mixing views, because he totally enjoyed banging his young indian GF who was “TWO STANDARD DEVIATIONS ABOVE AVERAGE”, when he had NEVER pulled a hwyte gurl that hot. This white guy could pull indian gurls that were HOTTER than the hwyte gurls he could pull. and Raceless Hotness was the ONLY thing he cared about.

i thought it was a little autistic. and showed that HE had no connection to his own race. and i say this as someone who also appreciates that young indian gurls can be quite good looking!

and if i could pull a good looking one, i would DEFINITELY bang.

but i would HOPE i wouldnt throw my own RACE under the bus like that guy did.

i mean im not surprised to see this Hedonistic, Pornified approach at RETURN OF KINGS!!!! I should be happy they are even turning towards a better path, being less degen. and i suppose i am. i mean these degens get a lot RIGHT about the nature of women, and how to pull women. they just have their long term goals fooked up.

Normie Jobs are so INCREDIBLY STRESSFUL, thats why SO MANY people are on benzos. xanax and valium. i never took a benzo till i got a horrendously stressful, ie normal, job. and then i was like doc you gotta give me somethign for this.

too bad i cant get MJ the same way hahaha.

i mean i would have to lie and say i had back pain. i dont really want to LIE to doctors. unless I KNEW the doctor was gonna write me a MJ rec without needing to see any medical records.

i also wouldnt LIE to a doctor to try to get opiates. Not really interested in opioids hahahaha. i mean if i could get a huge supply for cheap, yeah sure. but those things are expensive af. a pill of oxycontin you pay 1 dollar for at the pharmacy costs like 40 dollars on the street. fact. so its no suprise people can spend 1000 dollars a day on opioids. the mystery is where they get the money. they switch to HERON because HERON is CHEAPER than Oxycontin!!!!

poor georgie boy. i hope he comes back in 6 months and has good news. i think he really was/is a good guy. i dont want to watch any other forever alone, “TFL” types.  i mean its a very black pill world to explore. i dont really WANT to explore it. im not even sure how i started liking george. but it just happened. i will miss him and I hope the best for him. i wouldnt mind meeting him some day.

there is a whole internet full of foreveralones, see r/foreveralone, /r9k/, bunch of youtubers in that vein, and i just dont want to go down that road and read that stuff, i cant even read MGTOW stuff. reading hwyte power stuff is about 14333333333333333 times more positive and white pillng hehehe.

that deserves repeating hehehe. yeah i have whatever those losers have, laziness and patheticness and “untreated despair”, but being around people like that whining about it is JUST AWFUL. read hwyte power stuff instead, you will feel better about yourself. honestly better.

so what is this blog? im not sure but I do NOT consider myself part of the “FA Community.” I dont read any of that shit and I recommend that YOU do NOT read that shit. George is literally the ONLY “FA” person I liked. and i suspect he was sympathetic to WP hahaha. i mean it will CURE you FA, because you realize you’re never really ALONE, you are part of a beautiful RACE.

seeing if there are any “resources” on “depression” at DS BBS:

https://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/black-pilled-af/95777

https://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/tfw-tism/99559

ok hahaha

https://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/how-do-i-stop-being-a-wagecuck-and-become-a-neet/96884

QUOTE ” Start looking into collecting SSI. Get some shrink to say you have crippling depression or autism or whatever and can’t hold down a job. Get a lady doctor if you can, trust me, they’re suckers for a sob story. ”

sheeeeeeeeeeeit every so often i get this fear that because i have SUCH a hard time with the Normie Adult World Of Work, that PROVES I am DISABLED and should get DISABILITY NEETBUX because I LITERALLY CANT HOLD DOWN A NORMIE JOB. and THAT feels REAL bad man.

“loneliness is failed solitude” ooooo good one hehehehe. i mean im thankful to appreciate and enjoy being alone, i dont really feel that LONELY, until I happen to interact with other people, and them im like, dam i am awkward af, i dont know how to interact with people, its much less stressful being alone and not being reminded of muh social awkwardness, no wonder i dont have any friends and am terrible with women, hahahaha.

anyway the people on a hwyte power forum will have a MUCH better discussion about despair and trying to beat it, than the same OP on a FA type forum.

i mean this is THE BLACK PILL. no joke. all that FA stuff is SO black pill that they stop realizing how black pill it is. that is a HORRIBLE, tragic way to live life. I wouldnt say its inherently jood like porn……rather its an inherently hwyte reaction to a jood world. you become SPIRITUALLY SICK. like GLR’s SPIRITUAL SYPHILIS.

i mean theres several kinds of that too. where you GIVE IN to the degeneracy, and then where you just want to cry butthurt tears about the degeneracy, you know its bad, you know better than to actively pursue it, you KNOW its bad, thank GOD, but you feel absolutely powerless to fight it, to DO anything about it, and feel like a weak loser who has wasted your whole life, and youll never be tough or strong or courageous enough to make the changes in your like you NEED to make in order for anything to get better. for you to become a normie adult making 28k a year, working FT, being mentally TOUGH enough to Hold Down A Job, finding a decent woman, having children, being a good father.

mark steyn on tucker carlson right now. tucker is becoming a meme on DS so i might as well check him out. he is pretty good. and mark steyn is a great speaker, i have enjoyed listening to him speak for years, even if he is a BASIC BITCH joo lover neocohen hahahahahaha. but he still is a great speaker and we would all do well to listen to him and try to speak like that. be a good ORATOR.

AH was obviously a great orator but I dont speak german at all. so whos a good english language orator. GLR was pretty good. the national action in darlington guy was great. mark steyn is good even though he is not the least bit alt right.

spencer? he could be better. his voice is still kinda gay. but i think he can get better.

myself, i am horrible at speaking. publicly OR privately.

https://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/fake-news-journalist-luke-obrien-trying-to-frame-political-activist-andrew-anglin-as-russian-agent/100472

anglin confesses every piece of dirt his enemies could possibly dig up on him. i have a mancrush on him and think he is an interesting guy and would like to read an autobiography by him. or listen to him tell his life story in 4 hours of podcast hahaha.

i will prob get this thing shut down by wordpress just for LINKING to daily stormer. it is easily one of the most badgoy sites on the entire internet. its really a miracle its managed to stay up for so long.

apr 21

http://www.nytimes.com/projects/census/2010/explorer.html

use this to help you find a place to live that is over 90% hwyte. i was surprised my area is lower 80s. and it still seems pretty good. my concerned is that arabs and albanians will be counted as hwyte.

yeah, pretty sure ARABS are counted as HWYTE. so be careful with this map.

im sure jooz are counted as hwyte but it might be good to live around middle class jooz because they will preach diversity but want to live in 90%+ hwyte areas where it is safe from nonwhyte crime and violence.

i should probably go to Hippie Drug Gathering where all the gurls do drugs and offer themselves up freely, like antifa gurl. of course you have to take huge precautions, but at least you would be banging young girls who are hopefully 7/10 at least. and really solidify your view that damn, all women really are disgusting whores who need to be physically restrained by BRUTE STENGTH, BEFORE they INEVITABLY BECOME disgusting whores who go to hippie gatherings and bang strangers.

meet up with the old friend today. expectations are managed beforehand. ideally he wouldnt drink at all. i prob wouldnt be too pissed if he drinks MODERATELY. i WILL be pissed if he gets SLOPPY drunk, and prob even MORE pissed if he wants me to blow in his damn car breathalyzer. uhhh that thing is in your car for a REASON. Yes I KNOW LE is just a bunch of jooish zog who Generate Revenue by arresting tons of people at .10 BAC. but in your case, you had way more than .10 BAC and have a legit drinkign problem. people like you are the reason they invented car breathalyzers. how the hell do you get to WORK then. you see me once in 6 months and cant even not drink before going out to a restaurant?

well MAYBE he will be on good behavior tonight. i hope he is. shit i’ll go to the jooish hooters breastaurant if he just doesnt drink for one god damn night.

i mean this is what a real drinking problem looks like. that asking a person not to get SLOPPY, RAGING, BLACKOUT drunk on ONE night out of 6 MONTHS is a hard bargain.

shit you can start drinking when I LEAVE at 11pm at the latest.

oh your wife is out of town for the weekend, shit thats gonna be the perfect excuse for him to get raging drunk all weekend too. so he doesnt have his Controlling Wife complaining about him drinking. Are You Drinking? Have You Been Drinking? When you went to the restaurant, did you drink? when you went outside, did you drink? when you went downstairs, did you drink?

and then him being obviously too drunk to speak and staggering back and forth, oh no i havent had anything to drink at all.

probably i havent been clear enough from the start that I dont want to see you drinking at all while I am here tonight. just do me that favor because i have known you like 19 years. you can drink yourself stupid when i leave.

and yeah seeing a person like that with a serious drinking prob makes me never want to drink again. because i wasnt quite that bad, but i could have totally gotten that way if i had kept drinkign for years.

i mean hes right in the middle of it, of course hes not gonna have a good perspective on it! of course hes not thinking clearly!

well they say you gotta try ang fail 9 times if you really want to quit a bad habit like drinking. or being a lazy loser neet virgin foreveralone apparently hahahaha.

anglin admitted to doing drugs as a degen youth. how much drugs did he do? well i know he was charged with MJ possession. pretty minor. Kinda wish he’d write a book about his life up to age 25 or so. living in a jungle commune in the phillippines? INTERESTING!

living in CHINA? INTERESTING! sounded like he was able to bang hwyte gurls as well as azn gurls while he was there. so was he teaching english? doing a church missionary thing? he’s not really religious atm but i thought his family was.

i KNOW he’s not my buddy pal frand, but I would be very open to that if I knew him IRL hahahaha. NO I am not gonna STALK him!!!!! i only semi stalk people on the INTERNET ONLY and only when it is a woman i fancy and thats a sure sign I should be talking to her IRL instead of daydreaming about her.

and then WANTING to internet stalk them after they dump me, and feeling terrible, but courageously managing to fight that temptation.

so yeah im really not a yuge stalker of anybody hahahaha. i am pretty good at finding people on the internet though.

but not NEAR as good as 4chan, they can dox antifa who are wearing MASKS. like the shit eating pervert who punched spencer, and the white antiwhite Ethics Professor who hit people with bike locks in berkeley. and the antifa gurl moldylocks was totally doxed within hours, but she wasnt wearing a mask. but how did 4chan do it???? especially the people with MASKS? they do it based on their EYES which I dont know how that is bulletproof evidence. not that I am DEFENDING these awful ANTIFA!!!!! im just saying, is it enough to get that shitty adjunct instructor fired?

ok. 1% vs 4% milkfat cottage cheese. which one tastes better, lets find out hahaha.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edgar_Steele

dont forget about this guy. pro-hwyte attorney, something we need a lot more of. i know OF one out in the real world at the moment, fully doxed and all, and it’s honestly kind of suspicious how he HASNT been set up yet. how has he managed to fly under the radar???!!?!?!?!

http://www.germanvictimsDOTcom/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/Defensive-Racism-By-Edgar-J-Steele.pdf

check out his famous book defensive racism,  i should read this NOW

hmm went to jail for conspiring to k his wife, thats kinda sleazy. i mean im assuming shes a sleazebag too who wanted to divorce him and take 90% of his money, which I could understand might make a person entertain the hypothetical notion, but theres still no excuse to k your wife. unless she is coming at you with a gun trying to k you and you are doing self defense.

welp gonna meet this friend here in 88 minutes. little nervous about that. maybe I will take a valium hehe. seriously. so if I did that, would that give him license to drink?

actually i could probably tolerate NORMAL moderate drinking, like average normies do. go to the bar and have 3 or 4 drinks. but he doesnt do that. he gets SO drunk that he cant even have a conversation, just mumbling incoherently, and then passes out raging drunk. you were this bad 15 minutes ago, you clearly snuck off and chugged some straight vodka or something. thats the thing I really dont like. that and making me blow into the car. at that point im like this is ridiculous, i’ll just drive.

he doesnt have any of the guilt or shame i had, where i was like i dont WANT my friends to SEE me like this! how shameful!!!

apparently now DS forum is closed to new people. you can read it but cant register. not sure how new people sign up. havent heard anything about invites or vetting.

ok leaving in 12 minutes. i will take a valium before leaving. i have historically been bad about standing up for muh self, like, do me a favor and just dont drink. dont make me blow into the car. dont get so drunk you are mumbling incoherently. i only ask those three things. but that is my line and i will not be happy if you cross that line. boundaries. hehehe. and when you cross that line, i get unhappy, and that is why i am not springing to hang out with you all the time. because i am disgusted by your extreme drinking problem.

USE YOUR WORDS hahahahaha.

however it is true i am a prickly pear and i am TERRIBLE about maintaining contact with people. that is a FACT.

but when people contact me, i usually respond to them and hang out with them even.

would i let him drink if he had an MJ card and agreed to use it to buy me MJ? PROBABLY YES hahahahaha. i really dont think he does, in fact that whole hypothetical is ridiculous.

 

 

Advertisements

THE WQ

apr 1

had a not fun dream which featurely That Woman prominently. there was this prostitution section at a mall or something where the hookers had little rooms and you could look at them before signing up. like a brothel or red light district i guess. to my horror i found her in there. being a hooker. she still looked great, except now she had some shitty tattoos on her nice white body where before she had none. i talked to her for a little bit but couldnt bring myself to “hire” her. i came back the next day and was more determined to “hire” her but i guess she wasnt in that day. i talked to one of her Clients who also really liked her, because she was the best fook ever, she did EVERYTHING and was so GIVING and enthusiastic.

i recall one image of her bending over with her beautiful long hair going over her beautiful white skin which was now covered in white trash tattoos and i was like welp those tattoos are a shame, but i still want her. i am not over her.

then i woke up at 5 am and was like welp that sucks. i still want her. i am not over her.

andrew anglin is right. women are like children. i bet if i contacted her NOW with enough confidence and charisma, i could meet up with her and bang her and ideally make her my waifu. i could play this game just right and live with her happily ever after. hopefulyl she doesnt have any shitty tattoos or any damn KIDS, and hasnt been with TOO many black guys in the past 2 years. i bet she still looks good and has nice hair and nice skin and nice legs.

i didnt want to go back to sleep because i felt i would go right back into that dream. but i also kinda wanted to “see her” again. but i knew this would bother me all day. so i laid awake and worried about it for a while and said welp ITS JUST A DREAM, yes it sucks, but it doesnt mean i’m not getting over her, or that i’m not 80% over her, in a few days, i’ll barely remember this, and NO i should NOT contact her, or look her up on the internet. fook no. do NOT do that.

then i got back to sleep pretty well, and no more dreams of her hahaha. thank god.

but yeah. just that lingering thought that if i came at her NOW like a totally super masculine tough guy, i could probably “win” her. and i was tempted to play that act. but i could only play that act for so long and then she would dump me and i would be heartbroken again.

and wa wa wa i will never WANT a woman as much as this again. and this kind of WANTING, yeah its “just” a chemical drug, but it totally effectively bonds people together, makes commitment possible, and ideally you want to MARRY and have CHILDREN with someone you get that chemical for…..and if you dont…..should you have children with them? i mean its clear many people do anyway.

well you can still be a good parent even if you dont like your wife hahahahaha. but your wife has to still be willing not to be a hostile bitch to you, esp in front of the children.

thankfully i got a few more hours of decent sleep and no more dreams about HER, that helped.

heh that darn article. maybe it got me thinking i could “win her back” after all thsi time, if I just came back as a total tough guy, and never let the mask slip. it would be risky, but its a risk worth taking right? i mean she is the last woman i will ever luv right? hahahahaha. what do i have to lose?

now in the light of day i can thankfully see, nope not a good idea. btu right after I woke up from that darn dream, yeah i was tempted. oh i’ll take her back even if she is a literal prostitute.  she has a spell on me.

then i thought it might be good to go to an actual hooker. shit go to a FEW.

yeah it is troubling the thought i should try to contact her, present a totally different face to her, act like i am a total tough guy, that would be a enough to fool her, and maybe i could fake it till i make it long enough for her to become loyal to me.

i mean i’m gonna have to do this with ANY woman ANYWAY, faking it till i make it as a masculine tough guy. not just her. but HER i have actual feelings for, i want to be with! she actually MEANS something to me!

rational response: if ANY young qt gurl is NICE to me and shows Sweet Feminine Warmth and Interest in me, I would very well get feelings for her TOO. basically she was acting in a way that ANY woman can act – sweet and nice and kind and friendly. that wasnt unique to HER. its just a huge TRIPLE WHAMMY to get that from a cute young hwyte gurl who is fairly secsually INNOCENT.  IE, a low-number woman.  and then she continues to be nice to you for a few years and you get to know her and you see she isnt a total destructive degen baby monster.

