nov 27 wed
heh second day off in a row, starting to lose track of time. on muh thanksgiving vacation. ideally would do some chores today but it sez 14 degrees outside with wind chill.
had weird dream about i think she was Girl6. not really a weird dream, just a pretty normal dream, although she was giving me a hard time, and no action, cuddling, sitting on muh face, doggystyle, or otherwise. lesson here was she was treating me like a huge friendzone beta and complaining to me how some boy “totally legits me”, meaning totes creepy cray legit in luv with her, and she was maaad that she had to break his heart, why do boyz keep falling crazy in luv with me.
So I think I said something beta like I had become religious because I was praying so much for GOD to send me just one gurl who luved me. Although I said it in more of a grim way than a wah wah wah sort of way. still very beta. the alpha response would have been to say, “yep, i know that pain, all these grills are always in luv with me too, goin crazy & sh1t. I wish they just knew how to have fun without always falling in luv.” and then I would Kino her and bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang bang, and send her off to deal with the crazy boy, while I chillaxed poolside (or went to church), hahahaha.
dreamed I was in a College Dorm and people were depending on me to turn stuff in for them, put I still had 90000 stacked in a messy pile on my desk, shirking my responsibilities, and this time it would hurt other people too.
Anyway, always have college dreams, where I shirk and shirk, then things get out of control and I fail. not an unusual theme at all there.
then I was in The Urban Ghetto walking on the street in the middle of a sunny day, but I was still nervous I might be the victim of a robbery or kidnapping or Knockout Game by Urban Youths, in broad daylight. I saw two of them up ahead about one block and crossed the street. I was angry and scared that I “had to live” in such an unsafe neighborhood. Then I saw a big church coming up and stopped and looked at it to determine if it was my kind of church, and it was. Then I talked to a somewhat friendly nonviolent Old Man about becoming a New Member of the church.
And then I thought that was way better, ultimately, than being around Girl6, who despite having a Great 4ss that was so much fun to b4ng, she was a crazy and unpleasant person, and I’d much rather go to Church than hang out with her. But it was b4nging her fat young 4ss that was making things difficult for me, because THAT was more fun than going to Church. So I guess the solution is: bang her 4ss until I can’t no more, then kick her out and go to Church. Or simply announce I was Going To Church and that would be enough to scare her away.
Heh. It is kind of a disappointing feeling when you sort of want to J3rk Off, and then you try to think of a girl or girls, but none of them seems to be what you want. None of them is gonna get the job done. You could probably think about Girls1 thru 7, but that’s not recommended because of the Emotional Attachment. You just want a pretty young new girl. But all the girls you’ve seen recently aren’t doing it tonight. Yep, yer gonna have to fire up the computer and look at pr0n if you really want to j3rk off. then you decide that isn’t worth it, because you’re too tired, and probably just low libido right now anyway. that feel when, hahahahaha.
but overall the dream of girl6 stuck with me longer, was the bigger deal than not being able to think of a grill. I could have used girl6 to finish the job, but on principle that would be very bad, and I’m glad I did not.
Then I thought Yep I’m getting Way Too OLD for this sh1t, I will never have Feeeeeelings for a Grill ever again, there will never be a Girl8. If there were, she’d have to be super young (early twenties) and girls that age are not interested in Old Guys like me unless they have SUPER tight alpha game. Which I might have one day, but I’m still old and not quite there yet.
Then I thought, it’s really no big deal if there’s no Gurl8, I can live with that. But in that case, I would like to have a small Harem of 2 to 3 gurls ready to go at muh beck and call, for an unlimited supply of Sex for moi, at least, if not True Luv! Even 26 year olds, if they got a Great 4ss! Good Enough! Not PERFECT, Not IDEAL, but def GOOD ENOUGH, very live-with-able!!
Satisficing! And I’m not even lying. It would be NICE to have Gotten Married to Girls 4, 5, or 7 (Girls 1, 2, 3, and 6 were Bad Choices), but it’s merely a WANT and not a NEED, and, with sufficient Quality of Talent At my Beck and Call, I wouldn’t even think about that Want so much.
That is the lesson learned, and that’s the only reason I tell these embarrassing stories. to distill the Lesson Learned for You and Me.
That, and Religion/God is much more important than Young Tail.
That, and Girl6 is past her prime now in 2013. But when I first met her and fell in luv, she was in her prime. Wonder if I met her now, she would be just another past-her-prime grill that I say “nope not today” when trying to think of grills to j3rk-off to.
* Just discovered they have Apple Cider Vinegar Tablets. I am gonna try those and see how they work. But I’m not sure they’re “Organic” with the “Mother.” So does that mean it doesn’t work?
- Get Out in Front of It and Move the Goalposts (upfrommorallylazyloserness.wordpress.com)
- It’s Not Like I Wanted to Marry You, Baby (upfrommorallylazyloserness.wordpress.com)
- Online Mba Middle Class Bux (upfrommorallylazyloserness.wordpress.com)