DONT BEG FOR AN APOLOGY

1205

moon man, killin ni99ers and securing the existence of our people and a future for our children hahahaha

that feel when you go to a family restaurant and see a 22 year old white gurl with a 1 year old white baby, and a young black semi thug looking guy hahahaha. little white baby grows up watching their mother becoming a mudshark hahahaha.

so im insecure racist because i dont like white women fooking nonwhite men. is this SO BAD on my part? i dont like them fooking nonwhite men, and i like them having nonwhite babies even LESS.

so she got her heart broken, and she wants to break HIS heart. makes sense. but she CANT because he doesnt love her.

i got my heart broken by her, i want to break HER heart, but i CANT, because she doesnt love me.

see how this works? she just needed to break the heart of SOMEONE, and in order to do that, they gotta have feelings for you. i was there with my feelings, it was very annoying to her, AND she needed a heart to break.

WELL, i would never do that. i dont want to break anyone elses heart but HERS!

i was thinking i could pay a charming man with herpes to bang her and give her herpes. then i got sad because that would mean she is a slut who would unprotected bang any charming player. and that some alpha men essential have sexual CHOICE, much like women, because they are THAT desirable to wmen.

south korea looks weird on google maps. why is that. i want an explanation. i mean you cant click on stuff and it just looks weird with the place names and text of streets and states and cities and such compared to the neighboring countries. why is that. i want an explanation. and it looks fuzzy and low resolution.

http://ogleearth.com/2012/07/constraining-online-maps-the-case-of-south-korea/

uhh the govt of south korea i guess is why hahahaha

http://map.naver.com/

you can get more on naver which is the korean “google” ie the google competitor

anyway i feel completely incompetent, like i cant do ANY job.

If you have any questions, figure it out on your own, cuz if you have to ask someone for help…..YOUR FIRED.

you will be fired by someone who thinks YOUR is the appropriate spelling there hahaha.

Albania is essentially a non european country IN europe. and countries like UK, france, and germany are becoming more non european. but i wonder, is there lots of muslim terrorism in albania? is albania a de facto islamic state? sharia law? connections to isis? why is there not more islamic terrorism in the nonmuslim european countries surrounding albania, ie serbia, montenegro, greece, macedonia? and kosovo is basically albania 2 right?

”  According to 2011 census, 58.79% of Albania adheres to Islam, making it the largest religion in the country. The majority of Albanian Muslims are secular Sunni with a significant Bektashi Shia minority. Christianity is practiced by 16.99% of the population, making it the 2nd largest religion in the country.
Religion in Albania – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion_in_Albania  Wikipedia  ”

i thought sunni was what isis was. what the heck is a secular sunni.

http://history.stackexchange.com/questions/12554/why-were-albanians-the-only-nation-in-the-balkans-who-converted-to-islam-during

its kinda like having a falling out with a very good friend. only instead of being stubbornly mad at them entirely, you’re also sad and begging them to come back. they are more sutbbornly mad than you are, althgouh you gradually come to hate them for being so stubborn and not giving you a damn CHANCE.

do you feel like you havent been given a fair chance?

yes yes i do hahaha. i was not given a fair shake.

google racist composers other than wagner hahahahahaha

everyone hates wagner so much. hahahah.

today i learned that my boy mikko aspa is also in a nationalistic RAC type band which is very pro finnish and name translates to “cross of liberty” and he wears suspenders!!!! in other words this might be his most “racist” and definitely Political thing yet!!!!!!!!

i think this is great, totally awesome, because he of course “flirts with fascism” but its kinda hard to understand what he’s saying sometimes. literally and figuratively hahahaha. plus i think his power electronics celebrates degeneracy and nihilism. however, an interest in Blood And Soil is anything but degenerate and nihilistic, and imho makes mikko even kewler! finland for the finns i say!!!!

http://sarastuslehti%5Bdot%5Dcom/2015/10/28/mikko-aspan-haastattelu/

you can get a horrible english google translation hahaha.

oh this is great. oh god bless you mikko. he’s always been one of my favorites, but i never liked that degeneracy and nihilism he was/is involved in, he’s better than that. i hope he gets more publicly and proudly political in the future! and this band plays shows in finland and gets the crybabies in the media crying about it!

probably because The MIgrant Crisis is big in finland now, as it is everywhere in the world. this could be the moment The West rises up to defend itself and throw out its invaders once and or all………or be cucked by marxist traitors once and for all. you know what side mikko and me are on!