maybe the dream was just a grim, totally unfunny april fools joke. note: april fools jokes are SUPPOSED to be FUNNY. not morale-destroying hahaha.

sheeeit the mudshark thread on DS forum i replied to and was scared to look at for fear of people calling me a untermensch race traitor phaggot, well i learned i got at least 10 likes on my post, and also the thread was REMOVED so you cant even read it, prob cuz it got too controversial, but i HOPE they didnt attack the principled hwyte man who was trying to teach his mudshark white young female employee a valuable life lesson about not being a dirty mudshark. stop now before its too late. maybe he got attacked for being a WHITE KNIGHT and they MAN SHAMED him hahahaha. which would be bad and worthy of shutting down the thread.

read a book on how to train a very catlike dog. or better yet, how to train a CAT. then you will be able to TRAIN women.

anglin’s women thread is growing and growing. somebody posted the picture of him with his qt blonde GF. her hair his covering her face so she is not doxxed, but clearly she is attractive, and he is looking smug, rightfully so. i am suspicious that she is a trifling thot and dumped him and broke his heart! maybe he didnt TRAIN her well enough, maybe he didnt pick a righteous enough woman, but god damn, i just hate that men have to do 99% of the work and women only 1%, or else the man is a shameful loser. can’t women do 25% of the work? thats all I’m asking.

i dont EXPECT them to do 50% of the work or even 40%. but 25%??? COME ON. YOU CAN DO THAT MUCH. EVEN A 14 Year old gurl could do that much.

the danger here is that i am convincing myself to contact her. i cant come up wiht a good reason NOT to. i have nothign to lose. well, other than i will be devastated when she dumps me again . yeah but that will be my FAULT because women have no FAULT or RESPONSIBILITY ever. they one dump you if you let them get away with it and dont TRAIN them properly.

stupid god damn DREAM making me even THINK contacting HER is a remotely good idea. shit. fook. just wait a couple days and i will be back to “normal.” hehehe.

i say just try to bang women as quickly as possible, and when you do, YOU dump THEM, because you dont want a SLUT who bangs quickly as the mother of your children, you want a decent woman. but by all means bang her 500 times so you get more natural at being physical and confident with women. that can only HELP you in the long run. which is maybe why i need to meet casual sluts from okcupid, or hookers from the erotic review.

shit i desperately WANT another woman to REPLACE her and break this CURSE she has on me, and i worry this will never happen. well then I’ll just be cursed again, is that really any better? YES, because its NOT HER! the memory of HER is like an evil jooish parasite in muh brain! there was more bad than good and I wish I could FORGET IT ALL. even the good. because the GOOD WASNT WURF IT.

there was more bad than good and i wish i could forget the good. there was a decent amount of good though. but a fookton of bad.

http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/dear-men-who-wish-to-be-allies-to-women-12-things-you-need-to-know/95757

anyway there was a time wheni was having like 3 dreams about HER a week. but the shitty thing about this dream is that it proves i’m not fully over her, and that i could still totally RATIONALIZE the idea of contacting her. i WONT, but.

i mean shit. this was TRVE LUV. OF COURSE it takes a LONG time to get over. AT LEAST 2 YEARS.

BUt yeah i thought she CARED about me more. thats all hahaha. near the end it was like she didnt care at all. when things were good it seemed she CARED about me quite a bit. I don’t mind being Cared About by a Nice Person who I cared about too!

oh well its been over for 2 years and i hate all women nao hahaha its all part of THE PROCESS. TRUST THE PROCESS.  would LUV some MJ though. LUV LUV LUV.

i dont think i would have gotten the Luv Drug Chemical Oxytocins and Vasopressins and Dopamines and Endorphins if That Woman had not been ATTRACTIVE. if she were UGLY, i don’t think anything would have happened. i wish she had jsut been ugly! she had kinda a horse face but any man would have found her attractive, if perhaps “a bit plain.” but then again, a bit plain is my TYPE if there ever was one!!!

a little plain, but not UGLY.

and believe me, many women are on the ugly side of plain!

anyway. right or wrong (probably wrong hahaha) i had deep feelings for her and that was the truth. they were not logical, but they were REAL, and by GOD is it taking FOREVER for them to go away, because that is the reality of these feelings. that’s NORMAL.

it didnt matter that she didnt care about me, all that mattered was that she was young and purty and a halfway decent person and that we knew each other. i mean if i hadn’t KNOWN her for 3 years then she would just be like some random young qt gurl I didnt know.

anyway who cares. just hope i dont have a dream about her tonight.

i mean really this is just normal. normies go through this too. Only its maybe only 60% as painful hahaha. what do they do? they DRINK and bang SLUTS. i cant really do either of those.

http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/mudshark-and-retard-trolling-with-ya-main-goy-heilkek88/95052/16

this has the potential to get really good, the kid doesnt seem too sharp but he has some balls ahahaha. anyway you can just ask these sluts how many partners they have had. the 20 year old gurl said 4.

thats really not TOO bad!!!!! I mean I normally would allow a max of 2 by 20 for a marriageable gurl but a fat slut on POF, 4 by 20, damn I would have thought 8 to 10 by 20 at LEAST!

chris cantwell is doing a livestream in blackface pretending to be a black guy. his stock is going up in my market hahahaha. i guess he was banned from doing streams on youtube so now he is on this thing called ustream. looks like varg is going from youtube to this thing called vidme. hope that works out for him, i mean he’s entitled to make money from his vidyas, no reason not to!

sent a 5 dollar dnation to DAILY STORMER because i donate to him once every 3 months and apr 1 is the start of another 3 months.

there is like 4600 dollars in his wallet right now. hopefully that will keep DS going for a few more months hahahaha.

apr 2

no dreams about that woman last night thank GOD.

sunday. nice sunny day. went for powerwalk at 11am, try to go for another.  weird irritated and congested feeling in throat which not sure if “allergies” to possible pollen from the Coming Spring, or if it is a Wirus of some sort.

Doing Just Sunday Things namely charging everything that can be charged; triming beard down to level 2.

if you slap a woman open handed in the face like sean connery or steve mcqueen in the movies, that’s probably ok. but to fully beat the shit out of a woman, thats probably never ok ahahha. no closed hand, no prolonged beatings. just one light slap on the face, open hand. it’s more SYMBOLIC than anything. you arent trying to physically hurt her. again, I am much much more comfortable with spanking. there you dont have to be so gentle. you can make it hurt a little. how much long term damage is a spanking going to cause anyway. now i’m not talking about WHIPPING them with a cane or bullwhip with 20 severe lashes that would break the skin like the black slaves in the movies have horrible scars on their backs. I’m just talking about 10 good smacks with your open hand.

i fully intend to do this and I fully expect it to work WONDERS. if i could have spanked that woman it would have worked wonders. but we never even hung out. getting in a room alone with her for 5 minutes was too much to ask.

also you should never ever do any spanking or slapping in public. that is some negro bullshit. i mean unfortuantely there ARE white trash men who BEAT and ABUSE their women, and unfort these women are too fooked up to leave these men, because they dont realize all they really need is a spanking, not having their head smashed against the wall. god damn. you think sean connery or steve mcqueen did that shit hahaha. nope. the thought should HORRIFY you as it does me. just one mild slap on the face to cool her off when she is starting to get hysterical. its easier to do quickly and tactically than a spanking, which is a long formal procedure and ritual. very time intensive. slap first, spank later.

also if i had slapped that woman i dont think it would have helped. dont slap a woman until you have fooked her at least 10 times hahahaha.

maybe practice slapping her in the face while you are spanking her, if, like me, you are much more comfortable with the idea of spanking than slapping. i mean slapping just seems much closer to “ABUSE.” it’s really NOT if done the right way: just one time, open hand, not super hard, again, it’s a SYMBOLIC gesture.

but would it have really ever helped me? well i might have been able to spank the sluts from 12-13 years ago because they let me get Physical with them. but still it was damn near impossible to hang out with them, spend time with them. i spent barely any time with them, barely got to know them at all before i was dumped hahaha. so basically no, spanking or slapping wouldnt have been the magic bullet there, because i didnt even know them LONG enough to get AWAY with spanking them!

The Female Question. The Women Question. it is god damn important and a good gateway into 1433. better that it leads to 1433 than to mgtow! which it easily can!

basically even by traditional patriarchial 1433 standards, i’ve never “known” a women well enough to be able to slap her hahaha.

well i guess you would be more entitled to spank than slap a woman you were just “casually dating.” just start off incorporating it into the degen casual secs. then once she likes you enough to hang out with you once a week you can slowly start Sl4pping her if she mouths off hahahaha.

i am not advocating VIOLENCE, the slapping is NOT VIOLENT.

spanking is a great idea….but it never would have helped me! damn!

basically i am just needily begging to hang out until i get dumped hahahaha. meaning they dont want to hang out any more ever again hahaha.

so how the hell do you make women want to hang out with you? BE MASCULINE. BE TOUGH. BE A MAN. at least FAKE being a man, that’s good enough for Most Women anyway hahahaha. maybe focus on asian or black girls hahahahahahaha no i kid. dont do that.

but yeah spanking is great and i would luv to get a chance to use it, but you cant just use it on casual broads. i mean you got to have enough skill to pull a woman in the first place.

but yeah. you need something else to keep you STRONG than some loving waifu at home to cuddle you and build you up. if she is your Rock, then she is gonna LEAVE you because you are WEAK. dont show her that weak side. better for you to find some private spot and cry like a bitch alone. or maybe run home and cry to your mama. literally! crying in front of your male friends is not recommended. maybe your female friends? hahahahaha. if they are totally ugly in every way, maybe. how about a shrink, or better yet, a PRIEST.

heh there is a guy on DS who makes AA look like a white knight woman lover hahahaha. he is complaining about the “feminist mods” and pretty much asking to get banned. i guess they DO ban people from DS and also remove threads. they delete threads pretty regularly. why not just lock them? probably because there is some suggestion of violence and that ruins the whole thread. how about just delete those posts and lock the thread? because i guarantee some of those threads were decent. some of muh favorite threads eventually got deleted.

so yeah i guess if you are having tough times and feel stressed and weak…..DONT LET YOUR WOMAN SEE YOUR WEAKNESS OR SHE WILL LEAVE YOU. go cry to your:

  1. mother
  2. priest
  3. pay a shrink to listen to you cry
  4. find a private place and cry into a Teddy Bear ahahahahahahaha i’m not even joking.

whats the difference between a woman and a teddy bear? you can cry to a teddy bear and it wont LEAVE YOU hahahahahahaha.

then go lift some weights and only go back to your woman when you are prepared to put on your tough guy face and fook her hard.

i wish the women had more tolerance for weakness, but they JUST DONT, so ADAPT or GET DUMPED. There are other people and things you can show your weakness towards.

traditional catholics say that Adoration/Exposition of the Host is a magic bullet for them. that it turns lukewarm pvssies into crusading warriors for christ. basically getting up and going to church at 6 am before your Job and kneeling in front of the Host.  mother teresa said that if everybody did this for an hour a week it would end abortion.

yeah but this could be a self selection thing.  i mean lukewarm religious people arent going to go to church at 6 am to kneel and pray silently for an hour when its not even an official mass. i dunno.

now many people say that we should outlaw abortion for whites and keep it legal for blacks and nonwhites.

now in the US getting any kind of anti abortion law  would be YUGE and i dont think you could distinguish on race. in other words, i think a wholesale ban on all abortions for all races would be worth it ultimately just for the cultural anti-feminist change it would produce. that benefit would be worth all the nonwhite babies hahahaha. also i think they would find a way to do black market abortions anyway.

also have a few high profile cases where a woman who gets an abortion is convicted for MURDER.

basically reestablish the ideal that All Life Is Sacred and Worth Defending. this would make casual secs casual no more.  make people treat the secs act much more with the reverence befitting what it is: the process that creates new human life. the end.

or, as Anglin said “abortion is the crown jewel for feminism” or something similar. it basically is. take away abortion and you’ve taken away like 60% of feminism at least. the majority of feminism. jooish feminism. so yeah. i would take that gamble. ban abortion for all races. even though nonwhites proportionally get WAY more abortions. just HAVING it be LEGAL is VERY damaging to the MIND and SOUL of hwytes. knowing that its EVEN LEGAL is too damn much.

april 3

this guy puts it nicely QUOTE: ” It doesn’t matter, but probably. Our women need to be mercilessly shamed for merely being alone with them. Publishing it, broadcasting it, is just the same principle as f00king one, humiliating us. They know we can’t stand it. It’s why they do it. “Look, boys, this guy has a place in my social circle. He’s fly, he cool, he has my acceptance, where are you?” It’s how I look at it, now. ” END

from http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/anti-feminist-conservative-lauren-southern-bangs-based-black-conservative/96264/26

it implicitly says, you’re not cool enough to hang out with me, but this black guy is.

and this is probably a talented tenth, trump hat wearing, maga black guy! you STILL dont want them with qt white wimmin!

there is an argument that lauren southern is part J tho. i would not be shocked hahahaha.

http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/how-can-we-best-keep-our-daughters-and-our-sisters-from-engaging-in-miscegenation/96344

hope this one doesnt get deleted hahaha

i mean you shouldnt have to teach it, but i guess horny young teens. when i was 18 i would have banged an 18 year old nonwhite probably haha. joos and some indians can sometimes be bangable when they are 18 year old gurls hahaha. so if were a Horned Up white gurl wanting to get fooked by secsy BBC tyrone, well i would hope my father would Chain Me Up hahahaha.

i dont fookin know, i havent talked to a woman under 50 in 2 years, hahahahahahahaha. not even joking.

ok i am joking, i think i said good morning to a 35 year old woman recently.

but yeah i barely interact with women under 30, so i forget how easy they are to get all RUSTLED about.

like i say, if That Woman hadnt been YOUNG and GOOD LOOKING, I NEVER would have got feelz for her.

and then if the woman is NICE to you, GAME FOOKING OVER. GUARANTEED that you will fall in hopeless luv with her.

the end. next chapter.

it was INEVITABLE! the only SURPRISING thing is why I didnt happen SOONER. because I RESPECTED the boundaries of her relship with her original whyte boifran. which was right and proper and i don’t regret being whyte like that. her making ANY kind of new male friends WITHOUT breaking up with the boifran showed TERRIBLE JUDGMENT on her part. a good father would have said dont do that shit, thats some n3gr0 bullshit. slippery slope to being a dirty cheater or abortionist or mudshark.

maybe i should THANK the first gurl I knew who mudsharked because her mudsharking was probably a Racial Redpill for me! in other words, i might have not been so vehemently, viscerally against interracial fooking, until i EXPERIENCED the ugly side of it, simply by seeing a slut i sorta fancied, fooking a black guy! and seeing pictures of her smiling face next to him.

and then i was like FOOK THIS. there is NOTHING good about this. inter racial fooking is BAD.

and i CERTAINLY didnt need to go through that TWICE. and boy was the second time a million times worse! cuz i cared for the woman so much more, we were closer, it felt all the more insulting and disgusting to me. shit I already KNEW mudsharking was disgusting, i didnt need to see THIS! good lord I must have been HITLER in a previous life hahahaha.

i’ll bet half of white guys have never experienced a white girl rejecting them and then openly getting with a black guy. because if they HAD, then more guys would be RACIST hahahahaha.

but yeah. THAT WOMAN being a mudshark was just karmically CRUEL to me hahahaha. i already KNEW mudsharking was disgusting, and it didnt take a woman I cared a hella LOT about to teach me that lesson. when That Woman did it, it was just HEARTBREAKING.

http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/why-women-destroy-civilizations/3837/

nice quote from goy on that thread QUOTE ” The above quote from the video is why I stopped trying to understand how White women could be attracted to black men. They aren’t! They’re attracted to the rebellious, alpha male, image of black men that has been manufactured by J00ish media moguls. If White guys were portrayed in the same way, they would be considered just as desirable by these gullible, idiotic women who are glued to TV and Netflix.  ” END

NEVER FORGET. yeah i know this is all old, in response to black pigeons influential video from around that time.  although i guess it doesnt name the J at all. which is a bit naive and stupid. if you forget or dont know the J is behind this, then you just become a mgtow mra phagg0t.

i mean shit. women arent SMART enough to COORDINATE all this shit.

hmm there used to be a pretty good smart reasonable woman on DS. i think she left because the place became too unreasonable woman-hating hahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

yeah yeah so i hate women because I am not a real man. but I am NOT a real, full man. so yes i DO admit that contributes to SOME of my woman-hate. BUT NOT ALL OF IT. another part of it is da J’s, and another part is the women themselves.

oh well almost 8 o clock bedtime hahaha.

april 4

i just dont know. its real easy to get cognitive distortions about women. you hear about one woman and you think ALL WOMEN are that bad. women are bad, dont get me wrong, but they might not be THAT bad.

for example, ask a gurl if she dates outside her race, perfectly valid question, because you shun and shame mudsharks. woman responds: IM NOT RACIST, but I just dont date black guys. Im not racist though.

don’t sperg out over her saying shes “not racist.” thats not important. NO WOMAN IS gonna say she IS racist, no normie PERSON would say this! only the top 10% of red pilled, JQ people would admit to being racist as being a GOOD thing, so dont EXPECT it out of people.

getting a woman to ADMIT that she has a PREFERENCE to NEVER date black guys, that is HUGE. might as well marry that woman.

now Dive Deeper hahaha. ask clarifying quetsions:

  1. have you EVER been with a black guy, and that’s where you’re getting that?
  2. so you’re saying you WOULD date like arabs and mexicans? what about a needle dicked little chinee man hahahalol rorororor!

in other words, most women say theyre not racist, THINK they are not racist, but they still Just Wont Date Black Guys, never have, never will, and this is fookin AWESOME.

just make sure that extends to arab guys too. i would THINK most women who disappear to dubai for a week for 50 grand to get SHIT ON, KINDA LOOK LIKE STRIPPER WHORES and NOT qt gurls next door.

there was that one female poster gafarlichtesmadchen or something like that who was pretty good and not just Good For A Woman, but an actual qualityposter. i think she was disgusted by DS’s anti-woman tone tho hahaha. sad! well i think AA is a lot like me in that he can work himself into a real anti-woman lather. i do the same thing. and then i need to tell myself, women arent really THAT bad, and THEN convince myself im not cucking or “white knighting.”

ok got some Robotussin here, i wanted something without acetominophen. i guess i could drink the whole bottle here and got Robotripping hahahaha. i mean its because i have a cough and kinda sore throat and coughing and congesting and otherwise would be taking 90000000 cough drops.

so thats a great point. you can ask the woman during your first volley of questions, do you date outside your race, and how many guys have you been with, and sometimes they will tell you flat out. im 20 years old and i have been with (fooked) 4 guys. not ideal, but better than expected!

