SHE COULD GET AWAY WITH NOT DEALING WITH IT

yep

sept 11

heh. not to insult the old friends of mine who are unfortuantely, sadly leftist, but……. i just remembered something that happened on our recent reunion that made me shake my head and told me that there was no hope in trying to Turn these people hehehehe.

basically it was simple, just talking about LB Johnson and how he was such a old school white racist who wanted segregation for blacks. it didnt matter that he was huge democrat and the great society and that he might have done more than any one president to turn our once great nation into a marxist progressive antiwhite disgrace. immigration, welfare, etc. they touched on this, but were like, YEAH BUT he was also a huge old school white racist from texas. he wasn’t a real modern democrat….even though he probably did more SJW shit than any modern democrat. all they saw was an evil white racist.

basically they should be worshipping this guy like he was the next MLK! but no, all they see is a white racist!

because he simply LOOKED LIKE a white normie from texas! just a masculine white man with a texas twang. never mind that his policies opened the door to giving BILLIONS to nonwhites!

really I should have said, YEAH BUT dont you think you’re underestimating the effect of the great society? i mean really, isnt LBJ the greatest person for Civil Rights since MLK? do you really think thats fair just to write him off as an evil white racist? he really wasnt old school at all!

i was just caught off guard by the ridiculousness of it, and also my communication skills were compromised by MJ!

and yet these are decent, moral white people parroting this nonsense!

they cant get past LBJ looking like a FOOKING WHITE MALE to realize the pretty obvious truth that he was a YUGE SJW and pretty much sentenced the white race to death hahahahaha. the fact that he has a twangy accent and wasnt a Marxist Community Organizer is enough for them!

and ultimately he went to do one of the single biggest Marxist Actions our country has ever seen!

doesnt matter, cuz he LOOKS like a traditional white family man. so somehow he was a “conservative democrat”. wtf???????

you could not have a more marxist prez if KARL MARX had been prez!!!!!!!!

why the hell would they signal against LBJ of all people?

because in their mind, he represents Traditional Old School White Racists.

EVEN THOUGH HE DIDNT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

in hindsight I should have probed on this absolutely ridiculous discussion, but again, MJ makes me unable to have even simple small talk.

oh and LBJ probably owned a GUN too. he was the type of guy to go HUNTING. and he probably didnt want his daughter to be a race mixing slut. what a racist sexist woman hating black hating bigot racist.

they cant look past these tiny details to see the YUGE OBVIOUS LASTING LEGACY of LBJ!!!!!!

Maybe i am OVERESTIMATING LBJ and the great society pogams in particular.

i mean im sure there were tons of marxist j’s advising him.

hmmmm i have found the new evalion hahahahahah

i bet this channel will be shut down by the time this post posts.

well after 1 minute of inspection she seems less slutty than evalion, but she does have crazy eyes!

not gonna get my hopes up too much here.

but I would wager that shes taken less cox than evalion and might be a better wife and mother.

gonna try to manage expectations tho.

i guess she already did an interview with sinead. i hope sinead does not latch onto her and turn her into even more of a psychopath.

i would feel a lot more comfortable if she (crusader gurl) were doing this with her father or something. what does her father think of all this?

it feeeeels really weird and wrong for very young gurls to get on the frontlines of a very real ideological war. just like with Combat, women SHOULDN’T be doing this. you can support your father or husband or brother who is doing it. make white babies with your white husband. maybe make videos about how awesome being a mother is. and cool it with the hitlers and the swastikas. they make you look like a shill hhahahahahaha.

men can do that, women cant. and even most men dont fathom what theyre getting into when they do that. i say, err on the side of caution and dont go full 1488 until you know exactly what youre getting into. like me hahahaha. and even i dont post hitlers and swastikas. it just looks fishy when a 17 year old gurl on the internet does.

girl on the internet syndrome. beware.

maybe do a show with your strong white boifran. or father.

i should really write to her and try to become her handler. i mean women can REACH alot more people than men. she can get 1000 subscribers in a day where it would take a guy a YEAR. people pay a lot more attention to young purty wimmin. so, tread carefully. she is gonna be under a TON of scrutiny, like evalion, and it didnt take long for evalion to be shut down and probably discredited.

and yes their secs lives ARE relevant, because you want a person with GOOD CHARACTER.

and really….yeah its nice to see women getting into this stuff, but I have NEVER heard something explained MORE profoundly or powerfully by a woman than by a man. NEVER. in other words, a man can ALWAYS say this stuff more persuasively. More Better, hahahahaha.

but the women get more initial views.

and im sure part of it is me being Lonely for a Woman that is Against Race Mixing.

here’s a fun game for you: test women you meet by getting them talking about idris elba or denzel washington. I reckon the MAJORITY of them will take the bait and say DAYUM WHAT A SEXY MAN. MMM HMMMM. I WOULD SUCK HIM OFF RIGHT NOW. I WOULD FOOK HIM ALL NIGHT AND LET HIM BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF ME.

this is a blatant signal that the woman is open to race mixing.

the ideal woman would get uncomfortable talking about secs, would not say anything publicly, then in private, would tell you shes just not into black guys.

just look for any remark where a white woman talks about a black guy being Handsome or Secsy.

if you’re against race-mixing, you JUST WOULDNT DO THAT.

I never talk about how nonwhite women are good looking! because I honestly dont care! I DONT WANT TO RACE MIX!!!!

well there are a couple jooish and maybe indian women i would bang. but they would probably stink like curry!

and also i have fully thought through the implications of having children with them, and that is something i would never want to do!

but yeah, its just not the DOMAIN of cute innocent doe eyed 16 year old gurls to be talking about this stuff!!!!!

KIND OF like how its not the domain of innocent little gurls to be huge cvm guzzling sluts!

well….i say kind of because those are two VERY different things.  i’m just trying to say that young gurls are JUST TOO INNOCENT for this kind of stuff. it’s TOO MUCH for them. it’s not RIGHT for them to be in it.

kind of like a woman forgoing being a wife and mother so she can be a damn CEO.

it’s just not her natural place. its weird and wrong.

so yeah i hope this gurl acts honorably because its SAD to see a qt innocent young white gurl be a DUMPSTER FIRE. just do what michelle k did and Resign. or do what the truth will live did and stop youtube but just do twitter only.

of course TTWL is 100% jooish. but uhhhh she was really qt and had great alt right ideas and was converting to Catholic. real interesting case.

but yeah its DISTRACTING unless you have your OWN alt right waifu. and probably most waifus could be MADE alt right with your firm, fair guidance.

this crusader gurl looks like a purer, more innocent, lower number gurl than evalion, and i dont want to see another young white girl turn into a dumpster fire for the whole internet to see.

dont look for a gurl with political opinions. find a gurl with basically no political opinions, but who has deep moral opinions about not being a slut, about not fooking blacks, about not murdering her babies. that’s all you need. and finding that will be difficult enough!

heh i am actually tempted to write this girl a message because she might actually read it now, rather than 2 weeks from now, when she has EXPLODED in popularity.

well, sinead has probably already told her how horrible TRS is.

basically TRS needs to take this girl under their wing and use her as a TRS propaganda person. TRS are good, strong, smart men. I trust them hehehe.

hehehe

https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/

https://voat.co/v/talesfromtechsupport

also i saw some bitch saying that its normal for a 30 year old man to take only 6 months to get over a 2 year relship. yeah maybe if you are some sociopath who just views people as bags of meat, BITCH!

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/

loveshack has like 1700 people on it right now, relship forums has like 400 tops. go with loveshack. i am looking for something with a LOT of people.

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/transitioning/friends-lovers/

plus they have a great subforum that is all about That Gray Area where you might be becoming more than friends, or wanting to.

yep the big 400th job app.  next it will be the big 500th hahahaha.

http://archive.is/fdCUL

How to Choose a Wife in a Feminist Society by PA

good blogger, i should directly link to him, got a good alt right racist white mind. i just dont want anyone to know i link to them. go look at his blog and give him a dollar hahahaha.

twitter can be fun sometimes

oh yeah this one was florian geyer. well he doesnt really use it. and his NRx blog only has 2 posts. i was looking to try to find the origin story on this guy cuz i like him. he is great. he is very smart and very funny and will be a great priest but he should have some keeids tho.

here is a guy that is on the fatherland sometimes, seems like a real good guy, and he does a pro family podcast with his WIFE. should prob check that out at some point.

sept 12

welp, was very decisive about getting a haircut today, even though probably didnt really NEED it…..but previous i usually waited TOO long, and today i just wanted to be decisive and get a haircut fairly earlier than last time, PLUS whenever i get a haircut, it boosts confidence, so, really no risk, high reward. waited 66 days this time, 9 weeks or so. this isnt TOO early, I dont think.

had ridiculously disturbing dream with HER in it and it just gets worse. i was bitching at her like  a little bitch, please stop avoiding and ignoring me, just hang out with me already, don’t dump me LIKE THIS, and getting really bitchy and passive aggressive about it, then she was like FINE. FINE. what do you want from me. and then she got up on this ladder or lege or something about 14 feet off the ground and dove headfirst into the ground, grotesquely breaking her own head and neck. absolutely horrifying. that’s not what i was asking for!!!!!! i just wanted to sit down and have an hourlong private talk!!!!

there was an implication that some other guy was also heartbroken and HE had K’d himself the same way, diving headfirst into the ground.

also in another part of the dream, I was grotesquely deformed, like missing half my face, and also that side of my body was all grotestquely deformed. naturally people reacted to the sight of me with horror.  I couldn’t really see myself though, and I didn’t really FEEL horrific.

then I met a qt young woman who was nice to me, did not react with horror, and I wondered, wow, did I miraculously get better somehow? do I really look normal now? or is she just super nice?

so yeah, lot of symbolism there hahahahahahahaha.

and then it went into that super disturbing part with HER and the neck breaking etc. good god how does my brain come up with this horror.

so yeah i am surprised i was not MORE affected by the dream (nightmare!!!!!) but I guess forcing myself to get out and get haircut helped with that.

also in the dream she seemed like a different person. it sorta looked like her, but a more crazy, unstable, bitchy, evil version of her.

basically she did what she did because:

  1. she didnt have Special Feelings for me
  2. She could Get Away with Not Dealing with it.

