sun july 14 2013

wow. just forced myself to write a new cover letter from scratch. The posting had Three “Desired Qualifications”, ie, things that will make you Seriously Callbackable, so I addressed each one of those specifically. THEN said I bring a certain je ne sais qua because I am that awesome. I am the most perfect candidate for the job over all the MIT gradz. Who, obviously, are too good for this job.

* but the main thing I wanted to write about today was a DREAM I had about the most recent Girl, Girl 7. I had my Official Rejection from Girl 7 in early October 2012, and swore it would take No Less Than Nine Months to Get Over Her. Well, that was just about right. Although maybe a YEAR would be even better. I certainly haven’t developed FEEEEEELINGS towards any other women, well, other than than HNNNNGGGGGG feeling I occasionally get for Young Prime Of Youth Girls!

In the dream I was meeting her out of the blue, a surprise chance meeting somewhere public. I tried to be pleasant and polite and charming and alpha, but I was still In Luv with her, still Butthurt about being rejected, trying not to show it. Adding to the Butthurt was that she was much more Successful than I. Now in real life, this is the case. She was a motivated, engaged, high-achieving student in a program that guarantees a Good Job for at least the Top 20% of Achievers in that program, which she certainly was. Good Lower Middle Class job at the Bachelors Degree Level. (Health Care field, won’t say more than that!) She was young, she clearly did everything right, and thus she reaped what she sowed. Got what she deserved. A Good Job immediately after doing Well and working hard in a Useful Degree.

So that adds to My Butthurt. That she was str8 up the kind of Hard Working Person and Good Student I always wanted to be, but I hate skool too much to do so. Plus I feeeeel way too old.  Anyway when I was her age and in skool I hated skool too much, then starting smoking too much w33d, not Overachieving, and performance slipping, hating everything. I didn’t just want HER, but I wanted her Healthy Mind, where she didn’t hate skool, and she did the right thing re skool, and now has a nice little lower middle class life, job security, making decent money at a young age, good stable respectable job right out of college, might go back for masters degree later, but doesn’t even really HAVE to!

The dream I pretty much already explained. I met her randomly, we talked, I was immediately feeling butthurt, and trying and failing to hide it, being all omega about her winning in life, me losing in life, and her rejecting me.

THANKFULLY that was about it, nothing extreme, no her getting Gangbanged in front of me. Dream ended pretty quickly. I USED to have TONS of VERY vivid dreams, even just like a year ago; now, hardly anything.

The point is, No Contact is Necessary. If I WERE to Real Life See Her again, that would be Ripping Open a Gaping Wound and the past 9 months would be Flushed Down The Crapper. Because when True Luv is THAT Real, it isn’t some fleeting thing that goes away in a few weeks or a few months. It’s FO LIFE. That’s when you KNOW it’s REAL. Thus, I must keep No Contact with her, FO LIFE.

Normalfags think this is creepy, omega, weird, obsessive, stalkery, scary, whatever. This Is What I Think True Love Is. You Go Literally CRAZY for the person. It is stronger than ANYTHING you’ve ever felt before. The idea of MARRYING them sounds GOOD. CRAZY In Luv.

So her, I totally wanted to Monogamously Date. Started as Infatuation, then the Infatuation LASTED months and months and months as I got to know her better. My mistake of course was obviously Taking Too Long, but I had an ok reason for that, which I won’t mention here. As soon as that reason disappeared, I more blatantly tried to Escalate, because I had already waited too long and couldn’t take it anymore, and needed some kind of answer, and boy did I get it!

Heh. At least I didn’t get FRIENDZONED, hahahaha.

TLDR: that dream sucked because it brought her back up after many months, but it didn’t suck as bad as it could have, and usually dreams only affect you only one day after you have them, so things will be fine starting tomorrow.

But yeah you know you were in LOVE with somebody when you have a DREAM about them 9 months after not seeing them. So continue not seeing them. No Contact is simply The Best Thing There Is. God Damn, I would be an even BIGGER loser if I were not in No Contact with her. Could you imagine. Me looking at her FACEBOOK for the next 10 YEARS, watching her Update her Career and her Relationships! I have a Fake Facebook that I use just to Log In to facebook, and I would use it just to look at her profile picture regularly; she was smart enough not to make anything else public. I couldn’t even imagine being REALLY on Facebook and having her as my Friend where I could actually SEE all those soul-crushing details!



* Also, if you can go to an ALL-MALE COLLEGE, DO IT. hahaha not too many of those. But you do NOT want to be DISTRACTED by the thought of WOMEN during your Make It Or Break It College Years. All it takes it One Wrong Woman and you will go CRAZY and flush your whole LIFE down the toilet, and you can’t even rightfully BLAME it on her, because it’s YOUR OWN fault to overreact so much…..but that doesn’t get your life back out of the toilet and your College Years Unruined!

* So they don’t have Tutors for the Hardest Classes, where you’d actually need the tutors the most. So whaddya do?

* BECOME STUDY BUDDIES WITH THE SMARTEST KID IN CLASS. Use HIM as your tutor. There’s always one kid who knows everything, has the highest grade, always answering questions, always studying, you know right away he’s gonna Succeed In Life. Real Good Work Ethic. So you GLOM ONTO HIM. Be like Hey Buddy Can I Go With You To The Library and we can study, No Homo? There you can do homework and study for tests and learn from him, emulate his habits, ask him questions about what led him to this point and what he’s gonna do in the future, and you can become his clone. More on that later. GREAT Idea. It doesn’t matter that there’s no tutor, you can Make Your Own Tutor with Smart Study Buddy!