mar 6

when you are in the depths of grief you do go crazy. this is well documented by scientists in SCIENCE! literature. and i dont believe its all a SCIENCE! atheist fedora jooish scam, i believe its real, and you do go crazy. meaning YOU do stupid shit, including possibly self destruct. i am scared that whenever i find myself in the depths of grief, i will do something so self destructive i will ruin my whole damn life. no, i dont mean K’ing myself, but something as “simple” as no call no showing and getting fired from your job. That’s another way of ruining your life besides just K’ing yourself. then you run out of money, lose your home, as you struggle to try to convince other people to hire you, as you are currently mad with grief and also look like a Quitter, Unreliable. or if you are a Recovering Addict, you lose control during the grief and fall off the wagon. leading you to quit your job and K yourself hahahaha. have a heart attack at the wheel and crash into a mcdonalds, like how a guy died around here not too long ago.

and then your wife leaves you for being such a basket case, takes the children, demands money you dont have, and you go to debtors prison because you cant afford to pay for your wife and kids, and even if your wife didnt demand alimony like a bitch, you probably still couldnt pay for your damn kids because you just lost your job because you no call no showed and couldnt think straight enough to do 1 * 1 = 1. let alone explain shit you dont understand and can’t refer your angry customers to someone who does understand. there might not even BE a person who understands.

came across a thing of a person talking about nietzsche and kierkegaard, and kinda broke it down into basics. because i’ve been MEANING to read “thus spoke zarathustra” the past…….13 years and havent made any progress. and i hear “either/or” is pretty good but meh its prob not fun. they explained the basic bitch version: that you face EXISTENTIAL DESPAIR, and go through STAGES: first, a very immature muh dick “aesthete” stage, then a more mature Ethical stage where you are aware of the despair, then Religiousness A where you try to do something about the despair, then finally Religiousness B, where you start to find some peace because you have given the despair over to GOD. I think. anyway I liked all the talk about DESPAIR, obviously hahahaha.

i am SUPER AWARE of despair, so i’ve obviously moved into at LEAST the “ethical” stage, so that’s good. uhhh i am DEF OPEN to the IDEA of a god, i would LIKE to have faith…. i dunno, i’m somewhere between ethical and religiousness A.

anyway these philosophers certainly were concerned with the things that really matter, but i couldnt spend my whole life writing books on these issues like they did. i mean just give me the basic bitch version, and thats good enough for me. then i’ll spend my life furiously mansplaining to women why murdering your baby is wrong, hahahahaha. thats good enough for me. why being a dirty slut is wrong. Why taking 100000000 cox is wrong. why The Jooed Life is wrong.  Why Jooish Perversions are Perverted.

i would be the Street Preacher while those guys were in their Ivory Tower hahahaha. They were still good goys though. GREAT goys. Both of them. i mean i do really need somebody to give me the basic bitch version though. nietzsche AND kierkegaard 4 Stupid Goyim.

but yeah no need for me to get a philosophy phd, even if its concentrating on ETHICS/MORALITY which would totally be my area, when its not complicated folks. you dont need a phd. just don’t murder your baby, dont cheat, dont treat people like garbage, do no harm. the end.

i dont need to spend my life researching that, i would prefer to spend my life mansplaining such retardedly basic bitch concept to BASIC BITCHES!!!!

you dont need a phd to understand these very BASIC BITCH, stage 1 concepts. it is interesting that kierkegard called the most basic bitch, instant gratification stage the “AESTHETE.” heh. does this mean they can at least appreciate aesthetics then? so its not like throwing pearls before swine at least? cuz thats what its like now. tell bitches that murdering their baby is evil and they look at you like youre speaking chinese hahahahaha.

i am magnifying again. i dont actually have proof of evil bitches like this. i dont have a concrete example where i mansplained the ethics of abortion to a woman and she had no idea. i am creating a fiction of the Worst Imaginable Woman here.  that is what i do in my FREE TIME.

i wonder what these TITANS of moral philosophy would say about ABORTION. they would probably faint in horror that such a thing could be conceived. no pun intended hahahahaha. and they would say I WONDER WHO could come up with an idea SO REPUGNANT to basic human morals?

i heard a theory that it was nietzsches sister who was responsible for all his “anti-semitic” writing, that she edited his notes to create “the will to power”, which did not represent FN’s actual ideas. i dont know how true this is. i would ideally like for FN to share some of his sister’s anti-semitism. talk to heidegger hahahahahahahaha.

but yeah basically we had all the same problems we had back then, but also some very new, very important moral problems, and you can probably go ahead and blame them on da joos right now. stuff like pornography, abortion, neetism, alienation.

i think some of the philosophers were starting to get into alienation. then in the 60s and 70s everything became postmodernism and relativism and (((((critical theory))))) and deconstructionism and frankfurt school and foucault and derrida and deleuze and lacan and barthes and baudrillard and adorno and other ways of making jooism excuses for jooish moral perversions and moral inversion.

give me nietzsche, kierkegaard, heidegger, and probably jung too hahahah. give me nonjooed philosophers only.