really i would like for him to have kids and turn away from Nihilism forever. and this nationalist group is a step in the right direction!

look for the picture of him with a mustache and suspenders hahahaha oh thats so good.

stuff like that keeps me going when my heart is broken, when decent women do horrible things to me. itd be one thing if she were a horrible degen. then this would be par for the course. but this will probably be one of the worst things shes done in her life. she just needed to break someones heart after getting hers broken, then after she does that, she can go back to being a decent peron. done and done. and noone will ever believe she could do someting like that.

well i still want her to get her heart broken again as karma for what she did to me.

theres not alot in english about the band but videos have started popping up on youtube, they have facebook page, etc.

anyway it would be easier if she were a total piece of shit, so i could write her off and say have a shitty life, piece of shit. but she will continue to be the moral and decent woman i fell in luv with…..she was just a piece of shit to me becuase of circumstances. because she needed somebody to be shitty to and i was in the right )(wrong) place at the right time!

why are white women so Racially Suicidal? why do they seem to prefer nonwhite men over white men? because nonwhite men are more masculine? i can understand that. just like SOME white men prefer asian women because asian women are more feminine than white women.

but i say to white women, give white men a damn CHANCE. there are plenty of masculine white men. also,fatherless ghetto matriarchy thuggishness and barbarism is not true masculinity, ya damn morons. these women need damn strong fathers to phsyically restrain them from fooking nonwhite thugs. sad but true.

but once you get a few white babies from these white women, that usually sets them right, and they dont need to be restrained by their fathers and husbands any more. you can begin to trust them in other words! well, sometimes but not always. certainly some white women with white children have abandoned their families to have wild fun with tyrone.

that is the name of the group hahahaha. he actually plays shows with them and gets photographed. BALLSY!!!

shit. anyway she was one of the most positive people in my life and now shes gone forever, after treating me like shit. i always liked her as a friend, but then i gradually liked her more and more and more and more and by 2 years into it, i was in luv with her. seriously. it didnt happen overnight hahaha.

i wanted to Fight For what we had, i didnt want to give it up without a fight, i wanted us to argue, to argue would show she had some emotion about it. well she was either too mad or not mad enough to argue with me.

but yeah she had become my inspiration, my motivation, my muse. she was one of the most important, most beloved people in my life and now she is gone. and to be gone in that way. all at once, completely. its like theyre dead because one moment theyre there, the next theyre not, and you can remember the last day/time you talked. but shes not dead! she just chose to throw me away and never ever talk to me again, and not respond to my desperate begging for communication! my favorite person! and now my life is in ruins!

i will always have my right wing reactionary stuff to sustain me…….but she was much more powerful of a sustainer! she made luv come out of my heart!!!!!!!! very few people can do that!

i can understand why a person could do this, i just thought she was a better person than that.

break my heart to get revenge on someone else. hurt me because someone else hurt her and she couldnt hurt them back. shit. i would rather she stalked him, terrorized him, got it out of her system. did she desperately beg him to come back? i dont know. i thought she rightfully called it off angrily after she found out he was cheating.

she could have just stayed with him and begged him to stop cheating. or he could have cheated, then dumped her, then her beg him to take her back and shes ok with sharing him. these are all desperate things i would have done hahahaha.

also, how could she fall so deeply in luv so soon after her main LTR ended? thats shady imho and stupid. i knew she knew this guy beforehand but. how long? did she always have a crush on him or something? what was the process and timeline of her falling in luv with him? did she REALLY luv him or just THINK she luved him? did she just THINK she DIDNT luv me? i didnt trust her judgement in matters of feelings and rels in other words. maybe its because she didnt have a father.

she didnt really luv him! she doesnt know what she wants! deep down she’ll discover she really wants ME! but she just doesnt know it yet! so i have to keep pursueing her!

yeah you can see that is ridiculous. i deserve a woman who ACTUALLY KNOWS if she wants to be with me or not. not some mudshark who is horrible at relationships.

hehehehe i should start a RAC band hahahaha with some other hwite men

1206

came close to clicking on her youtube channel today, which i dont always remember she has, as i ws going thru my youtube view history. which has everything ive ever watched on youtube..for years. since before i met her hahahaa. i just cleared all view and search history.

heh. i mean i could just look up her damn channel right now! im not blocked or anything. but i have to stay strong. not TAINT muh new view and saerch histroy hahaha.

come on. just apologize to me. have your new alpha successful boifran apologize to me for you! maybe i should contact her and beg for an apology because an apology would be such great Closure.

it would kind of be good closure…..but id still want her.

would it be WORTH IT? why dont i just DO IT and get it out of my system? she probably wouldnt respond anyway.

she had all the power. she wanted me out of her life. she dumped me. she ignored me. she ignored my last attempt to beg for a response. i have gone like 110 days with NIC.