PERIOD.

some things you are FORCED to deal with. you cant escape from them. this was not one of those things.

i bet she DID feel bad about hurting me. but she did not HAVE to deal with it….so she didn’t. The End. Period. Thats All Folks. That’s ALL it boils down to. I bet she DID feel bad. (Im sure she’s gotten over that LONG ago, though)

2pm sept 2

sheeeeeeeit. sitting at car dealership, they have free wifi thank god. look like a real phaggot wiht muh laptop but this is gonna take at LEAST 90 minutes.

hope nobody steals mh password who is out there packet sniffing hahahahahah.

321 pm

wow that was quick. they said 90 minutes, i expected 2 hours, and i was out of there within 1 hour.

there was a young arab girl reading a Yuge Law Skool Torts Textbook. Good for her going to Law Skool. She looked very bitchy and high maintenance but young and bangable and in Healthy BMI range. not that I advocate Race Mixing but I would bang her if i had to. would not make babies with, OBVIOUSLY!!!!!!

why am i saying this? i guess to get a pity party for my desperation, to describe my desparation, that i would rather bang a healthy young nonwhite than a fat ugly unhealthy white hahahahaha. but i would never BRAG about it or RECOMMEND it hahahahaha.

 

 

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JUST BECAUSE YOU NEED SPACE DOESNT MEAN YOU DONT NEED TO COMMUNICATE

june 5

sheeeeeeeeeeeit.

oh wow found technician job with large manufacturer which the previous generations all started wokring with as soon as they were 18, worked 40 years, raiased white families. now to get a job there you have to be a damn super engineer with a great attitude hahahaha. and above average engineering school performance hahaha. gone are the days of working on the LINE for 40 hours a week and making 20 dollars an hour for tightening a screw, and getting fat and drinking on lunch break and having kids in the white suburbs and getting drunk all weekend hahahahaha.

yesterday i learned that the sleeping stuff in nyquil might be correllated with dementia hahaha. the md doing the study recommends not taking it regularly at all. like me taking it several times a week hahaha. might even take it tonight!

http://archive.is/jAc2e

heh. i guess evalion is a wh0re, she broke this little betabois heart. hahahah stay away from wh0res.

any 18 year old cute white gurl who likes showing her face and body on youtube, getting youtube orbiters and fans, and she talks about nazi 1488 stuff…..totally crazy. would mudshark. would cheat and cuck you. should be treated like any other degenerate wh0re: shamed, shunned, avoided, and forgotten. find a GOOD woman, not a SHITTY woman.

yeah just dont trust any woman on youtube saying gas the k1kes. ok i dont mind wife with a purpose, because she doesnt say gas the k1kes, shes like 40 years old, and has 5 kids, and has been with her husbando like 20 years.

http://bbs.dailystormer.com/t/bbc-whites-need-not-apply-for-trainee-position/32816

well daily stormer isnt private yet i dont think.

oh look the ingredient in nyquil isnt the same one in bendryl which causes dementia.

so i dont WANT a gurl like evalion the mudsharking narcissist sociopath bipolar borderline camwh0re. i want a gurl like That Woman wawawaawawa.

and if i had been a stronger healthier more well adjusted man, i could have had her. but i was too weak and she lost all respect for a weak man, AS SHE SHOULD. As All Women DO : Weak Men Don’t DESERVE women, let alone GOOD women.

if i had been better, stronger, more manly…..then i could have KEPT her. I wouldnt have pushed her away with my weakness, and I would have had a good white wife to have beautiful white children with, and we would luv each other till def do us part hahahahahaha.

because women are not like regular adults. they are somewhere between a child and an adult. closer to a child tbhfam hahahaha. and its just bad when an adult leans on a child. the child cant support an adult during the adults time of need.

june 6

had dumb dream with THAT WOMAN, well its been a few days so i guess i can expect 5 straight days of dreams with her hahaha. in this one i saw her and she was civil to me but also cold and emotionless. i was seething with anger below the surface and being very passive aggressive right off the bat. possibly she was Going Back To School. She talked about how she was doing great with her Husband. Oh, your HUSBAND? I didnt know you got married. Well, he’s not my husband yet, havent had the wedding yet.

then she says he works at this place I was at earlier in the dream where I was assisted by a very friendly normie alpha male who was mixed race. But he had strong white features and was tall and strong and quite handsome, except he had mocha brown skin and frizzy hair. He was very friendly and charismatic and confident. Seemed like a decent guy.

I described the guy and she said yep thats him!!!!!!! squeeeeeeeee!!!!!!! And I thought, well it figures she is in luv with a nonwhite hahahaha. but he actually seems ok and is more of a real man than me.  he is going to college to become a NURSE.

10 years ago I would have thought this was gay, but now I respect it. If you get a BSN degree, you can go far in life. ANd it takes a dedicated, hard working person to do that, and usually a moral person too. I know there is a stereotype about nurse women being batshit crazy, but I think the ones doing the more “hardcore” nursing of the BSN are….well they’re still crazy, but I think they are more moral too. not dirty pill popping cheaters.

also the Previous Woman did a BSN and she became hugely successful and had a great work ethic and she was decent to me.

so her HUSBAND was on a good career path. her handsome, big, strong, mulatto husband she was head over heels in love with. she doesn’t do much but hang out with him, she really luvs him.

So you gonna invite me to the wedding? probably not uh? (i was so passive aggressive.)

then she started getting more angry and said NO, because you didn’t even lift a finger to try to stay friends with me, you made no effort to stay in contact with me, I figured you didnt want to be friends anymore,

then I exploded, wrong wrong! I was heartbroken because YOU threw me away like a piece of GARBAGE! I thought YOU wanted nothing to do with me ever again! I was putting effort in and begging you to put effort in, but you just ignored and blocked me!

she just rolled her eyes and said whatever, repeated her thing about me obviously not being invested in the relship, then she ignored me and looked back to her College Studies to indicate this conversation was over, and I was enraged hahaha.

i recall she looked sluttier in the dream and maybe had some tattoos, where in real life she didnt look like a slut at all, and had no tattoos.

so i was furious, and i was being blamed again. i wanted her to admit some responsibility. not blame it all on me.

there was an earlier part of the dream, after I saw her big tall strong handsome mulatto Husbando, then I actually saw her in some back office, where she was working peacefully near this other woman I went to grade school with, who I should have pursued because she seemed like a really nice gurl hahahahaha. when we were 12 and 13 years old.

somehow we were talking about religion of all things, and I was like, so you guys like MARY? The Blessed Virgin Mary, Mother Of God?

and they were both like, no, not really, don’t really care for MARY that much, I can take her or leave her, pretty indifferent tbh, no big deal, idk, ikr, lol.

and I was just dumbfounded at this casual attitude towards MARY. i thought it was kinda disrespectful and disgusting.

of course, only CATHOLICS put a huge emphasis on MARY. I imagine other christians just dont think about Mary much. but STILL. the womens attitude in this dream seemed more disrespectful than some protestant who doesnt think about Mary a lot.

maybe it symbolizes how I really like Mary and she is my role model for Women. so it REALLY rustled muh jimmies to hear women saying, yeah i dont really care about Mary. Cuz essentially Mary is my IDEAL WOMAN hahahahaha.

heh. if someone wants SPACE from you, its ALSO their responsibility to define that SPACE and tell you exactly what they want you to do or dont do. and not use it as an excuse to avoid you indefinitely and avoid talking about your mutual issues indefinitely.  thats not SPACE, thats RUNNING AWAY. dont RUN AWAY and call it NEEDING SPACE. you have to COMMUNICATE.

yeah you can push away someone who initially just wanted space……but taking the space and never communicating looks a lot liek running a way. fook looks like, it IS running away.

go ahead, take your SPACE…….but COMMUNICATE!!!!!!!

just because you have space doesnt mean you get to treat the person with SILENT TREATMENT and avoiding!

because you want to know whats going on and i wanted space, now YOURE the bad guy and I get to upgrade my Space to the Silent Treatment and Blocking you entirely!

you want space, youre gonna have to show some GOOD FAITH and give some sort of detailed statement. write me a damn two page paper. more than 5 sentences. be sure to include a time when this ends. stop hiding shit from me. i will give you space but you gotta tell the WHOLE truth.

un fookin believable. pay 5 dollars to get a PDF of my Official Transcript but then it EXPIRES after like 7 or 8 weeks. 50 days I think. WOW. JUST WOW. And now I can’t get back into my own fooking transcript that I paid 5 dollars for a fooking pdf.

well I dug up an “unofficial” transcript. damn.

heh. now I have a 10 page “PACKET” that includes:

long resume, long cover letter, list of references, 2 letters of recommendation, and now “unofficial” transcripts of university undergrad and “postbacc” 70 credits of “useful” business and “IT” classes at “College.”

sending this shit out for 10 dollar an hour jobs hahahaha.

maybe that woman is going back to skool to finish her bachelors degree so she can get a better job and doesnt have to work in a 15 dollar an hour call center the rest of her life hahahaha. while her mulatto husband gets a BSN and they are madly in luv with each other forever.