TRIGGER WARNING HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

i also like how the woman is a fat slob with a terrible shape and rolls of fat

who the hell makes something like this.

i would agree something this degenerate takes a ton of communication, but how many of these stupid women really communicate about it properly, oh the surplus of willingly cucked husbands who are like please communicate with me baybee about our cuck threesome and shes like no im just gonna fook this manly man

i wonder if she ever uses her lack of communication as part of the power thing. like fook NO im not gonna communicate with YOU you pathetic CUCK! ill just let chad fook me hard tho!

and the cuck puts up with it because hes that desperate hahahaha.

in a sick way, all of this DOES make SENSE.

but the main thing is that you get PLEASURE out of being HUMILIATED. i mean its basic masochism 101. and i cant think of anything more jooish. well actually masochism is very huhwhyte, to flagellate and sacrifice and hurt and K and self destruct yourself? while being a sadistic monster is pretty jooish. torture porn and all taht.

heh. cucked for a manlier man by a fat potato shaped slob. good job joe hahaha.

heh. if a woman is willing to do all the WORK of accomodating the Laborious Communication needed to “respectfully maintain boundaries and acknowledge humanity” in a Cuck Rel…….she should use that energy into remaining LOYAL to her ONE man.

obviously im misunderstanding something hahahaha.

no i am not at all. its not hard to understand. either you think a cuck fetish is reasonable, or you are like me and you think its

ABSOLUTELY DEGENERATE.

NO i dont think this is MOST women. this is like 5% of women at most. those that are both super degenerate and super edj00cated. readers of everydayfeminism dot com, huffbo, buzzfeed, salon, slate, joo york magazine, vice. chapo trap house hahahahahaha.

terrible leftist shitswine. they already suck a lot of dicks. the least they could do, while they are sucking so many dicks all the time, is to suck ours.

i mean all these young women are constantly FOOKING all the time having SO MUCH SECS, it means NOTHING to them, they might as WELL set aside 5 MINUTES A MONTH to give some up to an omega neet hahahahahahaha

woops im doing it again hahaha

plus im getting downright communistic about it. doling handouts to parasites.

i am wondering if Cottage Cheese might be a bit of a miracle food. of course get the richest kind you can. like 4% or 6%.

full of protein and not a ton of calories. way better tasting than shitty YOGURT. yogurt is gay af. gayer than a feminized western male hahaha.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Father_Brown_(2013_TV_series)

I am watching this TV show currently and I am struggling to find anything disgustingly jooish about it. it is a fun mystery show with a catholic priest as the main detective. based on stories by the famous catholic convert gk chesterton, who was probably a decent moral goy and didnt cuck to the joo too much. that would be disappointing.

there’s probably joos involved in this show and probably the religious aspect is toned down from the books. but the actor and the character are very likeable and the mysteries pretty gripping, decent writing, beautiful location in the english countryside. remove the urbanite hahaha.

i have seen like 14 episodes of this show and cant find anything to not recommend it. watch it to relax with your waifu. good clean fun. i dont think the actor who plays father brown is a joo.

surprisingly non pozzed for something to come out of Current Year BBC TV. damn.

honestly I can’t find anything degenerate about it. this from the guy who stopped watching tv and movies because they were too JOOISH.

i mean its not religious ENOUGH for being about a damn PRIEST but really. it is not bad at all.

sheeeeeeeeeit there is a man dressing in damn drag for like 20 minutes on episode 2 though. wtf. sad! i think there is a story reason for this though, like he is in a play. i havent been paying attention, reading daily stormer and typing about racewar and degeneracy and jooish lies and mudsharks hahahaha while waiting for a degenerate poker table to open up.

honestly ive seen at least 15 episodes and thi s is the most degen thing ive seen so far.

ok i think there is a plot element here. its a fugitive dressing as a woman in order to hide.

 

NEXT TO ME, UNCLE ADI IS MICKEY MOUSE AND AVSCHW1TZ IS DISNEYWORLD

mar 6

when you are in the depths of grief you do go crazy. this is well documented by scientists in SCIENCE! literature. and i dont believe its all a SCIENCE! atheist fedora jooish scam, i believe its real, and you do go crazy. meaning YOU do stupid shit, including possibly self destruct. i am scared that whenever i find myself in the depths of grief, i will do something so self destructive i will ruin my whole damn life. no, i dont mean K’ing myself, but something as “simple” as no call no showing and getting fired from your job. That’s another way of ruining your life besides just K’ing yourself. then you run out of money, lose your home, as you struggle to try to convince other people to hire you, as you are currently mad with grief and also look like a Quitter, Unreliable. or if you are a Recovering Addict, you lose control during the grief and fall off the wagon. leading you to quit your job and K yourself hahahaha. have a heart attack at the wheel and crash into a mcdonalds, like how a guy died around here not too long ago.

and then your wife leaves you for being such a basket case, takes the children, demands money you dont have, and you go to debtors prison because you cant afford to pay for your wife and kids, and even if your wife didnt demand alimony like a bitch, you probably still couldnt pay for your damn kids because you just lost your job because you no call no showed and couldnt think straight enough to do 1 * 1 = 1. let alone explain shit you dont understand and can’t refer your angry customers to someone who does understand. there might not even BE a person who understands.

came across a thing of a person talking about nietzsche and kierkegaard, and kinda broke it down into basics. because i’ve been MEANING to read “thus spoke zarathustra” the past…….13 years and havent made any progress. and i hear “either/or” is pretty good but meh its prob not fun. they explained the basic bitch version: that you face EXISTENTIAL DESPAIR, and go through STAGES: first, a very immature muh dick “aesthete” stage, then a more mature Ethical stage where you are aware of the despair, then Religiousness A where you try to do something about the despair, then finally Religiousness B, where you start to find some peace because you have given the despair over to GOD. I think. anyway I liked all the talk about DESPAIR, obviously hahahaha.

i am SUPER AWARE of despair, so i’ve obviously moved into at LEAST the “ethical” stage, so that’s good. uhhh i am DEF OPEN to the IDEA of a god, i would LIKE to have faith…. i dunno, i’m somewhere between ethical and religiousness A.

anyway these philosophers certainly were concerned with the things that really matter, but i couldnt spend my whole life writing books on these issues like they did. i mean just give me the basic bitch version, and thats good enough for me. then i’ll spend my life furiously mansplaining to women why murdering your baby is wrong, hahahahaha. thats good enough for me. why being a dirty slut is wrong. Why taking 100000000 cox is wrong. why The Jooed Life is wrong.  Why Jooish Perversions are Perverted.

i would be the Street Preacher while those guys were in their Ivory Tower hahahaha. They were still good goys though. GREAT goys. Both of them. i mean i do really need somebody to give me the basic bitch version though. nietzsche AND kierkegaard 4 Stupid Goyim.

but yeah no need for me to get a philosophy phd, even if its concentrating on ETHICS/MORALITY which would totally be my area, when its not complicated folks. you dont need a phd. just don’t murder your baby, dont cheat, dont treat people like garbage, do no harm. the end.

i dont need to spend my life researching that, i would prefer to spend my life mansplaining such retardedly basic bitch concept to BASIC BITCHES!!!!

you dont need a phd to understand these very BASIC BITCH, stage 1 concepts. it is interesting that kierkegard called the most basic bitch, instant gratification stage the “AESTHETE.” heh. does this mean they can at least appreciate aesthetics then? so its not like throwing pearls before swine at least? cuz thats what its like now. tell bitches that murdering their baby is evil and they look at you like youre speaking chinese hahahahaha.

i am magnifying again. i dont actually have proof of evil bitches like this. i dont have a concrete example where i mansplained the ethics of abortion to a woman and she had no idea. i am creating a fiction of the Worst Imaginable Woman here.  that is what i do in my FREE TIME.

i wonder what these TITANS of moral philosophy would say about ABORTION. they would probably faint in horror that such a thing could be conceived. no pun intended hahahahaha. and they would say I WONDER WHO could come up with an idea SO REPUGNANT to basic human morals?

i heard a theory that it was nietzsches sister who was responsible for all his “anti-semitic” writing, that she edited his notes to create “the will to power”, which did not represent FN’s actual ideas. i dont know how true this is. i would ideally like for FN to share some of his sister’s anti-semitism. talk to heidegger hahahahahahahaha.

but yeah basically we had all the same problems we had back then, but also some very new, very important moral problems, and you can probably go ahead and blame them on da joos right now. stuff like pornography, abortion, neetism, alienation.

i think some of the philosophers were starting to get into alienation. then in the 60s and 70s everything became postmodernism and relativism and (((((critical theory))))) and deconstructionism and frankfurt school and foucault and derrida and deleuze and lacan and barthes and baudrillard and adorno and other ways of making jooism excuses for jooish moral perversions and moral inversion.

give me nietzsche, kierkegaard, heidegger, and probably jung too hahahah. give me nonjooed philosophers only.

hey you dont like my antijooism, fook off back into the oven, jooboy. I have been antijoo since 2012 and its only gotten stronger hahahahahaha. I am da jooz worst nightmare. next to me, uncle adolf will seem like MICKEY MOUSE.

it’s not a CONSPIRACY. its right out in the fookin OPEN. its not a CONSPIRACY at all. joos have INTERESTS. all races but hwytes have INTERESTS. hwytes USED to have interests. joos interests have ALWAYS or nearly always been against hwytes, and until they stop that shit, my interests, and the interest of muh volk, will be against their interests.

you dont need to sell me on the JQ. i’m already there man. waaaaayyyyy ahead of you. i just wish i could sell more hwytes on the JQ. that is muh weak point, among others. but the horses that dont want to drink the water I lead them to will say, what, you mean you believe in a jooish global conspiracy that controls the media and the money? what else, you believe only 5 million people were ovened at auschwitz???? WHY WOULD YOU EVEN WANT TO QUESTION MUH 6 GORILLION? WHATS WRONG WITH YOU? WHY WOULD YOU EVEN DOUBT THAT NUMBER?

because I am a RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGING ANTI-S3M1TE. PERIOD.

you dont like it, find some other neet blog that wants to help you get out of neetness. and if you’re a joo, go beg at the JCC for a 28k a year job and some jooish sluts. jooish doctors there can get you an unlimited supply of any drugs you want if you have anxiety and cant talk to gurls or something. who cares. go move to your own country and stop your people from jooing my country.

oh yeah i had a moral dilemma recently. i had this friend who was/is a great guy, one of the greatest goys i will ever meet, just a perfect man. the kicker is that his life was very literally saved by a jooish doctor. WAT DO.

so i say, NAJALT, there are probably lots of jooish doctors that save lots of goy people’s lives. BUT THEIR LIVES WOULD HAVE BEEN SAVED ANYWAY by goy doctors were there no jooish doctors available. if that jooish doctor wasnt there, a goy doctor would have been in his place to save muh old friend’s life. not saying that particular joo isn’t a good person tho. he probably is. not a great race, however.

simple answer amirite? fook yes. i only took ONE philosophy course and I knew the answer to that one right away. meanwhile joos with philosophy phd’s spend their careers brainwashing CHILDREN that MURDER is morally acceptable, that EVERYTHING is morally acceptable because MORALITY does not really exist, its just a system of hwyte oppression and punching down. this is what philosophy has DEGENERATED into.

better to just take Ancient Greek Philosophy with Plato and Aristotle and shit at some shit tier toilet college. or i guess just anything before 1900. everything to around the time of freud and marx, except excluding their jooish bullshit.  maybe studying  how they were the beginning of jooish bullshit. defoo da joo.

hegel? kant? how jooed were they?

wasnt the enlightenment pretty jooed?

these are not questions you can ask your professors. your TEACHERS.

i will probably never be able to be man enough to have children of my own. i just ask for the opportunity to help hwyte children in some way, and to i guess be AROUND them in some capacity, like i am not automatically such a bad influence that I need to be KEPT AWAY from children AT ALL COSTS. that would indeed make me quite a sad panda hahahahahahahaha.

so why not help children who are RELATED to me? like the children of cousins and such, kids who are 10 years old and actively in the process of Child Development.

well they have good successful white parents and I am SURE the children will do well. they dont need my help. in fact, they are surrounded by so much good influence i might actually be a bad influence. also i am not close with these parts of the family, and have never even MET the children, in some cases who are like 12 years old. never met them in 12 years.

also, i would be a better influence to somebody who is surrounded by a lot of bad influences hahahaha. then my paltry contribution might seem more positive in comparison hahahaha.

my friends and old friends who have had children, well lets just say these children are blessed to have good hwyte parents. i am not worried about those kids. i mean yeah i should still be in contact with my old friends but. no excuse. maybe i felt i would be a bad influence on their children! because I was a fookin bum who was not alpha male enough to have children!

so this kind of mindset keeps ME away from GOOD influences and also from spending time with hwyte children, which itself is technically a good influence too, even though the children arent doing any hard work. heavy lifting hahahaha. they dont need to tho. they just need to exist.

i mean a person doesnt have to be PERFECT. i would probably hang out with a loser like me just because i have interesting ideas and are not actively K’ing myself with drugs or alcohol hahahaha. that’s pretty much all you need to do. don’t need to make 28k a year, just need to not be a hopeless drug or alcohol addict. IVE ALREADY ACHIEVED THAT MUCH!!!!!!

i mean i would have a grand old time talking to myself about how sluts are shamefully degenerate, smokin 420000000 tonnes of MMJ, watching triumph of the will, going to the park, talking about the 14 words and the JQ, listen to iron maiden and black metal, hahahahaha.

maybe i want the female version of myself?

heh. in a way i felt That Woman was the closest i had found to a Female Version Of Myself. just cuz i felt we were SIMILAR people, similar values, similar Mindset, similar personalities. we werent the SAME, but we WERE SIMILAR.

not similar enough i guess!!!!!!!!

had decent day at the job, answered phone a little bit, did something i felt just competent enough at so that it felt like a Surmountable Challenge, and not an Insurmountable Confusing Clusterfook. i mean thats a razors edge, when does something tip over from being surmountable to being INsurmountable? i mean i would much rather something be too easy than too hard. because you can ACTUALLY DO the thing that is too easy. the thing that is too hard, you dont have a DAMN CHANCE of even KNOWING if you’re EVEN CLOSE to the right PATH or not.  no thank you.  you could be 99% there, or you could be 180 off the mark, and you have no way of knowing. FOOK THAT SHIT.

mar 7

now i am putting EVERYTHING in a spreadsheet to try to get AVERAGES. not a bad way. average minutes to apply for  job. average calories per day. average time i went to bed. average (estimated) time i actually fell asleep. those last two items are my latest great idea. so i can OPTIMIZE my bedtime. obv the goal is not to get into bed too early, and close the window between bed and sleep to about 30 minutes. and still get 8 hours a night. since i get up at 5 am, the goal fall asleep time is then 9 pm. easier said than done. but maybe the numbers can help me there.

measure the metrics. analyze the analytics hahahahahahaha. get 8 hours of sleep a night, lose 45 pounds, hahahaha.

no i mean i have already lost 45 pounds TOOT TOOT. i dont want to lose any more, just to keep it off, so i dont get too big for muh nice new smaller clothes.

heard a story of a man who took well over 60 college credits in one year because he went to an online college and was charged by the year, not by the credit hour, so he wanted to cram as many credits into the year as possible. also, he was probably required to have bachelors degree to get the job or promotion. so he took WELL over 60 credits at this shitty online university in one year. and im sure worked full time during that time as well. we all wondered, well did he actually learn anything, and agreed, probably not, but this is the shitty situation you have to deal with. he needed the degree and he just wanted to Git R Done, and he did. at the least expense to himself. you cant blame him.

