march 28

well my new gambling strategy is to bet by .20 chips (big blind is .10)  rather than bet half the pot, especially if betting half the pot is liable to scare people away, and i would like to make SOME money off a decent hand and a decent flop, make like .10 an hour after paying the blinds, hehehehe.

that is another bad feel, that your best is never good enough, that your best is worse than their WORST, that your best is worse than Bare Minimum For Surviving In Life. Of course your Best is compromised by your no energy and your unwillingness to try and work hard, and by half-4ssing everything, hehehehe.

getting a Young QT to have S with you as positive reinforcement every time you Try to Work Hard WOULD be an IDEAL motivator, but obviously hard to Win/Earn that Motivator, being a Fat Old Lazy Loser Omega Male! Well no sh1t, a young QT having S with you would SOLVE EVERYTHING!!!! hehehehe.

Gregorian chant is very calming and relaxing, even moreso than Classical Music. Any kind of unaccompanied church chant. I am also looking to get into Russian Orthodox Church Chants. Similar but the language is “old church slavonic” or russian, not latin, and I like to think it is “darker” somehow. heh.

i am in a real r9k/v9k sort of feel, but I REFUSE to look at those websites. instead I will listen to Chantz, play Two Tables of Poker, try to make some money this hour. I have started to identify Frequent Mistakes that are losing me money. I can beat these f4gg0ts, hehehehe.

gun control gun control more guns more guns dem gummint and socialists and muzzies and obummer cant pry mah gunz outta mah cold dead hands hehehehe. no I love guns and fully support the second amendment and think gun control types are the stupidest weakest lamest f4gg0ts who can take their f4gg0ts phds and shove them up their middle class f4g 4sses. f00k middle class leftist f4gg0ts who hate gunz. although not all middle class are leftists, there are plenty of middle class rightists as well. and those successful f4gg0ts can s my d and gimme a J, hahahahaha.

like the crazy autists who shoot up skools are getting their guns through legal means, or not carefully preselecting gun free zones to do their shootings.

and maybe they just wanted to pwn some f4gg0tz, hahahahahaha. oh they pwnt them allright!

the entire purpose of Education Itself should be like Boot Camp preparing you for the War of Work. F00k theory and book learning. Moar INterviews and INternships and stuff like that should be built in, day to day work and communicating with f4gg0ts. stuff you will actually be doing On The Job.

And even if you get a C GPA in a Useful STEM degree, that should be enough to get you a job. or how about, the skool doesn’t even LET you graduate UNTIL you find a Job! Homeschool Univ Of UFMLL would do that.

should you marry and have children with a woman you get along with, but are not S’ually Attracted to at all? Maybe, if you get along REALLY WELL, she shares your rightist homeschool values, AND she lets you bang young cuties on the side. just make sure she knows that.

so then should she be allowed to bang big strapping alpha men on the side? no. men and women are very different.

Get another wife to keep the first wife in line. Amazing the trouble you have to go thru to have a mother for your children. but that is the ultimate benefit, and the main reason to dealing with women.

but isn’t it better to be a single dad and have No Mother to your children, than a Bad Mother of your Children. Yes, Absolutely! But Ideally you would have a Good MOther Of your Children.

So if a woman starts out good, but goes bad, kick her the f out!! easy solution.

media keeps saying that physical therapy is a great career that you only need an associates degree for, however i’ve seen rumblings from the associates degree people that you really need a bachelors degree or higher. and of course doctorate would be ideal. i will never understand people who get doctorates. which is unfortunate, i wish i COULD get a doctorate, then I would have a lot easier time getting a decent job, and indeed I’ve had lots of contact with The Middle Class, and people who ARE getting/gotten doctorates, which made me think it was The Ideal Way for me to go to, but I hate f00king college and skool and reading and papers and tuition and etc. just not worth the cost.

what, getting a Good Job is not worth the cost? that should be worth ANY cost!

then I bring up my excuse of, well, I’m obviously just not a College MInded person: I hate studying, I hate the concept of college, I hate college, etc, so obviously MOAR COLLEGE is the obvious wrong idea for a COLLEGE HATER like me.

So do I find a way to Quash Muh Irrational Phobia Of College…….or do I find another way?

I have wasted like 10 years trying to find another way!

but I have been half-4ssing on that. I also took some college in that time, but that was half-4ssed as well. I half-4ss EVERYTHING EVER, THAT is the main problem. so how to fix THAT?

By not half-assing stuff any more! Pick a thing and complete it without half-assing!