OH WAIT, THAT PART ISNT REAL.

That’s another problem with these dreams. they are essentially more real to you than the reality, because this is all you get.

i just hate getting BLAMED FULLY for this. I dont mind sharing the blame. I will admit some responsibility. but i really want her to admit some responsibility too. don’t blame this ALL on me. im not even sure shes doing that. And I will NEVER be sure.

ooosh only 3 jobs applied today. looking at the jobs and feeling very low confidence. bad.

ok 4. with some “hip” outdoor company that asks what kind of music do you like on the fooking application. fooking phaggots. music is for DEGENERATE PHAGGOTS.  i was honest and told them the sick metal I listened to, because metal is now Cool and Gainfully Employed Millennials Like Metal, and also told them the Cool Guy Nonmetal stuff as well.

DESPAIR FORUM POST

Bless you for being willing to be there for him and to stand by him during this tough time! It warmed my heart to hear that there are people like you in the world. Depression is such a big factor in the end of so many relationships, and so often, it seems like the depressed person is blamed for pushing the other person away, or expect the other person to “fix” them or “cure” them, etc.

And I am sure this does indeed happen! At the same time, however, I am a big fan of making an effort to solve problems, and making an effort to communicate about things, and to put in the work to improve a relationship, rather than just dumping a person and leaving them in the lurch. So I am glad you are giving him a chance, rather than saying “Not my problem! You’re too much to handle! I’m done with you!”

BUT severely depressed people CAN be overbearing on their partners! And I think he is responsible for communicating with you. I have a pet peeve about silent treatment. I hate people ignoring and avoiding me. You can have space, but don’t try to avoid me indefinitely. I can’t read your mind. (I guess I am speaking to someone who recently hurt me by dumping me using avoiding and the silent treatment.)

Anyway, I am the world’s biggest fan of communication, and that would clearly be a very important thing to do here. But how do you make someone communicate, who doesn’t WANT to communicate, when you are very much wanting to communicate with them?!?! I wish I could tell you. I had the same problem. It seems like the classic “you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make them drink.”

So maybe let him know you will be there for him, but you are really worried, and starting to become frustrated, and you would really appreciate if he communicated with you after X days of “space.”

I don’t have a problem with needing space, but when the other person uses “space” as an excuse to avoid communication indefinitely……that infuriates me! And “space” is NOT a valid reason to avoid communication indefinitely. Ideally, the person who wants space, would also agree to communicate throughout the period of space, and also agree on a firm date when the “space” would come to an end.

I wonder if he would be willing to write you emails while he is having his “space?” I am a big fan of writing emails because a lot can be said in them. Important stuff that one might be too nervous to say face to face. Sometimes I get so emotional or afraid that I can’t say what I want to say, how I want to say it. So I prefer writing the person a long letter or email. Maybe he would be willing to do that. He’s got to be willing to do SOMETHING. Maybe he’s not strong enough to “meet you halfway”, but if he can’t meet you at least 1% of the way, then the relationship becomes totally one-sided.

I know if I were having problems with a loved one, I would be desperate to do whatever it took to keep them from leaving me, hahaha. I really don’t like being left, haha. But something like making an appointment with a therapist and having a group meeting, so the therapist can ideally help communication between both parties. Of course, me being willing to do this still wasn’t enough to keep the other person from leaving me. If they want to leave….there’s nothing you can do to stop them.

Sorry, that sounded terrible! I am just coming out of a relationship where the person was not willing to put in any effort, and I was willing to do whatever it took to save the relationship. They left me, and I was ridiculously devastated for months.

Anyway good for you to be willing to make some effort during the tough times, but also try not to let him have power over you with his silence and stubbornness. Easier said than done I know! Maybe he would be willing to write you emails and to give SOME kind of meaningful communication while he is having his “space.”

Good luck and please keep us posted!

END POST

woman dealing with her desparing boifran, who has clammed up and wants space and she wants to support him but he wont talk, and she is afraid and frustrated. I was just glad she was WILLING TO PUT IN EFFORT and didnt just say pffft fook this shit ima find a stronger better man, this should be all fun all the time. a woman willing to STAND BY HER MAN through GOOD TIMES AND BAD. that is a damn beautiful thing.

i dont want to get in a rel with anyone because i cant imagine WANTING to get in a rel with anyone but HER even though i havent seen her in 11 months hahahaha.

i can envision banging sluts though. casual hangouts. this IS degenerate  but its 6000000 times more degen for the women than the men. i dont need to tell YOU why, but I do need to Mansplain to Women: Because Women Can Get Preggers!

and this is why so many people do casual secs, because they dont WANT a rel, and it hurts to think SHE is doing exactly that, having casual secs with guys because she doesnt want a rel. she is out there being a degen slut when i wanted her to be waifu 4 lyfe, mother of muh white children. she is just a casual slut. and most women are. or go through large periods of their life where they are casual sluts. same thing.

and i can’t even talk to the other 30 year old virgin males on despair forums who talk about maybe trying to practice on MILFs from tinder, without catladies on DF saying dont dehumanize them and treat them like low hanging fruit!

in other words women causing drama because they dont know what to say to men with Gurl Problems. This stuff needs to be in a MEN ONLY forum because women really have nothing useful to say here. They either Shame, or they give useless, wrong, if well-intentioned, “advice.” they cannot possibly understand what the man is going through. but other men, like me, DO. i give them much better advice hahaha. like i hear ya man, its rough, ive been through the same thing, women think im weird and i havent made out with a gurl in 10 years and even back then they thought my lack of experience was weird. so i say bend the truth and just try to get some experience with this milf. there will probably be stupid drama and flakeouts, but it will be some experience and hopefully you learn a little more about dealing with women’s bullshit and can be more confident when you approach more attractive women later.

and if 40 year old catladies read that, they go rabble rabble rabble and get all butthurt hahahaha. i mean i can totally see why. they cant handle the truth, thats why hahahahahahaha. the truth hurts. yeah the truth hurts me too. basically that i am not valuable enough to pull a woman as valuable as THAT WOMAN. she was OUT OF MUH LEAGUE. and i thought that her having no father, and her fam being a slightly lower Social Class than my fam, would help my odds a little bit, hahaha.  maybe if she were a huge slut, were a few years older, and had at least one kid, then THAT would help, hahahaha. oy vey.

 

 

 

 

YOU WILL DRINK THE BLACK SPERM OF MUH VENGEANCE

may 28

that title is from a nile song on the “festivals of atonement” ep from 1995 hahaha. or 1997.

heh. couldnt sleep last night having work worries, like should i take the post office job. i kinda wish i had never even applied for the post office hahahaha. not sure what would be the less shitty job. city carrier, or mail processing clerk.

https://toughnickel.com/industries/CCA-Survival-How-to-Make-it-Through-Your-Postal-Trial-by-Fire

https://toughnickel.com/industries/CCA-Bootcamp-What-to-Expect-During-your-Brief-but-Brutal-Letter-Carrier-Initiation

https://toughnickel.com/misc/So-You-Want-to-Be-a-Mailman-The-CCA-Experience

heh this is not really changing that very uncertain feeling in muh gut

this author “mel carriere” hahahah is actually a very funny and good writer. There are some very intelligent people who currently work in the PO who write very articulate screeds on the internet. but he has a good sense of humor which i do not think i would share.

heh i am now feeling very bad about post office. my gut feeling says no. ok. its ok to feel the feelings. if i were ACTUALLY DESPERATE that would be a LOT different. If I had kids to take care of or i was gonna get thrown out on the street. and many people ARE!!!!! and god bless them and take care of them. but i dont need that help. I recognize muh privilege. and I know that I am too big of a crybaby and not tuff enough to handle this type of stuff.

basically every job that starts you out at 15 bucks an hour is gonna have a CATCH. where it basically sucks so bad you struggle not to RAGEQUIT.

better to shoot for 12 dollars an hour and never have a wife and kids. just bang 20 year old sluts. ok fine. i mean I would like to have a wife and kids. but as an alternative, and not nearly a perfect replacement, I’ll take banging 20 year old sluts.

