I DONT WANT A PRESIDENT WHO DOESNT USE VULGAR LANGUAGE TO TALK ABOUT WOMEN

oct 5 2016

sheeeeeeit.

ok. got up and prepared for day like responsible man: shower, shave, breakfast, brush and floss, tied tie, now i am just waiting until i leave in 53 minutes to drive to interview starting at 2pm.

tell them at interview today that if it get the job at the “bank” uhhhh i have to take it. that is the one with int on upcoming tues that i am all excited about hehe. i mean it is a patently better job, better pay, prob better benefits, closer, i’d be an idiot not to. any non-failing business would agree with me hehehe.

leave for interview in 13 minutes. all dressed up atm. ready to go. try not to diaerrhoea.

shirt is def too big. pants are….not too small but they are “slim fit” unfort, so they will ALWAYS feel a little weird. i honestly could not find an ok looking blue suit that was not slim fit. it was the price i had to pay.

yeah just the idea that you need 100% accuracy and no errors, the job is, this NEEDS to be PERFECT, not 99.9%, but 100%, every time, your job is to make sure its PERFECT. ok i get that. but what i dont get is that asking a more experienced person to SIGN OFF on this is considered time wasting and hand holding and youre fired. NO. it should be Best Practices and Standard Operating Procedure to have a “Team Lead” Sign Off on your work.

oh golly gee i dont know what im doing but i hope its right because our paying client needs this airplane door to be 100% or else it will fly off at 140000 feet and 500 passengers will get sucked out the door to their deaths hahahaha.

or this bridge will fall apart and 1000 people will die and its on YOUR hands, lowly level 1 guy, not the Master Engineer who YOU thought “should” “sign off” on such an important project. no hes got better things to do like get drunk at lunch and look at Prep The Bull and Trap Porn on his work computer and make 4 times as much as you.

later

welp did my interview. it was kinda ridiculous but not in a horrible way. mainly the guy double booked his interviews for 2 people at the same time, there was a white man also dressed in a nice suit, but he seemed about 5 years older than me.  but healthy and regenerate looking hahaha. very healthy weight. anyway this other manager decided he would essentially do the interview with me, so i started talking to him, he was an all right guy, but then it was like ok lets see if the original manager is ready to talk to you now. so i ultimately talked to TWO managers one after the other and the whole thing took like 1 hour 40 minutes. thankfully both guys were nice and the company and job actually seemed all right EXCEPT there is a kind of sales/incentive pay structure, but there is a damn 13 week training program and starting at 17 dollars an hour at that time, so…..thats pretty good. the guy said the guys here were very “BLUE COLLAR” and i said thats great, I come from a blue collar family and have a Thick Skin to handle Bantz and F-Bombs hahahahaha.

i said all the right marketing bullshit about the companys culture and values and bla bla bla.

there were some times when i stumbled and sounded like an autist, similarly to how i did yesterday, but just like the person yesterday, they didnt jump on me for it or even seem to care. so i spilled the spaghetti a couple times, NO BIG DEAL. and that is ultimately pretty encouraging.

there was a sales office right there and they are hiring sales people too. i said my background was more geared towards Service Technician than Sales per se, although I DO have very good Communication and People skills and like to Educate people hahhahahahahaha.

but they also emphasized they are an Ethical company and do not try to sell people things they dont need. Which could be BS, but I said, Good, because I’m a very ethical guy and I wouldn’t want to sell people things they really don’t need. which is NOT BS!!!!!!!

well i have been so busy interviewing i missed the deadline for a few jobs to apply hehe. have to keep a PIPELINE going hahahahahahaha.

one thing i did like about the job today was that they had a lot of training. a LOT of training. 13 weeks. they said a lot of guys were confident at 8 weeks and said let me get out there, the the company wanted to err on the side of caution. and make sure people passed tests and got certified for jobs where certification was not Legally Mandatory.

now they could just be bullshitting to sell the job to me…..but its pretty good bullshit! shit yeah tell me more about how you make sure your people are fully trained.

since it does get into incentive based shit after training, i asked if any of the people really struggled with that. the manager said everyone is doing well and reaching goals. and these are salty technicians and not born smooth talking salesmen.

anyway i hate the idea that a woman will dump you as soon as you stop showing strength. that she can need you but GOD FORBID you ever need HER. is this really the way women are and i just have to accept it? I accept that men are stronger emotionally and physically and mentally than women and that men have to do MOST of the work……but I don’t think women cant be capable of doing any work at all. so you have to support her always, and she supports you NEVER? thats fookin gay.

yeah well she never gave up and walked out when her longterm boifran was freezing HER out. but im not sure he was being “WEAK” though. he was being strong but silent hahahaha. well, he might not have been being “STRONG” but he wasnt being WEAK either. he was jsut distant and cold and stubborn. but she made a real effort with him at least.

so yeah she was capable. jsut not with me. because i was weak hahahaha.

i just HATE the idea that you have to be PERFECT or else they LEAVE.

but thats clearly not true! her BF wasnt perfect and she gave him MORE than a fair chance! many women stay with men who are VERY not perfect!

yeah but these men present as strong, and not at all as weak. they dont get nervous or anxious. they might get ANGRY at the women always wanting to TALK and DO STUFF and FIX stuff. but the men are not freaking out like a hysterical WOMAN.

oct 6

 

classic album here, if you dont like this album, gtfo. train your 3dpd fat slob to like this album as you bang her hahahahaha.

as a lifelong fan of srs metal, i have learned the important and mature lesson than women who like metal = crazy = bad (im talking about like serious fans of black or death metal, not they like a few random hit metal songs by metallica or pantera or slayer or motorhead or iron maiden or something, that should be fine).

but yeah a woman that likes the CURE, i would still be pretty impressed by that. even though im old enough to KNOW BETTER about being IMPRESSED by a womans MUSICAL TASTE. its a traaaappp.

i dont even think robert smith is as big a degenerate as most musicians, well, assuming from the fact that he’s been married to the same woman for like 40 years.

never saw the cure live and they are one of the few on muh live concert bucket list. note to self, if i have feelings for a woman, do NOT take that woman to the cure concert, because i wont be able to remember that as a good memory when she dumps me and breaks my heart hahaha. go with a male friend or alone.

yeah hard to go wrong with the cure. it is smooth and chill, and beautiful, and melodic, romantic, catchy, and also sad and emo, and spine chilling, and this album is probably their best moment. the Lush Beauty of “pictures of you” to the super catchy hard rocking of “fascination street” and of course their biggest hit “lovesong” which is a great song. i mean its impossible not to like and RESPECT this album. for any fan of music. if you dislike this album YOUR JUST STUPID.

yeah i guess if youre a total hipster you could say its too mainstream and overplayed. its def mainstream but is it REALLY overplayed? are these REALLY boring songs? these are timeless, classic songs that are played a lot for a REASON.

it IS a little LONG though at 63 minutes, where 40 minutes is the ideal album length.

working class men on Worksites listen to MUSIC all day as they do their hard work. i think this is very significant and worth some thought. if you are listening to music, it is harder to PANIC and be ANXIOUS and NERVOUS, and ALSO it means you are CONSTANTLY TALKING and thinking on your feet to come up with Bullshit Explanations for both your supervisors and your customers. that is EXHAUSTING. its like CAMPAIGNING for president and you have to talk and bullshit all day. i could NEVER do that, i dont know where trump gets his ENERGY, but its safe to say he’s always been that way, and some people just ARE.

heheh i forgot about the 311 cover of lovesong. that is tbh pretty darn good fam hahahaha. pretty secsy for blowing out your bitches asshole hahahahaha. because they LIKE being treated like Jooish Pornographic Filth. Absolutely Disgusting. BELIEVE ME, I would rather treat them as Fragile Flowers, because I HATE Jooish Pornographic Filth. Hate that Disgusting SHit that has RUINED Women And Men. words cannot describe the HATE. i dont hate nonwhites, i might not even hate joos, but by god i HATE the disgusting filth that joos have created! I hate the evil they have done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

funny that the cure has an album called “pornography.” as an old man, this to me is AWESOME because that is an INCREDIBLY dark, despairing, nihilistic album, and I think this terrible feel perfectly captures the actual real essence of pornography. it is not secsy or hot and all. it is empty and despairing and nihilistic and soulless and horrible. i’m not sure if thats what robert (first name basis hahahaha) was getting at, but i like to think he was hahahahaha.

and yeah “pictures of you” is a CLASSIC FOR A REASON!!!!! and perfectly captures Lost Love and Heartbreak and Regret and embodies what i have felt for the past 14 months hahahahahahaha. thankfully i can enjoy the song on its own merits as a way to express a personal emotion that was unshared with her, hahahaha. meaning, im glad i never cuddled or buttfooked her while listening to THE CURE or this album, because then it would actually REMIND me of her, rather than help me Get Over Muh Emotions ABOUT her. in other words, the cure is MY thing and not HER thing, definitely not OUR thing. well she probably likes a few cure songs but we never shared any cure moments, thank god.

NEVER share things with women hahahahaha cuz then you cant enjoy your favorite music and movies when they break your heart and leave you. THEY WILL RUIN YOUR FAVORITE THINGS FOR YOU. i mean thank god i can still listen to neil young, but it took a while! TOO LONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yeah i mean you get over it, but it sucked that i couldnt even listen to one of muh favorite music guys for months!!!!!!!!!!!!

want to get out of house before noon today (oh god that sounds so lazy and negrish!!!!!!) and do some errands

also prep for autist aba job interview tommorow

AND apply for 3 jobs because i think about 3 decent jobs are gonna “expire” by tommorow

AND get good powerwalk

AND get 14 pushups

AND eat less than 1200 calories because i went like EIGHT HUNDRED OVER yesterday, oy vey.

uhhhh 14 pushups is a good baby step, but all together that is a lot of baby steps hahahaha.

ok went to store

ok called the interview place and stalked the woman who will be interviewing me, she was supposed to email me 2 days ago but it never went thru because she typed my hard to spell email wrong.

i called her and aksed for her hard to spell email and successfully sent a message to her hahahaha. thankfully she does not have a masters degree and seems like a nice person from the stalking i did.

ok got the shit printed out, hehhehe if you have to print out 10 pages of shit for every interview, thats 250 pages hahahaha. i have already bought 2 black ink cartridges and am burning thru the 3rd one pretty quickly. so stupid.

not going to get a ton of sleep tonight, might blank out and do a gary johnson aleppo moment tomorrow. that really looks bad. well if he can get to be governor, i can get a 12 dollar an hour autism technician job.

uhhhh applied to 2 jobs today but not 3. prepared my info sheet for tomorrow.

this org clearly has a problem with people not sticking around. prob because they quickly find better paying jobs. and they cant afford to pay them more because they are a nonprofit org. so they are angry about people getting valuable autism training and then leaving before 10 months. but i……

i dunno i just hate being in a job and saying OH GOD HOW AM I GONNA DO THIS I DONT KNOW WHAT IM DOING I CANT HANDLE THIS JOB OH GOD WHAT DO I DO OH GOD THIS IS RIDICULOUS WHY DID THEY GIVE ME THIS JOB OH YEAH BECAUSE THEY CANT FIND PEOPLE WHO WILL PUT UP WITH THIS SHIT FOR MORE THAN A FEW DAYS WITHOUT QUITTING!!!! WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO HERE WHAT SHOULD I SAY TO THESE PEOPLE TELL ME WHAT TO DO PLEEEEASE TELL ME WHAT TO SAY TO THEM I DONT KNOW WHAT IM DOOOOOOOOOOOING HOW CAN YOU PUT ME OUT HERE IN FRONT OF THESE PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i also worry that the “workplace safety” job will do regular drug tests because you drive a company van. oh god i cant drive a large van!!!!!!! what if the van breaks down!!!!!!

i think this autism job would be more fun and i would enjoy it more and also be able to SURVIVE and WITHSTAND it better, because it is part time and because it is sort of in muh wheelhouse. well i am more conflicting about wanting the autism job vs the safety job, however in the autism vs the bank job, i def want the bank job!!!!!

hehehehe this is assuming i get offers from both jobs in these situations. VERY big assumptions!!!!!

does that mean i had a good feeling abotu the saftey job? kind of!

and i have kinda a good feeling about getting the autism job.

REALLY? I have been REJECTED for ELEVEN dollar an hour part time jobs recently, what reason do i have to be optimistic about a TWELVE DAH PT job? hahahahaha. well because my degree actually relates to this job, sort of, where it doesnt relate to “office administrative assistant” job. which is stupid. i mean the better degree for that would be business. even if i have 30 credits of business classes. doesnt matter i guess hahaha.

shit they might reject me because ive never worked with CHILDREN before. let alone autist children haha.

i wish you could negotiate training wages. meaning i would gladly accept minimum wage for the first month or however long it took for me to be rejected from the other 2 jobs i am in contention for. so if i got one of those jobs, the autism place wouldnt lose too much money training me. cuz its a decent org and i might want to reapply with them in a few years. for one of their FT jobs that dont exist, yeah sure hahahaha.

oct 7 firday

752 AM

up real early today, like a real working man, currently dressed up and ready to go to interview, did not prep so well. as predicted, did not sleep well. well i was up thinking until like 130 am. thankfully i did fall asleep and I was in the middle of an interesting dream that i was scheduled to be part of the death panel on the next daily shoah with k1ke enoch and “sven” and i was like iii dunno guys, what the hell am I gonna be able to add to this, im gonna sound like an idiot, but im honored you asked me, i really like TRS hahahahaha. this is probably muh first TRS related DREAM hahahahaha. much better than having dreams about you know WHO hahaha.

ok. like i say, its a tough call between autism job vs safety job. for a normie, no its not, the safety job BTFOs the autism because it pays more, more hours, FT, established company, health care, bennies etc.

12 pm

welp did the interview, sent thank you note, recorded it as 95 minutes. spent an hour in there, but onyl about 30 minutes talking to them, and like 20 minutes filling out a damn application by hand which was basically a copy of all the shit i already gave them. i will never understand these stupid hiring policies. filling out shit by hand. unbelievable. told them about muh desire for FT. they were very understanding. talked to a Masters Level Psychologist who is about 7 years younger than me, oy vey hahahahaha.

there might be young 3 year old children biting and smacking and pooping their pants and i have to put diapers on them. i think i would rather do this than answer phone calls hahahahaha.

i dont fookin know man i just want a job where i can get help if i need it and i am not constantly needing it and not constantly fighting and struggling to survive every day. good god. the type of exhausting, nervous struggle where you feel like you need to chug Whiskey straight from the bottle at the end of every day.

hehehe normal life is at least 2 to 3 times HARDER for me than for normies. not that normies have it easy! but the basics of Holding Down a Job and Banging A Bitch, those are at LEAST 3 times harder for me. lots of fear and failure hehehehe. lots of time wasted. lots of not getting anywhere.

on the degen show “better things” which im not sure why i am watching, well because i want to see a degen single mother raising degen girls, its really all about degen women, and is kinda like “GIRLS” in that regard. no husbands or fathers, mothers a whore, her oldest daughter is 16 and beautiful and is becoming a whore, the middle daughter is an autistic ocd 13 year old lesbian, so i guess all that is enough to sell me.

recent episode focused on the 16 year old daughter worried about her future, going to college and all that, what am i gonna do with my life, her high school guidance counselor says no ivy league for you, you shoulda started prepping for that a few years ago, might not have the grades for a good state shool, have you thought about community college?

now the red pill is that community college is awesome but it DOES have a reputation as for underachieving losers, so when you’re in high school, you shudder at the thought. then when 10 years later youre still a huge loser, you think, welp, i have been humbled, time to go to CC now that real University did not work out.

anyway the girl is very anxious and despairing and I totally related and found this storyline very compelling. i guess she smokes MJ and does not get 4.0 grades. dont know if she is a huge horrible slut. PROBABLY, knowing this degen show.

because they show the girl sitting with her degen mom and the degen moms friends all sitting around drinking and talking about ABORTIONS, like how many abotions you got, tell the story of that abortion, and i was like, they are trying WAY too hard to make this show edgy, and what EXACTLY are they trying to say? they were clearly trying to be provocative by having such a “FRANK” discussion of abortions while CHILDREN were amongst them, as if to say, this is NORMAL, this is not a big deal, we all have abortions, and you’ll get abortions too, its just a fact of life, rite of passage for a woman, dont be ashamed of this, its good to be pro choice, and if you get knocked up when you are having fun with Secsy Boys, you can and should totes get an abortion too.

so i felt sympathy for this poor girl just about to become a Woman, and that she was so FOOKED because her mother is such a damn baby murdering degenerate. so the beautiful 16 year old gurl is gonna become a slut REAL soon if she isnt already, prob lose V to badboi, then quickly start riding C carousel, throwing a bunch of betabois away, probably start cheating, not take secs seriously, not take human life seriously, the way she THROWS LIVES AWAY, develop 10000 C stare, never be able to have a serious rel with a man, just like her crazy whore mother who cant love a man either.  but is this “beautifully flawed” woman trying to raise 3 young daughters as a Single Working Mom who is very open about Secs and Abortions and Being Tuff and You Do You Grrrrrl.

and its NORMAL to be a slut and cheat and break hearts and throw people away and get abortions, sex is FUN FIRST and if you get preggers, no big deal, get an abortion, WEVE ALL DONE IT. and sometimes you just wanna get fooked, and if the guy is a sensitive virgin type an gets feelings, AW, TOO BAD SO SAD, its ok to Dump and Ghost him because you just wanted to Get Off.

and we are beautiful in our flaws and we are gonna be as flawed as possible.

and i like the show for confronting Real Shit, but i hate it for taking the wrong opinion on this shit. while at the same time having some good and sympathetic characters. i mean i dont even really hate the mom. but i should.

to make her daughter feel better, the mother took her to the store and made her dress in a Ladies Business Suit, and said there you are, you look just like those successful peopel who have their shit together, youre no different than them. it was actually sort of touching even though she should not be so worried about career and shit. she should have a good father who helps her find a good husband.

i mean the show could have pushed more Red Pills about You Dont Have To Go To College. Go To Trade School or Community College or Military.

so they talk to a bank teller and mom says do you have any college, teller says no just a GED and i started this job at age 22 and im 25 now.

this could have opened a real good conversation but they just left it there.

so do you portray the bank teller as a failure because they didnt go to college? no not at all, which i liked.

i would have liked more if they had a 30 year old with a masters degree living with his family because he is still trying to pay back 200k in student loans hahahaha and he’s done, he’s finished, given up on life, i’ll never get anyway, i wish i could have a family but i’ll never afford it, and i havent dated a woman in over 5 years hahahahaha. that would have been some great black pill shit.

basically, college educated 30 year olds who cant afford to move out hahahaha because they are only making 12 dollars an hour and are 80k in debt for useless college hahahaha.

tfw when you see a picture of FENRIZ when he was very young, like 20 or 21 or so, and realize he sort of reminds you of THAT WOMAN.