hey you dont like my antijooism, fook off back into the oven, jooboy. I have been antijoo since 2012 and its only gotten stronger hahahahahaha. I am da jooz worst nightmare. next to me, uncle adolf will seem like MICKEY MOUSE.

it’s not a CONSPIRACY. its right out in the fookin OPEN. its not a CONSPIRACY at all. joos have INTERESTS. all races but hwytes have INTERESTS. hwytes USED to have interests. joos interests have ALWAYS or nearly always been against hwytes, and until they stop that shit, my interests, and the interest of muh volk, will be against their interests.

you dont need to sell me on the JQ. i’m already there man. waaaaayyyyy ahead of you. i just wish i could sell more hwytes on the JQ. that is muh weak point, among others. but the horses that dont want to drink the water I lead them to will say, what, you mean you believe in a jooish global conspiracy that controls the media and the money? what else, you believe only 5 million people were ovened at auschwitz???? WHY WOULD YOU EVEN WANT TO QUESTION MUH 6 GORILLION? WHATS WRONG WITH YOU? WHY WOULD YOU EVEN DOUBT THAT NUMBER?


you dont like it, find some other neet blog that wants to help you get out of neetness. and if you’re a joo, go beg at the JCC for a 28k a year job and some jooish sluts. jooish doctors there can get you an unlimited supply of any drugs you want if you have anxiety and cant talk to gurls or something. who cares. go move to your own country and stop your people from jooing my country.

oh yeah i had a moral dilemma recently. i had this friend who was/is a great guy, one of the greatest goys i will ever meet, just a perfect man. the kicker is that his life was very literally saved by a jooish doctor. WAT DO.

so i say, NAJALT, there are probably lots of jooish doctors that save lots of goy people’s lives. BUT THEIR LIVES WOULD HAVE BEEN SAVED ANYWAY by goy doctors were there no jooish doctors available. if that jooish doctor wasnt there, a goy doctor would have been in his place to save muh old friend’s life. not saying that particular joo isn’t a good person tho. he probably is. not a great race, however.

simple answer amirite? fook yes. i only took ONE philosophy course and I knew the answer to that one right away. meanwhile joos with philosophy phd’s spend their careers brainwashing CHILDREN that MURDER is morally acceptable, that EVERYTHING is morally acceptable because MORALITY does not really exist, its just a system of hwyte oppression and punching down. this is what philosophy has DEGENERATED into.

better to just take Ancient Greek Philosophy with Plato and Aristotle and shit at some shit tier toilet college. or i guess just anything before 1900. everything to around the time of freud and marx, except excluding their jooish bullshit.  maybe studying  how they were the beginning of jooish bullshit. defoo da joo.

hegel? kant? how jooed were they?

wasnt the enlightenment pretty jooed?

these are not questions you can ask your professors. your TEACHERS.

i will probably never be able to be man enough to have children of my own. i just ask for the opportunity to help hwyte children in some way, and to i guess be AROUND them in some capacity, like i am not automatically such a bad influence that I need to be KEPT AWAY from children AT ALL COSTS. that would indeed make me quite a sad panda hahahahahahahaha.

so why not help children who are RELATED to me? like the children of cousins and such, kids who are 10 years old and actively in the process of Child Development.

well they have good successful white parents and I am SURE the children will do well. they dont need my help. in fact, they are surrounded by so much good influence i might actually be a bad influence. also i am not close with these parts of the family, and have never even MET the children, in some cases who are like 12 years old. never met them in 12 years.

also, i would be a better influence to somebody who is surrounded by a lot of bad influences hahahaha. then my paltry contribution might seem more positive in comparison hahahaha.

my friends and old friends who have had children, well lets just say these children are blessed to have good hwyte parents. i am not worried about those kids. i mean yeah i should still be in contact with my old friends but. no excuse. maybe i felt i would be a bad influence on their children! because I was a fookin bum who was not alpha male enough to have children!

so this kind of mindset keeps ME away from GOOD influences and also from spending time with hwyte children, which itself is technically a good influence too, even though the children arent doing any hard work. heavy lifting hahahaha. they dont need to tho. they just need to exist.

i mean a person doesnt have to be PERFECT. i would probably hang out with a loser like me just because i have interesting ideas and are not actively K’ing myself with drugs or alcohol hahahaha. that’s pretty much all you need to do. don’t need to make 28k a year, just need to not be a hopeless drug or alcohol addict. IVE ALREADY ACHIEVED THAT MUCH!!!!!!

i mean i would have a grand old time talking to myself about how sluts are shamefully degenerate, smokin 420000000 tonnes of MMJ, watching triumph of the will, going to the park, talking about the 14 words and the JQ, listen to iron maiden and black metal, hahahahaha.

maybe i want the female version of myself?

heh. in a way i felt That Woman was the closest i had found to a Female Version Of Myself. just cuz i felt we were SIMILAR people, similar values, similar Mindset, similar personalities. we werent the SAME, but we WERE SIMILAR.