The System shouldnt have REQUIRED him to have a bullshit degree from a bullshit online school, or really ANY skool. CREDENTIALISM at its worst.

so now he makes a good living with a BS degree and prob has several children. hwyte guy hahahaha.

im not saying he’s dumb or jooish. im saying the whole system is a dumb and jooish scam wasting years of his life when he should have been making more money for his hwyte children instead of slaving away for 60 credits in 1 year just to get the piece of paper which would help his children. i dont even know where people get the high energy. maybe the children do it for you hahahaha. maybe i should have children just to try to get more energy hahaha.

cancer is the worst thing ever. you can beat cancer, then 30 years later, you get a tumor, you get a savage round of chemo, which is painful and wrecks you, its ALMOST as bad as the cancer, then it turns out, welp, the chemo didnt work, and now you are gonna DIE in 6 months. 6 months you go from pretty healthy for your age, to DEAD, with the last few weeks being horrible pain. like welp, you’re obviously GOING TO DIE in the next week or two at the longest. god damn. it makes having a heart attack look fast and painless.

alzheimers is also horrifying and prob worse than a heart attack.

there are very few ways to die that are NOT absolutely TERRIFYING. cancer, alzheimers, etc. dying peacefully in your sleep really IS too much to ask for. which is why i am Bitter at The Lord for prohibiting su1c1de. in the face of cancer and alzheimers, su1c1de looks FOOKING AWESOME. but you CANT do it, because then you go to HELL. GOD DAMN.

there’s nothing INHERENTLY wrong with online college. i know for a fact there are strict, good quality standards, for those that choose to apply them. i just dont like shady, scammy jooish online colleges that charge an arm and a leg and are clearly run as low-quality business to Produce Credentials. Expensive Degree Mills. but fookin Wichita State University Online, nothing wrong with that. also the shorter online classes are HARD. you cover a LOT of stuff in 8 work pack weeks. I would much rather see 16 week courses at least. and schools that charge by the credit hour rather than the year. because i would only want to take 1 class at a time, ever, and have it be a 16 week class, and have it meet accepted quality standards, and be a fair price. in this case, online college is no problem mon.  but phoenix and devry can SUCK MUH DICK.

40 years ago your dad could put himself through college bagging groceries at the grocery store. being a damn caddy. mowing lawns during the summer and not needing to win highly competitive internships during the summers.  now you have to take out a huge jooish loan thats worse than a HOME LOAN, for something that has LESS value than it did 40 years ago.

and then youre screwed because you didnt get an internship at microsoft when you were 19.

but im clearly MAGNIFYING. PLENTY of people are hugely successful who did not get internships at microsoft at 19. people have gotten out of PRISON at age 25 and still turned their lives around. (but thats sure not the norm for people who get out of prison at 25. MOST of them just go right back. because they cant get legit work that pays more than n3gro CRIME.)

maybe i should just buy and resell drvgs on black markets hahahahahaha. buy low, sell high hahahahaha. no im not advocating this whatsoever. i condemn all illegal things. OBEY THE LAW.

 

 

YOU WANT TO HELP BUT YOU CAN ONLY HARM

feb 25

this is happening right now. quickly watched the speeches by Muh Woes, RZP, and Fat Forney. Woes was great and looked 600000 times more presentable than at NPI. he lost weight and was wearing a Dress Shirt and had a great speech where he mentioned the 14 words several times. MUH N1GG4.

RZP had a good speech where he showed himself to be very J aware and well read, though still maintaining his sense of humor. I just dont like 4 minute videos that are more jokes than substance. but he seems to be moving away from that. i resubbed to his channel after watching hahahaha.

Forney surprised me and had a great speech, getting passionate at times. he def gets mocked and and bullied by TRS but I thought his speech was really good. he mentioned his progression into becoming more pro-white than he was in the mala fide days (and I enjoyed IMF back in the day.) at this rate he is not far from potentially disavowing the more degenerate of his older books. still needs to lose weight though. maybe then a black suit would look better. but i am damn tempted to reinstate muh patreon dnation to him after this one. good job forney. give him a little credit on this.

oh god bless you george, i think he is making a breakthrough right now, at long last. he is developing a real sense of humor and confidence.

this is the video he’s referring to which he dd just previously.

I was moved to send him what I thought was a friendly and supporting message to encourage him on what seems to be a really positive turn for george. i really want to see him succeed because me and him are very very much alike, have fought with very very similar issues.

i think this is the correct song order.

saturday “morning”, the time is right for this maiden LIVE album. 1984 ish, the height of their game. regretting more and more not seeing them live on book of souls tour. hope there is a next time, maiden is now officially on The Concert Bucket List. Period.

one of my serious worries is that i will hurt people rather than help them, when I am coming at them with 6000000000% Good Faith and Will to help them. I want to help neets and losers and people like me and George. I very rarely reach out and communicate with these people. When I do, it’s only out of the will to support and encourage and help them. I would be absolutely devastated if my efforts had a NEGATIVE effect on them. I HATE being a BAD INFLUENCE on people, in short, because that’s the last thing I want to be. I want to be a GOOD influence on them.

but it’s hard because of my own issues, I CAN potentially be a negative influence on people without even trying, certainly without wanting. It DEVASTATED me to think i was a negative influence on That Woman and made her life worse, when she was a good influence on me and made my life better. I wanted to do the same thing to her.

thank GOD I am over that, but the same sentiment applies to anyone I know in real life. my few friends and acquaintances. i dont want to be a Toxic Person that they are better off cutting me out of their lives. and especially when I make an effort to be a supportive and friendly. I don’t want them to say, welp he means well but he’s just not good enough.

possibly even worse is if they DO take my input seriously, but then misunderstand it, misinterpret it, and do bad things. thankfully i dont really have any examples of that.

something in Woes’s video on milo, he had a tangent that mentioned that some men might want to be mentors and helpers to younger people. help and guide and improve them. But maybe the mentor is in such a shitty state that even though he WANTS to help, it would STILL be a BAD idea for the “mentee” to listen to them. meaning its BEST for you to NOT EVEN TRY TO HELP people, because when you TRY to HELP people, you just end up HURTING them. as someone who WANTS TO HELP people, this worry is very very very troubling indeed. which is prob why i don’t Reach Out to people who need help. and why I consciously distance myself from communicating directly with the intended audience of this blog – hwyte men who NEED HELP.

but also even more of a priority than helping others is helping MYSELF first. doctor cure thyself first hahahaha. but at the same time, i DO totally see myself as POTENTIALLY being helpful to others in similar positions, even though I’m not a full blown winner yet, and probably wont be until I am 50, if ever.

but I don’t want to totally BAN myself from EVEN TRYING TO HELP people. if the opportunity is there, I want to be able to do it, and actually succeed.

again, not a HUGE worry because it actually hasn’t happened. The closest thing i’ve actually experienced is having friends I really liked and respected, and wanting to improve their lives the way that they improved mine……and failing, because ultimately I wasn’t a “good fit” with them. like with That Woman.

or, 10 years ago, I was a total degenerate, drinking and MJ’ing and being a total punk loser, but I STILL had good friends. good, positive people. but I was the bad boy. they might have joked that I was a bad influence on them, corrupting the youth, turning younger kids into MJ heads or cynical nihilists. I knew they were partially joking, but I always worried about the kernel of truth there. I mean they didn’t Reject me and say get away from me you loser, so I realize I was probably more of a good influence than a bad influence. but even just the idea that I could be a bad influence at all. that really sits badly with me and is prob one of the more effective motivators to improve myself. but god damn that has been a long, long, long, slow baby steps struggle lasting well over 10 years and will prob last 20 years at least. bringing me WELL into the second half of my LIFE, which I am close to entering right now. god damn.

like it felt really good to Communicate with George just as he seems to be Turning His Life Around. then I got hit with the doubt that he might not need my help, not WANT my help, and just find me useless at best, and actively harmful at worst.

cuz i could see myself Helping People for a Living, and I would hate to be in that position and FAIL COMPLETELY at it. To want and try to help them, but just end up hurting them.

i know this is a very real thing for social workers and therapists and shrinks and teachers and people whose job it is to help people, who really WANT to help people. they end up taking shit too personally. it boils down to the fact that you can never MAKE someone do ANYTHING. you can lead the horse to water but cant make them drink. period. but you also cant HELP but take it personally when you’ve tried so hard to help them. its a similar situation with muh fam. they’ve tried so hard to help me……but nothing worked. thankfully I have made more of a conscious effort to “pay them back” for their valiant, heroic efforts, to send the message that even if i didn’t turn out too well, I still appreciate their heroic, self-sacrificing efforts. any other kid would have turned out to be a huge success, but i was always a bad seed i guess.

but thats a horrible view of muh self. i really really feel like a bad seed but, just like George, i do have a good side. it can just be REALLY HARD to FIND and to encourage in yourself. to feel the good dog and NOT feed the bad dog, to use that old very very very very TRUE cliche. I’ve fed the bad dog so much, i dont even know what the good dog looks like or where he is. the good dog has become an unknown unknown hahahahahaha. but thats not totally true, i know my good dog involves my desire to help people like i said above. and to be a nice moral person who wants to help people, to help children, to be a good person and not a lazy loser degenerate.

you totally can lose track of your good dog, not have contact with him for months or years. so it really IS an empowering thing to finally stumble upon the good dog again. but you gotta hold on to him, feed him, and not let him go. I am sort of doing this and George seems to finally have found his good dog for the first time in a while. maybe reminds me that I have a good dog in myself too, we ALL do. even fookin nonwhytes. but ESPECIALLY hwytes hahahahaha.

ok i have pre emptively moved this into the topkek posts page because these are very important points. serious shit. but i think i am done being serious today, so back to the SHITPOSTING hahahahaha.

was a pill popping maniac yesterday, which yes, IS degenerate. 3 valiums and 2 benedryls. crashed into bed around 130 am, having got up at 5am the previous day. slept pretty solidly to about 12pm and then have been eckbearding today….well sorta. watched some great yt vids, wrote a very nice thing to george, wrote a qualitypost above, so really the neckbearding starts now. but its already 4pm . feels more like 1 pm hahaha. this is what happens when you stay up late and get up late.

would like to do a powerwalk but it might be too cold out there, coldest its been all week. cold and windy. not a good comvo hahahah.

got a social thing today starting at the late hour of 10 pm. will prob take 1 valium before leaving. ideally would sing a good karaoke song. actually ideally i would find some degenerate at the bar and buy 20 dollars of MJ off him hahaha. its actually not impossible. also contribute 20 dollars of goodwill to the group bar tab as several achievements are being celebrated. and ive been wanting to go to more social events and not look like an aloof antisocial prick. i dont have to stay longer than 2 hours. no one is asking me to close down the bar, although the others prob will hahahaha.

hahaha it looks like well known swedish black metal band marduk is now being PROTESTED by ANTIFA on some 2017 US shows because they think they are NAZIS hahahaha. i have been on the fence about making an effort to see marduk. i mean i really SHOULD, im sure its a GREAT metal show,and ive never seen them, and have sorta wanted to for years. they have a good aesthetic of christraeping black metal and i like their brutal blasting and i like that their Aesthetic has become gradually more “FASCIST” over the years, that is much better than satanic bullshit. naturally the antifa see this and think they are nazis. Which i would be thrilled if they WERE! but now i’m hoping marduk doesnt CUCK and make a statement like “we are a nonpolitical band who is totally anti racist and anti fascist, we welcome fans of all races. we just like ww2 stuff in our Brutal Aesthetic.” i mean the same thing happened to SLAYER. i cant remember if they made any Cucky Walkback statements. Pretty weak to see Toughguy metal bands doing Cucky Tolerance and Diversity stuff. to my knowledge, marduk hasn’t said a damn word and I hope they keep it that way and just continue playing brutal shows and this makes me want to see them more.

my main problem with them is , i want to like them and i’ve TRIED to like them for YEARS, but its SO hard to sit through an entire album without getting bored. the best would be a greatest hits album or a greatest hits concert. i dont doubt the concerts are great. i really should go. but stay away from all the degenerate drug and alcohol nihilist metalheads. shit some TRVE FASCISM would give their lives some direction and make them MUCH better people.

or the antifa complained that morgan from marduk didn’t roundly condemn varg vikernes when varg was arrested about 3 years ago for hate speech or something (later charges were dropped thankfully.) morgan said thats good they were dropped, this is a ridiculous violation of freeze peach. of course antifa hate that. means youre supporting a neo nazi.

they even bring up the fact that supporting band on tour incantation had a Ebil Nazi in their band 15 years ago.  I have seen incantation live more than any other death metal band, they put on a GREAT show every time. most of their albums are boring though. except for the old ones with the nazi singer. he has an EXCELLENT voice. and yes he is pretty much a much biger nazi than marduk ever will be hahahaha. and i love it! I say good for him! i’m surprised he doesnt get more pushback. but his current band disma has been banned from tours recently. they dont even say racist stuff. they just have craig pillard with his best death metal vocals ever. I enjoyed their album. I luv pillard’s voice, one of muh fav DM singers. and i LUV that he LUVS HIS RACE OPENLY. I STAND WITH CRAIG PILLARD hahahahaha. If I ever see you craigy I will buy you lunch and try to have an important conversation about race with you hahahahaha.  but yeah i’m not much into death metal. just iron maiden and black metal hahahaha.  and ALWAYS open to alt right, pro hwyte, racist music. hard to find GOOD ones there tho. greyfield stray is explicity alt right and post on TRS  but they/he are….. alternative prog rock? I should try listening more.

ok go to grocery store at 8pm. checked the google maps for a drop off in busy time. prefer to go to store on fridays not saturdays but working normies HAVE to go on sat or sun. and god have mercy on the poor souls who have to WORK at the grocery store on the weekends!!!!!!

yeah i would luv to sc0re a 20 dolla thing of MJ from some guy at the bar hahahaha. i mean it is a good bar. pretty much explicitly hwyte. always comments about how there’s never any blacks and are blacks even ALLOWED here? so yeah its pretty much the best bar ever, but still all the hwytes get degenerately drunk and bang barsluts.

but it is tech fun to watch karaoke. just too stressful to be put on the spot and have people goading you to do karaoke when you dont have a good song prepared, and youre not raging drunk because you dont drink anymore, in contrast to all the people around you getting raging drunk and partying and having a great time.

oh shit the lyrics of iron maiden’s “run to the hills” are explicitly anti-white, written from the perspective of Natives who were killed by the evil white conquistadores from across the sea.  well that’s what im getting out of the lyrics i can discern.

well i’ll let it slide because i dont think this is indicative of where their beliefs are at, i think they were just kind of doing a fantasy LARP as natives, i don’t know WHY, but they dont seem to do it regularly, and also it’s a pretty overrated song, never one of my favorites, pretty forgettable as far as their hits go hahahaha. just dont do it again guys.

and on a whole, iron maidens lyrics have NEVER been really IDEOLOGICAL or POLITICAL. which I wouldnt have a problem if they were ideological in the right way hahahahaha.

i also have this fantasy, this hope, that maiden was less degenerate than other bands like priest. they didnt do as much coke, they didnt drink themselves stupid as much, they didnt bang as many filthy whores, they actually had enough pride to not perform sloppy concerts while fooked up on drugs and alcohol and half assing it for the working slobs paying to see a good show.

like when i was a young lad going to pantera concerts (wow does that make me feel OLD), they were often shitty drunk. i thought that was awesome, as I glorified the degen behavior they showed in their “watch it go” video, where they made being a drunk degenerate look like the most fun in the world.

to their credit the band still sounded tight as shit and i guess darrell was capable of playing perfectly despite having an 80% BAC hahahaha. but phil was always sloppy and fooking hostile hahahaha. he was not at his finest. of course i thought this made him a huge badass, but now i’m mature enough to realize its disrespectful to himself, his band, and the fans.

but yeah it was ultimately horrible for me to think that pantera was so cool the way they partied like degen animal N3GR0ES. I just didnt view it like that. it was more like, god damn its awesome and fun to be raging drunk as much as possible!!!!!!!!

i dont blame them for my own degeneracy…..but that was not a good example for me to be following. i really wish i knew better.

ok now looking for iron maiden tributes, pref with more “heavy” bands and less gay bands hahahaha. i would even listen to metallica doing tribute as long as they are not being super gay hahaha. the remember tomorrow cover does sound ok. i know opeth did a cover of this song too. never my fav maiden song to begin with hahaha.

there are some good bands in here like evoken and morgion for example. and angel corpse!!!! solitude aeternus is not bad. absu is ok, vital remains is probably listenable haha. i think i saw them live. probably with incantation hahahaha. who is of course the much better DM band and they should do some maiden covers.

morgion was a VERY UNDERRATED band and i would luv to see them come back. I discovered them when I was YOUNG and that was one of the better musical taste decisions I made at that age. the solinari album is a timeless classic.

homeowners insurance. zillow IMPLIES that it adds a pretty big amount to your monthly mortgage payment. do you HAVE to get the insurance? is it a complete jooish scam bullshit with no benefits, like CAR insurance, which i spent a decent amount of money on, but get NO benefit from it, even if, ESPECIALLY if i were to get in a car accident? im only buying the “cheapest”, most useless insurance, because i legally HAVE to, and it is a TERRIBLE deal. its very expensive and get no value out of it. getting SCREWED. this is why literally TONS of people just dont buy car insurance and drive without insurance. because they simply cant AFFORD the legal bare MINIMUM. is home insurance like that?

because i see a house for sale for 6000 dollars and im like hmmmm.

also i dont like the idea of this iron maidens female tribute band. the picture i saw showed an honestly VERY attractive white guitar player with her tits hanging out like a whore. it would be a lot better if they didnt dress all SEXY aka SLUTTY. that is not good for a hwyte woman to do. any woman really but hwyte women are MY women and I want to defend their honor and not have them throw it all away.

also do not trust women who play in bands. i used to think it was cool. like oh thats a Cool Chick. then i realized cool just meant crazy af and would prob have no problem throwing you away like a piece of garbage and being cold and cruel to you with crazy bullshit. but probably being very wild and secsy in the bedroom. dont stick your dick in crazy. ever. unless your heart is cold as ice and you are willing to throw her away before she throws you away. and its never good for people to throw people away. so just dont do it.

