apr 30

well a lot more chill today regarding that phone call. no need to turn the phone off in fear. fully prepared for the phone call to wake me up, and then to pretend being awake. heck i might even go for a powerwalk rather than wait nervously by the phone like I did the past couple days.

obviously you and me wrestle with the relevance and or truth of the Catholic Church. Being an Atheist is gay as f00k, that’s out of the question. So then I was thinking maybe “orthodox” might be a good thing to look into. i think it’s actually called orthodox catholicism. they do not follow the pope or rome and instead have their patriarch or whatever, and usu have black robes and huge beards and have big following in greece and russia. and are regarded as way less wimpy or leftist than post vatican 2 catholic church. at the very least they are interesting.

virgin = simply a beta male who has enough pride in himself to have standards for the women he wants to bnag, ie, will not settle for table scraps, hambeasts, single momz, gutter wh0res. 80% of men are beta males, the vast majority. Virginity is the natural state for beta males, so DON’T WORRY ABOUT IT, it’s better to be a beta virgin, than to be so desperate not to be a beta virgin, than you get sucked into some hambeast or lunatic, next thing you know, you’ll be marrying them. NO. better to be a true virgin!

and no one even needs to know if you don’t want them to! It’s none of their damn business! who deserves the truth about yourself? well just your true friends and family! people that have a track record of Standing Up For You! Your Activists! hehehe.

heh. Once you become PROUD enough of being your Bad Beta Self, then you Achieve Alpha. hehehe.

yeah that’s some sloganeering. It’s not necessarily per se being Proud of Your Beta Weakness, it’s more like saying, I’m Beta And I’m Proud, So WHAT If I’m Beta, so are 80% of men, I Yam What I Yam, so don’t give me sh1t b1tch or I will bury you. And basically standing up for yourself, being proud of YOURSELF like this, is what Makes an Alpha. Having Strong, Real Pride in your SELF.

what is the best thing to wh4ck off to? Porn? your imagination? Not sure. what I DO know for a FACT is, it’s NOT gurls you know where you have had Net Negative times with them, or regrets, or butthurt, or rejection.

But sometimes it CAN be Empowering to wh4ck off thinking of Real Life Grills you want to bang, if you’re not too close to them, haven’t been rejected by them, etc. Sometimes preferable to some wh0re in a porno.

maybe try doing this earlier in the day, supposedly men have more testosterone earlier in the day and have higher libido, but at the end of the day they are too tired to f00k even. so uh maybe in the shower before work, hahahaha.

if a man is a beta and is having S with an attractive wimmin, you can be CERTAIN he is paying a HIGH price, or will soon: she is absolutely insane (borderline/sociopath/cluster b) or will f00k him with a babby or fake rape scam, or will break his heart causing him to go cray. there is ALWAYS a price for Sex for Betas. ALWAYS.

well the company did not call today. good riddance i say, hehehe. but shouldn’t i be showing more interest in them? yes, but I was never gungho about the job anyway. i just called them out of mild curiosity, just to practice an interview. but i don’t really want to learn a new job right now. I don’t really want to drive twice as far.

now, if my current job screws me and doesn’t call me back EVER, then…. then its time.

and then what do I do when people ask about the “gap”? well you say for the first x weeks of that I thought I was going back. was told I would be, then was given bad news. buuuuut all the while I was  studying for muh certs in microsoft, not playing poker, blogging, watching tv, and napping. hehehe.

because they always ask about The Gap. And I’m not talking about the stupid Thigh Gap that all the Wimmin are squawking about in 2014.  that just means your thighs are too damn skinny and bony. or not. i guess some naturally petite slender women might have a natural Thigh Gap. But I really don’t care, as a man, about it. i can’t even say how many of muh numbered girls 1 thru 7 have had it. maybe, maybe not. i would assume maybe the skinnier ones may have, but I Loved Gurls who had Meat On Their Bones too.

whoooops forgot to take a shower today. well, i do take a shower when i am going to work.