I was completely in luv and wanted to marry and have babies and spend muh life with and was devastated heartbroken for 15 months over a woman who looks like FENRIZ.

fenriz is currently 44 years old as is nocturno culto. culto has 2 children a son and a daughter. i do not think fenriz has any children. not sure how old cultos children are. i hope he is a good father to them.

but yeah there are like 2 pictures of 20 year old fenriz where he kinda looks like That Woman. so weird. i told you she was kidna weird looking hahahahaha. but like fenriz, she had nice long dark hair.

so darkthrone was offered 200k USD to play a festival for one show and they REFUSED. hell yes that shows some serious “INTEGRITY” but at the same time i have to think, you’d have to be stupid to turn that down!

Should a man with CHILDREN turn down 200k for 1 day of work just because of his artistic integrity?

basically I give them a PASS, and I think its kinda STUPID for a man with a FAMILY to turn that money down. even if you dont have a family, you still need money. maybe fenriz has bastard children he needs to pay child support. (speculation). maybe fenriz wants to take care of his aging parents. TAKE THE FOOKIN MONEY GUIZE.

heh. most people just like the music and dont really care about the people behind it.

I dont really care for the music and i am MORE interested in the PEOPLE behind it hahahaha.

i mean the story of these guys lives is WAY more interesting than listening to “plaguewielder” or “the cult is alive” hehehehehehehehe.

i say this because i am sort of excited about darkthrone again due to their brand new album which I am going to listen to today on powerwalk hehehe.

did 3.2 mile, 1 hour powerwalk, my normal walking pace is 3.2 mph and i am happy with that.

listened to new darkthrone album. it has great sound/production and is perfect length and it is not all ridiculous, but uhhh i was hoping it would be a little…..better hehehehe. i mean its no panzerfaust. i mean you can tell they are both enjoying themselves, theyre not just going through the motions, so i think a large part of the prob is me simply not being able to appreciate “new” music.

its hard to get the interest of women when you MAKE LESS THAN THEM. of course im talking about money. basically the only people that I make MORE than are total white trash and negroes hahahahaha. at least when i was making 30k, i was then good enough to pull white trash waitresses and such hahahahaha. and that was the best money i ever made in my life! when i was making like 12k a year, i was staying sane but what the HELL can you do on 12k a year? cant live, cant have a family, cant do anything. cant have a serious rel with a woman. i guess you could bang sluts because you sure arent gonna KEEP any women making only 12k!

wow she dumped him SUPER BAD, super insult to injury there. why do people do this? why do you HAVE to add insult to injury? i mean if i were this guy i would be devastated, my confidence would be CRUSHED for at least 15 months hahahahaha. this type of thing will DESTROY a guys confidence for a LONG time.

also when someone throws you away, people advise you, they dont know what they had, in 2 months they will miss you and be begging for you back. dont take them back. be better than that. they took you for granted the first time. dont give them that second chance.

and that def never happened here. she left me and NEVER looked back. feels bad man! that might even be worse. i wuld def forgive and take her back once. and if she pulled the same shit twice (like they often do) then i would kick her ass out (probably not hahahahaha). but she didnt even come back.

but i am doing my interviews so thats as good as i can ask. i have done about 36 hours of interviews roughly. i guess it would make sense to do 40 hours of interviews. maybe what the lord is teaching me is how to get good at interviews. thats the lesson for this 15 months of pain. how to do interviews. sheeeeeeeeeeeeit.

but if i dont have an interview for a week, then i feel like i lose all those gains. and i need to have at least 2 or 3 interviews a week to get better. kinda like lifting hehehehe.

heh 330 pm and could totes take a nap. cuz i got up at 615am and did not fall asleep till 1 am.

 

super lengthy autistic post but an in depth picture of someone who actually DOES go to a shrink, and both people are willing to go to shrink, and it doesnt really improve things hehehehe. she still blames him.

but yeah he does seem too damn autistic and that is probably a problem.

also yeah she probably IS “depressed” but she should get that diagnosed well before 28. I sure did! because i was trying to improve myself so i could live a normal life with a job and a GF one day.

and good on this guy for improving himself from a fat virgin to an in shape, masters degree, successful, hardworking, guy with a GF. but he is still anal and autistic in a way that will hurt the rel, just as she hurts the rel with her “depression” and lack of interest and effort.

this album is regarded as DT coming back from a perhaps 3-album slump from 1996 to 2003 hahaha. fenriz said he was very derpressed and i guess was feeling better by the time of this album. and he was thankful to culto for essentially keeping the band alive during that time.

anyway i remember i actually bought the “plaguewielder” cd (used) back when cds were still a thing. i was like uhhhh this is not the greatest. and that was pretty much the end of darkthrone for me hahahaha and i never gave “hate them” a chance. i did give “sardonic wrath” a try and actually kinda liked that one. that came out following hate them.

anyway just trying to say i prefer this kind of vocal from culto. the hateful trve black metal vocal rather than the more i guess celtic frost vocal he’s doing now. which is not bad mind you, but the older vocal is better.

i mean there is no competition hehehe. however “boring” darkthrone may be, culto gives a Master Class in how to do good vocals.

62.9% labor force participation rate? that cant be good, unless labor force counts super old and super young people….which it probably shouldnt! and honestly i dont think it does. labor force is work age people. like 18 to 65 or whatever.

oh you know what i am not even gonna shit on plaguewielder anymore. it has shitty artwork but it sounds pretty similar to hate them with the riffage and sick vocals. also culto thanks tom waits on his short list of inspirations and shoutouts. in 2001 before i even knew who tom waits was unfortuantely. did not discover waits until 2003 or 4 at the latest.

also there are “blast beats” on these albums where i haven’t heard them on the newer albums. come on. you gotta have that.

trump scandal of him using “vulgar language about women.”

I DONT WANT A PRESIDENT WHO DOESNT USE VULGAR LANGUAGE TO TALK ABOUT WOMEN!!!!

crude comments in 2005 interview about tits and pussy and whatever. who cares.

well, i kinda care if he is cheating on his wife, but not sure if he was married to her by then.

cuz its not cool to cheat on your wife but he has dealt with his fair share of gold diggers so.

i mean this is fooking stupid and i hope it doesnt COST HIM the election just because WOMEN will be so butthurt. and women shouldnt even be able to vote hehehehehe. but people have short memories too.

even the circle wagons album does not sound BAD. it is quite rocking as a matter of fact.

lesson: even the “worst” darkthrone albums are pretty good.

i would have preffered that he make super racist comments about mudslims or blacks or especially joos. that would be SWEET. BUT, that definitely would have killed his chances 100%, and that would NOT be good.

i like that he didnt apologize THAT much. hes not begging for forgiveness, and kinda saying this is not a big deal. cuz its really not. but i really dont know how real women will take it. i know that msnbc is up in arms hahahaha.

why not criticize the hollywood host billy bush for being an enthusiastic participant in the conversation.

QUOTE

It’s foolish to take the Blackpill with regards to women. It makes you settle for low quality sluts and degenerates. Do you want them to be the mother of your children?

I was in a bad place in 2011. I was dating a used-up slut whom I had nothing in common with. I was struggling to finish school and leave the comfy world of NEETdom. I had gotten into reading ‘The Red Pill’ and that middle eastern rapist Roosh, and my opinion of women was extremely low. Thus, my expectations from women were low.

This girl was a degenerate waste. She was pretty enough, but was a complete slob, and nearing the end of her 20s. I knew she had dated around, but the extent of the rot was what really got to me. The day I left her was when I attended a ‘party’ with some of her friends, only to discover she had f00cked literally 8 of the men at the party. Her total number was somewhere around 35ish men. One of which included a ni99er. Disgusting. I drove off, deleted her from Facebook and Skype, and washed my hands of her.

I was lucky to get out of that mess with no STIs. I pulled myself out of this depression and blackpill by lifting and travelling, and completely tossed out the ReturnOfKangz/rOOSH shit. Some of the techniques are useful, and yes, 90% of women are somewhere on the whore spectrum, but 10% of girls is still a HUGE amount of people.

On one of my trips, after a year of lifting and healthy eating, I met a complete QT3.14, 10/10. She was introverted, shy, but extremely moral. She was 6 years younger than me, intelligent, had a similar genetic background, and was a fucking virgin.

Married her 2 years into the relationship and it has only gotten better.

Lift, have confidence in your self, resist the blackpill, and you will find extremely high quality women waiting for you to wife them. Let the f4ggot numales clean up the algae of used up whores. WILL TO POWER BRAH

END

i am risking getting banned for posting private forum material here, but uhhhh i wont say what forum i got it from, nor who said it, but i am trying to share an awesome WHITE PILL here: a neetish man was dating a dirty slut, then he turned his life around and married a nice virgin waifu. GOOD FOR HIM. this is EXACTLY the stuff I need to read a LOT more of…..but i’m not finding a lot of it. not enough.

nyquil and coffee combination hehehe. again went way over calorie limit. soooooo easy to eat over 1200 cals.

yeah why shouldnt i link this already.

this and TH are muh fav DT albums. and this one is more “fun.” not sure why the vocals are considered controversial. i think they are great although perhaps mixed a little loudly. the riffs, songwriting, and production are all top of the line, and there is a ton of nostalgia with this album, as it was a big part of muh adolescence at age 18 or so. this is a pretty kewl album to have as your theme music at age 18 hahahahahahahaha.

“quintessence”, come on. probably the darkthrone stairway to heaven right there.

but yeah. a lot of people are interested in things they dont really participate in. politics, professional sports, tv shows, religion. but no one is interested in “relationships” as like a main interest they way I am, apart from WOMEN who are always GOSSIPING. I truly do like to gossip, but I like even more to study and understand the relationships.

its like watching from the sidelines and commenting but never participating. but thats the thing: is that normies DO participate, quite regularly, and dont really comment on it at the same level as I do, just gossip, say whos fooking who, whos dumping who.

and even people who are obsessed with sportsball and watch pro sportsball but are too fat and soft to actually play pro sportsball still often play amateur sportsball or fantasy sportsball.

i dont play Fantasy Relships, although maybe in a way I do: by having these one sided things where I have the relship all in my mind and it does not reflect reality at all.

nyquil makes me unable to think clearly and articulate and be persuasive. still i wish i just had some MJ, i would LUV to smoke a bunch of MJ on a friday night like this and listen to DARKTHRONE.

“the hordes of nebulah”. i used to think this song wasnt as good as the 2 before it, now i see i was wrong hahahahaha. truly a MAGIC album and i wouldnt EXPECT darkthrone to ever capture this kind of lightning in a bottle quite the same way ever again. you cant. again a large part of this was my own age at the time. but this is gonna be one of those albums that i enjoy thru my entire life hahaha. share with muh waifu and children and they will say damn what a badass!

anyway it is just “funny” and mostly sad that i spend all this time and energy and interest thinking about and analyzing Relationships, general and particular, myself and my fantasy rels, others and my perceptions of their real rels, and i think i have the tools and skills and knowledge to be real mature and good in a rel…..but my weakness is the BEGINNING. I cant get it STARTED for various reasons. cant spark the kindling and get the fire going ever.

large part of that is because i am scared to “apply”. at least with jobs i am putting out 450 applications, doing 23 interviews. if i were doing that with WOMEN, i WOULD have been in a real rel by now, or at least had a near normie level of secsual satisfaction. or, hopefully, i would say THIS IS DEGENERATE, I’m not gonna do this unless its in a real rel with a decent woman, fook this banging sluts shit, leave it to the degenerate hedonist nihilist abortionists.

fenriz did recycle the classic “quintessence” riff on his storm “nordavind” album which was recorded in late 1994 while panzerfaust was recorded in early 1994 hehehe.

they got the qt gurl kari rueslatten to sing on the album (from 3rd and the mortal, really need to dig into them more) and supposedly she was very upset and felt betrayed by fenriz because he changed a lyric at the last minute to say something like “death to every man who does not hail the fatherland!” which she felt was ebil racist. and i bet fenriz is not a racist. shit i wish he WAS. he SHOULD be. and poor kari felt horrible guilt after that and betrayed by ebil fenriz. hahahahaha i wonder if he fooked her. the dirty slut hahaha. see this ALL comes from the root cause of my degen pornographic view of women as sluts to be fooked. this is from watching way too much pron, so shame on me. but also shame on women for willingly BEING like that. they dont have to BE sluts, even if the girls in porno are.

and because kari was a beautiful young norwegian gurl with beautiful long hair, i dont WANT her to be a slut.

i want to read more stories of women who are DIVORCING or DUMPING their men because oh god hes a TRUMP SUPPORTER. but r/relships does not allow overtly political topics.

i would think being married and especially with children makes women less leftist catladylike. so they will say oh yeah trump is crude but oh well hes still better than hillary so im still voting for him.

whereas its the C carousel sluts and catladies who will be most offended, and they werent voting for trump ANYWAY.

in other words, its not gonna lose him any votes. its not gonna make anyone who has already chosen trump, say, oh NOW he’s gone too far, and i am changing my vote to HILLARY? i cant imagine him honestly doing any of that. even if he said GTKRWN 1488, which i would luv, people would still say, yeah im still not voting for hillary.

however it will make the hillary people all the more SHRILL and ANNOYING and that might push undecideds towards trump.

undecideds tho? and couldnt this push undecideds to hillary? sure.

BUT HOW MANY UNDECIDEDS ARE THERE REALLY?????

not very many imho. i play it down because i hang out with people who would be MORTIFIED that they have even ONE trump supporter in their friend circle. so i say stuff, ah well, its a classic lesser of two evils thing, i dont really like either of them, but im really dont like hillary, yes i agree with you trump is not super presidential but im a moderate centrist and hillary is just too left for me, so, i have to vote for trump. that kind of waffling shit. actually i wouldnt even confirm i was voting for trump unless i was with some trump voters. thankfully i know a few.

7000 words? damn.

but yeah its funny. i analyze and think about rels like An Interest Or Hobby but never actually participate, when most NORMIES DO participate and dont analyze them to the same level, its just a normal part of normal life, dont overthink it, its not something interesting like football or tv hahahaha.

well to me it is!!!!!!!!

and women arent much better than men. they gossip a lot more about rels but are even WORSE at analysing, understanding, and workign with them. men could at least have a good chance at reasoning their way through them if they tried.

but you cant REASON with women. its like REASONING with a drunk 50 foot baby with a flamethrower. REASONING with a damn tasmanian devil. you cant reason somebody out of something that they didnt reason themselves into, hahahahaha.

THE LORD WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS

setp 17 2016

reddit. i mean sometimes its ok but there are degenerates who think noods are fine, and being a slut is fine, and abortions are fine, very nihilistic and muh dick.

some of the advice is common sense and good, namely the stuff given by well adjusted, moral men, but like i say, theres this current of degeneracy that is just terrible. that says the being a promiscuous slut having casual secs is ok. that its ok to look at porn. that jealousy is always bad. that nobody has any responsibilities to anyone else. that kind of shitty consent morality type stuff. secular humanist garbage that really isnt that humanist at all!

or not judging someone who starts dating/fooking someone new 2 weeks after a breakup and just say “everybodys different.”

i mean they have no problem judging guys who are creepy or rapey or weird or controlling or abusive or manipulative or immature or whatever hahaha

 

oh deargod. white guy is thinking about leaving his white friends because they dont believe in institutional racism, and are narrow minded racists who think blacks have the same opportunities whites do. they dont believe in white privilege. therefore they are disgusting savages who must be dumped. this isnt even them going 1488 gtkrwn, moonman lynchin ingras, its “sorry, i just dont believe in white privilege bro.”

well no redpilled 1488ers here, but at least they said give these people a chance, dont dump them right away.

but yeah. so sad. white people dumping their white friends because the white friends do not kiss nonwhite ass and hate whites enough.

this all because much clearer to me once i understood the JQ. these powerful white men on top? theyre not white man. hahahaha. see the israel lobby and cultural marxism hehehehehe.

and also realize that many whites are simply pawns of the joos, like these whites spouting antiwhite antiracist crap. hand rubbing intensifies!!!!!!!! yes good goy hate your white privilege! give reparations to all those whites have disadvantaged!

ok. when i fell in luv with her, i wasnt really LOOKING. i wasnt really seriously thinking about going on okcupid and looking for damn sluts. i wasnt really thinking about meeting new women. and then one day i woke up and realize i had feelings for a woman i already knew.

well…not quite. it was a transition that took about a month. i forced myself to meditate and think about it. not avoid it. at first it felt wrong and weird. then day by day it felt less wrong and weird and day by day it felt more natural and right and good.

and now over the long term, the final analysis is that it was NOT wrong and weird, and it TOTALLY makes sense.

anyway. what else. i determined each job interview was like making a big 26000 dollar SALE. that is a pretty big deal eh? yes it damn well is. and not all of us are cut out to make big 26k sales. but we HAVE To be. because thats what getting a job is. youre selling yourself and the company is investing at least 26k in YOU.

yeah i just dont like when people think i had ulterior motives, when i didnt, but they wont let me defend myself. if youre gonna accuse me, at least let me defend myself. i expected the chance to defend myself from her.

yeah i am starting to get over it hahahah but i also dont want to really go on okcupid BUT i really SHOULD meet new women BUT i almost dont want to meet any women BUT dirty sluts because i am in a woman hating phase so i couldnt POSSIBLY appreciate even a GOOD woman!

yeah i made some mistakes but i think they were medium mistakes as opposed to huge mistakes. i guess the main thing to remember, if i ever make another female friend:

  1. tell her right away if i find her attractive or not, even if i am not super duper attracted to her, be like, yeah, TECHNICALLY, OBJECTIVELY, you are a 7/10, but i’m so fooked up i’m not attracted to anyone right now
  2.  but i could VERY POSSIBLY become attracted to you and fall in luv with you after TWO YEARS of solid friendship.
  3.  therefore, we need to revisit this topic every few months. feel free to ask me about it whenever, and i will make a point to check in every 2 or 3 months just to let you know.
  4.  also, here sign this jooish contract stating you will not get mad if i get feelings for you, and you will dump me Softly.

so yeah, i was a….coward bitchboi, but i still didnt deserve this. but also shes not an evil person and i can understand why she responded this way. the end. it just hurt me a LOT. and my feelings are valid hahahahahaha.

yeah it makes a lot more sense now. at least now if i ever become friends with a woman again, i can tell her,

“LISTEN. LOOK. HERES THE THING. I dont have any feelings for you RIGHT NOW, but that could DEFINITELY CHANGE. Because you are not a fat ugly old hambeast but a solid 7/10 hahahaha. just realize that if i start acting like i like you,a nd amd askig your to hang out with me all the time but you think im being weird and you blow me off, then yeah that’s your sign that I have started getting feelings for you.”