not similar enough i guess!!!!!!!!

had decent day at the job, answered phone a little bit, did something i felt just competent enough at so that it felt like a Surmountable Challenge, and not an Insurmountable Confusing Clusterfook. i mean thats a razors edge, when does something tip over from being surmountable to being INsurmountable? i mean i would much rather something be too easy than too hard. because you can ACTUALLY DO the thing that is too easy. the thing that is too hard, you dont have a DAMN CHANCE of even KNOWING if you’re EVEN CLOSE to the right PATH or not.  no thank you.  you could be 99% there, or you could be 180 off the mark, and you have no way of knowing. FOOK THAT SHIT.

mar 7

now i am putting EVERYTHING in a spreadsheet to try to get AVERAGES. not a bad way. average minutes to apply for  job. average calories per day. average time i went to bed. average (estimated) time i actually fell asleep. those last two items are my latest great idea. so i can OPTIMIZE my bedtime. obv the goal is not to get into bed too early, and close the window between bed and sleep to about 30 minutes. and still get 8 hours a night. since i get up at 5 am, the goal fall asleep time is then 9 pm. easier said than done. but maybe the numbers can help me there.

measure the metrics. analyze the analytics hahahahahahaha. get 8 hours of sleep a night, lose 45 pounds, hahahaha.

no i mean i have already lost 45 pounds TOOT TOOT. i dont want to lose any more, just to keep it off, so i dont get too big for muh nice new smaller clothes.

heard a story of a man who took well over 60 college credits in one year because he went to an online college and was charged by the year, not by the credit hour, so he wanted to cram as many credits into the year as possible. also, he was probably required to have bachelors degree to get the job or promotion. so he took WELL over 60 credits at this shitty online university in one year. and im sure worked full time during that time as well. we all wondered, well did he actually learn anything, and agreed, probably not, but this is the shitty situation you have to deal with. he needed the degree and he just wanted to Git R Done, and he did. at the least expense to himself. you cant blame him.

The System shouldnt have REQUIRED him to have a bullshit degree from a bullshit online school, or really ANY skool. CREDENTIALISM at its worst.

so now he makes a good living with a BS degree and prob has several children. hwyte guy hahahaha.

im not saying he’s dumb or jooish. im saying the whole system is a dumb and jooish scam wasting years of his life when he should have been making more money for his hwyte children instead of slaving away for 60 credits in 1 year just to get the piece of paper which would help his children. i dont even know where people get the high energy. maybe the children do it for you hahahaha. maybe i should have children just to try to get more energy hahaha.

cancer is the worst thing ever. you can beat cancer, then 30 years later, you get a tumor, you get a savage round of chemo, which is painful and wrecks you, its ALMOST as bad as the cancer, then it turns out, welp, the chemo didnt work, and now you are gonna DIE in 6 months. 6 months you go from pretty healthy for your age, to DEAD, with the last few weeks being horrible pain. like welp, you’re obviously GOING TO DIE in the next week or two at the longest. god damn. it makes having a heart attack look fast and painless.

alzheimers is also horrifying and prob worse than a heart attack.

there are very few ways to die that are NOT absolutely TERRIFYING. cancer, alzheimers, etc. dying peacefully in your sleep really IS too much to ask for. which is why i am Bitter at The Lord for prohibiting su1c1de. in the face of cancer and alzheimers, su1c1de looks FOOKING AWESOME. but you CANT do it, because then you go to HELL. GOD DAMN.

there’s nothing INHERENTLY wrong with online college. i know for a fact there are strict, good quality standards, for those that choose to apply them. i just dont like shady, scammy jooish online colleges that charge an arm and a leg and are clearly run as low-quality business to Produce Credentials. Expensive Degree Mills. but fookin Wichita State University Online, nothing wrong with that. also the shorter online classes are HARD. you cover a LOT of stuff in 8 work pack weeks. I would much rather see 16 week courses at least. and schools that charge by the credit hour rather than the year. because i would only want to take 1 class at a time, ever, and have it be a 16 week class, and have it meet accepted quality standards, and be a fair price. in this case, online college is no problem mon.  but phoenix and devry can SUCK MUH DICK.

40 years ago your dad could put himself through college bagging groceries at the grocery store. being a damn caddy. mowing lawns during the summer and not needing to win highly competitive internships during the summers.  now you have to take out a huge jooish loan thats worse than a HOME LOAN, for something that has LESS value than it did 40 years ago.

and then youre screwed because you didnt get an internship at microsoft when you were 19.

but im clearly MAGNIFYING. PLENTY of people are hugely successful who did not get internships at microsoft at 19. people have gotten out of PRISON at age 25 and still turned their lives around. (but thats sure not the norm for people who get out of prison at 25. MOST of them just go right back. because they cant get legit work that pays more than n3gro CRIME.)

maybe i should just buy and resell drvgs on black markets hahahahahaha. buy low, sell high hahahahaha. no im not advocating this whatsoever. i condemn all illegal things. OBEY THE LAW.