I kinda felt this way after I finally got over Woman2012 and before I fell in luv with woman2015.

now I can see how insignificant woman2012 was to my life. we barely hung out, barely knew each other.

woman2015 was a lot more significant. we talked and texted and hung out regularly and she told me secrets.

i am kinda butthurt that I was there for her when she needed me, but she left me in the lurch when I really needed HER.

Ok so I need to come up with a good story when the post office offers me their shitty job hahahaha. say sorry but I’ve accepted another offer. With the county water dept hahahahahahaha.  and then tell the water dept i cant take their shitty job because i accepted an offer with the post office hahaha.

well the best bet is this interview i have next week with a FT City job. department clerk. Maybe it will be like a mini call center taking calls 75% of the day. but it is a lot closer and the hours are 9 to 5 and pays like fooking 18 dollars an hour horry sheet.

well. how much of the day would I permit to be Active On Phone Calls for that job? maybe as much as 65% hahahaha. its 5 miles away, 18 bucks an hour, no split shifts, weekends off. consistent schedule.

so yeah I think I will just put the brakes way on the post office stuff.

i was driving down this one street close to home and there is a big industrial area there including a big FEDGOV installation and I was thinking, yep would be nice to get a job there, thats where successful people work hahaha. and then right near there there was a building affiliated with the local college that seemed to promote technical training. like for smarty pants machining and assembly jobs. the college website didnt seem to have too much info on how to actually take classes in this building.

but i am toying with the idea of taking classes to make myself look less lazy. make self look marginally less lazy, by taking 1 class a semester, and having the occasional interview. not bad plan uh?

classes are expensive though. so thats why you only take 1 at a time hahaha.

oooosh. had to fight temptation to look at HER profile on linkedin. cuz i know she is permanently out of a job now and she will prob get a job a lot faster than I will. but WHERE? i know for a fact things are drastically changing in HER life, and I DO want to know where she goes next. somewhere better? somewhere worse? another Call Center? something with LEadership? something that I need to be better than? and she doesn’t care what I’m doing. so Im glad I fought that urge. she was never active on linkedin, but being out of a job and looking for a new one is a good reason to start getting active on linkedin.

I WAS THERE FOR HER, WHY COULDNT SHE BE THERE FOR ME?

well because i was asking too much.

well i WASNT really. I wasnt asking her to be in luv with me, i was just asking her to talk to me and end the rel in a respectable way.

but she was too confused to realize that. she didnt want to understand that.

and she didnt want to make the effort to understand because she just blocked me!

oh well life goes on and i can make up lies as why to not take this post office job. welp they must have chosen that black guy instead hahahahaha. oh well looks like i was guilty of being white. white mans burden, lloyd.

hahahaha.

i am a proud white man but i have the WORK ETHIC of the laziest inger hahaha. i dont want to work, i dont believe hard work will make you free, i dont believe in the american dream, i just want to coast, i am indolent and insolent and shifty and shiftless and surly.

a white man with a black mans work ethic. this is absolutely shameful and degenerate.

heh. well at least I KNOW its shameful and degenerate.

my new thing is to drink 3/4 a cup of 2% milk in the afternoon while waiting for muh Big Meal of Dinner. Actually, to mix in that milk with a cup of coffee, so i am drinking a large very milky coffee.

really i just want to go back to high school and do all the things right that I did wrong. like maybe got into a STEM high school or a vocational program in high school, like some high schools have good Career Prep stuff and teach you machining and Electronics and stuff like that.

Well I didnt really have a lot of say in what high school I went to. I went to a college prep high school so, i was gonna get prepared for college.

thats ok too. I should have just eased off on the AP classes and went to community college or trade school or, at most, local university. NOT a highly-selective, well-known, successful, middle class, high-expectations university at age 18 like I did.

I didnt realize that getting a bad attitude in college would mess up muh life so much. I had a terrible attitude during high school and I got into a very good college. I had a terrible attitude in college and now I have had a TERRIBLE outcome in life. I was expecting tedious, boring, and average at worst. I had no idea how bad it could get hahahaha.

like, get a degree from this well-known school, any degree, even a useless degree, and get a boring job as an office drone.

NOPE. YOU WISH.

but I was 18-21 years old and I knew nothing! I just wanted to sm0ke MJ, drink booze, and bang young college qts!

which is itself the WORST attitude you can have while at college. because it jeopardizes your performance in a solid STEM field. but I didnt think you needed solid performance in a solid stem field. MAYBE if I were going to a “worse” college. but with the name recognition here, I could AFFORD to COAST in a useless nonstem degree and that will be enough.

IT WASNT hahahaha.

its not that I see myself as being ABOVE that sort of work. its more than I am TERRIFIED that I am not TUFF ENUFF 2 HANDLE IT. its again like private pyle and boot camp. i KNOW Im not above it!!! It is probably above me!

or is this a case where i need to SAY YES to something, then FACE MUH FEAR?

I just wish there were a less extreme way of facing muh fear than taking such a damn big RISK. Going out and doing interviews, ok thats a fear facing thing I can do, but accepting such a controversial job seems so damn risky for me. i dont want to go ALL IN like this.

i luv the fatherland 1488 dadcast but I wish there were also a podcast for neet virgin incel omega losers. lazy losers like us who have no hope of having a job or a wife and kids like these lucky fools who get to secure the existence of our people and a future for their white children.

wheres the podcast for the neets. the neetcast hahaha. it’s clearly incumbent on me to do it. show agency.

on episode 27 jim made some remark like he gets a lot of childless men asking to be on the show, and or neets, and then he made some remark like NOPE, we have standards here, we only have men with kids, you can send us your questions, but you can’t come on the show. its NOT COMPLICATED. just meet a nice woman and have kids.

so naturally I and all the other neets will find that very patronizing. believe me I would LOVE to JUST find a nice woman who isnt a god damn traitorous whore, who hadn’t taken 100000000 cox. I dont have a high opinion of my self, but I know I’m better than to Create New White Life with some damn gutter slut.

they think its so damn EASY to find a decent woman and to find a decent job. check your normie nonvirgin privilege, chad hahaha.

so yeah I think they should regularly have neets and at least childless men on. because we want what they have. we listen to the god damn show.

but should you settle for example, with some slut just because she’s white? also the guys didn’t give nearly as much commentary as I would have liked on a forum thread where guys talk about marrying and having kids with single mothers. I don’t want to marry a single mother but SOME guys have done all right with single mothers. how can we diferentiate the good single mothers from the bad single mothers, knowing that being a single mother is itself very risky red flag?  i mean yeah we’d PREFER a woman who was not already a mother!

anyway i just want these guys to understand how hard it is to find a woman who is WORTH having kids with, who isnt a damn whore with 10+ guys. I want a neet or incel to come on the show and give them those hard questions:

should you marry a woman who has been with 10+ guys? has YOUR wife been with 10+ guys? would you marry her if she had?

you do understand many guys have to settle for single mothers because they can’t find decent women who don’t have children. better to just assume they’ve learned from their mistake, rather than they would repeat their mistake.

so yeah hopefully jim goes back on his anti-neet hatred. childless guys are listening to this show because they WANT TO BECOME LIKE YOU. So give them the respect of coming on the show. dont just tell us to have some kids.

BECAUSE WE DONT WANT TO HAVE KIDS with these women!!!!!!!! we want to have kids with GOOD women, like you guys have! you guys actually Luv your wives! and aren’t just knocking up some tattooed slut! you make fun of tattooed sluts just like we do!

applied for the same 26000 dollar entry level county job i applied to 2 weeks ago. they reposted the posting and allowed me to apply again. this time i included two letters of recommendation as opposed to just once like last time.

i forgot about the frustration of applying to the SAME JOBS over and over again because they didnt contact you the first time. it pays less than the post office, but you have a much easier time getting a job at the post office. or a damn call center hahahaha.

i guess if its hard to get……then the better the job IS, right??!?!?!?!?! so I WANT a job thats hard to get. but they’re just so hard to get!!!!!!

reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee just have some kids with the dirty herpes hepatitis bar slut with the neck tattoo and then we can be on your podcast hahahaha. men become deadbeat fathers because the MOTHERS are total shit hahahahaha. you dont abandon your child if you’re having the child with a quality woman!!!!!! if the woman is a train wreck then you run the fook away!!!!

yeah its wrong, yeah you should take care of your kids, but its a lot easier when you love and respect the mother of your children is all i’m saying. and these guys clearly do. they need to RECOGNIZE and respect how hard it is to find a woman like that.

may 29

black pigeon releases a sequel to his controversial and popular vidya hahaha. not a fan of the pornographic (hahahaha) thumbnail but also he does not seem like a butthurt mgtow woman hater either. just speaking from more of a red-pill, pro-white alt right perspective that women vote for antiwhite leaders who bring in more and more outsiders. that women are shitty at defending their ingroup…..but thats not their job, that’s mens job. but they have been given the political power to destroy their ingroup.

so, IMHO, men need to step up and defend the ingroup by preventing women from voting, hahahaha. if every man could keep at least one woman from voting, that would be great.

IDEAS MAN!!!!!!!

so how would you do that?

i dunno do vote shaming. like only sluts and weird weird crazy batshit women vote. oh you vote? you must be a crazy slut catlady who cant get a man. and youre not strong and independent either. youre just crazy and NO ONE LIKES YOU. cool people dont want to hang out with you. the only people that want to hang out with you are losers. the only people that want you are loser creepy men who can’t pull a better woman.

YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE, BABY?

CREEPBAIT.

oh yeah. had stupid dream with THAT WOMAN again. this is like 3 times in one week, this is RIDICULOUS. And I am actually starting to get over her too! and then the most dreams ever.

Here I was hanging out with 2 male friends, and her, and she was ignoring me and flirting with my male friends. naturally I got butthurt and jealous and mad and started getting angry at her. of course the second you get angry at a woman, you’re the bad guy, so she said something like see this is why I don’t want to hang out with you, your friend is way cooler than you. also I was possibly a little disappointed that my freinds werent taking more of a BROS BEFORE HOES approach.

thing is, she wasnt like that AT ALL. I’ve known other women who were, like woman2004, and yeah that was kinda convenient because it made it a lot easier to hate the woman. and no, no woman was ever doing any serious moves on any of my real close friends.  thank GOD!!!!!

anyway That Woman wasn’t really like that. I don’t want to mischaracterize her and say She’s Like All Women and All Women Are Like That…..because its not true.

so in that sense the dream was bad and inaccurate.

but it didnt really BOTHER me that much thank GOD.

ok one other point. I have been worried that I’m gonna misremember her as our entire relationship was a farce, a relationship simulator, that there was nothing there, that it was a totally one sided rel, much like it was with…..most women i have gotten feelings for.

when its pretty clear there WAS a substantial, real, long term relationship there. and it’s important to me just to recognized that THAT HAPPENED. THAT WAS REAL. that WASNT all in my mind.

And I worry that because of the way it ended, I will remember the relship wrong, and say, welp, its just another woman where the WHOLE REL WAS A FARCE/FRAUD/SIMULATION.

but it wasn’t. many things with women WERE, but NOT THIS ONE. and I don’t want to get confused there. and I have beeen so confused lately hahaha.

what helped me here was I thought about the few other women I had had Real Friendships with. Specifically two other women. maybe 3. I never fell in LUV with them, but we WERE actual friends who hung out regularly and got along well and they didn’t AVOID me and they liked me as a person and thankfully I never Got Feelings.

Anyway we eventually drifted apart with no hard feelings, and many years later, I can STILL look back and say, yep, we had an Actual, Bona Fide, NOnsimulated, Decent Friendship for a decent period of time. I wish them nothing but the best. And I don’t need their reassurance now that the friendship WAS real. I KNOW it was real and thats good enough for me.  and this friendship is in a much different class than all those fake, aborted, farce pseudo-rels I had with other women.

so yeah I don’t want to remember my rel with That Woman as a PSEUDOREL, when it WASNT.

But thinking of the OTHER women I have had legit, bona fide friendships with, it REASSURED me that I won’t misremember things in that way in a few years.

In conclusion, I will be able to look back on That Woman and say yeah, we did have a REAL, legit Relationship. It just ended in the worst way EVER.

just transferred 73 dollars from mturk into muh bank account. gettin paid hahahaha. doesnt feel bad.

also maybe “pseudorel” is a bad word for what I had with Those Other WOmen. I really don’t BLAME myself for getting feelings. Maybe we didnt spend a LOT of time together over the long term, maybe they didnt tell me their deepest darkest secrets and introduce me to their families, but they told me the basics about themselves and offered their  young nubile fertile bodies to me, and I being a young, innocent, naive NiceGui, that activated endorphins and oxytocin and vasopressin in my brain, and I Bonded with them. established an Emotional Connection with them. so that I was confused and very disappointed to see that they could be DONE with me so quickly and easily. Didn’t they BOND with me too? and if they did, how could it disappear so quickly? wtf was WRONG with THEM?

so yeah I don’t blame myself too much there.

maybe is wasn’t a total pseudo rel, but it still wasnt a rel deep rel or a two sided rel.

and at one time, for 2 years, I had a real, nonpseudo, two sided rel with That Woman. I just hoped she would REcognize and Appreciate that. But just because she didnt doesnt mean it doesnt exist.

although lately i’ve been going through a very irrational stage where I am just confused in everything and I doubt everything. how do we KNOW anything. at war with reality hahaha. you cant prove ANYTHING. nothing is REAL. ONLY DEATH IS REALLLLLLL hahahaha.

hahahahha death is real funny hahahah

what about woman2012? was that a pseudorel?

well…..yes and no. it was one sided from the beginning. but she was a nice, honest, moral person. but it was so one sided yeah I can’t say it was ever a REAL rel. but she had good will and good faith. she was just retarded at dealing with men plus she was OBSESSED with her schoolwork. which paid off bigtime for her. well good for her. also when she finally rejected me she did it in the Best Way Ever: Open and Honest Communication.

but yeah that gave me some sense of peace: that I didn’t need HER to CONFIRM that YES, we DID have a REAL Relationship. Just like I don’t need my other female friends to Confirm. Although I’m sure they would be willing to if I Reached out and asked them. But I don’t feel any NEED to. I am SECURE in the knowledge.

fatherland 027 hate to bash jim the anti-neet so much because nick b steves had some GREAT points in this episode, was a great guest. great points on porn like it makes things that arent supposed to be sexual, sexual, so men can’t even TALK to women. they see a woman holding a pen and get nervous and sweaty thinking of porn women holding dicks. the majority of time they spend with women is seeing this artificial hyperstimulus. so they cant interact with women in real life. very sad.

or the idea that gayness is hypersexuality. not EVERYTHING is SEXY.

or the idea that men used to do some pretty gay things together with their male friends but no one even THOUGHT about the gay aspect because gayness wasnt so accepted and tolerated. so you didnt need to say “no homo” every time you complimented a man.

but yeah jim I think you need to rethink your policy. bend a little on this one. have a neet on once in a while. not just the best of the best, one time only. but how about the worst of the worst. like us. hahahaha. we WANT TO BE LIKE YOU remember. we are just STRUGGLING and feel like we are LOSING that battle. support us and pump us up. it’s all about the 14 words. we want the same thing you do. we just would prefer to father our white children with white women who have been with less than 10 guys and have not had any unrepented abortions.

when you have secs with guys so easily it shows a lack of respect for human life.

when you have abortions so easily it shows no respect for human life.

when you discard and replace guys so easy, it shows no respect for human life, that you view people as interchangeable objects.

its SOCIOPATHIC. you put a wall between yourself and the humanity of others.

just the propensity to HURT OTHERS with NO REMORSE. that is what bothers me about women. they just DONT CARE. and this undergirds their approach to secs, abortion, relationships. its DISTURBING and MORALLY WRONG.

do the life creation process with strangers.

casually kill your babies.

casually cut off people who have feelings for you.

all with no remorse, guilt, or shame.

THATS what I dont like about women.

Theyre evil sociopaths. little satans hahahaha.

it seems wrong to FORGET about PEOPLE so easily.

I wouldnt be so butthurt if they showed MORE remorse. just show some damn remorse and i’d feel a LOT better. but even THAT’s too much to ask.  and that’s ridiculous. in an ideal world, you would ask them to feel remorse AND not do evil things. Now you BEG them to just feel remorse for the evil things they do……and they cant even do that.

EVIL BITCHES AND WHORES!!!! LITTLE SATANS!!!! ALL AROUND US!!!!!!!

I dont even trust the WHITE ones. And I trust WHITES in general. well….white MEN. White MEN are by far my favorite group on other, and I am very glad to BE one.

YOUR A FOOKING WHITE MALE! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!!!!

i guess dont get mad at women for race mixing because they just dont care about race. ok fine.

but I REFUSE to believe that women just dont care about LIFE, or that they are INCAPABLE of caring about LIFE.  So I will NEVER be soft on them for promiscuity or abortion. Which I guess may be mores serious crimes than race mixing. not that race mixing isnt fooking disgusting!

so much women do is SO FOOKING DISGUSTING!!!! MORALLY REPREHENSIBLE! ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING!

ABSOLUTELY DEGENERATE

absolutely degenerate

hey im also critical of myself, not just evil women.

but i dont go around spraying sperm into errant cvnts and playing around with LIFE the way THEY do. I dont discard people like used Con-doms.  Failing to live up to your potential seems like a minor sin compared to that!

I just want to be treated like a HUMAN BEING by women, hahahaha. is that so much to ask hahaha.

how come women can’t treat humans like humans?

because theyre evil sociopaths!!!! OBVIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!

I WOULD NEVER TREAT WOMEN THE WAY THEY HAVE TREATED ME!!!!!!!!!

THAT is why I Hate Women!!!!!

I would STILL never treat them the way they have treated me!

Because I TREAT PEOPLE THE WAY I WOULD LIKE TO BE TREATED!!!!!!

I have very low self esteem and dont really like myself that much, but I still want to be treated NICELY! So I am NICE to other people! Including women and nonwhites! I am nice to EVERYONE as a RULE!

so yeah basically i discovered that I DONT NEED HER to TELL ME that we had a REAL Friendship.