“I dont have any feelings for you right now, but you are young and not ugly, so, its not out of the question that I might be attracted to you if you were not in an LTR. If you break up with your Boifran then I have a 50% chance of trying to Date you. but im not gonna push you one way or the other because i dont encourage people to CHEAT, and if you wanted to Cheat with him on me, I would hatefook you and spit in your face and abandon you like the filthy cheater you are!”

hahahaha.

well….what i would do is call their cuck BF, tell them the GF was a cheating bitch and you should dump this bitch right now, and THEN I would fook her, get vidya of it, and use the woman as a hatefook dumpster for about 10 fooks until i started feeling too degenerate about it.

no ideally i would say god damn you to hell you traitorous evil bitch and spit on her and walk away and NOT fook her.

guy is stonewalling a gurl. reddit says stonewalling is bad

so sad, he is 30 and has never kissed a gurl yet, so of course women get weirded out when he hasnt fooked them within a month and he is making a big deal out of this whole first kiss thing….

WELL NO FOOKING SHIT ITS A BIG DEAL TO HIM BITCH, HE’S 30 AND NEVER KISSED A GURL!!!!!!!

SO IT IS A BIG DEAL TO HIM!!!! RESPECT THAT!!!!!!!!

yeah its weird but he seems to be doing allright. no major issues, stable adult, not a ton of despair or shit.

sept 19

found this guy on linkedin i used to work with at the horrible job. he was a “newer” guy but he was really sharp and smart and picked it up really fast. charming, smart white man. he did degen things like go to electronic music festivals and take ecstasy and acid there and probably bang sluts. i immediately thought he would be charming enough to bang That Woman. i dont think he did, and of course that was just my insecurity. bottom line is, he was a smart and very capable guy worthy of a more than 15 an hour job.

i randomly see his linkedin and see that he worked as a temp contract for this one company that ive been meaning to apply for the job, and he describes it as basic data entry (awesome) where he was a top performer and instructed by management to help train people to do their job better. there was a possibility to make it a temp to perm, BUT he got passed up because he had only been there 3 months. and i believe it was the perm job I saw on indeed and wanted to apply for.

why didnt he apply for the perm job? Im sure he did, and thats when they told him, sorry, you havent been here long enough, even though youre the top performer.

ok. so that means they never planned to hire externally. which is good. why not promote someone. or in this case, temp to perm.  and i am a fan of promoting from within. and yes seniority does mean something to me.

but i wish they wuld have found a way to keep him on because he is very capable and deserves a bigboy job. his big career objective is just to become a damn tier 2 already because he is sick of being tier 1 support. answering stupid calls in a call center. 1 year at our place, 4 years at goddamn COMCAST, he should be made a SAINT for that. GOD DAMN. all he wants to do is get off tier 1 phones. and he is more than deserving.  but noooooooo.  thats too much for a smart white boy to ask. also he has very good people skills.

now i didnt trust him because i saw him as direct competition for That Woman, and also I think he is a Recovering Autist who probably made a conscious effort to become so Charming, and i am jealous of people who have actually succeeded in that struggle, where i have failed hahaha.

i have been looking for some fresh funeral doom metal and esoteric might be good. i have heard about them for 20 years (well, maybe 15 hahahaha) but never actually listened to them.

anyway. that guy deserves a decent job off the phones but i hate how women can Spread So Easy for someone with just a little bit of charm. well, he was kinda handsome too. there should be a law hahahaha. dont spread for a man until you have known him a YEAR. they say the Mask Slips after a year hehehehe.

heh my mask didnt slip. i didnt have ulterior motives. i just got a new mask hahahaha. no i was never wearing a mask with her. my FACE changed. damn. and she can go spread her coont for charming handsome men from tinder. i bet this guy is on tinder hahahaha.

but damn 4 years answering phones at comcast, he’s entitled to anything he wants after that living hell.

but yeah should give this one a fair chance too, of course im familiar with the name for the past 10 years or more hahaha.

yeah i just hate not knowing what to do, and the people who do know are too busy to really help you, and push you to figure it out, which all wouldnt be so bad if you had some actual time and didnt have the person waiting on hold for you to explain the shit to them!

contacted to do a written test for part time city job which pays 15 an hour and i would LOVE to get.

so stupid though. there is only one chance to take the test. they get like 20-30 people in a room to take the test all at once. people have lives and families. you can schedule an interview, why cant you schedule the test. it REALLY smacks of making people jump through obviously pointless hoops. i hope they are not promising somebody else this job and REALLY making us al jump through hoops even more than i am thinking!

thing is, i already went through TWO testing sessions with city HR for another very very very similar job. a 4 hour written test session with 2 tests that were very similar. another 2 hour session on word and excel. 2 or 3 interviews, i cant even remember. and still nothing.

why cant they use my “scores” from those previous tests and just call me in for a fookin INTERVIEW?

when in the end, even if i get an interview, theyll be like, oh yeah dont pick him, he’s got a long gap.

but i am damn sure counting this as .5 of an interview to add to my count there!

the only thing that could make this stupider is if they are interviewing for an ELIGIBILITY LIST for Possible Jobs in the Future. I recall there was an actual goddamn posting.

but what did the posting say…….

oh fuggggg. it does say that. it is for a goddamn eligibility list. that lasts for 2 years. well at least its 2 years and not 6 months hahahahaha.

maybe GOD is calling me to be permanently unemployed just as he is calling me to never have a white waifu and white children.

maybe GOD is calling me to have a nonwhite waifu and nonwhite children!!!!!

because we know GOD WORKS IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS!!!!!!!!

that would be SO BAD though. Why cant GOD respect the white race? there are other God Worshippers who are able to be pro-white! AYO HOL UP! R U TELLIN ME GOD isn’t actually pro-white?

that would suck!

 

heheheh his family and friends still like his ex gf AND the other man and dont care that she cheated on him with the other man. i hope reddit doesnt tell him to “just get over it you controlling jealous abuser” because this literally is stupid and offensive hahaha.

thankfully reddit agreed, yes this bitch is evil, give your family an ultimatum and tell them to stop being friends with her.

you never know with reddit.

this funeral doom sounds bretty good

just got into the mood for some slow funeral doom, no excuses no apologies. but i want it to be kinda pure. like no black metal in there. not ruling out the desire for funeral doom with a touch of black metal. see: abyssmal sorrow? something like that. warning: might have drum machine, i HATE drum machines in metal. also this band lycus. def no drum machine there.

i mean it might be time to break out the EVOKEN hahahaha.

i remember when i was in high school first finding out about black metal and doom metal, EVOKEN were a new and exciting band, and i was on board with them before “quietus” came out, IE 15 years + ago hahahaha. then i lost track of them.

music schmusic who cares really. i wonder what these guys do for work hahahaha. probably make 70k a year in skilled trades hahahaha and have 3 kids apiece, nice white wives. WELL GOOD FOR THEM.

then they shouldnt abandon their families to be in a metal band, EVEN IF they are in one of the Best Current Funeral Doom Metal Bands.  not even Good Music is worth abandoning families over.

but they only do 1 album every 4 years. maybe they dont abandon their families.

well, i hope not.

heh. once i wrote a review of either “quietus” or “embrace the emptiness”, one of my tryhard 10,000 word reviews, and the band liked it and put it on their website. that was pretty neat. this was no later than 2001 hahaha.

so evoken if you are reading this, NEVER ABANDON YOUR FAMILIES. TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR CHILDREN. BE GREAT FATHERS TO THEM. retire from the band if it ever becomes an either or thing.  your childrens well being is worth more than any DOOM METAL.

says a guy who likes doom metal and has been an evoken fan for 17 years hahahahahahaha. i get it. if anyone gets it, i do, hahahaha. i love black metal and some doom metal hehehehe.

but you know what i luv more than black metal and doom metal?

HUHWHYTE FAMILIES!!!!!! WHITE WAIFUS AND WHITE CHILDREN!!!!!!!!!!!!

So yeah I really dont WANT God to call me to be single & childless OR have a nonwhite waifu OR nonwhite children.

i took a 50% dose of nyquil hhehehehe

got 3 job applications in today and 6.8 miles of powerwalking. netcalories of 1044 with goal of 1200. so ok i guess it was good day right. welp would have liked to do more job apps or gotten more calories off. but when you want to do BOTH, i guess its not too bad. really the more important thing is job. i should stop trying to lose weight. but would easing up on that REALLY improve my job search THAT much? i dunno.

 

 

GAS THE NORMIES NEET UPRISING NOW

july 23

had weird nightmare that people were gradually being taken over by aliens. like body snatchers but they didnt look like humans at all, they looked more like Giant HR Giger Xenomorphs.

funny that you seem to be sleeping the deepest when you are having a terrifying nightmare that you WANT to wake up from. normally you LIKE and WANT to be sleeping deeply. but not now.

is it a good or a bad thing when an employer makes you  print out and sign an application and makes you come in to the office between 4:30pm to drop off the physical papers?

it sounds embarrassingly behind the times, like you’re hiding behind this outdated procedure and will keep the best candidates away.

but there’s also the argument that its a barrier to entry that will keep the WORST candidates away.

so, are you keeping away GOOD candidates, or keeping BAD candidates away?

probably BOTH tbh. you just snip off the outlying tails: the very best AND the very worst.

is it worth it?

but then this is a municipal position where quality is not necessarily necessary!

but companies can be inefficient as fook TOO. and managers much more incompetent than the people they manage.

well, the BEST candidates will eventually find jobs anyway, and probably not without having to go thru 20 interviews, or submitting six hundred applications.

in other words, i am more bad than good hahahaha. on the bad side of the bell curve hehehehe. below average. how do below average people get jobs? by looking for BELOW AVERAGE JOBS.

having an honest perception of what YOUR value on the market really is.  be like, i’m not worth much, and I know it.

but i kinda want the municipal, unionized, 37.5 hours a week, job, so i will follow their EMBARRASSINGLY OUTDATED policies of printing out the pdf.

do they just not KNOW how to accept applications electonically? there are LOTS of people out there who dont know how 2 email, how to add attachments to an email, cant grok how to make passwords for an account. hell no will they know how to set up a pdf to accept a verified signature.

shit you dont even NEED a signature. you can just type in your full name, or check this box to act as your signature.

or just email a god damn resume and cover letter and be done with it.

but noooooooooooooooooo.

I’ve got to PRINT OUT SIXTEEN PAGES and do a signature in ink.

but its a 34k job. kind of out of my league no?

yeah well i have recently interviewed for a 40k a year job mother fooker hahahaha.

aaannnnddd the professional woman i interviewed with on wednesday is not gonna accept my linkedin invite, even though she has 250 connections. well i didnt EXPECT her to anyway. but i am still ENTITLED to call her a bitch hahahaha even though my EXPECTATIONS were MANAGED hahahaha.

the LANGUAGE these people speak! so gay. GAY.wav. YOU FAIRY.wav.

http://www.realmofdarkness.net/pc/sb/pacino/3

oh lord soundboards hahahahahaha

i dont care if david mamet is a HUGE joo, this is still a great movie.

stands the test of time better than woody allens immoral filth.

i am thinking david mamet is way more moral than woody allen.

hopefully. i’m certainly willing to throw mamet in the oven too if he doesnt pass the test.

thats emblematic of muh confusion and weakness, i used to be a HUGE woody allen fan. I thought his neurotic bullshit was SOPHISTICATED and INTELLIGENT.

i still dont really want to crap on “hannah and her sisters”, prob my fav allen film.

but i can definitely crap on it where needed. like its never ok to cheat on your wife with your wifes sister. or to cheat on your boifran with your sisters husband. and woody allen attempting to write goy characters is more insulting and patronizing than women writing male characters hahahaha.  he makes the goys so weak and jooish rather than strong and proud.

absolutely no need to watch woody’s homages to bergman, just watch bergman instead, and there’s big problems with bergman too. he was a white goy but imho he symbolizes sweden becoming jooified. behind every swede there is a joo rubbing his hairy merchant hands hahahaha. be like the poles and throw the bums out.

it’s hard to see all this when you are a 20 year old child swept up in the romanticism of it all.

so youre a jooish neet offended by my anti jooishness? too bad. have your rich father get you a job and get you expensive psych md’s. go to the jcc and bang 18 year jooish sluts. become a counselor at joocamp and bang the female joocamp counselors. just dont get butthurt when theyre banging all the other male counselors. and administrators.

its easier for whites to become neets than joos, because in the current year, joos have a better social support system. your whole family can be poor white trash doing meth and drinking moonshine. there’s no counterpart in the jooish community. every joo has a rich uncle or cousin. doctors, lawyers, executives, business owners. shit you could probably get a job in israel too.  i have no desire to help joos. they have enough help. my fellow goyim are the ones who NEED help in this area.

the fatherland made a good point in epsidoe 36 (i think), the one with jeronimus guest and in fatherland after dark hour 3, they talked about “The BQ” and using MJ.

they made the good point that even though MJ is degenerate, you dont need to get into a Purity Spiral about it, and if you Do MJ once a year to help you Bond Deeper with your Wife, that is fine. Exec Producer Bradan “Killer of Dogs” tells story about how he was having marital trouble so they went to a church sponsored marriage retreat. there was an implied point which I would have made explicit: oh you mean his wife didnt just leave him when the going got tough? she was willing to go get marital help with him, and put in effort to WORK through the tough times? good.

anyway part of the thing was they got a night in a nice hotel, so they decided to go to the washington state legal MJ dispensary and get some brownies to spice up the night. they had a lot of fun and did not turn into degen MJ zombies like 75% of MJ users.

point is, degen things, in MODERATION, are not so bad.

except being a slut and giving up secs to strangers easily. but that was never on the table. these are men doing degen things in strcit moderation with their LONGTERM MONOG WIVES.

like the idea of doing Butt Stuff with your Wife just once to say you did it. totally different than crazy butt sluts getting random bar badbois to do me in the ass.

they mentioned a degenerate bar that was doing a “walk of shame” promotion by giving free bloody marys to any woman who showed a receipt for PLAN B purchase. we all agreed that was absolutely disgusting.

i felt bad for jeronimus because he didnt have the best showing. he could have done a lot better and I think he was just having an off day. he sounded a bit like an autist and also was not talking where his opinion would have been very welcome by me.

i can relate. like where you just have a BAD DAY and then the whole world judges you for that. and you know you’re having a bad day but you just can’t shake it. you just have to survive through it, try to get good sleep, and hopefully tomorrow will be better. but when everyone is judging you and thinking youre a loser and an autist and an ubermensch and a neet just because you’re having a bad day and you can’t communicate quite right…….that SUCKS.

its HARD to be at the top of your communication game at all times, especially when talking to people all day.

that’s why I will always accept emails as valid form of communication too hahahahaha. shit, take a few days and email me when you are having a better day.

so i gotta drive out there during working hours, which normies could not do, print out 16 pages of paper, which could probably cost 1$ to mail which normies would have to do, then pay 25c at the parking meter hahaha. just to Drop Off a job application.

hungary. another great country. white as hell. weird asian language but that hasnt stopped finns from being great. and hungarians are probably less asian than finns ahahahahahhahaha.

you know your gf is at least a 7 when you can honestly say you would LIKE to see her in a bathing suit, especially a 2-piece “bikini” type. if the thought makes you cringe…..she is below a 7 for sure. and i would never want to be with that type of woman long term, or Create New Life with her!

yeah physical attraction is crude, but its necessary even for a principled moral nondegenerate. needless to say, i found That Woman very attractive. technically she was a 7, but 7 is still pretty good, and with my luv for her, she skyrocket to an 8, 9, or 10. WIFE GOGGLES. LUV GOGGLES. I would have LUVED to see her in a bathing suit. all that soft white flesh.

people are FAT because they are so busy WORKING they dont have TIME to eat and be healthy. Since they are WORKING 60 hours a week at least, having working lunches, all they can do is get fast food, and INHALE the fast food while they do their WORK. and THAT is why people are morbidly obese.  and then even if all you did after you got out of work between work and bed, was exercise, it wouldnt be enough to burn off all that god damn mcdonalds you ate like a pig. an overworked pig hahahaha.

its not uncommon for people to have heart attacks and die on the job, i learned. doesnt have to be a physical job at all. they just need to be fat and unhealthy and older. spend all day eating fast food, drinking soda, dealing with 90000 angry customers, and you giving them the runaround on their confusing issues because it costs too much to fix the problem with your shitty product and erything is a goddamn charade, you get stressed out, boom heart attack dead.

great. how fancy do i have to dress up for dropping off a damn application? i mean its the hottest part of the summer (which i am very thankful for, i luv hot weather), its 90 degrees out there so….

i mean i will dress up for the job, i will dress up for an interview and wear a suit coat in 90 degree waether while i wipe my forehead with paper towels, but dropping off an application? i havent dropped off an application in 3 years hahahaha. and that was for a damn municipal job too. noticing a pattern here. cities are inefficient and incompetent hahahaha and only survive because they are public tax supported leviathans.

kinda want to get some sun early in the afternoon. like 1 pm.

ok did that. did 2.8 mile powerwalk in 95 degree weather, about 55 minutes, got some good sun, vitamin d, took shower.

sheeeeit. 1 year into The Recovery and only now am I realizing that SHE DIDNT KNOW ME AS WELL AS I THOUGHT SHE DID.

In other words WE WERENT AS CLOSE AS I THOUGHT WE WERE.

I thought we were close because I knew alot about her. women don’t usually let me get that close. (but they spread their life creators for random men for instant gratification like ingras.)

really? you think its SPECIAL that a WOMAN is TALKING ABOUT HERSELF?

heh well i did because she didnt seem like a narcissist exhibitionist and actually had a private life.

but point im trying to make, did she really know ME? HELL NO!!! She didnt know about my past with women, she didnt know the story of muh high school and college years, she didnt know that much about my life prior to when i started working at the easy job with her.

i mean, i dont really LIKE talking about these things with people, and she didnt really want to PRY them out of me. the result is, she didn’t know ME NEARLY as wel as I knew HER.

and yeah that was my fault. mostly.

but it also explains how she could forget about me a LOT easier than I could forget about her. she didnt really KNOW me.

hehehehe it’s not really a POSITIVE, feelgood realization hahaha.

maybe if she REALLY knew me, she would have DITCHED me a LOT EARLIER.

and THAT would have been GOOD because it would have saved me a lot of pain!

lesson: make sure they know YOU just as much as you know THEM. if they are telling you intimate things about themselves, return the favor with telling them intimate things about you.

nobody told me that being a WEIRDO would make you a loser with women and with friends…….but it would ALSO affect your ability to MAKE A LIVING as nobody wants to HIRE a WEIRDO.