 

 

BEING A NEET INCEL LOSER IS DEGENERATE AND THIS IS HOW WE BEAT IT AND BECOME WW’s

jan 7 2017

got to get used to writing 17 hahahahahahahahahaha i think i might have written 2016 at some point yesterday

absolutely ridiculously cold outside, like 10 degrees without wind chill. goal is to do errands today like i am making an effort to not be a lazy neet loser.

sheeeeit. if those people are doxed. its a very serious important issue. on one hand its an ACT OF WAR. it means your enemies want you DEAD. on the other hand, it could provoke The Sleeping Goy to go All In. and an anti-J march in montana could be less of a trolling tactic and more of an actual reality.

but im concerned about these peoples FAMILIES.

very interesting how MW has gone from being a depressed AF neet loser to becoming an Influential Leader. I am very glad for it! also that he is a very moderate, convincing voice…..but he himself is developing and growing and becoming more damn 1433 than people realize! and its awesome to see a smart, careful, very well-spoken, likable, reasonable man go from normie to 1433 in the space of 2 years or so! (i heard you can get banned from facebook for even just saying the number 14…….8………….7 hehehehehe

 

hi sir hello, yes I know YOU arent a 1433 WN, but to me as a SME in the subject area of hwyteness, I fell your emphasis on Scots and Celts speaks to our primordial hwyte soul. and i hate bands and music and shows, but i would make a bigly exception. For You. YOURE WELCOME for me buying a tshirt from you hahahahaha. now find a way to record a full concert with better sound quality. dont they have “soundboards”? how did grateful dead record all those shows with good quality where you could hear each instrument? then you mix it in with a BIT of an audience recording (like this) to get that in the thick of it high energy live sound.

I mean hey your albums sound good in the “studio”, you are more than capable of figuring out how to do a good live recording. I mean I dont think they were TRYING for a good recording here. they just wanted to play a good show, and they very much succeeded there, and some Rando in the Audience had the good idea of hey someone should record this. I just like when the band shares that idea, and makes a little effort. a little goes a long way here guys. make a LITTLE effort. dont lose sleep trying to create The Perfect Live Album at Great Expense.

just set up like microphones in good places and soundboards and mixers and shit. i dont know.  enlist an INTERN from university who is majoring in Music Production and be like, sheeeeit you should really pay ME for the privilege of this EXPERIENCE you can put on your RESUME. do a good job and maybe we’ll let you do this again for free.

he has a a somewhat fashy some richard spencer haircut. not sure if it would be an improvement for him to grow long metal hair. sure why not. if you can, you should.

i guess ghoul got doxed pretty brutally so he’s been cooling off. thankfully counter signal memes for fashy goys is still active and i am not seeing any doxing stuff on google other than rumors he was doxed, and he took down bone zone, where he blatantly showed his very handsome face.  which probably led to the doxing.

i mean its very important to have a 1433 ACADEMIC PHILOSOPHER PHD, so i don’t want him to jeopardize that.  to have him inside the university unsubverting it would be great.

so yeah you can get banned on fbook for typing the number 1400 and eighty eight. i have used the number so much here that i dont know if i could find and replace them all! but going forward i will try to type 1433. and how about VVN instead of double you enn. wait until its a bannable offense just to say the term alt right!

im glad we have 20 year old KIDS now who are into the Cause, the Movement, but i am a bit jealous of them having a head start, of them having their heads on right at a young age. they will actually get their stem degrees, get good careers, make decent money, at a young age, which will make their chances at finding a good woman SO MUCH BETTER. then by the time they are 30, they can be making 50 grand a year, be married for like 10 years, and have 3 children.

rather than be 30, make 13k a year, have no children, have not even casually been with a woman since age 22 hahahahahahahaha.

went to walmart. on a saturday. it was PACKED with all sorts of blacks and browns. arabs the browns we have around here. not so many mexicans at all. some shitty asians like laos and hmong and thai and vietnam and all that. but the arabs are by far the biggest and most numerous. probably doxing myself here. ive been to areas where there are tons of mexicans and thats no fun either. well theyre not even necessarily mexicans. they are the hondurans and salvadoreans even mexico doesnt want.

tons of blacks. i felt uncomfortable that this walmart was less than 4 miles from my home. it was like a damn nonwhite ghetto in there. some real bad people of walmart. it was enough to convince me to go to the other walmart in hopes that it would be whiter. and its true it was a saturday. the worst day to go to walmart or any retail store. worst of the worst.

but yeah they had real nice clothes in there. faded glory and george brand shirts, real nice. bought a george dress shirt and a gift card to give to fam. you need clothes, go to walmart. this is why i dont pull pvssy. because i think walmart is great fashion hahahahahahahaha.

yeah well fook women, they are like jooish n3gr0 infant r3t4rds. they are borderline not human hahahahahahahaha.

if they knew what an asshole i was, then i would probably get more positive attention from women!

but im not an asshole in the right way, i am filled with CREEPY woman hate rather than SEXY woman-disregard!

women dont like woman-haters, they like woman-disregarders and woman-disrespecters! hehehehe.

mint wont let you split transactions that are pending on a credit card. that is stupid!

why havent i commented on the black thugs torturing the white man on video. well im glad it seems to be sparking a race war and waking some whites up and making them say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH, im gonna be a damn racist already, im gonna start using the N Word.

But I wonder. I KNOW there are WHITE shitlibs out there who will say “yeah this is bad, but…………….what do you expect? this is kinda inevitable, given all the injustice whites have done against blacks. whites brought this on themselves. they kinda deserved it. its sad it happened to this disabled guy, but….you reap what you sow. I’m surprised this doesnt happen more often. you dont just oppress a whole group of people for 200 years without a little blowback.  when you spend 250 years punching down, expect them to punch up once in a while. ”

that kind of shit. rather than saying HELL NO. THIS SHIT HAS GONE TOO FAR. THESE FOOKING 1NgR0S. maybe we can’t live together. maybe they CAN be racist against whites. maybe whites should be racist against them.

well honestly. i can only think of one or two, well maybe three hahaha whites who are so shitlibby that they might think something like that. shrug and say yeah its deplorable but what did you expect would happen when you keep oppressing blacks? this is just an unfocused attempt to get justice for the wrongs whites have done against blacks. and dont be so ignorant and racist that you pretend it isnt!!!!!!

i said i felt much more NORMIE when i was friends with that woman, that i could even BE friends with a young woman, but did i really feel that way? i think when i first became friends with her, i was like yeah, she’s ok, we get along pretty well, but she’s not in my inner circle or anything. it took a real long time for that. after 1.5 years she confessed i was in her inner circle. i guess i appreciated that and started to be more willing to let her pass thru muh own walls of isolation, alienation, solitude and loneliness hahaha hahahaha.

now i just feel like a neet weirdo. me and george feels. at least he was working full time and probably making about 28k a year plus benefits! and people are mocking him for going down to 30 hours! and im not even working 30 hours hahahahahahahahahahaha. george right now is a bigger winner than i am right now……..and i just made a HUGE step FORWARD!

oh uncle bern hahahaha still doing mgtow and red pill stuff in 2017. he’s not wrong though! honestly i am so OLD that this stuff speaks to me. i am an old fart like bern. I think the current generation of youngins is better than the old farts like me. we are seeing good ideas and values in the minds of our youth. there are probably even decent 20 year old WOMEN out there now. And unfort I am TOO OLD to be with them. when I was 20 it was such a jood, pozzed, degen, nihilistic, hedonistic, muh dick  time. there were fewer decent young women than there are today HAHAHAHAHAHA like these excuses?

so our young alt right hwytes probably WILL find waifus and have children, unless childless oldass neets like me hahahaha. butthurt about our lost youth and our foreveralone and the women of OUR generation were always garbage hahahaha. the women WAY before us, and the women JUST AFTER us were ok though. we were on the cusp. on the wrong side of it though. JUSSSSST missed the boat. and eternally butthurt about it.

basically us old bachelor mgtows will die childless and the new young alt right kids will have children young. which is great for the race. but i would have liked having a chance at all that too hahaha.

but i DID have a chance! i just BLEW it royally!

yeah i just wonder where the cutoff is. i thing george for example is old enough that he got the shit end of the stick. he’s in my weird in between generation in other words. but a kid who is 25 or especially 20 right now? definitely in the younger, better generation.

excuses excuses hahahaha.

school never prepared me to be a good worker drone because i cant even get a damn proper average job. by average i mean 26k a year. the average per capita income.

really half of the jackasses in georges comments DO have decent advice, and if he did these things, it would help him at least a little bit. stop drinking. start counting calories. start doing MJ. stop telling gurls their boifrans are lucky.  but yeah he reminds me of me because he thinks CODING is his ally hahahaha. coding and programming is bullshit. you basically need a masters in compsci to get an entry level job, the only other jobs are Tech Support, which will destroy you entirely.  now granted the entry level jobs pay at least 30k hahahahahaha but i dont want to get a masters in compsci to get there.

or the equivalent of that in knowledge and skills because you spend all your free time CODING for fun instead of blogging and playing Cards and doing Alt Right stuff hahahaha.

in other words i fully predic george will become disillusioned with CODING the same way I did hahaha.  after i took like 30 credits of compsci courses.

but i dont want to burst georges only bubble!

i bet in states wiht legal MJ, do they have like MJ bars, where you can actually smoke the MJ at the place while hanging out there, the same way you drink in a bar? and then wont cops be waiting outside these places at closing time to make 10 grand a pop off every intoxicated driver.

because you can smoke a couple big puffs and be completely BTFO’d, while you pretty much have to be drinking for HOURS to get completely shitfaced. taking one hit of strong MJ is like having a double shot of 150 proof alcohol.  well its not nearly as bad for your liver and body, but in terms of mental intoxication.

but yeah i am very sympathetic to george. but i can totally see how he is frustrating. shit if i were in HIS shoes I would be all set. have a 28k a year Boring Job. its not liek he doesnt make enough money to move out! live in colorado. work your boring job where you know what youre doing and it doesnt fill you with FEAR, then buy a bag of MJ on your way home, and sm0ke it in the beautiful forest near your home.

i dont think george has much anxiety. but he certainly has a decent amount of depression. i prob envy him for not having anxiety. envy anybody who doesnt have anxiety. but especially him because his severe despair and omega incel puts him closer to my level hahahaha

how many men are unambitious? half? less than half? a half of a half? some men are definitely obviously ambitious. and some are definitely not. i dont need to tell you which one of those i am. hahahaha. i have NEVER been ambitious, ever.

well bitcoin finally “crashed” about 2 days ago and in seems to be on a slight downward trend right now. good. i will need to buy a little more eventually.

http://archive.is/oNXP6

oh god this futrelle guy is still around. he is the worst. now he is, not surpirsingly, bitching about the alt right and andrew anglin. mein n3g3r AA. he is one of the best writers and propagandists out there. i have nothing but respect and admiration for him. i think he should do more podcasts and less writing……but all his writing is so damn good and powerful. i dont like reading…..but when i do, i read andrew anglin hahahahaha.  he will be forever in the top tier of muh alt right d’nations. i will give this man at least 20 dollarydoos a year for hopefully many years to come hahahaha. he is fooking AWESOME and I would LUV to meet him one day. I would totally take a picture with him and use it for muh facebook photo forever. if i ever got back on fb hahahaha. which i feel no desire to do so. have been off facebook for pretty much 1.5 years here. no big loss. so now i cant stalk and spy on women. good, that was stupid and bad and creepy hahahaha. it was not principled hwyte behavior. yeah yeah its not fair to the women but it wasnt fair to me either. no i didnt realy STALK them. but i still looked at womens profiles far more than i should have been. it aids you in building your horrible FANTASY. dont do that. youre just hurting yourself.

when i got feelings for That Woman I would gaze longingly at her pictures on FB and saw ohhh gawd shes so purttty i so want her to be muh gurlfran and waifu, yeah shes a little weird looking but shes so qt and purty tho, im so glad i can see that now, this is the gurl i want to be muh waifu, im all in nao.

stupid. should have deactivated facebook THEN.

HA. I could probably get banned just for saying andrew anglins NAME hahahaha.

heh. im just glad millennial woes is become more like andrew anglin. well, not really, but kind of sort of. he’s becoming more VVN!!! People might not feel so proud to wear their MW tshirts any more! me, i will be even MORE proud to wear it and signal to people, this is what i believe, ask me about VVN hahahaha.

daily stormer started in july 2013. cant believe its that young. well i mean he was doing other stuff before that.

sheeeeeeeeeeit, i started THIS blog in may 2013 hehehehe. this blog is older than the daily stormer. and believe me i have been doing other blogs for YEARS. dont want to say their names but i have had at least three other Big, Multi-Year blogs. books and books  and books and books worth of rambling writing. i am a prolific blogger and have been ever since at LEAST 2005.

my average blog was maybe 2 years long, which is pretty good. and this one is prob the longest. i have honed my craft perfectly hahahaha.

the other blogs i tried harder. i polished the writing. it wasnt all a goddamn sloppy rough draft. also i fought to separate the personal and the political. for a while i was either “apolitical” or basically a damn LEFTIST. i was still a gloomy gus though. and very neurotic. but at least i had a political awakening hahahaha. I am very happy and grateful about that. it wasnt enough to FIX me, but god damn was it a YUGE improvement.

over being a god damn shitlib, feminist, anti-white, antiracist. you can see why these people trigger me so much now! they remind me of the horrible person I used to be! hard to believe i was once much WEAKER hahahaha. but i was!

the previous blog to this, though, started to see my transformation. and i retired that because some real life people knew about it. i guess i wanted to use it to try to raise my real life social capital. get women basically. get women by being a Blogging Badboy. Jeeeeeez theres a great idea hahahaha.

but ultimately i ended up Concerning people with my increasingly racist beliefs. so i shut the blog down. well, i think its still out there. i certainly saved a copy of it hahahaha. there was a lot of good stuff there!

and this one, i have no intention to tell anyone real life. no intention. and also no intention to separate personal and political. just let it ALL hang out. my main concerns here are getting doxed, and also making the movement appear weak.

i mean i dont think i am a total dumpster fire the way sinead or evalion is. i think i have a PRETTY GOOD grip on a lot of the stuff. really i am similar personally to millennial woes. a guy who faced a lot of despair and failure and underachievement and gradually came over to the right, then the alt right. MW clearly has his neet past. So do I. I’m still kind of IN IT, and I have struggled with it MORE than MW.

well….technically he was unemployed for longer than I was hahahahahaha.

also he tries a lot harder with his Content.