111 days ackshully. made a google spreadsheet where it calculates the exact days, day by day. and 145 days since The End. shit thats 34 days in between. you think she could have cooled down enough to respond after 35 days.

you just do =today()-a5 whatever, where a5 = 1/1/2015 or whatever the desired DDAY was.

dont forget your index and count and match functions hahahaha

if she wanted to contact me and apologize, she would.

if she wanted to have someone else contact me and apologize because she was too afraid, she would.

IVE BEGGED ENOUGH.

when you want an apology, its not your role to BEG for it. maybe if i were still on speaking terms with her, i could ASK for it. “I would like an apology please and thank you.”

but were not on speaking terms!

and its CERTANLY not my role to BEG her to get on speaking terms with her, so i then BEG her for an apology!

but i will see a PERFECT 10 20 year old gurl and still want That Person MORE. cuz it takes a long time for Luv to die.  I have to mansplain this to who think secs is just secs, a fetus is just a parasite, who dont understand luv and monogamy and loyalty, who think oxytocin is a patriarchal myth to force women to stay with men who abuse them.

watched ridiculous episode of drugs inc where the subject was KROKODIL, and some of the people were just pathetic, like this 80 pound woman where you could actually see most of the fookin bone in her arm. the flesh had just rotted away entirely leaving a good 6 to 8 inches of plain old BONE visible. they never explained why a simply opiate could rot your flesh. i guess because it was mixed with Gasoline and Red Phosphorous. and thats what does it. but it is basically made from codeine, then cooked. and is supposedly stronger and cheaper than heroin.

then they had a camera person in tbilisi georgia which i thought was neat cuz im not really sure what georgian people look like. and i am interested in weird countries like that. i could not tell if they were speakin georgian or russian.

also most of the people had their faces blocked out.

i encourage all single or nonmonogamous or “available” women to be celibate for a year hahahaha. or to only have secs with a man once you know him well enough to discern whether he is a man of substance or not. hint hes probably not if you are on the chad carousel banging tons of guys and feeeeeeeeeeeeeling cray cray, ya dumb whore hahahaha. close your legs, get to know your secs partners before taking another koch and adding to your number yet again.

maybe i should have someone I know contact her for me hahahahahaha

well i dont want anyone in my family to, or any of my friends, also i am distancing from all my few friends, in a way she was one of my closest friends. i felt that way, but she didnt obviously.

she has more people she could ask to contact me hehehehe. i could ask my shrink hahahaha. i might actually. i mean i dont know how women work, well i know what Red Pill types same, that they are hypergamous whores who response only to Raw Power and Dominance. So I could contact her and COMMAND her hahahahaha. establish FRAME hahahaha.

but i honestly never met a woman like her before and i worry i never will again. she actually seemed like a normal decent person and not a bitchy crazy slut hahahaha. so i connected with her on a very human level as opposed to just an attractive ass to fook hahahaha.

ok the georgian language is a kartvelian language which is NOT an indo european language. but a caucasian language. but armenian IS an indo european language.

and they are both Caucasian Ethnic groups. but azeris are turkic! and iranians are iranian hahahaha.

so i know stalin was a georgian. ok georgians are mainly orthodox christian. and less than 10% of georgians speak russian. so those georgirans in the krokodil show prob were speaking georgian.

Stalin said, “This creature softened my heart of stone. She died and with her died my last warm feelings for humanity.”

is what stalin said when his first wife died. he was in superluv with her kinda like i was in luv with That Person. except That Person never luved me or married me or had a babby with me or died tragically young.

are georgians white. shit theyre probably whiter than albanians.

google image search georgian women. great. some look white, some do not hahahaha. they all have dark hair. some have lighter eyes. i would totes bang the more white looking ones.

theyre caucasian but theyre not totally europid hahahaha. just like the finns. hahahahaha no im kidding, finns ahve got to be whiter than georgians.

i might have a mixed race georgian baby with a beautiful, pure, young, virtuous georgian gurl hahahaha, one who looked more white than nonwhite hahahaha.

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