jan 10 2014 FRIDAY 10:21pm
wow. made it thru hell week #1. got 2 days off. wow. last weekend SUCKED because I was WORRIED SICK the whole time, except for friday night, the longest possible time before Moar Work. And now it’s that time again. just partying by listening to Chill Jazz and Writing, hehehe. drinking coffee at 10pm just to prolong this, but still super tired. might even only be able to manage 1 post hehe.
well i’ve gotten a lot better but I still don’t like it. I am starting to get into the groove but it’s just Too Damn Busy. I am Faking the Confidence better and Better, THANK GOD.
yep. really tired. looking forward to going for a huge long brisk powerwalk tomorrow. making my talking mp3 file. If I keep getting better at my new job, and stop freaking out about it, I might even not be so desperate to find a new one. But DEF want to find a new one by Dec 2014 at the latest.
really can’t believe I made it. you know who I thank for helping me thru.
wow this is weird, I thought I’d be typing like a madman and write another 5 posts in one night like I did last friday, but my GOD. not so much. just want to relax, and I actually might even be ABLE to!!!
when it’s not busy, it’s not so bad. starting about 7pm it is pretty good. but before that, not so much.
Heh. Just want to be a FT Maintenance Man with a Union and 401k, do that till I’m 75 and they have to carry me out, be a permanent bachelor, master Game and bang the women of my choosing, by the time I’m 50, select a good mother of my children and have 3 children, actually prob would be best to have 3 children by 3 different mothers, and my sweet FT Union Maintence Job would be enough to support muh Kids, homeschool them and teach them how to win and have 3 children of their own each someday, have them go to trade school and make money, or stemgineering and make money.
tried watching this movie I started out, couldn’t last an hour, turned it off at 12:20am and crashed. woke up at 9:30 am or so.
unfort had a dream about Girl7. Darn. It was a pretty powerful dream, but thank GOD it hasn’t ruined my day. Innit, she was standing before me wearing only underwear that were normal sized and not super slutty; and her beautiful breasts we exposed, and she looked very scared and nervous, like this was the first time she was doing this. I was touching her skin firmly but gently and kneeling before her Crotch to slowly pull down her underwear and she was gasping as I did so, to slooooooowly reveal her Bush and Genitalia and Buttocks and Oh LORD. hehehe I will never know that feel. As for her, she is possibly a Lesbian or Asexual, not even joking, 50% chance of one of those two. If she actually IS Heterosexual, she has a very low Sex Drive and does not like any kind of Physical Contact whatsoever: Sex, Weird Sex, Making Out, Cuddling, Hand Holding, Hugging, Kissing. Nope. None of it.
so I was productive and went to the Store before noon. saw 1 nice MILF. Came home and purchased some SILVER on the internet, first time I’ve done that. kinda got ripped off on shipping and fees though, but I was really looking to spend X$ on Silver, and that I did. might try a diff vendor next time. I went to one of the big guys and bought Y oz of silver bars. when a gallon of gas costs 9000$ and a loaf of bread costs $1000 and my 1 oz of silver is worth $20k, you’ll rue the day, hehehe.
buy a silver round commemorating the country of your ethnic origin.
trying Jolly Rancher Soft Candies, because I prefer soft chewy fruity candies like Starbust or Mamba. Jolly Rancher Chews are pretty good, not as chewy as starburst, and unfort often leave the tiniest of paper residue on. but still pretty good. 7/10
went for a nice powerwalk, it was not freezing out there, but everything was covered in water and slush, because there was a big snowstorm, then ridiculous subzero cold, then a huge warmup to like 40 degrees, then a ton of rain. I will take it if that’s what it takes to get rid of the ridic cold and snow.
yeah technically that dream DID suck, cuz she was the last gurl I ever Luved, and I won’t have you tell me I didn’t, that I only THINK it was “love”, and I’m Deluded. Nope. It was TRUE LOVE. Otherwise I wouldn’t be having these dreams 15 months after The Rejection. (Although I did see her briefly a little over a month ago, across the room, and I hid from her, and she didn’t see me).
sure there are a few Cute Gurls at muh new job, but I’m not super duper interested in them, I’m not gonna have DREAMS about them, I will pump em and dump em if the time comes, if it doesn’t I just won’t care. even the gurl I thought was REALLY HAWT before, now I think is kinda Stumpy. Well, just the slightest bit stumpier than I thought she was. I Really don’t like Stumpy Legs. HUGE turnoff for me. although with her it’s not so bad I wouldn’t Banger!
At the store I bought a Ridiculous Rain Poncho for doing Powerwalks in the Rain. THey had “emergency ponchos” which were $1 and then slightly nicer ones which were $8, which I bought. Buy a Poncho or Raincoat so you can Walk In The Rain. I did not have to wear it because it stopped raining thank GOD.
I also bought a pair of Dark Blue Relaxed Fit WRANGLER Jeans, and I regret not doing so earlier, or buying Two Pairs right now. (although they were a little expensive, I don’t like paying $24 for jeans, but damn these are WORTH IT.) very masculine jeans with more room in the Seat and Thighs than Normal, f4ggy jeans.