Also he talks a lot less about personal stuff. And when he does, he often makes the videos private. but when he does talk about personal stuff, those are some of muh fav videos of his.

also he shows his face. i would never, ever, ever show my face. but i have great respect for people who do.

i have thought about using my voice though. that itself is a HUGE risk. just talking this shit out instead of WRITING it. I current have hours and hours of poorly recorded Voice Recordings I make when driving in the car. and some of those are pretty good. 10% of it hahahaha.

anyway im no newb at this stuff. i am a damn SME hahahaha.

but yeah i do NOT want people to think all alt right, and by that i mean 1433 VVN’s who are JPilled on the JQ, that we are all emotionally unstable omega incel neets. I want you to think we are all fashy handsome winners, making 100k at age 25 with our STEM graduate degrees, in topkek shape physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally. i mean shit. personal improvement is a key part of this whole program. and i have failed miserably at that.

but at the same time, studying this stuff and  accepting this stuff has made me a better person, at least relatively hahahahaha. and i would encourage it to neet incel losers. the white ones at least. and really racial nationalism would probably help neet losers of any race. i dont really care about anyone but hwytes though.

so yeah it helped me a lot, but i’ve still got a long way to go. also i would hate to be shunned by the movement i hold so dear, because i am an incel neet loser and have a blog that is all about being a neet incel loser.  a good 1433 VVN is NOT incel, neet or a loser in other words.

yeah well im not saying neet incle loser is GOOD! I’m saying its FOOKING HORRIBLE AND DEGENERATE AND THIS IS HOW WE BEAT IT AND BECOME STRONG, PROUD HWYTE HWARRIORS WITH NICE HWYTE WHYFUS AND 3 CHILDREN AND 30+k A YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

 

ALT RIGHT VVN 14VV JAYCUE

dec 14

hmmm been more busy with job related stuff that i thought. it is technically easy and almost enjoyable. but also want to impress people and show initiative and show that i am smart and prove myself and KICK ASS.

stayed up too late reading the new BERNARD CHAPIN book MAN GOING HIS OWN WAY

which according to amazon, IS supposed to be 8.5 x 11 inches big.

i mean its not perfect. he’s really not the greatest writer. and i have read BOTH his other books. he always has entertaining stories to tell and strong opinions to share, but i honestly see better WRITING from the posters on TRS or MPC. And Bern is a voracious reader and has a masterz degree, you’d think he’d write a little better. but alot of the stuff reads like a first draft.

NO MATTER. HE IS A GOOD MAN AND DESERVES YOUR SUPPORT.

Like his videos and him talking are a lot better, more engaging, than his writing. So when I read his writing, I always imagine him reading it in his style, which makes it seem better.

tons of juicy stories about his rels with women. and they are not flattering stories. tbh he comes across as an immature dick and thats why these women leave him hahahahahahahah. but they don’t really leave him, he leaves them! or he is such an asshole to them that he intentionally pushes them away! why didnt you just dump the gurl yourself Uncle B? well, he was only 19 or 20 years old so i can forgive him. Also i appreciate the honesty of him admitting to being a jealous monster. I know that feel bro hahahaha. but he was only a jealous monster once in his life, for one woman, for a few months, and then he stopped. never beat anybody up. never abused anybody. in fact he gradually lost interest in HER afterwards and she dumped him and he was HAPPY.

so yeah i cannot identify with ANY of that hahahahaha.

also if i’m reading this correctly, he has banged more women than years he’s been alive. or at least when he was 32, his number was positive. this is his “number” and i thought it was interesting. taken from hockey. forgot what its called. over under, positive negative, plus minus? basically number of gurls you banged minus your age, and hope you get a positive number, but when he was in his 20s, he had a negative number. like i would have over a -30 hahahaha. i thought it was an interesting metric hahahaha. good one bern.

Bern says matt forney was editor/proofreader, actually I think Forney is probably a better WRITER than Chapin, although a lamer GUY hahahaha. Forney is like if Chapin had never banged 30 women hahahaha. No I was reading Forney back when he was IN MALA FIDE. I am OLD FOOKIN SKOOL. I just am concerned that forney and chapin encourage each others worst habits, namely, mgtowism and not wanting a waifu hahaha. chapin has felt the innate spark within to have children so i give him credit for that, that’s what really matters. but he is dead set against a wife, and seems resigned to the fact he prob wont have children. that is too bad. i still want him to impregnate a 20 year old white gurl. MAKE IT HAPPEN.

and forney is a fat sad bastard who drinks too much and bangs nonwhite sluts. i cannot and will not approve.

but i wont crap on forney too much. he makes a living from writing and all that. i would just really like it if he got in shape and committed himself to hardcore, alt right, 1488, WN. submitted to TRS and let them mold him hahahaha.

anyway yeah the book could be better but it could be a lot worse. but i still had tons of questions:

what kind of effort did bernard make in these relships?

why did he just lose interest?

talk more about his relship with his father. his mother. his sister.

talk more about his career, graduate school. for a very very masculine man, he picked a very very feminine field!!! (psychology, school psychology.) but i don’t doubt his masculinity one bit either.

i just think he is honestly a SPERG who has some difficulty socializing. maybe. but yeah i will always feel SOME sort of connection to him because he helped me get where I am now, and I have spent countless hours listening to infernos. i mean he is a really entertaining, fun speaker.

did he ever have EXTREME DOUBTS about himself? bouts of TOTAL DESPAIR? I don’t really think so.

how did he prepare for Grad School? Were his Grad School papers better written than his books?

how is it THAT hard for him to get along with women?

talk more about male friends.

actually i think he DOES talk about SOME of this in “escape from gangsta island” which was a nice long book, I enjoyed that one too. just can’t remember the details.

Bernards a Good Boi Dindu Nuffin, would just like him to come fully over to the 1488 Alt Right and its pretty cringeworthy when he says that NSDAP/AH were total MARXISTS.  hmmmmmm. Marxist Leftists.

He talks about going on JDate in this book and he seems to be aware of J’ish identity. it was a hilarious story. his Alpha Male friend pretty much dared him to go on JDate in return for a cash loan when Bern was broke from going out with 10 women at the same time. Then he was going out with 14 women at the same time. he got so bored, berned out, frustrated, and annoyed, that he said FOOK THIS SHIT and basically RETIRED from women. Modern women are stupid, annoying, intolerable, unlikeable, I’d literally rather be alone. And he has been alone ever since hahahaha. he is definitely a very PRINCIPLED man hahaha. I just wish he had better luck with the women and met some damn DECENT women already. I think it was a mix of his stubbornness and terrible luck that did it. he saw the worst of the worst. really he should have stayed with his first GF, and not dumped her when they were 16 hahahahaha. but he said she was boring, they had nothing to talk about, nothing in common, she was just smokin hot and generally nice to him, so that was good enough for 6 months or so.

i dunno, i never dated a gurl for 6 months with regular banging, so i wouldnt know! maybe you CAN get bored with a person like that!

he is an interesting case. he says he is introverted and awkward, yet he powered through that and did “WORK”, facing his fear and approaching thousands of women, horribly and awkwardly, and was able to bang dozens of apparently awful, immature, horrible, intolerable, childish women who were not relship worthy.

i know a large part of this is him hanging around with yuppies and professionals and SWPLs in chicago.

i dunno. i just feel he was never in the right place at the right time. what if he were young NOW, with a growing alt right. even I am getting too old. thankfully I’m not THAT old. I’m not SO old that I can’t be part of the alt right. i sure wish i were 10 years younger though. better than wishing you were 22 years younger i guess. Bernard was still Slaying Poosay when he was my age hahahaha.  or maybe he had JUST become a proto-MGTOW. remember: he is “SO OLD” that MGTOW was a BRAND NEW thing when he was in his 30’s. sheeeeeit. how can you be 46 and SUPER OLD. it’s NOT super old. but now MGTOW is clearly old, outdated, tried and failed, discarded, moving on to something better. continuous improvement. still guys like me and def bernard have been molded somewhat by mgtow, will always have a mgtow streak in us. i dont think its a BAD thing.

but yeah im not as much like bernard as i thought i guess. i mean i always knew he had a TON of experience with women, but i guess this just proves it. BUT has he ever really been in a SOLID rel for 2 years or longer? I cant say. well i havent gotten to the chapter about his WIFE yet. I guess she was REALLY crazy. he jumps all around. he has barely even MENTIONED his wife yet. knowing his jumpy writing style, he might skip over the wife altogether.

I mean I should really just have a skype meeting or phone call with bernard already, he’d probably be willing.

yeah i cant think of anyone i really want to TALK to tho. I’m perfectly fine reading their books, peoples forum poasts, watching their youtube vidyas, i dont really want to have a CONVERSATION with anyone. except maybe people from TRS, MAYBE. esp local people for real life meetups. there is actually a TRS group in muh city area which I have not contacted them about at all. guess Im not really serious about the 14 words then!

Back a few months ago, i really want to talk to and have a conversation with That Woman. Now I am like meh. its DEFINITELY too late for that. it would no longer be productive. it would just be very frustrating and pointless and stupid and angering for me.

yeah i guess i wouldnt mind talking to varg vikernes. maybe weev. hahahahaha. maybe george foreveralone feels. me and him a really alike, we could have a good talk, we would understand each other. i would tell him the secret to losing weight is simply eating less. you eat 400 calories over the limit and you are still starving hahahaha. hungry all the time for a year. that’s how you lose 20% of your body weight hehehehe.

oooo i was happy about this hand:

2016-12-14-21_23_29-carom-0-01_0-02-no-limit-holdem-replay-13645490

ALWAYS happy to get NUT FLUSH and especially to DOUBLE UP on it. does not happen too often!

but yeah bernard got burned out because he was going on date after date after date with woman after woman after woman and was getting bored with their stories and it sounded like going on damn job interviews. thats no fun. he probably just needed to take a break from Dating, and then he could enjoy women more. but maybe im wrong. i mean he did date women after this!

maybe i just wish bernard would hang out with TRS, WN and alt right 1488 fascists, rather than hanging out with forney, clarey, and aurini. who are not BAD GUYS per se…….. no they are good guys, but i just gotta go with the STRONG HORSE.

not that those guys are “WEAK”….well TRS and the WN alt right are just about as strong as it gets IMHO. If they came over to this side, it would make them stronger too. doors open fellas. well they say clarey is a “technical j00” hahahaha.

AT THE DRIVE IN REUNION? i guess I shouldnt be so surprised. Jeez I should really think about going to this tho. maybe its a total sellout thing without orig members. like the black flag “reunion” hehehehe. jeez i bet it will sell out immediately. if i still knew that woman i would ask her to go and she would reject me and go to the same concert with another guy and then i might go by myself and see her there with him hahahahahaha.

no i dont think she knew of at the drive in. shit i barely know them. i just know they are hugely influential and ahead of their time and broke up too soon and led to the mars volta……but i guess mars volta isnt as huge as they were like 8 years ago eh? they used to be really big with the hip music kids.

heh. i guess this has been going on for a while and they already played in my city in summer 2016 hehehehehehe.

sheeeeit i always end up staying up too late!!!!!!

dec 15

sam hyde speaks frankly about his show being cancelled from adult swim. i have no idea what happened here. was it because sam is an alt right racist hehehehe. i mean i was surprised he even GOT a show on tv to begin with. and i would like sam to speak ideologically, i want to know what he REALLY believes. not that i suspect him, i think he probably is legit 1488 alt right.

hearing stories of successful, motivated, ambitious young students. reading press releases. an 18 year old “bad boy” goes to prison for 3 years for drug deal, gets a job afterwards, returns to skool, eager to complete a degree in engineering. maybe by age 25 he can get a 40k a year stem job and he’s spent 3 years in PRISON hahahaha.

people who switch their major 10 times by age 19 and finally settle on MATH, and are working with math faculty, plan on getting a phd in math. 20 year old girls who like the thrill of explaining advanced math to people and seeing the light bulb. a 20 year old undergrad can teach math better than many instructors with graduate degrees, even phd’s.

ironic that us smart kids used to make fun of the college as where the losers and fookups and lazy kids and trash goes, and i went to a Good University, and now I see that the 20 year old kids at the Fookup College are bigger winners than I am at age 30!

I don’t begrudge them, good for them i say, i am glad to change my Preconceived notions of the college and its students, and now I freely admit they are great people doing amazing things. I wish I had gone there when I was 20 hehehe instead of going to Good Univ.

So yeah, good for these kids. but i ENVY them, being so young and motivated and having their Shit Together. if they lose their way, they are back on their way by 25 at the absolute latest. not still fooking around at 35 hahahaha. so yeah i can only read so many Success Stories before I’m like damn. these young kids are huge winners and I’m an even bigger loser than I thought!

Having to explain to people why you didnt go to graduate skool. because you didnt like skool. because you didnt think it would be a good investment. because you werent willing to kick ass in your program. well then why should we HIRE you? why should I pick YOU as a husband and father of muh children when you arent MOTIVATED to work hard, be successful, and make even slightly above average money? very valid questions.

i mean these people aren’t really SMARTER than me, they just have a much better WORK ETHIC. working on long term goals, being persistent and resilient and never giving up. whereas i give up too easily hehehe.

yeah well but i dont really give up until I am about ready to K myself with panic hahahahaha. also, I ALWAYS try to do a good job and have GREAT attendance at jobs. when I was getting PAID, I ALWAYS tried to do my best.  also i got good grades in school, followed instructions, did the stuff on time, and high quality, did well on tests. just couldnt translate that into a career.

funny to be thinking all this when i am actually more successful than ive been in 17 months hahahahaha. but now I am seeing and hearing about all these successful young people and I am envious of them and disappointed in myself, wish i had the GUTS and the TOUGHNESS that they have.

yeah prob get really tired at the end of tonight like i did last thursday. sleep like the dead. drinking a lot of coffee today.

hmm tom petty summer tour. thats on bucket list way more than at the drive in. FIFTY DOLLARS for lawn tickets. i mean its 35 plus 15 damn dollars for all the goddam jooish fees. COME ON. i would pay 35 dollars. 50 is rougher. i mean maybe i will change my mind. not like lawn is gonna SELL OUT. i mean i should see TOM PETTY. would rather see tom petty than bob dylan. why cant petty play a medium sized theatre. more importantly, why are tickets to a goddam open air megatheatre so goddam expensive???? they should be less than 20 bucks. you can cram 100000 people in here.

varg v made an anti alt right video and i was like hmm i think me and him are thinking of different things hehehe. you need to come hang out with the TRS goys hahaha. then he started talking shit about andrew anglin and i was like ayo hol up. i like both varg and anglin of course. and i accept varg is just not gonna give an inch on his anti christian stuff. thats technically fine. then varg linked to this other guy who did this expose on anglin which is supposed the truth about why AA is an “anti white zionist shill” and sounds like some real sinead tier shit hahahaha. anyway i would like to listen to all of this and hear what he’s actually saying.

http://www.dailystormer.com/andrew-anglin-exposed/

heres anglins reponse i guess, which i already had bookmarked from months ago hehehehe

and now varg is dissing spencer because spencer associates with the joo “gottfried”? i have never heard of gottfried before today. heheheh movement drama.

official (((atlantic))) 11 minute documentary on RS came out today

posting here for posterity

suprsingly good, good stuff in there with millennial woes and william regnery, who i want to know how much money he has given to The Cause, i feel this guy is more important than he seems hahaha.

oh come on this just isnt fair hahahahaha. i am starting to really warm up to spencer finally. turns out they just did a podcast with spencer AND k1ke enoch AND andre anglin. NOICE. DOUBLE BONER hahahahaha.

maybe varg can talk shit about enoch too hahaha. i am disappoint hehehehe.

i mean really anglin should have gone to NPI. i think enoch went. or maybe sven hehehe. some trs higher ups. somebody saw the mysterious enoch in person hahaha. shit. he keeps hanging out with richard spencer and someones gonna get a damn photo of him hehehe.

heh. wonder if the trs convention in early 2017 will get press. probably will. theroretically i could try to beg trs for an invite. ideally i would like to go. that is going to be OFF THE CHAINS. i’m just wondering if media joos and antifa joos will notice and start reporting on it like they did with NPI. its possible TRS might EXPLODE in popularity at that time.

anyway now i feel impostor syndrome, and also lazy, like i’m not willing to do the outside work to learn the shit for my job. yet i read email and job related stuff all the time off the clock. but i’m not doing the MOST effective stuff, studying the HIGHEST PRIORITY stuff. and i am worried about that biting me in the ass.