NOBODY WANTS TO HIRE A WEIRDO. 

heheheh.

thing is, i’m not THAT weird, i am just shy and quiet and boring and lame. i am not a total psychopath, i just have really low quality. like an ahtlete with a really low rating. im just shitty at everything hahahahaha.

too boring, too shy, too wimpy, too quiet, too prudish, too nervous, too awkward, too lame.

also you GOT to have something wrong with you to be 30+ years old and never had a REAL gf. theres a huge red flag there!

so because of THAT people think I am a psycho weirdo creep…..but really I never had a GF because I not too weird, but just didn’t quite make the grade. like a DUD. almost made the minimum, but not quite.

he’s not a PSYCHO, he’s just BELOW THE MINIMUM, hahahahahaha.

why would a company keep re-posting a job like a month later?

why would they delete all the resumes they were sent the first time around?

because none of the 1000 resumes the first time were good enough?

they are holding out for a better candidate, than the 1000 candidates they have got so far?

why not just call the best person out of that 1000?

because the best person out of that 1000 wasn’t good enough, so now they’re gonna try to get a NEW 1000?

or is it just Job Growth Theater? its not a real job opening? they don’t intend to EVER fill this “job?” it just makes it LOOK like their company is doing well, or the economy is doing well?

you think their Office Manager even knows? you’d have to talk to the area manager or president or ceo or board. and you aren’t gonna talk to them. you can’t.

and even if you COULD, you think they’d tell YOU? Joe Flabeetz off the the Streetz?

thinking about recreationally using nyquil during the day, same way I would smoke an MJ if i had some.

no, OF COURSE i would not go over the dosage because im aware of the dangers of acetominophen, unlike women or nonwhites.

so bradan fatherland is like 40 years old and has only done MJ like 3 times in his life. and he lives in damn washington where its LEGAL. i dont think we need to worry about HIM. No I like him a lot, he is very laid back and much less autistic than jim, and probably more fun to hang out with hahahaha.

i mean i really like all the guys on the show. ryan no1 i might have the most mancrush on because he is a total alpha male, very charismatic, and probably has an attractive 7 or above wife hhahahaha. and otto just seems like a very nice, friendly, down to earth guy. jim is the most ridiculous and autistic, but he’s a good guy too.

but i also think about george feels. so he lives in colorado and DOESNT do MJ, that says a lot in my book. ANYONE who lives in a legal weed state and isnt 420 blaze it all day long. not that thats a good thing! its DEGENERATE to use MJ every day! smoke weed erry day! THATS DEGENERATE AF!!!!! but i can totally understand it, IVE BEEN THERE, and I might go back there again. it TEMPTS me like none other.

George feels, i think it might help him tho. prob better than him drinking. not that he drinks THAT much. oh you drank 5 beers last night. get back to me when you are drinking at least 12 beers a day. and go on binges where you stay up all night drinking over a Fifth of Hard Booze getting wasted AF. I dont think george does this. he drinks 4 or 5 ciders or guinesses a few nights a week and feels all guilty about it. he’s not even driving around drunk hahahaha.

get back to me when you are drinking cheap malt liquor, cheap bottom shelf whiskey, or cheap boxed wine.

people who want to get drunk so bad they will drink steel reserve WARM.

just the thought of it makes me nauseous now. thank god. that is the proper reaction.

this is why i like podcasts with 2 people having an interview or conversation. they can pull you out of Downward Spirals of Negative Thoughts, and you can do the same for them. Which is why i think it would be a real neat thing for me to have a Skype Talk with George Feels.

more than 2 people, it gets tricky, like on the fatherland. then some people dont talk so much. 3 is do able but 4 is prob too much.

same deal with the millennial woes hangouts. prob why i stopped listening to those. just too many damn people.

2 people is my sweet spot.

HA, company wants references who are NOT former employers/managers, but who have been your NEIGHBORS for 3 to 5 years. Apparently Eggy got butthurt at this and was rude to the recruiter hahahaha.

i have seen a few applications ask for Non Work References, so I just used the same Work References as usually do. I never had a real life recruiter ask for them though.

well eggy will be blacklisted by that recruiter…..but recruiters are bullshit anyway basically meant to keep people AWAY from jobs. more job theater. i mean they never get back to you anyway. except maybe with eggy they put a note in his file saying this guy is an autist who got angry at the recruiter. if they even have a system for cases. candidate tracking system. they just throw everything away hahahaha. SORRY WE HAVE NO RECORD OF THAT.

just curious. WHY do recruiters ask for non work related references?

to paint a FULLER PICTURE of you than employers can give? to really know what kind of person you are? to screen out weirdos and neets and autists that do good work but are antisocial and weird? again, its all bullshit designed to turn people AWAY. they REALLY DONT CARE. NEVER has a non work related reference MADE THE DIFFERENCE. i just want to see the kind of bullshit the recruiters say about why they do this jooery.

http://www.askamanager.org/2013/04/why-do-employers-ask-for-personal-references-rather-than-professional-ones.html

i actually respect and sort of trust askamanager’s opinion. and she agrees personal references are BULLSHIT. THANK YOU.

ok just had some nyquil. 6.11 pm.

today is the type of PERFECT DAY to go to the lake. 90 degrees all day, HOT and sunny. i wanted to go to the lake but i didnt want to go alone. and i couldnt think of anyone i wanted to go to the lake with……except YOU KNOW WHO. and i havent talked to her in a YEAR.

what would alpha male do? just go to the lake alone and then make tons of hawt young female friends when he shows up by being all charismatic.

COMPANIES should run SCHOOLS. currently schools, even GOOD schools, can’t guarantee that you will be employable. if Companies Ran Schools For Children, K-12, this wouldn’t happen.

If Companies Ran Schools….well at the very least the kids would be prepared for a job at that company hahahaha.

schools would just be 12 years of job training.

why dont they just do that?

but then again, i am a fooking OUTLIER. most normies who go to normie skool get normie jobs.  i am only speaking for 1% of the popular. the real WEIRDOS.

but I’m not a WEIRDO, I’m just SUBPAR, hahaha. SUBMINIMUM.  just Not Good Enough, Unfortunately.  Not what we were looking for, sorry.

well, thank you for saying sorry at least! hahahaha.

instead of saying B+ or B or A in your job bookmarks, i have started putting like B+, APPLY!!! in them, so I know which ones I am more serious about applying for. because that’s all that REALLY matters. am I REALLY gonna apply to this one or not. Some job you know right away. those you put APPLY!!! in the bookmark title so you can spot them quickly, when you are ready to apply for a few jobs and want to take a break from scouring the damn indeed list of fake jobs hahaha.

i thought about how i wanted to take HER to the lake and beach and stare at her big pale white ass in a bathing suit and then have luving but masculine pair bonding secs with her.

then i thought, well she’s just doing that with someone else now. well, she’s probably working at her new job, making 16 dollars an hour, which i can never hope to make. and shell have a long hard day and then see her new boifran and night and get some long hard dick to relieve all that stress.

FINE. you can take all the dicks you want. just TREAT ME THE WAY YOU WOULD WANT TO BE TREATED. TREAT ME LIKE A HUMAN BEING WITH FEELINGS AND A HEART. JUST BE NICE TO ME.  you can take all the black cok you want, just BE NICE to me when you dump me.

If i were to do skypes, i’d do one with george feels, def do one with millennial woes, do some with these guys from depression forums. maybe one with a fatherland guy. hahahaha assuming any of those guys would say yes to the idea hahahaha.

i have two main interests apart from muh own navelgazing: huhwhyte nationalist and loser neet feels hahahaha. maybe GOD wants me to combine the two.

well, lemme just say I’m very comfortable speaking for the loser neet feels community. I am NOT comfortable at all speaking for the other community.  i just CANT. they dont want losers speaking for them, shit I dont want losers speaking for them, as a loser I dont WANT to speak for them.

maybe GOD is trying to teach me a lesson to not be racist, and he is gonna answer my prayers in a mysterious way. like i want to have a white waifu and have white children, maybe what GOD will do is send me a stumpy potatoey laotian single mother and i will get to be a surrogate father to her asian bastards, to teach me that Race doesn’t really matter, and that you can love children who aren’t your children as if they ARE your children.

and I would say to the LORD, sorry but thats just not good enough. I asked for WHITE children. white biological children of my own. that was the MINIMUM. you gave me SUB MINIMUM. I do not accept your halfass answer to my prayers. dont you have a QUALITY department hahahahaha. this one is a DUD, hahaha. NOT GOOD ENOUGH. GOTTA DO BETTER, LORD.

the lord works in mysterious ways. sometimes to our prayers he says yes, sometimes he says no, and sometmes he says NOT YET. OR, i’m gonna answer your prayer, but in a totally different way than you expected. you want a wife, i’m gonna send you an ugly nonwhite white to teach you lesson about not being racist and lookist.  its only the NONRACIST people that get wives of their own race, hahahaha. they don’t have any lessons they needed to learn

discipline. being able to do things you don’t like doing, because you HAVE to do them.

of course i try to JOO this by saying, well, i’ll DO it, just dont expect a good job.

NOPE. it STILL has to have good quality. no slacking on quality. DISCIPLINE is not only about doing things when you dont want to do them………but still doing them WELL. HORRY SHEET.

i am an expert in grudgingly, half assedly doing stuff, because i dont like it, i dont want to do it.

yet i dont get good results, because i do the stuff half assed! like maybe i am half assing all these 300 job appliations, because I am not painstakingly crafting every application to the job. because i am only spending 12 minutes per application rather than 30 minutes per application.  i have my Plug And Play sentences in my cover letter…..but the WHOLE COVER LETTER isnt tailored. BUT MAYBE IT SHOULD BE.

but yeah. funny that if two despairers are talking to each other, you can help pull back the other person from spiralling down into despair, being nice to them. but you cant do that with yourself!!!!!! this is a very interesting thing. there is something we can learn and use here.

namely, me talking here, or george making solo videos, is just beating a dead horse, a despair spiral. there needs to be checks and stop signs and guardrails and such to keep us from going off the track. and you can even have another despairer do that for you! they can help others better than they can help themselves!

and i think this is pretty cmmon among despairers!

so maybe this is the ultimate cure for despair: to help other people with despair.

and yeah thats the stated mission of this blog, always has been……..but in reality, its just been me whining about my own bullshit hahahaha rather than helping others.

oh eggy growing his nice long hair. i used to have nice long hair. but i was still a weird creep virgin. then i cut my hair and i sorta got some confidence briefly. then i wanted to grow my hair out again. but it was too late. i had quickly gone bald before age 30.  BRUTAL. shit i STILL might grow the SIDES long hahahaha.

its really not THAT weird for men to have barely any experience with women, like be 30+ and have never had a serious gf. but WOMEN think its WEIRD AS HELL, because they dont appreciate the natural differneces between men and women, and it IS realy weird for a woman to make it to 30 without having a serious boifran.

because women dont have to DO anything.

WOMEN ARE THE SUPPLY, MEN ARE THE DEMAND.

women just do NOT understand this, and men understand it at least implicitly.

sex, relationships, luv, dating, cuddles, affection, making out, anything in that ballpark. women are the supply, men are the demand.

THE SUPPLY CANT DEMAND ITSELF.

The demand can’t supply itself, hahahahaha.

when the demand is high and the supply is low, the price is HIGH AS FOOK.

and the demand will NEVER be low, and the supply will NEVER be high.

well, the supply COULD be higher.  supply of good, decent, marriageable women that is.

july 24

deicide “stench of redemption” 2006 is seen as something of a comeback ater replacing old guitar players  with new ones. i liked a couple decide albums up to “serpents of the light” which i remember when that one came out when i was a total adolescent teen.  SotL was pretty good, then they went on an embarrassingly decline and I just STAHPPED and started listening to opeth and became too cool for deicide. then of course opeth became uncool and uninspired and boring and lame.

now i dont listen to music becuase music is dgenerate hahahaha.

but seriously i dont really care about music made after 2005 and there is plenty of stuff i missed the first time around. like the deicide “legion” album. or sepultura “schizophrenia”. or fookin racist russian black metal bands hahahaha.

i mean seriously. i should be the worlds biggest NSBM fan hahahahaha.

had some nyquil yesterday at like 6 pm, went to bed at 9:30 pm, slept pretty good, did not get out of bed till like 9:30 am, this is pretty standard for nyquil hahaha.

spent all sunday afternoon reading damn metal reviews hahaha.

ok the albums of the day are deicide legion

i never listened to this album and always knew it as “the most technical” deicide album. but decide was never a very technical band! i am really looking for old skool death metal that is br00tal and heavy. hoping there is a heavy guitar sound and blast beats. i am also trying to get a better feel for steve asheim as a drummer, since most people say he is a good drummer, but how good is he really? but i am also looking for something lowbrow, sincere, and badass.

of course later on “technical death metal” became a thing, (gorguts?) and “brutal death metal” became another thing (devourment?) so I am fully aware of that. which is also why i wanted to go back to 1992 before all that shit even existed.

other albums of today:

sepultura: schizophrenia and arise

axis of advance: strike

angelcorpse: exterminate

morbid angel: covenant

niden div 187: impergium

you know i bet at least 20% of men are like me, basically virgins who never had a gf, and women think it is SO WEIRD, BUT IT REALLY ISNT! 20% of men are like us……but women have never met any of us!

the mysterious leader of deathspell omega, hasjarl, is really a 37 year old man named christian bouche who owns a real estate company called sci trident or something and probably is a total EXTRAVERT NORMIE talking to CLIENTS all day and wearing a tailored SUIT and SMILING and Closing deals and making 100k a year and drives a NICE car and wears NICE clothes and probably has an ATTRACTIVE GF from all the money he’s making in real estate hahahahahaha. so how can you take his kvlt music seriously now hahahaha.

well DsO hasnt been relevant since 2012 anyway hahahahahahaha. why did they just STOP suddenly? did he just run out of steam? get too busy making money?

i am being facetious. i hope he makes plenty of money and more importantly, has plenty of white children and doesnt waste any more time on “orthodox satanism.” no such thing for a grown ass white man to be doing.

but again they havent done a damn thing since 2012. cuz he is too busy making money and having secs with attractive wimmin like a NORMIE hahahahaha.

so anyway thats my big thing for this post:

25% of men are 30 year old kissless virgins like me who never had a gf.  it’s NOT THAT WEIRD. women only think its weird because by DEFINITION, because all women have been In Rels, they’ve never really met one of these millions of men! also the men aren’t shouting this from the rooftops, because they are ashamed. they don’t talk about it with women. well i say they should! we should come out of the closet and tell every woman we know that we are huge virgins who never had a gf, just so women, and people in general, but especially women, and to us ourselves, we can see that we ARENT THAT WEIRD!

where am i getting this 25% number? i cant prove it……but YOU CANT PROVE IT EITHER!!!!!!

All about the seed of doubt. i don’t think I could say 50% of men. but 20 or 25%, yeah sure!

of COURSE none of the men women have fooked are VIRGINS! because theyre FOOKING them!!!!!

you’d have to look at the male orbiter friends of the women. certainly they are ashamed of being virgins, and the vain women doesn’t care enough to know.

see, you women ALREADY KNOW some Male Virgins Who Never Had A GF, you just never cared enough to ask! but yeah a good 30% of your Beta Orbiters are Virgins!

You think thats WEIRD? then cut them off of orbiting you! DO THEM A FAVOR!

and do it nicely too! but also be honest! be like, you’re not a bad guy, and this isn’t your fault. its MY fault. but there is NO chance between you and me. its not RIGHT for me to keep leading you on like this. its not RIGHT to use people for the attention and adoration. i will NEVER be your GF. find a woman who will.

heh. its like ive become more hateful against all women, after this one woman.

yet when i was getting along with that one woman, i wasn’t nearly as hateful towards all women. i was more balanced, less hateful.

basically i need to be getting along with at least one woman in order to “humanize” women for me, to show me that not all women are horrible, AND to give me the confidence that I CAN get along with a woman, and am not some Huge Weird Virgin who Repels Women.

it’s hard to not think like that when I don’t have any female friends hahahaha. no evidence to the contrary.

went for 4.2 minle pwoerwalk. listend to arise and legion. arise has great heavy guitar sound. i probably didnt fully understand or appreciate this when i first heard it when i was young and i preferred the “groove” stuff like chaos ad.  yes, i did like “roots.” NO, I did not like “against.” I had the first soulfly album but I didnt super like it. but it was better than “against” hahaha. but after that sepultura became shameful and max became shameful and I forgot that, together, they USED to be a force to be VERY reckoned with. like on “arise.” great metal album for any metal fan.

deicide legion was….also early 90s scott burns stuff. the first deicide i ever heard was “once upon the cross” 1995, which was sorta new at the time, and i remember seeing it in the record store and being frightened of how blasphemous and evil the cover was. like wow this deicide band is the most extreme thing ever. then my friend got the album and i made a tape of it because i was too scared to actually buy the album hahaha. but i enjoyed the album and it was my first real taste of Death Metal. and then serpents of the light came out and i was fully on board with that one. also listened to their live album which came out after that, it was a great live album. “when satan lives.” and also listened to their first album a bit. but totally skipped over “legion.”

so i listened to it today and it was pretty good. super distorted and kinda sloppy guitars. the bass mixes well with it though, you can always hear the bass rumbling.  drums sound pretty good, hold the chaos together. benton sounds hateful but not as intimidating as he did on “once upon the cross”, here he sounds more human. no he sounds fine, no problems there.

but yeah OUTC and SOTL are definitely more catchy than this. better riffs. but legion definitely has replay value. some MJ would help though. and I bet it sounds better loud on good speakers.

see i think goatwh0re knows how to get really good production. the stuff is clear, and heavy, and not super polished. but the guitars sound way heavier than say “legion.” although their newer stuff is not as Inspired as their Older Stuff. also their drums are never clicky. this is how guitars and drums should sound IMHO. basically if all metal albums sounded like that, I would be happy. purists will say its not raw enough. i saw it’s plenty raw enough. if it sounds TOO raw then it stops being HEAVY and just sounds like CARDBOARD.

Women think its SO WEIRD when a guy is a virgin and or nevergf. Theyre like EW WEIRD uh NO I never met any weirdos like that. Well shit yeah you have. every guy you rejected as being too nice or too weird. just look at your orbiters. if you treated your orbiters as people and ACTUALLY GOT TO KNOW THEM, you would find that some of them are virgin nevergfs.

TREAT PEOPLE LIKE PEOPLE.

YES the orbtiers are dumb for orbiting around you like a servile puppy dog, but if you were a virgin nevergf desperate for a gf, youd do the same thing too.

GET TO KNOW YOUR ORBITERS. you will be surprised at what you learn. you could learn soemthing from their lives of quiet desperation hahahaha. gain some sympathy for nevergfs who are just lonely as fook. learn more about the nevergf/neverrel life. shit yeah its scary. be thankful that you will never know it. but you SHOULD make an effort to learn about it. because its the life many of your orbiters live, and you dont even KNOW.

NEVERGF. WE ARE LEGION. EXPECT US.

aajjajajaja. 25% of men baby.

well, it doesnt MATTER if a 16 year old or 18 year old boy is a virgin. it really starts being “WEIRD” around age 25. so, lets say 25% of men over 25 are nevergf virgins. there. BELIEVE IT.