And this is reassuring. because before I doubted my ability to KNOW anything, to trust my on mind, essentially. That I was losing my grip on reality and I didnt know what was real and what was imaginary. In terms of my Rels with Women I mean, not in a schizo sense where you hallucinate shit.

but still its VERY distrubing to think that your mind can be SO WRONG on something SO IMPORTANT to you, that you can’t tell reality from your imagination. VERY distrubing. of course the WOMEN do play a role in that as well. they shouldnt be cutting you off so harshly. they should be treating you like a human being. I AM NOT AN ANIMAL! I AM A HUMAN BEING!

they should respect that NOT EVERYONE’S OXYTOCIN RECEPTORS ARE AS FOOKED UP AS YOURS (i mean their own).

NOT EVERYONE YOU FOOK IS AS FOOKED UP AS YOU ARE, BITCH hahahaha

some of us still think The Life Creation Process MEANS something.

EXCUSE ME for having RESPECT for LIFE AND THE PROCESS THAT CREATES IT.

EXCUSE ME for treating the people I do the Life Creation Process with LIKE HUMAN BEINGS. JEEEZ.

I like this young female golfer jessica korda, she is just beautiful. my ideal woman probably. young, non potatoey, natural blond, very innocent looking. horry sheet.

much beautiful, very wow hahahaha

she has this very young, girlish, innocent look to her, like she hasnt been with too many guys. i hope she hasn’t.

anyway I would totally marry her hahahaha. not likely to happen tho haha.

technically I saw pictures of “gay porn” today as I did an mturk task, approving pictures for apparently a gay male dating site as clean or dirty. some of the perverted degenerates took Dick Pics or even pictures of their gay assholes. the Instructions even showed a man sucking another mans dick and another man sticking a dildo up his ass. (as an example of what would be considered SEXUAL and should be rejected) I did not stare at those pictures too long. I finished the task and decided to not take any more from that group.

the user submitted pictures did not contain gay sex but did have a few Selfies of their Dicks and Gay ASsholes.

I mean that jessica korda is just RADIANT. She looks like a nice sweet gurl. I could be very very wrong but I do like that look a lot. My female FORMER friend had that look kinda. other times she looked like an ice cold bitch. But she was actually really really really nice. until the end. when she was really ice cold. that sucked.

anyway I do not count these gay pictures towards my porno strike. which stands at 202 days so far. basically I had to intentionally seek out the porno and probably massage the meat while watching it. typically what men do with porno. but yeah i have since then decided to go on strike and never look at it again. it can bring me NOTHING good. I encourage ALL men to CEASE THIS F4GGOTRY AT ONCE.

It can ONLY do you good to NEVER look at it again.

oh fook you johns hopkins organ donation, did it ever occur to you that i finished the survey and THEN accepted then HIT, because sometimes you forget to accept the hit before clicking on the survey, but YOU have the power to prevent that?

I sent them a dispute and hopefully they arent little bitches to me. youre working for johns hopkins, you are already a winner in life and can probably pull a good mate and definitely a good job. and i dont care about the 15 cents, I care about my Worker Reputation. it’s not easy to keep it above 99%.  every rejection knocks you down a LOT, just like in real life life, and if you’re rejected more than 1% of the time, you’re consiered a loser.

this Korda gurl is of CZECH descent. well good for her. I like Czechs. some beautiful slavs there. Would bang hahahaha. would marry/10 hahahaha

WOULD FATHER WHITE CHILDREN WITH/10

we slavs probably are more emotional and hot-blooded than the cool-headed, more rational aryan hyperborean ubermensch, but thats just the way it is.

Maybe That Woman was so cowardly to me because she was not a Slav so she could not relate to me on my level. She was a Scots or Irish or something. I think. Well this is BS, I think all Whites are capable of being decent to each other, whether they are a Slav or a Saxon.

Should I have KNOWN BETTER, getting feelings for a Non-Slav?

I think this is going a bit too far. I luved her just as much as I could luv any Slav woman, any HUHWHYTE woman.

they say its not luv, its infatuation. this is disqualifying the validity of your fee fees.

MUH FEELINGS ARE VALID! If I say I luved you, then its luv!

This is different that if she feels betrayed, then I betrayed her. no, i didnt DO that. you can TEST that. just like you could TEST that I luved her. she didnt luv me, fine, that’s valid, i agree with that. BUT DONT TELL ME HOW I FEEL!!!!!!!!!!

AND DONT TELL ME I DID SOMETHING I DIDNT!!!!!

At this point, thank GOD, I am over the Betrayal Issue, ie I just dont care any more.

she can think whatever her idiot brain thinks, but shes WRONG. just like I was WRONG about……..well I wasnt WRONG for luving her. It’s no surprise i fell in luv with her. And I never thought my chances were GOOD. I was just WRONG to think she would have more courage and spine here.

whys it so important to me that SHE felt the rel was important to HER? well because that is necessary for it to be a Real Rel and not a Pseudorel that was all in my mind, THATS WHY.

If you WANT an explanation, you wont be satisfied with ANY explanation hahahaha.

so you could say the same about me wanting an explanation from her!

well i didnt really want an EXPLANATION, I jsut wanted SOMETHING. Well, I wanted Kindness and Respect and Courage and to be treated like a Human Being. I don’t care about an explanation. The explanation is she’s Just Not That Into Me. I already KNOW the explanation.

I am more concerned with being Tuff Enough to handle Tuff Jobs like Post Office where you get RODE all day.

We really didnt get RODE much at the stupid call center. Sure there was a gentle push to be like yeah theres a little room for improvement here, but I know your job is tuff and you’re doing good, you are generally really good. i guess its nothing like that at the post office. supervisors follow you around in their cars to make sure you are going fast enough. you cant go to the bathroom. you know why they dont even knock on the door when they have a package?

BECAUSE THEY DONT HAVE TIME TO WAIT AN EXTRA 10 SECONDS FOR EVERY PACKAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!

because the new people are held to the same standard as the veterans!

because the standards are already ridiculous! it is VERY DIFFICULT to meet the BARE MINIMUM! its one thing to get bitched at if you are slacking. but when you are busting ass trying to do the bare minimum, and getting bitched at…..you need to hire more people and give them more time to do it. replace broken equipment that causes processors and then clerks to start late.

or if you want the routes done faster, have more people do them.

or train them better.

i mean thats why they hire PSE’s, to avoid paying career people overtime.

yet they often give pse’s a lot of overtime.

so………….why not just hire more pse’s and not pay ANY of them overtime?

I think that would be a win for the company wouldn’t it? also the PSE’s who are not getting any time off would like it.

similar thing in my old company there. there was a lot of overtime . i thought, why didnt they just hire more people?

so heres my theory: because it would cost MORE to hire enough people to find people who are GOOD enough that you would WANT them to work overtime. you just lay off the people who “arent getting it fast enough” but realize they are also expensive for having to pay unemployment.

BUTTTTTTTT….. you hire and lay off a bunch of people ANYWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and the people who don’t stay long probably wont get enough HOURS to be ELIGIBLE for unemployment anyway! you need to make x0000 dollars in the past 5 quarters.

so hire a lot of people LIKE YOU DO ANYWAY, just hire MORE and that way you wont have to pay ANYONE overtime. even if the people you usually give overtime to are your more skilled people.

maybe thats the argument. the skilled people are SO skilled, they add more VALUE being paid OVERTIME than the average person does not being paid overtime.

but when you are working OVERTIME, arent you more likely to be tired and stressed and upset and add LESS value?

and there is a whole CASTE of BUSINESS ANALYSTS who are supposed to use statistics to answer all these legit important questions!

anyway, the answer to things that dont make sense like this is ALWAYS…..because it SAVES money.

so it SAVES MONEY to pay 100 hours of overtime, than to hire 10 new people?

i guess. businesses have been known to be wrong.

because it SAVES MONEY IN THE SHORT TERM. that is the better answer. The shit could be HORRIBLE for the long term, but the SHORT TERM IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN THE LONG TERM.

makes sense right? YOU CANT HAVE A LONG TERM WITHOUT A SHORT TERM!

So I hate how this leads to constantly changing shit that is OBVIOUSLY bad for the long term, just to cut costs in the short term.

FIRST DF POAST IN AT LEAST A MONTH:::::
Great topic and great thoughts by everybody! I know that pain as well.

Not to offer unsolicited advice (hahahaha) I would tentatively lean towards meeting with the “MILF” (some people may quite understandably construe that term as disrespectful, but I know what you mean!) and just trying to have fun meeting someone new who you are attracted to. At the very worst, it will be an interesting story. Maybe think of it like that. Very low expectations, just trying to have fun talking to somebody.

Of course I don’t advocate using fellow human beings purely as “experience fodder” but…..I think experience CAN increase a man’s confidence, and IMHO confidence is so ridiculously important for men to have. Confidence might be THE most important aspect of a man’s personality when it comes to meeting women ( and THE most important thing in preventing depression and low self-esteem. Basically confidence is one of the most important things a man can have, period.) I can say this because I have been very unsuccessful with women and I have very low confidence, hahaha. Only somewhat kidding. But, when I have had some very limited success with women….I was at a relative high of confidence. And certainly this generates the opposite of a vicious circle: a self-perpetuating awesome circle of confidence, if you will, where confidence makes you more successful with women, which in turn makes you even more confident, etc.