not used to not being micromanaged. but i am used to receiving unclear directions and then trying to Act On them hahahahaha. not that im even GETTING that here. im still trying to figure out exactly what i’m getting….other than i can immediately tell that the people are very nice, and its going to be a lot different, in a good way, but there still are unknowns like…..i cant even say! theyre unknown unknowns! the sense of being in a new environment! it just takes time! you cant rush it! time to used muh radical acceptance hahaha.

dec 16

6 more inches of snow? will have gotten like 16 inches of snow by xmas. last year had no snow by xmas. none of these below 10 degree days for xmas. already a brutal winter and its not technical winter yet! bad news. dont know HOW i ever survived without winter boots for like 2 years (because there wasnt a lot of snow!) or especially warm winter socks (yeah this was a smart move. cant stop wearing these. try not to wear them in public or when trying to make a good impression, its just at home and errands and that type of stuff, not when i am WORKING or trying to Compete for a Wife.

had weird dream where i was visiting an old college-era friend of mine, one of those guys you will always remember fondly and be thankful for meeting. talked about him before. super cool good decent guy, super smart, great sense of humor, great personality, got phd in disgusting antiwhite cultural marxism unfort, haven’t talked to him in…..6 years. hmmm. but i will always remember him and wish him well! i hope he find a good wife and has some kids. it would be a CRIME AGAINST NATURE for him not to have at least 3 white kids. he would be a great father. Like me, he was a HIGHLY Moral, Principled man…..but he was a lot more cool about it. seemed to have it mastered a lot better, hehehe. didnt STRUGGLE so much. made it look easy. Maybe a part of this is that we both spent our youths in catholic schools, so we are Typical Catholic Assholes hahahaha. but yeah the catholics would be lucky to have this guy representing them, but I don’t think he has Gotten Back To The Church. Shit I haven’t really gotten back to the church. I just go every week and Mull Things Over and think how one can be a Catholic Alt Right White Nationalist hahahaha. Same way you can be a Degenerate Abortionist Catholic I guess hahahahaha.

mornings are for coffee and contemplation as the phaggot cop in the “Stranger things” commercial says. NO phaggot, mornings are for being SLAMMED with Urgent, Complex, Heroic, Exhausting WORK, just like afternoons and evenings hahahaha. Free at last, thank GOD ALMIGHTY hahahaha.

adorable, beautiful, and important pro-family 14 words vidya by varg. his heart is in the right place, we want the same things, he just misunderstands the alt right and anglin and spencer, but i’ll allow it because his heart is in the right place and we want the same things and he is clearly a Trve WN committed to the 14W and the things that MATTER.

to me, MY alt right is synonymous with Alt Right. For Varg it is not. he dislikes the term Alt Right; I have no problem with it. FINE. But I would be SHOCKED if he took issue wth the term WN. How could he have a problem with that term.

I should leave him a comment saying this. he would probably reply. bbbbbut I would really like to have a LIVE VOICE CHAT with him. but he’s never done one of those. no interviews, no conversations. he really SHOULD. even bernard started doing these. good for him. really TALK to people.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC79N-Hh5_Zhs_MPLP3QzAJA

go sub to alt right andy. i don’t THINK this is andrew anglin, maybe it is, but the POINT is, this guy uploads like a best of the alt right all day every day: trs podcasts, non trs podcasts, all solid stuff, recent and older, of huhwhyte-friendly stuff that’s not on youtube, he puts it on youtube. very convenient aggregator hahahaha.

http://www.radixjournal.com/tees/official-radix-t-shirt

heh i should probably give a few bucks to richard spencer. i thought YKW aka the JQ shut down his paypal, but apparently they did NOT. also NPI is a 5013c org, which i did not know. wouldnt be surprised to see that go away.

hehehehe i just pledged 1 fecking dolla a month to both matt foney and emily youcis. i felt bad about joining trs in making fun of tubby sad thirsty forney hahahaha. he’s a good writer and he is SO CLOSE. he goes to NPI and amren. i just want to push him further though. lose weight or especially become a damn WN 1377 man. he’s almost there, he just remains deluded in not wanting to seem like a racist. and is afraid to touch the JQ too much. i mean JQ is pretty much the final red pill. there’s the people who never talk about it, and then the people who talk about it a LOT, like me hahahaha. or varg. or TRS. pretty sure spencer does too.

or its a beautiful thing to WATCH a smart white man take the JQ Redpill. we got to watch this evolution every step of the way with millennial woes. as he says in the atlantic video, 3 years ago he didnt even think about it, or was just starting to think about it. and now he has followed it to its logical conclusion. which is why i give him 50% more than i am pledging forney hahahaha.

anyway the dream i had. i was visiting my old friend for the first time in years, and to my horror, THAT WOMAN was one of like 6 people who lived in his house. I never saw that woman, just her name on a mailbox or something. my friend couldn’t be blamed, he didn’t know of her history with me.

there was i think an implication that he might be dating that woman now! this was very unclear tho. but even if that were the case, i couldn’t be mad at him, because again, he had no idea that that woman ever knew me.

thankfully i never SAW that woman in the dream. just her Spectre, hehehehe.

yeah i would prob date emily youcis even if she had great potential to have a potato body and i really hate potato bodies, or women that have such YUGE Melon Heavy Breasts that they will certainly become horrendously saggy. despite these cons she has a very QT face. and her huge breasts would be neat for the next 5-10 years at least.

i like that she

a. faced consequences for her actions, which never happens to women, ie, she took a stand and lost her friends and lost her job.

b. she repented for her past degeneracy and is moving in the right direction even after being punished for it.

pretty principled and honorable and moral for a WOMAN!!!!!

i mean most women start out good and go bad pretty fast. she started out kinda degen and then GOT BETTER. i tip muh fedora to any mlady who can IMPROVE herself like that. to say no, fook this shit, this shit is WRONG, i want to be a BETTER PERSON. so thats why emily has earned my 1 feckin dolla a month. also pretty sure i would mostly enjoy making out, secs, and cuddling with her hahaha.

if her cartoon gets more degen instead of less then i can always stop my pledge hahahaha. cuz it is a very degen cartoon. but it’s better for a woman to do a solitary, creative pursuit, than to be out there sucking, fooking, cheating, and breaking real people’s hearts. a woman who can spend time alone by herself, rather than out in the world causing damage and Relational Violence and pain and suffering hahahaha.

im aware she probably sm0ked tons of MJ and odds are maybe even banged nonwhites. did that degen thing called “smut cave.” believe me i will stop giving her 12 dollars a year if she goes back to any of that shit! but i believe people can change! i want to change too! but its def not easy!

andy griffith show. this seems pretty wholesome, huhwhyte, and nonjooish. was don knotts a joo? LETS FIND OUT.

https://anon.to/?https://www.stormfront.org/forum/t273603-2/

i support stormfront in theory as large, old community of honest pro-whites, but i dont really trust don black to manage the money. i know i donated like 2 dollars to them at some point but no more hahaha.

also if i link directly to them, they will prob find me. happened with another blog. when i was just starting to get into pro white stuff in 2010-12. i was not as directly “I AM A FULL BLOWN WN” as i am now, more like i was open to the idea. then somebody posted a thread on stormfront pointing out muh blog, linking to it. did not generate any responses thank god.

anyway stormfront says don knotts was NOT jooish, but one guy had to have a post saying andy griffith is not as wholesome as it seems, and is in fact subversive, perverted jooish trash hahahaha.

they say don knotts’ comedy style was jooish, pure catskill borscht belt shit, and the AG show producer was aaron ruben, a yuge J.

i’ll allow these arguments hahahaha. not NOT an argument hehehehe.

born in west virginia to english stock. pretty sure west virginia is the huhwhytest state in the US. I should srsly move there. not even joking.

anyway point is, don knotts seems like a nice honest man to me. maybe he was self deprecating because he was short and petite, not because he was worshipping jooish comedians.

honestly once you take the Joo pill, theres no going back hahahaha. you see EVERYTHING through that lens. and i think thats a GOOD thing.

heh. went to catholic church for standard xmastime confession service. i never ever do the thing where you confess your sins in the confessional, havent done that since i was like 12 hahaha. usually do this thing where you write your sins on a small piece of paper, give it to the priest, they bless you right there without really reading the paper, put the paper in a metal garbage cans, then burn them at the end. symbolic. well that is a bit of a controversial procedure in that some higher ups dont agree that its a proper trve confession. might be heresy hahaha. so this year there was a more proper “group reconciliation” thing where they had 5 priests, and you lined up and actually TALKED TO THE PRIEST for 2 minutes confessing your sins in person. so i was nervous about that. did it anyway. no worse than the phone calls i had to take 20 times a day for muh job hahahaha. just ramble autistically about how i am selfish and judgemental and racist and sexist and lustful and lazy and hateful and a complainer and lukewarm and judge everybody etc etc etc.

http://archive.is/TX6mq

paul gottfried, richard spencers jooish “mentor.” article in the tablet, a ridiculously jooish journal, nov 2016, which charges 180 dollars a YEAR to be able to COMMENT on their WEBSITE. WOW. I CANT EVEN. I AM LITERALLY SHAKING RIGHT NOW.

http://www.frontpagemag.com/fpm/263988/some-observations-man-who-created-alt-right-paul-gottfried

gottfried himself writes an article, not gonna blame him for that stupid title tho. TLDR hahahaha. he admits to at one time being a friend of spencer. well does spencer admit to being a friend of him? i dont even care if he is hahahaha. i mean this gottfried is probably one of the good joos. hes still gotta go back tho. even the good joos must go back. the bad far outweighs the good. kinda like blacks and muslims and browns and mestizos hahahahahaha and nonwhites in general.

uh oh getting prejudiced and judgemental again, better watch out or i will have to go back to confession hahaha.

 

 

WHAT GOOD DOES IT DO ME?

dec 3

https://www.youtube dot com/watch?v=C2hOJR0hIBY

this “woman” looks like a man, and should not be wearing something so unflattering, and looks part nonwhite, BUT she is appearing on redice, who are Legit Vetted Good Goys and worthy of support, talking about the evils and degeneracy of Jooish Pornography, so thats pretty cool. i just saw this, have not listened yet.

but with a great name like “PORNOGRAPHY: WEAPONIZED DEGENERACY” I got a DOUBLE BONER and downloaded it IMMEDIATELY for listening very soon on a powerwalk! they just should not have put “her” wearing that in the thumbnail. jeez she is so ugly in that picture it undermines all of our credibility hahahahaha. still anything about PORNOGRAPHY: WEAPONIZED DEGENERACY HAS to be a good talk, good lesson, good message.

 

really you should listen to the three hour mix three times a day hahahahahahaha

when we were young, once in a great while we would find a song that was so mind blowingly awesome that we made a “mix cd” of that one song on repeat for 74 minutes.  this one would definitely qualify! although I was not aware of it at that time unfort. Oh I knew about the movie but had no interest in it and had no knowledge of the music.

here is one of those songs hehehe. for some reason we gravitated to ridiculous 80s style “cock rock.”

i am shilling for red ice today. now i dont like how this guest woman dresses like a HOOKER with the eye makeup and earrings and showing the tits, but uh i will try to listen to this one as well. but yeah even though henrik and lana are All Right, sometimes they do have weirdass guests who are jooish or antiwhite hahahaha so just because somebody is ON red ice doesnt mean they are automatically good.

but yeah what red ice is doing, creating their own alt right, pro white media platform/network, is exactly what whites need to do. create a white, joo-free media. our own news, our own tv and radio, and of course podcasts are a great part of this, and its already happening, THANK GOD.

yeah i know red ice did weird alex jones conspiracy shit years ago, but i forgive them hahahaha.

henrik and lana just need to have 3+ children and hire some white men to do red ice.

i would become a sustaining member of red ice but their prices are too damn high hahahahaha.

65 euros a YEAR?  that is like 66 dollars a year. i would maybe do 20.

i mean they DESERVE it, i just cant/dont want to dnate that much!

i mean its more for ME than THEM, so i can FEEL GOOD about myself, and really i need all of THAT i can get!

there is this catholic church sorta near me that is geared towards polish people, and i hear that polish catholics are some of the most hardcore Based Catholics hahahaha. they are proud of their polish blood and dont have open arms for a bunch of screaming asians and mestizos and browns and arabs which you see in many cath churches. plus i have some polish blood and love poles. love them. would love a nice polish gurl for a qt 3.1488 waifu. poland is definitely a top tier european country.

problem is this place doesnt just have one polish mass a week, they have nothing BUT polish mass and EVERYTHING is in polish, church website, church bulletin/newsletter.

actually this is not a problem at all, this is a fookin BENEFIT. cuz it means they are traditional and old school as fook.

so i could just go there and be like

¯\_ツ_/¯   ¯\_ツ_/¯     ¯\_ツ_/¯     ¯\_ツ_/¯     ¯\_ツ_/¯       ¯\_ツ_/¯      ¯\_ツ_/¯

and say dzien dobry, jak sie maz (????), sto lat, dzienkuje, boze dobry, boze dobrze rzarzarzarza, ja nie movi polakiu, and then they would say oh look hes trying, how nice, then they could hook me up with their 19 year old virgin daughter who could teach me polakiu hahahaha and i could put babies in her for 14k a year hahahahaha.

sheeeeeeit those women are TOO GOOD for me!

乁(⏓ ͜つ⏓)ㄏ

2016-12-03-20_36_03-cardamom-0-02_0-04-no-limit-holdem-replay-13464295

this fookin guy makes a huge raise when he flops a pair of 8s. glad i agressively went all in instead of thinking he had AA and folding! or 88 or 66 or 22 hehehe.

no thats not 7 dollars and 45 cents, thats .00745 btc, which is…. 5 dollars and 71 cents. YIKES. well the price of BTC has gone up pretty steadily since i started playing this shit like 2 years ago.

so yeah if i had any BALLS like a REAL MAN i would have gone to this polish church 11 fookin years ago!!!!!!!

fooking reddit relships and their different secs BEST FRIENDS. you shouldnt have a BEST FRIEND who is the opposite sex!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and IM the weirdo and sexist and hateful racist violent trump supporter for thinking this!!!!!!!

or IM weird because i think open relationships are shitty and bad. im being too judgmental and intolerant of peoples valid choice.

well to be fair, reddit says that MOST people

dec 4

 

i am gradually warming up to emily youcis. normally i am very very very very suspicious of women in the movement, but she doesnt seem TOO bad. plus i immediately get more sympathy for the women once they LOSE something like their job or their freedumz. and so she was recently fired by k1ke company aramark (i applied for office clerk job there, no response hahaha) after working for 7 years selling pistachios at the baseball stadium. fired for “social media” reasons.

yeah i mean maybe this was part of her plan and she’s prob not gonna go homeless or sucking dick for a place to stay (not that most women dont already do that anyway hahahahahahahahahaha)

anyway. so i am always judging women for being hookers and sluts and wh0res and promiscuous and degenerate, but in the end, do those things really impact me directly? why do i hate sluts so much? that woman wasn’t a slut! she hurt me through ways that did not involve sluttiness AT ALL!

yeah well in the PAST ive def been hurt by women who were into the slutty casual sex mindframe. also i just find it very distasteful and immoral and degen and a sign of the cultural and spiritual degen which we must fix in our people. and yes it represents something i WANT but cant seem to get, which is given away so freely to Everyone Else but I am fundamentally broken and unable to obtain.

and also i am judgmental against the things that that woman DID do, like avoiding shit like a coward, i dont like that either hahaha.

ok well here’s a good point: at least i never really became a beta orbiter friendzone!!! or if i did, it ended pretty damn quickly!

it kind of proves that i basically will not LET MYSELF become a pathetic supplicating beta orbiter. i eventually have to rip the bandaid off and be like, here’s the obvious truth which i can’t believe you’re not seeing. I CANT GO ON THIS WAY hahahaha.

going to church on sunday today instead of saturday. going to church that is probably better than the one i usu go to. less cucky and marxist and antitrvmp and leftwing. less cucking for DIVERSITY and UNITY and VIBRANCY and all that shit. shit no wonder that church is full of weird asians and this other church seems to have more whites. shit why dont i just go to this other church regularly. or go to that damn polish church. IT DOESNT MATTER that i dont speak polish. i could learn and besides them speaking polish is a YUGGGGGGGGGGGE value add!!!!!!! its a GREAT thing!

yep starting new 13k job tomorrow. kind of a big deal. nervous. dont want to screw it up. dont want to look like a WEIRD IDIOT. just want to do a good job. not just a good job, but a GREAT job and really impress everyone.

