dec 14

back from church.

always have deep thoughts on sundays. i was thinking how i was always angry. life did not suck in general because i have a good family and basic needs taken care of, BUT: skool always sucked, work always sucked, unemployment always sucked, women always sucked, and i didn’t think there was anything i could do to change that suckiness. you could go to a diff skool, diff job, diff period of unemploy, diff woman, get older, but things would still suck in their own special ways.

not all women are like that, but all the women i have tried to be intimate with have done things like that

well then you’re picking the wrong women, right?

not necessarily, some truly sucked, and some were truly good people, but it still sucked being rejected by them regardless.

spending the night with a woman was a big deal for me. a game changer. i only did it about 4 times and the last time was 9.5 years ago. 95 years ago hahahahaha.

then i thought about how woman8 spent like 4 years with a boifran, and spent every night with him, therefore she has spent 1500 nights with a lover, vs my 4, and she has like 350 times more experience spending the night with a lover.

when 2 or 3 times something, is considered an “ORDER OF MAGNITUDE.”

well, what when the difference between you and normalfags is Orders of Magnitude TO THE POWER OF MOAR ORDERZ OF MAGNITUDE???!?!?!?!?!

it’s like night and day, almost like youre a different species of person right?

oh women are human BEINGS alright, they just are a generally worse kind of human being than men!!!!!

and so then i thought about how i have a LOT of ANGER, ALWAYS a LOT of ANGER, which sometimes i forget about, like if i’m freaking out over my job.

and before i starting like liking woman8, it was a very peaceful, not-so-angry period where i didn’t like ANYBODY. I had gotten over woman7 and simply didn’t like anybody. this peaceful period lasted…..i dunno, let’s just say 1 year. cuz it took me like 1 year at least to get over Woman7.

the good news is, that i am learning from the mistakes there, namely: don’t be a weak coward who is afraid to make a move, so you waste three years of your life on a grill.

so far i have only “wasted” 2 and a half MONTHS on woman8, and they haven’t really been wasted at all. in fact, right now, my best move is to be distant, so i can give her time and space to get over this guy, and then i can step it up in like a month or so. but since i am hot blooded right now, that’s challenging.

women women women women, strategery to date women, SAME AS IT EVER WAS.

HARRIBLE, just HARRIBLE. being so ANGERY all the time.

also, going to a hooker is a GOOD, SMART idea and i recommend it, IF it weren’t against the law.

because having sechs WILL make you more confident, which WILL make you more successful with the women you actually DO want.

and the hookers JOB is to make you feel comfortable. heck just TELL her you haven’t had sechs in two years, so, uh, please keep that in mind and just halp me out here, f00k, i mean it’s not like im not paying you $300, this is your job.

and i’m pretty sure they would be “gentle” and say encouraging things to you, and afterward, you would feel LIKE A BOSS, and then you could use that confidence to pull the women you really do want. Like your Female Friend, WOman # 8 hahahaha.

a lot of this i am “stealing” from my daily Talks, my voice recordings. they are great things which produce a lot of great ideas. you should do this too. unfort i can’t publish them anywhere because my voice identifies me. but i may well pass them down to my 3 chirren.

but yeah being a loser for many years will make you very angry and disappointed.


and you choose it whether or not you realize you’re choosing it. hehehehe.

get a fitness ball right now. it costs like 20 or 30 dollars. go into debt to get one, put it on your credit card. it is one of the best things you can have, and its not THAT expensive. just dont go out the BAR one night and buy a fitness ball.

yes. how success with wimmin affects your success in WERK, and vice versa. it is a snowballing, synergy, momentum type thang. an upward or a downward spiral.

do NOT use backpage to find escorts. damn.

shaved part of beard. shaved sides of beard to level 3 and left chin area long. this is kinda my classic look now. then i will shave the rest before thursday interview.

uh if yer google chrome is taking forever to load, maybe just try uninstalling it (programs and features) and then reinstalling it. make sure you save your bookmarks.

gilmartin brings up an interesting point: having a gurlfran is VERY important to love-shys, and they THINK about women ALL THE TIME, yet they never have a gurlfran or any success with women, thus their Real Self versus their Ideal Self is a Huge Huge Huge Huge difference. And because they spend so much time thinking about women and never getting them, this hinders them making friends with other MEN because they seem so out of it or distracted or self centered or weird.

And also to be popular with women, a man must be popular with MEN first. shy man syndrome, book of the year 2014 hahaha.