Problem is, many of these “confident” guys are also narcissistic DBags as we all have seen, and I agree that these NARCISSISTS are some pretty f’ed up, toxic people, which people with a healthy self-image would not want to be associated with.

But there are also good confident people too. Good confident vs bad confident. Maybe you have a male friend who is a total happy go lucky “normie.” He seems to have everything: decent job, decent relationship, but is also himself a decent guy. Just a really good, decent, well-rounded, admirable guy, who is not a dbag. Well, maybe you don’t know anybody like this! But I am basically trying to describe a man who has a healthy, respectful kind of confidence. A real decent good guy, vs a narcissistic “Bad Boy” Thug. The latter I see as being a Mere Caricature of the Authentic Masculinity presented by the former. I hope I don’t have to explain why one should strive for the authentic over the inauthentic!

I am trying to think of a celebrity or a character I could use as an example of Good Confidence. I can’t really, hahaha. Maybe Hank Hill from King of the Hill. Just a solid, respectable man, who is confident in himself, but also very respectful and kind to others.

So I would still tentatively encourage you to meet up with the older woman, and let us know how it goes. It could be fun, and help your confidence. Or it could be a total clusterf**k, but at least it will be a very interesting story, hahaha.

I don’t really think we need to be worried about you “using the woman for experience” when you have no intention of having a serious relationship with her……because I think there are probably many women on Tinder who go into it with those very same expectations! (Well, they might call it “having fun” or “casual dating” or “meeting new people to hang out with.” Point is, it’s very unlikely this woman will want to marry you on the first date, hahaha, and vice-versa.) The important thing is that you have clear communication of both yours and her expectations and wants, and to not lead anybody on. Just have open, honest, grown-up communication. (I realize this is easier said than done. But I think most of us on DF are emotionally articulate people who are more than capable of communicating their thoughts and feelings to others!)

So I say go for it, just don’t lie to anyone. (I mean in the sense of “leading on” someone who wants a serious relationship, when you don’t. If you’re like me, you’ve only ever been on the receiving end of that and not the giving end! But I worry about accidentally doing to others what has been done to me. Anyway, I don’t think it’s THAT hard not to lead somebody on! Just have open, honest communication.) (Of course you are entitled to not talk about anything you don’t feel comfortable talking about, for example she asks you about other relationships you have had. Then I might “get creative” and bend the truth a little bit, while steering the conversation towards a new topic, with a confident smile, hahaha)

Confidence is SO important to a man’s well-being, and this is an opportunity for you to build confidence without hurting anyone. (Not that I would ever recommend hurting anyone anyway! I am referring to “bad” confidence and narcissism, in which people essentially gain a sense of power by controlling others.)

Good luck and feel free to update!

END POAST

30 year old man in a horrid retail job, and nevergf, kissless virgin, tired of seeing qt gurls all day, with dbags, and he can’t get anyone to swipe right on him on tinder, and he is lonely and frustrated. He is debating whether to go out with a “44 year old MILF” from tinder. I tentatively encourage him to do it.

oh yeah. i havent listened to any milliennial woes for months. i kinda felt guilty so I donated 5 dollas to him the other day IM SO GENEROUS AND KIND.

but I also watched a few recent vidyas and my god they were good and I would give them a DUMPTRUCK of Likes:

 

 

some good stuff about men, women, mgtows, rapeugees, and why women should probably not have the vote because they will gladly WELCOME IN THEIR OWN CONQUERORS, and on some level possibly want to be conquered (my words not MW’s!!!!!!) and they just dont have the long term vision or racial awareness or big picture thinking to see how welcoming hordes of barbaric male rapeugees could POSSIBLY be a bad thing. because we’re helping the needy, and omg those syrian men are so much secsier than the wimpy girly men at home! (again my words not MW’s, but this is kinda what he is saying, in a much more classy way.)

also, MW has a tom petty and the heartbreakers shirt which he wears sometimes in some vidyas, and this might be it. only kewl people like me and MW like TP and the HBs. Always a good sign.

ANYWAY, the guy certainly has not declined in quality and I would like to donate ANOTHER 5 dollars to him this year hahahahaha. there is a damn good REASON he is at the top of muh list. I have just become a bit more 1488 than him hahaha. he needs to stop being so NICE and CIVIL. shit I need to stop being so NICE and CIVIL.

TREAT THESE PIGS LIKE THE PIGS THEY ARE!!!!!!!

OMEGA INCEL TRIGGERED BY YOUNG QTZ

may 27

wanted to quickly say that night before last i had a dream with THAT WOMAN. it sounds worse than it actually was.

also yes I got alot out of her, but I didn’t ASK a lot of her, if that makes sense. I didn’t EXPECT her to luv me back. I only expected her to show me some kindness and effort and talk to me and hang out with me. She didnt have to make a huge effort for me to get energy and a “FIX” from her. She just had to talk to me and be generally nice to me and sometimes hang out with me.

In other words I was not Leaning on her like a crutch and making unreasonable demands from her to halp me with muh derpression. like some people are simply intolerable to their boifrans and their excuse is they have derpression. no i dont do that at all to other people. I see it as my problem to deal with. my cross to bear. i dont push that burden on anyone else. partly because i dont think anybody would understand. partly because thats like Emotional Blackmail. I’m thinking of women who are Bitches to their Doting Husbands. Yeah well I wasn’t bitchy in that way to her, other than begging her to hang out with me. and she wasn’t doting to me at all. she wouldnt even hang out with me.

but yeah she wasn’t really The Bad Guy either, I can understand why she was a coward. I am just concerned about her viewing me as the bad guy. I was awkward and stupid but I wasnt the bad guy.

i wasnt the bad guy, she wasnt the bad guy, but i think she was More At Fault for the shitty situation hahahahaha.

yesterday went for walk in afternoon and mind was RACING. much like it was when i was at previous job. racing and worrying about the job. is this going to be a feature of EVERY job? it wasnt on my previous previous job. i NEVER WORRIED about that job. i could go in, come out, and never think about it. I could do other things in Life, like hang out with friends, even take some College Classes.  no way could I do that with the job I would go to next. which I never would have got if I hadn’t become Close Friends with HER hahahaha. in other words I wish I never met her. she was a Net Loss on my life hahaha. she brought a lot of good at the time……but even MORE bad in the end.

i might be mre willing to do Split Shifts if some of them didnt start at 3 am. and if the place were a little bit closer.

but now i sound like a weak whiner and n199er who is afraid of work! workophobia! real jobs SUCK! get used to it or be a loser the rest of your life!

well not ALL the shifts would be split….would they? these managers seemed OK. but it was hard to say.

elvis worked as a machine operator, truck driver, and was studying to become an electrician. all before the age of 20. but music was his first passion hahahaha.  i am watching stupid tv shows about elvis. i am not a huge elvis fan, but I find the stories of peoples lives interesting. plus he was a white redneck. my kind of person. white redneck playing “negermusik” and probably fooking black bitches hahahahaha. and becoming a bloated pill popping degenerate hahaha.

if the music has drums, its degenerate negermusik! hahahahahaha

but i dont think he was a huge partier when he was young. and his degeneracy is minor compared to average celebrities.

well he cheated on his wife a lot and apparently was into Pills from a fairly young age. Speed, Barbiturates, Quaaludes, Painkillers, Tranquilizers, Benzos.

but he was very generous to his family and friends. buying them houses and cars.

anyway the dream about that woman. I was with her and I was getting angry, yelling at her, HEY STOP. LISTEN TO ME. DONT WALK AWAY. GIVE ME 2 MINUTES. WE NEED TO TALK NOW. I HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO TELL YOU, AND YOU NEED TO LISTEN. YOU SHOULD CARE ABOUT THIS. IT INVOLVES YOU. ITS VERY RELEVANT.

so I was getting mad at her, I was shouting this at her as she was walking away. HEY. DONT LEAVE. LISTEN TO ME! Then she rolled her eyes and stayed, although it was clear she was mad at me and thought I was the bad guy. that I was unreasonable.

Also another part where she was with a female friend of hers (fictional person) and I started raging misogynistically against the other woman, saying you slut, you whore, how many guys you fooked, how many abortions you had, and looked like a raging misogynist in front of my female friend.

another scene where me and that woman were listening to an anti-abortion speaker, who was raging about the horrific evil and cruelty of abortion, of chopping up the innocent infant in the womb, and that woman was getting emotional and upset, and I touched her hand and said there there sweetie, itll be ok, i am here to comfort you.

so that was about it. not sure if the dream is teaching me anything. except that I am a woman hater and that I was the bad guy for wanting to talk to her hahahaha. great lesson. well how do i stop being a woman hater? just stop hating women.  hehe. i dont even deal with any women. I just have contempt for women in general. but individually, I can appreciate individual women once I get to sort of know them even a little bit, like work with them or see them as an actual person.

so uhhhhh if i get a job with women or make women friends I will stop hating women so much? probably.

i didnt hate the women i used to work with. even if they were cheating whores. i got along with mostly everyone. certainly i had no interest in becoming Friends with them if they were cheating whores. but I automatically respected anyone who worked at my job, just for being in the same hell as I was and coming back day after day and sucking it up.

ayo mcdonalds workers. want 15 dollars an hour? get a job as a PSE at the post office. if I have a chance, anybody has a chance. you might not even need high school.  i mean you dont need high school or college anyway, just these f4ggots demand it.

the pse job pays 15-16 an hour.

may 27 1:35 pm: made muh first donation to MILLENNIAL WOES. 5 fookin dollas. this is nothing. I should have done this YEARS ago. I should be a regular supporter and giving him money every month. But I had to finally donate SOMETHING to this guy who has enriched my life and the lives of so many. Need to get some skin in the game. Good shit like him SHOULDN’T BE free.  I SHOULD be donating to him.