IF YOU TOOK THE TIME TO TREAT PEOPLE LIKE PEOPLE AND ACTUALLY GET TO KNOW THEM as people rather than adoration-showering objects, you’d see that you actually know a LOT of male nevergf virgins! ITS NOT THAT WEIRD!

hey it wasnt for lack of trying! I WANTED To make it work! THEY NEVER WANTED to make it work! They just wanted to WALK OUT and BAIL and leave me in the LURCH.

I didnt BAIL on the relship, THEY did!!!!!!! I wanted to put in the WORK, THEY didn’t!!!!!

thats why i am nevergf hahahaha.  its THEIR fault hahahahahaha.

when woman2012 dumped me (and she was VERY GOOD about it, but i was STILL upset), i was just starting to become friends with woman2015. I was getting along with her really well, but i couldnt even THINK of her like that, i was still obsessed with the other woman. but it was good that i could get along with a woman. talk to a owman normally. i don’t have that now. so i totally doubt my ability to talk to women, get along with women, have female friends, get along with women like human beings. i don’t have any of that at the moment like i did in 2012, 2013. 2014. some of 2015. although things were bad in 2015. worse than I even knew.

well i sorta get along with some women. i see peoples GF’s at my weekly social event. we are nice to eaach other and i do VERY small talk with them. but i had gotten closer to That Woman in ONE MONTH than i have gotten to any of these women. which isnt to say That Woman Moved FAST – just that we both got along really well and hit it off immediately and had small talk really easily and could just talk real easy about lots of stuff, in a way that I can’t just do with anybody and everybody. but some people CAN. especially women hahaha. they turn on the charm and make you feel special, but you’re really not hahahaha. how many guys has she done that with in the past year? how many new guys she fooked? met from dating sites? how many new omega virgin orbiters has she had that think they have such a special connection? how many chumps thought the same thing i did? WOW i just NEVER get along with WOMEN so well, this gurl is really SPECIAL!!!!!

but i can tell you she honestly wasnt a slut, was not an extravert, did not get out much, did not meet a lot of new people. at least back then. who knows what she’s become now. in the past year. and it just DOESNT MATTER because I will never know her again! but you can see i still want to!

i was thinking of getting hooker this year, maybe that would help. actually making the call wuld be the hardest.

also i would have to get a damn job of course.

get a damn job so i can buy MJ and get a hooker hahahahaha.

get blazed on MJ and then walk around for 2 hours listening to music and fatherland and george feels and self made podcasts of me reading Knowledge about whatever my ridic job is hahahahaha. trying to learn and know EVERYTHING so i am prepared for explaining the most ridiculous shit to angry callers day in day out. well WHY cant you help me. sorry just can. no you CANT speak to the supervisor. hes in a meeting. no we dont call people back.

why dont they teach THESE soft skills in schools? if COMPANIES ran schools, like they should……they WOULD!

heheheh why didnt SCHOOL teach me the things COMPANIES want in order to give me a JOB and PAY me ?!?!??!?!?! Like how to bullshit people who want to speak to a manager? like how to bullshit when something makes no sense but you have to handle it now and can’t pass it to someone else?

ht     tp://scottberkun.com/essays/53-how-to-detect-bullshit/

unfortunately, all the articles on the internet are on how to detect bullshit and how to destroy it…….not on how to CREATE IT CONVINCINGLY ON THE SPOT, UNDER PRESSURE, WHEN IT IS MOST NEEDED.

https://www.google.com/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=how%20to%20come%20up%20with%20bullshit%20explanations%20on%20the%20spot

googles got NOTHING hhahahaha.

i mean my bullshit detector is pretty good. i think EVERYTHING is bullshit hahahah. i dont LIKE bullshit. i hate it. i dont WANT to do it. I just HAVE To do it to survive on muh job.

no i dont! i havent done this in a YEAR!

george feels said that his father, who had been unemployed for THREE long years, complained about his previous job like it had just happened YESTERDAY. it was that unpleasant, and that fresh in his mind still. its like you can be permanently SCARRED, george noted.

i kinda have that. it has been over a year, yet I can remember that unpleasant feeling as clear as day.

too bad I can’t remember detailed STORIES that I can use in an INTERVIEW to show how AWESOME and SMART and cool under pressure I am!

but yeah it IS stupid and scary and sad that a bad job can almost SCAR you like this.  hope you never know that feel, GEORGE. check your unscarred privilege hahahaha.

all this stuff on the internet on how to DEAL WITH bullshit, but NOTHING on HOW TO bullshit. so how do all these bullshitters learn? it just comes NATURALLY to them? it must! cuz I don’t see a single article TEACHING somebody HOW TO bullshit. I would really like to read that article.

no, there is ONE article out there, and its OK, but I need MUCH MORE.

 

 

THIS IS HOW BABIES GET MADE

july 5

found some Grade A job postings, which is kinda rare, most jobs are B- or B. Grade A you actually CARE about not making any mistakes. so should I do those super fast to try to keep my Average down?

well, don’t waste time but dont necess RUSH like a spazz either?

completed careerbuilder apply in 9 minutes. QUICK. why cant they all be like that?

just like a damn bag of meat. we are all bags of meat. like that damn tool video hahahaha. or nine inch nails. where they open up this pipe and there is this disgusting meat slowly pushing through it like shit through a colon haha.

women complain about men watching porn, well the things women DO are WAY MORE degenerate! whats worse, some pathetic neet whacking off to jooish filth (yeah that is pretty bad, but not in any way the women understand) or the women actually going out and being Living Pornography to some sleazebag?

well, in both cases you are making a mockery of something sacred. but its worse when women do it because they can get pregnant. also it actually involves two people. and not just one pathetic man whacking off to j00ish filth.

because youre involving MORE than one person and making an even WORSE mockery of the life creation process. arguably hahaha.

like a person who wahcks off to pron all the time can still grasp the importance of actual secs. i did! even though i watched WAY TOO MUCH pron, i still didnt view actual secs in that way. I was nervous because I was like holy shit, THIS IS HOW BABIES GET MADE, so i am nervous about that, and also im nervous because ive never done this before. and how soon is SHE gonna dump me. pretty damn soon as it turned out hahaha.

went to shrink. mainly talked about job search. also try to talk a little bit about THAT PERSON. I figure better to call her that PERSON instead of that WOMAN because NOT ALL WOMEN are like that hahahaha.

i said i hate thinking i was a bad influence on that person, while she was a good influence on me.

shrink responded that she prob didnt think i was a bad influence, like a druggie or a loser, like the people she cut out of her life for being druggies and drunks and losers. i hated thinking i was a loser like them. especially since i am prone to think of myself as a loser anyway.

shrink said if anything i was one of the better influences in her life! but she dumped me because SHE didnt know how to HANDLE the situation! NOT because I was a loser!

and also, she was positive to me, but she was ALSO VERY negative to me. there was SO MUCH NEGATIVE hehehe.

here is what muh new spreadsheet looks like, just for educational purposes. those top rows are frozen. i am adding new stuff to the top of the list and just adding more rows as needed. the link is to the google stopwatch. not really needed.

WEWLAD

ALSO try to look up jobs for companies on LINKEDIN. like this bigass robotics company i could not find at all on indeed. have many jobs listed on linkedin,where i can see that plenty of alums from my highly selective univ are currently employed. probably engineers making 90k a year, having grad from muh highly selective u’s engineering skool like I shold have done……

also found a treasure trove of hospital jobs that i wasnt getting because they were posted too long ago but they are still open. when i worked at my until 2013 easy fun job, i worked with a nice friendly man around my age and we got along well. he complained about his bitchy sister who ended up getting a “super easy job” at this hospital. i of course asked him, tell me about that job, i want one too. I could never get the exact title from him, dont think he knew. well i stalked the whole family on linkedin recently and found her job title there. and find that there are like 5 positions with that title. bla bla analyst. they IDEALLY want a CS bachelors (NO, not customer service ya moron!) but if his party gurl airhead sister can get this job, any ingra with a pulse can.

looks like his brother is doing a similar job.

i dont know about the guy himself. cant find him on linkedin. he had some health problems that impacted his working life and he could very well probably get SS disability. but he was a real nice guy and we got along real well and I sometimed wish I had become friends with him hahaha. I still sometimes think about what he is doing. cuz he is gonna have even harder time than me. but he had a similar work ethic as me: he didnt want to K himself being a bitch for Joos hahahaha and just wanted to do an honest job for honest pay, that wasnt all sales or ALL customer service. i know he would have not enjoyed the call center hehehehe. neither did i friendo.

but yeah of COURSHE bla bla robotics is not gonna post jobs on INDEED, they need to showcase their CAREERS on LINKEDIN. sheeeeit. might as well look for a facebook developer job on snagajob.com hahahaha.

and i am not talking about poo in loo indian contractors making 1 dah in bangalore to flag offensive content. i am talking about asian americans with top stem degrees, in san jose making 200k a year Managing Projects.

july 6

welp big interview tomorrow. compliance specialist! I dont even know what that IS! I applied for many other jobs at this large multidepartmented institution of higher education hehehe. why couldnt one of the OTHER jobs have called me for an interview?

i guess the good lord likes testing/torturing me with confusing shit hahaha.

unfort Seeming Confused is the worst way to get a job. you have to be confident and very competent, or at least SEEM that way, which is hard for me, who has been Unemployed for a Year and Hasnt Made Out with a Woman in 10 Years hahaha.

pay band STARTS at 49k? and this guys an ACCOUNTANT and he decided to call ME for an interview? are people really THAT bad at “Talent Acquisition?” apparently. the office is full of what sounds like black women hahahaha. i guess this place is HUGE on Diversity in the Workplace. probably a reason why a fooking white male cant get a job there unless they are AWESOME, which unfort i am not.

oh well. go to the damn interview and present a confident demeanor like trumpenfuhrer1433.

there is a FOOKLOAD of carbs and sugar in coca cola and other soda hehehehe. it might not have as many calories as you might think, but the carbs and sugar are ridiculous. absolutely off the charts. i say this because i was brought a soda at muh social event and since the new year i have essentially given up soda, just getting water, and always specify water unless they bring me a darn soda. i also went way over the top eating a damn huge burger. it was a good burger but it was so heavy and calorie laden hehehe totally rekt muh diet and also disturbed muh sleep at night. NEVER AGAIN!

daniel radcliffe is playing a skinhead neo nazi hollywood nazi 1433 crowd in “imperium” which normies will never recognize as the title of yockey’s seminal book hehehehe and which i doubt the j00vie goes into any detail about

heh updated spreadsheet to have a goal of 400 jobs. now i have a percentage meter that creeps up by 0.25% whenever I finish one job app hahaha.

well THANK GOD for this spreadsheet, and giving me the idea to use this spreadsheet, because its made the job search a teensy bit more bareable, which I kinda needed. to get to god damn 400 jobs. even doing 10 a day that’s still 40 days.

but really at 14 minutes an app, I should be doing at LEAST 20 a day. so now that’s 20 days. hmmm.

and i know all this because of the spreadsheet.

ridic interview tomorrow, I found out SOME info about their “ecommerce marketplace” system and their software bla bla so I will make it sound like i did some homework. Will state the basical account equation and shit abotu debits and credits.

heh this was just in muh youtube window.

this could be good. apparently it is “blasphemy worship” and this might be the band that led up to teitanblood. maybe. could be confusing another “P” band.

i dunno they did a split with teitanblood, who seems more grim and serious. they are both from madrid area.

anyway i guess i just like that aesthetic. that type of artwork with black and white skeletons and goats and red band logo. and this album cover always stuck with me (above.)

or i could have been thinking of THIS album cover hahahahahahahaha

I woke up in the middle of the night with muh tummy hurt from eating too many hamburgers hahahaha and thought wow, i have literally failed at everything every. i am the real master of failure. everything i tried i have failed. everything important to me i have failed at. all the important things of life: women, relationships, friends, jobs, career, education, i’ve more or less failed at. i drank some pepto bismol and thankfully was able to get back to sleep.

and do a paltry 5 applications today. down to a darn 13 minute average but i fully expect that to go as high as 17 haha. 21 jobs in the spreadsheet so far.

shaved scruffy beard in anticipation of interview tomorrow.  electric shaver always misses some hairs so you need to go back and do it twice hahaha.

want to go for powerwalk here.

ok, did that, listened to some blasphemy and ritual killer and then new fatherland.

the blasphemy album is good fun despite not being able to discern any riffs. great “atmosphere” of wild raucous drunken evil blasphemy hahaha. but you can only listen to about 14.33 minutes at a time tops haha. because they dont seem like real actual songs.

i will lie and tell them tomorrow that I have a 30% chance at getting the nursing home payroll job, and also a 30% chance of getting the education/training center job. hehehehe.

is it this hard for other people? do they too have such a HARD TIME adapting to their jobs, doing their jobs……and getting the jobs? do they have to also apply to 400 jobs? do they have just as good of a system as me? with alerts ad spreadsheets and shit? 10 page packets to every posting? maybe thats WHY I’m only getting a 5% interview rate. WELL, no packet seemed to be about the SAME. I figure the Packet gives them more information IF THEY WANT IT. (references, letters of recommendation, unofficial transcripts.) in addition to the standard cover letter. also have a long resume in there of coursh.

and that person just finds a new job in a month. probably just yes to one of the RECRUITERS calling her looking for a body to stick in a seat. and she probably just say ok its just a job, it doesnt have to be FUN, it’s just take it until i can find something better, not the end of the world LOL. at least I have muh weed and all these men to play with hahahahaa.

whereas i am intentionally trying to stay away from phone jobs because the very word still strikes extreme fear in my heart. and i would rather go from 15 DAH to 12 DAH to not have to experience that again.

i have very low confidence but i still think i am smarter than average people. like average people doing average jobs. my prev job was tough as hell and these people were smarter than you thought. and I was STILL smarter than them. also it doesnt make you SMART when information is hidden and you have the “SILO MENTALITY”. where there are secrets and shit. that doesnt make you DUMB when you arent privy to the SECRETS.

of course its easier to learn the secrets when you are a 25 year old woman and everyone wants to fook you or marry you hahahaha.

i might not be smart as some autistic engineer, but im no idiot, am i?!?!?!?!?! why cant I just get a damn 14 dollar an hour job? or 12 dollar an hour full time mon thru fri 9 to 5 job?  not some “casual” “rotating shift” “no guaranteed hours” “this position is not intended for someone who wants health care benefits” 9.50 an hour 30 hour a week job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what do the power lifting skinheads in blasphemy do to make their 14 dollars an hour?

they probably dont and are on canadian disability and welfarebux hahaha and then spend the money on booze and drugs and come out with one album of unintelligible “songs” every 15 years hahahaha.

kinda hard to believe that the orlando shooting has already gone out of the news cycle hehehe. like was the guy really a homo hehehe or was that all just speculation and rumors.

WOMEN USED TO BE AGAINST G4Y MARRIAGE

…AND THEY CAN BE AGAINST THEM AGAIN,

is the point I was trying to make with that.

basically women are sheep that go along with the Tone set by their President hahaha. So since we have a marxist president who is all i luv gays and hate whites, normie basic women luv gays and hate whites.

you think it was like that when Ronnie Reagan was in office? OR Tricky Dicky? HELL NO!

I….dont really remember the W years. Well, during the W years I was a filthy marxist who luved gays and hated whites!!!!!!!!!!!! And I am sorry. I am SO glad to be over that horrible phase.

july 3

had to put this one in here, kinda sums up the strengths of ritual killer. i wish sammy just incorporated this into his main band.

i think its useful to think of “bestial war black metal” when trying to put this band in context. i am still not 100% sure what that phrase even means but let’s just say it means raw, hateful, fast, somewhat “old school”, relentless etc. ugly, hateful, maybe like teitanblood or this band revenge i’ve heard a lot of good things about.

http://rateyourmusic.com/customchart?page=1&chart_type=top&type=album&year=alltime&genre_include=1&genres=War+Metal&include_child_genres=t&include=both&limit=none&countries=

War Metal

now ritual killer is not categorized by RYM as war metal but I think a good case could be made!

axis of advance? james read? conqueror? blasphemy? sacramentary abolishment?

seems like for people who want to combine death and black metal but not in a “pussy” way hahahaha.

it is exactly the type of thing i wanted to make when i was 16 hehehe. rebel against the world sort of stuff. very hatefully.

just looking at the list of band names, album titles, album art gives you a pretty good idea.

i listened to the first ritual killer and it was so muddy sounding it was hard to enjoy. the second album, which ive been listenind to a lot of, has a much better enjoyable sound.

also it has tons of catchy riffs, all the songs are made of catchy riffs rather than a fuzzy, muddy, samey wall of sound, which i dont want. i want catchy heavy riffs. not people who got falling down sloppy drunk and decided to write the most extreme music ever about blasphemousgoatsodomybloodwhiskeyvomit. i like more fascist stuff about war and jackboots marching and mass graves and survival of the fittest with violent, fast, but catchy riffs, that aren’t so muddy that they stop being really heavy or catchy.

need something a LITTLE more serious that cares about songs and riffs. obviously i trust sammy d to do this! and it basically makes goatwh0re look safe and polished and vanilla and has more atmosphere than latter day GW imho, who while enjoyable…..i like something a little more extreme and underground.

but i like that the second RK album is much clearer and less muddy than the first album. clearer but still raw and face ripping. it captures my hatred and rage very nicely hahaha so i have been listening to it regularly and enjoying it more and more.

yes they are degenerates hehehe.

i imagine the Mosh Pit for Ritual Killer would be ridiculous as fook, ideally.

might just be the record of the…..season for me hehehehe.  summer 2016.

more extreme and underground and poseur-slaying than goatwh0re, which look like nickelback by comparison hahahaha.

it absolutely is related to blast beats. goatwhore has cut down on blast beats and RK has plenty of them. in every song. also a little rawer in production, yet still very heavy. wish i could say the same about the first album, which on the first listen, is just too muddy. much harder to enjoy the riffs. i never liked muddy.

this looks possibly promising

seems like goatwh0re is lumped in with “blackened death metal for poseurs” like behemoth or belphegor. or Babbys First blackened Death metal, then if youre Tr00, you graduate to more kvlt stuff like this WAR metal hehehe.

heh i should be a metal producer obviously. then i would be like hay guise you know your riffs are boring and stupid, why dont you try a little harder and bring me something GOOD.  dont you have any PRIDE in your WORK? you do WORK thats this shitty at your JOB? then your customers and your managers should be BITCHING at your constantly because this is SHIT and you shoudlnt be getting PAID for this! have some PRIDE in your WORK! You’re a white man aren’t you? Youre not an ingra are you? How can you think this shit is GOOD? You want a PRIZE for taking a disgusting tacobell shit? you present that to someone youre trying to IMPRESS and say gimme praise and plaudits for this SHITE?!?!?!?!

