8 21 wednesday

8 21 wed 8am

trying to revamp my sched. my underjob has changed significantly both in scheduling and in the tone if you will: much busier, many more customers/idiots to serve, takes a few weeks to mentally get used to it. Of course, I’m not really any smarter than the idiots because I don’t have a better job. I have the kind of job where Good Girls who have Fathers, their Fathers tell the Girls not to date that loser because he obviously has no ambition in life, hehehehehe.

But best not to think about THAT, and do the work that I can/must do.

Today I am blocking out about 4 hours to work on Muh Project / Homework / Internship. I am even less productive on that at home than I was on my actual Skool Homework, excuse: because the Skool Homework had actual lectures and assignments and tests and due dates. I did not like it, o god how I hated it, but I still managed to do the work at home. (prob wouldn’t have HATED it so much if I had done it Out Of Home.)

But this is a little different: no grades, no iron clad due dates, a lot more open-ended.

5 Days after seeing Girl 7 for the 2nd and hopefully last ever in life time. Breddy much back to “normal”, IE I can get out of bed, go to underjob, and not obsess about her 40% and me being a Huge Loser 60%.

This does not mean I would WANT or could even HANDLE seeing her Every 5 Days!!!! f00K THAT sh1t!!!!

Continuing the powerwalks, the spongebob, the 20 mg in the morn, not drinking a TONNE of coffee, try to just do 1 (BIG) mug between 5-6am and that’s it.

yesterday had a nice actual proper bare minimum o’ life EIGHT hour shift as opposed to a 6,5, or god FORBID 4 huor jagoff shift. The 8 hour shift is great for muh self-esteem because I can feel like I’ve been a respectable person for the day, AND it is way easier than forcing myself to be SuperProductive for 4 hours after a 4 hour jagoff shift, for example, to “make up the difference.” I MUCH prefer Plain Solid Paid WORK for 8 hours straight, because I can actually DO it. It’s EASY compared to that alternative. a WALK IN THE PARK. A WALTZ IN THE PARK.

Check out the vidya by Prof Steve Ilardi of Kansas Univ. I enjoyed his book “The Depression Cure” and I enjoy his talks even moar because he is a hilarious, down-to-earth, engaging, friendly, charismatic guy. EXACTLY the type of guy I would want for my PhD Advisor. (I have this alternate life where I am a Depression PhD and my careeeeeer is doing Research, banging young college students (not my own!), and bringing some real Hard Talk and Common Sense to the topic. However I cannot get into a PhD prog let alone a GOOD one because I screwed up during Undergrad because of “Muh Derpession” AND I’m lazy as hell. Heh. like those EXCUSES?

Again he makes good points about Paleo Man: we would live in groups of 30 to 50, and our “Peer Group” would be like 3 to 5 people. And there was not so much Competition-related Stress among the peer group because every person knew exactly what they were The Best at. With only 5 guys in your Peer Group, everybody truly was the “Michael Jordan of Something.” There was not the Lifelong Jockeying for Rank as what occurs in the Modern World from ages 14 to death, trying to be The Best, compete against Millions for The Best Skools, The Best Jobs, The Best Women.

Our brains and bodies are not designed to cope well with the STRESS we face today, and The Modern Stress is a very different and debilitating kind than thousands of years ago.

Ideally I would like to see Ilardi study The Modern Working Poor, and/or people Enslaved by Debt, and or LAZY LOSERS. They really embody IMHO the Unnatural, Constant, Fight Or Flight Stress Overwhelmment of Struggling Every Day to Survive…..and not really succeeding.

And 30 year old Kissless Virgin Wizards too.

And Dr Steve, if you need an Upper Working Class Fulltime Entry Level Research Assistant, I’M YOUR MAN.  For $9 an hour, hahahahahahahaha. $15 an hour if you can, heheh. I can bring some Real World Skool of Hard Knox Experience that some Neverdepressed, Sexually Active, Successful, Overachieving Collegefag can’t even IMAGINE.

Stefan Molyneux, “Depressed in College? Here’s Why!”

kinda a bait and switch with the title, as it’s much more about The Uselessness of College, how College is Generational Genocide, but I like that topic too, hahahaha. Might get a little too political, but that’s Molyneux for ya hahaha. seems to be a breddy smart guy.

6 pm

forced myself to stick to the schedule. THAT Felt Good, however it was VERY frustrating not to be as Productive on my Project as I wanted to be (Technical Difficulties, Computer stuff always taking 10 times as long as you Schedule it to, lord this could well be a too-stressful career hehehe). Also the space I found was not as quiet as I wanted it to be, and also the Wireless Internet kept going out.  But I STILL accomplished more than I would have at home!

If you can’t accomplish anything at home, do it at the Local Coffeeshop.

Use EARPLUGS if it gets too loud. I brought Earplugs and should have used them when there was a bunch of loud obnoxious people talking like idiots right near me. Either stupid teens talking about getting drunk or lifting weights, or Student Slaves talking about how they have to take 6 chemistry classes and 6 calculus classes and they’re taking 20 credits right now and are at school from 7 am to 10 pm monday thru friday, and have to get at least a 3.8, or else they’ll Never Get A Job, hahahaha. Heh. They should check out Molyneux. It would take a LOT of 18 Year Old QT Action to get me to work THAT hard. f00k it, just give up and become a loser, hahahaha.

but seriously folks. I think about Simple Supply and Demand. WHO/WHAT/WHERE is hiring, WHERE are the JOBS. Know what I mean. it doesn’t matter if Electrical Engineering is A Really Useful Degree to get, if only 1 Electrical Engineer is Hired Per Year. Then it’s by definition a USELESS degree, because it doesn’t get you a job.  (Just for the sake of argument.)

OK I gotta get out of here. I just GOTTA post at least once every 4 days though.

Give All Your Student Loan Money back RIGHT NOW if you haven’t graduated college yet. Get out of that g0ddam trap now while you still can.

Also listen to and enjoy Prof Ilardi. One of the few decent Univ Profs out there.



Comments are closed.