Note to Millennial Woes
Keep up the great, important work my lad !!!!!! I would donate more but muh neetism. I should have donated a long time ago but lazy. Will donate more when I resolve my own issues, haha. Don’t stress yourself out! If you want to do a website, IMHO a very important part would be a FORUM where people could qualitypost and especially arrange real life meatspace meetups, somewhat like TRS forum. I bet people in the UK and beyond would be willing to arrange transportation for you to distant locales. Also I would totally buy T-shirts, although I know a bathrobe would be more appropriate. Skype and hangouts are great, but I think real-life meetups are even better. Also I would love for you to find a nice woman and have some mini-Woeses someday!!!!!! If this d’nation features my real name, please don’t go doxing me all over the internet, hahahaha. Hopefully I will be able to donate more soon. You are doing GOD’S WORK!!

2016-05-27_13h38_00

hahahahahah PAT MUH SELF ON THE BACK FOR BEING SO SELFLESS AND ALTRUISTIC hahaha

DO A VERY SMALL GOOD DEED AND THEN TELL THE WHOLE WORLD ABOUT IT.

OHHHHH IM SO GOOOD AND KIND AND MORAL.

BEATING MUH CHEST AND SAYING I AM SO GENEROUS FOR GIVING 5 DOLLARS TO THE NEET PHILOSOPHER.

hahahaha.

I havent even watched a MW video in months. I don’t think he is 1488 enough hahahaha. But I feel an emotional connection with him. he is a kindred spirit. who knows. maybe he is 1488 enough. He definitely cares about the white race I think. THat’s good enough for me. A white who cares about other whites. Good enough to get 5 dollars out of me. Not even enough to buy 1 pack of cigarettes hahahaha. I should have told him to do roll your own cigarettes, that could maximize donation money hahaha.  i am entitled to give him advice and suggestions because now I’m a SUPPORTING MEMBER with my GENEROUS dnation hahaha.

oh shit I should have also told him to look at muh blog hahahaha.

technically I donated more to TRS hahaha. I donated like 6.75 to them. oy vey. well I will make another 5 dollar donation to MW in the next…….7 months hahahaha.

well i can say I am not nearly as PLAGUED with CONSTANT and STRONG thoughts like I NEED to CONTACT her.  I still feel great pain, but remember, a LOT of that pain is coming from my job/life situation too. and at least I have NOT felt the urge to contact her. it took 9.5 months of No Contact but I got there. that is prob my biggest gain. I am signif less tempted to contact her.

I wish she would contact ME tho!

because I still want her. will take at least another 9 months to get over THAT i think.

took .75 of a nyquil dose yseterday and spent 12 hours in bed hahahaha.

heh. whenever I see an attractive young woman, espec under the age of 20, when they are super young and at Peak Hawtness, my first thought is, that fookin little wh0re, i wonder how many cox shes fooked, the little slut, so promiscuous. this is not a good thing to think about white gurls.

shit I mean there are enough arab and albanian gurls that I can get out all my women hate on them. its ok for them to be sluts. well. assuming they get abortions. which they probably wont. not that abortion still isnt barbaric.

i dunno. i dont like being a woman hater, but I can’t shut off the instinctual disgust towards women. like you dirty sluts. you have such a powerful important gift from GOD and then you defile yourselves and show no appreciation for human life.

im against abortion because its harmful.

im against promiscuity because its HARMFUL. at the very least it severely hurts the feeeeelings of the incel crybaby beta bitchboi, when you lose interest in him and replace him with another chad on the carousel. its HURTFUL, it makes him feel really small and expendable. no one deserves to feel like that.

that nazi gurl evalion was shut down from youtube. she is really qt and she knows it and she loved the attention, and I don’t like gurls like this, and hitler cupcakes are just ridiculous, but it’s possible she made some very persuasive and powerful vidyas. I didnt watch any bc qt young gurls are too triggering for me. thats how much I hate women. when I see a qt young woman saying good nationalist pro-white things, I automatically think the worst. not OH GOOD! another woke ass white person. like when I see muh boys at TRS or such. I see a young woman and automatically get TRIGGERED.

but yeah it is true that women in This Particular Movement are a little weird. not necess an infiltrator, but just bandwagon jumpers and attention seekers.

but they are saying good things! if you blocked out her pretty body and face and just listened to her words, you would probably agree, yes right on. preach.

but thats just how TRIGGERED i get by qt young women. I see her and think DAMN I have never been with a woman that attractive. I haven’t Cuddled with a Young Woman in 11 years hahahaha.  I am a total INCEL hahaha.

maybe thats why i hate pretty young women. they remind me it has been 11 years since i even touched a woman. and she was a damn k1ke hahahah and a slut. I don’t hate her though. I just wish it were a nice white gurl, or that there had ever been a nice white gurl in the 11 years since, and that recently i fell in luv with a nice white gurl who I was closer to than any other woman, and it ended in the worst way than it had with any woman ever. hahaha. cool story bro.

ok going to go walk outside and listen to nile and 1488 dadcast hahaha.

neets and incels hahahaha.

yeah when you have no female friends you get really insecure about women, like I am so weird and women are so weird too.

well i know a couple women who are generally nice to me. they dont think im too weird. i see them once a week at my social thing. except we are not close though. they are both practically married and good for them since i am not particularly attracted to either one. i know i said the same thing about That Woman but…..yeah. these women are just not even CONCEIVABLY attractive to me, even if I WERENT hung up on somebody. When I first me That Woman, I said, yeah she’s fairly cute, I SHOULD BE more attracted to her, but I am too hung up on this other gurl. In no way am I close to saying I SHOULD BE more attracted to these other women I am acquainted with.  i just cant say that. they are way less attractive than her.

maybe my problem is I only go after ATTRACTIVE women. thats kind of LOOKIST isnt it?

i mean I am not super attractive!

but I like girls that are “ugly pretty” or kind of weird looking. This was easier to understand when I was younger. Now that I am old, young IS pretty, with no bullshit artificial qualifiers like “ugly pretty.”

anyway i am less mad at other women who dumped me because….we didnt really HAVE anything there. they barely knew me and I barely knew them. I was foolish and naive to get feelings so FAST, even if they were sluts for giving it up so fast.

this was different. when you know someone for 2.7 years, how can you just replace them, delete them so easily? you CANT. its a lot easier when you have only “known” the person for 3 months.

so yeah. thats muh beef. thats why im so butthurt. beause you just dont do this with someone youve really KNOWN for a LONG TIME.

love and friendship. what is this, whit stillman bringing back chloe sevingny and kate beckinsale who he did “the last days of disco” with. looks like it. A few years ago I would have gone to the movie theatre to see this. i mean I still should. chloe still looks good and whit is a good filmmaker. i was just more into him a few years ago. there is very few things I will go to a movie theatre for. Although I SHOULD go to the Budget Theatre. just get blazed and go there. I used to go all the time. Not getting blazed  however (though I should have.)

If Lars von Trier makes a nondegenerate movie I will go to the art theatre to see that. I saw Antichrist and Melancholia in the theatre but I did not go see nymphomaniac, I was starting to get really anti-degenerate by that time, and didn’t see why LVT had to go so far. well because thats what he DOES. he has a degen streak a MILE wide. kinda like gaspar noe.  i mean a nondegen filmmaker is hard to find, but those guys are just extreme.

i still think of myself as a Movie Buff even though I haven’t even WATCHED a movie in a year, and haven’t gone to the movie theatre in like two or three years. but around 2010, 2011, I was going to the movie theatre 2 times a WEEK. just see shitty movies just to DO something. it was something to DO.

well I guess now I am more diligent about Exercising, and that is BETTER than watching some degen shitty MOVIE.

heh. 461 calories under muh goal and I am STARVING. Had a big dinner, got right up to muh calorie goal, went for nice walk, burned 407 calories, now I am 461 and STARVING. about to go to bed. I guess it’s good to go to bed hungry. hahahaha.

reading all the negative reviews on glassdoor about post office jobs hahahaha. definitely more negative than positive hahaha. stories of people who worked 360 days straight hahahaha.  going months without a day off, being constantly Harrassed by managers for not working efficiently enough….even though you really cant work faster.

well i have some people in my family who work at the PO and they are very nice people. one I think is career and the other is probably PSE or casual. whats the difference?

heh. maybe I shouldnt have gone so whole hog with the post office. the reviews are generally negative. really negative. for pse’s. which is what I would be doing. either a pse cca or a pse mpc. mail processing clerk.