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit i should have been getting BOOKS related to my NEW FIELD the instant i knew i was hired, and devouring those books to get a good frame of reference, big picture view, maybe some small picture view too, reading the books The Director reads for his PhD, which is of course related to his masters degree and what he does now, The Department, what books are most relevant to this job and this department, thought leaders, bla bla. i quickly bought a book right now so that i could say i at least placed my order for the book before i started the job hahahaha but why i didnt do this 2 weeks ago so i could have had the books and started reading them by now…….hmm maybe i am not serious about making 13k a year with no benefits, maybe WALMART would be a better fit with my career skills.

dumped because he couldnt read the gurls stupid mind. i GUESS shes ENTITLED to dump him for whatever stupid reason she wants, but when the reason is THAT stupid, just candy coat it and dont GIVE an exact reason. i mean thats just a BAD REASON. just say I’m not compatible with you. it’s not you its me. that would be better than saying some stupid ass shit like that.

hehe i made the mistake of initially assuming the “best friend” OP of the gurl was another gurl. hehehe. sounds like he is deeply in luv with her and is in complete denial. but not looking at that, she still should not be Ghosting her friends.

i mean this guy is cringey and beta orbiter AF, and theres a very important lesson to learn there, but she still shouldnt be Ghosting him like a coward, throwing away 3 years of friendship, and getting her new bf to laugh at him and call him pathetic (which he is.)

dont be like this pvssy phaggot. but at least he is getting a CS degree so he might be making 30k a year by age 22. that is a pretty good move.  i mean its still risky because i worked with CS grads doing the exact same phone bullshit as me.

bonus points for OP having mad anxiety and panic attacks that feel like heart attacks and he is so confused hhahaha.

better when you are 21 than 31!

then reddit shreds this kid for being a sexist, creepy niceguy, which he kind of IS, but this ISNT the way to deal with that. you have to show some sympathy for these poor sad bastards. theyre not the bad horrible people you think they are !!!!!!!!

he doesnt need to “RESPECT” her wishes because they’re not respectable. just use the word ACCEPT. ACCEPT her stupid, unrespectable wishes, and let her get fooked by chad. the end.

grieve and have legitimate suffering because your friend of 3 years didnt give a DAMN about you as a human being. i feel your pain man. that sucks. this is the sympathy he’s not getting ANY of and he should.

anyway. i wish you COULD be Just Friends with a woman before Dating and Fooking and Relshiping them, because unless I am Friends with a Woman, i really just dont LIKE them. the way they approach Relships is degenerate and infuriating. I just dont like it. rustles the shit out of me.

I wish you COULD get to know a woman as a friend, be like this is a really good person and i like them, maybe I can try a deeper rel with them, i think they would make a decent GF or wife. i wonder if she will be willing to try that.

NOPE. NEVER WILL. thats what the friendzone is hahahaha. if you dont fook her like a n1993r within 2 days of meeting her, you dont have a chance with making her your GF or wife.

i just hate how the J’s are dumbing us down and jooing us down and morally corrupting us all down into n1993rs.

If you don’t like the word n1993rs, just call em animals. they are turning us all into filthy, dumb, dirty, disgusting ANIMALS.

I AM NOT AN ANIMAL!!!! I AM A HUMAN BEING!!!!!

anyway yeah this reddit niceguy hate is just way out of line. niceguys arent THAT bad. have some damn SYMPATHY for them. save some of that judgment for the women, who in many cases are being huge bitches to the niceguys.

but yeah this guy needs to stay away from this gurl, and there needs to be more blame directed at HER.

when you are begging and bribing somebody to hang out with you. it IS pathetic tho! but its SAD. he doesnt even REALIZE hes in LUV with her. at least I REALIZED that. and i STOPPED contacting her eventually. let her run off and fook animals.

and yeah it would help that guy to go to a shrink, but good lord dont tell him you are SUPER FOOKED UP and must see a shrink NOW if you have any chance of not being a horrible person. they hate these nice guys almost as much as they hate TRVMP or WHITE PEOPLE.

i was thinking in an ideal world, i would just get a dr to prescribe me Medical MJ for Despair and Anxiety, just like getting an RX for Citalopram and Valium. Which I have already gotten RX’s for.

so in an ideal world, despair and anxiety would be legal medical Qualified Conditions for MMJ.  but they arent.

anyway i was thinking, go to semi shady MMJ doctor and be like listen, so i dont have cancer or back pain like most of the people, but i dont want to bullshit you and say i have CARPAL TUNNEL pain when i really dont, but here’s something I REALLY DO HAVE, and have taken RX’s for YEARS to PROVE it, i know they arent TECHNICALLY conditions, but…..hey i’ll buy ya dinner right now, you’re pretty hungry from writing recommendations all day arent ya goy? bubby?

the thing is, i could say that my TREATMENT for OTHER CONDITIONS causes SPASMS, and then i could get MMJ for that. yeah but it doesnt. but i think citalopram causes spasms for some people hahahahaha.

basically the TREATMENT for something Unqualifying, gives me a Backdoor into Qualifying.

but not really, because this treatment doesnt cause spasms or severe pain!

https://www.reddit.com/r/altright/comments/5e7rbu/emily_youcis_animator_of_alfred_alfer_ama/

meh i guess i will approve of emily, she seems to be sincere. hope her animation bcomes less degenerate and she seems to be aware that by joining the alt right and becoming pro white, you kinda HAVE to hold yourself to a higher moral standard and actively purge the degeneracy from your own life.

but she’s only been into this for less than 6 months! i have been into this for like 6 years!!!!!!!

heh i dont really care as long as she is sincere and doesnt stop being pro white. she talks about losing friends and such and purging people. this is good.  purge the dead weight and bad influences from your life. Traditional Morality will alienate you from degenerate animalistic losers. you dont want them to be your friends anyway.

fine i will HUHWHYTE KNIGHT for emily even though shes probably taken MILES AND MILES of dick, prob even nonwhite (no real proof.) but i am willing to forgive, if there is TRUE repentance.

well i dont really like these super big bewbs gurls plus she will probably start to get very potato looking when she gets older. but at age 26 right now she is pretty qt, would hang out with hahahahahahahaha.

i mean better late than never amirite. im no saint myself. you know what they say, all saints have a past and all sinners have a future!

i went to this other church this morning and it was 100000000000000 times better than the one i usually go to. not only was it less boring and faster, there were a lot more whites, some qt young white women as well! i mean i already KNEW this for at LEAST a YEAR!!!!!

like the priest at my regular church, nice guy, good guy, but a pathetic cuck shitlib who is soooo shocked at the hate and racism and intolerance of the whitelash, and desperately wants to overcompensate and Reach Out to Mudslims to show them Not All White Christians are hateful rednecks.

whereas at the other church, no mention of this stuff, just a bunch of happy white people, including many under-40’s.

all the whites at my usual church are well over 40 hehehehe. plenty of nonwhites.

shit. starting NEW JOB tomorrow. have been doing laundry. planning on bringing 1 dozen donuts tom morning. ask people about their families. ask about what are good books for me to read about this field. i am already reading bla bla by bla bla. here’s some donuts. do you guys drink coffee? i can bring in some folgers, i have some extra folgers at home. sorry its not top shelf, but i can bring in a little top shelf closer to xmas. heres some donuts in the meantime. how many kids u got. where are they going to college? tell me about your graduate program. what do you think about the 14 words hahahaha. so how about that election hahahahaha.

can i take a tough phone call right now? what are the toughest problems you get in here from your “customers”? whats the best way to bullshit them and give them the runaround and say it cant be fixed, it is what it is, you dont have to like it hahahahaha jk i know we go above and beyond for our clients wink wink nudge nudge amirite?

besides, everybody knows that when “it is what it is” just wont cut it, you have to bring out it is what it IS what it is what it is. then that fixes everything. that explains everything. that gets angry people to say OH NOW I GET IT, im so sorry for being such a huge bitch. now that i realise that it is what it IS what it is!!!!! see before, i was thinking it IS what it is.

mother fooking phaggot cvntz hahahaha.

i was thinking i dont DESERVE a woman Without A Past, because IIIIII have a past myself!!!!!!!!!!!

ok fine, but i DO insist the woman is TRULY REPENTANT of her degenerate past! says I am ashamed of my past, i never want to have another abortion, or fook another nonwhite, or have any more casual sex!!!!!! its disgusting and here’s why! I REGRET doing all that.

rather than someone that says oh that makes me who i am, i’m not ashamed, i have no regrets.

GOOD PEOPLE HAVE REGRETS.

shit I have tons of regrets, tons of shame, tons of remorse and repentance for all the degenerate animal shit IVE done. so I DO want THAT much from muh formerly degenerate waifu hahahaha.

if you dont have regrets, I DONT WANT TO KNOW YOU hehehehe.

the bad shit youve done SHOULD be regretted.

muh dbt book says to try not to be judgmental. notice all the times you make a judgment throughout the day, bad OR good, and just let them float away like leaves on a stream.  just observe stuff mindfully and without judgment.

this struck me as kinda weird. i can see trying to stop your bad judgments, but the good ones too?

i mean i make 148800000000000000000000000000000000000000000 negative judgments a day. every damn person i see i judge them. i was sitting in church watching the nice white people coming back from communion and i was judging each and every one of them harshy: fatty. f4ggot. dirty dago. ugly. fat slob. pig. dog. disgusting animal. sissy. nice haircut phaggot. nice manbun phaggot. nice potato shaped body. your kids are brats. your wife is a slut. you have dyed hair, you must be a slut. how many cox you take. how many black guys. how many abortions. wow, fat AND a smoker, youre in great health, you no self discipline weakling.

i mean its truly ridiculous how many negative judgments i make about people, many many many times a day. so YEAH i AGREE, trying to be conscious of that and not doing that would be a GREAT step for me.

really i am nowhere NEAR as HATEFUL and judgmental when i am with actual real people. i always think the best of them.

but from a distance, when i am alone just thinking of people in the abstract, or people watching people from a distance, god damn, its a hugeass hatefest!!!!!!

no not violent hate, but still very bitter butthurt negative pessimistic cynical recrimination!

and WHAT DOES IT GET ME?

HOW DO I BENEFIT?

WHAT GOOD DOES IT DO ME?????

NOTHING!

at a more moderate level, it would have been a natural response to people who have hurt me in the past with slutty or immature or fat or ugly or irresponsible behavior.

but the healthy way for me to do that is to say, ok, here are some red flags to watch out for, but im not gonna look for those red flags in EVERYBODY, and im sure not gonna get MAD about it if they havent done anything to ME.

but yeah. its like my automatic reaction to seeing a person, is to have a NEGATIVE JUDGMENT about them. this is not good!

fat, ugly, slut, phaggot, degenerate. usually one of those. douchebag, asshole, bitch, weirdo, autist, spazz, moron.

i cant stop judging people hahahahaha.

STILL, i INSIST that its worse for women to go out there and let themselves be used as pieces of sex meat, that it is for pathetic omega virgins to jerk off to jooish porn. because in one you have essentially two people hurting each other, in the other, you have one loser hurting himself.

but dont get me wrong, porn is horrible and i am ASHAMED and REGRETFUL that i ever looked at it. well, that i looked at it so MUCH.

and tbh, i was only a little above average i think for American Men Of My Generation. Many men are much, much worse. i was nowhere NEAR a Porn Addict.

hmm sorta watching this movie the lost weekend, i mean i had watched this intently a few years ago, and i think after i stopped drinking as well, and had gained some Understanding of the Baffling Cunning “Disease”, and i still found the movie disappointing and corny, and for some reason it seems better now.

i mean ive been on the straight and narrow path here for the last damn 7 years basically. no booze, a little bit of MJ though. not enough imho hahahahahahaha. gradually became more Alt Right, more JQ, less degen, more principled, just a better person hahaha. although unfort more of a virgin neet loser too hahahaha.

well its been up and down tho. ebb and flow.

was driving home and saw this fat guy and his fat wife in my neighborhood who are always sitting in their backyard smoking cigarettes and being fat, and i thought wow, fat and smoking, good choice buddy, and then i thought ok i shouldnt JUDGE him, he very well could be a very very very nice kind man, very courageous, very strong. nobody is perfect, me neither, and so he just happens to be a fat smoker. nobodys perfect and what if he’s very very nice.

how often do i need to bring in donuts? i dont want to more than once every 2 weeks.

you gotta ask the right questions. what if i ask the WRONG questions? what if i ask DUMB questions???!!?!

so show them i am smart by quoting Big Thought Leaders in this Education Related Field. I read some education books right? hehehe yes the only education books i read were “dumbing us down” by gatto and “the unschooling handbook” by some woman.

both very anti establishment sort of stuff. but which may be considered moer establishment in 2016.

i mean i really SHOULD be more interested in the Field of muh job. which all I will say it is SOMEWHAT education related.

so yeah i think education is bullshit ahhahahahahhahahahaha. all education should be handled by parents.

yeah well what about college level stuff. the job im doing COULD ACTUALLY BE LEGIT USEFUL to a HUHWHYTE NATION as regards “homeschooling” college/grad level material to Learners. It’s GOOD because it can put you into direct contact with Experts and Instructors while minimizing the JOOISH DEGEN (((((COLLEGE EXPERIENCE))))), i will just say that.

MINIMIZING IT!

so yeah this is actually a REALLY good position to be in and i shoul dbe  MOAR grateful!

maybe i should bring bagels instead of donuts? i mean i will actually eat bagels later if people dont eat them all. its easier to save and eat bagels later than donuts.

now you could still use this technology to deliver jooish marxist frankfurt skool degeneracy and mindkilling soulkilling poison into the brains of students, but again, its just a TOOL, that can be used for good OR for bad.

if it helps even one white neet get a good paying job one day, then its worth it.

so in a way, i am working in support of my Dream Career by Helping White Neets.  UP FROM NEETNESS.

well, if they are doing education, technically they are not a neet then hahahahahaha. well how about neets who are only involved in education, because its a LOT easier to go to college than to Get A Job. you just pay shitloads of money (take out loans) and go to some shitty school hahahaha.

honestly just go to your local community college. i PROMISE you its not THAT shitty. better than fookin DEVRY. talk about fookin SKYPES.

besides, to get a good job, you cant just have book knowledge and do good in online college courses. you have to be good with PEOPLE. CUSTOMERS. you have to have MAD CHARISMA and not be autistic!

so how do all these autists get jobs?

uhh the ones that dont get stem degrees from good colleges DONT! they become neets!

so would i feel more comfortable lying to the MMJ doctor about Carpal Tunnel or Back Pain, or Lying about getting Spasms from the meds i take for muh Severe Despair?

great now the poor beta orbiter kid who was in love with his female friend was bullycided into removing his post. because hes such a HORRIBLE PERSON. good lord they hate these pathetic niceguys more than they hate Raepists. seriously. right now he is probably blaming the shit out of himself for being such a horrible person. and he wont let himself grieve properly for a relationship that “didnt exist.” yeah well if he knew her for THREE YEARS it DID exist, no matter how close she felt to HIM, no matter what these degenerate bullies on /relships say.

THAT KID IS BACK ON THE ESCALATOR!

there is ANOTHER post about an opposite secs best friend at the top of the relships hotlist!

GUESS WHAT /R/RELSHIPS, WHEN YOUR “BEST FRIEND” IS THE OPPOSITE SECS, RIDICULOUS DRAMA ENSUES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i guess you can be “friends,” but to identify as “best friends”? HELL NO.

sheeeeeeeeeit tuff times buddy. im sure reddit will say he is a horrible person for thinking he is entitled to something.

yep sad shit man. well at least you can do your JOB and shit you got a NEW JOB within 8 months of getting heartbreakingly dumped! so id say youre doing pretty well. just work 80 hours a week at your new job and smoke MJ the rest of the time. use MJ to bribe tinder wh0res into nihilistic secs hahahaha.

did i get jealous because they were leaving me, or did they leave me because i was getting jealous?

i think i kept my jealousy under wraps PRETTY DAMN WELL until it became clear they were pulling away from me, talking to other guys, and then i’d say i had a PRETTY GOOD REASON to get jealous hehehehe.

so yeah i dont eer push women away because i am “THE JEALOUS TYPE.”

heres a good quote from this one:

”   [–]PaHoua 4 points 49 minutes ago
If you’re the one broken up with, it is very likely you’ll take much longer to move on than the dumper. That person has already been “mourning” the loss of the relationship for a long time and when they finally came to terms with it is when they decided to commit to the action of dumping you.
Think of it like the five steps of grief: 1. Denial; 2. Bargaining; 3. Anger; 4. Depression; 5. Acceptance.
When she reached Acceptance, you weren’t even aware of what was to come. Then she dumped you. You moved into Denial.
This happened to me. I moved back and forth between all of the stages until I got into Acceptance. He was dating within weeks and probably earlier, whereas I remained in between stages for a couple of years.
It takes as long as it takes. That’s all anyone can tell you.     ”

wow a woman saying something very reasonable hahahahaha