 

this is not a WAR METAL album but it comes close to what I am looking for, and I think even WAR METAL purists would agree that this album should get an honorable mention. Angelcorpse is about as KVLT as it gets and everyone agrees they were ahead of their time in combining death and black metal with ferocious speed and violence and aggression and hatefulness hehehehe. I particularly remember this album because I was very into metal in 1999 and they played some of this on the local Underground Metal Radio Show that ran once a week, broadcast out of a local high school. that was kind of a big Cultural Thing, considering we didnt Stream Shit on the Internet back then. You had to tie up your momz phone line for an hour to download a 30 second darkthrone clip hahahaha. this radio show was where i first heard this album, also the death album “sound of perserverance” which came out around that time, uhhh i heard hypocrisy “the final chapter”, some in flames possible “whoracle”, deicide “serpents of the light”. and well 17 years later its this angelcorpse which still sounds the most exxxxtreme hehehe.

at the time i was like WOW that’s just too much for me, i couldn’t take a whole album of that hehehehe. but I never forgot about it.

of courshe pete helmkamp has a VERY good reputation with his 14 bands, I am sure I would find other good stuff if I stuck with him.

so what skills ARE employers looking for, that they cant fill jobs, but there are thousands of long term employed out there? ok i get that you have to put forth the THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS and THOUSANDS OF HOURS to TRAIN YOURSELF by paying for long collegelike training programs, because companies arent gonna do that FOR you……but how and where do you take like robotics training classes?

so and so took a robotics training course and immediately found a job making 18 bucks an hour.

i bet he has had secs in the last 12 years too hahahaha.

did you have to pay 14k dollars for 1000 hours of training so you could be qualified to enter a 14 dah hvac tech job, in 1980?

gotta smoke MJ and listen to WAR metal

so this is revenge playing live. sometimes they have the aforementioned helmkamp playing with them. but not on this show. the drummer j read has a reputation as a beast. he also plays with axis of advance and conquest and prob some other bandz. ok the guitar player was also in axis of advance. so revenge is kinda a contiuation of that band.

anyway i guess that would be a fun show.

i hate looking at job postings and thinking “I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT.” asking for 2 to 3 to 5 years of experience in something i have NO idea what it is.  that i have never heard of in my life. just to get a 14 dollar an hour job. and the ingras at macdonalds want 15 an hour!

or 80% of jobs dont even list a wage or salary. i think this is stupid because they could easily dissuade people like me from applying for a job by saying it pays liek 45k. then i wont even APPLY.

so THEN you have to look at Glassdoor and look up that job in your area and then you get a HUGE range and of course you should look at the minimum.

and be aware if this is a “contingent” or “flex” or “casual” or “noncareer” or “support” or “as needed” or “PRN” or “floating” position. because then you might get paid 15 an hour, but you wont get any bennies, and you sure as hell wont get a regular schedule.

went for 4.6 mile walk, listened to ritual killer, axis of advance, and angelcorpse.

the axis of advance (obey) was pretty ridiculous. yeah that james read is a beast and I liked the natural, untriggered sound of the drums. but I couldnt tell if he was playing slightly sloppy, or really, really good hehehehe. no doubt he is ambitious. but is he punching above his weight? a rockstar only in his own mind? or is he actually good? i think he is actually good, but I am so used to hearing fast drummers be all overproduced, and his wheelhouse is perhaps underproduced. which is my wheelhouse too. but the guitars are very low tuned and muddy. and i have a hard time with muddy. anyway it was fun just to listen to him spazz out. you gotta have a real hardon for drumz like I do, cuz it is hard to discern the riffs.

as i was walking around i saw alot of people partying around the neighborhood because it is 4th of july weekend. so i felt lonely and wished i had some frands to do something fun with on 4th of july hehehe maybe even a special woman to spend time with, certainly many other people are spending the holiday with their frands and special wimmin.

but at the moment i am distant from all muh frands. the only person i feel like being close with is HER…..and i havent talked to her in a YEAR! even muh frands i am not really close with.

http://hyken.com/customer-experience-2/customer-service-dont-know/

the customer service GURU shep hyken, what do you mean you never heard of him, then you dont deserve to make 20k a year! i dont care if hes a joo if he can help me SURVIVE and WITHSTAND at muh horrible cust service job! you think that woman has ever read anything liek this?!/!/1/1 hell no she just sucks dicks and says someone else do this idk lol just go with the flow slurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp daddys cvmmies!!!!1

http://workplace.stackexchange.com/questions/56636/how-do-you-respond-to-a-customer-when-you-cant-answer-their-question

listened to the angelcorpse album above, forgot how the guitar is “Phasery” and seems to go whooooosh in and out, which kind of reminds me of morbid angel “covenant” which is also a good album, but that guitar sound is weird. it sounds better when there is fast tremolo picking or noisy squealing solos. in other places it sounds very clean and not very heavy. kinda weird.

but the drums are insane out of this world! great drum performance here by tony laureano, great drum sound too. one for the ages. classic. the guy is a BEAST.

heh. i guess besides playing with 20 million death and black metal bands, he is also drum tech for megadeth and has recently been playing live with megadeth, but dave mustaine just hasnt found out who this guy really is, and also that he possibly played with satanic groups, which dave does not like now that hes a born against cuckstian hahahaha. but i think would be funny if laureano plays with megadeth the same way he plays on this angelcorpse album hehehehe. ie face melting blast beats.

real fookin interesting amirite? who cares hahahaha.

so. 30 to 40 years ago the normal woman would have just SCOFFED at Gay Marriage in a way that would now be considered Totally Literally Homophobic. They would go EW GROSS UM NO. NO JUST NO. UM YEAH NO.

But now they view you as a Bigot if you are not a Gay Cheerleader!

It’s tempting to see this as a sign that women are Morally Weak.

well…..when realyl what it is, is they Go Along With The Mainstream. They are the world’s worst conformists.

In other words, if we had a Trumpenfuhrer or more Right Wing administration in office, I GUARANTEE you normie women wouldnt be CHEERLEADING gays so much. and that can happen in just a few short years.

in other words, though the woman-hating part of you might say, LOOK AT THESE ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING DEGENERATE WOMEN, WOMEN ARE INHERENTLY DEGENERATE, INFERIOR SCUM, DISGUSTING!!!!

I say SLOW DOWN, CALM YER TITS. yes women are herd lemming sheep and this can lead them into the mouth of degeneracy, but as long as they dont open their wombs to 10 different men, then i bet the SAME women who do stupidass Facebook Rainbow Flagtivism, would, under Better Leadership, sing the praises of One Man One Woman and the Tradfam.

anyway tony laureano might play in more of a controlled, accurate manner than j read, but j read is definitely more violent and aggressive. i bet laureano is one of those guy who looks like he’s barely moving as he plays br00tal 300 bpm blasts hehehe. NOT THAT THERES ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT. but j read really embodies the idea of ATTACKING the drums, his word not just mine. And referring to himself as the “HATEHAMMER”. I have to wonder how serious they are about this “Superion” thing. It is a very darwinist, weed out the week, might is right, ragnar redbeard sort of view combined with very hateful humanity-hating misanthropy which seems kinda nihilistic. I imagine it HAS to be somewhat of an act, and I do like the act, but I wonder if these guys aren’t alcoholic degenerates in real life, heheheehhe.

whereas pete helmkamp has his “heretic supremacy” and “way of the conqueror” which is similar, but he actually seems like a normal guy who has a sense of humor and a wife and I would BET is less degenerate personally. than 45 year old men that talk about hateful violence and power and dominating and exterminating the weak and seem very humorless hehehehehe.

they see no point to kindness or luv or goodness and praise evil because it is destructive and destroys the weak bla bla bla. it is about as hardcore of an image as like early mayhem or some shit. i mean i hope for the sake of their SOULS they are not like this in real life.  because i do not like seeing talented white men not having children, or wasting their lives on nihilism and drugs.

yes i know there is a BLACK guy in the black metal band blasphemy, which is kinda the godfather of this whole “ross bay cult” scene which revenge and conquerer and j read is a part of. i guess they hang out in graveyards and do blood ritual and they are black metal “skinheads”. very interesting scene I only recently became aware of.

near victoria and maybe vancouver. sheeit I just thought the town was full of FOB Asians hahaha.

this is the album that started it all. black metal skinheads. they also like POWERLIFTING hehehe. one guy went to the psych ward. another went to jail for punching out a cop and now they cant come to the US hahaha. apparently somebody K’d themself at one of their shows. their shows are legendary and turn into full blown riots.

you probably have to be drunk or st0ned to enjoy it hahahaha i have  not even listened to it.

also i am confused that there is a Black guy in the band (“Caller of the Storms”). Well he seems truly into it so good for him.

“THERE ARE TWO SIDES TO EVERY STORY.”

well whats HER side of the story?

probably that I got out of control, too weird, too much to handle, and she just couldnt handle me being so damn weird and overbearing and was better off without me. sometimes it reaches a point where you decide taht your life would be better without a certain person in it.

well i say that works for the best when both parties agree on that. i desperately wanted her to stay in my life because she made my life WAY better. and I made HER life WAY worse. heartbreak waiting to happen.

it just sucks when you make someones life worse, and THEY make your life better, and they kick you out of their life because you make their life worse. with absolutely NO regard to the pain that causes you. like you can SAY something like “now, dont take this the wrong way, im not kicking you out of my life because you make my life worse, its not your FAULT, its just that I cant do this rel, I dont have what youre looking for, im sorry.” nope you dont even get that.

uhh maybe click on the topmost link int he indeed list so when you reload the page when you get up the next day, you can see where the list ended the last time you looked at it, the visited link will show up as purple.

you can also use advanced search to filter out agencies.

i have not filtered them out, but i kind of want to.

but there will definitely be come a time where I dont want to filter them out. when I am moar desperate haha.

is there any “WAR METAL” made by Purely Nondegenerate Fascists? This WAR METAL is obviously linked with Fascism, but Tr00 fascists are not tattooed, drunkard degenerates who hate everything. They love their race and maybe their nation. they have a RaHoWa to bring abotu these glorious ideals. they are not glorifying destruction and death itself. They glorify the TRIUMPH of The Good Guys and the destruction of The Bad Guys.

so yeah while i like the tough guy shit of j read and revenge, i want something a bit more……i dunno. “serious”? Its hard to say they arent SERIOUS. well how about Less Degenerate? people who live up to rigorous Character standards.

ok skinheads used to represent The White Working Class, then got coopted by neo nazi gangs and fat skinhead rednecks. degenerates on meth and booze.

so……how about we get principled, non-degen, non-tattooed, drug-free, working-class, family men skinheads?

well dressed, well spoken, no tattoos, but still have short hair and working class jobs.

in other words, dont look like the ETERNAL ADOLESCENTS which is what METAL is. talk about ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT hahahaha.  and i am NOT talking about the j00ish tv show!

so….fascist war metal played by fine upstanding fashy goys who are well-groomed skinheads? i guess.

fascist war metal played by people that look like a fascist martial industrial neofolk band hahahaha.

just look how they use the WORD “fascist”: like “bigot” or “racist” or “pedophile”, its used as a SYNONYM for bad evil horrible person. which of course a paedophile IS…but NOT a bigot or a racist!

got to reclaim words like fascist, bigot, racist!

someone calls you racist, you say THANK YOU!

or you say SO WHAT? is that supposed to be a BAD thing? Shit YEAH Imma Raciss!

though the guys in ritual killer are a bunch of tattooed degenerates, i was happy to see them in some pictures holding Huge Guns, like very intimidating AR15 type guns. This generally sends the message that you are one of the Good Guys hahahaha.

white men who buy AR15’s are probably the type of people you want to be hanging out with. well just watch out cuz your tradwife might LEAVE YOU for them hahahaha.

basically metal that could be played during “TRIUMPH OF THE WILL.”

You seriously need to watch TRIUMPH OF THE WILL on a weekly basis. I need to watch it a lot more. I havent seen it in YEARS. I recall it being very uplifting and powerful. I should watch more of leni riefenstahl’s stuff. is it any good? she is a woman!!!!!!

yeah i had a fantasy about smonking MJ and cuddling up with That Woman and watching triumph of the will……or ANY movie or TV really. the main idea was smokin MJ and Cuddling while watching something. all the better if it were something GOOD like TRIUMPH OF THE WILL, THE BEST MOVIE EVAR.

HAIL VICTORY!!!!!!!!!

this is the sentiment that is missing in some of the hail destruction and death and get drunk metal hehe. we are, or at least the nondegenerate of us, are STRIVING towards a GOAL. towards a huhwhyte ethnostate with healthy huhwhyte families. where our women are not degenerate wh0res and our men are not sissy neet phaggot losers.

i listened to some of that blasphemy, it was ok, it actually was not as bad as I thought it would be hehehe. the production was ridiculous and I could not discern any of it. Really you just need to play it LOUD, which simply cant be done on headphones. again, i’m sure live is the best way to experience it.

which reminds me. like 7 or 8 years ago I saw the kvlt death thrash satanic metal band NUNSLAUGHTER which is i guess kinda related to the idea of drunken degenerates hailing satan and goats and vests covered in patches and they swill beer and headbang and act like big drunken children hahaha.

anyway I never really cared for nunslaughter on record, but live they were excellent and put on an outstanding show, even though I didnt really know any of their songs except the one where the singer says “I AM DEATHHHHHH” or something hahahaha.

anyway im sure they like blasphemy.

i didnt notice any superfast blast beats in the blasphemy album. but it was still moderately enjoyable. total drunk metalheads in vests with patches and goats type stuff.

i sort of enjoyed seeing that at shows, but i was never really a part of that either. i wasnt that social hehehe. plus drinking is a big part of that.

plus people one upping each other with kvlt vinyl and patches of bands where im like yeah, i only like a couple bands in this style. and i am such a big poseur I like melody hehehe. shit i like at the gates and dark tranquillity hahaha. so im not that KVLT in other words.

i fit in better with normies than with that.

i fit in with HER very well, better than i had fit in with anybody in ages. again its really hard for me to CONNECT and FIT IT with people. but with her I did. and that was VERY valuable to be. I lost something of great value to me and it was VERY painful to me. I just wish it was painful for her too. That I meant something and was WORTH something to her too, and that she SHOWED that.

listened to more of the axis of advance “obey” album. It is weird. i have this fixation on this j read all of the sudden. which is fine. but its a lot to take it. definitely a very unique style. makes you look at the drums differently. he does some things which i have never heard before. but i can’t tell how “sloppy” he is. i hate sloppy. generally. if he’s sloppy, he’s not super sloppy, if anything, its a matter of biting off more than he can chew, aiming very high. i mean he is already moving around like animal or keith moon or something. like if keith moon played tons of blast beats hehehehe. its interesting but its tiring to listen to music that is so CHAOTIC.

also the sound is so raw on the axis of advance, its hard to tell the riffs. and the guitars are VERY low tuned. im not even sure if they’re MUDDY per se.

also there are not that many NORMAL parts where he’s NOT playing a blast beat.

so yeah I def want to check out more of his work. obv i like extreme drummers and he is synonymous with that. i wonder if he is bipolar hahahahaa. PROBABLY.  what kind of wimmin does he go out with hahaha. is he a degenerate in real life. PROBABLY.

he’s an INTERESTING GUY, and a very interesting Metal Drummer. But I gotta be careful not to get TOO much of a mancrush on him!!!

better to have a mancrush on mikko aspa, at least he has a nationalist band and likes evola hahahaha. maybe he stopped making pornographic movies hahaha. i mean im not sure how j00ish the pornography wast

 

 

 

WOMEN: SERIAL HEART KILLERS

june 29

sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit

how many job apps a day do i need to do to Feel OK about uh self? 5? 8? 10? 14? 20? obviously, the higher the better. because my new goal is to get to 500 job apps and maybe by then i will have a yob hahahaha. at 200 now.

well, how abotu 420 hahaha.

so not to DOX too much but at our weekly social game night we have a guy who has been “glomming” onto our group for a Long Time, like almost 2 years, and he has a reputation for being Drunk, Obnoxious, and Overbearing. It has gradually been getting Worse instead of better and our Group Leadership is reaching a point where they want to Dump this guy, but of course that would involve a difficult conversation.

i could not help but see the parallels between this and my situation, especially when Our Leader said half-jokingly that he wished he could just “GHOST” the guy.

HOWEVER there are also such important differences that this is APPLES AND ORANGES from my situation with the woman.

in other words, it would behoove me not to dwell on the tiny similairities here, but instead the big differneces.

because basically i dont want to be like this guy, also, this does not involve a close connection between two people, but a casual connection to a social group for a specific gaming night.

also he has a pattern of this type of behavior, and has been pushed away from other groups for the exact same reason.

but yeah i hate to think i was like HIM to HER.

but i WASNT, because we had a real friendship.

even APART from the Special Feelings which I had, BEFORE all that shit, it was STILL a Good Close Friendship. something real and long term and valuable and worth something. even BEFORE I got feelings. and you cant just throw something of Value away like that.

but yeah it was a good example of a Negative Cognitive Distortion (Despair Causing) when I thought O GOD IM JUST LIKE HIM to HER. I was so overbearing that I got what I deserved, i couldnt take a hint, couldnt see the writing on the wall.

sort of….but the relationship was TOTALLYYYYYYYYYYYY different from this social group. I am not particularly intimate or super-close with any of the men, and I felt I was closer and more intimate with Her than with Them.

not that they are bad guys! the relationship is just very well-defined and compartmentalized.

even this drunk guy is not a bad guy per se….he just gets very overbearing when drinking. he is normally overbearing but its somewhat tolerable when sober, but he is unfort a bit of a habitual drinker, often pre-drinking before showng up to the pub, where he drinks some more and get incoherent, slurring the words drunk.

but he is not a physical or confrontational guy, rather he is desperate to Belong and Fit In and be Connected and Be Accepted and Have Friends. which are very legitimate desires which we ALL have. so i cant blame him for that.

but his personality and his drinking just push everyone away!

so i thought oh god what if my personality just pushes peopel away!

also i USED to be an obnoxious drunk like that who annoyed people with my drunkenness. but i totally changed that and stopped drinking altogether.

anyway  i hate to think she viewed ME like our group views HIM. just an annoying nuisance who needs to be kicked out because its just gotten to be Too Much and it makes the event less fun.

but again, APPLES AND ORANGES, because its a totally different type of relationship!!!!!!

now he is very bitter towards his ex wife, and i am SURE his behavior had something to do with that.

but im sure she gave him time. i mean they had to be MARRIED for like 10 years, they had a kid, etc.

but he managed to apparently make good money and retire at a very below average age and now has plenty of money to drink yikes.

its SAD really because hes not a bad guy, and there is some good raw material there. its TRAGIC how he pushes people away. its like a sad little boy who just wanted friends but he was just too much to handle so no one wanted to be friends with him.

and i hate to be like THAT!

http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/the-death-cult-skipping-towards-the-graveyard/37665

heheheh good anti gay article at daily stormer

mein negers hahahaha

i just gave andy anglin ANOTHER 50 cents the other day when he was having 503 server overload hehehe

but yeah I WAS OVERBEARING AND somehwat obnoxious i admit it…..but dont ghost me bro hahaha. i wasnt just glomming on to you. you used to show an interest in ME and said i was a good friend and i thought you were a good friend and things were good for almost 2 years and we got along really well. didnt THAT mean anything to you? didnt THAT build any goodwill? dont you think that earns me more than a Ghosting? i wasnt just some overbearing hanger-on. I was a REAL TRUEFRIEND.

i was a true friend, not some weird guy you just temporarily tolerated.

so i think i had EARNED better response to my weirdness, when I got weird.

protein powder + whole milk + coffee oh yeah hahaha.

some companies do not post on indeed at all but you can find them all over MONSTER. learn how to set up company alerts to email you immediately wiht new postings, from monster, careerbuilder as well as indeed.

references OTHER than previous employers and relatives??? AND relatives???? OTHER than previous employers??? wtf???

also applications that demand a full 15 year record INCLUDING explanation for ALL gaps.

i guess they are intentionally trying to limit their applicant pool….which is good for me, right?

QUALIFICATIONS:

Non Smoker

Does Not require Medical Benefits

hehehehe wow theres a new one, see something new every day. so you want medical benefits? NOT WITH US! you’re not GOOD ENOUGH to DESERVE medical benefits! you gotta PAY YOUR DUES before you can get a job with BENNIES!

was at the Supermarket and I saw a woman driving a car in the parking lot that looked SO MUCH like her. i thought it WAS her.

it wasnt the car i remember her having, but she could ostensibly have gotten a different car, there was a vanity license plate which she probably wouldnt get. there was a man in the passenger seat.

maybe she got a new boifran and is driving his car because he is in a bad mood or his license is suspended hahahaha. at least the guy was white hahaha.

hut yeah its hard to see a person driving a car 15 feet away, i tried as best i could, and all i could tell was that they looked very similar to That Woman. but this has happened occasionally. Every 25 year old white gurl with long dark hair wearing sunglasses I think is HER.

so, it probably WASNT her, but I still dont like seeing people that remind me of HER.

ok got it up (hehehe) to eight legit applications today. that was muh goal and i wasnt sure if i would get there. so good for me and have some grade A and B+ postings to do tomorrow.

or how about i need to get 100 rejection emails? only have 42 so far hehehe.

heh this is how i should be approaching WOMEN. 8-10 25 year old, no children, n < 5, white women PER DAY. hahahaha because there are a shitload of women like that.

hey you cant make a whore into a housewife. once a slut always a slut. better to have tendies than roasties hahahaha.

yeah i hate seeing women that look like her. reminds me of her. and we used to have something really GOOD. even BEFORE I fell in feelings with her, we had something very good and important and valuable.  now absolutely nothing but pain and bitterness and some regret.

some really good times like i never had with a woman……..but also some reallllllll baddddddd times that I think outweighed the good times.

but i want to have those kind of good times with a woman. but i still want HER to be that woman. i have not gotten over HER in other words and that will still take awhile.

but yeah you cant make a degenerate into a nondegenerate hahaha.

well sure you can! I changed my ways didn’t I?

i just think its apples and oranges when you are talking about an n > 4 woman. those are people you’re talking about. not like drugs or alcohol or some inanimate object. and that is the Life Creation Process we’re talking about, not just Getting Loaded.

DO YOU REALLY WANT A WHORE FOR THE MOTHER OF YOUR CHILDREN?????

heheheh

but yeah you fear that how can something THIS special happen more than ONCE in your life. i mean it feels like a once in a lifetime thing. moreover, how the hell is it gonna happen in like the medium term of the next ten years, because you want to find a woman under 30 so she can have damn CHILDREN, and having CHILDREN is VERY affected by age. Like yeah kinda stupid if I am 80 years old and finally find true luv again with some 70 year old woman. realllll fooking stupid. i think you only fall in true luv IF they are in fact YOUNG enough to be fairly fertile. in other words, being of Fertile Age can CAUSE luv. or its a PREREQUISITE. you’re not gonna fall in luv with a woman past the age of child bearing.

in other words, LOVE is Child-Focused, or at least, Reproduction-Focused. Life-Creation-Focused.

june 30.

ayo hol up. so i just got a sort of rejection email from the POST OFFICE saying that there is an exam requirement, and the maximum number of exam takers has been reached so….i am out of luck. this is for the carrier job. well sheeeit i already took the 473 exam or whatever and did pretty good on it. this is NOT the PSE mail processor job i had the more in depth interview for. but THEY said yeah we dont really have an exame for this job. in other words, i thought the exam i actually took was for this darn CARRIER position (also PSE I’m sure) which i got the email abotu today. so what if the tests are full? I ALREADY TOOK THE TEST ALMOST 2 MONTHS AGO!

anyway like i say i am very negative about the post office hahaha

but yeah technically yesterday was pretty good. got 8 legit applications in, got a 5 mile walk in the BEAUTIFUL sun, have to maximize that. made some cigarets, went to social gaming night, listened to the fatherland.

3 applications in before 12 pm hahahaha that is pretty good for me

did not have any interviews this week. ideally i would have 1 or 2 every week.

shit. got 7 done by 2:30 pm. so close to 8. gotta do it. gotta PUT IN THE REPS even when youre not getting results hehehe.

wewlad, 226 applied jobs now. got muh 8th in at a “business process services” place ie a possibly glorified kinkos hehehe.

so now would be the perfect time to go Find Leads. Originate Shit to apply to muh 8 tomorrow.

newest dark tranquillity album does not sound bad or even boring at all. he brings back the cleans a bit! and he has good cleans.

idiot on youtube says insomnium is way better than dark tranquillity. wow just wow. i cant even. no just no. um yeah no. you seem fun. you seem smart ahhahahaha.

im 12 and what is this

heh you know you are old when you dont have to make excuses to enjoy at the gates “slaughter of the soul”, or preface this with a bunch of apologies and qualifiers and ironies. because you are so old that you listened to it within 5 years of it coming out. but 10 to 15 years after it came out, it was reviled as the harbinger of super derivative and boring Melodeth that was just being copied and copied to death. yeah well i never listened to that shit. I just listened to SOTS when I was 17 and there was not really a New Wave of Melodeth. When dark tranquillity and in flames were still young and exciting bands. I actually saw DT and IF on tour together in concert. that was a good show. small club in….2002?

i didnt know much of in flames but they were headlining and they were real good.

but i did know some of DT and they were really really good and should have been headlining imho. but in flames was suprisingly good too.

and then in flames got crapped on to no end later, as did at the gates. DT got crapped on the least.

none of them really deserves to get crapped on!

good live recording of DT in 2009 (actually 2008). by this time i had tuned out of DT but i sort of came back later and caught up. good band. massive respect. I really should try to see them live again. it has been like 14 years since i saw them that one time hahaha.

well it is 4th of july weekend. all the managers and powerful peopel will be taking a long weekend so i prob didnt have a lot of chance to have an interview this week, and maybe the shit will pour in NEXT week, after the holiday.

rejection email for 35k a year admin asst job, a rare FT job at this place i would liek to get in. 28 days after the application.

heheheh so youre saying i should not expect much from those 40k jobs i applied to recently hehehe.

uh yeah i think i might be saying that? i dunno know and i cant get any clarification, so….you just have to take my not so good guess hahahaha.  IT IS WHAT IT IS.

anyway DT actually make playing live look fun and remind me of why I wanted to do it. doesn’t mean they cant be degenerates tho.

but its hard for people who want to live a nondegenerate life of having wife and keeids.

oh you mean doing drugs and alcohol and banging degen disease sluts and acting like ingras all the time gets old? hahaha.

OF COURSH!

oh good for them, they’re not even so drunk they can’t play their instruments for the people who paid 30 bucks to see them hahaha. good for them. i dont show up so drunk to work every day that i cant do my job. when i had a job hahahaha.

see i experienced the drugs and alcohol but i never experienced the banging sluts. like a revolving door of white trash sluts with their own drinking and drug problems. i banged a very middle class slut once who went on to have a great career despite her bipolar hahahaha. although I’m pretty sure her marriage failed LOL. because she’s a bipolar slut who is probably really bad at relationshits hahaha.

well she’s good at career though. I am bad at both relationships AND career!

well at least I’m not BIPOLAR!

well i might be hahaha. give it another 10 years of Treatment Resistant Depression and Shitty High Stress Jobs and Woman Hating, hahaha.

its really not hard to like women if they’re not bitchy to you.

put another way, its really easy to overlook their major shortcomings when they are making an effort to be NICE to you!

if a job is in a Call Center, they should say that up front. You shouldn’t have to have a damn INTERVIEW to find out its in a Call Center. And also you have to ask them at the interview: yes or no. is this in a call center. and give me an idea of the pay. like, i will apply for a 30k job and feel pretty entitled. I apply to a 40k job and I know that is a Huge Reach, and maybe I shouldnt even waste my time.

but I would be most HOPEFUL about a….25-28k job. or a 14-15 DAH job. and you dont see a lot of postings advertising something in that sweet spot. you will see postings of 9 DAH or 20 DAH, with nothing in between hehehe.

well what I want is 14 DAH…..and no jobs will publicly post that wage.

hey really good sound on that live album above. that is NOT easy to do with a live metal recording. the vast majority of metal live recordings are shitty hehehe. can only listen to them if you are a Huge Fan In The Mood. but this one will make you a huge fan and put you in the mood!

heh. i wish i could just go back to drinking. its something social to do. you go out with people and you DRINK. and hopefully they like you because you are out socializing and DRINKING with them. I guess I could bring MJ to these sorts of things…..but i dont like doing MJ with people unless I feel Super Close with them. I always feel very Self Conscious, liek people are Judging me.

so it says a lot that I really WANTED to smoke MJ with That Woman…..when NORMALLY I dont want to smoke MJ with ANYBODY.

thats actually a good measure for how close of a friend they are: would you want to smoke MJ with them, or would you just get nervous around them?

a “good alternative” to me drinking would be me doing BENZOS hahaha. but I would need to take a COUPLE. take at LEAST 2 valiums or xanaxs, if not 3.

some women will stubbornly stay with and NOT give up their boifrands who are depressed or otherwise Not Right hehehe.  I have to think that these men are extremely masculine otherwise, because Depression (Despair) makes a man less masculine and essentially makes him VERY unattractive to women, in other words, it will drive women away, and you can’t expect ANY woman to Be There For You during your Hard Times, because your Hard Times will make you very repulsive, and you will push them away.

Now I’m not saying your GF Waifu should help Cure Your Issues. I AM saying they should Stand By You and Support You while you DEAL with the Ups and The Downs. And now LEAVE you when you start first showing Signs of Weakness and you Need them the Most, then blame them for being Weak and Needy.

So what ELSE is it about these Depressed men who DONT drive their tradwaifus away with their depression? Where the woman says, oh noes, I want to help my beloved husbando get through this! We’ll get thru this together!

cuz bitches dump ME at the very first sign I am not fooking Super Confident Thor Alpha. And Depression/Despair attacks your Alpha Confidence DIRECTLY. It attacks That Which Makes you Attractive to Women.

Meanwhile, when WOMEN get Depression, it has NO RELEVANCE to what makes women attractive to men. So Men are more likely to stay with a woman with Issues, than a Woman will stay with a man With Issues.

shit That Woman didnt even know the Depths Of My Despair, shit as far as I’m concerned its nobodys business but my own, i refuse to tell a woman about it because I KNOW it will make them BOLT like the road runner, leaving just a cloud of dust.  cuz thats just how women ARE. they leave you in the lurch and dont support you, so you better not show ANY weakness or need of support.

so i never told her I see a shrink once every 3 weeks, or that I have been taking AD’s since like 2008. and that this despair is very much tied into my Failure At Life.

But she didn’t really care that I was a Failure at life! She didn’t SEE me that way!

and honestly i am not a TOTAL failure at life! My True Friends dont regard me as a total failure who doesnt deserve to have True Friends!

they dont BAIL on me the second I have a Personal Problem!

True Friends DONT DO THAT!

And I thought she was a true friend.

but its my fault to compromise that with muh feelings. muh fee fees .

i think she WAS a true friend, but she was an IDIOT about dealing with that.

i was an idiot too, or, more accurately, a coward.

shit, she was an idiot AND a coward! and idiot because she totally misunderstood what this meant, and she felt betrayed and mad. at least I was smart enough to know that It Wasnt Betraying.

stupid idiot. would rather suck dicks and get fooked up the ass than not throw away someone she was true friends with for 2.7 years hahahahaha.

i REALLY hope not all women are like this! and she was one of the GOOD ones!!!!

well this is just a case of a good person being a YUGE coward.

ive been a huge coward too and i am basically a good person. but no one was really HURT by my cowardice, other than myself. i never broke anyones HEART with muh cowardice.

i dont WANT to break anyones heart……even after its been done to ME! i dont want to put anyone through this! i would make an effort NOT to break a persons heart in this way.

ok have to do the 5 miler, listen to dark tranquility and the fatherland with richard spencer the phag lover hahahaha. he’s got a faggy voice, why doesn’t his wife leave him? and she’s not even a man because they have a child together!

well because he’s very handsome and apparently charismatic, to lead his organzation. but he doesnt seem THAT charismatic tho! But he IS very handsome. and I think he Lifts. just a little at least. but that phaggy voice and the lack of charisma is gonna cause his wife to leave him and their child hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha jk.

went for 5 mile walk, only listened to dark tranquillity, pretty good show, maybe the guitar sound wasnt AS good as I thought it was, well its still pretty good. very listenable. but I still dont see how “when death is most alive” is a better closer than “final resistance” or another bona fide classic.

and whenever i experience good thrilling things, i wish SHE was there to Share them with. but she is gone forever.

yep 11.5 months later and still.

it’s honestly LESS PAINFUL to HATE women!!!! than to think of her and still want her!

so thats why i hate women. it’s BETTER than the alternative!!!!! its LESS PAINFUL to ME!!!! it protects me and builds a nice protective scar over a deep gaping wound! it allows the gaping wound to slowly HEAL! but its only about 55% healed so far! in 1 year! therefore, 100% in 2 years! yeah thats heavy…..AS IT SHOULD BE!!!!! falling in LUV is a BIG DEAL!!!!

2 years is ok, 4 years is not. and I REALLY dont think it will be 4 years.

set up google alert to deliver me news on the organization that is pushing for legal weed in muh state because they dont have a mailing list and i dont want to look at their facebook hehe

muh soggy knee

damn. weed is degenerate ingra trash but i still feel it would HELP get me THROUGH this Trial. more like a prison sentence hehehe. one more year to go hehehe.  just got to keep going through the motions till then.

http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/arizona-has-collected-200-000-signatures-demanding-marijuana-legalization/37833

heh tailor made topic for me. great comments

As for those who claim using weed can alleviate anxiety and depression, so can companionship and community. In fact, I would venture to say it is our atomized society and destroyed families that are the cause of so much drug use. The long-term solution to drug abuse is the re-establishment of the traditional family structure and society. In the mean time the powers that be should use draconian laws to crack down on this behavior.

another:

The real studies on the long term effects have shown that marijuana increases the size of the pleasure centers within the brain, which means it requires ever greater amounts of stimuli to trigger them.

What this means in real terms is that outside of the activities that are enjoyed while getting high, the smoker is being actively “brainwashed” or Pavlovian trained to only enjoy consuming the mediums and doing the things that are commonly done while high. This means TV and movies that are produced by j’s that are targets those specific markets is that much more effective in indoctrinating those people.

In effect marijuana allows them to brainwash those people and condition them to be purely hedonistic consumers and likely race-traitors.

It basically means that marijuana is an effective weapon to leverage goys into degeneracy.

That is why they push for it. Every place that has legal marijuana also has ridiculous firearm restrictions as well. There is no such thing as a coincidence when talking about j’s.

another:

Alcohol will kill you before it allows you to be effectively indoctrinated.

I am not advocating it’s consumption constantly or in excess, but it’s far less dangerous to our society than marijuana. Marijuana is very deceptively dangerous, as it’s danger is subversive, not visibly present.

another:

An ex-weed smoker here.

Weed is much more dangerous than people think. It won’t get you crazy, you won’t kill your family, won’t make you do crime to get it. But it weakens your willpower and gives you a false feeling of saticefaction. Also people think that it lasts for a couple of hours and that’s it. It’s bullshit. It effects your brain even the day after you smoked it. The majority is just too blunt to notice it. But it really does.

ok thats enough haha. END QUOTES

but im using it for MEDICAL purposes, to help with muh despair and anxiety. and to help me get over broken heart. and to help me escape into a fantasy world from a disappointing real world hahahaha. to be content with substandard shit. to be content with being a LAZY LOSER the rest of muh life. yikes!

I took responsibility for what I did wrong, why couldnt YOU???!?!?!?!?

because she was having hard times in life, was overwhlemed and scared, and was cowardly and immature, and her father abandoned her, and her BF broke her heart and threw HER away recently, and her mother doesnt get along with men well, and she’s still not over the more serious BF, and she is Emotionally Retarded hehehe.

so I don’t really mean WHY, i mean, jeez I wish you could have taken responsibility for what you did wrong, like I did.

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR WHAT YOU DID WRONG.

I DID!!!!

really i dont care if MJ gets legalized recreationally, it would be just as good for me if Medical MJ were approved for Despair or Anxiety, because I have documented conditions for those. ESPECIALLY despair.

at the moment, shady old retired doctors will give you a certification just for walking in. doesnt matter if you have no records, no bona fide doctor patient relationship, no qualifying conditions!

that is how That Woman got HER medical card! just wandered into some random place and was “in and out in 5 minutes lol” with no medical records, no questions about qualifying conditions. she doesnt even know what the qualifying conditions ARE. and lemme tell ya, she doesnt have a one.

i could probably ask the guy i see at my weekly social thing if he can get any MJ for me hehehehe. my problem right now is that I dont really know anyone who can get me it hehehe. it used to be That Woman because she had a medical card and went to The Store regularly and was More Than Happy to Pick Something Up For Me. and I said ohhh thank you sweetie you are the greatest, i hope we can hang out this month and smoke some MJ together, it would be so much fun! never happened hahahaha. but she had no problem with buying stuff for me. Weird amirite? well i mean I would pay for it of course hahaha.

i mean 10 years ago, the whole town would go “dry” and we couldnt get MJ for WEEKS sometimes hahahaha.

and you certainly couldnt have any CHOICE in what KIND of MJ you got! you either had low medium or high quality. no differentiation between sativa and indica, which to me is the most important thing. sativa makes me panic, indica doesnt hahaha.

but despair peopel who take MJ can sometimes get WORSE! maybe thats what happened to me, now i am permanently fooked up!

 

NOT EVEN A FINALIST FOR MAILROOM CLERK

june 23

ive never seen a job posting that says DONT FOLLOW UP. I have seen “NO PHONE CALLS” which I guess might be code for that.

I bet “progressively increasingly responsibility” is CODE for dont hire losers like me who might not technically job-hop……but they never move UP in their Career because they are an unambitious loser, who just Shows Up To Work. doesn’t ATTACK their work with gung ho initiative. they might not be scared of work, but they are scared of progressively increasing responsibility. we dont want such a SLACKER. only marginally better than a JOB HOPPER.

oh sheeeeeit. this job tomorrow is 15 DAH. no WAY am I gonna get that. #Fight415 hahahahahahaha

NOICE. rejection email for MAILROOM CLERK job I applied to at least 2 months ago.

applied april 1, rejected june 23 NOICE

CANT EVEN GET AN INTERVIEW FOR MAILROOM CLERK. I was not a FINALIST for MAILROOM CLERK.

cant even be a finalist for mailroom clerk, cant even get dumped via text.

i dont care, i am a HUHWHYTE SUPR3MIST!!!! 14 WURDZ!!! HUHWHYTE POWER! HUHWHYTE POWER!!!!

Too bad I can’t use some of that Huhwhyte power to Get a Job and Get a Huhwhyte Huhwyfe, hahahahahahaha.

oh heres a good protip. some companies jobsites dont even allow you to set up a job email alert for new job postings in the area.

so now you have to go to indeed and see if you can find that company by typing company:(marxist univershitty) in city or zip whatever. then FOLLOW the company, then look in your job ALERTS, then find the company again, and then change the alert from weekly to daily. this way you will get notified same day of any new postings. also if it’s a big company in many states or cities, change that alert so its within 10 or 20 miles of your home for that company, so you don’t get alerts for jobs in fooking california or some godforsaken state where you dont live.

i saw a young blond girl at my social thing. she was definiitely under 25 and over 21. maybe 21 or 22. so ridiculously cute. had natural, long blond hair. no makeup. was not dressed like a whore, except her Jeans were a little tight. but she had this innocent look too which I liked. I said YASSSSSSS if I were hanging out with THAT gurl, I WOULD forget about THAT woman and fully get over her.

though what do i say to talk to a 22 year old gurl whos CLEARLY out of my league?? plus I think she was Fooking one of the guys in her group.  He didnt look SUPER alpha. I was a bit envious because good lord. i mean the gurl was hawter than supermodels or porno bitches or whatever The (((((Media))))) says that men think is hawt.

NO. Men think normal regular young gurls are hawter than any MODEL. But so many women are fat potatoes hhehehe.

Hey I’m no longer overweight! I’m simply asking for a woman who has the same BMI as I do!!!!

also if they have some Fat on their Belly or Hips or Thighs or Fat Ass, that’s PERFECT. just dont be a fooking shapeless stumpy potato.

apparently 70% of employers have a Pet Peeve when Candidates apply who are CLEARLY not qualified hehehe. well then they probably hate me!

interview tomorrow, havent even looked at shit yet, but i have applied for 7 other jobs hahaha.

196 jobs. soo close to the 200 mark. well this is not exact because some of those emails include 2 or more jobs, and some jobs do not send confirmation emails.

just imagine some dark, big-lipped, knuckle-dragging “google”. if he can work a job and make 15 DAH, SO CAN YOU, HUHWHYTE MAN!!!!!!!!

HUHWHYTE POWER!!!! HUHWHYTE POWER!!!!! 1433!!!!!

See this is TERRIBLE for the movement, and I am sorry guise. I KNOW you need better representation. Like the handsome, young, strong, successful young man spotted in texas wearing a TRS shirt and trump hat. He probably has a great job and a decent GF and will have a nice huhwhyte family. huhwhytes dont need NEET losers coming out in front……lest normies think that all huhwhyte 1433ers are neet losers. i mean this has already been the stereotype forever, and only in the past year or so has there been any significant progress made in changing that stereotype, and I am not helping in that regard WHATSOEVER!!!!!!!

so yeah don’t take me as a representative for the movement. they are much more successful at life than me. i wish I could be an asset to muh holy race and not a liability!

but i dont care! I will luv muh huhwhyte race as much as ever loved any huhwhyte woman, and certainly more than any woman ever luved ME!

I have a RELATIONSHIP with the HUHWHYTE RACE! a pretty healthy loving monogamous relationship! better than I have had with any woman!

it’s two sided! it supports me, and I support it!

It looks NARCISSISTIC when you project the amount of CONFIDENCE you NEED to have to SURVIVE at a bare minimum, meaning, 15 dollars an hour, and to get a woman to not abort your baby. if you dont have that natural confidence, you HAVE to fake it till you make it, and when you have to fake a whole lot of confidence like this (becuase it does take a LOT of confidence), it can look like narcissism to the unconfident, neet, loser, depairing eye.

be v10l3nt. (warning: not advocating v10l3nce.) by that I mean Have A Predator’s Mindset. Not afraid to beat the shit out of aggressors, or anyone who looks at you funny. Don’t Be Afraid To Use Violence When “Necessary”, and have a hair-trigger for determining that level of necessary. be like an google or a jihadist and beat the shit out of wimpy phaggots just because they LOOKED at you the wrong way. this is a sure sign of the confidence you need in life.

in previous generations the MEEK used to be able to survive. get a 15 dahj, and maybe even have kids with some crazy skank, or some ugly beta woman for a wife. but no more. the meek are getting slaughtered.

i mean its stupid to take a 30 question “IQ” test for a 12 dahj, then a 150 question (ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY) question personality test. I mean, the tests i can understand……..if you become a Finalist just by taking the test. but I will do well on the iq test, probably do pretty good on the pers test, and still not be a finalist for a 12 dahj accounting clerk job.

hehehe there is even a warning saying dont try to game the pers test to what you THINK people would want, tehre is a measure in there that is meant to detect lying, and you will be disqualified.

oh shit waddup dat boi

b76aef22ea0161d7b26c8e731237cf3bb6cd3e1d

AYO HOL UP

see the frog speaks AAVE and I am marginalizing that hahahahah AYO AYO AW SHEEEEEIT WAADDDDDUP DOE

AAVE, sukk muh dikk damn google skypes hahahaha. its a damn frizzy haired mulatto google skype with a phd in african american studies that came up with that word AAVE i bet any money.

ingras hahahaha.

but yeah just be OBNOXIOUSLY CONFIDENT. yeah I guess to be a well rounded not OVER confident normie is best, but its hard to have that equanimity and security when you are just Faking It.

i know women like that, but i didnt realize how much employers are the same way.  like stupid bitches who just want googlish, chest-pounding narcissistic gorilla big man thuggishness.

what is the huhwhyte version of Hypermasculinity?

Maybe a Slavic Strongman? maybe something like Thor?  The Golden One? Yeah basically. these guys are big and they are RIPPED.

still havent prepared for interview at ALL. havent printed shit out, havent prepped muh Stories, havent done Jack Shit, its like a Homework Assignment from College that I’m procrastinating on.

here’s why i don’t like women:

WHY DO YOU NEED TO BE WITH 10 GUYS BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED?

WHY DO YOU NEEEEED TO BE WITH 5 GUYS BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED?

I don’t NEED to be with 5 WOMEN before I get married!!!!!!

So why do you NEED to be with SO MANY GUYS? fooking degenerates.

june 24

well had my interview at the …..education place. on paper it sounds really good. they give training in like and to employers who apparently cant do it themselves hahaha. there is a huge ass facility with big expensive equipment.

i talked with the director who was a……darn S (type of huwhyte) hahahahaha. dont want to mention too much re opsec and doxxing, because you dont see many S’s around these parts. but i of course have a hardon for these hyperboreans. while searching for his email address afterwards i found a press photo of him standing with prezident barry obongo hahahahahaha when the prez actually visited this facility during a visit to our state. because it has significance to the economy and jobz. training working class people to work with. techmology etc.

hahaha so technically i talked to a guy today who had talked to barry a few years ago hahahaha and had pictures taken for the paperz to prove it. 2 degrees of separation.

i was nervous and talked too quickly, but i did OK i guess. the interviewers were nice enough. even the S guy did not try to bust my balls or freeze me out with S coolness, hahaha.

sent the thank you email.

they said they would decide quickly, like next week.

it seems like a great place and it was pretty quiet in there, no phones ringing off the hook.

put its just part time and temporary.

technically i would probably take the nursing home backoffice job over this, just because that is full time and permanent.

hehehe i guess if they offer me, then say listen if this nursing home offers me, im gonna have to take it.

AW FOOK I forgot to ask is there a chance of this job being made permanent. its all to do with grants and funding and shit.

is there a chance of the job being made full time. well….probably not hahahaha. getting a full time job at this organization is fookin impossible. they have like 1 ft opening a year for phd-level (or at least MBA) administrators and directors and shit.

yet i interviewed for an FT job there once that only required an associates degree. I did not get it and I was pretty pissed. cuz it was with the actual department i had worked in.

had a dream last night that had That Woman, dont remember much, but we were arguing very unproductively. She was bad at me and was being a brick wall. not much different than real life, except she was willing to be a brick wall to me IN PERSON.

maybe it means even if we HAD met up, it would not be a good talk, and she would still Stonewall me.

but its so much better to be stonewalled in person than stonewalled from a distance hahahahaha. shows they are still willing to spend time alone with you outside of work hahaha.

was watching the first episode of luther yesterday. i like the show even though i wish luther was white. but idris elba plays the role well. so i just pretend he’s white. but he’s always dating/fooking these WHITE women. so I’m conflicted. I wish he would just be with other white-acting black women.

also I am WELL aware that he could make ANY white woman Go Black. White Women LOVE him and think he is the secsiest man ever. And he does have a lot of masculine charisma, and is a Big Masculine Man. I can see why the ladies luv him. but have some damn racial hygiene. but women just don’t have that in them. it’s up to men to manage the purity of the race. women will just have mud babies with any big secsy black ape hahaha.

but luther is essentially a very hwyte acting black guy. i am sure there are horrible articles out there talking about how this is problematic, that luther’s blackness is essentially ignored.

anyway, basically I just pretend he is white, and try not to bitch about his wife being a mudshark. but she is a total lawyercvnt who does a trial seperation, and luther wants her back, only now she’s fooking a new man (a white guy) and she loves him and she blames luther for the marriage failing, because he was distant and married to his work. so i say give him a damn chance, don’t dump him and start fooking a new guy! luther wants to make this work! meet luther halfway!

so luther gets upset when she dumps him, and he breaks a door in her house. does this mean luther is a bad woman beater? of course not! but when you break a damn door or punch the wall, stupid women see this as abuse, or a red flag. but its NOT. you’re just RIGHTFULLY ANGRY she is leaving you in the lurch, not giving you a chance, not wiling to make an effort, and just dumping you for another guy she’s fooking.

but luther is not really protrayed as ABUSIVE though. We KNOW he wouldnt beat HER. but we also know he is a bit unhinged and bipolar and hell yeah he’s gonna break a door. But I at least trust him not to beat her. and he doesn’t. at least not in episode 1. but he is upset and pounding on her door pleeeeasssseeee talk to me for 1 minute!!!!!!! adn she doesnt want to talk.

so i see her as a total bitch and i sympathize with luther totally. apart from him being black and her being an obnoxious humanitarian lawyercvnt. she WOULD be.

I know later he gets involved with a troubled young white gurl.

why can’t he just find a nice black gurl?

so apart from that, the show is pretty good.

also i find it weird that a woman can resist this masculine Ebony Hunk. who’s a bit of a badboi and a fixer, but he makes a great living as a ….DCS? DCI? im sure he makes good money in his detective job. you dont just start out in a job like this. he’s been Promoted many times. he is essentially A Manager. a position of Authority.

also, blaq people arent as smart as luther hahaha.

wow brexit vote leave, that is pretty interesting. that is prob a good thing. certainly us racist rightist nationalists agree the eu is bad and uk should leave it. be very interesting to see how this plays out. i mean its reason to be cautiously optimistic.

i wonder how my 401k is doing hahahaha. uh it has lost like 90 dollars from when i first started it hahahaha. what a fookin waste.

i dunno i like anything that da joos and the leftist commies dont like. and they say its onyl racist fascist nationalist uneducated FOOKING HWYTE MEN who want to leave. well looks liek the good guys won then hahahaha.

so….ok. if they offer me this job with the S , say yes i’d love to BUT be aware if I get the offer from the “assisted living facility” I will HAVE to take that, which means I will leave you in the lurch after 1 or 2 weeks.

heh. assuming I get TWO offers AT ONCE.

ok so thats NINE interviews. I guess I should expect at least 14 interviews before an offer right? 14? lucky 14? as in 1433? certainly 1433 interviews is way too much. I don’t think I’ve even done 1433 interviews in my whole life, hahahahahaha. i don’t think the biggest job hopper has done 1433 interviews in their whole life!

i wonder if i can get BANNED from (((wordpress))) just for using the number 1433. VERY PROBABLY.

i have become wat ramzpaul calls “the 1433 crowd” and I LUV it hahahaha.

ridiculous. i was being interviewed by a S who was photographed showing the same facility to barry hussein obongo. good god how ridiculous. he seemed like a good alpha male though. i like S’s (well, in theory) and he seemed like a decent guy. but I am INTIMIDATED by power and authority, because its exactly what I don’t have. Women are not so intimidated by it, but they think its SEXY. which is why they dont think Im sexy at all hahaha. I know this guy has been married for 2x years. HOPEFULLY he has at least 3 children. hopefully he is married to a hwyte , if not S woman. i would be surprised if he were married to a nonwhite. power white men in this area rarely get married to nonwhite women.

i TOLD you I was obsessed with race and being white.

took 4.44 mile powerwalk. beautiful evening. 78-80 degrees.

i would totally take her back. i simply dont have feelings for anybody else. i would bang other gurls but i just cant imagine having feelings for them. and i wouldnt want to marry or Create New Life with some broad i didnt have FEELINGS for.

like i had with her!

if she came back to me i could TOTALLY rekindle. pick up where we left off. re establish the good shit we once had. and I would put SAFEGUARDS in place to make sure this shit didnt happen again. for example, i would ask her once a month “thinking of leaving me? dont. talk to me about it first” hahahaha

and some intense poundings and spankings would be more than enough to DOMINATE her and make her be LOYAL to me. i would pound and spank the shit out of her.

ok i will tell them i have 25%? 33? 40% chance of getting this nursing home job (dont call it a nursing home, call it long term care) which is full time and permanent. whats the perfect percentage? I think about 25%.

i mean i NEVER know realistically what the percentage is anyway. 1 out of 14 hahaha. 7% chance of getting any job.

but yeah i would take her back.

in my state there are more openings, far more, for mechanical engineers than electrical engineers.

well, i’m sure either one would do well in any state.

i mean i dont give a shit about anythign but finding a good white wife. and i found one and she left me bwawawawawawawawaw. and i need to replace her with a better or at least good ENOUGH white woman to make me FORGET about her.

i mean you never forget, but you CAN move on. i haven’t forgotten about woman2012…..but really i might as WELL have for the little i think about her, and I truly don’t want her any more! i mean yeah if she came back into my life i could probably stir up some interest haha. but it just doesnt BOTHER me at ALL anymore.

the shit with woman2015, That Woman, still bothers me a LOT, every DAY.

woman2012, doesnt bother me at ALL. dont even think of her once a WEEK.

well at least i got at least 2 solid Job Leads today when I skipped applying for Jobs to go to muh interview.

the job sounds confusing as fook. i told them i have “pretty thick skin” and can handle the bantz. and can work well under pressure and not take stuff personally. hehehehe. well its TRUE that I got pretty GOOD at working under pressure at the call center. I just forget about that because I lost all muh confidence in the last 3 or so months i was workign there. because of the situation with her. i totally lost confidence in my job.

if she werent THERE at the JOB, and I were just having Problems With My Wife, i dont think it would have affected my confidence at work so much.

but to see her there ignoring me and hating me and being friendly with other guys, probably fooking them the whore, hahahah, that was too much. i hate seeing muh women rejecting me and then seeing the other guys who are my competition. who are then succeeding where I failed. i cant handle seeing any of that shit. even if theyre not rubbing it in my face per se. i just dont want to see ANY of them. well, mainly the woman. if she quit the job at that time, i would probably still be there. well, id be collecting unemployment now and i prob would be more confident about taking a new job at a new place, where i might be a level 2 or supervisor. god i hope she’s not a supervisor at HER new place. fooooook me. fook her. i wonder who shes fooking. i wonder how many guys shes fooked in the past 11 months. 1? 2? 3? 4?

THERES NO NEED TO FOOK MORE THAN 4 GUYS BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED.

hehehehe. no need to fook more than THREE guys.

let alone three guys in ONE YEAR!!!!!! horry sheet! DEGENERATE.

public shaming would keep women from doing this. this is why slut shaming is GOOD. we need MORE of it. it keeps women from being sluts. like if you publicly flogged, or wore a scarlet letter. it wouldnt cost the taxpayer 50 dollars a day to punish you. just a public flogging and shave your head bald. i guess a scarlet letter, how would you enforce that? that would cost too much money to enforce. but a flogging and head shave? less than one hour of 12 dollar an hour work. and you could make the woman pay for it.

we are going to flog and shave sluts heads, and we are gonna make sluts pay for it!!!!

how about locking a chastity belt on them? it would be like having an ankle bracelet. i had one hahahah. you cant just take it off. if you do, the court is automatically notified. and you pay a shitload of money for it.

pay a 10000 dollar fine for being a slut. then i guarantee you would stop being a slut. like i stopped drinking. although its more shameful to be a slut than a drunkard hahahaha. cuz i wasnt degrading my babymaker hahahaha. although i guess i could have killed somebody. still not as bad as abusing you babymaking ORGAN and, more profoundly, your babymaking ROLE. with great power comes great responsbility, and sluts abuse that power and totally shirk that responsibility, shamefully!

THEY DESERVE TO BE SHAMED!

I bet those 2 sluts I was with when I was young have been with BLACK guys! well, the first slut at least! but good chance on the second one too.

i just dont have PROOF of it, the way i do with That Woman. pictures of her getting jizz blasted on her pretty white face from idris elba hahahaha. daddies cvmmies hahahaha. that is a terrible meme.  copypasta from some submissive sluts who like to find a dominant “daddy” and then they BEG him to jizz on their faces and they call it daddys cvmmies.

well i kind of like the idea of being one of those dominant daddies hahahaha and some little slut BEGGING to get DEFILED by me. but i wouldnt marry the gurl. i would gladly enjoy a phase of degeneracy with her though!